Dave Arena
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Dave Arena and “I agree to the terms of this release form.”
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What we learned doing this assignment is that once again most of this information was already determined by previous lessons but we were able to really double-check and make sure the elements for each scene were there and solidify some scenes that were a bit light either in empathy/distress and/or action.
Couple Goals Beat Sheet/Outline
A story = the lifestyle situation Liz helps with
B story = Liz and Eric
C story = family and society relationships/dynamicsShow Concept: a suppressed swinger after being exposed by her childhood best friend starts using her hair salon as a front for sex and relationship advice in order to finally live her truth.
Inciting Incident: Liz’s childhood best friend, Michelle shows up at the local swing club and sees Liz and her husband Eric. After Liz helps Michelle explore the lifestyle in an attempt to save her marriage, she feels like this is her purpose and decides to help strangers with sex and relationship advice using her hair salon as a front.
Everything in this pilot must deliver on the show concept and create the Inciting Incident.
Teaser
INT. CLUB CARNAL – NIGHT: INTRIGUING WORLD
Liz has sex in an open room of a swinger club while her husband, Eric, and others watch. She locks eyes with a woman appearing in the doorway who is on her cell phone. Liz abruptly jumps up and then slams the door in her face ending her and Eric’s night prematurely. Eric never saw the woman.
Start: Liz has sex while her husband, Eric, and others watch
Challenging Situation: a woman appears in her doorway on her cell phone
Conflict: cell phones are against the rules
Action: Liz abruptly jumps up and slams the door on her
Finish: Liz and Eric’s night is over prematurely
Open Loop: why did Liz slam the door?
Mystery: why does Liz have these beliefs about monogamy, sex, and relationships? How did Liz and Eric become swingers?
Empathy/Distress: Plot intruding on life (Liz’s childhood best friend was at her door but the audience and Eric don’t know).
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup: Liz and Eric are experienced swingers and why did Liz slam the door?
ACT 1
EXT. CLUB CARNAL – SAME NIGHT: IMMINENT THREAT
As they walk toward their car, Eric accuses Liz of being the “swinger police” and ruining their night, but then they both see the girl from the doorway and Eric blurts out “Michelle?” Liz beelines for her, Eric grabs her and pushes them down behind their car door. Liz tells Eric that’s who she slammed the door on. Liz seems relieved someone knows about their secret while Eric freaks out. Liz charges after Michelle to find out why she’s there but Michelle gets in her car and speeds off.
Start: Liz and Eric argue about Liz ruining their night
Challenging Situation: their secret lifestyle is exposed by someone they know
Conflict: Liz doesn’t care and wants to confront her, Eric freaks out
Action: they hide behind their car and argue about what to do
Finish: Liz charges Michelle, but she gets in her car and speeds off
Open Loop: who is Michelle and why is she at the swing club? why is Liz glad their lifestyle is now known? What happens now?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Extreme consequences/Plot intruding on life (being exposed by someone close to them). External character conflicts (Liz doesn’t care and Eric does).
Payoff: (Setup: Liz and Eric are experienced swingers and why did Liz slam the door?) Payoff: their lifestyle has been a secret and now someone they’re close to knows.
Irony:
Setup: who is Michelle and what happens now?
ACT 2
INT. BATHROOM – DAY: SECRET IDENTITY
The next day at a birthday party for Liz’s dad, Michelle is there and we learn that she is Liz’s childhood best friend and like a sister to her. Michelle tells Liz that she was at the club to spice up her marriage and promises Liz and Eric their secret is safe with her. Eric, in an attempt to keep the exposure to a minimum, gets Michelle and Liz to promise this ends here, but he doesn’t believe Michelle can keep her mouth shut. Then Michelle blurts out that she’s already told her husband.
Start: Michelle promises Liz and Eric their secret is safe with her
Challenging Situation: keeping the exposure to a minimum
Conflict: Eric doesn’t believe that blabbermouth Michelle can keep this secret
Action: Eric gets Michelle and Liz to promise this ends here
Finish: Michelle already told her husband
Open Loop: will Michelle keep their secret or expose them more? will Michelle’s husband be a threat to Liz and Eric?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: External character conflicts (Michelle, Liz and Eric). Brings their wound present (Eric’s insecurity and not liking uncertainty).
Payoff:
Irony: Michelle tells Liz and Eric their secret is safe with her, but she’s already told her husband
Setup:
INT. LIZ’S PARENT’S LIVING ROOM – CONTINUOUS: WOUND
Liz’s younger sister, Teresa plays a video of old family photos as a gift to her dad, Don. When some photos come up that trigger their mom, Christine, she shames Don and Liz setting off a huge family fight where Don just walks off to his room and Liz storms off.
Start: Teresa plays a video of old family photos as a gift to her dad
Challenging Situation: there are photos in there that trigger Liz’s mom
Conflict: Liz’s Mom, Christine shames Liz and her dad, Don regarding the photos
Action: a huge family fight breaks out
Finish: Liz’s dad goes to his room and slams the door, Liz storms off
Open Loop:
Mystery: Why does Maria treat Don and Liz so badly? What does she mean by “he doesn’t even deserve the parentheses”? Why is Liz and Teresa’s relationship so combative and competitive?
Empathy/Distress: External character conflicts (Christine & Liz, Liz & Teresa, Christine & Don, Eric & Christine). Undeserved misfortune (Liz and Don publicly shamed). Brings their wound present (Liz and Don – judgment and shame).
Payoff: (setup: who is Michelle) Payoff: Michelle is Liz’s childhood best friend and like a sister to her.
Irony: Christine is so Christian but not so Christian like towards Liz and Don.
Setup: What’s up with Liz’s dad and the family dynamics?
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – DAY: HIDDEN AGENDA
Michelle admits to Liz that she’s pursuing swinging not to spice up her marriage, but to save it and asks for Liz’s help. Liz knows this is a recipe for disaster and she promised Eric to end this, but she can’t have her friend go at this alone. Liz tells Michelle that she’ll come up with a plan to help her without Eric finding out.
Start: Michelle admits to Liz that she’s pursuing swinging not to spice up her marriage, but to save it.
Challenging Situation: Liz doesn’t want to help because she knows this is a recipe for disaster, but she can’t have her friend do this alone
Conflict: Liz promised Eric this would end and now she’s going to help Michelle behind his back
Action: Michelle shows Liz “Swinger TikTok” and Liz can’t believe the followers these people have (and the bad advice they give). Michelle asks Liz to help her and her husband have their first swinger experience
Finish: Liz tells Michelle she’ll come up with a plan
Open Loop: what is going on with Michelle’s marriage? will Michelle actually participate in swinging? how will swinging affect Michelle’s marriage? what plan will Liz come up with to help Michelle?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Undeserved misfortune (Michelle given an ultimatum by her husband). Witnessing the pain of others (Michelle’s marriage is on the rocks). Extreme consequences (divorce for Michelle and potentially for Liz going behind Eric’s back). Brings their wound present (Michelle not being worthy of love). External character conflicts (Liz can decide not to help Michelle and watch her friend fail miserably or at least try and help her navigate a world that she’s an expert in even though she knows she’ll still probably fail miserably).
Payoff:
Irony: Swinging should be the last thing you do to save a bad marriage.
Setup: Liz has to come up with a plan to help Michelle and Michelle shows Liz about Swinger TikTok which sets up Liz’s need to help people.
Act 3
INT. KANE HOUSE – NIGHT: DECEPTION/CONSPIRACY
Liz convinces Eric that she should attend the “naughty school girl” house party alone so she can send him a video of her exploits but it’s really a cover for helping Michelle. Liz tells him a mutual friend is picking her up, but it’s Michelle and her husband.
Start: Liz convinces Eric that she should attend the swinger house party alone
Challenging Situation: it’s a cover-up for helping Michelle
Conflict: she’s involving herself and doing it behind Eric’s back
Action: Liz tells Eric that if she goes to the party alone, she can send him a video of her naughtiness and that a mutual friend is picking her up
Finish: Michelle and her husband pick Liz up.
Open Loop: will Liz and Eric’s daughter Emma find out about their lifestyle? what will happen when Eric finds out Liz deceived him? Will Liz’s plan work?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Plot intruding on life (Liz has to convince Eric that she should go to this party alone so she can help Michelle).
Payoff: (Setup: Liz has to come up with a plan to help Michelle). Payoff: This is the plan.
Irony:
Setup: What’s going to happen with this plan?
INT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT: WOUND
Liz and Michelle enter the party with Michelle’s husband and the woman they are going to have a threesome with — it’s sex everywhere – Michelle is shell-shocked. Liz sets them up in a private room. Michelle gets cold feet, walks out of the room, and vomits in the hallway. Her husband stays in the room with the other woman and Liz escorts Michelle outside.
Start: Liz and Michelle enter the party — it’s sex everywhere – Michelle is shell-shocked.
Challenging Situation: Michelle gets cold feet
Conflict: Michelle’s husband stays in the room with the other woman while Michelle walks out
Action: Michelle walks out of the room and vomits in the hallway.
Finish: Liz gets Michelle out of the party.
Open Loop: What happens with Michelle’s marriage now?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Undeserved misfortune (Michelle gets cold feet but her husband stays in the room with another woman). External character conflicts (Liz & Michelle’s husband, Michelle and Michelle’s husband). Plans that failed (the swinging made things worse for Michelle’s marriage). Witnessing the pain of others (Michelle). Extreme consequences (potential divorce). Brings their wound present (Michelle: unworthy of love).
Payoff: (Setup: What’s going to happen with this plan?) Payoff: it fails miserably.
Irony: swinging was meant to help Michelle’s marriage and she leaves the party without him.
Setup: What happens now?
EXT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT: WOUND
Michelle is a hot mess outside the party as Liz tries to calm her down. Michelle then tells Liz this is all her fault and that “whores like her are who ruin marriages.” They have a huge fight and Michelle leaves Liz at the party alone. Now, Liz has to come clean to Eric as she calls him to pick her up.
Start: Michelle sobs
Challenging Situation: Liz’s plan failed miserably and now she has to tell Eric
Conflict: Michelle blames Liz and shames her
Action: Liz and Michelle get in a fight
Finish: Michelle leaves Liz at the party alone and Liz needs to call Eric
Open Loop: Is this the end of Michelle’s marriage? Is this the end of Michelle and Liz’s friendship? What will happen with Liz and Eric?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Undeserved misfortune (Liz gets blamed for trying to help). External character conflicts (Liz and Michelle). Plot intruding on life (Liz has to call Eric and he finds out she deceived him). Plans that failed. Witnessing the pain of others (Liz and Michelle). Extreme consequences (potentially the end of a life long friendship). Brings their wound present (Liz: shame & judgment, Michelle: unworthy of love).
Payoff: (Setup: What happens now?) Payoff: Liz’s plan fails miserably
Irony:
Setup: What will happen with Liz and Michelle?
INT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT: HIDDEN AGENDA
While Liz waits for Eric, she goes back into the house to get the video she promised him. She grabs one of the creeper guys who hit on her earlier and tells him he can cum on her ass – no touching! Then, she throws him her phone and instructs him to film it.
Start: Liz waits for Eric
Challenging Situation: she has to get Eric the video she promised
Conflict:
Action: Liz goes back into the house and tells a creeper guy standing alone in the corner that he can cum on her ass
Finish: She throws him her phone and tells him to film it.
(Continuation of the previous scene).
INT. CAR – SAME NIGHT: DECEPTION
Eric gives Liz the silent treatment as they drive which Liz can’t stand. She screams at him “yell at me, anything…” but he doesn’t take the bait and remains quiet. She turns up the volume on the radio as they drive to Lita Ford’s Kiss Me Deadly.
Start: Liz and Eric drive in silence
Challenging Situation: she can’t stand his silent treatment
Conflict: Eric is pissed at her deception
Action: Liz yells at him “saying anything is better than this!” He doesn’t take the bait and remains quiet.
Finish: She turns up the volume on the radio as they drive to Lita Ford’s Kiss Me Deadly.
Open Loop: what will happen with Liz and Eric?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Undeserved misfortune (Eric being deceived). External character conflicts (Liz and Eric). Plans that failed (Liz trying to help Michelle without Eric finding out). Witnessing the pain of others (Liz and Eric). Extreme consequences (potential marital problems). Brings their wound present (Liz: shame and juadgment, Eric: insecurity, trigger is being lied to/deceived).
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup: What will happen with Liz and Eric?
Act 4
INT. CAR – DAY: WOUND
Eric slept in his car all night. The back driver’s side window crashes in. Liz threw a rock threw it, then gets in the car. She tells Eric that’s the first and last time he ever sleeps without her. Liz and Eric have a heart-to-heart about how she needs to live authentically and doesn’t want to keep their lifestyle private anymore. Eric reminds her of the stakes if they go public. Eric agrees to support her even though he knows that if they go public, it’s going to be difficult for them, but if they don’t, he risks Liz resenting him.
Start: Liz throws a rock through their car window and gets in with Eric.
Challenging Situation: If Liz continues to help people, they risk being further exposed and it may negatively impact his marriage (and life), but if he gets his wish and she shuts it down, she may resent him and that could also negatively affect his marriage (and life)
Conflict: Eric doesn’t want their lifestyle public, but Liz does
Action: Liz tells Eric she wants to give sex and relationship advice from her hair salon
Finish: Eric agrees to support Liz if she keeps it on the down low
Open Loop: how will this decision affect Liz and Eric? how will this decision affect their daughter? how will Liz deal with the shame and judgment as they are exposed more? how will Liz deal with her family potentially finding out? how will this affect Liz’s business? how will this affect Eric’s job/career? how will Eric get comfortable with the uncertainty?
Mystery: why is Liz so motivated to help people with sex and relationship advice? what regret is Liz’s dad living with? Why is Eric miserable at his job?
Empathy/Distress: External character conflicts (Liz wants their lifestyle public and help others with their relationships and Eric wants to protect them and keep it private). Extreme consequences (divorce, how this will affect their daughter, losing family, shame & judgment, Liz’s regret). Brings their wound present (Liz: judgment & shame, Eric: insecurity/uncertainty).
Payoff: (Setup: What will happen with Liz and Eric?) Payoff: For now, they reconcile and come to an agreement.
Irony: Liz failed Michelle miserably but she feels helping people with their relationships is her purpose
Setup: What will happen with Liz and Eric long term?
INT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY: WOUND
Eric sits alone having his coffee. A text comes in from Liz – it’s the video of her from the house party. A mom who sits next to him catches him watching it and she leaves disgusted.
Start: Eric having coffee alone
Challenging Situation:
Conflict: Eric is embarrassed publicly
Action: Liz texts Eric the video from the house party. He views it and then realizes what it is – but, it’s too late as a mom next to him sees it. He tells her “sorry, it’s just my wife.”
Finish: the mom leaves disgusted
Open Loop: How is Eric going to handle potentially being more and more public?
Mystery: Why is Eric so insecure and afraid of uncertainty?
Empathy/Distress: Brings their wound present (Eric Insecurity)
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup:
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – DAY: WOUND
Liz tells Michelle that if she ever shames her like that again, she’ll rip her head off. Despite Liz telling Michelle that her marriage is irreparable, Michelle decides to stay with her husband. A woman who saw a TikTok post from Liz comes into the salon for her sex advice. Liz tells Michelle to not tell Eric about the TikTok.
Start: Liz tells Michelle that if she ever shames her like that again, she’ll rip her head off.
Challenging Situation: Michelle unfairly shamed Liz. Liz knows Michelle’s marriage is irreparable.
Conflict: Liz and Michelle are at odds
Action: Liz and Michelle talk it out. A woman who saw a TikTok post from Liz comes into the salon for her sex advice.
Finish: Liz tells Michelle to not tell Eric about the TikTok.
Open Loop: how will the community react once they find out Liz is giving advice from the hair salon? how does this affect Michelle since she co-owns the salon? will Michelle end up divorced and if so, will she ever find her happily ever after?
Mystery: why is Liz so sensitive to being shamed and judged?
Empathy/Distress: External character conflicts (Liz and Michelle, Michelle & her husband). Witnessing the pain of others (Liz and Michelle). Brings their wound present (Liz and Michelle).
Payoff: (Setup: Michelle tells Liz about Swinger TikTok.) Payoff: Liz uses Swinger TikTok to help others.
Irony:
Setup: What future lifestyle/swinger/sex situations will Liz help with? Who else will find out about Liz and Eric’s lifestyle? How will going public affect Liz and Eric’s marriage? How far will Liz go with the sexpert idea? Will Liz and Eric’s daughter find out? What will happen with Michelle’s marriage?
Act 5/Tag
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – NIGHT: SECRET IDENTITY
After hours at the hair salon – Liz is cleaning up by herself when there is a knock on the door. Liz unlocks it and lets a woman in. But, it’s actually her dad in a wig and bad makeup. He sits in her chair and she styles his wig. Liz’s dad is the only person who knew about Liz and Eric’s secret.
Start: After hours at the hair salon – Liz is cleaning up by herself
Challenging Situation: Liz’s dad is secretly trans
Conflict: Liz helps him
Action: A knock on the door. Liz lets a woman in. But, it’s actually her dad in a wig and bad makeup. She helps him style his wig for a night out.
Finish: Liz’s dad is the only person who knew about Liz and Eric’s secret
Open Loop: what is the significance of the relationship between Liz and her dad? will Liz’s dad ever come out as trans?
Mystery: what’s the backstory of Liz and her dad’s relationship? why is Liz’s dad still married to his mom if he’s trans?
Empathy/Distress: Brings their wound present (Don’s shame)
Payoff: This is why Liz wants to help others. This is why Liz’s mom treats both of them badly (resentment)
Irony: Liz wants to help her dad live his truth but she’s not living hers
Setup: Who else will find out about Liz and Eric’s lifestyle? How will going public affect Liz and Eric’s marriage? How far will Liz go with the sexpert idea? Will Liz and Eric’s daughter find out? What will happen with Michelle’s marriage?
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by Dave Arena.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by
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What we learned doing this assignment is that we had most of the information already compiled for this, but it was very helpful to make sure we had a scene arc that started in a specific place and then ended in a specific place. Also, to make sure we had that conflict and/or challenge built into the scene. I think this assures that everything flows well but also that we don’t have any scenes that aren’t serving a specific purpose.
Couple Goals Beat Sheet
A story = the lifestyle situation Liz helps with
B story = Liz and Eric
C story = family and society relationships/dynamicsShow Concept: a suppressed swinger after being exposed by her childhood best friend starts using her hair salon as a front for sex and relationship advice in order to finally live her truth.
Inciting Incident: Liz’s childhood best friend, Michelle shows up at the local swing club and sees Liz and her husband Eric. After Liz helps Michelle explore the lifestyle in an attempt to save her marriage, she feels like this is her purpose and decides to help strangers with sex and relationship advice using her hair salon as a front.
Teaser
INT. CLUB CARNAL – NIGHT
Liz has sex in an open room of a swinger club while her husband, Eric, and others watch. She locks eyes with a woman appearing in the doorway who is on her cell phone. Liz abruptly jumps up and then slams the door in her face ending her and Eric’s night prematurely. Eric never saw the woman.
Start: Liz has sex while her husband, Eric, and others watch
Challenging Situation: a woman appears in her doorway on her cell phone
Conflict: cell phones are against the rules
Action: Liz abruptly jumps up and slams the door on her
Finish: Liz and Eric’s night is over prematurely
ACT 1
EXT. CLUB CARNAL – SAME NIGHT
As they walk toward their car, Eric accuses Liz of being the “swinger police” and ruining their night, but then they both see the girl from the doorway and Eric blurts out “Michelle?” Liz beelines for her, Eric grabs her and pushes them down behind their car door. Liz tells Eric that’s who she slammed the door on. Liz seems relieved someone knows about their secret while Eric freaks out. Liz charges after Michelle to find out why she’s there but Michelle gets in her car and speeds off.
Start: Liz and Eric argue about Liz ruining their night
Challenging Situation: their secret lifestyle is exposed by someone they know
Conflict: Liz doesn’t care and wants to confront her, Eric freaks out
Action: they hide behind their car and argue about what to do
Finish: Liz charges Michelle, but she gets in her car and speeds off
ACT 2
INT. BATHROOM – DAY
The next day at a birthday party for Liz’s dad, Michelle is there and we learn that she is Liz’s childhood best friend and like a sister to her. Michelle tells Liz that she was at the club to spice up her marriage and promises Liz and Eric their secret is safe with her. Eric, in an attempt to keep the exposure to a minimum, gets Michelle and Liz to promise this ends here, but he doesn’t believe Michelle can keep her mouth shut. Then Michelle blurts out that she’s already told her husband.
Start: Michelle promises Liz and Eric their secret is safe with her
Challenging Situation: keeping the exposure to a minimum
Conflict: Eric doesn’t believe that blabbermouth Michelle can keep this secret
Action: Eric gets Michelle and Liz to promise this ends here
Finish: Michelle already told her husband
INT. LIZ’S PARENT’S LIVING ROOM – CONTINUOUS
Liz’s younger sister, Teresa plays a video of old family photos as a gift to her dad, Don. When some photos come up that trigger their mom, Christine, she shames Don and Liz setting off a huge family fight where Don just walks off to his room and Liz storms off.
Start: Teresa plays a video of old family photos as a gift to her dad
Challenging Situation: there are photos in there that trigger Liz’s mom
Conflict: Liz’s Mom, Christine shames Liz and her dad, Don regarding the photos
Action: a huge family fight breaks out
Finish: Liz’s dad goes to his room and slams the door, Liz storms off
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – DAY
Michelle admits to Liz that she’s pursuing swinging not to spice up her marriage, but to save it and asks for Liz’s help. Liz knows this is a recipe for disaster and she promised Eric to end this, but she can’t have her friend go at this alone. Liz tells Michelle that she’ll come up with a plan to help her without Eric finding out.
Start: Michelle admits to Liz that she’s pursuing swinging not to spice up her marriage, but to save it.
Challenging Situation: Liz doesn’t want to help because she knows this is a recipe for disaster, but she can’t have her friend go alone
Conflict: Liz promised Eric this would end and now she’s going to help Michelle behind his back
Action: Michelle asks Liz to help her and her husband have their first swinger experience
Finish: Liz tells Michelle she’ll come up with a plan
Act 3
INT. KANE HOUSE – NIGHT
Liz convinces Eric that she should attend the “naughty school girl” house party alone so she can send him a video of her exploits but it’s really a cover for helping Michelle. Liz tells him a mutual friend is picking her up, but it’s Michelle and her husband.
Start: Liz convinces Eric that she should attend the swinger house party alone
Challenging Situation: it’s a cover-up for helping Michelle
Conflict: she’s involving herself and doing it behind Eric’s back
Action: Liz tells Eric that if she goes to the party alone, she can send him a video of her naughtiness and that a mutual friend is picking her up
Finish: Michelle and her husband pick Liz up.
INT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT
Liz and Michelle enter the party with Michelle’s husband and the woman they are going to have a threesome with — it’s sex everywhere – Michelle is shell-shocked. Liz sets them up in a private room. Michelle gets cold feet, walks out of the room, and vomits in the hallway. Her husband stays in the room with the other woman and Liz escorts Michelle outside.
Start: Liz and Michelle enter the party — it’s sex everywhere – Michelle is shell-shocked.
Challenging Situation: Michelle gets cold feet
Conflict: Michelle’s husband stays in the room with the other woman while Michelle walks out
Action: Michelle walks out of the room and vomits in the hallway.
Finish: Liz gets Michelle out of the party.
EXT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT
Michelle is a hot mess outside the party as Liz tries to calm her down. Michelle then tells Liz this is all her fault and that “whores like her are who ruin marriages.” They have a huge fight and Michelle leaves Liz at the party alone. Now, Liz has to come clean to Eric as she calls him to pick her up.
Start: Michelle sobs
Challenging Situation: Liz’s plan failed miserably and now she has to tell Eric
Conflict: Michelle blames Liz and shames her
Action: Liz and Michelle get in a fight
Finish: Michelle leaves Liz at the party alone and Liz needs to call Eric
INT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT
While Liz waits for Eric, she goes back into the house to get the video she promised him. She grabs one of the creeper guys who hit on her earlier and tells him he can cum on her ass – no touching! Then, she throws him her phone and instructs him to film it.
Start: Liz waits for Eric
Challenging Situation: she has to get Eric the video she promised
Conflict:
Action: Liz goes back into the house and tells a creeper guy standing alone in the corner that he can cum on her ass
Finish: She throws him her phone and tells him to film it.
INT. CAR – SAME NIGHT
Eric gives Liz the silent treatment as they drive which Liz can’t stand. She screams at him “yell at me, anything…” but he doesn’t take the bait and remains quiet. She turns up the volume on the radio as they drive to Lita Ford’s Kiss Me Deadly.
Start: Liz and Eric drive in silence
Challenging Situation: she can’t stand his silent treatment
Conflict: Eric is pissed at her deception
Action: Liz yells at him “saying anything is better than this!” He doesn’t take the bait and remains quiet.
Finish: She turns up the volume on the radio as they drive to Lita Ford’s Kiss Me Deadly.
Act 4
INT. KANE HOUSE – DAY
Liz and Eric have a heart-to-heart about how she needs to live authentically and doesn’t want to keep their lifestyle private anymore. Eric reminds her of the stakes if they go public. Eric agrees to support her even though he knows that if they go public, it’s going to be difficult for them, but if they don’t, he risks Liz resenting him.
Start: Liz confronts Eric
Challenging Situation:
Conflict: Eric doesn’t want their lifestyle public, but Liz not only wants it public but wants to help others
Action: Liz tells Eric she wants to give sex and relationship advice from her hair salon
Finish: Eric agrees to support Liz if she keeps it on the down low
INT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY
Eric sits alone having his coffee. A text comes in from Liz – it’s the video of her from the house party. A mom who sits next to him catches him watching it and she leaves disgusted.
Start: Eric having coffee alone
Challenging Situation:
Conflict: Eric is embarrassed publicly
Action: Liz texts Eric the video from the house party. He views it and then realizes what it is – but, it’s too late as a mom next to him sees it. He tells her “sorry, it’s just my wife.”
Finish: the mom leaves disgusted
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – DAY
Liz tells Michelle that if she ever shames her like that again, she’ll rip her head off. Despite Liz telling Michelle that her marriage is irreparable, Michelle decides to stay with her husband. A woman who saw a TikTok post from Liz comes into the salon for her sex advice. Liz tells Michelle to not tell Eric about the TikTok.
Start: Liz tells Michelle that if she ever shames her like that again, she’ll rip her head off.
Challenging Situation: Michelle unfairly shamed Liz. Liz knows Michelle’s marriage is irreparable.
Conflict: Liz and Michelle are at odds
Action: Liz ad Michelle talk it out. A woman who saw a TikTok post from Liz comes into the salon for her sex advice. Liz tells Michelle to not tell Eric about the TikTok.
Finish: Liz tells Michelle to not tell Eric about the TikTok.
Act 5/Tag
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – NIGHT
After hours at the hair salon – Liz is cleaning up by herself when there is a knock on the door. Liz unlocks it and lets a woman in. But, it’s actually her dad in a wig and bad makeup. He sits in her chair and she styles his wig. Liz’s dad is the only person who knew about Liz and Eric’s secret.
Start: After hours at the hair salon – Liz is cleaning up by herself
Challenging Situation: Liz’s dad is secretly trans
Conflict: Liz helps him
Action: A knock on the door. Liz lets a woman in. But, it’s actually her dad in a wig and bad makeup. She helps him style his wig for a night out.
Finish: Liz’s dad is the only person who knew about Liz and Eric’s secret
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by Dave Arena.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by
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What we learned doing this assignment is that this was pretty easy considering we had already done the outline and could take the information from there. It’s still a challenge to write concisely and get the essence of the scene so it’s good practice for that. We also liked how we were able to see the entire pilot flow very quickly by reading the beat sheet.
Couple Goals Beat Sheet
A story = the lifestyle situation Liz helps with
B story = Liz and Eric
C story = family and society relationships/dynamics
Show Concept: a suppressed swinger after being exposed by her childhood best friend starts using her hair salon as a front for sex and relationship advice in order to finally live her truth.
Inciting Incident: Liz’s childhood best friend, Michelle shows up at the local swing club and sees Liz and her husband Eric. After Liz helps Michelle explore the lifestyle in an attempt to save her marriage, she feels like this is her purpose and decides to help strangers with sex and relationship advice using her hair salon as a front.
Teaser
INT. CLUB CARNAL – NIGHT
Liz has sex in a swinger club while others including her husband watch, then Liz slams the door on a woman for being on her cell phone.
ACT 1
EXT. CLUB CARNAL – SAME NIGHT
Outside the club, they see the same woman and Liz tells Eric that’s who she slammed the door on. Their secret has been exposed by someone they know.
ACT 2
INT. BATHROOM – DAY
Liz confronts Michelle about the club and Eric makes them swear to squash it so they aren’t exposed further.
INT. LIZ’S PARENT’S LIVING ROOM – CONTINUOUS
Liz’s mom shames Liz and her dad during his and Michelle’s birthday party where we learn Michelle is Liz’s childhood best friend who is like a sister.
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – DAY
Michelle admits to Liz that she was at the swinger club to help save her marriage and asks for Liz’s help.
Act 3
INT. KANE HOUSE – NIGHT
Liz convinces Eric that she should attend a swinger house party alone so she can send him a video of her naughtiness but it’s a cover for helping Michelle.
INT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT
Liz tries to help Michelle and her husband with their first swinger experience, but it fails miserably. Michelle leaves without her husband.
EXT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT
Michelle blames Liz and leaves. Eric has to pick Liz up from the party and finds out about her deceptive plan.
INT. HOUSE PARTY – SAME NIGHT
While Liz waits for Eric, she goes back into the house to get the video she promised him.
INT. CAR – SAME NIGHT
Liz and Eric drive in silence. She screams at him to say something but he doesn’t take the bait.
Act 4
INT. KANE HOUSE – DAY
Liz and Eric have a heart-to-heart about how she needs to live authentically and wants to keep helping people. He reminds her of the stakes if they are public.
INT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY
Eric gets caught by a mom watching the video Liz sent him from the party.
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – DAY
Liz and Michelle reconcile. Despite Liz telling Michelle that her marriage is irreparable, Michelle decides to stay with her husband. A woman who saw a TikTok post from Liz comes into the salon for her sex advice. Liz tells Michelle to not tell Eric about the TikTok.
Act 5/Tag
INT. HOT LOCKS HAIR SALON – NIGHT
After hours at her hair salon, Liz helps her dad style his wig for a night out. He is a closeted trans.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by Dave Arena.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by
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What we learned doing this assignment was that all of these major series setups were already included in our pilot outline based on the work we’ve already done. We are really feeling the momentum now and completely trust this entire process. Some of the decisions we got stuck on or were difficult earlier in the course are now making the final stages of the outline so much easier.
MAJOR FUTURE SERIES SET UP IN THE PILOT:
- What future lifestyle/swinger/sex situations will Liz help with?
- Who else will find out about Liz and Eric’s lifestyle?
- How will being public affect Liz and Eric’s marriage?
- How far will Liz go with the sexpert idea?
- Will Liz and Eric’s daughter find out?
- What will happen with Michelle’s marriage?
- What is the backstory/history between Liz and her trans dad and will he come out?
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What we learned doing this assignment is once again, a lot of these elements were already in place from doing previous work, but what we could improve on is increasing the empathy/distress by making certain situations even worse.
1. Look through your outline and see if any of these as a bigger frame for your story, or if you already have it in the story, can you emphasize or expand it:
A. Crucible – Eric has to trust Liz while getting used to being comfortable with the uncomfortable (and the unknown) of their lifestyle becoming more and more public.
B. Betrayal – Liz suggests to Eric that she go to a house party alone so she can send him a video of her being naughty without him. He agrees and is excited about it. But, it’s really a coverup to help Michelle.
C. Forced Decision – Liz can decide not to help Michelle and watch her friend fail miserably or at least try and help her navigate a world that she’s an expert in even though she knows she’ll still probably fail miserably.
D. Hurt those they love
E. Emotional Dilemma – If Michelle doesn’t pursue swinging, her marriage will probably fail. If she does start swinging just to appease her husband, her marriage will probably fail.
E. Emotional Dilemma – If Liz continues to help people, they risk being further exposed and it may negatively impact his marriage (and life), but if he gets his wish and she shuts it down, she may resent him and that could also negatively affect his marriage (and life).
E. Emotional Dilemma – Liz tells Eric she’s going to keep helping people because she feels alive for the first time with this secret off her chest, but the more she pushes, the potential exposure can negatively affect her husband and daughter plus she would have to deal with being judged and shamed by family and society. If she doesn’t pursue this, though, she will be full of regret and resentment.
F. Exposed – Liz and Eric’s 15 year secret swinger lifestyle is exposed by her childhood best friend.
G. Must Make Decision with Future Consequences – Liz deciding to give sex and relationship advice from her hair salon.
G. Must Make Decision with Future Consequences – Liz says she’ll figure out a plan to help Michelle without Eric knowing.
2. Looking at your scenes, are there places you can create situations to cause more Empathy/Distress?
Step 1: Check each scene to see if you can build any of these forms of Empathy/Distress into them.
Undeserved misfortune
Eric gets cummed on
Liz being shamed by her mom in front of the family
Michelle’s husband giving her an ultimatum
Michelle tells Liz that this is all her fault and “whores like her are who ruin marriages.”
External character conflicts
Eric is upset that Liz once again cut his one night a week of fun short
Liz is relieved that their lifestyle is exposed, Eric is panicked.
Liz wants to keep helping people and be public about their lifestyle, Eric wants to keep it private.
Family dynamics
Plot intruding on life
Liz and Eric’s swinger lifestyle has been exposed by someone they know.
Plans that failed
Liz has failed both Michelle and Eric
Michelle has failed with swinging
Eric has failed to get Liz and Michelle to squash the secret about their lifestyle
Witnessing the pain of others
Eric seeing Liz hurt by her mom
Liz seeing Michelle hurt by her husband
Extreme consequences
Eric reminds Liz of the stakes – their daughter – his job – her business – her stupid family
Michelle spills all the tea that her husband gave her an ultimatum, that they try swinging or their marriage is over
Liz bangs on the door to confront Michelle’s husband, but Michelle tells her she’s obviously not worth it to him and she just wants to go home
Major loss
Brings their wound present
Eric tells Liz that she’s not prepared for the shame and judgment that comes with being out
Liz tells Eric to stop being a pussy and she’s glad their lifestyle is now out there
Liz being shamed by her mom in front of the family
Michelle leaves the party with her husband in a room with another woman
Michelle tells Liz that this is all her fault and “whores like her are who ruin marriages.”
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What we learned doing this assignment was these mysteries and open loops were already built into our outline just by doing the work we’ve done so far. We were also surprised to see several mysteries presented because when we did the exercise on mysteries earlier in the process, we were stuck with nothing at the time. The impact these have had on the outline is two-fold. One, we are able to have some that are closed by the end of the pilot which gives some resolution but two, so many are still open for future episodes and seasons.
Main Mystery: Why is Liz so motivated to help people with sex and relationship advice?
Sub-Mysteries: why does Liz have these beliefs about monogamy, sex, and relationships?
Sub-Mysteries: how did Liz and Eric become swingers?
Sub-Mysteries: why does Maria treat Don and Liz so badly?
Sub-Mysteries: why is Liz and Teresa’s relationship so combative and competitive?
Sub-Mysteries: why is Liz so sensitive to being shamed and judged?
Sub-Mysteries: what’s the backstory of Liz and her dad’s relationship?
Sub-Mysteries: why is Liz’s dad still married to his mom if he’s trans?
Main Open Loop: what will happen to Liz and Eric now that their secret is out?
Sub-Open Loops: why is Eric miserable with his job?
Sub-Open Loops: why is Liz bothered after slamming the door on someone at the club?
Sub-Open Loops: why is Liz glad their lifestyle is now known?
Sub-Open Loops: who is the woman Liz and Eric are concerned about and why is she at the swinger club?
Sub-Open Loops: what happens now that Liz and Eric have been exposed?
Sub-Open Loops: what is going on with Michelle’s marriage?
Sub-Open Loops: will Michelle pursue swinging?
Sub-Open Loops: how will swinging affect Michelle’s marriage?
Sub-Open Loops: will Liz and Eric’s daughter Mary find out about their lifestyle?
Sub-Open Loops: what will happen when Eric finds out Liz deceived him?
Sub-Open Loops: Is this the end of Michelle’s marriage?
Sub-Open Loops: is this the end of Michelle and Liz’s friendship?
Sub-Open Loops: what will happen with Liz and Eric?
Sub-Open Loops: will Michelle ever find her happily ever after?
Sub-Open Loops: how will the decision to be public affect, Liz and Eric?
Sub-Open Loops: how will the decision to be public affect their daughter?
Sub-Open Loops: how will Liz deal with the shame and judgment as they are exposed more?
Sub-Open Loops: how will Liz deal with her family potentially knowing?
Sub-Open Loops: how will this affect Liz’s business?
Sub-Open Loops: how will this affect Eric’s job?
Sub-Open Loops: how will Eric get comfortable with the uncertainty?
Sub-Open Loops: how will the community react once they find out Liz is giving advice from the hair salon?
Sub-Open Loops: how does this affect Michelle since she co-owns the salon?
Sub-Open Loops: what is the significance of the relationship between Liz and her dad?
Sub-Open Loops: will Liz’s dad ever come out as trans?
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What we learned doing this assignment was that it’s relatively easy coming up with intrigue and in all different categories. We were actually surprised by how many possibilities we came up with for 1 pilot outline.
Teaser
Intriguing or dangerous parts of the sub-world: Swinger Club / Voyeurism: Liz’s Opening: a black guy bangs Liz from behind, then freeze frame on the action with her VO “how does a couple have this much passion after 15 years? By banging other people.” pan out to see the door is wide open as a bunch of people watch from inside the room and the doorway.
Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Liz’s POV, experience, expertise on the lifestyle and monogamy: Continue with Liz’s VO as she explains her beliefs on monogamy and relationships.
Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: she’s a stickler for the swinger code/rules: Liz’s Flaw: Anger: L TP 1: When a woman shows up in their doorway on her cell phone, Liz yells “no cell phones” and slams the door on her ending her and Eric’s night early (Eric never saw who the woman was).
Surface cover-up: Liz is having sex with her husband.
Disruption in Reality: Her voice-over plus pan out to see she’s having sex in a club with others including her husband watching.
Deeper Layer: Liz and Eric are experienced swingers.
Act 1
Why people are behaving this way: Eric Opening: As Liz and Eric walk out of the club, Liz looks bothered, Eric’s upset at Liz because once again she ruined his one night a week of fun Hidden Layer: (cause he’s miserable at his job and is always just working for the weekend). Accusation: Then, he calls Liz the “swinger police” Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Intriguing or dangerous parts of the sub-world: Liz defends herself by saying he’s the one constantly worried about being exposed and how quickly he forgets about a cell phone video of her that was illegally uploaded on a porn site that they had to get removed.
Why people are behaving this way: In mid-sentence, Liz tackles Eric at their car door. She then slowly peaks over her car to the parking lot and sees the same girl from the doorway on her cell phone pacing back and forth. Liz tells Eric to slowly peak too.
What is really happening / Intriguing or dangerous parts of the sub-world: He says too loudly “Michelle?” and Liz shushes him. Then, Liz tells him that’s why she slammed the door. Eric’s Major Conflict: Being exposed: Eric panics and wonders who Michelle is already telling on her cell phone. Liz’s coping mechanism. Liz wants to confront Michelle.
The major conflict/theme of the show: How fear prevents people from showing up in life how they’re meant to. Eric wants their lifestyle private but Liz wants to be very public: Eric’s Flaw: Playing life too safe: Eric’s Wound: Insecurity: Liz tells Eric to stop being a pussy and she’s glad it’s out there. This is who they are and should be able to live authentically without fear. Secrets: Liz & Eric have been swingers for 15 years but nobody knows.
Liz’s Wound: Eric tells Liz that she’s not ready for the shame and judgment that comes with being out. Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Eric is Liz’s protector: And, he needs to protect them and their daughter. Eric gets them in the car and peels away.
Surface cover-up: Liz slammed the door because someone was on her cell phone which is a violation of swinger club rules.
Disruption in Reality: On the way to their car, Liz tackles Eric and tells him to hush. He sees “Michelle” in the parking lot and Liz tells him that’s why she slammed the door.
Deeper Layer: Liz and Eric have been exposed.
Surface cover-up: Liz seems experienced, confident, and completely open about her lifestyle
Disruption in Reality: She tells Eric that she’s glad their lifestyle is finally out there
Deeper Layer: Liz and Eric have been swingers for 15 years and nobody knew.
Act 1 TP: Liz and Eric’s swinger lifestyle has been exposed by someone they know.
Act 2
Michelle Opening: A birthday party for Liz’s dad, Don. Michelle is there and it’s her birthday too. Why people are behaving this way: Liz’s Mom treats her dad badly (even on his birthday): Liz’s mom, Maria brings out the cake and the icing reads “Happy Birthday Michelle (and Don) Character secret identity: Hidden relationship history: Michelle is Liz’s childhood best friend and like a sister to her.
Character history: Maria & Don: Maria shames Don and hints at sinning. We get that she’s religious. Character history: Maria & Liz / Don & Liz: Liz quips back to defend her dad and Maria snaps back at her.
Maria planned to show old family movies as a gift to Don but it ends up being another way to shame him and Liz (Liz’s Wound) while praising her sister Teresa. (Character history: Maria & Teresa) (Character history: Liz & Teresa). A huge family fight breaks out. Liz storms off to the bathroom (Liz’s flaw: anger). Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Eric is Liz’s protector: Eric throws shade at Maria for hurting Liz.
Michelle chases after Liz and goes into the bathroom with her. Liz tells her “you didn’t think it’d be a good idea to call me first before coming here.” Michelle “I didn’t know what to do.” A knock on the door. It’s Eric. Now, all 3 are in the bathroom. Michelle promises Eric and Liz that their secret is safe with her. Accusation: Eric accuses Michelle of already telling someone. She says “I didn’t tell anyone, I was on with my husband telling him I saw you and Liz at the swing club.” Eric’s Fear: Uncertainty & being exposed: Eric: “that’s telling someone, see, she doesn’t even know when she’s doing it, now 2 people know, 2 become 4, 4 become 1,000” E TP 1: Eric gets Liz and Michelle to promise this is squashed now so they aren’t exposed further. Conspiracy: Teresa knocks on the door and wants to know why Eric, Liz, and Michelle are all in there together. Michelle says “we aren’t having a threesome,” Liz Flaw: Anger: Liz says “we are having a threesome Teresa, fuck off” Eric gives Liz and Michelle a death stare.
Hidden relationship history Liz and Michelle also co-own the hair salon together: Liz heads to work at her hair salon. Michelle is already there getting ready for work.
Michelle can’t believe Liz kept this from her. Liz tells Michelle she’s sorry but she kept it quiet for Eric and her family.
Liz asks why she was at the club anyhow (and by herself). Deception/Secret: M TP 1: Michelle tells Liz she was at the club to try and spice up her marriage.
M Dilemma: If she doesn’t pursue swinging, her marriage will probably fail. If she does start swinging just to appease her husband, her marriage will probably fail.
M Midpoint: Michelle tells Liz that she’s going to pursue swinging with or without her help and that she got the idea from Swinger TikTok. Liz’s Flaw: anger Liz goes ballistic when Michelle tells her she’s taking advice from TikTok “sexperts” and can’t believe how many followers they have. Liz’s fear: regret, Liz’s need/goal: to be a sexpert. Liz tells Michelle something specific that the TikToker is full of shit on and she realizes how many people need her help. Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Liz’s POV, experience, and expertise on the lifestyle.
L Pilot Dilemma: Liz can decide not to help Michelle and watch her friend fail miserably or at least try and help her navigate a world that she’s an expert in even though she knows she’ll still probably fail miserably.
Intriguing or dangerous parts of the sub-world: Michelle tells Liz they’ve already met a woman online to have a threesome with. Liz questions if Michelle is even into women. Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Liz’s POV, experience, expertise on the lifestyle: Then, gives her the advice to definitely not invite her to their home or even do anything in private. Go somewhere public (crazy single chicks). Liz says she’ll figure out a plan to help her.
Surface cover-up: Who is Michelle?
Disruption in Reality: At her Dad’s birthday party with her family all there, so is Michelle and they are celebrating her birthday too.
Deeper Layer: Michelle is Liz’s childhood best friend and is like a sister to her. She also co-owns the hair salon with her.
Act 2 TP / Midpoint: Liz has to help Michelle with swinging
Act 3
L Midpoint: Conspiracy/Hidden Agenda: Liz is going to help Michelle with swinging behind Eric’s back. Liz suggests to Eric that she go to a house party alone so she can send him a video of her being naughty without him. He agrees and is excited about it. But, it’s really a coverup to help Michelle.
Deception: Liz’s daughter Mary questions where Liz is going without Eric at night, she lies to her. Liz tells Eric a mutual friend (from the lifestyle) is picking her up for the house party, but it’s really Michelle and her husband. Liz tells Michelle Eric is fine with her plan
Intriguing or dangerous parts of the sub-world: House party: House party, the living room is wall-to-wall air mattresses, people having sex all over. Michelle is shell-shocked. Liz gets them upstairs to a private room with the girl who came with them. Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Liz’s POV, experience, expertise on the lifestyle and monogamy and she’s a stickler for the swinger code/rule: Meanwhile, we see more of Liz’s bossiness in the lifestyle as a parade of single guys come up to hit on her.
Michelle gets so nervous, runs out of the room, and vomits in the hallway ruining her first swinger experience.
Liz’s flaw: anger and coping mechanism: confrontation: Liz bangs on the door to confront Michelle’s husband, but Michelle tells her she’s obviously not worth it to him and she just wants to go home Michelle’s wound: unworthy of love
M Major Conflict: Outside, Michelle cries and Liz tries to comfort her. Accusation: Michelle tells her that this is all her fault and “whores like her are who ruin marriages.” Liz’s Wound: Shame & Judgment: Liz goes off on her telling her that she is so blinded by wanting some fairy tale relationship that she doesn’t see her marriage is irreparable. Liz’s Flaw: Anger Michelle’s Fear: Loneliness: M TP 2: Michelle leaves the house party without Liz or her husband.
L TP 2: Liz shakes in anger as she calls Eric to pick her up and he now finds out about her deception.
Intriguing World: While Liz waits for Eric to arrive, she rushes back into the house. One of the creeper single guys is in the corner alone. She bends over and lifts her dress revealing her ass. “You can cum on my ass. No touching.” Then, she throws her phone at him. And film it.
E Midpoint: Eric arrives to pick Liz up from the house party and is pissed. Eric’s Coping Mechanism: Withdrawal: He gives Liz the silent treatment.
Surface cover-up: Liz tells Eric she wants to go to the house party alone so she can send him a naughty video and that a mutual friend is picking her up.
Disruption in Reality: Michelle, her husband, and the girl they want to hook up with pick her up.
Deeper Layer: Liz helps Michelle behind Eric’s back.
Act 3 TP: Liz has failed both Michelle and Eric
Act 4
At the hair salon, Liz and Michelle stand in awkward silence. Liz’s Flaw: anger: Liz speaks first “this is the first and only pass I ever give you, if you ever shame me like that again, I’ll rip your fucking head off.” Liz’s Wound: Shame & Judgment. Michelle starts balling. Deception: Michelle: “I lied to you. I wasn’t considering swinging to spice up my marriage, it was to save my marriage.
Deception: Michelle spills all the tea. That her husband gave her an ultimatum, that they try swinging or their marriage is over. That he met this woman online himself, not together. Liz’s Flaw: anger: Liz tells her “so you fucking used me”. Intriguing or dangerous parts of the sub-world: Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Liz’s POV, experience, expertise on the lifestyle and monogamy and she’s a stickler for the swinger code/rules: This isn’t some game to me, this is my lifestyle. You’re doing this for the wrong reasons and there’s no going back. Having your husband bang some chick while you leave crying isn’t swinging. Michelle: he told me that he didn’t have sex with her, he blamed me for leaving him at the party. Liz’s Flaw: anger: Liz: Oh my god, I’m going to neuter him. He not only banged her after you left but he’s been banging her. Wake the fuck up. Michelle cries again. Michelle: he said that he went to church first thing this morning and will go to marriage counseling. Liz’s Wound: Liz loses her shit…”People will judge me for what I do, but you’re going to stay with a man who will keep cheating on you while you pretend he’s some prince charming.” Michelle’s wound: unworthy of love: Michelle’s fear: Loneliness: Michelle: I can’t fail, who is going to love me?
M Ending: She decides to stay with her husband and work it out.
L Major Conflict/Series Dilemma: Liz tells Eric she’s going to keep helping people because she feels alive for the first time with this secret off her chest, but the more she pushes, the potential exposure can negatively affect her husband and daughter plus she would have to deal with being judged and shamed by family and society. If she doesn’t pursue this, though, she will be full of regret and resentment.
E Major Conflict: Eric wants their lifestyle private but Liz wants to be very public. Eric wants Liz to forget about helping people, and he gets this is something she needs to do but tries to get her to see that neither one of them may be prepared for how more potential exposure will negatively impact their lives. Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Eric is Liz’s protector. He teases her that helping Michelle couldn’t have been more of an epic failure so how does this make her want to keep doing it. Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Liz’s POV, experience, expertise on the lifestyle: Liz tells him about another TikToker who has a million followers and the latest absurd advice they were giving.
E Dilemma: If Liz continues to help people, they risk being further exposed and it may negatively impact his marriage (and life), but if he gets his wish and she shuts it down, she may resent him and that could also negatively affect his marriage (and life).
E TP 2: Eric agrees to let Liz continue helping people from the hair salon if she keeps it on the down low.
E Ending: Eric’s fear: uncertainty: Eric has to trust Liz while getting used to being comfortable with the uncomfortable (and the unknown).
Unique purpose/expertise of a lead character: Liz’s POV, experience, expertise on the lifestyle: Intrigue: L Ending: Liz gives a random woman advice at her hair salon and a sexpert is born!
Act 4 TP / Lock In: Liz is now going to help others with sex and relationship advice from her hair salon and a sexpert is born!
Surface cover-up: Michelle wanted Liz’s help with swinging to spice up her marriage.
Disruption in Reality: Michelle’s husband met the woman he wanted them to have a threesome with by himself and was already cheating on Michelle with her.
Deeper Layer: Liz finds out it was to save Michelle’s marriage.
Act 5/TAG
Intrigue: After hours at her hair salon, Liz helps her dad style his wig for a night out. She asks him where he’s going. He responds “nowhere you’ll be, as promised.”
Surface cover-up: Liz’s dad seemed like any normal middle-aged husband.
Disruption in Reality: Liz’s dad shows up at her hair salon after hours so she can style his wig for a night out.
Deeper Layer: Liz’s dad is secretly trans.
Surface cover-up: Michelle was the first one to find out about Liz and Eric’s secret.
Disruption in Reality: Liz asks where he’s going tonight and he replies “nowhere you’ll be as promised.”
Deeper Layer: Liz’s dad has known about Liz and Eric’s secret all along.
Act 5 TP: Liz’s dad is secretly trans and knew about Liz and Eric’s lifestyle. -
What we learned doing this assignment was coming up with layers wasn’t as difficult as we thought but revealing them in an interesting way without characters just telling each other through dialogue is the challenge. We still have some work to do there. Also, even though some reveals aren’t huge things, we felt maybe we had too many and aren’t leaving enough open loops.
Teaser
Essence: (Liz Opening) – Liz’s VO while she’s having sex with someone in the swinger club with the door open while a bunch of people including her husband watch. We get her POV and expertise about the lifestyle.
(L TP 1): When a woman shows up in their doorway on her phone, Liz yells “no phones” and slams the door on her ending her and Eric’s night early (Eric never saw who the woman was).
Surface cover up 1: Liz slams the door on a watcher at the club because she was on her cell phone which is a violation of the rules.
Surface cover up 2: Liz seems experienced and unashamed about her lifestyle
Act 1
Essence: On the way out of the club walking toward the parking lot, Eric and Liz argue about her ruining the night (again) because she always has to be the swinger police. Then, Eric finds out who was at their door and he panics.
(Eric Opening) – he’s upset at Liz because once again she ruined his one night a week of fun (cause he’s miserable at his job and is always just working for the weekend).
Liz defends herself as we see that she’s a stickler for the swinger code/rules and knows her shit.
Turning Point: Eric finds out it was “Michelle” standing at their door.
Disruption in Reality / Reveal 1: In the parking lot, Liz tells Eric “don’t look now but to your right, look who it is. She was the one standing in our doorway and why I slammed the door” Of course, Eric does look now and sees it’s Michelle on her cell phone. He panics. “And she’s on her cell phone, who is she telling already?” Liz wants to confront, Eric tells her to get in the car and he peels away.
Deeper Layer 1: Michelle is the last person Eric wanted to know their secret.
Disruption in Reality 2: Michelle now knows their secret
Surface cover up 3: Who exactly is Michelle?
Act 2
Essence: Liz and Eric are in their normal world, a birthday party for her dad where we see how problematic the exposure of their lifestyle can be for them. Michelle is also at the party as she is considered family too.
Disruption in Reality 3: Michelle is at Liz’s dad’s birthday party
Deeper Layer 2 / Reveal 2: Despite Liz’s attitude toward being a swinger, Michelle is the first to know about Eric and Liz’s secret in 15 years of being in the lifestyle and Liz keeps it secret because of Eric.
Deeper Layer 3 / Reveal 3: Michelle is Liz’s best friend from childhood who is considered family and a complete blabber mouth/gossiper.
Surface cover up 4: Why is Liz’s mom so shitty to Liz and her dad at the party?
(E TP 1): Eric tells Liz and Michelle this needs to be squashed now so they aren’t exposed further.
(Michelle Opening): She promises Eric and Liz that their secret is safe with her. Then when Liz’s sister Teresa catches them all in the bathroom, Michelle tells her “don’t worry, we aren’t having a threesome or anything”
Then, Liz heads to work at her hair salon….
Surface cover up 5: Michelle is Liz’s childhood best friend
Disruption in Reality 5: Michelle is at the hair salon when Liz shows up for work
Deeper Layer / Reveal 5: Michelle is also co-owner of the hair salon with Liz
Surface cover up 6: Michelle tells Liz and Eric she was at the club to try and spice up her marriage.
(M TP 1): Michelle tells Liz that she is considering swinging to save her marriage.
(M Dilemma): If she doesn’t pursue swinging, her marriage will probably fail. If she does start swinging just to appease her husband, her marriage will probably fail.
Liz tells her that’s a recipe for disaster because that’s not going to fix a marriage already on the rocks.
(M Midpoint): She convinces Liz to help her and her husband have their first swinger experience by telling her that she’s going to do this without or without her.
(L Dilemma): Liz can decide not to help Michelle and watch her friend fail miserably or at least try and help her navigate a world that she’s an expert in even though she knows she’ll still probably fail miserably.
Turning Point/Midpoint: Liz decides to help Michelle with her first swinger experience.
Act 3
Essence: Liz comes up with a plan to help Michelle without Eric knowing.
(L Midpoint): Liz devises a plan to take Michelle and her husband to a house party so they can have their first swinger experience.
Turning Point: She convinces Eric that she should go to this house party without him so she can have a naughty experience and send him the video of it. He agrees.
Surface cover up 7: Liz suggests to Eric that she should attend a house party by herself so she can send him a naughty video of her in action. She tells him a mutual friend in the lifestyle is picking her up so she’ll be safe. He agrees.
Disruption in Reality 7: It’s actually Michelle and her husband who pick her up.
Deeper Layer / Reveal 7: Liz is going to help Michelle with her first swinger experience behind Eric’s back.
Surface cover up 8: Liz tells Michelle Eric is fine with her plan
Act 4
Essence: Liz’s plan fails, and Eric finds out, but Liz feels that she’s found her purpose.
(M TP 2): Michelle bails on her first swinger experience.
(M Major Conflict): Michelle leaves the house party but her husband stays.
Disruption in Reality 6: Michelle comes clean to Liz that she wasn’t doing this to spice up her marriage but to save it.
Deeper Layer / Reveal 6: Michelle’s husband gave her an ultimatum that they try swinging or their marriage is over.
(L TP 2): Liz has to call Eric for help and he finds out about her secret plan.
Disruption in Reality / Reveal 8: When Liz has to call Eric for help after rushing Michelle out of the house party, she realizes that she didn’t get Eric his video as promised. She has to go back in and tells Michelle what’s going on.
Deeper Layer 8: Liz lied to Michelle about Eric being Ok with their plan
(E Midpoint): Eric has to bail Liz out and is pissed that she helped Michelle behind his back.
(E Major Conflict): Eric wants Liz to forget about helping people, but this is something she needs to do.
Liz and Eric have a heart-to-heart where she explains to him her ambition and how she doesn’t want to live with regrets or resent him. He understands but tries to get her to see that neither one of them may be prepared for how more potential exposure will negatively impact their lives.
Surface cover up 9 : Liz is motivated to help Michelle because she’s her friend in need
Disruption in Reality 9: Eric confronts her about helping Michelle
Deeper Layer / Reveal 9: Liz tells him she needs to help because she was never able to help her dad and she can’t live with regret and resentment like he has.
(L Major Conflict): Liz feels alive for the first time with this secret off her chest and able to help others, but the more she pushes, the potential exposure can negatively affect her husband and daughter plus she would have to deal with being judged and shamed by family and society. If she doesn’t pursue this, though, she will be full of regret and resentment.
(E Dilemma): If Liz continues to help people, they risk being further exposed and it may negatively impact his marriage (and life), but if he gets his wish and she shuts it down, she may resent him and that could also negatively affect his marriage (and life).
(E TP 2): Eric agrees to let Liz continue helping people from the hair salon if she keeps it on the down low.
(M Ending): Michelle buys her husband’s explanation that he didn’t know where she went and thought she was coming back, then he made her feel guilty for leaving without him.
(L Ending): Liz gives a random woman advice at her hair salon and a sexpert is born!
(E Ending): Eric has to trust Liz while getting used to being comfortable with the uncomfortable (and the unknown).
Lock In/Turning Point: In helping Michelle, Liz feels like she’s finally living her truth and purpose so she is now going to help others with sex and relationship advice using her hair salon as a front.
Act 5/Tag
Essence: After hours at her hair salon, Liz helps her dad style his wig for a night out.
Turning Point: Liz’s dad is secretly trans.
Disruption in Reality 4: Liz’s dad visits her salon to get his wig styled
Deeper Layer / Reveal 4: Liz’s dad is a closeted trans and Liz is the only one who knows and tries to help him. Her mom resents both of them.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by Dave Arena.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by
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What we learned doing this assignment is that the process of making sure the character’s storylines wove into the plot of the pilot really tightened things up and brought it all together. For the first time, it seems like everything is working from a story and character arc perspective and now we can just enhance it by adding layers and intrigue. We are pretty excited after completing this.
Liz
Beginning: Liz’s VO while she’s having sex with someone in the swinger club with the door open while a bunch of people including her husband watch. We get her POV and expertise about the lifestyle.
Turning Point 1: When a woman shows up in their doorway on her phone, Liz yells “no phones” and slams the door on her ending her and Eric’s night early (Eric never saw who the woman was).
Midpoint: Liz devises a plan to take Michelle and her husband to a house party so they can have their first swinger experience.
Turning Point 2: Liz has to call Eric for help and he finds out about her secret plan.
Major Conflict: Liz feels alive for the first time with this secret off her chest and able to help others, but the more she pushes, the potential exposure can negatively affect her husband and daughter plus she would have to deal with being judged and shamed by family and society. If she doesn’t pursue this, though, she will be full of regret and resentment.
Dilemma: Liz can decide not to help Michelle and watch her friend fail miserably or at least try and help her navigate a world that she’s an expert in even though she knows she’ll still probably fail miserably.
Ending: Liz gives a random woman advice at her hair salon and a sexpert is born!
Eric
Beginning: he’s upset at Liz because once again she ruined his one night a week of fun (cause he’s miserable at his job and is always just working for the weekend)
Turning Point 1: Eric tells Liz and Michelle this needs to be squashed now so they aren’t exposed further.
Midpoint: Eric has to bail Liz out and is pissed that she helped Michelle behind his back.
Turning Point 2: Eric agrees to let Liz continue helping people from the hair salon if she keeps it on the down low.
Major Conflict: Eric wants Liz to forget about helping people, but this is something she needs to do.
Dilemma: If Liz continues to help people, they risk being further exposed and it may negatively impact his marriage (and life), but if he gets his wish and she shuts it down, she may resent him and that could also negatively affect his marriage (and life).
Ending: Eric has to trust Liz while getting used to being comfortable with the uncomfortable (and the unknown).
Michelle
Beginning: She promises Eric and Liz that their secret is safe with her.
Turning Point 1: Michelle tells Liz that she is considering swinging to save her marriage.
Midpoint: She convinces Liz to help her and her husband have their first swinger experience by telling her that she’s going to do this without or without her.
Turning Point 2: Michelle bails on her first swinger experience.
Major Conflict: Michelle leaves the house party but her husband stays.
Dilemma: If she doesn’t pursue swinging, her marriage will probably fail. If she does start swinging just to appease her husband, her marriage will probably fail.
Ending: Michelle buys her husband’s explanation that he didn’t know where she went and thought she was coming back, then blamed her for leaving without him.
OUTLINE:
Teaser
Essence: (Liz Opening) – Liz’s VO while she’s having sex with someone in the swinger club with the door open while a bunch of people including her husband watch. We get her POV and expertise about the lifestyle.
(L TP 1): When a woman shows up in their doorway on her phone, Liz yells “no phones” and slams the door on her ending her and Eric’s night early (Eric never saw who the woman was).
Act 1
Essence: In the car on the way home, Eric and Liz argue about her ruining the night (again) because she always has to be the swinger police. Then, Liz tells him who was at their door and he panics.
(Eric Opening) – he’s upset at Liz because once again she ruined his one night a week of fun (cause he’s miserable at his job and is always just working for the weekend).
Liz defends herself as we see that she’s a stickler for the swinger code/rules and knows her shit.
Turning Point: Liz tells Eric that she slammed the door because it was her best friend Michelle standing there.
Act 2
Essence: Liz and Eric are in their normal world, a birthday party for her dad where we see how problematic the exposure of their lifestyle can be for them. Michelle is also at the party as she is considered family too.
(E TP 1): Eric tells Liz and Michelle this needs to be squashed now so they aren’t exposed further.
(Michelle Opening): She promises Eric and Liz that their secret is safe with her.
Then, at her hair salon with Michelle…
(M TP 1): Michelle tells Liz that she is considering swinging to save her marriage.
(M Dilemma): If she doesn’t pursue swinging, her marriage will probably fail. If she does start swinging just to appease her husband, her marriage will probably fail.
Liz tells her that’s a recipe for disaster because that’s not going to fix a marriage already on the rocks.
(M Midpoint): She convinces Liz to help her and her husband have their first swinger experience by telling her that she’s going to do this without or without her.
(L Dilemma): Liz can decide not to help Michelle and watch her friend fail miserably or at least try and help her navigate a world that she’s an expert in even though she knows she’ll still probably fail miserably.
Turning Point/Midpoint: Liz decides to help Michelle with her first swinger experience.
Act 3
Essence: Liz comes up with a plan to help Michelle without Eric knowing.
(L Midpoint): Liz devises a plan to take Michelle and her husband to a house party so they can have their first swinger experience.
Turning Point: She convinces Eric that she should go to this house party without him so she can have a naughty experience and send him the video of it. He agrees.
Act 4
Essence: Liz’s plan fails, and Eric finds out, but Liz feels that she’s found her purpose.
(M TP 2): Michelle bails on her first swinger experience.
(M Major Conflict): Michelle leaves the house party but her husband stays.
(L TP 2): Liz has to call Eric for help and he finds out about her secret plan.
(E Midpoint): Eric has to bail Liz out and is pissed that she helped Michelle behind his back.
(E Major Conflict): Eric wants Liz to forget about helping people, but this is something she needs to do.
Liz and Eric have a heart-to-heart where she explains to him her ambition and how she doesn’t want to live with regrets or resent him. He understands but tries to get her to see that neither one of them may be prepared for how more potential exposure will negatively impact their lives.
(L Major Conflict): Liz feels alive for the first time with this secret off her chest and able to help others, but the more she pushes, the potential exposure can negatively affect her husband and daughter plus she would have to deal with being judged and shamed by family and society. If she doesn’t pursue this, though, she will be full of regret and resentment.
(E Dilemma): If Liz continues to help people, they risk being further exposed and it may negatively impact his marriage (and life), but if he gets his wish and she shuts it down, she may resent him and that could also negatively affect his marriage (and life).
(E TP 2): Eric agrees to let Liz continue helping people from the hair salon if she keeps it on the down low.
(M Ending): Michelle buys her husband’s explanation that he didn’t know where she went and thought she was coming back, then blamed her for leaving without him.
(L Ending): Liz gives a random woman advice at her hair salon and a sexpert is born!
(E Ending): Eric has to trust Liz while getting used to being comfortable with the uncomfortable (and the unknown).
Lock In/Turning Point: In helping Michelle, Liz feels like she’s finally living her truth and purpose so she is now going to help others with sex and relationship advice using her hair salon as a front.
Act 5/Tag
Essence: After hours at her hair salon, Liz helps her dad style his wig for a night out.
Turning Point: Liz’s dad is secretly trans.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by Dave Arena.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by Dave Arena.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by
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What we learned doing this assignment is that we always thought of comedy scripts having 3 acts with also maybe having a cold open/teaser and a tag. So, we aren’t sure if we did this right or not. It did seem actually easier to break this down into even smaller chunks with more act breaks/turning points. We used the 4th act as our lock-in because Liz’s decision to help others with sex and relationship advice using her hair salon as a cover is the series. The 5th act became the tag which shows a bit more of her motivation and also we felt it was a strong cliffhanger to make the audience want to watch episode 2. Can anyone give us advice on whether this seems to be structured OK or should we revise it?
Teaser:
Essence: Liz’s VO on why swinging leads to a happy marriage while she’s having sex with someone in the swinger club while a bunch of people including her husband watch. Then, when a woman shows up in the doorway, Liz slams the door on her.
Turning Point: The woman was Liz’s childhood best friend who literally knows everything about her except that she’s been a swinger for 15 years.
Act 1:
Essence: Liz and Eric have to devise a plan to cover this up or do damage control on the potential exposure.
Turning Point: Liz admits to Eric that she is relieved that they are outed.
Act 2:
Essence: We meet Liz’s family where we realize how problematic this exposure can be for Liz and Eric.
Turning Point/Midpoint: Liz tells Eric that she wants to be out about their lifestyle cause she can’t live inauthentically anymore and doesn’t want to die with regrets.
Act 3:
Essence: Liz decides to help Michelle with her first swinger experience but it fails miserably.
Turning Point: Eric finds out about Liz helping Michelle and goes ballistic.
Act 4:
Essence: Liz reads a situation in a coffee shop and invites a woman to her hair salon for sex advice.
Lock In: In helping Michelle, Liz feels like she’s living her truth and purpose so she is now going to help others with sex and relationship advice using her hair salon as a front.
Act 5/Tag:
Essence: After the hair salon closes, Liz’s dad comes in to get his wig styled by Liz.
Turning Point: We understand that Liz’s motivation for helping others is because her dad is trans.
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What we learned doing this assignment is that this formula made it really easy for us to think about what our pilot needed to accomplish and then from there, we already have a good idea of the beginning, middle, and end.
1. What is the “Inciting Incident” of your series that this pilot needs to deliver powerfully?
After 15 years of being secret swingers, Liz and Eric are outed.
2. Give us the main beats of that Inciting Incident:
Intriguing Concept: After her best friend finds out that she’s been a secret swinger for over 15 years, Liz finally feels like she’s living authentically and starts using her hair salon as a front to give sex and relationship advice behind her husband’s back.
Act 1: Liz and Eric are a lot like most other couples. They have a teen daughter. Liz owns a hair salon, Eric is miserable in the corporate rat race. Liz is the black sheep of her family. Most people consider their marriage “couple goals” but nobody knows they’ve been swingers for 15 years.
Midpoint: Then, we see that Liz is actually a badass in the swinger lifestyle. She knows what makes this work and what blows up relationships. When Liz’s best friend Michelle tells her she’s considering swinging to help save her marriage, it puts Liz in a major dilemma but she decides not to tell her secret thinking Michelle won’t go through with it.
Lock In: When Michelle shows up at the local swing club and is about to make a big mistake, Liz decides to help her and outs herself and Eric in the process. But, now, she feels alive with this off her chest and wants to keep helping people even though her husband Eric wants nothing to do with this being public.
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What we learned doing this assignment is that it’s getting a bit easier to fill in the blanks on this stuff because of all the work we’ve already done.
SERIES INFO:
World: The swinger lifestyle
Main mystery: How is Liz going to accomplish her goal when her husband doesn’t even want to be public?
Impossible Goal: Liz wants to be a celebrity sexpert but nobody even knows she’s been a swinger for 15 years
Main Conflict: Liz has to deal with her husband, family, and society opposing/judging/shaming her but her biggest fear is dying with the regret that she never lived her truth
Second Mystery: Sexuality of Liz’s dad and how Liz’s beliefs were formed
Season 1 Arc: Liz goes from secret swinger to helping others with sex & relationships
Season 1 Protagonist Internal Journey: Liz goes from feeling suppressed to living authentically
PILOT INFO:
Pilot Conflict: When Liz’s best friend Michelle suggests swinging to save her marriage, Liz needs to decide to keep her secret and let Michelle fail on her own, or help her while outing herself and her husband Eric.
Characters Introduced: Liz, Eric, Michelle, Mary (Liz and Eric’s daughter), Liz’s parents, Teresa (Liz’s younger sister)
Inciting Incident of Season 1: When Michelle shows up unexpectedly at the swinger club while Liz and Eric are there, Liz helps Michelle without Eric knowing just before Michelle was about to make a big mistake
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What we learned doing this assignment is it’s more difficult than we thought to find photos that represent the show as we visualize it. But, after looking at the Rock Dad sample and listening to the interview, we see how it can elevate the entire bible and really give execs a feel for the tone.
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What we learned doing this assignment is to make this so clear and concise but also looking through the lens of making each line intriguing made us really edit most lines and we were able to cut many lines that weren’t interesting or just fluff. This elevated the entire bible.
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What we learned during this assignment was that it’s worth thinking more about the titles so that they are intriguing and stand out. We considered the episode titles more of an afterthought but again every line, every word matters!
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What we learned doing this assignment was there is a lot of fluff and filler still in our bible. Going through line by line is tedious but necessary. We still have work to do on our bible but it’s becoming way more focused and intriguing.
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What we learned during this assignment is to continue trusting the process. This allowed us to get laser-focused on what we actually wanted to say without the fluff. We started with the concept and world portions and now will move on to editing the show summary, character descriptions, and episodes next.
Title
Couple GoalsGenre/Format
30 Minute ComedyConcept
When a veteran but closeted swinger outs herself to help save her best friend’s marriage, she starts living authentically and finds her purpose using her hair salon as a front for swinging advice without her husband knowing.
Overview / World / Tone
The real and raw, NOT “Eyes Wide Shut” version of the swinger lifestyle and what either makes for a fulfilling relationship or blows it the fuck up.
We will also explore polyamory, quads, polyfidelity, BDSM, open and monogamish, and even traditional monogamous relationships to show why they fail more often than not.
The show will comically question and shake up societal norms and belief systems, especially around silly religious dogma, and show how to live your truth without fear or judgment from others specifically as it relates to sex and sexuality.
In our personal experience, swinging specifically is the most natural way for humans to have a successful long-term relationship and when done right increases trust, connection, and communication while still allowing a person to maintain freedom as an individual.
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What we learned doing this assignment is that just getting a rough draft done and not making it perfect worked well. Once we slept on what we created, we realized the entire season of episodes wasn’t the story we wanted to tell so with that said, we changed all of the episode descriptions:
Episode 1
Liz and Eric have a relationship most consider “couple goals” but nobody knows they’ve been secretly swingers for over 14 years. When Liz’s best friend Michelle tells her that she’s considering swinging to help her marriage, it puts Liz in a dilemma. Does she warn Michelle that this is probably not a good idea for a marriage already on the rocks and out her and Eric in the process or keep her mouth shut and let Michelle get hurt on her own? Liz investigates if Michelle is going to the club they frequent. When she does show up, Liz spies on her without Eric knowing. When Liz sees Michelle about to make a huge mistake, she has to out herself to save her.
Episode 2
Liz, now feeling the weight of her secret off her chest and loving that she can talk to her best friend about this openly, agrees to show Michelle the ropes of swinging if she doesn’t tell Eric. Liz helps Michelle set up a profile on a swinger website where she meets another newbie couple that she’s interested in and brings the female half to the salon for Liz’s advice. Liz devises a plan to bring them to a house party for their first encounter. She convinces Eric to let her go to the party alone and promises to send a video of her naughtiness. Eric is excited by this suggestion but has no idea what Liz is really up to. Just before things are about to go down, Michelle vomits all over the male half of the couple ruining their first potential swap.
Episode 3
Michelle is embarrassed by their first swinger attempt and her husband is pissed off at her for ruining it because he was really into the other woman and wanted this to happen. Liz admits it was her fault for taking them to a house party, which was a little too much for their first time. She suggests they slow things down and invite the couple to dinner so they can get to know them a bit more privately. But, when Michelle asks Liz to go with her to help feel things out, she has to take Eric which makes for an awkward dinner with everyone trying to keep it on the down low. However, the plan works as Michelle successfully has her first swinger experience.
Episode 4
Michelle tells Liz that her marriage and sex life are the best they’ve ever been which makes Liz feel cautiously optimistic that she’s actually helped them. When a woman walks into their hair salon looking for Liz’s advice, Michelle admits she “referred” her. Liz connects with this woman and feels like she has a strong relationship that would benefit from swinging which makes Michelle a bit jealous. Once the woman leaves, Liz is pissed at Michelle and lets her know that she’s afraid her inability to keep her mouth shut will get her exposed. Liz and Eric get together with the woman from the salon and her husband. Even though Eric can’t know how this came to be, Liz feels a little less guilty throwing him a bone.
Episode 5
Liz visits Michelle’s house after she calls her in a panic. When Liz arrives, she finds Michelle and the dude from the couple they hooked up with. Michelle explains that they’ve decided to swap partners and living arrangements for two weeks but that’s not what she really wants. Liz warns them that this is going to blow up in their faces and is not what swinging is about. Liz confronts Michelle’s husband but fails to convince him to come home. Michelle ends up on Liz and Eric’s doorstep with packed bags in hand.
Episode 6
After leaving the husband of the other couple in her house alone, Michelle moves in with Liz and Eric. Liz tells Eric she is there temporarily because her marriage is going through some hard times. But, when Michelle sees a video on social media of her husband living his best life with the other woman, she once again can’t help herself from verbally vomiting everything. Now, Eric finds out that not only has Liz been deceiving him but has also outed them to the one person who can’t keep her trap shut. Liz asks Eric to help and he convinces Michelle’s husband to go back home, but then gives Liz the silent treatment which drives her bat shit crazy.Episode 7
When Liz’s dad is diagnosed with cancer and given less than 2 years to live, Liz has a heart-to-heart with him while she styles his wig. He is secretly trans and bi-sexual but has always been afraid to walk his truth and stays miserably married to her mom. Liz is the only one who knows his secret and he’s the only one who knew hers as they formed a pact early on so that they never accidentally ran into each other at a club or party. Liz and Eric reconcile and while he understands her need to live authentically because of her dad, he doesn’t think she is truly ready for all of the potential negative consequences and wounds this may open up.
Episode 8
Liz compromises with Eric and lets him know that being open with Michelle at least has helped her and maybe that’s all she needs right now. But, at a family get-together when Michelle accidentally spills the beans to Liz’s strict Catholic mother and judgmental perfect sister, it opens up the can of worms Eric has most feared for him and Liz.
This means we also need to modify the season 1 and 2 summaries a bit, but we are going to do that once we edit the bible.
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What we learned from this assignment is that it was much easier to at least get a rough draft of the opening summary done because we had all of the information. However, we still feel it’s a bit too wordy and detailed. We are hoping the process of making it intriguing will help us edit it down.
Couple Goals
30 Minute Comedy
Liz Kane has a relationship many consider “couple goals”, but nobody knows that her secret to a happy marriage is being a swinger for over 14 years. But, she’s tired of hiding her lifestyle just like her trans dad, who is still miserably married to her mom.
This all changes when Liz’s childhood best friend, Michelle, spots her at the local swinger club where Liz reluctantly agrees to help her navigate the lifestyle to save her marriage. Liz’s husband, Eric, didn’t see Michelle so Liz asks for her silence in exchange as he is cozy in the swinger’s closet.
After helping Michelle, Liz now feels like she’s found her purpose and helps others with sex and relationship advice using her hair salon as a front.
Unfortunately, Liz’s instincts (and experience) prove right after Michelle suspects her husband is cheating with the couple Liz hooked them up with. Even after Liz devises a plan and catches him red-handed, Michelle buys her husband’s excuses. Eric, who stumbles upon Liz’s secret plan thinks she is cheating on him so Liz has to come clean, but conveniently leaves out the part about helping other swingers.
When Michelle awkwardly tries to make a 4-some happen with Liz and Eric at the club, Liz finally goes off and tells Michelle to stop because her marriage is irreparable. Michelle, crushed, tries to seduce Eric in retaliation but he refuses. Then, Michelle tells him everything Liz has been up to.
Liz and Eric have a huge fight where Liz tries to explain that she finally feels like she’s living authentically and helping others fills the void of never being able to help her dad. Eric understands but is not ready to have this out there and wants to protect them. Eric ends up leaving Liz.
How do two people move on when you can’t put the genie back in the bottle and they want completely different things? And, will it get even worse with more people finding out about their secret life?
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What we learned during this assignment was for the most part this seemed easier than coming up with the episode ideas because we already had most of the information fleshed out. It did reveal that some episodes are more robust than others which gives us a bit more to think about to beef up the lighter episodes.
Episode 1
Liz and Eric have a relationship most consider “couple goals” but nobody knows they’ve been secretly swingers for over 14 years. When Liz’s best friend Michelle tells her that she’s considering swinging to help save her marriage, it puts Liz in a dilemma. Does she warn Michelle that this is probably not a good idea for a marriage already on the rocks and out her and Eric in the process or keep her mouth shut and let Michelle get hurt? Liz investigates if Michelle is going to the club they frequent. When she does show up, Liz tries to hide her and Eric but eventually, she is found out without Eric knowing.
Episode 2
Liz agrees to show Michelle the ropes of swinging if she doesn’t tell Eric. Michelle meets another newbie couple online that she’s interested in and brings the female half to the salon for Liz’s help. Liz devises a plan to bring them to a house party for their first swinger encounter. She convinces Eric to let her go to the party alone and promises to send a video of her naughtiness. Eric is excited by this suggestion but has no idea what Liz is really up to. While Michelle’s husband is already going to town on the other women, Michelle starts getting cold feet and then vomits all over the male half of the couple. Liz gets her out of the party.
Episode 3
Even though Michelle was embarrassed by what happened at the house party, her relationship and sex life have since improved dramatically and Liz is proud of herself for helping seemingly fix Michelle’s marriage. But, then Liz finds out that Michelle’s husband is cheating on her with the couple she hooked them up with. When a new couple enters the picture, Liz steers them away from Michelle and toward her and Eric to protect all parties from any drama. Michelle gets jealous and asks why Liz “cock blocked” her putting Liz in a dilemma as to whether or not she should tell her the truth about her husband’s extracurricular activities.
Episode 4
Liz decides to tell Michelle about her husband, but Michelle doesn’t believe her. So, Liz launches a plan to catch him red-handed. When Liz gives Michelle the evidence, she confronts her husband but eventually buys his excuses and it’s back to their fairy tale land marriage. When Eric accidentally stumbles upon Liz’s secret plan to catch Michelle’s husband, he thinks Liz is cheating on him.
Episode 5
When Eric confronts Liz about cheating, Liz finally comes clean about her hidden agenda to help Michelle and that she knows they are swingers. Liz feels relieved that he knows, but she conveniently leaves out the part about helping others using the hair salon as a front and how he’s even benefited from the situation. Eric freaks out at first about their lifestyle being out there, but he understands why Liz had to do it. Michelle tries to force a foursome between Liz and Eric at the club which causes a super awkward moment. Liz has to get real with Michelle and tells her that they are too close of friends to be involved sexually and she needs to stop swinging because her marriage is irreparable. Liz’s real talk crushes Michelle.
Episode 6
Michelle, still reeling from Liz’s scathing truth bombs, attempts to seduce Eric. He refuses and immediately tells Liz. Liz and Eric have a great heart-to-heart as she has mixed emotions. She is grateful for the trust and connection she and Eric have but feels betrayed by her best friend. Liz confronts Michelle and ends up firing her from the hair salon.
Episode 7
Liz and Eric have a huge fight after Michelle tells him that Liz has been helping other swingers this entire time. Eric is pissed about the deception but also that Liz is putting them in danger of being exposed more. Liz feels she finally has a purpose and can help people.Episode 8
Someone comes into the salon for Liz’s advice and she can’t refuse to help them. Liz sees social media posts from Michelle making it look like her marriage is rock solid. Eric leaves Liz.
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What we learned from this assignment is that we got stuck trying to perfect the story and making sure everything made sense instead of just brainstorming and getting the first draft out. It was more challenging than expected.
EP1: Liz tells Michelle she’s been a swinger for 14 years
-Michelle tells Liz she’s considering swinging to help her marriage
-Liz goes incognito to figure out if Michelle is going to the club they frequent
-Liz hides her and Eric when Michelle does show up
-Liz confronts Michelle in the bathroom and the secret is out (but Eric doesn’t know)
EP2: Liz agrees to help Michelle
-Liz agrees to show Michelle the ropes of swinging if she doesn’t tell Eric
-Michelle brings someone she’s met to the salon for Liz’s advice
-Liz sets them up for an encounter but Michelle chickens out
-Liz feels alive helping people with her advice
EP3: Liz finds out Michelle’s husband is cheating on her
-Michelle goes to Liz after she suspects her husband is cheating
-Liz investigates Michelle’s husband
-Liz finds out he’s cheating with the couple she tried to set them up with and tells Michelle
EP4: Liz tries to get Michelle to see the truth about her marriage
-Liz gives Michelle the evidence of her husband’s affair
-Michelle confronts her husband
-Michelle buys her husband’s excuses and it’s back to fairy tale land
-Liz doesn’t get how clueless Michelle is
EP5: Liz tells Eric that Michelle knows they are swingers
-Liz tells Eric she outed them to Michelle
-Eric freaks out but then understands why Liz did it
-Michelle suggests a foursome with Liz and Eric
-Liz refuses and tells Michelle her marriage is unfixable which crushes Michelle
EP6: Michelle tries to seduce Eric
-Michelle reveals that she ultimately wants what Liz has and tries to seduce Eric but he refuses
-Eric tells Liz and they have a great heart-to-heart.
-Michelle and Liz have a big fight
-Liz fires Michelle from the salon
EP7: Michelle tells Eric about Liz’s hidden agenda
-Michelle tells Eric that Liz is helping other people with swinging
-Liz and Eric have a huge fight and she tells him this is her purpose
EP8: Eric leaves Liz
-Someone comes into the salon for Liz’s advice and she can’t refuse
-Michelle posts on social media making it look like her marriage is rock solid
-Eric leaves Liz
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by Dave Arena.
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by
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Season 1: Can’t Put the Genie Back in the Bottle
An in-the-closet swinger for over 14 years, Liz is forced to out herself in order to save her best friend Michelle’s marriage. With this secret finally off her chest, Liz, with help from Michelle, use their hair salon as a front for sex and relationship advice. Through this, Liz guides people into the swinger world and shows them what works and what blows up in people’s faces. Liz hides this from her husband Eric who has no idea they’ve been exposed let alone that she is teaching the community about the lifestyle. He eventually finds out and is not happy as he wants no part of their sex life public, but Liz feels like for the first time in her life she is living authentically and has found her purpose.
Season 2: Family Matters
Liz attempts to reconcile with Eric but it’s proving more difficult than she thought since this is the only time she’s ever deceived him, which is a trigger that brings him back to trust issues from middle school. When someone who Liz was helping inadvertently tells Liz’s sister Teresa about her being a swinger, she’s delighted to tell her parents so once again she looks like the golden child, which spirals everything out of control. Now, Liz has to deal with all the emotions and wounds that she suppressed from childhood not to mention the catholic guilt from her mother, while Eric is incensed at the family finding out. She finds solace in the relationship with her father, who understands what Liz is going through since he has also struggled with living his truth as a still married and closeted trans, but when he suddenly dies, Liz refuses to live her life as he did.
Season 3: Fuck It!
Liz is still reeling from her father’s death and refuses to live as he did. Eric understands where she is coming from, and although he is still not comfortable with the entire situation, he supports her and they are stronger than ever. Now, that her biggest ally in the family is gone, the rift between Liz, her mother, and her sister is wider than ever. Teresa, doing anything she can to help her husband win the mayoral election, uses her position as a local news anchor to organize and then report on a protest in front of the club Liz and Eric frequent so her husband can make the cleanup of the seedy swinger underworld part of his platform. When Liz gets triggered by someone Teresa is interviewing, she exposes her and Eric as swingers on the local news to the entire community. Now, Liz and Eric have to deal with this really being out there and all the opposing religious and moral BS from the vanilla world, which eventually causes Eric to lose his job and people from the community to stop visiting Liz’s hair salon because there is too much heat on them.
Season 4: The Sexperts
Now that they are fully exposed and in financial trouble, Liz and Eric go all-in on making this a full-time business for both of them. Even though Eric’s worst fear was having his sexual lifestyle public, he has always wanted to start his own business and get out of the corporate rat race so this is oddly a blessing in disguise. Now that they’ve formed a power couple, Liz and Eric navigate the ups and downs of starting a business from scratch. Using social media, they explode in popularity, and just when they’ve built it up to a point where they can embark on a national speaking tour, Liz’s mother gets sick, she moves in with them, and they have to cancel the tour. In her final days, Liz and her mother try to reconcile and find common ground. The season ends with the death of Liz’s mother.
Season 5: The Celebrity Sexperts
After finding peace with her mother’s death, Liz is no longer going to let anyone or anything stop her on the way to the top. Liz and Eric get back into the swing of things and go on the national tour that was postponed. They have now reached celebrity status and are reaping the benefits of that, but, it also comes with a lot more responsibility and also bullshit from opposers now that they are in the national spotlight. Liz’s sister Teresa is infuriated at the picture-perfect life Liz has built and tries to sabotage her at any chance as her own life and marriage come crumbling down. With Teresa at rock bottom and facing her biggest fear of being exposed as a less than perfect fraud, Liz helps her to let all of that go, live authentically, and realize she’s good enough as is.
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What we learned from this process is to really cut a lot of the fat and get to the most interesting aspects of the characters especially when it comes to the dynamics between characters where the conflict jumps off the page.
Liz Kane
Liz has no filter and masks her insecurities by being fiery and short-tempered. She has to butt in when she thinks people are wrong or need help. Raised on catholic guilt from her mother and by a dad who is trans but still married to her mom, this formed Liz’s belief that monogamy wasn’t natural.
Most consider Liz’s marriage “couple goals”, but nobody knows they’ve been swingers for 14 years. She wants to live authentically and be out about her lifestyle (unlike her dad), but her husband Eric is perfectly cozy in the swinger’s closet. She also doesn’t know if she’s ready for the vanilla world’s bullshit.
When she’s forced out to help save her best friend Michelle’s marriage, Liz feels alive with this finally off her chest. With Michelle’s help, she gives sex and relationship advice using their hair salon as a front, but Eric has no idea. You can’t put the genie back in the bottle, so what will life be like once more and more people know about their once closely held secret?
Eric Kane
Eric grew up the fat kid and never had a girlfriend until Liz. In middle school, his cousin slipped notes into his textbook making him think it was from a secret admirer, which caused trust and confidence issues (Liz is the only one he fully trusts).
While Liz runs toward confrontation and attention, Eric avoids it at all costs and is often embarrassed by her behavior. He tries to be Liz’s voice of reason. He’s triggered by being lied to which causes him to give the silent treatment (that drives Liz nuts).
He’s content with their lifestyle because he feels they have a much deeper level of trust and communication compared to most couples. He also gets off on other men being into his wife cause it validates that he has a hot chick which he could never get growing up.
He’s unhappy in the corporate rat race and wants to start his own business but he knows he needs to provide for his family and fears uncertainty.
As the series unfolds, how does Eric handle being outed? What issues will he and Liz have in their marriage because of this? Or will it be the opportunity he is looking for?
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What we learned from this exercise is that we really need to focus on what makes this intriguing and unique. Also, the direction we went in wasn’t what we originally had in mind.
1. Present your Concept.
A. An in-the-closet swinger outs herself and her husband
B. …to help save her best friend’s marriage…
C. …and finds her purpose…
D. …using her hair salon as a front for sex and relationship advice to prove monogamy isn’t natural.
2. Tell us the World of this show.
Unique Sub-World: The swinger lifestyle…
Previously unexplored: through a happily married couple who have been swingers for over 14 years
The unknown: as they go public
The unseen: what really goes on in the swinger lifestyle and all of its sub-worlds (i.e. BDSM, poly, etc.)
Unheard of Dangers: judgment, regrets of not living authentically, staying in a miserable relationship, getting into a non-monogamous relationship for the wrong reasons
Reason to explore it: to question and shake up societal norms. In our experience, a committed, non-monogamous relationship if done right is the most natural and fulfilling for humans.
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Victoria & Dave have finished the BW framework and are ready for feedback!
What we learned is that all of the work from the entire module wrapped up nicely by putting all of our answers into the framework. We are very glad that we trusted the process and did the work!
Please DM us for feedback exchange.
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Binge-Worthy TV – Lesson 11
What we learned during this assignment was that it’s a challenge to come up with 20 ideas of irony. We think the first several came easy, bit it was harder to dig deeper. We believe that more of these ideas will come with time.
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show
Tell us the irony you have already discovered in the Example Show.
Judy doesn’t get any significant work, but she helps them out of major jams
Eli is a celebrity Christian minister but doesn’t act very Christian outside of the church
Jesse is ready to take over the church but is immature and parties
<hr>ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show
Look back through your previous assignments and find at least 20 different situations or character components that you could go opposite to create irony.
With each, brainstorm ideas for ways it could go opposite.
Select the ones that work well for the show and share the character and situational irony ideas with us.
Liz is completely secure in the swinger world but afraid to come out for fear of judgment
Michelle thinks swinging will save her marriage
Michelle knows everything about Liz except that she’s a swinger
Liz is completely open and honest with Eric about everything yet covers up that she outed herself to Michelle and is giving people in the community sex advice
Liz’s Mom is a strict Catholic and won’t divorce her husband but lives with him being a secret cross-dresser
Mary tries to be zen, but freaks out when anything doesn’t go as planned
Liz is insecure but acts tough to hide it
Michelle wants a fairy tale relationship but her marriage is falling apart
Teresa wants to appear as a perfect couple, but she’s not in a happy marriage
Liz says “to each their own” about different lifestyle situations and kinks but then judges them as being wrong
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Binge-Worthy TV – Lesson 10
What we learned during this assignment was that it’s a bit surprising how many of these are used during a season/series. For The Righteous Gemstones, we could have easily kept going and filled in more examples and that show has only been on air for 2 seasons.
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show
Watch the next episode of your Example Show and notice how layers show up in this show — both in this episode and throughout the episodes you’ve already seen.
Tell us the layers you have discovered in the Example Show.
PLOT LAYERS – Story beneath the story.
Major scheme revealed
Jesse being blackmailed
The party tape
The Lissons attempting to kill EliMystery revealed
Who is behind the blackmail
What happened the night of the party and how Gideon filmed them
What happened to Thaniel BlockThought the story was one thing, but it is another
Major shift in Meaning
Hidden history
Eli and Aimee Leigh’s building their congregation
Aimee-Leigh being a tyrant to her workers
Aimee-Leigh and Baby Billy being childhood country stars
Jesse ruining Judy’s birthday partyHidden plan
Eli taking over Locust Grove
Baby Billy leaving his family
Gideon and Scotty’s plan to rob the church
Tiffany and Baby Billy kill Scotty and cover it up, steal moneyMajor betrayal
Gideon betraying his Father Jesse
Judy deciding to perform with Baby Billy
Judy refusing to perform on Easter at Eli’s church
Gideon backs out of the plan with Scotty
Baby Billy stealing the money2. Brainstorm a list of possible CHARACTER layers.
CHARACTER LAYERS – identity beneath the identity.
Secret identity
Amber is a bad ass with a full arsenal of weapons in her closet
Jesse’s eldest son Gideon was kept secret for the first several episodes
Keefe’s pastCharacter intrigue
Baby Billy is bitter that Eli has success with his sister and cut him out
Kelvin’s sexuality
Chad and his wife
Judy and BJ
The Gemstone kids being so immatureHidden relationships and conspiracies
Baby Billy has a son from a previous relationship who he also abandoned.
Kelvin and Keefe’s relationshipHidden Character history
Kelvin and Keefe’s past
Judy’s sexual past
Eli as a former pro wrestlerOur Show: Couple Goals
ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show
Discover the layers that could exist for your show.
1. Brainstorm a list of possible PLOT layers.
PLOT LAYERS – Story beneath the story.
Major scheme revealed
Michelle’s husband cheated on her and she’s considering swinging to save her marriage
Mystery revealed
Thought the story was one thing, but it is another
Major shift in Meaning
Hidden history
Michelle and Eric dated in high school??? OR Michelle and Liz fooled around once????
Hidden plan
Liz gives sex advice out of her hair salon
Major betrayal
Liz doesn’t tell Eric that she’s giving sex advice from her hair salon and outing them little by little
Liz is forced to out herself to Michelle without Eric knowing
Liz never told Michelle about her being a swinger even though she knows everything about her.
2. Brainstorm a list of possible CHARACTER layers.
CHARACTER LAYERS – identity beneath the identity.
Secret identity
Liz and Eric have been swingers for 14 years
Liz’s dad is a cross-dresser and bi-sexualCharacter intrigue
Michelle and Liz – what happens after Michelle knows about Liz being a swinger
Liz and Eric – she wants to be out and live authentically, he does not.Hidden relationships and conspiracies
Liz and her Mom are the only ones who know about her Dad being a cross-dresser and Liz helps with hair and makeup.
Liz’s Mom and Dad are still together to keep up appearances and because of her Mom’s religious beliefs.
Hidden Character history
Liz’s emotional abuse from her Mother as a child
Eric being punked which made him lost trust in girls3. Organize them each into a possible sequence of reveals.
Plot Surface:
Layer 1: Liz’s best friend Michelle considers swinging to save her marriage
Layer 2: By warning Michelle that that’s not a good idea, she outs herself and husband Eric as swingers
Layer 3: Liz feels alive now that her secret is off her chest
Layer 4: Liz starts using her hair salon as a front to give sex & relationship advice
Layer 5: Liz’s husband Eric doesn’t know she outed them and is giving advice to people in their community
Layer 6: When Liz’s Father, who lived secretly as a cross-dresser dies, Liz wants to be all the way out and aspires to be a sexpert
Layer 7: The show is about swinging, but really is about living authentically.
Character Surface:
Layer 1: Liz and Eric have secretly been swingers for 14 years
Layer 2: Liz wants to be out and live authentically, Eric wants to stay in the swinger closet. They both have issues from childhood that cause what they want
Layer 3: Liz was emotionally abused and sex shamed by her Mother growing up and her Father is secretly a cross-dresser but stays married to her Mom because of her religious beliefs and to keep up appearances
Layer 4: Liz is the only one who knows about her Father (other than her Mother) and helps him with hair and makeup
Layer 5: Liz’s Mother is principal at a Catholic school and very religious. She will not accept Liz’s lifestyle
Layer 6: Liz’s sister, Teresa, also keeps up appearances like her Mother and wants everything to be perfect. When her husband Roger announces his candidacy for Mayor, Liz’s lifestyle is going to cause an issue
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Binge-Worthy TV – Lesson 9
What we learned during this assignment is asking questions that can be open loops seemed much easier for us than coming up with mysteries and figuring out which parts not to reveal.
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show
1. Think about your Example Show. Make a list of the Big Picture open loops that were established early in the season.
-Jesse’s blackmail and party video
-Baby Billy Freeman coming back
-Aimee-Leigh’s death
-What happened to Gideon?
2. Watch the next episode and see how those open loops are being used to create the need to see future episodes.
I’ve noticed that in this show at least, they give you the more back story and/or perspectives from other characters to keep the loops open. For example, with Baby Billy, you get into more of his back story and then get Aimee-Leigh’s perspective. With the blackmail, you get Chad and his wife’s story/perspective.
ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show
Our Show: Couple Goals
1. Use this list to brainstorm big picture open loops for your first season that you will use to keep the audience captivated.
GOALS:
New goals?
-Liz wants to be out about her swinging lifestyle
Goals related to the big picture?
-Liz wants to be the “go-to expert” on sex, swinging, and relationships
Competition / conflict around goals?
-Society doesn’t have the same beliefs as Liz. Even other people in the lifestyle don’t have the same beliefs as Liz.
CONSEQUENCES:
Good plans gone wrong?
-Liz wants to tell her best friend Michelle that swinging is not going to save her marriage but can’t without outing herself and her husband.
-Liz being judged and shamed by others.
-Liz losing her husband.
-Liz damaging her relationships with her daughter, friends and family.
-Being out about their lifestyle can affect her business and Eric’s career.
SOLVING PROBLEMS:
What is the major problem for this character?
-Liz is a badass in the swinger lifestyle and wants to live authentically and be out about it, but isn’t sure if she can handle the judgment from society and the stress it may put on her and her family’s lives.
What are they trying to solve?
-She’s trying to help others in their relationships (swinger and vanilla) and also to validate her own choices and lifestyle.
Major change imposed on character?
-She’s secretly been a swinger for over 14 years and now she’s out.
-Her actions also out her husband Eric who doesn’t want to be public about their lifestyle.
RELATIONSHIPS:
Relationships in peril?
-Liz’s strict Catholic Mother will not accept their swinging lifestyle
-Liz’s sister Teresa and her husband Roger who is running for Mayor want to keep up their perfect appearances, so Liz and Eric being out will reflect bad on them.
New relationships forming?
-As people want/need Liz’s help, new relationships will be formed.
Conflict inside relationships?
-Liz runs toward confrontation and her husband Eric avoids it at all costs.
-Liz wants to be out about their swinging lifestyle and Eric is cozy in the swinger closet.
-How will Liz and Eric’s lifestyle affect their daughter Mary who is just starting high school?Relationships changing?
-Her swinging lifestyle is the only thing Liz has ever kept secret from her best friend Michelle and now she knows.
-Liz’s Dad, who is secretly a cross-dresser becomes even closer to Liz as she’s doing what he never could, be authentic.
DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
Can they survive X?
-Will Liz and Eric’s marriage survive being out about their swinging lifestyle?
Putting themselves in danger / making dangerous decisions?
-External situations fueled by sex can cause various dangerous situations.
Internal dangers (drug addiction, need for medicine, inner demons)?
-This is Liz’s dilemma/central conflict. She is proud of her swinging lifestyle and has strong convictions about it being the most natural way for humans to have a relationship, but she’s also worried her insecurities around being judged and shamed will be too much to bear.
2. Tell us your top 5-8 Big Picture Open Loops that could be in your pilot.
1. Will Liz out herself and Eric publicly?
2. Will Liz and Eric’s marriage survive?
3. Will Liz make a career out of this?
4. Will Eric’s career suffer?
5. How will Liz and Michelle’s relationship evolve?
6. How will family life be now with their daughter Mary?
7. What will happen with Liz’s parents?
8. Will Roger win the Mayoral election?
9. Will Liz get validation and heal her childhood wounds?
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Binge-Worthy TV – Lesson 8
What we learned during this assignment is that this was the toughest lesson for us so far. I know it shouldn’t matter if it’s a comedy or not, but it just seemed more difficult. We still aren’t sure if we really have this down, but for the sake of not getting stuck, we filled in the blanks and moved on.
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show
Watch the next episode of your Example Show and focus on the mysteries that have been created in that show. Also, notice the difference between the big picture mysteries that are a big part of the plot across the entire season versus the smaller mysteries.
Tell us about the mysteries from this show.
Shocking Event Mystery
A. Shocking Event: Jesse blackmailed about the party video
B. Secret: Who is blackmailing him?
C. Investigation: Jesse, Judy and Kelvin investigate it
WHAT: Blackmailers ask for 1 million in cash
WHEN: Blackmail is current, the video is from several months ago
WHERE: a church conference in Atlanta
Missing before final episodes:
WHY: Jesse didn’t support Gideon’s dream of being a stunt man in Hollywood
WHO: Jesse’s oldest son Gideon
HOW: Gideon devised a plan with his stunt mentor Scotty
Ultimate Reveal: The audience sees what went down that night at the conference with Gideon and Jesse that forced Gideon to leave and also how he filmed them.
Over Time Mystery
How did the Gemstones build their empire?
A. Cover up: The series starts current day with the Gemstones being at the top of the evangelist/mega-church food chain, but we don’t know how they got this status.
B. Secret: How did the Gemstones build their empire and what happened to Aimee-Leigh?
C. Reveals: Through a series of flashbacks, back story on each character and how they got to the current day is revealed.
WHO: The matriarch of the family, Aimee-Leigh was the real magic behind the church and family
WHAT: Aimee-Leigh was a childhood country music star along with her brother Baby Billy Freeman
WHEN: From childhood but more so, once Aimee-Leigh married Eli
WHY: She put her career on hiatus to raise the family and help Eli with his evangelical endeavors.
WHERE: South Carolina
Missing:
HOW: How the Gemstones built their empire.
ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show<div>
Our Show: Couple Goals
Create two mysteries for your show — one that shows up strong in the Pilot and the other that is revealed over time.
1. Create your Shocking Event Mystery and tell us the WWWWW and H, along with the part withheld.
A. Shocking Event: Liz outs herself as a swinger to her best friend Michelle.
B. Secret: Liz and Eric have secretly been swingers for 14 years and Michelle doesn’t know.
C. Investigation: Liz tries to keep it secret by investigating if Michelle is going to frequent the local swinger club they go to.
WHO: Liz, Eric, and Michelle
WHAT: Michelle is considering swinging
WHEN: Over a few days
WHERE: Small town Ohio
HOW: Liz outs herself to Michelle after warning her through a TikTok post that swinging won’t save her marriage
Part Withheld:
WHY: Liz knows from experience that this won’t help Michelle’s marriage and also based on a secret her parents have in their marriage.
2. Create the Over Time Mystery and tell us the WWWWW and H, along with the part withheld.
A. Cover up: Liz’s parents stay together in a miserable and sexless marriage because of her Mother’s religious beliefs and to keep up appearances in the community.
B. Secret: Liz’s Dad is secretly a cross-dresser and bi-sexual.
C. Reveals: Flashbacks to how Liz was shamed and abused by her Mother and how she found out about her Dad, and supports him. Also, current day dynamics of the relationship she has with both her parents.
WHO: Liz and her parents
WHAT: it’s the reason she’s non-monogamous
WHEN: flashbacks of when Liz was a child on through current day
WHERE: Small town Ohio
Part Withheld:
HOW: how did Liz find out about her Dad.
WHY: Liz’s belief systems around sex and relationships were formed from her parent’s marriage, strict religious dogma, and shaming/abuse from her Mother growing up and it’s why she feels swinging is the most natural way for humans to have a relationship.
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Binge-Worthy TV – Lesson 7
What we learned during this assignment is the big picture empathy and distress for each character keep showing up in all sorts of situations during each episode.
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show
1. Watch the next episode of your Example Show and focus on the Empathy/Distress that shows up in this episode and throughout the season so far.
2. Notice the difference between Big Picture Empathy/Distress and detail-oriented Empathy/Distress. Big Picture will have an impact across multiple episodes.
Eli’s wife dying
Judy being overlooked/overshadowed
Jesse not being good enough to take over from Eli
Jesse being blackmailed
Jesse has to admit to his wife about the video
Gideon not having his parent’s support for this dream
Baby Billy is lost without his sister
Kelvin trying to be more than a youth minister
Keefe dealing with his demonsASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show
Our Show: Couple Goals
1. Make a list of BIG PICTURE difficult situations and decisions your characters could make because of the main conflict of this series.
Just ask: “Knowing the concept, what are the big picture Empathy/Distress situations that could occur?”
A. Undeserved misfortune
Liz’s Father dies
Liz is emotionally abused by her MotherB. External Character conflicts
Liz and Teresa in competition (perfect sister vs black sheep sister)
Liz and her Mother hate each other
Liz confronts and Eric avoids it
Liz wants to be out about their swinging, but Eric doesn’t
Michelle getting divorcedC. Plot intruding on life
As more people find out about Liz and Eric being swingers, it intrudes on their vanilla life.
D. Moral dilemmas
Liz’s Mother stays married because of her religious beliefs, but her husband is secretly a cross-dresser
E. Forced decisions they’d never make
Liz tells Michelle that she’s a swinger without Eric knowing
Liz giving swinger, sex, and relationship advice without Eric knowing -
Binge-Worthy TV – Lesson 6
What we learned during this assignment is there are always deeper levels in the characters on these shows and they are sometimes revealed slowly. We also were surprised how deep you can go when you start thinking about it and how we are already starting to get show and arc ideas just from doing an exercise like this.
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
<div>
</div>ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show
Judy & Eli
Surface: Father/daughter
Common Ground: The family business/church
Conflict: she wants meaningful work with the church & Eli doesn’t think she’s worthy.
History: Daddy’s little girl
Subtext: Resents Eli for overlooking her
Relationship Arc: didn’t see her talent to seeing her Mother’s talent in her
Judy & Jesse
Surface: brother/sister
Common Ground: family business/church
Conflict: sibling rivalry
History: Jesse ruined her birthday
Subtext: Competition, Jesse thinks the meaningful roles in the church are “man’s work”
Relationship Arc: worthless to valued ally
Judy & BJ
Surface: engaged couple
Common Ground: undervalued / both want more attention from Eli
Conflict: control
History: Judy controls BJ, she also lies to the family about him spending the night with her out of wedlock
Subtext: she lied to him about being over experienced with sex
Relationship Arc: together to break up to reconcile
ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show
Our Show: Couple Goals
Liz & Eric
Surface: marriage
Common Ground: marriage/swinging
Conflict: she is confrontational, he avoids conflict. She wants to be out about their lifestyle, he wants to keep it private
History: they are ride or die, they protect each other
Subtext: she has a need to be authentic and out about their lifestyle
Relationship Arc: in the closet swingers to totally out
Liz & Michelle
Surface: best friends
Common Ground: own the hair salon together
Conflict: love & relationships
History: they’ve been friends since kindergarten and tell each other everything
Subtext: Being a swinger is the only thing Liz has hidden from her. Michelle is has some secret jealousy of Liz and Eric’s relationship
Relationship Arc: best friends to estranged due to Liz rejecting Michelle’s want of having a threesome with her and Eric.
Liz & Teresa
Surface: sisters
Common Ground: grew up with the same abusive Mother
Conflict: jealousy & competition
History: Teresa is the perfect sister, Liz is the black sheep
Subtext: they are the only ones other than their Mother who know their Dad is a cross-dresser
Relationship Arc: combative/competitive to some cooperation
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This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by Dave Arena.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by
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Binge-Worthy TV – Lesson 5
What we learned during this assignment is you really need to know these characters on a deep emotional level so that profile can inform how to write their action and dialogue. Because, two characters could have the same wants but for different needs and/or they have different triggers, wounds/weaknesses, and coping mechanisms, which would cause them to do things, say things, and react completely differently given the same set of circumstances. We think this is how you really create characters that have a unique voice and personality from each other.
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show
Watch the next episode of your Example Show and create an Emotional Profile for two or three main characters in this show.
Jesse
A. Situational: Hope – take over the church from Eli / Fear – not being good enough
B. Motivation: Want – Power / Need – Respect
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – Insecure / Public Mask – Arrogant
D. Weaknesses – bad judgment
E. Triggers – getting called out / caught
F. Coping Mechanism – Attack (usually with a boneheaded plan)
Judy
A. Situational: Hope – to be considered an equal Gemstone / Fear – She’ll never get it
B. Motivation: Want – she wants a more significant role in the family business / Need – Approval / Significance
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – Hurt / Public Mask – Tough
D. Weaknesses – Immature
E. Triggers – Rejection
F. Coping Mechanism – angry outbursts
ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show<div>
Our show: Couple Goals
1. For each of your main characters, brainstorm an Emotional Profile, filling in the following:
Liz
A. Situational: Hope – to be the go-to expert on swinging and relationships / Fear – judgment
B. Motivation: Want – to be authentic / Need – validation
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – insecure / Public Mask – tough
D. Weaknesses – short-tempered
E. Triggers – being disrespected
F. Coping Mechanism – confrontation
Eric
A. Situational: Hope – Start his own business / get out of the rat race / Fear – uncertainty
B. Motivation: Want – freedom / Need – provide for his family
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – insecure / Public Mask – sense of humor
D. Weaknesses – self-deprecating / lacking confidence
E. Triggers – being lied to
F. Coping Mechanism – shuts down / gets quite
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Binge-Worthy TV – Lesson 4
What we learned during this assignment is that we were surprised how many of these layers were there even in a comedy.
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
ASSIGNMENT 1:
1. Think about your Example Show. Make a list of the places you’ve already seen Character Intrigue in the previous episodes.
Hidden agendas:
Gideon plotting against his parents
Jesse trying to get money from Martin for the ransom
Judy stealing money from the churchCompetition:
You can see competition in the constant sibling rivalries between Jesse, Judy and Kelvin.
Eli vs Johnny Seasons
Eli vs Baby BillyConspiracies:
Scotty, Gideon, and Lucy ransom plot against Jesse
Eli plotting to take over Johnny Season’s town with his own church
Jesse’s plan to attack Johnny Seasons
Jesse’s plan to get the surveillance video from the store
Scotty and Gideon’s plan to get money from the church
Johnny Seasons leaves pamphlets outside of Eli’s new church telling people not to attend and then sends a gang to vandalize the churchSecrets:
Jesse keeps the secret of his partying in Atlanta from his wife
Jesse keeping the ransom from Eli
Baby Billy actually sold some of the family property
Gideon is the person responsible for the ransom on Jesse
Judy has her boyfriend stay overnight
Judy secretly stole and hid money from the churchDeception:
Jesse lying to his wife about the text messages and the partying
Baby Billy lied about not selling the family property
Judy lies about her boyfriend spending the night
Gideon coming home but it’s really to scope out valuables to stealWound:
Eli’s pain over his wife’s death
Judy being the middle child and looked over
Kelvin is in the shadow of Jesse
Gideon is not being supported in his dream of being a stunt man in HollywoodSecret Identity:
Gideon, Scotty, and Lucy wearing masks and asking for a ransom from Jesse
Kelvin’s sexuality
Gideon wasn’t revealed until later2. Watch the next episode and see how Character Intrigue is being used to create the need to see more episodes.
It seems to us that the writers continue opening and closing loops to keep us intrigued. For example, in this episode, Jesse deduces the blackmailers have no power and that their problem is over (close loop), but then Scotty comes to Jesse’s house posing as an old friend of Gideon’s (conspiracy/secret identity), and the loop opens back up. In addition, we’ve noticed that several of these layers of intrigue are combined. For example, when Judy is asked to perform at Baby Billy’s church (tied into Judy’s wound of being overlooked/never allowed to do anything meaningful), Eli warns her that he’s using her to get back at him (conspiracy/deception).
ASSIGNMENT 2
1. For your Inner Circle characters, fill in any of the Intrigue items that apply.
Character Name: Liz
Role: Wants to be the go-to expert in the swinger lifestyle and the audience’s guide into that world
Hidden agendas:
She wants to be out about her lifestyle and eventually a relationship expert
She often has a hidden agenda when it comes to getting her husband Eric involved with a couple or single female because he’s clueless and doesn’t pick up on flirting, etc.Competition:
Liz vs her perfect sister Teresa
Liz vs other swingers
Liz vs people in the community that oppose her lifestyle
Liz vs other relationship experts/influencers (vanilla and swinger)Conspiracies:
In each episode, Liz will conspire to help other swingers or even people in vanilla relationships whether they want her help or not.
Secrets:
She’s a swinger
She’s the only one other than her Mother that knows her Dad is a cross-dresserDeception:
She deceives her daughter when she questions “where are you going dressed like that?”
She deceives others by lying about where she’s going, why she has to leave family events early, etc.
She deceives her husband Eric by not always being forthcoming about her intentions of helping other swingersWound:
She was sex shamed by her strict Catholic Mother
She was never good enough compared to her perfect sister
She was always the fat girlfriend of the hot chicks growing up, which has caused her to have negative body image issuesSecret Identity:
She is secretly a relationship expert using her hair salon as a front
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What we learned doing this assignment is that this is a really good model to focus the characters and to make sure they have deeper levels to them. We also found it easy to come up with the answers for our lead character (Liz), but a little harder for the husband (Eric). We also think the role and unique purpose/expertise are important to make sure the character is in the script for a specific reason and to show how they will support the journey of the lead character (s).
ASSIGNMENT 1:
Example Show: The Righteous Gemstones
Journey of the show: The Gemstone family tries to keep their mega-church thriving after the matriarch dies.
Character: Judy Gemstone
A. Role in the show: She is the daughter and middle child in the Gemstone clan.
B. Unique Purpose / Expertise: She is street smart and a fixer.
C. Intrigue: What is the secret beneath the surface? She was supposed to be the youngest child, but after a surprise pregnancy and the birth of Kelvin, she resented her parents for making her the middle child.
D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? She will do whatever it takes to prove she’s good enough, i.e. she bails Jesse out of the ransom situation by giving him the money she’s been stealing from the family church and hiding for herself.
E. Unpredictable: What will they do next? She has constant emotional outbursts.
F. Empathetic: Why do we care? She feels that her family doesn’t let her shine the way she’s meant to and that she’s in the shadows.
ASSIGNMENT 2:Our Show: Couple Goals
1. Tell us the journey of your show.
Liz wants to be out about her swinging lifestyle.
2. Who are the main characters that will sell your show?
Liz
Eric3. Answer these questions for each of those characters.
Liz
A. Role in the show: The expert and guide into the swinger lifestyle
B. Unique Purpose / Expertise: After 14 years, she’s a badass in the swinger lifestyle and knows what works and what will blow up a relationship. She wants to help others that consider Liz and Eric “couple goals” and want what they have.
C. Intrigue: What is the secret beneath the surface? Liz’s Mom, who is a principal of a Catholic school, is still married to her Dad despite the fact that he is a cross-dresser because divorce is against her religion (and also to keep up appearances).
D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? Liz believes that being non-monogamous is the most natural way for humans to behave and trying to hold other humans to being monogamous is what causes so many divorces and miserable relationships in modern society.
E. Unpredictable: What will they do next? When Liz sees a red flag in a relationship or swinger situation, she feels compelled to interject, come to the rescue, and/or give helpful advice even when it’s not wanted. She literally can’t help herself and I’m no psychologist, but it’s like some primal subconscious reptilian brain shit where it’s life or death to her if she doesn’t speak up. This can lead to angry outbursts as her “hood” comes out.
F. Empathetic: Why do we care? Even though Liz is confident in the swinger world, she can’t live with being inauthentic and hiding this part of her life outside of it. But, she also still fears being judged and the unknowns of coming out and how it will affect her reputation, her marriage, her relationships with her daughter, family and friends, her business, income, etc.
Eric
A. Role in the show: Liz’s husband
B. Unique Purpose / Expertise: He tries to be the voice of reason for Liz.
C. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface? When he was 14, a female cousin played a practical joke on him where she left a note from a “secret admirer” inside one of his textbooks. When he confided in her about it, she kept the gag going, making him try to guess who it was in his school. Eventually, she revealed it was a prank. That caused him to have trust and confidence issues especially when it comes to girls.
D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? His beliefs about monogamy are aligned with Liz, but he has the extra burden of dealing with society’s morals when it comes to women and sex, how can he let other men have sex with his wife, etc.
E. Unpredictable: What will they do next? He will do anything in his power to prevent attention from being drawn to him and will avoid confrontation at all costs. He will also try and intercede if he sees a situation that will cause Liz to go nuclear.
F. Empathetic: Why do we care? Eric is cozy in the swinger closet, but Liz keeps pushing the boundaries as she explores wanting to be out. The stakes for Eric are having to live with the attention and potential shame of being outed, while also fearing that he won’t be able to provide for his family if this comes to light.
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Victoria & Dave’s three circles of characters – Day 2
What we learned doing this assignment was this is a great way to really focus your characters. First, it gets you really clear on the main characters and their journey. Then, you can see who the connected characters are currently and who else could be added that impacts the main character’s journey in some meaningful way. In other words, there has to be a good reason for those connected characters to be there instead of just putting a bunch of meaningless people in your script.
OUR SHOW: Couple Goals
A. Main Characters Circle:
LIZ KANE, 40, a thicker, edgier Marilyn Monroe type, who can read people like it’s her job. She’s been a badass in the swinging lifestyle for over 12 years and wants to be the “go to expert for swingers,” debunking myths, misconceptions and helping others who are just starting out.
ERIC KANE, 42, Liz’s husband, avoids confrontation and attention at all costs, he wants nothing to do with Liz’s dream of being some swinger version of Love Line.
MARY KANE, 14, Liz and Eric’s only child, nerdy cute, never met a checklist she didn’t love, her goal is to win the Mack Gerd Memorial Award in high school just like her Aunt Teresa.
B. Connected Circle:
TERESA PALUTTO-SMYTH, 38, Liz’s perfect sister
MICHELLE, 40, Liz’s bestie since grade school and co-owner of the hair salon with her
MARIA, 62, Liz & Teresa’s strict Catholic Mother
ROGER SMYTH, 46, Teresa’s husband who is also running for Mayor
VARIOUS – specific swingers or neighbors that Liz has meaningful storylines with during the series.C. Environment Circle:
Other swingers/lifestyle members
Co-workers
Neighbors/Members of the community
Mary’s classmates -
Assignment 1
What I learned is the main characters are fairly easy to pick out. And, also most of the connected circle is easy too, but I start questioning whether some are connected or environment. There seem to be a lot of connected characters but even if they are brief, I put connected characters as anyone who actually has decent screen time, dialogue, etc. I’m hopefully thinking about environmental characters correctly as mostly “extras”. I also really started thinking about and observing how the connected characters are helping with the journey of the main characters.
A. Main Characters Circle:
Dr. Eli Gemstone
Jesse Gemstone
Kelvin Gemstone
Judy GemstoneB. Connected Circle:
Keefe
Martin
Johnny Seasons
Baby Billy Freeman
Amber Gemstone
Aimee-Leigh Gemstone
Gideon
BJ
Jesse’s “gang” members
Tiffany Freeman, Baby Billy’s much younger and childish wife
Pontius Gemstone, Jesse’s son
Abraham Gemstone, Jesse’s youngest son
Scotty (season 1), a stuntman and associate of Gideon’s from Los Angeles
Mandy, wife, and later, ex-wife of Chad
Brock, a security guard at the Gemstones’ family compound
Dot Nancy, Dale and Gay Nancy’s rebellious teenage daughterC. Environment Circle:
Other pastors
Congregation
Community Members -
The Righteous Gemstones
What I learned doing this assignment is…?Even in a comedy/dramedy such as The Righteous Gemstones, it seems like the 3 biggest drivers of being binge-worthy in the order of importance I’d put them in are
1. Having empathy for and caring about the characters enough to invest time into what happens to them next.
2. Creating several open loops/questions that you want to find out the answers to. (I don’t think we care about #2 if wasn’t for #1).
3. A unique world is something that keeps you coming back if for nothing else than to learn more about it. I think this is a good combo to have with the first two points but probably not enough on its own to make me want to binge-watch.
Also, I realized how the pilot has to resolve a goal, for example, in this pilot it was the ransom, but at the same time leave enough other loops open that make you want to keep watching. Sometimes, I try and resolve too many things or have too many completed storylines in my pilots.
And finally, the levels of depth needed for the character work and similar to the open loops, you give enough to know the character pretty quickly on the surface, but you have a lot of questions about how deep they go, what’s their backstory, etc.
5 Star Points
Big Picture Hooks
Ask this: What is the big hook of this show?Honestly, I’m not 100% sure about this. My mind keeps going to “the inside world of a family-run mega church,” but I’m not sure if the world itself is the hook or should be the hook. Maybe what happens to this family and their church now that the wife/mother is dead?
Amazing and Intriguing Character
Ask this: What makes these main characters intriguing and interesting?Eli – The power he has both as leader of his church and family. Also, in the pilot, he comes off as domineering both to the kids and the smaller pastors who are worried about his new church stealing their congregations. We see the money and influence, but we also see his caring and love for his deceased wife who he considered “the magic”. So, I’m curious to know if he’s all business and not spiritual/religious at all, or is there a balance there? If a lot of the church was his wife’s vision as he said in the pilot, does he care as much? What’s his vision and future running the church and even the family without her?
Jesse – Obviously, Jesse is immature and we know from the video he’s blackmailed with that he has issues with drugs/partying, infidelity, etc. But, we also see he is a caring Father. I also want to know what happened with his son Gideon who nobody is allowed to mention.
Kelvin – Does he get out of the shadow of his older brother Jesse? He seems the opposite of Jesse in that he is by the book and even mentioned that Jesse’s plan to assault the blackmailers was wrong and criminal. Also, I’m curious about his sexuality which was questioned multiple times, and his relationship with Keefer.
Judy – She is outspoken and vulgar. She wants to be more involved in the church/family business but was told that women should be behind the scenes and that it’s “man work.” But, we realize she’s smart and savvy when she comes up with the money (that she’s been hiding) for Jesse’s ransom and saves the day.
Empathy / Distress
Ask this: What situation causes us to feel both empathy and distress for this character?Eli – His wife recently died and he has to deal with his immature kids.
Jesse – He is being blackmailed. He’s having problems with his middle son Pontius.
Kelvin – He is the younger brother, not as respected as Jesse. It also seems he’s not comfortable with his sexuality.
Judy – She’s overlooked and can’t participate/help in the family business.
Layers / Open Loops
Ask this: What questions are created by this first episode that can only be answered by watching the entire season?What happened to Eli’s wife?
Who is blackmailing Jesse?
What will happen with Eli vs Johnny Seasons?
What will happen to their church now that the wife/mom (and magic) is gone?
What happened with Jesse’s son Gideon?
Is Kelvin gay and what’s going on with Keefe?
Inviting Obsession
Ask this: How does this pilot create the need to see every single episode?I think the world itself, the inside of a family-run mega church, is unique and I find myself wanting to know more about it.
The character work and empathy created for each make me care enough to see what happens to them.
The fact that there are so many open loops and questions created by the pilot, makes me want to keep watching.
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Victoria & Dave Arena
We agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
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Hey everyone! Our names are Victoria & Dave Arena. We are a husband and wife comedy writing team from NYC. We have written 4 original pilots so far. What we want out of the class is a good framework for coming up with binge-worthy series which is what attracted us to this. We waste a lot of time it seems by getting to the pages too quickly and we’d like a process where we feel like we have a solid, sellable idea first before we end up having to write 8 versions of the pilot lol. Something unique about us, hmmm, Dave is a stand-up comic and I was a makeup artist on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon for the first 5 years of it being back here in NYC. We are excited to start this journey!