[Evelyn Petros]

Checking over my work for Module 1, I realized I had not listened to Audio Tapes #2-6, so I’m going back to listen to them. Listening to Tape #2 and 3, has inspired me to make some changes in my BW Framework, so I’m doing that, and also made me realize how many negative messages I’ve been giving myself, so now I am committing to stoping that and pressing ahead. Thank you for your patience.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 6 months ago by  Evelyn Petros.

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn has completed the BW Framework. (Finally!)

What I learned from this lesson: It’s been a humbling experience to see how much analysis and work must go into structuring a BW TV series before it’s even written. The process is intriguing and requires more time and organization than I am capable of at the moment. These 12 Lessons of Module 1 have confirmed that I am rather a rather undisciplined and rank beginner, but I’m having fun, and I’m learning a lot that is already helping me to brainstorm and thus fill in some of the gaps in my unfinished novel, which I plan to complete in first draft by May 2023, and repurpose it into a BW TV series. I still don’t think I’m up to it, but I vow to keep going no matter how long it takes and hopefully surprise myself with the end result. Thank you for your infinite patience!

[Evelyn Petros]

What I learned doing this assignment: I have only just started filling in the blanks for my M1/L12 BWTV Framework assignment, which is very difficult for me given the scope of the unfinished novel “Opera Aloha” which I am continuing to try to finish and which I have chosen to use as the basis of my BWTV Series. I realize that it would have been wiser for me to start from scratch on a completely new story, as Hal advised. I realize that I have bitten off much more than I can chew in that I have 2 main stories going on at the same time–a love story and an opera story, with 6 main characters, and also many other characters in minor plots besides the two main ones. I seem to have tons of material that could translate into several years of series, IF I, a novice, can pull it off. It remains to be seen if I can, though I rather doubt it. Perhaps it would have been better to finish writing my novel first, and then to use the ScreenwritingU lessons to figure out how to turn the finished novel into a BWTV Series, and not try to kill two birds with one stone.

Anyhow, the course has inspired me to make changes to chapters of the novel which will elevate it. I am committed to finishing this assignment and will let you know when am ready to have Dimitri critique it. I am loving the analytical process Hal has devised, and am learning so much from the lessons I have completed so far in this first Module. I hope I will be permitted to go through Modules 2-5, even though it will most likely take me a whole year or more to finish what the other students have managed to accomplish in 6 months. As a result of this course, I have come to have the deepest respect for Hal’s teaching, and for the process screenwriters must go through to create BingeWorthy TV series. I thank you and the ScreenwritingU team for your patience.

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s BWTV/M1/L11/A1&2 – Creating Irony

What I learned from this Lesson: In this lesson, Hal highlighted two types of irony a writer could use to make their series bingeworthy—1) character irony, and 2) situational irony. I have found it especially difficult and challenging to identify and/or create 20 instances of these in my own show (“Opera Aloha”). However, since I want to reach my goals of finishing writing the first complete draft of my novel “Opera Aloha” and writing a TV series based on it, no matter how long it takes me (as my progress continues at a snail’s pace), I vow to keep going with this course, even though I am not satisfied with my work in this lesson.

Assignment #1 – Irony in “Big Little Lies”

Bonnie – the New Age, laid back, meditating, peaceful Yoga teacher is the last person one would suspect to be a “killer,” but she’s the one that pushes Perry to his death to protect her girlfriends from his violence.

Celeste’s & Perry’s marriage – looks great from the outside, but is tragic and brutal.

Renata – the envy of her friends and neighbors for her business success, is financially sabotaged by her seemingly “loving and supportive” husband, Gordon.

Amabella – the child victim of bullying and physical injury is paralyzed by fear of what her tormentor will do if she divulges his identity, and so protects him and herself by staying silent.

There’s a lot more irony in this series than just the few examples above.

Assignment #2 – Irony in Evelyn’s show “Opera Aloha”

1) Stanley Farber, Mira Santiago’s “boyfriend” and “soul mate” of three months, shocks Mira by confessing his intention to transform, and uses it as an excuse to dump her.

2) Mira desperately wants the whole enchilada–love, marriage, and children—but after her “unforgettable dinner date” with Stan, she swears off men forever, blaming herself and her dysfunctional romance radar for her latest romantic fiasco.

3) Mira falls for Wynston Irving Trapnell, “Wyn,” the charismatic architect of Opera Aloha’s Samuel Yee Memorial Opera House, though she pegs him as a ridiculous clown on their first meeting. First impressions are not necessarily correct when judging a person, but nor are second impressions!

4) Daphne Dee Bliss entraps Wyn into marriage by getting pregnant (or pretending to) with his twins. Wyn, who has vowed never to remarry, is conned by her and relents, as he loves children and is desperate for more after his were taken away by his ex in divorce.

5) Daphne Dee Bliss is caught for her lucrative crimes, thanks to her “friend” Kris Van Kampen’s cooperation with the FBI.

6) Umberto Strillo, the elderly, volatile Italian conductor who tries to sexually harass Mira, has a heart attack when he catches his young wife Angelina in flagrante delicto with the lead tenor in the opera.

7) Raleigh Richardson, the wunderkind repetiteur, and assistant conductor for Opera Aloha’s “La Traviata,” triumphs as Maestro Strillo’s last-minute replacement on the podium after he informs the aging maestro of his young wife’s affair with the tenor, causing the old guy’s heart attack when he confronts her.

8) Mira misses the dress rehearsal of “Traviata” due to sabotage, but does not press charges against the culprit when the Executive Director’s young son Scottie, tells Mira whom he saw entering Mira’s dressing room with a small cellophane-wrapped basket of chocolates, and after confronting the culprit, Mira learns why they did it.

9) Jake Sutherland, an opera-hating Vietnam vet and successful cookbook writer, transforms into an opera junkie after falling in love with Mira when he sees her perform onstage on opening night of “Traviata.”

10) Situational irony: Jake, waiting at the opera house’s stage door exit hoping to catch Mira and talk with her as she exits after the opening night’s performance, quickly ducks behind some bushes when he sees Daphne Dee’s convertible pull up and Wyn run outside to meet her. Jake is outraged as he watches the two engage in a lusty display and hears them arrange to meet after the opening night party because he realizes that Wyn is two-timing Mira, having learned from his friend Kris Van Kampen that Mira and Wyn had been heavily dating. Jake decides to save Mira from Wyn, but how to do this without appearing to stalk the dating couple?

[Evelyn Petros]

Assignment #2: Evelyn’s romantic comedy “Opera Aloha,” a satire on love & opera.

Sorry for the long hiatus. I’m now back in the land of the living, after a terribly painful case of Shingles. Not 100% yet but feeling much better. At least now, I can THINK again.

From doing this lesson, I learned that what is going on under the surface of a story is more important in keeping viewers hooked than what is merely on the surface, so I must be fully invested in exploring these layers, even though I find it difficult. That said, my script is going to be very complicated because there are so many characters and plots going on. I may not be up to it and/or may need to cut some layers. We’ll see.

Surface Story: After a dinner date that causes Mira Santiago to swear off men forever, she attends the New Year’s Eve party of her agent, Nigel Blasenfort, who threatens to drop her from his roster if she doesn’t accept a last-minute contract as a replacement for the lead soprano in Opera Aloha’s production of “La Traviata.” Mira needs the money to avoid bankruptcy and avoid temping nights at a Rockefeller Center law firm to make ends meet. She hopes the job in Honolulu’s tropical paradise will help her forget her latest romantic fiasco, though the role she will perform is the same one that nearly wrecked her career three years earlier in Omaha.

Plot Layers – Story beneath the story

There are two stories: 1) Mira’s career story; 2) Mira’s love story.

Major scheme revealed – Wynston I. Trapnell, the charismatic architect of Opera Aloha’s state-of-the-art opera house wants a casual romantic relationship with Mira. Mira resists but later jumps in despite a warning from her childhood friend Kristen Van Kampen, an artist in Maui, who wants to her to give her neighbor Jake, a successful cookbook writer, a chance at love with Mira.

Mysteries revealed – Four mysteries in NYC:

1) Who is La Nariz, the nickname Mira has given to the anonymous nosy neighbor who bangs on Mira’s apartment door whenever she practices singing her audition arias?

2) Is Mrs. Greenberg, Mira’s elderly, widowed next door neighbor as sweet and kind as she appears to be?

3) What will happen when Stanley Farber becomes Stefanie?

4) Why does the voice of the man who is temporarily staying in Mrs. Greenbaum’s apartment sound vaguely familiar to Mira, though she does not recognize him by his appearance?

Mysteries revealed – Several mysteries in Hawaii:

1) Who is the anonymous sender of tropical flowers, chocolates and poetry that follow Mira from Hawaii to Florida, to NYC?

2) Who injected a date rape drug into a bag of chocolates from the Women’s Guild of Opera Aloha that was placed on Mira’s makeup table in her backstage dressing room to sabotage her? And why does Mira not press charges when she learns who the culprit is?

3) How will Mira stop the elderly Italian conductor of the opera from sexually harassing her?

4) Who informs the elderly Maestro that his wife Angelina is having an affair with the lead tenor in the opera, causing him to have a heart attack when he confronts her?

Thought the story was one thing, but it is another – For those who consider opera a harmless ultra-serious, high-concept, elitist entertainment, I want to turn this idea on its head by writing a satire on love, life and opera.

Major shift in meaning – Opera as a blood sport.

Hidden history – Wyn, a lapsed Mormon, subconsciously punishes the women he romances for the heartbreak his ex-wife caused him after their divorce by getting full custody of their children and taking them back to Utah: he loves, then leaves the women in his life before they can leave him.

Hidden plans – 1) Mira plans to outwit the stage director’s lewd staging directions that would compromise her Catholic sensibilities and embarrass her in front of the opera audience, her friends, and Mira’s twin brother Phil and his family who fly to Honolulu for Mira’s opening night performance.

2) Daphne Dee Bliss entraps Wyn into marrying her. Knowing that he loves children, she deliberately gets pregnant by him.

3) Mrs. Greenberg gets out of frigid New York City and to Maui for the winter by trading homes with Jake who wants to be near Mira in NYC.

Major betrayal – After her opera performances in Hawaii, followed by a last-minute scheduled recital tour in Florida, Mira returns to NYC, where an invitation to Wyn’s and Daphne Dee Bliss’ wedding celebration awaits her, though Wyn lied that he’d never marry again. To add injury to insult, the postmark on the invitation shows that it was mailed from Honolulu the day after the wedding celebration!

Character Layers – identity beneath the identity

Secret identity – 1) In the final scene of Act Three, Jake is revealed to be the anonymous sender of tropical flowers, chocolates and romantic poetry that follow Mira from Hawaii to Florida, to NYC. He is also the handsome stranger who has traded homes with Mrs. Greenberg in NYC and who follows Mira to Vienna, Austria, ostensibly to do research for a book on the exquisite pastry desserts of Austria.

2) In the final scene of the series, Kris reveals that Mrs. Greenberg, who traded homes with Jake, is the mentally unbalanced person who slipped an obscene note under Mira’s apartment door, and who banged on her door whenever Mira sang Puccini arias.

3) But then, who is “La Nariz,” the secretive person who lives in the apartment across from Mira’s? Are there 2 crazies living on the 39^th floor in Mira’s building in NYC? (The identity of “La Nariz,” “The Nose,” will be revealed in year 2 of my series).

Character intrigue – 1) Daphne Dee Bliss is a criminal interior designer who preys on wealthy bachelors by renovating their homes for exorbitant fees and selling them fake art and antiques. The FBI is after her. Will they catch her? Kris Van Kampen, Mira’s childhood friend, does what she can to make that happen.

Hidden relationships and conspiracies – 1) Wyn and Daphne Dee are involved in a romantic relationship which Wyn keeps from Mira, though she finds out. 2) Jake falls in love with Mira and opera when he attends the opening night performance of La Traviata with Kris and is introduced to Mira backstage. Kris tells Jake that he has no chance with Mira because Mira is involved with Wyn. Later, loitering outside the Stage Entrance door in hopes of seeing Mira as she exits, Jake sees and overhears Daphne Dee (Jake’s ex) and Wyn making out near the opera’s stage door exit. Outraged that Wyn is two-timing Mira, Jake swear that he will save her from Wyn’s clutches, but that proves to be a difficult endeavor.

Hidden Character History – 1) Mira Santiago is a veteran of more than a few relationship failures. She has a special ritual that she enacts that involves plants when each relationship begins and ends.

2) Jake blames himself for the loss of his Vietnamese fiancée during the fall of Saigon, though he managed to save her mixed-race son, whisk him back to Hawaii and adopt him.

3) Daphne Dee Bliss was disowned by her Evangelical parents when she got pregnant as a teenager and had an abortion.

4) Mira’s brother, who is housing their sick and elderly aunt Miranda in Baltimore, has convinced the old woman to give him Power of Attorney so he can control her finances to his advantage and to Mira’s detriment.

Plot Surfaces:

Layer 1 – Mira gives up on love after a disastrous date, and with an empty performance calendar for the next three months, frets about having to temp at a NYC law firm to avoid bankruptcy and make ends meet.

Layer 2 – At Mira’s agent’s New Year’s Eve party at his East side townhouse, Mira’s agent summons her to his office and bullies her into accepting a last-minute contract to sing a role that nearly derailed her career three years before, by threatening to drop her from his roster if she refuses. She accepts. Afterwards, downstairs in Nigel’s elegant salon, Mira, upset by what has transpired minutes earlier in Nigel’s office upstairs, quarrels with a rival soprano and flings a glass of champagne in the woman’s face before being bundled up in her coat and hustled out to be driven home to pack for her flight to Honolulu later that morning.

Layer 3 – Arriving home at the Lincoln Center Arms Apartments, Mira has a run in with her building’s temperamental elevator and “La Nariz,” her nosy neighbor. She phones her brother in Baltimore and her childhood friend Kris in Maui to let them know she’s traveling to Honolulu. Does laundry, packs, gets no sleep. Flies to Honolulu fighting her fear of flying. In Honolulu, she’s picked up by Wynston I. Trapnell, the architect of Honolulu’s opera house and member of the Opera Aloha’s Board of Directors who drives her to her hotel.

Layer 4 – With only five days of rehearsal before the opening, Mira has a run in with the avant garde stage director who wants her to strip off all her clothes during her “Sempre Libera” aria. She enlists the help of the costume designer to thwart his plans. A coaching with the Italian conductor almost has Mira choking on her coloratura because of the Maestro’s extremely lethargic tempi. She plots with her friend from NYC, the wunderkind repetiteur and assistant conductor Raleigh Richardson on how to speed up the conductor’s tempi and thwarts the old Maestro’s sexual overture when he comes up behind her, puts his arms around her and whispers sweet nothings in her ear minutes before the singers’ orchestral rehearsal (“sitzplatz”) is to begin.

Layer 5 – One of Mira’s opera colleagues sabotages her by injecting a date rape drug into a bag of chocolates, one of which Mira eats and passes out, missing the dress rehearsal.

Layer 6 – Raleigh Richardson triumphs when he conducts the opening night performance of Traviata after Maestro Umberto Strillo suffers a heart attack when he catches his young wife Angelina in a tryst with the lead tenor.

Layer 7 – Jake shadows Wyn and Mira on two of their dates, getting into life endangering scrapes, including being chased by a bull in a field below a mountain that Wyn and Mira are climbing.

Character Surfaces:

Layer 1: Mira swears off men forever, but really wants the whole enchilada – career, marriage, family.

Layer 2: Mira revolts against her agent, who only seems to get her jobs as a substitute for ailing sopranos, though Mira rightly believes she deserves to be first choice. Opera Aloha patroness Sheila Yee helps Mira find new representation with professional connections Yee forged as a Gilbert and Sullivan performer in England a decade earlier.

Layer 3: ????

Layer 4: ????

Sorry, can’t concentrate further. I have to go take a nap now. Energy still not up to par.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 8 months ago by  Evelyn Petros.

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s BWTV/M1/L10/A1&2

Note from Evelyn: Back from “Grandma duty,” I promptly contracted a very painful case of Shingles! Horrible! I hope to distract myself from the pain with these lessons as I heal. To my fellow writers of a certain age, please get your Shingles vaccines updated! We got ours in 2016, which was 50% effective, but there is a newer, two-dose vaccine (2 months apart) that is 90% effective. Trust me, you DON’T want to get this disease! My hubby just got his first dose early this week, but I will have to wait 2 months after I am healed to get mine. Arrrrgh!

From doing this lesson, I learned that what is going on under the surface of a story is even more important in keeping viewers hooked than what is merely on the surface, so I must be fully invested in exploring these layers, even though I find it difficult. That said, my script is going to be very complicated because there are so many characters and plots going on. I may not be up to it and/or may need to cut some layers. We’ll see. This course is really challenging me, hopefully in a good way, though I admit I’ve been fighting with the idea of giving up. Lots of negative self-talk going on, that I’m trying to ignore, some of it age related. Wish me luck!

Assignment #1: “Big Little Lies” – Plot & Character Layers

Plot Surface: A murder occurs at an Elvis/Audrey Hepburn themed school fundraiser in Monterey where the parents of the school children are all suspects.

Layer 1: The identity of the victim is not revealed until the 7th episode of Season 1.

Layer 2: Nothing is as simple or perfect as it first appears to be in the relationships between the Monterey Five and within each of their families. Change occurs in all the relationships during the 2 seasons of the series.

Layer 3: At least 4 of the women have motives for the murder. Madeline & Jane have a plan to track down Jane’s rapist, the father of Ziggy.

Layer 4: Secret identity: Perry is the rapist father of Ziggy and abuser of Celeste. Max has followed in his father’s footsteps in abusing Amabella.

Layer 5: The marriages of Celeste, Madeline, Renata & Bonnie reveal conflicts.

Layer 6: Final episode of season 2 – the Monterey Five go together to the Police Station to confess their conspiracy to cover up the identity of the person (Bonnie) responsible for Perry’s death. Perry was the bad guy who raped Jane and physically, sexually and psychologically abused Celeste and deserved to die!

Layer 7: A 3rd season is in the works, in which I imagine we will learn what happens to Bonnie and the other Monterey women after their confession, and what happens to the women’s marriages. Will Bonnie & Nathan stay together? Will Renata divorce Gordon? Will Madeline & Ed’s reunion last? Will Abigail go to college? Will Jane find love?

• This reply was modified 2 years, 8 months ago by  Evelyn Petros.

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s BWTV/M1/L9/A1&2

Warning: Starting tomorrow, my hands will be full with “grandma duty” for two 3 and 6 year olds. I will return and pick up with M1/L10 on August 18th. Thanks for understanding!

What I learned from doing this lesson: Open loops are critically important in creating the intrigue that keeps series viewers binge watching. At the same time that I’m absorbing Hal’s lessons and doing the assignments to learn how to create a a bingeworthy series, I’m also working on my novel to plug holes. I had my opening and closing scenes down and some of the middle scenes, but a lot remained empty or only partially thought out. I realized that this is an opportunity to incorporate more intrigue and open loops into my novel during these lessons. The more open loops the better, and brainstorming, filling in the blanks, adding more intrigue, more open loops, more character development are helping me resolve some of the areas in the unfinished novel where I got stuck. I added a new inciting incident scene to the beginning by converting an overly long, quirky naarative into “showing” rather than “telling” through character actions and dialogues. The lessons are enabling me to see where I need to add more scenes with intrigue in the book so I can make it a page turner and the series bingeworthy. I’ve also been able to eliminate some “on the nose” dialogue from watching examples of series that fit Hal’s module of a bingeworthy show. I can’t wait to finish Module 1 and get to the module where we will be creating a series outline, but I need to be patient and go a step at a time so I don’t get ahead of myselfand make mistakes which I will need to spend time undoing later.

A1 – Open Loops in “Big Little Lies”

There are a myriad of questions and open loops in this series. Most if not all are answered bit by bit in years one and two of this series:

1)Who is the dead person?

2) Was the death a murder, like the detectives believe, or was it an accident? If it was murder, who killed Perry?

3) Who is harming little Amabella? Why won’t she tell?

4) Who is Jane’s rapist? Will she take revenge on him?

5) Will Jane start dating again or is she off men for good?

6) Will Ziggy tell Jane who the abuser of Amabella is?

7) Will Celeste admit she is a victim of marital violence? Will she leave Perry? Will he take revenge on her if she does leave?

8) Will Celeste tell Jane that her son Max is harming Amabella?

9) Will Celeste resume her career as a lawyer? Will Bonnie’s guilt cause her to commit suicide?

10) Will Bonnie confess that she pushed Perry to the police?

11) Will the Monterey Five confess their part in the coverup?

12) Will Perry’s mother prove that Celeste is an unfit mother, and get custody of their two children after her son’s death?

13)Will Madeline continue her affair with Joseph?

14) Will Madeline tell her husband Ed about the affair? How will Ed react?

15) Will Madeline’s marriage survive her affair?

16) Will Abigail go through with her crazy scheme of auctioning off her virginity for charity?

17) Will Abigail return to live with Madeline and Ed or stay with Nathan and Bonnie?

18) Will Gordon’s and Ed’s antipathy towards each other result in violence

19) Will Bonnie kill her ill mother in the hospital room?

20) Will Renata take revenge on her husband Gordon for his company crime that squandered all their finances?

21) Will Renata’s and Gordon’s marriage survive?

A2 – Open Loops in “Opera Aloha” by E.A. Petros

Mira Santiago

Big Loop Goals: (Love and Opera)

1) Will Mira triumph as Violetta in Opera Aloha’s production of “La Traviata,” or will she bomb again as she did in Omaha three years earlier?

2) Will Mira keep her promise to herself to stay away from romantic relationships, or will she succumb to temptation in the heated tropical atmosphere of Honolulu, Hawaii?

3) How will Mira deal with her agent’s bullying, her director’s obscene staging, and her conductor’s harassing behavior?

Consequences:

1) Will Mira get fired from her gig at Opera Aloha for defying the stage director?

2) How will Mira fend off the conductor’s advances and put him in his place? Will she be the one to inform him that his wife is cheating on him, and thus be the cause of his heart attack when he catches Angelina and her lover in flagrante delicto?

3) Will Mira’s dysfunctional romance radar change for the better by the end of the series?

Solving Problems:

1) What subterfuge will Mira engage to retain her modesty and “good girl” Catholic values?

2) Will Mira press charges against the saboteur who injected a date rape drug into the gift of chocolates and left it on her makeup table in her dressing room?

3) Will Mira discover the identity of the sender of tropical flowers, chocolates and poetry that follow her from Hawaii to NY, to Florida and to Vienna, Austria? How will she find this out?

4) Will Mira find herself a new agent?

5) Will Mira’s extreme fear of flying manifest itself on her flight to Vienna, Austria?

Relationships:

1) How will Mira’s relationship to Stanley Farber change when he becomes Stefanie Farber?

2) Will Mira’s relationship with Wyn end when she leaves Hawaii, or will it continue long-distance?

3) How will Mira react to the invitation to a wedding celebration she receives which was sent to her deliberately late so she can’t attend?

4) How will Mira react when she learns the identity of the anonymous sender of tropical flowers, chocolates and poetry that have followed her from Honolulu to New York, to Florida and finally, to Vienna Austria?

5) Will Mira give Jake a chance to get to know her and vice versa?

Danger/Survival/Risks

1) Mira was hired last-minute as a substitute with little opportunity for rehearsals before the opening night’s show. The last time she performed this opera three years ago, she was ill, and choked on the high C’s and final high E-flat on opening night. Under doctor’s orders, she had to cancel her other performances there. Will she bomb again when she sings the same role in Honolulu?

2) Mira is vulnerable to another heartbreak when she gets involved with Wyn.

3) Will Mira experience a major meltdown on her flight to Vienna when she realizes she forgot to pack the ebony and silver cross that she always brings with her and wears around her neck when traveling by air to prevent the planes she’s in from crashing?

• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: Corrected formatting irregularities

[Evelyn Petros]

Bingeworthy TV Series – M1/L8/A1&2

What I learned from doing this lesson: To create a bingeworthy series, a writer needs to construct a number of mysteries to keep viewers hooked and guessing, with a Big Picture Mystery in the beginning whose questions are fully answered at the end, and smaller mysteries that are revealed and solved a little at a time during the episodes to keep the series intriguing and to avoid losing viewers. The original novel “Opera Aloha” which I am using as source material for this series has quite a complicated plot and many mysteries, so I am filling in the blanks bit by bit, following Hal’s suggestions which are very helpful.

A1 – “Big Little Lies”

Mystery Type 1– Shocking Event = Big Picture Mystery: Someone commits a murder at the school fundraiser. Secret 1: Who is the victim? Secret 2: Who is the perpetrator? Investigation: Police detectives interview witnesses, the school’s principal, and some of the attendees to find out. The answer to Secret 1: revealed at the end of season 1. The Cover Up: The five friends who are witnesses to the murder concoct a lie to cover up the truth to protect their friend. The answer to Secret 2: revealed later in the second year’s series. A third year’s series, if there is one, will probably deal with what results after Bonnie confesses to the police and her friends confess to their lie to protect her.The open open loops would make a 3rd year of the series possible.

Mystery Type 2 – The “Over Time Mystery”: Small mystery #1 – Starting with the first day of school, Amabella is being harmed. Secret 1: Who hurt her? Secret 2: Why won’t Amabella tell the teacher and her parents who did it? Secret 3: Is there a connection between this Small Mystery and the Big Picture Mystery? Reveal: The answers to these questions are doled out by the writer over time.

Small Mystery #2: Jane is hiding something from her past. Secret 1: Who raped her? Secret 2: Is she going to kill the rapist with the gun she keeps in her bedroom?

Small mystery #3: Will Madeline lose her marriage after telling Ed about her cheating on him with Joseph?

(My confession: I watched the entire second season of this series and found it both shocking and unbelievable that the Tori character (wife of Joseph) blatantly propositions Ed for sex. IMHO the writer & director should have developed her character a bit more to foreshadow this event & make it more believable. Did they do that, but cut it from the series because of time restraints? It seemed to come out of the blue. That was the only misstep I detected.)

A2 – “Opera Aloha,” a rom com satire on life, love and opera” written by E.A. Petros

Big Picture Mystery: Will Mira Santiago succeed in a role that nearly wrecked her career three years earlier? How will she dodge with the mines tossed at her by the stage director & the conductor? Will Mira jump into a relationship with Wyn? Will the relationship end when she leaves Honolulu?

A. Shocking Event: Someone injects a date rape drug into chocolate truffles in a small cellophane bag labeled “With best wishes from the Opera Guild of Opera Aloha,” and places them on Mira’s makeup table in her dressing room backstage before the dress rehearsal of “La Traviata” to sabotage her. Mira eats one and passes out. The understudy must take her place. (Irony, since Mira is usually the one hired to substitute for ailing sopranos.)

B. Secret: The saboteur was going to leave the “gift” of chocolates in Mira’s dressing room on opening night but chickened out and left it on the day of the dress rehearsal instead, so Mira has to go onstage on opening night with little to no staging rehearsals.

C. Investigation: Melanie Hollik’s young son, Scottie, tells Mira he knows who left the chocolates in her dressing room, and Mira confronts the perpetrator who tearfully confesses.

D. Who, when, where, what, why & How: My plotting is very complicated and I’m still working out the answers to these questions.

E. Part Withheld: Mira empathizes with the motivation of the perp, tells them that if they had come to her and explained their circumstances, she would have feigned illness and allowed them to substitute for her in oneperformance. Mira forgives the perp without pressing charges and covers up the crime.

“Over Time Mystery”: 1) Who is “La Nariz” (“The Nose”), the nosy neighbor who lives on the same floor as Mira Santiago in NYC, who pounds on Mira’s door whenever she sings Puccini arias? Is it the same person who leaves an obscene note under Mira’s door?

2) Who is the mysterious sender of tropical flowers, romantic poetry, and chocolates that Mira receives after her performances in Honolulu, and which follow her from Hawaii to NYC, to Florida and finally to Vienna, Austria?

Small over time mysteries:

1) How does the elderly Italian conductor find out about the infidelity of his young wife, causing him to have a heart attack when he confronts her?

2) Will Daphne Dee Bliss get caught by the FBI for selling fake art and antiques to wealthy, unsuspecting bachelors? How will Mira find out about Wyn’s marriage to Daphne Dee?

3) What is Mira’s “Plant Cemetery?” Answer: it involves a ritual that Mira (who has mild OCD) enacts to document her love relationships. At the beginning of a relationship, she buys a plant, puts a label on it with the name of the beau and the date of their first date, and places it in her bedroom. When the relationship ends, she puts the date of the breakup on the label, takes the plant into the living room and deposits it behind the piano. She has quite a collection.

4) Will Stanley Farber be able to give his acting career a boost and perform the great classic female roles he loves after he transitions as Stefanie Farber? Will he and Mira meet up again after his transition, and how will Mira react? To be revealed in the 2nd year’s series.

5) What will happen to the estate of Mira’s Aunt Miranda after she dies? Will Mira and Phil inherit equally, or …? This will be revealed in the 2nd year’s series. (I know, I’m putting the cart before the horse here, but as I said above, my plotting is very complicated.)

Cover Up: ?????? I haven’t figured this out yet, but a cover up might not be needed. We’ll see.

Secret: Mrs. Greenbaum, Mira’s next door neighbor, does a “house swap” to escape NYC’s frigid winter, and answers Jake Sutherland’s ad for an apartment in NYC (so he can be near Mira).

Reveals: Mrs. Greenbaum has serious mental issues revealed toward the end of season 1.

WWWWW & How: Jake wants Mira to get to know him without scaring her away. His first step is to shape up, cut his hair, lose weight, see a speech pathologist to improve his voice, do research on the history of opera, change his clothing style, etc. He also turns into a big time opera fan. Mira doesn’t recognize him as the “hippy” she met backstage after Kris introduced them at her opening night performance, though she feels his voice sounds rather familiar.

Part Withheld: Mrs. Greenbaum is not the sweet little old neighbor she appears to be.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: I had to clean up some formatting and also added a sentence

[Evelyn Petros]

BWTV/M1/L7/Assignment 1 – Big Picture Empathy/Distress – “Big Little Lies”

This assignment helped me to learn how to make characters relatable to viewers by placing them in life situations of distress that cause them to act in certain ways, so we can empathize with them, but I think I’ve gotten too detail oriented at this stage.

Undeserved misfortune – Celeste keeps getting beaten up by Perry. Ed keeps getting goaded on by the passive aggressive behavior of Nathan who is projecting.

External character conflicts – Tori drives by Madeline’s house to see if she’s there or with Joseph. Tom banishes Gordon from his pub when Gordon harasses Jane and Madeline about Jane’s attack on Renata. Ed and Nathan spar at the fundraising party.

Plot intruding on life – Perry finds out Celeste has rented an apartment and plans to leave him. In the car he pleads with her not to go, saying he will change, but Celeste says it’s too late. Celeste flees from the car and goes to the party after Renata and others see them in the car. Celeste goes to Jane. Perry is killed while attacking Celeste and her friends, sparing Celeste from having to leave him and removing her boys from him. Brilliant directing = we see Perry lying dead at the bottom of the stairs, and the detective saying that it’s murder and that she thinks Celeste pushed him when he beat her, but we don’t see who it did until later, which increases the tension we feel as viewers. The murder was the big climax to the 1st year’s series.

Moral dilemmas – Should Ziggy tell Jane who really hurt Amabella? He finally points to the culprit in the school photo. Jane tells Celeste that Max did it and Celeste is shocked. Madeline feels guilty about her affair and resists telling Ed about it. Madeline tells Abigail she doesn’t know if she will allow her affair with Joseph to blow up her life. At the party, when Ed sings a song that illustrates how deeply he feels about her, Madeline runs off in tears because of her guilty feelings and because she knows how hurt he will be if he finds out about the affair.

Forced decisions they’d never make – Celeste finally decides to leave Perry after she learns that Max hurt Amabella. She confronts Perry about his violence making him a bad role model for their boys. She gets out of their car and runs to her friends at the party, but Perry follows her. Renata apologizes to Jane when she learns it was Max who hurt Amabella.

BWTV/M1/L7/Assignment 2 – Big Picture Empathy/Distress – “Opera Aloha”

Mira Santiago

A. Undeserved Misfortune: 1) As children, Mira and her twin brother were in a plane crash that killed their parents. 2) Mira’s boyfriend ends their relationship in a way that causes Mira to swear off men forever. 3) To sabotage Mira,someone injects a date rape drug into a box of chocolates from Opera Aloha’s Opera Guild and leaves them on Mira’smakeup table in her dressing room backstage. Mira eats one, passes out, and misses the dress rehearsal.

B. External Character Conflicts: 1) Mira fights with her agent over his bullying. 2) A fight with the stage director almost gets her fired. 3) Mira resists Wyn’s advances until ….

C. Plot intruding on life: 1) To save her reputation and career, Mira must fight the Stage Director, Conductor & Costume Designer over staging, musical tempi, costumes & wigs.

D. Moral Dilemmas: 1) Should she yield to temptation and have a romantic relationship with Wynston Trapnell? 2) Should she tell the elderly conductor that his young wife is cheating on him? 3) Should she use subterfuge to foil the director’s staging?

E. Forced decisions they’d never make: She’s forced to accept a job as a last-minute substitute in an opera role that could end her career.

Jake Sutherland:

A. Undeserved Misfortune: Every woman he has ever loved either dies or leaves him. At age 7 his mother took him to Bayreuth, Germany with her and made him sit through an entire Wagner Ring Cycle, which turned him off to operaforever, until ….

B. External Character Conflicts: He can’t bear it when a man deceives or takes advantage of a woman, so he takes an instant dislike to Wyn.

C. Plot intruding on life: Daphne Dee’s betrayal caused him to spiral into depression, lose self-confidence, drink too much & gain a lot of weight. Now, he must shape up.

D. Moral Dilemmas: Should he tell Mira that Wyn is two-timing her, and would she believe him? How can he save Mira from Wyn without offending her or being considered a stalker? What can he do to compete with Wyn for Mira’s love?

E. Forced decisions they’d never make: To go see an opera as a favor to his friend Kris.

Daphne Dee Bliss

A. Undeserved Misfortune: Her evangelical pastor father disowned her when she was 16 after she got pregnant and had an abortion.

B. External Character Conflicts: She tries to hurt Mira when she finds that Wyn is wooing her.

C. Plot intruding on life: The FBI is after her.

D. Moral Dilemmas: None. For her, the ends justify the means.

E. Forced decisions they’d never make: To give up her lucrative business as an interior designer targeting wealthy bachelors and selling them counterfeit art and antiques.

Wynston Irving Trapnell

A. Undeserved Misfortune: His first ex-wife divorced him and took their 2 kids back to the mainland. He divorced his 2nd wife because she wanted to have children. The third wife, an actress, ran off with a film director who promised to make her a star. He misses his kids, but volunteers at the Shriners Hospital entertaining sick children, in an effort to assuage his guilt and to make up for neglecting his own kids when he was married to wife #1.

B. External Character Conflicts: He likes to engage in brief, commitment-free affairs with opera singers in Honolulu because the singers are freelancers who are only there for a month and always leave after their gig with Opera Aloha is over.

C. Plot intruding on life: He is tricked into marriage by Daphne Dee who claims she is pregnant with twins by him.

D. Moral Dilemmas: Should he continue to lie to Mira that he is the anonymous sender of flowers, poems and chocolates that get delivered to her after her performances?

E. Forced decisions they’d never make: He gets married for the 4th time.

Kris Van Kampen

A. Undeserved Misfortune: Her wealthy ex, a plastic surgeon, refuses to pay child support.

B. External Character Conflicts: She despises Daphne Dee Bliss for taking advantage of Jake and becomes an informer for the FBI to help them nab her.

C. Plot intruding on life: Kris tries to warn Mira not to get involved with Wyn because of his bad track record with women, but it’s too late, as Mira is already infatuated with him. She tells Jake about Daphne Dee’s criminal enterprises, but he doesn’t believe her until she presents him with proof.

D. Moral Dilemmas: Should she tell Jake that the FBI is after Daphne Dee for her criminal enterprises?

E. Forced decisions they’d never make: She feels guilty about cooperating with the FBI to nail Jake’s ex, Daphne Dee.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: I corrected typos
• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: I corrected typos

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s M1-L6-A1&2 Assignments – What I learned from doing this assignment: Hal’s Character Relationship Map was very helpful in keeping all the major characters straight in my mind & will be useful in developing my projects. I will also use this map with the characters that Mira Santiago interacts with in Verdi’s opera “La Traviata.”

A1 – Main Character: Madeline Martha Mackenzie in “Big Little Lies”

Madeline & Renata:

Surface: Friends, but also enemies

Common Ground: Two mothers of kids in the same school & class who want the best for their kids.

Conflict: Rivals for social power in Monterey

History: A seesaw of one upmanship to see who will win each round.

Subtext: Renata, the “Alpha female,” wants to punish Maddie, the social conscience, who fights her.

Relationship Arc: Surface pleasantries devolve into outright hostilities before the two resolve their differences.

Madeline & Abigail:

Surface: Mother/Daughter

Common Ground: Typical mother/daughter relationship with power plays on both sides.

Conflict: Maddie tries to control Abigail’s choices to keep her from making the same mistakes she did. Abigail rebels, pushes her mother’s buttons as she strives to make her own decisions.

History: They love each other, but Madeline wants the status quo, while Abigail wants change and freedom to make her own choices and mistakes.

Subtext: Madeline fears she’s losing her daughter as she grows up, so tries to hold on tight, as Abigail stretches her wings farther and farther in a test of her mother’s love.

Relationship arc: Conflict causes Abigail to go and live with her dad, but she returns home, realizing that Madeline is not immortal, and that Madeline is a better role model for her than her dad is. Madeline realizes that Abigail still loves her but needs to stretch her wings.

Madeline & Ed

Surface: Husband & wife relationship with ups and downs.

Common Ground: Madeline and Ed enjoy a companionable marriage with similar family values, but she married partly for stability and security, as Ed is the total opposite of her first husband, Nathan. Ed deeply loves Madeline but feels he’s second best in her eyes and resents it.

Conflict: Maddie cheats on Ed with Joseph, but is ashamed and remorseful; she lies, and hides the affair from Ed. He is livid when he finds out, and retreats from the marriage for a time, not trusting her anymore. Madeline fears she has destroyed her marriage and family and sets about to repair the relationship.

History: Madeline and Ed are basically happy with their marriage arrangement, but each feels something is missing. Madeline holds back on sex with Ed, and he doesn’t know if she will ever be as intimate with him as he wants her to be. When he learns she has betrayed him, he mopes and retreats from the relationship until she convinces him she has changed and is 100% into their marriage.

Subtext: Madeline wants her marriage, herself, and her family to be perfect, though they aren’t. She fears losing control of her sexual impulses will end up hurting her family or losing them. Ed wants more intimacy (emotional and mental as well as sexual) but puts up with the lack for a while.

Relationship arc: Casual intimacy leads to internal conflict and betrayal. When Madeline realizes how much she loves Ed, she does everything she can to repair the relationship and regain his trust, and they both come out stronger in the end.

A2 – Evelyn’s Main Character Relationship Map – “Opera Aloha”

Mira Santiago & Wynston Irving Trapnell:

Surface: She’s amused by the charismatic charmer, but she’s wary of men because she’s just come off a romantic fiasco and vows celibacy. He’s attracted to her and wants to bed her. He sees her as a challenge.

Common Ground: They both love opera and Hawaii. Both are afflicted by past relationship failures; he describes himself as one of “The Walking Wounded,” and she has sworn off men.

Conflict: She wants love and security; he wants sex and fun with no strings.

History: They only just met, so there’s no history. “Love” at 2nd sight for her.

Subtext: A lot of what he says is “double entendre.” A lot of what she says is teasing back.

Relationship arc: A humorous start to their relationship, then full steam ahead, and finally, he does what he always does to lovers, punishes her by saying goodbye, though it’s really him punishing all the women in his life who hurt him, especially his ex-wives for divorcing him and getting custody of their kids.

Mira Santiago & Jake Sutherland:

Surface: He’s a successful cookbook writer. His good qualities are invisible to Mira when they meet. He is bowled over by her singing and personality.

Common Ground: Kris introduces them, hoping to matchmake. Mira & Jake share similar family values, if only Mira would give him a chance, but she’s too involved with Wyn to notice. Besides, Jake’s hippy appearance does not appeal to her.

Conflict: Opera is her life; Jake hates opera until the opening night performance of “La Traviata”. He is bowled over and tells Kris he’s in love, but Kris tells him he’s too late, that she’s already taken. Jake knows Wyn is bad news and tries to protect Mira without scaring her. Mira dodges Jake at every opportunity.

History: After learning that she and Wyn are an item, and witnessing Wyn’s two-timing of Mira with Daphne Dee Bliss, Jake sets out to save Mira, and woo her, but anonymously.

Subtext: Jake hides his love, because he’s ashamed he’s let himself go during the past year after Daphne Dee Bliss left him and he knows he needs to shape up.

Relationship arc: He transforms himself, gains confidence, and devises a scheme so Mira will get to know him. She doesn’t recognize him when they meet months later after his transformation, and though she thinks him kind and sweet, still reeling from her breakup with Wyn, she rejects Jake until almost the end of the first series, when she learns the identity of the mysterious sender of gifts that have been following her from Hawaii to New York, and from Florida to Vienna, Austria.

Mira Santiago & Daphne Dee Bliss

Surface: They meet at the opera fundraiser and have nothing in common. Daphne Dee Bliss is an interior designer from Texas with her own company. Her specialty is renovating homes and selling fake art and antiques to wealthy, unsuspecting bachelors.

Common Ground: Mira and Daphne Dee are both involved with Wyn, but Mira doesn’t know it.

Conflict: At the opera fundraiser at the Honolulu mansion of Opera Aloha patron Sheila Yee, Mira notices Daphne staring at her all evening, but has no idea that Daphne is her rival for Wyn. Jealous Daphne Dee “accidentally” pushes Mira into Yee’s swimming pool, ruining Mira’s concert gown.

History: No relationship until Daphne learns Wyn is romancing Mira and vows revenge.

Subtext: Daphne Dee fawns over Mira’s singing while plotting to lure Wyn away from her.

Relationship arc: Rivals for love.

Daphne Dee Bliss & Wynston Irving Trapnell:

Surface: Friends, but each other’s victim.

Common Ground: Wyn and Daphne Dee are colleagues, friends, and lovers. Wyn is the architect of Opera Aloha’s state-of-the-art opera house, and Daphne Dee is the opera house’s interior designer.

Conflict: She wants to marry him for his money. He wants her for sex, not marriage.

History: He’s worked with her on the opera house designs, admires her talents, some of which are in the bedroom. She prefers older men, but subconsciously punishes them instead of her father who disowned her when she was 16 for getting pregnant and having an abortion.

Subtext: Each tries to win for the wrong reasons.

Relationship arc: Colleagues to lovers to spouses. They truly deserve the misery they will bestow on each other.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: Corrected some typos

[Evelyn Petros]

I deleted this post because I placed it in the wrong Module. Sorry.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: I deleted this post because I posted the wrong assignment here

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s Assignments: BW TV – M1 – L5 – A1&2

What I learned doing this assignment: I need to think more deeply about each character, what motivates them, what triggers them, and how these cause them conflicts with other characters in a/my series. This was a difficult assignment for me. I don’t know if I’m up to it, but I’m going to keep going.

ASSIGNMENT 1 – “Big Little Lies”

Madeline Martha Mackenzie

A. Hope – hopes for fulfilment in her family life. Fear – fears she is losing control of her emotions & theconsequences to her family; fears not being needed by her daughters as they grow up and aren’t as dependent on her.

B. Motivation: Want – Wants excitement in her life; to be more than “just” a mother; feels that something is missing; Need – to feel needed by those she loves. Needs the security that marriage can/should provide; needs to feel competent to drown out feelings of inferiority because she did not go to college and has no “real” career.

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – Dissatisfaction with herself and her life. Public Mask – an activist, righting wrongs and fixing problems of others because she doesn’t know how to fix her own.

D. Weaknesses – Overly romanticized view of marriage causing a war between her head and her heart about marital expectations; low self esteem because she didn’t go to college. Gets too involved with other peoples problems since she doen’t know how to solve her own.

E. Triggers – Thoughts of exciting sexual experiences from her past with Joseph. Injustices trigger her actions. Tries to stop Abigail from making mistakes, some of which she herself made.

F. Coping Mechanism – Talks too much and too fast to cover up her sense of inadequacy. Fights injustices around her, but is conflicted and somewhat paralyzed by her own problems.

Celeste Wright

A. Hope – Hopes to cure her husband’s violence without having to break up their family. Fear – She fears that his violence will one day kill her, but denies and supresses it. She fears scandal if the town learns that she doesn’t have the picture-perfect perfect life she pretends to have.

B. Motivation: Want – To stay married to Perry because he’s a good father to their sons.

Need – To appear to others as the perfect wife and mother.

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – Shame for her victimhood. Public Mask – Denial of being a victim of marital violence.

D. Weaknesses – Blames herself for her husband’s volatility. Tries to protect Perry and excuse his violence against her. Feels she deserves his violent treatment of her. Puts her boys’ welfare above her own.

E. Triggers – The violence.

F. Coping Mechanism – Pretending that all is well and that she’s not hurt, and catering to Perry.

Jane Chapman

A. Hope – Hopes to put the rape behind her. Fear – That her parenting is harming her son.

B. Motivation: Want – To protect her son and give him a good life. Need – To feel whole and healthy.

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – Inner turmoil and seething emotions. Public Mask – Hides behind a mask of gentle sweetness.

D. Weaknesses – Feels she is damaged goods, and not in the same league as her affluent friends.

E. Triggers – Nightmares of the rape haunt her. Unjust accusations of her son as a bully.

F. Coping Mechanism – Running, dancing, listening to loud music, keeping a gun in her nightstand to try to work off her emotions and feel safe. Lies to her son to protect him from the trauma his father inflicted on her.

ASSIGNMENT 2 – “Opera Aloha” written by E.A. Petros

Mira Santiago (32)

A. Hope – She hopes to put her latest romantic fiasco behind her and become financially secure. Fear – that she’llwreck her career by singing the lead role in “La Traviata.” Fear of failure in both career and love life.

B. Motivation: Want – She wants the whole enchilada (career, marriage, family). Wants to be first choice for opera roles instead of always a substitute. Wants to be loved and appreciated.

Need – She needs well-paying opera gigs to avoid bandruptcy and not have to temp nights in law offices to make ends meet; she needs stability in her career and love relationships.

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – low self esteem, caused by her relationship failures and the competition she faces in her career as an opera singer. – Public Mask – wisecracking diva persona and antics to hide her fears and feelings of inferiority. After her latest romantic fiasco, vows celibacy and plays hard to get to protect herself.

D. Weaknesses – She no longer trusts her romantic instincts; has aviophobia (fear of flying) and claustrophobia (especially in elevators) due to a tragic event in her past. She can’t be around cats because she is highly allergic and asthmatic. She’s a chocoholic.

E. Triggers – Air turbulence in planes; being confined in elevators andother small spaces. Hates being manipulated by her agent; hates being asked to violate her morals & sensibilities onstage and off. Being around cats freaks her out, resulting in asthma attacks.

F. Coping Mechanism – Creates “scenes” to fight back when frustrated. Binges on chocolate when nervous or upset; relies on certain self-created religious rituals to protect herself and ward off disasters; uses deception to avoid violating her morals and get what she wants; vows celibacy after her latest romantic fiasco to avoid getting hurt again. Cries when emotional.

Jake Sutherland (38)

A. Hope – To overcome his depression and PTSD & get back into shape after Daphne Dee Bliss left him. To be a good father to his adopted Vietnamese son. Fear – That he’ll never love or be loved again.

B. Motivation: Want – Wants to be needed. Needs love. A bit of a “savior” mentality. –

Need – To nurture those he loves, through his cooking and caring acts. Needs to shape up and start liking himself again.

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – Guilt that he never does enough. Blames himself for the loss of his Vietnamese fiancé during the Vietnam War. Defensiveness. Public Mask – Bravado, overdoing.

D. Weaknesses – Somewhat obsessive compulsive. Goes overboard with his enthusiasms.

E. Triggers – Seeing women being mistreated by men triggers his “savior” mentality.

F. Coping Mechanism – Raises tropical flowers in his greenhouse, reads romance novels and writes love poetry when life becomes too much. Cooks, overeats, overdrinks, mopes alone.

Winston Irving Trapnell (40)

A. Hope – To have love affairs but avoid marriage. Fear – Fear that women in his life will abandon him. Fear of the consequences of another divorce to his finances. Fear that women are just after his money.

B. Motivation: Want – To be unencumbered. Likes children, as long as they aren’t his. Need – Needs to have a woman in his life, but only if it’s short term and with no commitments.

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – Shell-shocked by his three divorces. Describes himself as one of “The Walking Wounded.” Public Mask – Charming, happy, carefree bachelor.

D. Weaknesses – Loves opera and soprano voices.

E. Triggers – Romantic commitments, so he’s always the dumper and not the dumpee.

F. Coping Mechanism – Works off emotions by playing tennis & golf, riding horses, mountain climbing, running marathons, racing cars. Considers dating a sport. Analyzes and rationalizes.

Daphne Dee Bliss (24)

A. Hope – To be rich. Fear – Fear of abandonment by men, so she is always the dumper, and never the dumpee.

B. Motivation: Want – She wants to be rich and at the top of her career. Need – Money, fame.

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – Jealousy, distrust. Public Mask – Sweet, carefree, charming .

D. Weaknesses – Uses sex to entrap men. Lies, schemes & covers them up.

E. Triggers – Competition with other women for the men she loves.

F. Coping Mechanism – Deception: subconsciously punishes her parents for disowning her, by seeking out older, wealthy bachelors, causing them to fall in love with her and taking advantage of them financially, thinking she can get away with it. Attacks rivals using passive aggression.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 9 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: I had forgotten to add Daphne Dee Bliss's Need, so I made the correction

[Evelyn Petros]

Bingeworthy TV Series – M1/L4/A2

What I learned from this assignment: How to add intrigue to the main characters in my show. However, I need to be careful not to distract from the main journey of my main character, Mira Santiago, so I may have to eliminate some stuff. (Hoping that it’s easier to delete stuff than to add stuff? Or, some of the intrigue can come to fruition in the 2nd year of the series?)

Evelyn’s Inner Circle Intriguing Characters in “Opera Aloha”

Mira Santiago

Role: An out-of-work NYC opera singer reeling from romantic letdowns and incipient bankruptcy, is forced to accept a last-minute gig to sing the leading role in an opera that nearly wrecked her career three years earlier.

Hidden Agenda: To save her professional reputation, her morals, and her vocal technique, she must defy the stage director’s risqué staging, and circumvent the volatile conductor’s lethargic tempi.

Competition: Mira takes revenge on a soprano rival who sabotages her.

Conspiracies: : Mira enlists costume designer and assistant conductor to help her save her professional reputation.

Secrets: Underneath the diva behavior, she’s a woman with a good heart.

Deception: She deceives the stage director. She discovers that the wife of the conductor is cheating on him and sends him an anonymous note that has repercussions.

Wound: The trauma of surviving a plane crash with her brother that killed their parents when they were kids left Mira with aviophobia and claustrophobia—she hates planes and elevators.

Secret Identity: When going makeup-free, Mira is often mistaken for a teenager.

Jake Sutherland

Role: Successful cookbook writer, Vietnam vet and foster father who has let himself go after the end of his last love affair.

Hidden Agenda: He acts to save the woman he loves from the clutches of a lothario, but must do it incognito, so he won’t offend her or be accused of stalking.

Competition: He competes with Wynston Irving Trapnell for Mira’s love.

Conspiracies: He answers an ad to swap homes with one of Mira’s neighbors in NYC so he can be close to her.

Secrets: He blames himself for the loss of his Vietnamese fiancée in 1975 during the fall of Saigon, though he was able to save her son and adopt him. He hates opera because his mother made him sit through an entire Wagner “Ring Cycle”in Bayreuth, Germany when he was a boy.

Deception: He undergoes a physical makeover but won’t tell his friend Kris Van Kampen why.

Wound: He blames himself, a veteran Army helicopter pilot in Vietnam, for failing to spirit his Vietnamese fiancé out of Saigon in 1975, though he was able to save her son and adopt him.

Secret Identity: He’s the anonymous sender of flowers, chocolates and poetry that follow Mira from Hawaii to NYC to Florida and finally to Vienna, Austria.

Wynston Irving Trapnell (“Wyn”)

Role: The charismatic architect of Opera Aloha’s Samuel Yee Memorial Opera House in Honolulu; a bachelor.

Hidden Agenda: He collects opera singers for sport.

Competition: He’s not aware of any competition until Mira starts receiving gifts (flowers, poetry & chocolates) after her performances.

Conspiracies: ?????

Secrets: All three of his ex-wives divorced him and moved away with their children.

Deception: He deceives Mira about his relationship with Daphne Dee Bliss, and lets Mira think he is the one who is sending her love poetry, flowers and chocolate.

Wound: His mother abandoned his family when Wyn was a boy leaving him with a fear of abandonement by the women in his life. All three ex-wives divorced him, taking their kids with them and leaving him emotionally wounded and subconsciously punishing his lovers. He leaves them before they can leave him.

Secret Identity: He has a soft spot for sick children and volunteers at Honolulu’s Shriner’s Hospital, entertaining them as Dr. Dim Wit, the Clown.

Daphne Dee Bliss

Role: A predatory young interior designer from Houston with clients on Oahu and Maui.

Hidden Agenda: She’s a fraudster who targets wealthy bachelors.

Competition: She’s in competition with Mira for Wyn’s attention.

Conspiracies: She’s part owner of a Honolulu gallery that sells fake art and antiques to wealthy, unsuspecting bachelors.

Secrets: She moved to Hawaii after her parents disowned her when she was a teen.

Deception: She uses her feminine wiles to worm her way into the affections of wealthy, unsuspeting bachelors older than her whose homes need renovations and furnishings, and bilks them out of thousands of $$$$$$.

Wound: Getting pregnant and having an abortion caused her religious parents in Houston to disown her.

Secret Identity: She’s a barracuda pretending to be a sweetheart.

Kris Van Kampen

Role: Mira’s best friend since their Catholic School days in Baltimore. She’s an artist and owner of the Purple Orchid Gallery in Kahului, Maui; a divorcée and mother of three, now living with her kids and her common-law rancher husband in Hana, Maui.

Hidden Agenda: She tries to play matchmaker to Jake and Mira, but her efforts fail, or so she thinks.

Competition: none

Conspiracies: She’s working with her FBI agent brother-in-law to nail Daphne Dee Bliss for unethical business practices. She’s suing her ex-husband for child support.

Secrets: She’s serving as an informant for the FBI on their case against Daphne Dee Bliss.

Deception: She pretended to be Daphne Dee’s friend while gathering evidence against her.

Wound: Her ex, Dr. Jeffrey Skinner, a leading Honolulu dermatologist and cosmetic surgeon, is not sending child support for their 2 kids, Sean and Susie, and is filing for custody which terrifies her.

Seret Identity: She’s an FBI informant.

Nigel Blasenfort

Role: Mira’s agent; the founder and President of Blasenfort Artists Management, Inc. in NYC.

Hidden Agenda: He resorts to lies, bribery and other unethical conduct to steal clients from other NY agents.

Competition: Agents in every agency for performing artists in NYC.

Conspiracies: ???

Secrets: He tries to keep his illegal Italian immigrant lover from being deported by the US immigration authorities. His business is foundering because of his extravagant lifestyle.

Deception: He lies to Melanie Hollik, the General Director of Opera Aloha, and to his clients for profit.

Wound: He comes from an impoverished background in England’s coal country and is trying to make up for it ASAP.

Secret Identity: A pirate in the musical world.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 10 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: I had forgotten to add what I learned from doing this lesson

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s Assignment for M1/L4/A#1 – Big Little Lies

In doing this assignment I learned that in a bingeworthy series, each episode should reveal a little more of each character’s lives, like pieces in a puzzle, to create intrigue. What characters say about each other is also important in revealing character. Some of the puzzle pieces I noticed in Episodes 1-4 follow:

Hidden Agendas: E2 – What is the reason Jane choose Monterey as the place to relocate with Ziggy? We don’t yet know. E4- Why is Chloe accessing her mother Madeline’s cell phone? Will she be spying on her mom’s messages in future episodes? E4 – What is Jane planning to do with a gun and target practice? Is she using those to protect herself and Ziggy, or is she planning murder? E4 – After Bonnie’s yoga class Ed tells Bonnie intimate things, e.g., that he loves sweat on women. Why does he say this? Is he hitting on her? E4 – Why does Amabella lie to her teacher who thinks Amabella is still being abused? Is she protecting someone?

Competition: E1 & E4 – Madeline’s jealousy of Bonnie revealed. E2 – War between Madeline and Renata revealed. E2 – Ed & Nathan’s macho competition during arguments revealed. E4 – Madeline’s jealousy of Bonnie is partly over how alive Bonnie is while managing her life, work, and household, and how dissatisfied Madeline is with her life.

Conspiracy: E2 – Madeline & Celeste think they have found out the identity of Jane’s rapist and plan to help Jane confront him.

Secrets: E1 – Ed says Madeline is drawn to damaged people and that Celeste is damaged.

E2 – Ed tells Nathan he was a bullied child and that Madeline’s father abandoned her and her brothers, he also tells this to Bonnie in E4. E3 – Madeline’s affair with Joseph a year before is revealed, and that she cheated on Ed with him. E3 – Perry tells marriage counselor that he fears being run through (abandoned) by Celeste. E3 – Celeste reveals the dirty secret of angry sex between her & Perry to marriage counselor. E4 – Jane won’t tell Ziggy the name of his father. E4 – Perry reveals that Celeste fell apart emotionally during her previous law career. E4 – Celeste tells Madeline that mothering is not enough for her, and Madeline admits the same. E3 & 4 – Jane tells Celeste about the rape that resulted in Ziggy. E4 – Bonnie says to Ed “We all have baggage” but doesn’t reveal hers. E4 – Jane tells Madeline she would recognize her rapist from his voice and smell! (I bet we’ll see this actually happen in a future episode.)

Deception: E4 – Jane lies to Ziggy about his father to “protect” him from the ugliness. E4 – Madeline lies to Ed when he asks what she is thinking about and does not tell Ed about her recent “kissing incident” with Joseph and her conflicted feelings toward him. E4 – Madeline tells Celeste a sanitized version of her “incident” with Joseph, but Celeste figures out what really happened. E4 – Perry and Celeste hide Perry’s abuse from their 2 boys. E1-4 – Perry constantly gaslights Celeste as a power ploy.

Wound: E2 – Madeline’s wound (revealed by Ed) that her father and first husband (Nathan) abandoned her, and she fears her 2 daughters will abandon her when they grow up. A3&4 – Jane’s wound is the rape. Ziggy’s wound is he feels like he’s not like the other kids at school because he doesn’t have a father and doesn’t know why his Mom moved to Monterey.

Secret Identity: E1 – Who is Amabella’s attacker? E4 – Ed loves to dress up in costumes (vampire & Elvis). Is it a fetish? E4 – Madeline has a secret Facebook profile & her alias is “God.” E3 & 4 – who is Jane’s rapist? (I’m thinking it’s Perry. So far, Perry seems to be the the overtly violent one in this series, or is that too obvious? Hmmm, if Perry is the criminal, then maybe Ziggy is Amabella’s attacker, since he is the carrier of Perry’s “demon seed?” And maybe Ziggy finds out who his father is & takes Jane’s gun and kills him? I don’t think he would do this, but I think the identity of the rapist has something to do with the shoe prints we keep seeing on the sandy beach. I have only watched the first 4 episodes so far, so I don’t know.)

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s Bingeworthy TV/Module 1/Lesson 3/Assignment 2

What I learned from doing this assignment: I need to add more intriguing layers to my main characters. A quartet of mismatched lovers playing musical chairs may sell this series:

MIRA SANTIAGO

A. Role: A mouthy, NYC-based, Mexican American opera singer with a string of romantic flops and a dwindling bank account who wants the whole enchilada (career, marriage, kids) but finds her goals elusive.

Love Journey: She starts off repeating her pattern of picking the wrong man, but ends up wiser, and with a better understanding of what real love means.

Career Journey: She starts as a pawn of her unscrupulous agent but ends up as the agent of her own operatic career.

B. Unique purpose/expertise: she’s a fine singer/actress but is tired of stepping in last minute to save a show! She wants to be first choice in both love and career!

C. Intrigue/The Secret/s beneath the surface: 1) Her fear of flying comes from a tragedy in her past and requires her to perform certain rituals to keep the planes she’s in from crashing.

2) She keeps track of her romantic relationships with a certain ritual that involves houseplants.

3) Her identity is so wrapped up in her career as an opera singer that she fears without ‘The Voice’ she would be too much like everyone else. Will ‘The Voice’ stand up to the pressure?

D. Moral Issue: Can she protect her moral sensibilities and also avoid getting fired?

E. Unpredictable/What will she do next? Will she successfully dodge musical and theatrical grenades lobbed at her by a verbally abusive conductor, an avant guard director, and a sabotaging cast member? If so, how? Will she discover the identity of the mystery person who’s been sending gifts that follow her from Hawaii to Florida, from New York City to Vienna, Austria? Will she also discover the identity of “La Nariz,” the nosy resident who lives in the apartment across from hers in NYC who’s been disrupting her practicing?

F. Empathetic: Why do we care? Because we may know or might even be a complicated human like Mira, who wants the whole enchilada but is having a hard time getting it. Up against career and romantic challenges, we don’t want Mira to make another romantic mistake, and we want her to win!

JAKE SUTHERLAND:

A. Role: a diamond-in-the-rough, opera-hating Vietnam Vet, successful cookbook writer, foster father of a Vietnamese teen; Kris’ friend & neighbor in Hana, Maui.

Journey: At the start, Jake blames himself and his PTSD for the breakup of his relationship with Daphne Dee Bliss. Mourning the loss for a year, he has let himself go, physically and emotionally. By the end of the series, he undergoes a self-imposed transformation to save the woman he loves from making a terrible mistake, in the process becoming an opera fanatic.

B. Unique purpose/expertise: Jake is an expert chef who will do almost anything for those he loves. He is meticulous, or as Kris describes him, obsessive compulsive when it comes to work, home, and his relationships with women. But when is it all too much?

C. Intrigue/The Secret beneath the surface: He blames himself for the tragic loss of his Vietnamese fiancée during the fall of Saigon in 1975 and tries to be a good father to her son.

D. Moral Issue: What he is doing for the next woman he loves might be considered borderline stalking, so he must tread a fine line to not offend, but will he succeed?

E. Unpredictable/What will he do next? To what lengths will he go in his wooing? His shenanigans get him into several scrapes that nearly cost him his life, including getting chased by a bull at the foot of a mountain overlooking Kailua.

F. Empathetic: Why do we care? Because despite his flaws, Jake’s a good-hearted soul whose teddy-bear eyes and romantic nature are irresistible. We want to see him shape up and find happiness.

DAPHNE DEE BLISS: A predatory interior designer, art & antiques dealer from Houston.

A. Role: A major blister to any man who falls in love with her.

B. Unique purpose/expertise: She uses her expert interior design and sales skills to target bachelors with deep pockets in need of home renovations and furnishings.

C. Intrigue/The Secret beneath the surface: The antiques and art she sells are fakes, and the FBI is on to her.

D. Moral Issue: She has none. She adores using her feminine wiles to get what she wants.

E. Unpredictable/What will she do next? After she’s done with Jake, who will be her next victim? And what will she do to female rivals?

F. Empathetic: Why do we care? We are amused and/or outraged at her antics and want to see the bad girl caught.

WYNSTON IRVING TRAPNELL (“Wyn”) – the charismatic architect of Opera Aloha’s Samuel Yee Memorial Opera House in Honolulu; a jock whose favorite sport is collecting opera sopranos.

A. Role & Journey: he goes from being the honeypot that attracts women, to getting his just desserts.

B. Unique purpose/expertise: Besides his architectural expertise, he’s brilliant at entrapping women in his web and reeling them in, and when they’re caught …wham!

C. Intrigue/The Secret beneath the surface: He’s a serial bridegroom who’s been married 3 times already and all three divorced him.

D. Moral Issue: All’s fair in love and war, no?

E. Unpredictable/What will he do next? Good question.

F. Empathetic: Why do we care? We want to see his karma catch up with him.

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s Assignment # 1 – Characters that sell a show & what makes them intriguing

Doing this assignment, I learned that doling out a character’s secrets and sins little little by little in each episode and making the character at times unpredictable in their actions creates more intrigue, suspense & bingeworthiness than showing everything they’ve got early in the series, or all at once. Character complexity is what we are after.

Big Little Lies (S1/E3)

I see that the writer of this series is developing reasons why the characters in the show all have motives for murder. But who’s the victim? To be revealed in the final episode? I found many of the characters in this series to be intriguing, but IMO the most intriguing ones so far were the three I list below. I don’t include Renata because, though interesting, she is too “out there” expressing her emotions (mainly rage, “on the nose”) too consistently, especially relative to the abuse suffered by her little girl, but perhaps we’ll discover more layers of her character in later episodes.

Madeline Martha Mackenzie

A. Role: She’s like ‘Martha’ in the Bible, a woman who is always doing things for others and trying to right wrongs. A stay-at-home Mom/theater volunteer with a “picture-perfect life” except for bland sex & fears of losing her daughtersas they grow up and fly the nest, needs “causes”’ & excitement in her life. She is a catalyst for other people’s actions.

B. Unique purpose/Expertise: She’s a “fixer.” Empathetic, with strong opinions, she tries to fix problems in her close circle of family & friends perhaps to avoid facing/solving her own.

C. Intrigue/The secret beneath the surface: the 3rd episode reveals her passionate feelings for the man she broke up with before marrying her husband Ed and settling for a marriage that is emotionally and financially stable but lacking in romantic thrills & excitement. She feels she’s missing something.

D. Moral Issue: Conflicted, guilty & horrified for cheating on her husband, she also blames herself for causing Joseph’s car accident. She doesn’t want anyone to know about her past with him, or her present “indiscretion” for fear of hurting her family and giving ammunition to gossips who would ruin her prominent social standing in Monterey.

E. Unpredictable/What will they do next: Will she let herself go with her passionate feelings for Joseph and risk her marriage, or keep fighting them and make herself more nervous and high-strung than she already is? Will she cause trouble by arranging the investigative visit to the interior designer to determine whether he is Jane’s rapist?

F. Empathetic: Why do we care? Because she’s a kind and friendly woman with good intentions, though her “good deeds” often backfire.

Celeste Wright

A. Role: This gorgeous woman is the victim and enabler of an abusive husband. She’s given up her profession for her family and is trapped in a violent marriage which she hides for fear that leaving will negatively impact her children’s lives.

B. Unique purpose/Expertise: She has legal skills she is starting to resurrect which could help restore her self-respect and give her courage to face the sordid facts of her marriage and do something about it. But will she use these skills to help herself?

C. Intrigue/The secret beneath the surface: In denial about the seriousness of her husband’s violence and its impact on her and her kids, she won’t admit that she fears he might kill her. The secret is very gently dragged out of her by the couple’s marriage counselor, who sees that Celeste is protecting her husband by accepting blame for his abuse and for hitting him back.

D. Moral Issue: Should she continue to accept her husband’s abuse, or leave him and strike out on her own with her kids, which terrifies her?

E. Unpredictable/What will they do next: How long will she continue to try to “protect” Perry? Will she resurrect her career and become less dependent on her husband? Will she demand that he respect her by stopping his psychological, verbal, and physical abuse? Will she stop blaming herself, and accept the consequences of leaving? Or will she kill him if his abuse escalates, or if it impacts her two boys?

F. Why do we care: No one wants to see husbands abuse their wives physically, emotionally, or verbally!

Jane Chapman

A. Role: She’s one of the walking wounded, the mysterious single mother, a waif and an outsider with hidden trauma, obviously not rich, who arrives in Monterey with unknown motives to start a new life with her son.

B. Unique purpose/Expertise: This emotionally frail, soft-spoken young woman is trying hard to fight off her demons by dancing, running, and practicing at a shooting range.

C. Intrigue/The secret beneath the surface: Since she’s not working full-time, where is she getting the money to support herself and her little son? From her mother, or from the rapist? And does he live in Monterey? Is that why she moved there? She reveals the secret of her rape at the hands of Ziggy’s father to someone she trusts and who is sort of a mother figure to her—Madeline. But why does she have a gun? Is it for protection, or is she planning to kill someone?

D. Moral Issue: She loves her new friends, Madeline & Celeste, but Renata hates her, as do other mothers whose kids go to school with Ziggy and accuse him of bullying and physical abuse, so should she leave Monterey, or stay where the hateful atmosphere could worsen?

E. Unpredictable/What will they do next? Will Jane move away or stay in Monterey where her son is accused of abusing a little girl? Will she try to kill the man who raped her when she finds out who he is? Will she punish Ziggy if she learns he did harm Amabella?

F. Why do we care: She didn’t deserve to be raped, one of the worst things that can happen to a woman. No woman deserves that.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 10 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: My formatting was screwed up. I had to correct it

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn’s Lesson 1 Assignment – Bingeworthy TV Show

From this assignment I learned how to start analyzing the first episode of a bingeworthy TV series (using Hal’s 5-Star Points) to find out what makes it bingeworthy.

I was not familiar with any of the shows on our list, but had read the novel “Handmaid’s Tale”, so I started watching the first episode of that series, but stopped after a few scenes because the film makers had done such a good job with the traumatic, graphic visuals, that I had to escape!

I then searched the list for a comedy, because I am writing one and was curious to see how other writers had done it. Not finding any, I focused on a series whose cast features actors whose work I know and admire. After watching the first episode of BIG LITTLE LIES, starring Nicole Kidman and Reese Witherspoon, I was hooked. After watching it through once, I looked at the Scene Breakdowns and noted there were 18 scenes in this 1^st episode, then watched the episode again. The gorgeous shot of scenery of Monterey at the beginning nailing down the location hooked me. Theimage of a gun that appears during the opening credits fore-shadows the genre of the show, a crime drama in a domestic setting.

BIG LITTLE LIES – 5-Star Points

1) Big Picture Hook – in the wealthy community of Monterey, CA, the parents of children attending an elementary school are suspects in a murder that occurs at the school’s fundraising event, a fancy costume ball.

2) Amazing and intriguing Characters – 5 families of mothers, fathers, and children in intruiging relationships witheach other.

Family #1 – The Mackenzies

Madeline Martha Mackenzie – a twice married, career-thwarted, extroverted stay-at-home Mom of two who volunteers at a community theater. Her 2 kids – adorable, cheeky Chloe Mackenzie, a first grader & Abigail Carlson, a typical, rebellious teen who thinks she knows who she is, and exercises her “independence” by pushing her mother’s buttons.

Ed Mackenzie – Madeline’s 2nd husband, a seemingly loving, laid-back, computer/software engineer & CEO of a startup company. So far, he seems a nice guy.

Family #2 – The Chapmans

Jane Chapman – new in town; a single Mom who feels she doesn’t fit in, and may be hiding some trauma in her past; part-time bookkeeper & mother to Ziggy, an angelic looking little boy (whose father is not named) accused of choking a little girl in his class, though he denies it.

Family #3 – The Wrights

Celeste Wright – a gorgeous (stay-at-home?) mother of twin boys; wife of Perry Wright, a handsy, somewhat overbearing corporate type who likes playing rough with their kids. A Big Red Flag in Scene 15! Yikes! Is Perry an abuser?

Family #4 – The Kleins

Renata Klein – a successful business woman, mother of Amabella Klein, the first-grader who was choked at school. Gordon Klein, a business man.

Family #5 – The Carlsons

Bonnie Carlson – a yoga teacher, artsy, New Age, bohemian, in a mixed marriage with Madeline’s ex, Nathan Carlson; mother of mixed-race daughter, Skye Carlson.

3) Empathy/distress:

The show’s writers and directors used techniques that made me empathize with multiple characters:

a) With down-to-earth, level-headed, kind, friendly Madeline for having to deal with her rebellious teen daughterAbigail & for sacrificing career goals to raise her family.

b) With Jane, a stranger in town & part-time bookkeeper suffering from low self-esteem or past trauma while trying to do her best for her son, Ziggy.

c) With little Amabella, who was choked by a classmate on the first day of school.

d) With Ziggy, who may have been wrongly accused of choking her.

e) With Renata who overreacts to protect her daughter Amabella from the kid who hurt her, and who believes her friends resent her for her successful career.

g) With Celeste for having her bodily boundaries broached aggressively twice in this first episode (once playfully &once violently) by her husband Perry. (The guy gives me the creeps!)

h) With Bonnie Carlson, a seemingly nice person who is disliked by Madeline because she married Nathan Carlson, Madeline’s ex and had a daughter, Skye Carlson with him.

So far, several of the female characters seem to be in various stages of distress for various reasons, but the men, not so much. Hmmmmm, interesting.

4) Layers/Open Loops: Who is the murder victim at the costume ball? Who is the murderer? Why did the killer/s killthe victim? Is Ziggy lying when he denied choking Renata’s little girl Ammabella? If Ziggy’s telling the truth, then who did the choking? A big red flag for me was Perry Wright’s violent reaction to his wife Celeste when he forbidsher to allow their 2 boys to befriend Ziggy and she calls him on it. Is he a domestic abuser? Is Ziggy’s Mom, Jane Chapman, as nice as fragile as she seems? What is she hiding in her background that would make her need to hide a gun under her pillow?

5) Inviting Obsession: In this first episode, lots of unanswered questions in my head about the characters kept me hooked and desperate to learn more about the dynamics and conflicts within the families, their interpersonal relationships with their children and their friends! Lots seems to be going on under the surface. For example, are the snarky comments against Madeline by people interviewed about the murder a red herring, or do the filmakers want to make the viewers think that Madeline is capable of murder? What’s the conflict between Jane and her mother all about? It was hard to hear what they were arguing about. Does Perry have an anger problem that makes him lash out habituallyat Celeste to control her?

[Evelyn Petros]

Bingeworthy TV Series – Module 1, Lesson 2/Assignments 2 & 1

Evelyn’s Assignment #2: The Three Character Circles in my Bingeworthy rom com Serial TV Show

“Opera Aloha” by E.A. Petros – my unfinished novel is the source material for my show.

In doing this assignment I learned that I am on the right track with creating three tiers of characters for my project, but there are too many, which costs $, so I may have to delete some. I finally figured out where to post my assignments. Sorry it took so long!

Plot line: an (not so) innocent on a mission in a strange world

An out-of-work opera singer reeling from money problems & romantic fiascos, is forced to fly to Hawaii to perform a role that nearly wrecked her career 3 years earlier.

A. Main Character Circle:

MIRA SANTIAGO – a NYC Mexican-American opera singer from Baltimore with a string of romantic flops & a dwindling bank account wants the whole enchilada (career, marriage, kids) but finds her goals elusive.

KRIS VAN KAMPEN – Mira’s childhood friend, now an artist and gallery owner in Hana, Maui, lives with her rancher common-law husband and 3 kids; ex-wife of Dr. Jeffrey Skinner.

JAKE SUTHERLAND – a diamond-in-the-rough, opera-hating Vietnam Vet, cookbook writer, and foster father of a Vietnamese teen; Kris’ neighbor in Hana, the brother she never had.

WYNSTON IRVING TRAPNELL (“Wyn”) – the charismatic architect of Opera Aloha’s Samuel Yee Memorial Opera House in Honolulu.

NIGEL BLASENFORT – Mira’s agent, the British-born Founder and President of Blasenfort Artists Management, Inc. (BAMI) in NYC.

B. Connected Circle:

STANLEY FARBER (“Stan) – a troubled NY actor; Mira’s “boyfriend” of 3 months.

FELIPE SANTIAGO (“Phil”) – Mira’s twin brother, a Baltimore TV sportscaster.

TIZIANO MAGNAVACA (“Tizo”) – Nigel’s Italian lover and general factotum.

MRS. GREENBAUM – Mira’s sweet old widowed next-door-neighbor in NYC; or is she?

“LA NARIZ” (“The Nose”) – Mira’s nickname for the mysterious, secretive, nosy tenant living across the hall from her in NYC.

SAMMY SANCHEZ – the Night Concierge at the Lincoln Center Arms Apartments in NYC.

ELSA VON REVENTLOW – Mira’s chief soprano rival.

GARY FUCHIGAMI – the Receptionist at Honolulu’s Ala Wai Palace Hotel.

MELANIE HOLLIK – General Director of Opera Aloha; mother of Scottie.

RALEIGH RICHARDSON – Mira’s wunderkind African-American NYC coach & accompanist, hired by Opera Aloha as assistant conductor for “La Traviata.”

HANS-DIETER GUTTERMUTH – avant garde East German stage director of “Traviata.”

YU LAN Wang – the set and costume designer;” a Shanghai refugee & Mom of Lily.

UMBERTO STRILLO – the aging Sicilian conductor of “La Traviata.”

SHEILA YEE – A wealthy opera patroness with a mansion in Kahala.

DAPHNE DEE BLISS – a predatory interior designer and antiques dealer from Houston working in Hawaii; Jake’s former live-in lover.

LAZLO KARPATY – Hungarian Music Director of NY’s Metropolitan Opera.

THE CAST OF VERDI’S “LA TRAVIATA”

BENJAMIN ZAMORA (“Beni”) – Kris van Kampen’s common-law rancher husband, step-father of Sean & Suzie Skinner & father of baby Bubba.

C. Environment Circle:

EMPLOYEES AND TENANTS of the Lincoln Center Arms Apartments in Manhattan.

WAITER at O’NEAL’S BALLOON RESTAURANT across from Lincoln Center.

MUSICAL REVELERS at Nigel Blasenfort’s New Year’s Eve Party on the East Side.

AIRPORT PERSONNEL & PASSENGERS AT JFK AIRPORT

EMPLOYEES OF OPERA ALOHA

PATRONS AT OPERA ALOHA’S FUNDRAISER

THE OPERA AUDIENCE, including President & Mrs. Reagan, former President & Mrs. Carter.

OPERA GROUPIES

PHIL SANTIAGO’S WIFE & twins

ANGELINA STRILLO – conductor Strillo’s young wife

RAFAELLO STRILLO – naughty 8-year-old son of Angelina and Umberto Strillo

SCOTTIE HOLLIK – 8-year-old son of Melanie Hollik

LILY WANG – Yu Lan Wang’s 8-year-old daughter

KRIS VAN KAMPEN’S THREE KIDS – Sean & Suzie Skinner & baby Bubba Zamora

DR. JEFFREY SKINNER – a Honolulu dermatologist & cosmetic surgeon; Kris’ ex.

Evelyn’s Assignment # 1: The Three Character Circles in Big Little Lies

By doing this assignment I learned that the conflicts & connections between intriguing characters in 3 circles is one of the most important elements that make a TV show bingeworthy.

A. Main Character Circle: (5 friends)

MADELINE MARTHA MACKENZIE – pro-active, twice married, career-thwarted, extroverted, highly strung, stay-at-home Mom of 2 daughters, who has sacrificed career for family, takes her volunteer work in a theater & mothering very seriously, likes to solve people’s problems & is supportive of her emotionally fragile friend Jane.

JANE CHAPMAN – a single Mom new to Monterey, a bookkeeper looking for a part-time job and a new life who is hiding something dark in her background while trying to do her best for her son Ziggy.

CELESTE WRIGHT – a gorgeous retired lawyer with twin boys (Max & Josh), trapped in an abusive marriage with husband Perry Wright but afraid/unwilling to admit how bad it is or leave.

RENATA KLEIN – a successful business woman married to Gordon Klein; protective of their daughter, Amabella. Feels her friends don’t like her and are jealous about her career success.

BONNIE CARLSON – a mixed-race Latina yoga teacher in a mixed marriage with Madeline’s ex, Nathan Carlson. Mother of biracial daughter, Skye Carlson.

B. Connected Circle: (the friends’ husbands & children)

ED MACKENZIE – computer/software CEO, 2^nd husband of Madeline and father of Chloe, who works from home and does half the parenting and household chores but feels he’s not #1 in his wifes eyes, and resents their lack of sex.

PERRY WRIGHT – Celeste’s controlling & abusive husband; father of Max & Josh;

GORDON KLEIN – a businessman married to Renata; father of Amabella.

NATHAN CARLSON – Madeline’s ex-husband, father of half-sisters Abigail & Skye

ABIGAIL CARLSON – 16-year-old daughter of Madeline and her ex-Nathan Carlson. A typical teen developing independence & expertly pushing ner mother’s buttons.

CHLOE MACKENZIE – adorable, cheeky daughter of Madeline & Ed Mackenzie; half-sister to Abigail Carlson.

ZIGGY (Ziegfield) – angelic looking little son of Jane & an unnamed father; Ziggy is accused of choking Amabella Klein.

MAX & JOSH WRIGHT – Celeste & Perry’s twins.

SKYE CARLSON – daughter of Bonnie & Nathan.

C. Environment Circle:

PRINCIPAL NIPPAL

TEACHERS & CHILDREN in the public elementary school

SCHOOL STREET GUARD

TOWNS PEOPLE & POLICE OFFICERS

JOSEPH – director of Madeline’s play

TOM – flirty waiter at a popular local deli-restaurant

• This reply was modified 2 years, 10 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: Making corrections

[Evelyn Petros]

Bingeworthy TV Series – Module 1, Lesson 2/Assignments 2 & 1

Assignment #2: The Three Character Circles in my Bingeworthy rom com Serial TV Show

“Opera Aloha” by E.A. Petros – my unfinished novel is the source material for my show.

In doing this assignment I learned that I am on the right track with creating three tiers of characters for my project, but there are too many, which costs mucho dinero, so I may have to delete some. (Note: I have been having much trouble finding the correct place in the forum to post my assignments and have not yet gotten help from the Zen desk. I hope I’m posting these 2 Assignments in the right place. Help!)

Plot line: an (not so) innocent on a mission in a strange world

An out-of-work opera singer reeling from money problems & romantic fiascos, is forced to fly to Hawaii to perform a role that nearly wrecked her career 3 years earlier.

A. Main Character Circle:

MIRA SANTIAGO – a quirky NYC Mexican-American opera singer from Baltimore wants the whole enchilada (career, marriage, kids) but is finding her goals elusive.

KRIS VAN KAMPEN – Mira’s childhood friend, now an artist and gallery owner living with her rancher 2nd husband and 3 kids in Hana, Maui; ex-wife of Dr. Jeffrey Skinner.

JAKE SUTHERLAND – a diamond-in-the-rough, opera-hating Vietnam Vet, cookbook writer, and foster father of a Vietnamese teen; Kris’ neighbor in Hana, the brother she never had.

WYNSTON IRVING TRAPNELL (“Wyn”) – the charismatic architect of Opera Aloha’s Samuel Yee Memorial Opera House in Honolulu.

NIGEL BLASENFORT – Mira’s agent, the British-born Founder and President of Blasenfort Artists Management, Inc. (BAMI) in NYC.

B. Connected Circle:

STANLEY FARBER (“Stan) – a troubled NY actor; Mira’s “boyfriend” of 3 months.

FELIPE SANTIAGO (“Phil”) – Mira’s twin brother, a Baltimore TV sportscaster.

TIZIANO MAGNAVACA (“Tizo”) – Nigel’s Italian lover and general factotum.

MRS. GREENBAUM – Mira’s sweet old widowed next-door-neighbor in NYC.

“LA NARIZ” (“The Nose”) – Mira’s nickname for the mysterious, secretive, nosy tenant living across the hall from her in NYC.

SAMMY SANCHEZ – the Night Concierge at the Lincoln Center Arms Apartments in NYC.

ELSA VON REVENTLOW – Mira’s chief soprano rival.

GARY FUCHIGAMI – the Receptionist at Honolulu’s Ala Wai Palace Hotel.

MELANIE HOLLIK – General Director of Opera Aloha; mother of Scottie.

RALEIGH RICHARDSON – Mira’s wunderkind African-American NYC coach & accompanist, hired by Opera Aloha to assist conductor Strillo & rehearse the orchestra & chorus.

HANS-DIETER GUTTERMUTH – avant garde East German stage director of “La Traviata.”

YU LAN Wang – the set and costume designer; a Shanghai refugee & Mom of Lily.

UMBERTO STRILLO – the aging Sicilian conductor of “La Traviata.”

SHEILA YEE – A wealthy opera patroness with a mansion in Kahala.

DAPHNE DEE BLISS – a predatory interior designer and antiques dealer from Houston working in Hawaii; Jake’s former live-in lover.

LAZLO KARPATY – Hungarian Music Director of NY’s Metropolitan Opera.

BENJAMIN ZAMORA (“Beni”) – Kris van Kampen’s common-law rancher husband, step-father of Sean & Suzie Skinner & father of baby Bubba Zamora.

THE CAST OF LA TRAVIATA – (to be named later)

C. Environment Circle:

EMPLOYEES AND TENANTS of the Lincoln Arms Apartments in Manhattan.

WAITER at O’NEAL’S BALLOON RESTAURANT at Lincoln Center.

MUSICAL REVELERS at Nigel Blasenfort’s New Year’s Eve Party on the East Side.

AIRPORT PERSONNEL AT JFK AIRPORT

EMPLOYEES OF OPERA ALOHA

PATRONS AT OPERA ALOHA’S FUNDRAISER

THE OPERA AUDIENCE, including President & Mrs. Reagan, former President & Mrs. Carter.

OPERA GROUPIES at the stage door entrance.

PHIL SANTIAGO’S WIFE & twins

ANGELINA STRILLO – conductor Strillo’s young wife

RAFAELLO STRILLO – naughty 8-year-old son of Angelina and Umberto Strillo

SCOTTIE HOLLIK – 10-year-old son of Melanie Hollik

LILY WANG – Wang Yu Lan’s 8-year-old daughter

KRIS VAN KAMPEN’S THREE KIDS – Sean & Suzie Skinner & baby Bubba Zamora

DR. JEFFREY SKINNER – a Honolulu dermatologist & cosmetic surgeon; Kris’ ex.

Assignment # 1: The Three Character Circles in Big Little Lies

By doing this assignment I learned that the conflict between intriguing characters in 3 circles is one of the most important elements that make a TV show bingeworthy.

A. Main Character Circle: (5 friends)

MADELINE MARTHA MACKENZIE – pro-active, twice married, career-thwarted, extroverted, driven, stay-at-home Mom of 2 daughters, who has sacrificed career for family, takes her volunteer theater work & mothering very seriously, likes to solve people’s problems & is supportive of her emotionally fragile friend Jane.

JANE CHAPMAN – a single Mom new to Monterey, a bookkeeper looking for a part-time job and a new life who is hiding something dark in her background while trying to do her best for her son Ziggy.

CELESTE WRIGHT – a gorgeous retired lawyer with twin boys (Max & Josh), trapped in an abusive marriage with husband Perry Wright but afraid/unwilling to admit how bad it is, or leave.

RENATA KLEIN – a successful business woman married to Gordon Klein; protective of their daughter, Amabella. Feels her friends don’t like her, are jealous of her career success.

BONNIE CARLSON – a mixed-race Latina yoga teacher in a mixed marriage with Madeline’s ex, Nathan Carlson. Mother of biracial daughter, Skye Carlson.

B. Connected Circle: (the friends’ husbands & children)

ED MACKENZIE – computer/software CEO, 2nd husband of Madeline and father of Chloe, who works from home and does half the parenting and household chores but feels he’s not #1 in his wife’s eyes, and resents their lack of sex. (uh-oh, I know where that is going!)

PERRY WRIGHT – Celeste’s handsy, controlling & abusive international businessman husband; father of Max & Josh;

GORDON KLEIN – a businessman married to Renata; father of Amabella.

NATHAN CARLSON – Madeline’s ex-husband, father of half-sisters Abigail & Skye.

ABIGAIL CARLSON – 16-year-old daughter of Madeline and her ex-Nathan Carlson. A typical teen developing independence while expertly pushing her mother’s buttons.

CHLOE MACKENZIE – adorable, cheeky daughter of Madeline & Ed Mackenzie; half-sister to Abigail Carlson.

ZIGGY (Ziegfield) – angelic looking little son of Jane & an unnamed father, accused of choking Amabella Klein.

MAX & JOSH WRIGHT – Celeste & Perry’s twins.

SKYE CARLSON – daughter of Bonnie & Nathan.

C. Environment Circle:

PRINCIPAL NIPPAL

TEACHERS & CHILDREN in the public elementary school

SCHOOL STREET GUARD

TOWNS PEOPLE & POLICE OFFICERS

JOSEPH – director of Madeline’s play

TOM – flirty waiter at a popular local deli-restaurant

• This reply was modified 2 years, 10 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: The spell check on my computer is not working, so I had to correct some typos and fix some formatting

[Evelyn Petros]

I forgot to tell you that I am a retired international opera singer.

[Evelyn Petros]

Yikes! Because of my late start, I am a whole month behind the others, but will do my best to catch up! First, though I was planning to turn my completed period feature film drama (based on a 19th century short story by Kate Chopin in the public domain) into a binge worthy serial, I’ve decided instead to set that aside for now, and instead use my original, unfinished romantic comedy novel “Opera Aloha” (which has been languishing in my computer in various stages of catastrophe) as source material for this binge worthy class (God help me!).

This will allow me to 1) fulfill my goal of writing a binge worthy serial pilot; 2) force me to complete my unfinished novel, and 3) provide me with 2 finished projects instead of 1 to take with me to the May 2023 Rocaberti Screenwriters Retreat in France, for which I registered and paid in 2020, but which was postponed for 2 years because of the Covid pandemic. I will now concentrate on doing the ScreenwritingU assignment for Model 1, Lesson 1 and will post the results here when I have completed it. Thank you for your patience!

[Evelyn Petros]

I’m Evelyn Petros and I’m finally ready to start this class after dealing with travel, prior commitments, and Covid! I’ve written one feature screenplay which I hope to learn how to turn into a binge worthy limited series. I’m a retired opera singer addicted to period films, especially those of Merchant Ivory. I’ve written an opera libretto, and am currently working on three novels and a play. While living in Vienna, Austria (1991-2008), I was also a contributing journalist/photographer for the Community and Arts sections of Austria Today, an English language weekly.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: I initially forgot to mention my other writing experience

[Evelyn Petros]

From this assignment I learned how to start analyzing the first episode of a bingeworthy TV series (using Hal’s 5-Star Points) to find out what makes it bingeworthy.

I was not familiar with any of the shows on our list, but had read the novel “Handmaid’s Tale”, so I started watching the first episode of that series, but stopped after a few scenes because the film makers had done such a good job with the traumatic, graphic visuals, that I had to escape!

I then searched the list for a comedy, because I am writing one and was curious to see how other writers had done it. Not finding any, I focused on a series whose cast features actors whose work I know and admire. After watching the first episode of BIG LITTLE LIES, starring Nicole Kidman and Reese Witherspoon, I was hooked. After watching it through once, I looked at the Scene Breakdowns and noted there were 18 scenes in this 1st episode, then watched the episode again. The gorgeous scenery of Monterey at the beginning nailing down the location hooked me, and theimage of a gun that appears during the opening credits foreshadowed the genre of the show, a crime drama in a domestic setting.

BIG LITTLE LIES – 5-Star Points

1) Big Picture Hook – in the wealthy community of Monterey, CA, the parents of children attending an elementary school are suspects in a murder that occurs at the school’s fundraising event, a fancy costume ball.

2) Amazing and intriguing Characters – 5 families of mothers, fathers, and children in intruiging relationships with each other.

Family #1 – The Mackenzies

Madeline Martha Mackenzie – a twice married, career-thwarted, extroverted stay-at-home Mom of two who volunteers at a community theater. Her 2 kids – adorable, cheeky Chloe Mackenzie, a first grader & Abigail Carlson, a typical, rebellious teen who thinks she knows who she is, and exercises her “independence” by pushing her mother’s buttons.

Ed Mackenzie – Madeline’s 2nd husband, a seemingly loving, laid-back, computer/software engineer & CEO of a startup company. So far, he seems a nice guy.

Family #2 – The Chapmans

Jane Chapman – new in town; a single Mom who feels she doesn’t fit in, and may be hiding some trauma in her past; part-time bookkeeper & mother to Ziggy, an angelic looking little boy (whose father is not named) accused of choking a little girl in his class, though he denies it.

Family #3 – The Wrights

Celeste Wright – a gorgeous (stay-at-home?) mother of twin boys; wife of Perry Wright, a handsy, somewhat overbearing corporate type who likes playing rough with their kids. A Big Red Flag in Scene 15! Yikes! Is Perry an abuser?

Family #4 – The Kleins

Renata Klein – a successful business woman, mother of Amabella Klein, the first-grader who was choked at school. Gordon Klein, a business man.

Family #5 – The Carlsons

Bonnie Carlson – a yoga teacher, artsy, New Age, bohemian, in a mixed marriage with Madeline’s ex, Nathan Carlson; mother of mixed-race daughter, Skye Carlson.

3) Empathy/distress:

The show’s writers and directors used techniques that made me empathize with multiple characters:

a) With down-to-earth, level-headed, kind, friendly Madeline for having to deal with her rebellious teen daughterAbigail & for sacrificing career goals to raise her family.

b) With Jane, a stranger in town & part-time bookkeeper suffering from low self-esteem or past trauma while trying to do her best for her son, Ziggy.

c) With little Amabella, who was choked by a classmate on the first day of school.

d) With Ziggy, who may have been wrongly accused of choking her.

e) With Renata who overreacts to protect her daughter Amabella from the kid who hurt her, and who believes her friends resent her for her successful career.

g) With Celeste for having her bodily boundaries broached aggressively twice in this first episode (once playfully & once violently) by her husband Perry. (The guy gives me the creeps!)

h) With Bonnie Carlson, a seemingly nice person who is disliked by Madeline because she married Nathan Carlson, Madeline’s ex and had a daughter, Skye Carlson with him, and because she signed a petition blasting as inappropriate the play Madeline is producing

So far, several of the female characters seem to be in various stages of distress for various reasons, but the men, not so much. Hmmmmm, interesting.

4) Layers/Open Loops: Who is the murder victim at the costume ball? Who is the murderer? Why did the killer/s killthe victim? Is Ziggy lying when he denied choking Renata’s little girl Ammabella? If Ziggy’s telling the truth, then who did the choking? Who is Ziggy’s father? A big red flag for me was Perry Wright’s violent reaction to his wife Celeste when he forbidsher to allow their 2 boys to befriend Ziggy and she calls him on it. Is he a domestic abuser? Is Ziggy’s Mom, Jane Chapman, as nice and as fragile as she seems? What is in her background that would make her need to hide a gun under her pillow? What and whom is she afraid of?

5) Inviting Obsession: In this first episode, lots of unanswered questions in my head about the characters kept me hooked and desperate to learn more about the dynamics and conflicts within the families, their interpersonal relationships with their children and their friends! Lots seems to be going on under the surface. For example, are the snarky comments against Madeline by people interviewed about the murder a red herring, or do the filmakers do this deliberately to make the viewers think that Madeline is capable of murder? What’s the conflict between Jane and her mother all about? It was hard to hear what they were arguing about. Does Perry have an anger problem that makes him lash out habitually at Celeste to control her?

• This reply was modified 2 years, 10 months ago by  Evelyn Petros. Reason: To correct typos and after thinking on this episode further

[Evelyn Petros]

Evelyn Petros

I agree to the terms of this release form.

GROUP RELEASE FORM

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

[Evelyn Petros]

Mastering Subtext – Lesson 5 Assignment – Action Subtext

by Evelyn A Petros

1) Action Hides Something Covert:

Armand, frustrated that his meetings with Désirée are always chaperoned, slyly devises a way to get around the custom. On an after-dinner visit to Désirée’s home for drinks and dessert, he brings a gift of his cook’s famed peach compote, signals to Désirée not to touch it, but encourages Natalie, the enslaved chaperone, to eat, and even dishes out a second generous helping, which Natalie gobbles up, promptly falling unconscious. “Armand, what have you done,” Désirée asks. Armand laughingly confesses to previously spiking the compote with a sleeping powder and a generous splash of brandy,” so the chaperone will be out of their way.

2) Action Opposite Dialogue:

Madame Thibodeaux’ and her daughter Évélia visit Désirée, ostensibly with gifts for Désirée’s new baby, but Madame is really there to see if the rumors about the baby are true. Madame disregards Désirée’s warning that she doesn’t want her sleeping infant disturbed, forces her way to the cradle, pushes aside the mosquito netting, and peers inside. “It’s true then,” she whispers, to Évélia. “What is true,” Désirée, overhearing, asks. “That the child, the child—the child has your little rosebud mouth,” Madame lies, and concocts a false reason why she must bring their visit to a rapid close (she claims that they only stopped by on their way to New Orleans to have Évélia measured for a wedding trousseau, and if they don’t leave this instant they’ll miss the ferry). Despite Évélia’s futile protest that the fitting is tomorrow, Madame drags Évélia, off with her. In their carriage, Madame indulges in disparaging words about Désirée. Évélia tries to shut her up, with no success, and instead of instructing the driver to take them to the ferry, Madame tells the driver “Home, Carlos!” “Home?????!!!!” Évélia exclaims, mortified by her mother’s bigotry and behavior.

3) What I learned: This whole lesson on Mastering Subtext was great fun. I think I now have a more solid idea of how to insert subtext in my scenes. There are a few more scenes in my script where I may now want to add Subtext. I loved this class. Hal is a great screenwriting teacher! However, I am very frustrated with the difficulties I experience when trying to post my assignments. I follow Dimitri’s instructions exactly, but it doesn’t always work!

[Evelyn Petros]

Mastering Subtext – Lesson 5 Assignment – Action Subtext

by Evelyn A Petros

1) Action Hides Something Covert:

Armand, frustrated that his meetings with Désirée are always chaperoned, slyly devises a way to get around the custom. On an after-dinner visit to Désirée’s home for drinks and dessert, he brings a gift of his cook’s famed peach compote, signals to Désirée not to touch it, but encourages Natalie, the enslaved chaperone, to eat, and even dishes out a second generous helping, which Natalie gobbles up, promptly falling unconscious. “Armand, what have you done,” Désirée asks. Armand laughingly confesses to previously spiking the compote with a sleeping powder and a generous splash of brandy,” so the chaperone will be out of their way.

2) Action Opposite Dialogue:

Madame Thibodeaux’ and her daughter Évélia visit Désirée, ostensibly with gifts for Désirée’s new baby, but Madame is really there to see if the rumors about the baby are true. Madame disregards Désirée’s warning that she doesn’t want her sleeping infant disturbed, forces her way to the cradle, pushes aside the mosquito netting, and peers inside. “It’s true then,” she whispers, to Évélia. “What is true,” Désirée, overhearing, asks. “That the child, the child—the child has your little rosebud mouth,” Madame lies, and concocts a false reason why she must bring their visit to a rapid close (she claims that they only stopped by on their way to New Orleans to have Évélia measured for a wedding trousseau, and if they don’t leave this instant they’ll miss the ferry). Despite Évélia’s futile protest that the fitting is tomorrow, Madame drags Évélia, off with her. In their carriage, Madame indulges in disparaging words about Désirée. Évélia tries to shut her up, with no success, and instead of instructing the driver to take them to the ferry, Madame tells the driver “Home, Carlos!” “Home?????!!!!” Évélia exclaims, mortified by her mother’s bigotry and behavior.

3) What I learned: This whole lesson on Mastering Subtext was great fun. I think I now have a more solid idea of how to insert subtext in my scenes. There are a few more scenes in my script where I may now want to add Subtext. I loved this class. Hal is a great screenwriting teacher! However, I am very frustrated by the difficulties I experience when trying to post my assignments. I do exactly what Dimitri suggests, but it doesn’t always work!

[Evelyn Petros]

ScreenwritingU: Mastering Subtext – Lesson 4 Assignment

By Evelyn A Petros

Misinterpretation: Surface -The ferryman Coton Maïs thinks that Martha and Jasper, the white “couple” traveling with the toddler Lizzie (later rechristened Désirée) are her biological parents. Beneath the surface– Jasper is not the child’s father, but Martha’s brother, who is spiriting Martha away from New Orleans because she’s killed her abusive husband.

Sabotage: Zandrine, a house slave jealous of Armand’s wife, Désirée, is having an affair with Armand, and sabotages Désirée by alerting Armand to Désirée’s flouting of the Slave Laws, which causes him to confront Désirée and mistreat her. Désirée sabotages her husband’s upholding of the Slave Laws, by teaching her teenaged houseboy to read and write, and by plotting to free the boy through the Underground Railroad.

Superior Position: Viewers will know that Armand’s mother, Claire, who passed for white during her life and before her death in Paris, was of African heritage. They also know that Armand’s father, Louis, promised Claire to hide this from Armand to “protect” him in Louisiana. The irony of Armand’s cruel treatment of his slaves is that he’s a slaveowner who doesn’t know he has African blood. The revelation at the end of the script causes him to radically change. Viewers will know that Jasper is not Désirée’s biological father, but none of the other characters in the script do (except her biological mother, of course) since Désirée is a foundling who by accident gets separated from her mother. Désirée has no memory of her biological father, as she was a toddler when her mother murdered her father and fled, but at age ten she does try to run away to find her biological parents, but is stopped by Armand.

Deception: Lots of lies, deception and secrets going on throughout my script with multiple characters, both main and secondary. In Act One Michel lies to his childless wife Emilie, saying that they can foster the toddler Lizzie and rename her Désirée, because she is a foundling whose parents never came back to look for her, but in fact, her biological mother and uncle did. Louis also hides from Armand that Zandrine is his daughter by his housekeeper Suleika. Armand hides his affair with Zandrine from his father, Louis, and from his wife. Armand does not know he is committing incest with Zandrine until his overseer tells him during an argument very late in the film, horrifying Armand. Armand hides his gambling debts and adultery from Désirée until Act Three. Madame Thibodeaux, Désirée’s neighbor, pays her a visit with gifts for Désirée’s baby, but she’s really there to see if the rumors about the baby are true.

Unaware: Armand and Désirée are both unaware that they have African ancestors in their bloodline, but their reactions to their child being born black are like night and day. Désirée accepts and loves the child, but Armand does not and blames Désirée. Désirée is unaware of her husband’s philandering until he throws it in her face during an argument in Act Three. She is also unaware of Armand’s gambling, and the dire financial straits of the plantation, which he deliberately hides from her. Armand sends Désirée the letter his dying mother, Claire, wrote to his father, Louis, revealing her African heritage.

Can’t Say: Suleika can’t tell Armand the reason he should stop sleeping with her daughter Zandrine, because Louis, Zandrine’s father (and Armand’s as well), has forbidden Suleika from revealing to Armand or anyone else that Zandrine is his daughter.

What I learned: By pure luck, or instinct (?)–I am a retired opera singer familiar with convoluted opera plots, after all–I have been using subtext situations throughout my script, but I hope I haven’t overdone it and made the script too melodramatic.

[Evelyn Petros]

ScreenwritingU – Lesson #3 – Character Subtext – © Evelyn Petros (4/16/21)

Désirée

Character Surface: Self-identity issues and fear of abandonment caused by the early loss of Désirée’s birth parents, and the false belief, instilled by her foster father, Michel, that Désirée’s birth parents never came back to look for her when she was found wandering on the road without them, result in Désirée acting out the role of the sweet, dutiful and compliant woman that antebellum Louisiana French Creole plantation society demands of her. Fearful that she will face a loss of love and rejection by her foster parents and husband, Armand, if she reveals her true feelings, her hatred of slavery, and her ambition for a musical career, she keeps up this facade until the last straw.

Character Subtext: Underneath, Désirée longs for a musical career, becoming proficient on the pianoforte, and reveals her hatred of slavery by secretly teaching her husband’s teenaged slave boy, Négrillon, to read and write, while making arrangements for him to escape. Finally, after an unforgiveable act against the boy by Armand, she finds the courage to defy her sadistic husband and flee with her child, realizing she is much better off raising her biracial son without him, and exercising her wish for a career by teaching piano lessons and managing her aging foster parents’ plantation.

Armand

Character Surface: Armand, the brash young heir of L’Abri plantation is a charming Byronesque figure, who values his lineage and high status in the French Creole plantation society of antebellum Louisiana. He knows his father is keeping some secret from him, but doesn’t know what it is. Gradually, he suspects the truth, but won’t accept it, and blames his wife when their baby is born black. Committing a violent act makes him lose everything he holds dear, but causes him remorse and changes him for the better, though it can’t save his marriage.

Character Subtext: Armand’s losses as a child–his mother’s death, the loss of the family’s château and vineyard, and his father’s uprooting him from his idyllic Paris childhood to a neglected Louisiana plantation, wound and cause him to become a demanding bully, always needing to be in control of the people and situations in his life. He hides gambling debts and adultery from his wife, and does not know that he is committing incest with his mulatto half-sister until his overseer informs him.

Louis

Character Surface: This kind, loving widower and overindulgent father tries to do the best for his son, Armand, after the death of the boy’s mother in Paris. After their move to his Louisiana plantation, unlike his demanding son, he treats their slaves with civility and compassion.

Character Subtext: Louis hides several important secrets from his son, Armand, including the boy’s mother’s African heritage, and his fathering of a daughter with his housekeeper, thinking that this will protect the boy from harsh realities, but when the truth is revealed, the destruction of Armand’s marriage ensues, which ultimately also leads to Louis’ own death.

What I learned from this lesson: Even secondary and minor characters can have subtexts which will make their scenes more interesting! I gave one of my secondary characters, a busybody neighbor, subtexts that add much needed comic relief to my dramatic story.

[Evelyn Petros]

Lesson 2: Subtext through Environment – Evelyn Petros

There are four main environments evoking subtext in my screenplay:

Environment 1: A charming château in Paris, France, the home of the expat French Creole Louisiana planter Louis Aubigny, his wife and their son Armand. It evokes the idyllic paradise of Armand’s early childhood before the loss of his mother and his uprooting to his father’s run-down Louisiana plantation. The Paris château has masculine, French Empire furniture (Louis, in my imagination, was an admirer of Napoleon), rich, colorful silk upholsteries, a spacious garden.

Environment 2: At L’Abri, Louis’ neglected Louisiana plantation, a dark, oak-lined allée draped in Spanish Moss leads to his two-storey French Creole house with peeling paint and a black roof that covers its verandas like a black cowl. House and grounds exude gloom and disrepair since the Aubignys have been living in France for 10 years. The heavy, dark, almost sinister ambience of the property, including the heavy interior decor foreshadows tragedies that will soon occur there.

Environment 3: As a contrast, Valmondé Plantation and its well-kept white mansion with classical Greek pillars, are neatly landscaped and welcoming. Désirée is raised there by her foster parents Michel and Emilie Valmondé. Two white piggeonaires flank the mansion on either side, housing Désirée’s beloved pigeons. Inside, the light furniture and cheerful pastel décor reflects the Valmondés more engaging, empathetic personalities.

Environment 4: The small, rough slave cabins at L’Abri heighten the contrast between the wealthy European lifestyle of the French Creole slave owners and their exploited slaves. The atmosphere of injustice and cruelty is most apparent here.

What I learned: This exercise was fun for me. My education in art, interior design and music helped in my effort to evoke subtexts through the environments in my script.

[Evelyn Petros]

Because the website screwed up and erased my account, I was not able to post my assignment for Lesson 1 until now.

Lesson 1: Mastering Subtext – Evelyn Petros

Genre: Romance/drama loosely based on a short story in the public domain which I wrote as a feature film but now am turning into a limited series.

Surface: In antebellum Louisiana, family lies and secrets upend the lives of two French Creole plantation families and their slaves, ruining a marriage and causing profound changes to all.

Deeper meaning: The evils of racism, bigotry, lies, secrets, incest, misogyny, father/son rivalries, economic catastrophe, and the role of women in French Creole society, illustrated in plot situations, dialogues and actions of the two main characters, their parents and their closest friends.

Plot Subtext: Two children of vastly different character and temperament grow up on neighboring plantations, bond over music, and fall in love and marry, but their polar opposite attitudes toward slavery cause them and their slaves misery and conflict.

Scene: Armand’s father promises his dying wife not to reveal the secret of her African blood to their young son Armand, who, because of certain experiences, grows up with negative attitudes toward his father’s slaves.

Scene: Désirée, a foundling with no knowledge of her birth parents, is raised and pampered by wealthy foster parents, and grows to despise the institution of slavery, seeking to subvert the slave laws by teaching her teenaged houseboy, whom she wants to free, to read and write.

Major twist: Armand throws his wife out of the house when she gives birth to a black baby, accusing her of adultery with the houseboy, not knowing that the African bloodline is his.

A major twist: His bigotry causes Armand to lose everything and everyone that he holds dear. When his father finally reveals the truth to him, Armand, remorseful, decides to make amends, but it’s too late for reconciliation.

A major twist: Overcoming her husband’s injustices and rejection, Désirée claims her rights as a French Creole woman to petition for an annulment, raise her child alone, and take over the management of her elderly foster parents’ plantation.

What I learned: I am somewhat on the right track using subtext in my script, but could find more ways in more scenes to add some more. I also learned that I need to take a class in how to write a limited TV series, and how to pitch it, since since this is my first attempt.