[Gregory Kauffman]

Lesson 2

Gregory Kauffman – Marketable Components

1. Tell us your current logline.
Born illegitimate and in scandal, Manuela Sáenz fights her way into acceptance during the South American revolution, becoming the most powerful woman on the continent while winning the love of the greatest warrior in the world.

2. Look through the 10 Components of Marketability and pick one or two that have the most potential for selling this script.
• B. Great Title (The Liberatress)
• C. True. (Based on a true story.)
• D. Timely — connected to some major trend or event.
• F. Ultimate. (…most powerful woman on the continent while winning the love of the greatest warrior in the world.)
• J. A great role for a bankable actor. (Both Manuela Sáenz and Simón Bolívar are great roles)

3. Do a quick brainstorm session about ways to elevate those two components for this script and tell us how you might pitch the script through the two components.

Check my current pitch to see what can be beefed up.

4. What I learned doing this assignment is…?(…to carefully find ways to emphasize marketability.)

[Gregory Kauffman]

Lesson 1
Gregory Kauffman – Projects and Market
1. Genre, Title, and Concept.
TWO SCRIPTS
Western, THE SHAMAN’S QUEST, A naive young blacksmith from St. Louis discovers he was adopted and follows a Caddo Indian shaman to a Texas town to uncover the truth about his family, getting entangled in a dangerous battle over crude oil that threatens him and the woman he loves, forcing him to face the realities of life and what it truly takes to hold onto happiness.
History/Drama/Romance—TV Pilot—1 Hour, THE LIBERATRESS, Born illegitimate and in scandal, Manuela Sáenz fights her way into acceptance during the South American revolution, becoming the most powerful woman on the continent while winning the love of the greatest warrior in the world. Based on a true story.
2. In one or two sentences, tell us what you think is most attractive about your story.
THE SHAMAN’S QUEST – Complex characters making this something one is familiar with but different.
THE LIBERATRESS – The best woman’s story from Latin America.
3. Tell us which you will target FIRST — managers, producers, or actor’s production company — and why you picked that target.
Producers
4. Answer the question “What I learned today is…?”
*… being specific about what you want.*

[Gregory Kauffman]

Gregory Kauffman
I agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.

[Gregory Kauffman]

1. Gregory Kauffman
2. 12 scripts you’ve written
3. A sale.
4. I’ve lived on the Galapagos Islands

[Gregory Kauffman]

Greg’s Thriller Writing Sample Plan

What I learned doing this assignment is clarity about the rules for the genre.

——————————————————————————–

This is the opening to On The Edge, which is a Thriller script.

ON THE EDGE

Written by

Gregory Kauffman

EXT. RUNNING PATH – MORNING

RUNNING SHOES HIT GRAVEL. RAE (mid 30s) runs with an

expression that betrays an inner anger.

A COUPLE hears her footsteps and barely separate in time for

Rae to pass without noticing them. As she barrels forward,

other runners sidestep to keep out of her way.

At a water fountain, she catches her breath quickly, pulls

out her phone, and speed dials.

RAE

It’s Rae Turner calling for Julia

Goodman.

(beat)

OK, I’ll try her cell.

INT. AGENCY HALLWAY/AGENCY OFFICE – MORNING

HEELS CLICK ON COMPOSITION FLOORING. JULIA (mid 40s), coffee

in hand, takes decisive strides down a long hallway.

She enters a door that displays a sign reading, “JULIA

GOODMAN Counter-Terrorism.” She sits and casually logs into

her computer.

HER CELL PHONE RINGS, and she answers helpfully.

JULIA

Hi Rae. No, I’m sorry honey we

haven’t heard anything yet. Rae,

all I can tell you is we think Ken

is still alive and expect to find

him soon. Yes, I’ll let you know. I

know. Don’t worry. Yes, I’ll call.

INT. MAKESHIFT PRISON CELL – DAY

FEET SHACKLED and hands cuffed, KEN (mid 30s) sits on the

floor of a small room, leaning against the chipping paint of

a concrete wall. Close by are palettes stacked with a few

bags of cement. He looks tough and competent, though thin.

A CALL TO PRAYER drifts through a broken window, along with

the sound of LIGHT TRAFFIC.

Three masked, MIDDLE EASTERN MEN enter. The first violently

threatens Ken in Arabic, holding an automatic rifle. Two

others roughly stand him up, put a hood over his head, and

unshackle his feet before shoving him out of the door.

EXT. ALLEY – DAY

Ken lands in the dust between a Humvee and a wall. The

Humvee’s engine is still running. Ken’s hands are still

cuffed behind him.

No one else is around. The three men issue a confusion of

orders while they stand him up, shove his face against the

wall and uncuff him.

Ken raises his arms as the tirade from the three men

continues. Ken puts his head against the wall in

resignation… will they shoot him now?

CAR DOORS SLAM and the Humvee DRIVES AWAY. He slowly reaches

up and takes off his hood and turns around.

INT. AGENCY OFFICE – DAY

JULIA’S CELL PHONE RINGS. She answers and listens without

speaking. A VOICE ON THE PHONE ANNOUNCES SOMETHING and then

hangs up.

Thoughtful, she sets the phone down on her desk.

Sitting in thought for a second, she finally smiles and dials

her phone. It rings and she gets a VOICE MAIL ANNOUNCEMENT.

JULIA

(excited)

Hello, Rae? Sorry I missed you but

I have great news! Ken’s been

found! He’s safe and he’ll be home

in a few days. Call me and I’ll

fill you in. I’m so happy for you.

She hangs up.

EXT. STRIP MALL – DAY

The mall sits in the bright, warm sunlight of a Northeastern

US city. Rae paces impatiently near the door of a martial

arts dojo, holding her phone to her ear. Finally, frustrated

at the lack of answer, she hangs up and rushes into the dojo.

INT. MARTIAL ARTS DOJO – DAY

Rae goes to HANNA (a couple of years younger than Rae) and

throws her phone down on her gym bag. Hanna gives Rae some

sparring gloves, into which Rae quickly forces her hands.

HANNA

Anything?

RAE

No. Damnit. I’ll call again when

class is over.

HANNA

Relax, Rae. There’s still plenty of

time. Julia’s always come through

for you.

RAE

You’re right, Hanna, bless her, but

all I have is her voice mail. No

details. This not-knowing is

fucking wearing me out.

HANNA

I know, honey. But relax. Ken is

fine. I’m sure of it.

Hanna throws a look at the SENSEI.

HANNA (CONT’D)

Come on. Let’s get ready. You know

how he is.

RAE

Right.

Rae takes a few deep breaths to calm herself, and then steps

into the line of waiting students. The Sensei walks to the

center of the floor.

SENSEI

OK. Make sure you have a partner

you haven’t worked with before. Mix

it up.

The students shift positions into pairs.

SENSEI (CONT’D)

Good. Now drill till you’ve got it.

No hard contact.

Rae’s SPARRING PARTNER is a muscular man in his mid thirties

with a buzz cut. His attention stays on the Sensei.

SENSEI (CONT’D)

OK. Let’s go.

When Rae and her partner face each other, he gives her AN

INTIMIDATING SNEER.

RAE ZEROS IN ON THE SNEER and attacks instantly, without any

sense of protocol. The onslaught is so quick and unexpected

that she catches him off guard. Her technique is excellent

and she is full of rage. He is soon down, succumbing to her

angry attack.

The Sensei hurries over and pulls Rae off of him.

SENSEI (CONT’D)

Rae. Rae! That’s it!

The fury that flushes her face is quickly replaced with,

“what have I done?”

SENSEI (CONT’D)

Rae. Go sit down.

RAE

Shit.

She crosses to her gym bag and takes off her gloves.

Hanna comes over to her to see what’s happened.

The sensei bends down and helps her partner up. The commotion

has stopped the other students’ sparring.

SENSEI

Everyone else, just continue.

(to the Sparring Partner)

You OK?

SPARRING PARTNER

Fine. No thanks to that bitch.

SENSEI

OK. OK.

The Sparring Partner takes off his gloves and wipes his nose,

which is bleeding.

SPARRING PARTNER

Damnit.

Rae crosses over to him.

RAE

I’m sorry. I am. If there’s anyth–

SPARRING PARTNER

Yeah. Fine.

The Sensei pulls Rae aside.

SENSEI

Come here.

RAE

I’m sorry.

SENSEI

Rae, that’s twice now. What are you

thinking? That guy’s a lawyer. He

could sue us both.

RAE

I’m sorry. I really am.

SENSEI

Rae, I like you. You’re a good

student and you’re really good at

this sport, but you have to get

control of yourself.

RAE

I know. I know. Damnit.

SENSEI

I’m sorry, but don’t come back

until something’s changed for you.

RAE

I promise you, Sensei, it will not

happen again.

SENSEI

I’ll need more than promises. For

now, please leave.

The Sensei watches her and shakes his head before returning

to the class.

Rae angrily goes over and picks up her bag.

RAE

(to Hanna)

Let’s go.

She exits. Hanna hurries to catch up.

EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY

Hanna tries to keep up with Rae’s angry pace as she strides

toward Hanna’s car.

HANNA

Rae. Rae!

Rae stops.

RAE

Damnit. Damnit.

(beat)

I promise you, that will never

happen again.

HANNA

I believe you. What did Sensei say?

RAE

I apologized but he kicked me out.

Fuck. I might have really hurt that

guy. Damnit.

She takes a deep breath, attempting to calm down.

HANNA

Never mind. We’ll talk to him later

and take care of it.

(gently)

Rae–

Rae knows what Hannah is about to say and rolls her eyes. She

starts to walk away.

HANNA (CONT’D)

Come on, Rae, why don’t you get

some help?

RAE

And end up like Mom? Drooling in a

drug induced apathy in some cold

institution? No, thank you.

HANNA

No, of course not. You’re not Mom,

and I’m not saying you need to be

in an insti–

RAE

I’m fine. I keep busy and–

HANNA

Rae! When you worked for the

agency, you could have been a field

agent. I was so proud of my big

sister. Top of your class. I wanted

to be like you. But you already–

RAE

That’s over.

HANNA

You already learned martial arts in

your training. Other than keeping

yourself busy, why even take more

martial arts?

RAE

It’s a different kind. I’m learning

something I haven’t tried before.

HANNA

That’s not it. You drag me to rock

climbing, gun ranges, martial arts,

yoga… You do weight training,

take cooking classes, exercise…

Not counting the time you spend

looking for Ken.

RAE

So?

HANNA

So, you’re not giving yourself time

to think.

RAE

Bullshit. It’s all healthy activity

and I’m not going to be defined by

one incident that…

She makes a gesture of dismissing the conversation.

HANNA

What are you going to do with this

extra time now… now that Ken is

coming home?

Rae becomes more agitated.

HANNA (CONT’D)

Look, honey, I just want you to–

RAE

NO!

(intense)

I refuse to be a fucking victim! Do

you hear me?

HANNA

But Rae…

RAE

(almost shouting)

It doesn’t matter what I feel or

what’s happened to me. I’m going to

live a life that I want. Me. Not

defined by some event. I will get

control, and I am going do things

that I have chosen to do.

She stops to calm herself.

RAE (CONT’D)

I’ll be fine… once Ken gets home.

Rae turns and heads for the car. Hanna doesn’t move. Rae

turns back.

RAE (CONT’D)

What?

HANNA

Rae. Your always on edge…

brittle, almost ready to break.

Something traumatic happened to you

and you’re still suffering from it.

That is a fact. I want you to

accept just that much at least.

RAE

No! The only thing I’m suffering

from right now is embarrassment.

She angrily opens the passenger door, throws her bag in the

back, and gets in. Hannah opens the driver’s door.

INT. HANNA’S CAR – DAY

Hanna drives. Rae looks out the window in silence.

HANNA

Rae, you’ve got to do something to

start really healing.

RAE

I’m a lot better now than when…

She turns back to the window and watches trees and houses and

cars go by.

THE SCENE BECOMES WINTER.

INT. RAE’S CAR – VERY EARLY DAWN

SNOW COVERS TREES, CARS, AND HOUSES. Rae drives through the

snow as tears trickle down her cheeks–her neck and face

badly bruised. She wipes blood from under her nose before

pulling into a garage in an upscale neighborhood.

EXT. RAE’S BACKYARD – VERY EARLY DAWN

Rae comes out of the sliding door and looks at the pristine

snow covering the ground. She takes off her coat and drops it

on the deck.

A SERIES OF SHOTS

A. Hanna comes in Rae’s front door, CALLS OUT, and then runs

up the stairs.

B. Hanna is at the bathroom door. THE SOUND OF THE SHOWER

RUNNING. She knocks and CALLS OUT AGAIN. Hanna opens the

bathroom door, CALLS AGAIN, and walks to the shower obscured

by the mist inside. She opens the door.

C. Running water. No one. Hanna runs out of the bathroom.

EXT. RAE’S BACKYARD – VERY EARLY DAWN

Hanna comes outside and stops, shocked at what she sees.

Rae is curled up in the snow, naked and shivering, her

clothes on the deck. In addition to her facial bruises, her

arms and torso are also bruised.

Hanna grabs Rae’s coat and throws it over her.

HANNA

Rae, what are you doing out here?

Hanna helps her up and into the house.

INT. HANNA’S CAR – DAY

SUNSHINE REFLECTS OFF THE CARS AND WINDOWS as they drive on.

RAE

I am better.

HANNA

Sure, you’re better. Time goes by.

(beat)

You could still use some help.

A NOTIFICATION sounds on Rae’s phone. She looks at it.

RAE

It’s Ken! He’s going to Skype me in

an hour.

HANNA

Thank goodness.

Hanna increases her speed as Rae answers the message.

INT. RAE’S OFFICE – DAY

Rae in her office, off the main room in her house, using

computer equipment that is high end. Ken comes on screen.

Just as they SPEAK THEIR “HELLOS”, there is a very brief

SCRAMBLING OF THE VIDEO AND LOSS OF AUDIO.

KEN

Rae! What a sight for sore eyes.

RAE

Ken. Oh, my God. You look so thin.

KEN

I’m great since I’m talking to you.

Did they tell you what happened?

RAE

All I know it that one day Julia

called and said you’d been captured

and she didn’t know anything else.

I was frantic.

KEN

I was in the dark too. Held and

released. No apparent reason.

(beat)

I’ll explain more later, but I

think it had something to do with

Cyber Ops.

RAE

(beat)

What would Cyber Ops have to do

with it?

CU, FINGER POISED ABOVE THE ENTER KEY ON A KEYBOARD.

In the background are two monitors showing both Rae’s and

Ken’s transmissions, one on each.

KEN (V.O.)

(on screen, filtered)

I was monitoring someone and

overheard a conversation that…

The OPERATIVE’s finger presses the key. The VIDEO SCRAMBLES

AND THE AUDIO IS BRIEFLY BROKEN.

RAE (V.O.)

(on screen, filtered)

Are you there?

BACK TO SCENE

THE CALL RIGHTS ITSELF.

RAE (CONT’D)

Ken?

KEN

I’m here.

(beat)

That’s why I suspected Cyber Ops.

We need to do some investigation.

RAE

I didn’t get what you said. But I

no longer work in Cyber Ops. I quit

the agency.

KEN

What? Since when? Why?

She doesn’t want to answer.

KEN (CONT’D)

Rae?

RAE

(struggling)

I was assaulted, and…

KEN

Oh, no… By whom?

RAE
Jake Russo.

[Gregory Kauffman]

Greg’s Key Business Decisions

What I learned from this assignment is that I learned how to set a script into the business decisions and amp up the bankability of those decisions.

Give us the decisions that are in your current High Budget script:

Genre:
Thriller/Sci-Fi

Title:
RUR

Other possible titles:

*Rossum’s Universal Robots
*Robot Slaves
*Human Robots
*Robots Live
*Robots Alive
*Robot Salvation

Concept:
Carl Kapek’s play, R. U. R., (from which we acquired the English word,
robot) adapted to modern times and technologies:

Unable to accept any human touch after being traumatized as a child, a
woman becomes a robotics engineer and helps to save new, human-form robots
from destruction despite the efforts of powerful senator in the pockets of
a large corporation.

Audience:
Men and Women over 25

Budget:
$35MM

Lead Characters:
Helena – a young, brilliant, robotics engineer who has suffered a trauma that
has left her cut off from any human touch

Rossum – Sole owner of Rossum’s Universal Robots who is about to deploy a
new product – human-form robots despite opposition from the prejudiced and
a powerful Senator bent on Rossum’s destruction.

Journey / Character Arc:
Helena – Every child is important at this time because the population is
dropping sharply. Helena starts off
as a traumatized child abused by a person and saved by a robot. She grows up to become a robotics engineer
and starts working for the leader in robotics manufacturing. Dealing with human-form robots changes her
and allows her to experience human love while changing the fate of human-form
robots condemned to be destroyed by governmental decree.

Rossum – He has inherited his grandfather’s company and is determined to
fulfill the old man’s vision of robots being human-like in their
appearance and interactions with people.
He accomplishes this and dies trying to save his new robots from
destruction.

Opening / Ending:
Opening – Helena has been kidnapped and abused by a deranged man. She is saved by the ATTU (Anti-Terrorist
Tactical Unit) who are charged with using fatal force whenever a computer
or robot is used while committing a crime.
They endanger Helena’s life in doing so and she has to be
hospitalized and becomes fearful of humans.

Ending: – Through Helena’s efforts the new human-form robots become
endowed with life and become the ones rebuilding a planet where its human
population is dying off.

2. Tell us which of those decisions you could improve to make your script more marketable:

I changed the concept, giving it a better hook. I also increased the villain’s power and presence in the various decisions. I also offered alternate titles.

[Gregory Kauffman]

Greg’s Specialty — Thriller

What I learned doing this assignment is how good screenwriters use the conventions.

1. Tell us your specialty.
Thrillers

2. Do a quick Google search for “top (genre) movies.” Select two of the top movies in your genre to watch.
Done

3. As you watch each movie, take notes on how that movie fulfills the key parts of your genre.

4. For each movie, tell us the following:

#1

Genre: THRILLER

Title: HEAT

How it delivered on the genre conventions:

Mystery, Suspense, Intrigue it has them all. Danger always. Stakes are high, plot twists and suspense (however, does not fulfill “never letting up” (elements of drama and noir intrude)

Difficult to tell who the hero is. Most resourceful is McCauley. Hanna makes the longest journey and, in the end, I chose him as the hero, even though we were rooting for McCauley because of his competence.

Hanna is also the most dangerous and thus villain-like. (McCauley does not seem bloodthirsty.)

All the main necessary emotions are there.

Outline of the movie, highlighting the parts that fulfill the genre:

*McCauley walking through hospital, stealing(?) ambulance
*Shiherlis buys exposives
*Hanna making love/shower. Lauren introduced. !Suspense in her intense worry about father
*Something’s going down. Shots of vehicles doing something !Mystery
*Revealed armor care heist 11min
*Waingro wants to kill someone and murders one of the guards
*The fence talks about a Van Zant also there is a potential bank job
*The gang meets and McCauley is pissed at Waingro and is about to kill him, but he escapes
* Shiherlis’ wife is pissed about his choices and they have a near violent fight
*Hanna and wife are having strained talk. He is working too much for them and the problems they have
*McCauley meets Eady. Following scenes are them getting to know each other (drama, not thriller)
END ACT I

#2

Genre: THRILLER

Title: THE DARK KNIGHT

How it delivered on the genre conventions:

Mystery/Intrigue/Suspense in abundance

Batman is unknowing in that he is always behind on what to expect but, of course, always a resourceful hero. Dent is that too—but his arc twists back to evil and being the dangerous one. Batman’s arc is from crime fighter with enemies who would fight anything beneficial to hunted criminal who still loves his city and is still fighting for them.

Every scene is fraught with danger, both for Batman and Dent

The Joker is dangerous, devious, and unrelenting, committed to destruction.

All of the main emotions for thrillers are aroused. The stakes are high and the plot tiwists frequently

Outline of the movie, highlighting the parts that fulfill the genre:
*Opening sequence is full of surprises and shows how duplicitous and evil the villain is.
*Next sequence establishes Batman’s current world. He is an outlaw “vigilante” and the mayor is being pressured to bring him in and clean up crime in Gotham
*Next sequence shows Batman wannabes in action and Batman catching criminals and wannabes.
*Gordon looks over bank from first scene.
*Batman and Alfred talking, setting up Dent as a force for good in Gotham
*Courtroom scene. Dent makes heroic moves.
*Meetup Dent/Gordon
*Lau and Lucious meeting and no thriller emotions
*Restaurant Dent/Rachel/Wayne and Wayne decides to support Dent.
*Meeting Lau/Gangsters intercut with bust on banks. Lau has Gangster’s money. Joker walks in and takes over meeting. Batman is in danger. Suspense.
*Dent/Batman/Gordon Batman is going to bring Lau back.
*Plans made to get Lau. . Suspense.
*Plan begins. Suspense.
*Back in Gotham, Joker attacks and takes out one of the gangsters belligerent to him.
*Back to plan in China. Suspense.
*Lau is back and preparations are being made to indict all the gangsters. A joker card shows up on the judge’s desk. Intrigue. Suspense.
END ACT I

[Gregory Kauffman]

I improved my profile, focused it more, took out old non-entertainment business elements.

This will be an ongoing process of enhancements.

[Gregory Kauffman]

Subject line: Gregory’s Credibility is Going Up!

1. Assess what credibility you do have…and don’t have.

Credibility Checklist

<s>1. Your Writing Sample</s>

<s> – ‘Recommend’ from Coverage</s>

<s> – Delivers on the genre in a strong way</s>

<s> – Delivers on the business decisions</s>

2. Screenwriting Accomplishments

<s>– Contest wins</s>

– Smaller deals (options, sales, writing assignments)

One movie optioned

<s>– Larger deals</s>

<s>– Movies produced</s>

3. The Google factor

Google your name. How many items on the first page show you as professional screenwriter?

Buzz posts, interviews, news reports, etc..

One time: IMDB

4. Your Network

How many producers are in your network?

1400±

How many Connections do you have who are connected to producers?

1500±

5. Education specific to screenwriting

– Degree in film or screenwriting

– Master Screenwriter Certificate program at ScreenwritingU

<s>6. Borrowed Credibility</s>

<s>– Represented by an agent or manager</s>

<s>– Working with a producer</s>

<s>– Connected to a star</s>

<s>– Connected to a funding source</s>

7. IMDB CREDITS

Go to http://imdb.com/ and search your name. What credits show up there for you?

Gregory Kauffman (II) (Writer, Death Stage (in development))

8. Other forms of credibility that is related to screenwriting:

– Novels published

Manuela (2001 – ISBN: 0-9704250-0-7)

– Producer or director experience

Director of three short films and television commercials.

<s> – Experience working with agencies, production companies, film festivals, etc..</s>

2. Put together a plan to increase your credibility and take action.

Increase my profile on LinkedIn.

Get coverage for my Thriller

Keep working at it.

3. Select the most important piece of your current credibility as a way of introducing yourself.

Published novelist

Optioned Screenwriter

4. Select the parts you’ll use for your LinkedIn profile.

Same

5. Continue to take actions to build your credibility from now on.

[Gregory Kauffman]

1. Bring in your highest budget script. (If you only have one script, then that one is perfect for this.)

For the completed script, you’ll have assignments to work with things like budget, elevating it as a writing sample, and how you might respond to changes that are needed for the script.

***

RUR

Carl Kapek’s play, R. U. R., adapted to modern times and technologies: Unable to accept any human touch after being traumatized as a child, a woman becomes a robotics engineer and helps to save new, human-form robots from destruction.

***

2. Bring in a concept and two-page synopsis for a movie that you may or may not write in the future. Just put together a quick few pages that give us the acts of your story.

For the concept/synopsis, you’ll have assignments for considering different budget levels, creating a “Take” for producers, and making key decisions that work for a producer.

10-25MM

***

Killing Love

A serial killer kidnaps a woman to relive a lost love.

Protagonitst: Emily Benton 23 Student

Antagonist: Nathan Steel 29 Construction worker

An underground cell or room in a basement, poorly lit, as Emily (student, 23) is brought in, bound, gagged and blindfolded. She is made to sit in a chair and then a light goes on. Nathan (29) is revealed.

Emily is terrified, but Nathan is very gentle with her, telling her he is not going to hurt her… that, this time, he is going to do what she wants. Emily doesn’t understand. He gently unbinds her wrists, being as calm as he can be, so that she doesn’t attack immediately when she is unbound. He leaves the room slowly and locks the door behind him. She takes off her gag and blindfold and frantically looks around.

He returns later and tells her what he has in mind, which is to have her play the part of a love he lost as he tries to relive scenes from a past that he is trying to recapture. Emily tries to talk her way out of her situation. Their inability to communicate frustrates Nathan.

A couple of visits to her room later, after she has eaten and settled in, he enters wearing a suit. He pulls a dress out of the closet and tells her to go into the adjoining bathroom and put it on. He waits. Just as he is starting to become impatient, she reenters the room. He is very pleased at how pretty she looks.

He sets up a couple of chairs, facing the same direction and has her sit in one, and takes the other chair himself. He tells her that they are in a lecture hall at the university on the first day of classes. He tells her what he wants her to say and then he responds with statements from the past he is trying to relive.

She is not very cooperative, which gets him angry. He storms out of the room.

He is gone for a day and night. She is hungry and thirsty when he re-enters the room. He tries to convince her to play his game. They argue. He tells her she made him do it. It soon becomes clear that he has killed someone in his absence. He tells her that he will have to do that every time he fails to relive his past. He can’t help it.

They get to know each other, but she fails to satisfy on other occasions and he kills more people. Emily wants the killing to stop and, in exasperation, she asks, “Do you think you’re the only one it ever happened to?”

She tells of her own lost love. He can barely be polite as he listens to her and finally says he’s not there to listen to her. He leaves and stays away again. Emily knows this means someone else has died.

It is pretty clear to her that she needs to comply, to save lives, but when she really tries, she still disappoints him. It is not working out the way he wanted. He hits her.

Emily figures out a way to overpower him when he returns this time and does. She runs upstairs, with him in pursuit. They fight in the dining room of the old house where Nathan lives, destroying furniture. He knocks her out and carries her back to her room.

When she awakens, she laments that someone else is now going to die. We see him outside her room pacing and miserable, a gun in his hand.

When he enters the room this time, she is lying on the bad crying. He is so overwhelmed with the emotions this drags up that he lies down next to her, holding her gently. Soon, he starts telling her the things that she had told him that the love that she lost had said to her. She cries and they both come to a catharsis and fall asleep.

Finally, we see her carefully rise, so as not to wake him. She picks up the pistol that he left nearby. He is still sleeping as she points the gun at him. In her eyes we see love.

<1MM

***

[Gregory Kauffman]

1. Name?

Gregory Kauffman

2. How many scripts you’ve written?

Several, including a pilot I am marketing now.

3. What you hope to get out of the class?
Enough information on how to get writing assignments, and to get them.

4. Something unique, special, strange or unusual about you?

I traveled in South America when I was young and spent several months on the Galapagos Islands.

[Gregory Kauffman]

1. Gregory Kauffman

2. I agree to the terms of this release form.

3. GROUP RELEASE FORM

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

This completes the Group Release Form for the class.