[hari messer]

Hi,
My name is Hari Messer. I’ve written two scripts. I want to incorporate some action scenes into the script I’m working on and would like to learn all I can about the genre.

I’m impressed with the unique experiences of the people in the class.

Something unique about myself… George Harrison picked me up hitchhiking.

[hari messer]

1. Hari Messer
2. “I agree to the terms of this release form.”
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.

[hari messer]

1. Hari Messer
2. “I agree to the terms of this release form.”

• This reply was modified 3 weeks ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Fascinating Scene Outlines!

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

I learned that… each scene should be designed using interest techniques for its beginning, middle and end.

### Scene Breakdown with Interest Techniques

—

Scene 1
EXT. FOG-SHROUDED FOREST – NIGHT

Two combatants fight over a fresh water spring. One is human, the other a strange reptilian creature. The reptilian pierces the human through the heart and kills him. We cut to Jamaica jumping up in bed, awakened by the nightmare.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): The scene opens in a fog-shrouded forest at night, with eerie silence and shadows hinting at hidden dangers, creating a tense atmosphere.
**Middle:** (Mystery): A fierce battle ensues over the fresh water spring, revealing that the combatants are not both human, but one is a strange reptilian creature, deepening the enigma.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): The reptilian creature kills the human, and we abruptly cut to Jamaica waking up from this vivid nightmare, suggesting a deeper connection to the conflict.

—

Scene 2
INT. MC BRIDE'S CAR – DAY

Colt McBride, a suspended cop, is driving into Jefferson with his new K9 partner, Jake. McBride is not a fan of Jake.

**Beginning:** (Uncomfortable Moment): McBride drives into Jefferson with his new K9 partner, Jake, visibly annoyed and grumbling about having to work with a dog.
**Middle:** (Internal Dilemma): McBride's frustration builds as he wrestles with his resentment over his suspension and his reluctance to bond with Jake.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): McBride looks determined as he drives into Jefferson, hinting at his resolve to make a fresh start despite his initial reluctance.

—

Scene 3
EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY

Sheriff Del Beck stops McBride for a minor traffic violation. Their interaction reveals McBride’s suspension and Beck’s control over Jefferson.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Beck pulls McBride over for a minor traffic violation, creating an immediate tension.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): Their conversation reveals McBride’s suspension and hints at Beck’s authoritarian control over Jefferson.
**Ending:** (Power Dynamic Shift): The interaction ends with a tense standoff, establishing Beck as a significant antagonist and hinting at future confrontations.

—

Scene 4
EXT. JEFFERSON TOWN – DAY

McBride drives into Jefferson, noticing a strong police presence for such a small town.

**Beginning:** (More Interesting Setting): McBride drives into the quaint yet unnervingly quiet town of Jefferson, noting the heavy police presence.
**Middle:** (M. Intrigue): As he navigates through the town, he observes subtle but telling signs of an oppressive regime, such as nervous glances from residents and overly patrolling officers.
**Ending:** (N. Mystery): McBride's suspicion grows, setting the stage for him to delve deeper into Jefferson's unusual atmosphere and uncover its secrets.

—

Scene 5
EXT. JEFFERSON AIRFIELD – DAY

Daniel St. George, an alien investigator/charlatan, pilots his small plane into Jefferson for a speaking engagement.

**Beginning:** (Surprise): Daniel lands his small, rickety plane at the Jefferson airfield, immediately drawing attention from onlookers due to his eccentric entrance.
**Middle:** (Character Changes Radically): Daniel presents himself as a knowledgeable investigator, but subtle cues reveal his charlatan nature, leaving the audience questioning his true intentions.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): Daniel’s arrival and planned engagement generate curiosity about his role in the unfolding events, especially regarding his claims about aliens.

Scene 6
EXT. TOWN SQUARE – DAY

The battle for control of Jefferson’s water supply is introduced. The town is deeply divided and on edge over it.

**Beginning:** (External Dilemma): The scene opens with a heated town meeting in the town square, with residents passionately divided over the water supply issue.
**Middle:** (Betrayal): A community leader reveals an alliance with the water company, sparking outrage and deepening the divide.
**Ending:** (Suspense): The meeting ends with tensions high, leaving the outcome of the water conflict uncertain and the town on edge.

—

Scene 7
INT. REAL ESTATE OFFICE – DAY

McBride has a run-in with Jamaica Daly, who is the real estate agent renting him a home for the summer.

**Beginning:** (Uncomfortable Moment): McBride enters the real estate office and has an awkward encounter with Jamaica, who is clearly not pleased to see him.
**Middle:** (Misinterpretation): Jamaica's cold demeanor leads McBride to believe she knows more about his past than she lets on, causing friction.
**Ending:** (Suspense): Despite the tension, Jamaica reluctantly agrees to rent McBride the farmhouse, setting up future interactions filled with potential conflict.

—

Scene 8
EXT. LAKE – DAY

McBride, hungover and fishing, discovers a dead body in the water. It morphs into a reptilian creature then back to human form.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): McBride, clearly hungover, attempts to relax by fishing at the lake, but his peace is short-lived as he spots a body in the water.
**Middle:** (Major Twist): As McBride approaches the body, it horrifyingly morphs into a reptilian creature and then back to human, shocking him.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with McBride scrambling to process what he’s seen, knowing he must report this bizarre discovery.

—

Scene 9
INT. SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DAY

McBride reports the incident to Beck, who is hesitant to investigate and implies McBride could be a suspect.

**Beginning:** (Uncomfortable Moment): McBride nervously reports the strange incident to Beck, who listens with skepticism.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Beck’s hesitation to investigate the case leaves McBride uncertain of Beck’s intentions and true motives.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): Beck subtly implies that McBride could be a suspect, leaving McBride frustrated and more determined to uncover the truth himself.

—

Scene 10
INT. FARMHOUSE – DAY

Against Jamaica’s strong opposition, her mother Evelyn rents McBride the old family farmhouse.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Jamaica argues vehemently against renting the farmhouse to McBride, creating a tense family dynamic.
**Middle:** (Internal Dilemma): Evelyn, caught between her daughter’s concerns and her own motives, reluctantly decides to rent the farmhouse to McBride.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): McBride moves in, aware of the tension and curious about the secrets this old farmhouse might hold.

—

Scene 11
INT. TOWN HALL – NIGHT

Evelyn invites McBride to hear Daniel St. George talk about Reptilian shape-shifters. McBride accepts.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): Evelyn extends an invitation to McBride to attend a talk about Reptilian shape-shifters, piquing his curiosity.
**Middle:** (M. Mystery): During Daniel’s talk, McBride listens intently, trying to connect the dots between his recent experience and Daniel’s theories.
**Ending:** (Suspense): McBride agrees to attend, setting the stage for him to learn more about the town’s strange occurrences and Daniel’s knowledge.

—
Scene 12
INT. MORGUE – NIGHT

McBride leaves midway through the presentation and rushes to the morgue to see the body from the lake. Both the body and the doctor are missing.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride abruptly leaves the presentation, driven by urgency to see the body at the morgue.
**Middle:** (Mystery): Upon arrival, he discovers both the body and the doctor are missing, deepening the enigma.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with McBride in the empty morgue, bewildered and more determined to find out what’s going on.

—

Scene 13
EXT. JUDGE’S HOUSE – NIGHT

The judge ruling on the water case is found dead. He is Jamaica’s husband. Jamaica asks Colt to investigate, not trusting Beck. Colt agrees, arousing his suspicions and interest.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride arrives at the judge’s house, finding it swarmed with police after discovering the judge dead.
**Middle:** (Internal Dilemma): Jamaica, distraught and mistrusting Beck, pleads with McBride to investigate, revealing her personal stake in the matter.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): McBride agrees to investigate, arousing his suspicions about the true nature of the judge’s death and the broader conflict.

—

Scene 14
INT. MAYOR’S OFFICE – DAY

McBride teams up with the locals, including Mayor Hal Burton, who sees McBride as a chance to challenge Beck.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride enters the Mayor’s office, where tensions run high among the locals discussing Beck’s control.
**Middle:** (M. Intrigue): Mayor Burton and the locals see McBride as their hope to challenge Beck, revealing underlying alliances.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): The meeting concludes with a plan to take down Beck, but McBride is left wondering who he can truly trust.

—

Scene 15
INT. REHAB CENTER – DAY

Colt, Jake, and Evelyn break the doctor out of rehab to reveal what he knows about the body. The doctor reluctantly reveals Beck’s involvement but warns of the danger.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride and Jake arrive at the rehab center, determined to get answers from the doctor.
**Middle:** (Betrayal): The doctor reluctantly reveals Beck’s involvement in the cover-up, deepening McBride’s mistrust of Beck.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): The doctor warns McBride of the dangers of probing further, but McBride is more determined to uncover the truth.

—

Scene 16
INT. TOWN HALL – NIGHT

McBride attends town meetings, interrogates the Water Board, and researches the conflict’s history.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride enters the town hall, ready to question the Water Board.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): During the meeting, McBride’s persistent questions reveal more about the town’s dark history and the Water Board’s corruption.
**Ending:** (Mystery): The meeting ends with McBride’s growing suspicion, as the Water Board’s evasiveness hints at deeper secrets.

—

Scene 17
EXT. WATER FACILITY – DAY

Jefferson hires Saffron Rose, a hydrologist, to respond to the water company’s EIR. She teams up with Daniel.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): Saffron Rose arrives at the water facility, introduced as an expert to counter the EIR.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Saffron and Daniel begin their investigation, facing the challenge of countering the water company’s claims.
**Ending:** (Suspense): Their alliance solidifies as they uncover worrying data, hinting at a tough battle ahead.

—

Scene 18
EXT. HIGHWAY – NIGHT

Daniel and Saffron are stopped by Beck while driving. He threatens them.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Daniel and Saffron are driving when they are suddenly pulled over by Beck.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Beck’s threats create a tense standoff, testing their determination and resolve.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with Beck’s menacing warning, leaving Daniel and Saffron fearful but undeterred.

—

Scene 19
EXT. MOUNTAIN – DAY

Daniel flies Saffron up the mountain to look at the glaciers. His plane is sabotaged, forcing an emergency landing.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Daniel and Saffron take off, heading towards the glaciers.
**Middle:** (Major Twist): Mid-flight, they discover the plane has been sabotaged, forcing Daniel to make an emergency landing.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with them crash-landing in a remote area, unsure of their next move.

—

Scene 20
EXT. LAKE – DAY

McBride and Jamaica, on an excursion, embrace and almost kiss when she morphs into reptilian form and back.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): McBride and Jamaica share a moment by the lake, growing closer.
**Middle:** (Major Twist): Just as they are about to kiss, Jamaica involuntarily morphs into her reptilian form and back, shocking McBride.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with McBride’s stunned reaction, leaving their relationship in question.

—

Scene 21
INT. FARMHOUSE – NIGHT

McBride gets Evelyn to reveal everything about Jamaica’s heritage and the aliens’ need for the water ritual.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): McBride confronts Evelyn, demanding answers about Jamaica’s true nature.
**Middle:** (Mystery): Evelyn reveals the history of Jamaica’s heritage and the aliens’ need for the water ritual, explaining the town’s strange occurrences.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): The scene ends with McBride processing this revelation, unsure of what it means for his relationship with Jamaica and the town’s future.

—

Scene 22
INT. FARMHOUSE – DAY

The doctor calculates that Jamaica will lose her morph on July 4th. Jamaica decides to reveal herself at the celebration.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): The doctor explains the critical timing of Jamaica’s morph loss.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Jamaica wrestles with the decision to reveal herself, understanding the risks involved.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): The scene ends with Jamaica resolved to reveal herself at the celebration, setting up the climax.

—

Scene 23
EXT. SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DAY

Beck issues a warrant charging McBride and Jamaica with Solomon’s death. They are hunted by the police.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Beck issues the warrant, mobilizing the police to hunt down McBride and Jamaica.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): McBride and Jamaica evade capture, navigating the dangerous woods.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with them barely escaping, knowing the hunt is far from over.

—

Scene 24
EXT. ABANDONED BUILDING – NIGHT

Beck kidnaps Evelyn, threatening to kill her unless Jamaica turns herself in. Jamaica agrees, but McBride plans an ambush with Hal Burton.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Beck kidnaps Evelyn, using her as leverage against Jamaica.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): Jamaica agrees to turn herself in, but McBride secretly plans an ambush with Hal Burton.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with the ambush plan set in motion, tension high as they prepare for the confrontation.

—

Scene 25
EXT. MEETING LOCATION – NIGHT

Hal Burton is revealed as the alien in charge. He shoots Evelyn and threatens Jamaica. Jake attacks Burton, allowing McBride and Jamaica to escape.

**Beginning:** (Surprise): The ambush begins, but Hal Burton reveals himself as the alien in charge, shocking everyone.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Burton shoots Evelyn, escalating the danger and heightening the stakes.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with Burton threatening Jamaica, leaving her fate uncertain.

—

Scene 26
EXT. TOWN SQUARE – DAY

They reach the stage just in time for Jamaica to morph in front of everyone.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Jake attacks Burton, creating chaos and giving McBride and Jamaica a chance to escape.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): McBride and Jamaica race to the town square, pursued by Burton’s men.
**Ending:** (Major Twist): They reach the stage just in time for Jamaica to morph in front of the crowd, revealing the truth.

—

Scene 27
EXT. TOWN SQUARE – DAY

**Description:** A crazed person in the crowd shoots Jamaica. As she lies dying, McBride figures out a way to make all aliens lose their morph and reveal their presence.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): A crazed person in the crowd shoots Jamaica, causing chaos and panic.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): As she lies dying, McBride works desperately to figure out a way to reveal all the aliens.
**Ending:** (Major Twist): McBride succeeds, causing all aliens to lose their morph and reveal their presence to the shocked crowd.

—

Scene 28
EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY

Humanity unites to defeat the aliens. McBride and Jake ride off, back to the big city to face whatever lies in store for them.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): The scene opens with humanity uniting to fight against the aliens, showing coordinated efforts and battles.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): McBride and Jake, having played a pivotal role, prepare to leave Jefferson, reflecting on the ordeal and its impact.
**Ending:** (Hopeful Resolution): They ride off into the distance, heading back to the city, ready to face whatever comes next, leaving a sense of hope and new beginnings.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Scene Requirements

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… An outline is constantly changing. It’s a good starting point.
—

Scene 1

EXT. FOG-SHROUDED FOREST – NIGHT

Two combatants fight over a fresh water spring. One is human, the other a strange reptilian creature. The reptilian pierces the human through the heart and kills him. We cut to Jamaica jumping up in bed, awakened by the nightmare.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with a mysterious fight and ends with Jamaica waking up, setting a tone of danger and intrigue.
– **Essence:** Introduce the audience to the conflict between humans and aliens, and establish a link to Jamaica.
– **Conflict:** The battle over the water spring, hinting at the larger conflict over water.
– **Subtext:** The water is a precious resource vital for both species.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for understanding the conflict; fear of the unknown threat posed by aliens.

—

Scene 2

INT. MC BRIDE'S CAR – DAY

Colt McBride, a suspended cop, is driving into Jefferson with his new K9 partner, Jake. McBride is not a fan of Jake.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with McBride's reluctance and ends with his determination to make a fresh start.
– **Essence:** Establish McBride’s current situation and introduce his strained relationship with Jake.
– **Conflict:** McBride's internal struggle with his suspension and disdain for Jake.
– **Subtext:** McBride’s desire to escape his past failures and start anew.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for a new beginning; fear of being unable to change.

—

Scene 3

EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY

Sheriff Del Beck stops McBride for a minor traffic violation. Their interaction reveals McBride’s suspension and Beck’s control over Jefferson.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with McBride being pulled over and ends with tension between him and Beck.
– **Essence:** Establish the antagonist and the power dynamics in Jefferson.
– **Conflict:** The clash between McBride’s defiance and Beck’s authoritarian rule.
– **Subtext:** Beck’s underlying threat and control over Jefferson.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope that McBride can resist Beck’s control; fear that Beck’s power is too great.

—

Scene 4

EXT. JEFFERSON TOWN – DAY

McBride drives into Jefferson, noticing a strong police presence for such a small town.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with McBride’s observation and ends with his suspicion.
– **Essence:** Highlight the unusual and oppressive atmosphere in Jefferson.
– **Conflict:** McBride’s unease and the town’s strange situation.
– **Subtext:** The hidden secrets and tensions within Jefferson.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to uncover the truth; fear of what lies beneath the surface.

—

Scene 5

EXT. JEFFERSON AIRFIELD – DAY

Daniel St. George, an alien investigator/charlatan, pilots his small plane into Jefferson for a speaking engagement.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with Daniel’s arrival and ends with anticipation for his engagement.
– **Essence:** Introduce Daniel and set up his role in the story.
– **Conflict:** Daniel’s struggle to be taken seriously versus his charlatan image.
– **Subtext:** The balance between his genuine knowledge and his deceptive persona.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope that Daniel can provide valuable information; fear that he’s just a fraud.

—

Scene 6

EXT. TOWN SQUARE – DAY

The battle for control of Jefferson’s water supply is introduced. The town is deeply divided and on edge over it.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with a divided town and ends with rising tension.
– **Essence:** Establish the central conflict over the water supply.
– **Conflict:** The town’s division and rising tensions.
– **Subtext:** The water supply’s critical importance to both humans and aliens.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for resolution; fear of escalating conflict.

—

Scene 7

iNT. REAL ESTATE OFFICE – DAY

McBride has a run-in with Jamaica Daly, who is the real estate agent renting him a home for the summer.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with tension and ends with reluctant cooperation.
– **Essence:** Establish the strained relationship between McBride and Jamaica.
– **Conflict:** The clash between their personalities and hidden secrets.
– **Subtext:** The unresolved issues and mutual suspicion.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for a working relationship; fear of further conflict.

—

Scene 8

EXT. LAKE – DAY

McBride, hungover and fishing, discovers a dead body in the water. It morphs into a reptilian creature then back to human form.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with McBride’s solitude and ends with a shocking discovery.
– **Essence:** Introduce the alien threat and propel the plot forward.
– **Conflict:** McBride’s shock and the mystery of the body’s transformation.
– **Subtext:** The hidden alien presence and the danger it represents.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to solve the mystery; fear of the unknown threat.

—

Scene 9

INT. SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DAY

McBride reports the incident to Beck, who is hesitant to investigate and implies McBride could be a suspect.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with McBride’s report and ends with distrust.
– **Essence:** Establish the antagonistic relationship between McBride and Beck.
– **Conflict:** McBride’s insistence versus Beck’s reluctance and suspicion.
– **Subtext:** Beck’s hidden agenda and control over the investigation.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for cooperation; fear of being undermined by Beck.

—

Scene 10

INT. FARMHOUSE – DAY

Against Jamaica’s strong opposition, her mother Evelyn rents McBride the old family farmhouse.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with opposition and ends with reluctant acceptance.
– **Essence:** Establish McBride’s new home and deepen the relationship dynamics.
– **Conflict:** The disagreement between Jamaica and Evelyn.
– **Subtext:** Evelyn’s hidden motives and Jamaica’s protective instincts.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for a safe place; fear of underlying tensions.

—

Scene 11

INT. TOWN HALL – NIGHT

Evelyn invites McBride to hear Daniel St. George talk about Reptilian shape-shifters. McBride accepts.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with an invitation and ends with McBride’s decision to attend.
– **Essence:** Introduce the conspiracy theories and potential truths.
– **Conflict:** McBride’s skepticism versus Evelyn’s belief.
– **Subtext:** The search for truth and the potential for uncovering secrets.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for understanding; fear of misinformation.

—

Scene 12

INT. MORGUE – NIGHT

McBride leaves midway through the presentation and rushes to the morgue to see the body from the lake. Both the body and the doctor are missing.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with McBride’s urgency and ends with a dead end.
– **Essence:** Heighten the mystery and introduce new obstacles.
– **Conflict:** McBride’s investigation thwarted by missing evidence.
– **Subtext:** The cover-up and deeper conspiracy.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to find clues; fear of being stonewalled.

—

Scene 13

EXT. JUDGE’S HOUSE – NIGHT

The judge ruling on the water case is found dead. He is Jamaica’s husband. Jamaica asks Colt to investigate, not trusting Beck. Colt agrees, arousing his suspicions and interest.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with a discovery and ends with a new alliance.
– **Essence:** Strengthen the plot’s stakes and deepen character connections.
– **Conflict:** The investigation into the judge’s death and Jamaica’s mistrust.
– **Subtext:** The web of secrets and alliances.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to uncover the truth; fear of further danger.

—

Scene 14

INT. MAYOR’S OFFICE – DAY

McBride teams up with the locals, including Mayor Hal Burton, who sees McBride as a chance to challenge Beck.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with planning and ends with a new alliance.
– **Essence:** Establish allies and set up the plan to challenge Beck.
– **Conflict:** The need for cooperation versus the town’s fear of Beck.
– **Subtext:** The hidden power dynamics and potential betrayal.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to take down Beck; fear of failure and retribution.

—

Scene 15

INT. REHAB CENTER – DAY

Colt, Jake, and Evelyn break the doctor out of rehab to get answers.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with a breakout and ends with new information.
– **Essence:** Show the lengths McBride will go to for the truth.
– **Conflict:** The risk of breaking the law versus the need for answers.
– **Subtext:** The doctor’s crucial knowledge and the stakes involved.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to get answers; fear of getting caught.

—

Scene 16

INT. TOWN HALL – NIGHT

McBride attends town meetings, interrogates the Water Board, and researches the conflict’s history.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with investigation and ends with growing suspicion.
– **Essence:** Deepen the investigation and reveal the town’s history.
– **Conflict:** The Water Board’s resistance and McBride’s persistence.
– **Subtext:** The underlying corruption and secrets of the water conflict.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to uncover the truth; fear of being stonewalled.

—

Scene 17

EXT. WATER FACILITY – DAY

Jefferson hires Saffron Rose, a hydrologist, to respond to the water company’s EIR. She teams up with Daniel.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with Saffron’s introduction and ends with her alliance with Daniel.
– **Essence:** Introduce new allies and deepen the investigation.
– **Conflict:** The challenge of countering the EIR.
– **Subtext:** The expertise needed to challenge the water company.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to counter the EIR; fear of failure.

—

Scene 18

EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY

Daniel and Saffron are stopped by Beck while driving. He threatens them.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with a journey and ends with a threat.
– **Essence:** Heighten the tension and show Beck’s menace.
– **Conflict:** Beck’s threat versus Daniel and Saffron’s determination.
– **Subtext:** The danger Beck poses to anyone challenging him.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to continue their investigation; fear of Beck’s power.

—

Scene 19

EXT. MOUNTAIN – DAY

Daniel flies Saffron up the mountain to look at the glaciers. His plane is sabotaged, forcing an emergency landing.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with an investigation and ends with a crash.
– **Essence:** Show the dangers of their investigation.
– **Conflict:** The sabotage and their survival.
– **Subtext:** The lengths to which their enemies will go.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to gather evidence; fear for their lives.

—

Scene 20

EXT. RIVER – DAY

McBride and Jamaica, on an excursion, embrace and almost kiss when she morphs into reptilian form and back.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with romance and ends with shock.
– **Essence:** Reveal Jamaica’s hidden nature and deepen the emotional stakes.
– **Conflict:** McBride’s feelings versus the shocking revelation.
– **Subtext:** The hidden truth about Jamaica’s identity.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for a relationship; fear of her alien nature.

—

Scene 21

INT. FARMHOUSE – NIGHT

McBride gets Evelyn to reveal everything about Jamaica’s heritage and the aliens’ need for the water ritual.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with questions and ends with revelations.
– **Essence:** Uncover the truth about Jamaica and the water ritual.
– **Conflict:** Evelyn’s fear versus McBride’s insistence.
– **Subtext:** The weight of the hidden truth and its implications.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to understand the situation; fear of the truth’s consequences.

—

Scene 22

INT. FARMHOUSE – DAY

The doctor calculates that Jamaica will lose her morph on July 4th. Jamaica decides to reveal herself at the celebration.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with a ticking clock and ends with a plan.
– **Essence:** Set up the climax and heighten the stakes.
– **Conflict:** The urgency of the situation versus the danger.
– **Subtext:** The importance of the ritual and the risks involved.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to reveal the truth; fear of the consequences.

—

Scene 23

EXT. SHERIFF”S OFFICE– DAY

Beck issues a warrant charging McBride and Jamaica with Solomon’s death. They are hunted by the police.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with pursuit and ends with evasion.
– **Essence:** Heighten the danger and the stakes.
– **Conflict:** The police hunt versus their escape.
– **Subtext:** The increasing desperation and danger.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to evade capture; fear of being caught.

—

Scene 24

EXT. ABANDONED BUILDING – DAY

Beck kidnaps Evelyn, threatening to kill her unless Jamaica turns herself in. Jamaica agrees, but McBride plans an ambush with Hal Burton.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with a threat and ends with a plan.
– **Essence:** Heighten the personal stakes and set up the climax.
– **Conflict:** Beck’s threat versus McBride’s plan.
– **Subtext:** The potential for betrayal and danger.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to rescue Evelyn; fear of failure.

—

Scene 25

EXT. MEETING LOCATION – NIGHT

Hal Burton is revealed as the alien in charge. He shoots Evelyn and threatens Jamaica. Jake attacks Burton, allowing McBride and Jamaica to escape.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with an ambush and ends with betrayal.
– **Essence:** Reveal the true antagonist and heighten the stakes.
– **Conflict:** The ambush versus the betrayal.
– **Subtext:** The hidden power dynamics and ultimate threat.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to survive; fear of Burton’s power.

—

Scene 26

EXT. TOWN SQUARE STAGE – DAY

They reach the stage just in time for Jamaica to morph in front of everyone.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with escape and ends with revelation.
– **Essence:** Show the climax and reveal the alien presence.
– **Conflict:** The escape and morph versus the danger.
– **Subtext:** The truth about the aliens and the town’s reaction.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to reveal the truth; fear of the crowd’s reaction.

—

Scene 27

EXT. TOWN SQUARE – DAY

A crazed person in the crowd shoots Jamaica. As she lies dying, McBride figures out a way to make all aliens lose their morph and reveal their presence.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with a shooting and ends with a revelation.
– **Essence:** Show the ultimate sacrifice and reveal the aliens.
– **Conflict:** The shooting versus the revelation.
– **Subtext:** The price of truth and the fight for humanity.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope to unite humanity; fear of chaos.

—

#### Scene 28

EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY

Humanity unites to defeat the aliens. McBride and Jake ride off, back to the big city to face whatever lies in store for them.

**Scene Requirements:**
– **Scene Arc:** Starts with unity and ends with a new journey.
– **Essence:** Show the resolution and McBride’s new path.
– **Conflict:** Humanity’s fight versus the alien threat.
– **Subtext:** The hope for a new beginning.
– **Hope/Fear:** Hope for a fresh start; fear of the future.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Intriguing Moments

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Intrigue will hold the audience’s attention.

### Genre: Sci-Fi Thriller
### Concept: A suspended cop discovers that a multinational corporation’s attempted takeover of a small town’s water supply is really a front for an alien invasion of the Earth.
### Structure:
– Act 1: Colt McBride arrives in town, discovers the body, and begins investigating despite opposition.
– Act 2: Colt teams up with locals and delves deeper into the mystery, encountering various obstacles and uncovering secrets.
– Act 3: Major revelations and increased danger as the true scale of the conspiracy is revealed.
– Act 4: The climactic confrontation and resolution, exposing the aliens and saving humanity.

### Characters:
– **Colt McBride**: Protagonist, suspended cop seeking redemption.
– **Del Beck**: Antagonist, sheriff, secretly an alien.
– **Jamaica Daly**: Love interest, unknowingly part alien.
– **Evelyn Daly**: Jamaica's mother, keeper of crucial secrets.
– **Hal Burton**: Mayor, later revealed as the true alien leader.

—

### Act 1: Intriguing Moments

1. **Intrigue**:
– **Moment**: Colt notices something off about the townspeople when he first arrives in Jefferson.
– **Scene**: As Colt drives through town, he sees people acting strangely around water sources – some avoid it, others seem oddly fixated on it.

2. **Secret**:
– **Moment**: Colt discovers a hidden room in his motel.
– **Scene**: While unpacking, Colt accidentally finds a trapdoor under the bed, leading to a small, concealed room filled with surveillance equipment monitoring the town.

3. **Covert Agenda**:
– **Moment**: Colt overhears a suspicious conversation between Mayor Burton and Sheriff Beck.
– **Scene**: Colt sneaks into the town hall and listens to Burton and Beck discussing “the shipment” and ensuring “no one finds out the truth about the water.”

4. **Hidden Identity**:
– **Moment**: Jamaica’s eyes momentarily flash reptilian during a heated moment.
– **Scene**: During a tense town hall meeting, Jamaica stands up to Beck, and for a split second, her eyes change, unnoticed by most but seen by Colt.

—

### Act 2: Intriguing Moments

1. **Conspiracy**:
– **Moment**: Colt finds classified documents about the water company’s real activities.
– **Scene**: Breaking into the water company’s office, Colt discovers hidden files detailing shipments and coded messages hinting at something more sinister than corporate greed.

2. **Scheme**:
– **Moment**: Evelyn reveals a partial truth to Colt.
– **Scene**: Evelyn reluctantly tells Colt that the water is special, hinting at a secret but not fully revealing Jamaica’s heritage or the full scale of the alien plan.

3. **Superior Position**:
– **Moment**: The audience sees Beck’s alien form and his communication with other aliens.
– **Scene**: Beck, in his hidden lair, sheds his human guise and contacts his superiors, discussing their timeline and the need to control Colt.

4. **Cover Up**:
– **Moment**: Evidence of the body Colt found is tampered with.
– **Scene**: Colt returns to the lake with reinforcements, but the body has been removed, and any traces of the alien morph are gone, leading others to doubt his story.

—

### Act 3: Intriguing Moments

1. **Mystery**:
– **Moment**: Colt uncovers an old photograph showing Beck in the town decades ago, unchanged.
– **Scene**: Researching in the local library, Colt finds an old newspaper with a picture of Beck from 50 years ago, looking exactly the same, hinting at his alien nature.

2. **Hidden Identity**:
– **Moment**: Jamaica undergoes a partial transformation.
– **Scene**: During a quiet moment with Colt, Jamaica’s alien features partially emerge, and she panics, revealing her confusion and fear about her true nature.

3. **Covert Agenda**:
– **Moment**: Evelyn reveals the full truth to Colt and Jamaica.
– **Scene**: Under threat, Evelyn finally tells Colt and Jamaica about the alien heritage, the renewal ritual, and the real purpose of the water company.

4. **Scheme**:
– **Moment**: Hal Burton’s betrayal is hinted at.
– **Scene**: Colt notices inconsistencies in Hal Burton’s support and a slip of the tongue that makes Colt suspicious of his true loyalty.

—

### Act 4: Intriguing Moments

1. **Cover Up**:
– **Moment**: Beck tries to frame Colt for a major crime.
– **Scene**: Beck sets up a scenario where Colt is found with planted evidence, making it appear he is the one sabotaging the water supply, causing the townspeople to turn against him.

2. **Superior Position**:
– **Moment**: The audience learns Burton’s true identity before Colt does.
– **Scene**: A scene shows Burton contacting higher alien authorities, revealing his role as the true alien leader, while Colt is still unaware and planning to trust him.

3. **Hidden Identity**:
– **Moment**: Jamaica’s full transformation.
– **Scene**: On stage at the 4th of July celebration, Jamaica morphs completely, revealing her alien form to everyone, causing chaos and forcing Colt to act quickly.

4. **Mystery**:
– **Moment**: The final piece of the puzzle about the water’s properties is revealed.
– **Scene**: Colt discovers a hidden document or relic that explains how the water was originally discovered and altered by the aliens, providing the key to reversing their control.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Emotional Moments

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Emotional Moments ad depth.

### Concept
In a town where aliens use water as a conduit for assimilation, Colt McBride's investigation reveals a sinister ritual that could alter the fate of humanity forever.

### Characters
– **Colt McBride**: Protagonist, a suspended cop seeking redemption and battling inner demons.
– **Del Beck**: Antagonist, the town’s sheriff hiding his true alien nature.
– **Jamaica Daly**: Femme fatale, unaware of her alien heritage and caught between her ambition and identity.
– **Evelyn Daly**: Jamaica’s mother, who knows the truth about the aliens and her daughter’s heritage.
– **Hal Burton**: The mayor, secretly the leader of the aliens.

### 4-Act Structure

**Act 1:**
1. **Opening**: Colt McBride on the freeway, driving into Jefferson.
2. **Inciting Incident**: Colt discovers a dead body that morphs into a reptilian creature.
3. **Turning Point**: Beck gives Colt 24 hours to leave town or be charged with murder.

**Act 2:**
1. **New Plan**: Colt teams up with locals, including Mayor Hal Burton.
2. **Plan in Action**: Colt investigates the water company and meets Jamaica Daly.
3. **Midpoint Turning Point**: Jamaica morphs during a near-kiss with Colt.

**Act 3:**
1. **Rethink Everything**: Evelyn reveals Jamaica's alien heritage and the aliens’ need for the water.
2. **New Plan**: Jamaica decides to reveal her true form at the 4th of July celebration.
3. **Turning Point**: Beck kidnaps Evelyn; Hal Burton reveals himself as the true alien leader.

**Act 4:**
1. **Climax**: Jamaica’s public reveal and subsequent shooting.
2. **Resolution**: Colt figures out a way to expose all aliens.
3. **Ending**: Colt and Jake ride off to face new challenges.

—

### Emotional Moments

**Act 1**

1. **Surprise (Positive Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt is fishing and discovers the body that morphs into a reptilian creature.
– **How It Plays Out**: As Colt pulls the body from the water, he’s startled when it suddenly shifts into a reptilian form and then back to human. This moment shocks Colt, but also fuels his determination to uncover the truth.

2. **Trigger Their Wounds (Negative Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt’s interaction with Sheriff Beck after the discovery.
– **How It Plays Out**: Beck’s dismissive and threatening behavior triggers Colt’s memories of his past failures and the young person’s death that led to his suspension. Colt’s anger and guilt are palpable as he’s forced to confront his demons.

3. **Bonding (Positive Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt’s initial interactions with Mayor Hal Burton.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt and Hal bond over their mutual disdain for Beck’s authoritarian control. Hal’s support provides Colt with a sense of alliance and hope, making him feel less isolated in his quest.

4. **Moral Issue (Negative Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt is pressured by Beck to leave town within 24 hours.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt faces a moral dilemma: leave to avoid false charges, or stay and fight for justice. This moment weighs heavily on Colt as he contemplates risking his freedom to uncover the truth.

**Act 2**

1. **Love (Positive Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt and Jamaica’s growing attraction.
– **How It Plays Out**: As Colt spends more time with Jamaica, their mutual attraction becomes evident. This budding romance provides a softer, more human side to the otherwise intense plot, giving Colt a glimpse of happiness and normalcy.

2. **Emotional Dilemma (Negative Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt’s decision to trust the misfits with his recorded evidence.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt wrestles with the decision to share his video of the morphing body, knowing it’s a significant risk. The misfits’ acceptance provides relief but also increases the stakes.

3. **Betrayal (Negative Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Jamaica’s partial reveal to Colt during their near-kiss.
– **How It Plays Out**: When Jamaica morphs, Colt feels a deep sense of betrayal, questioning everything he believed about her. This revelation forces Colt to grapple with his feelings and the reality of the alien threat.

4. **Courage (Positive Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt’s resolve to continue the investigation despite the risks.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt’s determination shines through as he decides to press on with the investigation, showing his courage and commitment to uncovering the truth, regardless of the personal cost.

**Act 3**

1. **Success/Winning (Positive Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Evelyn’s full disclosure about the alien conspiracy.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt and Jamaica feel a sense of victory and validation when Evelyn reveals the aliens’ plan and Jamaica’s true heritage. This moment strengthens their resolve to stop the invasion.

2. **Hidden Weakness (Negative Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt’s internal struggle with his feelings for Jamaica.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt is torn between his duty to expose the aliens and his love for Jamaica, now knowing her alien heritage. This internal conflict exposes his vulnerability and the complexity of his emotions.

3. **Distress (Negative Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Beck’s kidnapping of Evelyn.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt and Jamaica are thrown into emotional turmoil as they scramble to save Evelyn, heightening the tension and urgency of their mission.

4. **Excitement (Positive Emotion)**
– **Moment**: The plan to reveal the aliens at the 4th of July celebration.
– **How It Plays Out**: The group’s excitement and hope build as they prepare for the public reveal, believing they are on the brink of a significant breakthrough in their fight against the alien invasion.

**Act 4**

1. **Sacrifice (Negative Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Jamaica’s decision to go through with the public reveal despite the dangers.
– **How It Plays Out**: Jamaica’s courage and willingness to sacrifice her life for the greater good is a poignant moment that underscores her character’s growth and the stakes involved.

2. **Trigger Their Wounds (Negative Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Jamaica’s shooting and Colt’s reaction.
– **How It Plays Out**: As Jamaica lies dying, Colt’s deep-seated guilt and fear of failure resurface. This emotional moment is devastating for Colt, highlighting his personal struggle and the high cost of their battle.

3. **Love (Positive Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt and Jamaica’s final moments together.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt holds Jamaica as she dies, expressing his love and admiration for her bravery. This tender moment underscores the personal stakes and emotional depth of their relationship.

4. **Success/Winning (Positive Emotion)**
– **Moment**: Colt’s final plan to expose all aliens.
– **How It Plays Out**: Colt successfully implements a plan that forces all aliens to reveal their true forms, leading to humanity’s victory. This triumphant moment provides a sense of closure and accomplishment for Colt and the audience.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Reveals

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Reveals keep the audience guessing and engaged.

### Colt McBride

**Act 1:**
– **Set-up:** Colt’s mistrust and dislike for his K9 partner, Jake, is shown through their interactions.
– **Reveal:** Jake saves Colt during a critical moment, demonstrating loyalty and forging a bond between them.
– **Set-up:** Colt is seen repeatedly glancing at a photo of a young person he failed to protect.
– **Reveal:** The photo is of the victim whose death led to Colt’s suspension, deepening our understanding of his guilt.

**Act 2:**
– **Set-up:** Colt records the body morphing in the lake, but doesn’t reveal this to anyone immediately.
– **Reveal:** He shows the video to the town’s misfits to gain their trust and support.
– **Set-up:** Colt’s growing attraction to Jamaica despite his better judgment.
– **Reveal:** When she morphs during their near-kiss, Colt’s shock and confusion create new conflict and deepen his involvement.

**Act 3:**
– **Set-up:** Colt’s alliance with Mayor Hal Burton, who provides information and resources.
– **Reveal:** Hal is actually the mastermind alien, using Colt to flush out resistance.

**Act 4:**
– **Set-up:** Colt’s knowledge of alien weaknesses from Evelyn’s revelations.
– **Reveal:** He uses this knowledge to devise a plan that exposes all aliens, turning the tide in the climax.

### Del Beck

**Act 1:**
– **Set-up:** Beck’s control over the town is established through his interactions with Colt and the townspeople.
– **Reveal:** Beck’s true alien nature is hinted at through subtle, unusual behavior.
– **Set-up:** Beck’s seemingly charming demeanor hides a ruthless side.
– **Reveal:** His brutal interrogation of a local who aids Colt, showing his true colors.

**Act 2:**
– **Set-up:** Beck’s meetings with water company executives, hinting at larger, more sinister plans.
– **Reveal:** The water shipments are for maintaining alien morphs worldwide.

**Act 3:**
– **Set-up:** Beck’s threats and manipulation of Evelyn and Jamaica.
– **Reveal:** Beck’s partial morph in a moment of desperation, revealing his alien form to Colt and Jamaica.

**Act 4:**
– **Set-up:** Beck’s orders to the alien forces during the 4th of July celebration.
– **Reveal:** Beck’s ultimate defeat and full alien form being exposed to the town.

### Jamaica Daly

**Act 1:**
– **Set-up:** Jamaica’s polished, professional look and her position on the water board.
– **Reveal:** Her ambitions mask deep-seated insecurities and confusion about her identity.
– **Set-up:** Her initial flirtation and probing of Colt.
– **Reveal:** Her genuine attraction to him, complicated by her hidden heritage.

**Act 2:**
– **Set-up:** Jamaica’s insider information about the water board, shared cautiously with Colt.
– **Reveal:** Her growing trust in Colt and internal conflict about aiding him.
– **Set-up:** Subtle hints about her feeling different or out of place.
– **Reveal:** The shocking moment she morphs into her reptilian form during their near-kiss.

**Act 3:**
– **Set-up:** Jamaica’s relationship with her mother, Evelyn, and the secrets they share.
– **Reveal:** The truth about her alien heritage and the necessity of the renewal ritual.

**Act 4:**
– **Set-up:** Jamaica’s public reveal plan during the 4th of July celebration.
– **Reveal:** Her powerful, emotional speech and transformation, leading to her tragic, sacrificial death.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Character Action Track
My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Make your lead characters more action oriented.

### Colt McBride

**Act 1:**
1. **Drive into Jefferson with Jake:** Colt's rough handling of the K9 partner shows his initial indifference.
2. **Discovering the body in the lake:** Colt pulls out the body, observes it morph into a reptilian creature, and records the morph on his phone.
3. **Confrontation with Sheriff Beck:** Colt refuses to leave town despite Beck’s threats, showcasing his determination and defiance.

**Act 2:**
4. **Teaming up with locals:** Colt gathers a group of town misfits who distrust the authorities, showing his ability to inspire and lead underdogs.
5. **Investigating the water company:** He sneaks into the water plant at night, finds evidence of the alien activity, and narrowly escapes capture.
6. **Developing a relationship with Jamaica:** Colt takes Jamaica on a date to the outskirts of town where they discuss their troubled pasts, building their bond.

**Act 3:**
7. **Confronting Evelyn for the truth:** Colt forces Evelyn to reveal Jamaica’s heritage by showing her the evidence he has collected, combining tough questioning with empathy.
8. **Planning the public reveal:** He organizes a secret meeting with trusted town members to devise the plan for Jamaica’s revelation.
9. **Rescuing Jamaica from Beck:** Colt leads a covert operation to free Jamaica and Evelyn from Beck’s custody, using his tactical skills.

**Act 4:**
10. **Defending the stage during Jamaica’s reveal:** Colt physically protects Jamaica from the crowd, demonstrating his commitment to her and the mission.
11. **Revealing the alien presence:** He uses the recording of the body morphing and broadcasts it to the crowd and beyond, exposing the aliens.
12. **Final confrontation with Hal Burton:** Colt fights and defeats Burton with Jake’s help, culminating in a dramatic showdown.

### Del Beck

**Act 1:**
1. **Traffic stop with Colt:** Beck uses this encounter to subtly intimidate Colt, establishing his authority.
2. **Interrogation of locals:** Beck questions townsfolk aggressively to see who might be aiding Colt, using his charm to disarm and his ruthlessness to instill fear.
3. **Warning Colt:** Beck gives Colt a stern ultimatum, emphasizing the consequences of defiance.

**Act 2:**
4. **Sabotaging Colt’s efforts:** Beck arranges for Colt’s allies to be harassed or arrested on trumped-up charges.
5. **Meeting with water company executives:** He discusses the progress of the alien mission and pressures them to expedite the water shipments.
6. **Monitoring Jamaica:** Beck discreetly observes Jamaica’s interactions with Colt, showing his deep investment in maintaining control.

**Act 3:**
7. **Kidnapping Evelyn:** Beck personally leads the abduction, ensuring it is done quietly and efficiently.
8. **Setting a trap for Colt:** He leaks false information to lure Colt into an ambush, demonstrating his strategic cunning.
9. **Revealing his alien nature:** In a moment of desperation, Beck partially morphs to intimidate and assert dominance over Colt and Jamaica.

**Act 4:**
10. **Final showdown with Colt:** Beck fights Colt with enhanced alien abilities, showing his true form.
11. **Commanding the alien forces:** He orders the aliens to attack during the 4th of July celebration, aiming for chaos.
12. **Defeat and exposure:** Beck is ultimately overpowered, his alien nature exposed to the entire town.

### Jamaica Daly

**Act 1:**
1. **Water board meetings:** Jamaica uses her charm to manipulate decisions in favor of the water company, unaware of its true purpose.
2. **Initial meeting with Colt:** She flirts with Colt while subtly probing for information about his investigation.
3. **Expressing ambition:** Jamaica discusses her career goals with colleagues, hinting at her underlying insecurities.

**Act 2:**
4. **Helping Colt investigate:** She provides him with inside information about the water board, taking calculated risks.
5. **Date with Colt:** Jamaica takes Colt to a secluded spot where they share a vulnerable moment, revealing her softer side.
6. **Confusion and fear:** After morphing into her reptilian form in front of Colt, she panics and distances herself from him.

**Act 3:**
7. **Confronting Evelyn:** Jamaica demands the truth from her mother, leading to an emotional breakdown.
8. **Deciding to reveal herself:** She resolves to expose the aliens, showing courage and self-sacrifice.
9. **Kidnapped and imprisoned:** Jamaica remains defiant, attempting to escape and protect her mother despite being captured by Beck.

**Act 4:**
10. **Public reveal:** Jamaica stands on stage and morphs in front of the crowd, fully embracing her alien heritage.
11. **Final moments:** She delivers a poignant speech about identity and acceptance before being shot, inspiring the townspeople.
12. **Dying wish:** Jamaica urges Colt to continue the fight, passing the mantle of protector to him.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's New Outline Beats!

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

I learned that…a "treasure hunt" is a really good way to look at this process

Protagonist: Colt McBride
Antagonist: Del Beck
Triangle Character: Jamaica Daly

Act 1:
Opening – In a fog shrouded forest we see two combatants fighting over a fresh water spring. A battle to the death. One is human, the other a strange reptilian creature. The Reptilian pierces the human through the heart and kills him. We cut to Jamaica jumping up in bed, awakened by the nightmare.

Colt McBride, suspended cop, on the freeway, driving into Jefferson. Wants to get away from the disaster of his big city life. In the back of the car, his new K9 partner, Jake. McBride is not a fan.

Sheriff Del Beck stops him for a minor traffic violation. Their interaction reveals McBride’s past (on suspension, pending hearing – his career at stake)and Beck’s iron clad control of Jefferson. A Hitchcock type portrayal of authority.

McBride drives into Jefferson. There is a strong police presence for such a backwater town. Why?

Daniel St. George, an alien investigator / charlatan pilots his small plane into Jefferson for a speaking engagement.

The battle for control of Jeffersons water supply introduced. The town is deeply divided and on edge over it.

McBride has a run in with Jamaica Daly. Unfortunately she is the real estate agent renting him a home for the summer. Not the best intro.

Inciting Incident: McBride is hungover, fishing at a lake. He discovers a dead body in the water. As he’s pulling it out of the water, it suddenly morphs into a strange reptilian creature, then back into human form. WTF?

McBride reports the incident to Beck and insists that he investigate. Beck is hesitant to do so. Implies that McBride could be a suspect.

Against Jamaica’s strong opposition, her mother, Evelyn rents McBride the old family farmhouse.

He becomes friendly with Evelyn. She invites him to go with her to hear alien investigator, Daniel St. George, talk about Reptilian shape shifters. McBride accepts.

McBride leaves midway through the presentation and rushes to the morgue to get a look at the body from the lake. When he gets there both the body and the doctor have gone missing.

Turning Point: Judge about to rule on the water case is found dead. He is Jamaica’s husband. Jamaica asks Colt to investigate because she doesn’t trust Beck and the police. Colt agrees, but she arouses his suspicions – and his interest. Femme fatale?

Act 2:
New plan – Realizing that he needs help, McBride teams up with some of the locals. Everyone experiences Beck’s threatening presence.

Plan in action – Mayor Hal Burton becomes his staunchest ally. He sees McBride as someone who can finally help him challenge Beck’s vice like grip on Jefferson.

Colt needs to find the Doctor. He is sequestered away in rehab. Colt, Jake and the Grandma break him out.

McBride works with Daniel, but also starts to look into the unscrupulous dealings of the water company. He attends town meetings, interrogates the Jefferson Water Board. Researches the history of the conflict.

Jefferson hires Saffron Rose, a water hydrologist to help them respond to the EIR that the water company is pushing through.

Daniel and Saffron begin to investigate together. Yin and Yang. They start to fall for each other.

They are stopped by Beck while driving. He threatens them.

Daniel flies Saffron up the mountain to get a closer look at the glaciers. His plane has been sabotaged and they have to make an emergency landing. They spend the night on the mountain.

Midpoint Turning Point – Against his better judgement, McBride starts to fall in love with Jamaica. On an excursion they embrace, about to kiss, when she suddenly morphs into reptilian form, then back into her human form.

Act 3:
Rethink everything – Jamaica is unaware that she is the offspring of interspecies breeding. Evelyn has kept it from her because Beck threatened to kill Jamaica if she ever revealed it.

McBride gets Evelyn to tell them everything. The aliens need to perform a ritual with the water from Jefferson to maintain their human morph when they are 28 years old. The water company is really shipping the water to aliens all over the world for this purpose.

New plan – Jamaica needs to perform the ritual or she will lose her human form forever.

The local doctor makes some calculations and declares that she will lose her morph on July 4th.

Jamaica decides to let the morph go and reveal herself and the alien presence at the big 4th of July celebration in Jefferson. McBride is heart broken, but agrees it is the best plan. Now they just have to keep her safe until then. Ticking clock.

Beck issues a warrant charging McBride and Jamaica with Solomon’s death. They are hunted by the police.

Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift – The aliens find out Jamaica’s plan and Beck kidnaps Evelyn, threatens to kill her unless Jamaica turns herself in. Jamaica agrees, but McBride has enlisted the help of Hal Burton and they plan to ambush Beck at the meeting…

Except that Hal Burton is really the Alien in charge. Beck was just a front. Hal shoots Evelyn. Jamaica is next.

Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Jake attacks Burton and they manage to escape. McBride gets Jamaica to the stage just in time where she morphs into Reptilian form in front of everyone. Ticking clock -there is an actual countdown timer on the stage.

People are freaked. A crazed person in the crowd shoots Jamaica.

Resolution – As she lies dying, McBride figures out a way to get all aliens to instantly lose their morph and reveal their presence.

Humanity unites and defeats the aliens.

McBride and Jake ride off, back to the big city to face whatever lies in store for them.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Beat Sheet, Draft 1

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… The Beat Sheet is about Big Picture Decisions

Concept – A suspended cop discovers that a corporate attempt to seize control of a small town’s water supply is part of an alien plan to conquer the human race.

Plot Choice – The Riddle.The aliens plan on conquering the human race by stealth, not brute force. Colt knows they are here, but since they are in human form, how can he tell them apart? How many are there? Who is their leader? What is their plan and how can he stop them? They have a weakness, but can he discover it in time to save the planet?
Character Structure – Protagonist vs. Antagonist

Lead Characters
Protagonist – Colt McBride is a suspended cop – damaged goods and borderline alcoholic – who decides to get away for some hunting and fishing before his hearing only to find that his first catch lands him more than he bargained for.

Antagonist – Del Beck (an alien in human form) is the sheriff that runs the town of Jefferson with an iron fist as he tries to accomplish the alien goal of conquering the human race through controlling the water supply.

Dramatic Question – How can Colt stop the aliens from taking over the planet?

Main Conflict – Centers around Jamaica. She is part alien and part human. Colt falls in love with her. Del Beck and the aliens want to take her out. Colt needs to keep her alive in order to expose the aliens. Does Jamaica have divided loyalties? Does Colt fully trust her?

Dilemma – Will Colt trust in others and risk having his heart broken again or remain as he is and risk the destruction of humanity?

Theme – Love leads to humanity’s ultimate salvation.

Character Arc – Colt is a disgruntled, jaded cop; a broken hearted loner, who learns to love again and trust in others in order to prevent an alien race from conquering the planet.

Nine Beat Structure
Opening – In a fog shrouded forest we see two combatants fighting over a fresh water spring in a fight to the death. We cut to Jamaica jumping up in bed, awakened by the nightmare.

Inciting incident – Colt in his boat fishing. His line gets tangled up with a corpse that morphs into a strange alien creature, then back to human form before his eyes.

By Page 10 Know What the Movie Is About – Corporate attempt to take over Jefferson water supply. Sheriff Del Beck doesn’t believe Colt about the body in the lake, threatens to charge him in the case if he doesn’t drop it.

Act 1 Turning Point – Judge about to rule on the water case is found dead. He is Jamaica’s husband. Jamaica asks Colt to investigate because she doesn’t trust Beck and the police. Colt agrees.

Midpoint – Colt about to kiss Jamaica. She morphs into an alien in his arms, then back to human form.

Act 2 Turning Point – Jamaica announces her plan to morph in public in order to reveal the alien presence here. Colt must keep the aliens from capturing her until then.

Crisis – Colt realizes he will have to sacrifice the woman he loves in order to stop the aliens.

Climax – Jamaica morphs on stage. One of the enraged mob kills her.

Resolution – Colt solves the riddle and causes all the aliens to morph in public. Humanity rises up to defeat them.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Deeper Layer

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Look at plot twists and character subtext to find the deeper layers.

Surface Layer: The people of a small mountain town fight to prevent a multinational corporation’s attempted takeover of it’s water supply
Deeper Layer: It is a front for an alien invasion of the earth. They need the water to accomplish their goal
Major Reveal: It gets revealed in a dramatic way when Jamaica allows the morph to go and reveal their presence to humanity.
Influences Surface Story: The aliens need the water to maintain their morph into human form. The bottling plant will send the water to aliens all over the Earth.
Hints: There are moments when some of the characters momentarily lose their morph.
Changes Reality: The small town’s fight becomes the humanity’s fight.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Character Structure

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… 4 Act structure and Character Journeys are closely aligned.

### Character Journey Maps for Sci-Fi Thriller Screenplay

#### Protagonist: Colt McBride

**Beginning:**
– **Where does the character start?**
– Colt McBride is a suspended cop, haunted by a past failure, and looking to escape his troubled big city life.

**Turning Point:**
– **A twist that locks them into a conflict.**
– Discovers a dead body that morphs into a reptilian creature, pushing him to investigate despite warnings from Sheriff Del Beck.

**Midpoint:**
– **A twist that causes everything to change.**
– Falls in love with Jamaica Daly, only to witness her morph into a reptilian form, revealing her alien nature.

**Turning Point:**
– **Another twist that takes them to the biggest conflict.**
– Learns the full extent of the alien invasion plan and the significance of the water supply. Jamaica decides to reveal her true identity at the 4th of July celebration.

**Dilemma:**
– **The character is faced with two equally unacceptable choices. They lose either way.**
– Colt must choose between helping Jamaica reveal the alien presence, risking her life, or keeping her safe and potentially dooming humanity.

**Major Conflict:**
– **The ultimate experience of this conflict.**
– Colt plans an ambush to save Jamaica and Evelyn from Beck, only to find out that Hal Burton, an ally, is the real leader of the aliens.

**Ending:**
– **Their world has changed.**
– Colt manages to expose the aliens, uniting humanity against the invasion. He leaves Jefferson with a renewed sense of purpose and a desire to face his past in the big city.

—

#### Antagonist: Del Beck

**Beginning:**
– **Where does the character start?**
– Sheriff Del Beck is the authoritative, charismatic, and ruthless leader of the alien contingent in Jefferson, hiding his true nature beneath a human facade.

**Turning Point:**
– **A twist that locks them into a conflict.**
– Colt’s discovery of the morphing body in the lake and his relentless pursuit of the truth threatens Beck’s control.

**Midpoint:**
– **A twist that causes everything to change.**
– Beck realizes that Colt’s investigation could expose the entire alien operation, increasing his efforts to eliminate Colt.

**Turning Point:**
– **Another twist that takes them to the biggest conflict.**
– Beck kidnaps Evelyn to force Jamaica to surrender, planning to kill them to protect the alien mission.

**Dilemma:**
– **The character is faced with two equally unacceptable choices. They lose either way.**
– Beck must decide between killing Jamaica to secure the alien mission or maintaining his human facade, risking exposure and rebellion from his own kind.

**Major Conflict:**
– **The ultimate experience of this conflict.**
– During the ambush, Beck is revealed as merely a front, with Hal Burton being the true leader. Beck’s loss of control signifies his ultimate defeat.

**Ending:**
– **Their world has changed.**
– Beck’s failure leads to the collapse of the alien plan, and his defeat represents the fall of the alien control in Jefferson, leaving him powerless and exposed.

—

#### Triangle Character: Jamaica Daly

**Beginning:**
– **Where does the character start?**
– Jamaica Daly is an ambitious, seductive member of the Jefferson Water Board, unaware of her alien heritage and conflicted about her identity.

**Turning Point:**
– **A twist that locks them into a conflict.**
– Her relationship with Colt and the revelation of her morphing into reptilian form forces her to confront her true nature.

**Midpoint:**
– **A twist that causes everything to change.**
– Learns from her mother Evelyn about her alien heritage and the significance of the water rituals, shifting her role from corporate player to potential savior.

**Turning Point:**
– **Another twist that takes them to the biggest conflict.**
– Decides to reveal her true identity and the alien presence at the 4th of July celebration, risking her life for the greater good.

**Dilemma:**
– **The character is faced with two equally unacceptable choices. They lose either way.**
– Jamaica must choose between exposing herself and potentially being killed, or hiding her identity, allowing the alien plan to proceed unchecked.

**Major Conflict:**
– **The ultimate experience of this conflict.**
– Jamaica is kidnapped by Beck, leading to a confrontation where her true identity is revealed in a dramatic public setting.

**Ending:**
– **Their world has changed.**
– Jamaica’s death catalyzes the exposure of the alien presence, uniting humanity against the invasion. Her sacrifice is a turning point in the battle for Earth.

—

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Supporting Characters

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned … Supporting Characters make the journey happen.

2. Tell us your supporting and background characters.
Supporting Characters: Daniel St. George, Saffron Rose, Evelyn Crenshaw, Hal Burton, Henry
Background Characters: Various locals, both humans and reptilians

Focusing on those supporting characters, fill in the basic profile for each.

Support 1:
Name: Daniel St. George
Role: New Age Alien investigator
Main purpose: Narrator. To help Colt unravel the alien mystery.
Value: Mentor role for Cole and Jamaica

Support 2:
Name: Saffron Rose
Role: Hydrologist
Main purpose: To explain the environmental / economic impact of the privatization of natural resources
Value: She helps to flesh out the corporate water story

Support 3:
Name: Evelyn Crenshaw
Role:Jamaica’s mother
Main purpose:To explain the alien plan.
Value: She knows the truth.

Support 4:
Name: Hal Burton
Role: Mayor of Jefferson
Main purpose: Power behind the throne. Deception.
Value: Trick expectancy. Provides the major reversal and reveal.

Support 5:
Name: Henry
Role: Local homeless person who has actually seen the aliens
Main purpose: Comic relief. To add a bit of crazy. Eventually kills Jamaica
Value: Adds a touch of authenticity to the story. Validates Colt’s experience

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Character Profiles, Part 2

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned … Character profiles help you become clear on whether your lead characters fit the story.

Character Name: Colt McBride (Protagonist)
A. The High Concept.
Colt McBride's investigation into a small town's mysteries leads him to a forbidden romance with a woman who's part alien, ultimately exposing a plot to conquer Earth using its own water.

B. This character’s journey.
From down and out suspended cop to confident, able to handle anything life throws his way, hero.
C. The Actor Attractors for this character.
Colt McBride is a quintessential hero battling not only corruption but an alien invasion, making him a unique blend of detective and sci-fi action hero. An actor would want to be known for playing such a multifaceted character who transitions from a big city cop to the savior of humanity, showcasing bravery, intelligence, and determination.

Role in the Story: Protagonist. Colt is not only investigating the water controversy but also seeking redemption for a past failure that led to his suspension. This covert goal drives him to push harder and take risks others might avoid.
Age range and Description: Late 20’s to mid 30’s, going on 50.. Colt is a rugged, weathered man with a fit build that speaks to his years as a big city cop.
Core Traits:Street Tough, Haunted, Broken Hearted, Angry
Motivation; Want/Need: Wants to be reinstated to the police force. Needs to open his heart again.
Wound: What they can’t face: Past Failure Leading to young person’s death.
Likability, Relatability, Empathy/Saves his K9 partner from Beck’s abuse/Screwed up at his job/His wife left him – for his best friend.
Character Subtext:
Colt hides his deep-seated guilt over his past failure, fearing it makes him unfit for his role as a protector.
Character Intrigue:
Colt's hidden agenda is to seek redemption for his past mistakes while uncovering the alien conspiracy.
Flaw:
His anger issues and impulsive actions often sabotage his efforts and alienate potential allies.
Values:
Colt believes in justice, protection of the innocent, and redemption.
Character Dilemma:
Colt struggles between his need for redemption (facing his past guilt) and his anger-driven desire for immediate justice (risking further mistakes).

Character Name: Del Beck (Antagonist)
A. The High Concept.
Colt McBride's investigation into a small town's mysteries leads him to a forbidden romance with a woman who's part alien, ultimately exposing a plot to conquer Earth using its own water.

B. This character’s journey.
Remains leader of the aliens until the bitter end.
C. The Actor Attractors for this character.
Del's unique blend of human charisma and alien malevolence makes him a standout antagonist. His ability to seamlessly navigate both worlds, maintaining power through fear and manipulation, adds a special layer to his character.

Role in the Story: Antagonist. Beck’s’s alien nature is his secret identity, which he skillfully conceals beneath his role as a powerful and respected sheriff.
Age range and Description: Late 30s to early 40s. Imposing figure with a commanding presence, his appearance radiates authority and control, masking the sinister intentions beneath his composed exterior.
Core Traits: Authoritative, Charismatic, Ruthless, Secretive
Motivation; Want/Need: Wants to conquer humanity so his race can take over the planet. Needs to shed his human skin, especially emotions.
Wound: What they can’t face: Loneliness and Betrayal of True Nature
Likability, Relatability, Empathy:Sophisticated and Charming/Power Struggle to Maintain Control/Hates his job. Counting down the days to “retirement.”
Character Subtext:
Beck hides his alien identity and true motives, manipulating others to maintain his facade.
Character Intrigue:
Beck’s hidden agenda is to orchestrate the alien invasion while preserving his authoritative human facade.
Flaw:
His ruthless nature and need for control often blind him to potential threats and alliances.
Values:
Beck values power, control, and the success of the alien mission.
Character Dilemma:
Beck is torn between his desire to maintain his human facade (enjoying the respect and control it brings) and his duty to the alien mission (risking exposure and isolation).

Character Name: Jamaica Daly
A. The High Concept.
Colt McBride's investigation into a small town's mysteries leads him to a forbidden romance with a woman who's part alien, ultimately exposing a plot to conquer Earth using its own water.

B. This character’s journey.
From Femme Fatale to Humanity’s savior.

C. The Actor Attractors for this character.
Jamaica’s unique position as the offspring of a human-alien union and her critical role in the renewal ritual set her apart. Her journey of self-discovery and the high stakes of her survival add a special and unique dimension to her character.

Role in the Story: Triangle Character. Jamaica’s secret identity is that of an unknowing alien hybrid, a role she has yet to fully understand or embrace. This hidden layer drives much of her internal conflict and decision-making.
Age range and Description: Mid to late 20’s. Jamaica is an attractive woman with a polished, professional look.
Core Traits: Ambitious, Seductive, Conflicted, Manipulative
Motivation; Want/Need: Wants to know the truth about her husband’s death. Needs to know the truth about herself.
Wound: What they can’t face: Fear of Discovering Her True Identity
Likability, Relatability, Empathy: Protect her mother/Identity Crisis/Shock and Revelation when she discovers her alien heritage.
Character Subtext:
Jamaica hides her fear of the war within and the internal conflict it causes, which affects her actions and decisions.
8. Character Intrigue:
Jamaica has always felt like a misfit, but doesn’t know why. When she finds out the truth, it brings clarity to her life and for the first time she knows what to do.
Flaw:
Her manipulative tendencies and fear of her true identity often lead her to make decisions that complicate her situation.
Values:
Jamaica values success, personal ambition, and, deep down, her family heritage and roots.
Character Dilemma:
Jamaica struggles between her ambition and corporate loyalty (pursuing success and control) and the need to accept her true identity and perform the alien renewal ritual (risking her carefully constructed life).

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari’s CharacterProfiles, Part 1

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned … Character profiles help you become clear on whether your lead characters fit the story.

Character Name: Colt McBride (Protagonist)
A. The High Concept.
Colt McBride's investigation into a small town's mysteries leads him to a forbidden romance with a woman who's part alien, ultimately exposing a plot to conquer Earth using its own water.

B. This character’s journey.
From down and out suspended cop to confident, able to handle anything life throws his way, hero.
C. The Actor Attractors for this character.
Colt McBride is a quintessential hero battling not only corruption but an alien invasion, making him a unique blend of detective and sci-fi action hero. An actor would want to be known for playing such a multifaceted character who transitions from a big city cop to the savior of humanity, showcasing bravery, intelligence, and determination.

Role in the Story: Protagonist. Colt is not only investigating the water controversy but also seeking redemption for a past failure that led to his suspension. This covert goal drives him to push harder and take risks others might avoid.
Age range and Description: Late 20’s to mid 30’s, going on 50.. Colt is a rugged, weathered man with a fit build that speaks to his years as a big city cop.
Core Traits:Street Tough, Haunted, Broken Hearted, Angry
Motivation; Want/Need: Wants to be reinstated to the police force. Needs to open his heart again.
Wound: What they can’t face: Past Failure Leading to young person’s death.
Likability / Relatability / Empathy/Saves his K9 partner from Beck’s abuse/Screwed up at his job/His wife left him – for his best friend.

Character Name: Del Beck (Antagonist)
A. The High Concept.
Colt McBride's investigation into a small town's mysteries leads him to a forbidden romance with a woman who's part alien, ultimately exposing a plot to conquer Earth using its own water.

B. This character’s journey.
Remains leader of the aliens until the bitter end.
C. The Actor Attractors for this character.
Del's unique blend of human charisma and alien malevolence makes him a standout antagonist. His ability to seamlessly navigate both worlds, maintaining power through fear and manipulation, adds a special layer to his character.

Role in the Story: Antagonist. Beck’s’s alien nature is his secret identity, which he skillfully conceals beneath his role as a powerful and respected sheriff.
Age range and Description: Late 30s to early 40s. Imposing figure with a commanding presence, his appearance radiates authority and control, masking the sinister intentions beneath his composed exterior.
Core Traits: Authoritative, Charismatic, Ruthless, Secretive
Motivation; Want/Need: Wants to conquer humanity so his race can take over the planet. Needs to shed his human skin, especially emotions.
Wound: What they can’t face: Loneliness and Betrayal of True Nature
Likability / Relatability / Empathy:Sophisticated and Charming/Power Struggle to Maintain Control/Hates his job. Counting down the days to “retirement.”

Character Name: Jamaica Daly
A. The High Concept.
Colt McBride's investigation into a small town's mysteries leads him to a forbidden romance with a woman who's part alien, ultimately exposing a plot to conquer Earth using its own water.

B. This character’s journey.
From Femme Fatale to Humanity’s savior.

C. The Actor Attractors for this character.
Jamaica’s unique position as the offspring of a human-alien union and her critical role in the renewal ritual set her apart. Her journey of self-discovery and the high stakes of her survival add a special and unique dimension to her character.

Role in the Story: Triangle Character. Jamaica’s secret identity is that of an unknowing alien hybrid, a role she has yet to fully understand or embrace. This hidden layer drives much of her internal conflict and decision-making.
Age range and Description: Mid to late 20’s. Jamaica is an attractive woman with a polished, professional look.
Core Traits: Ambitious, Seductive, Conflicted, Manipulative
Motivation; Want/Need: Wants to know the truth about her husband’s death. Needs to know the truth about herself.
Wound: What they can’t face: Fear of Discovering Her True Identity
Likability / Relatability / Empathy: Protect her mother/Identity Crisis/Shock and Revelation when she discovers her alien heritage.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Likability/Relatability/Empathy

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…Relatability and empathy are more important than likability.

Brainstorm one or more ways you can present your Protagonist through each of these:
Likability: Saves his K9 partner from Beck’s abuse
Relatability: screwed up at his job, his wife left him – for his best friend. The backstory comes out as Beck interrogates him at a traffic stop.
Empathy: Harassed and humiliated by Beck during the traffic stop as Beck shows him who’s boss.

Brainstorm one or more ways you can present your Triangle Character through each of these:
Likability: Jamaica could help a local business owner struggling due to the water controversy, showing her compassion and willingness to assist others despite her corporate ties.
Relatability: Identity Crisis: Jamaica’s struggle with her heritage and discovering her true identity is highly relatable, as many people experience questions about their origins and identity.
Empathy: Shock and Revelation: When she discovers her alien heritage, the shock and subsequent identity crisis make the audience feel for her confusion and fear.

Brainstorm one or more ways you can present your Antagonist through each of these:
Likability: Can be sophisticated and charming
Relatability: Power Struggle: Del’s desire to maintain control and protect his authority is a relatable experience for anyone who has been in a leadership position and fears losing power.
Empathy:Unspoken Wound: Del’s rare moments of vulnerability, perhaps when he reflects on the loneliness of his secret life or the human emotions he can’t fully embrace, can evoke empathy.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Character Intrigue

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Intrigue is what makes the story. It’s closely tied to subtext.

For each of your main characters, use this list to brainstorm one or more Intrigue items that might apply. Give us an idea of how that character’s subtext might show up in your movie.
• Character Name: Colt McBride
• Role: Protagonist
• Unspoken Wound: Disillusioned with the world and humanity
It takes falling in love with an alien to restore his faith in humanity again.

• Character Name: Del Beck
• Role: Antagonist
• Hidden agendas: An alien leading the take over of Earth
• Conspiracies: The Aliens have infiltrated every level of
human society and are behind all of Earth’s ills
• Deception: Wolf in sheep’s clothing. He (and all of the aliens)
have assumed human form to accomplish their goal. He hates having to take human form and being subject to the appetites (he loves fine wine) and frailties of this inferior race.

• Character Name: Jamaica Daly
• Role: Triangle Character
• Secrets: She is part alien, but she doesn’t know it. It’s been
kept a secret from her!
Jamaica has always felt like a misfit, but doesn’t know why. When she finds out the truth, it brings clarity to her life and for the first time she knows what to do.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Subtext Characters

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…Actors play the subtext!

With your example movie, give us the following answers for the character with the most subtext:
• Movie Title: Chinatown
• Character Name:Evelyn Mulwray
• Subtext Identity: A woman with a secret to hide and
someone to protect
• Subtext Trait: Secretive, concealing
• Subtext Logline: Evelyn tries to find out who killed her
husband while hiding a secret about her father and daughter/
sister.
• Possible Areas of Subtext: She wants Jake’s help but is
hiding the truth from him throughout. She has to live with the truth.

For your leads, brainstorm these answers:
### Protagonist: Colt McBride

**Subtext Identity:** Suspended Cop

**Subtext Trait:** Haunted by past failures

**Subtext Logline:** Colt is a suspended cop who is haunted by past failures, leading him to take covert actions in his investigation.

**Possible Areas of Subtext:**
– **Hiding something:** His past mistakes and the reason for his suspension.
– **Afraid to say:** His doubts about his own abilities and whether he can truly save the town.
– **Secret:** His true motivation for taking on the investigation might be personal redemption.
– **Lying:** Pretends confidence to gain the trust of the townspeople.
– **Plotting:** Develops secret plans to expose the aliens without alerting them.

### Antagonist: Del Beck

**Subtext Identity:** Alien Leader

**Subtext Trait:** Masking his true nature

**Subtext Logline:** Del Beck is an alien leader who masks his true nature, taking covert actions to maintain control and conceal his identity.

**Possible Areas of Subtext:**
– **Hiding something:** His alien identity and the invasion plans.
– **Afraid to say:** Any sign of vulnerability or dissent within his ranks.
– **Secret:** The full extent of the alien infiltration and their plans for humanity.
– **Lying:** Constantly deceives the townspeople to maintain his authority.
– **Plotting:** Orchestrates events to tighten his control and eliminate threats.

### Triangle Character: Jamaica Daly

**Subtext Identity:** Half-Human, Half-Alien

**Subtext Trait:** Unaware of her true nature

**Subtext Logline:** Jamaica Daly is a half-human, half-alien who is unaware of her true nature, leading her to take covert actions that align with her hidden instincts.

**Possible Areas of Subtext:**
– **Hiding something:** Her inner conflict and confusion about her identity.
– **Afraid to say:** Her growing doubts about the corporation and its motives.
– **Secret:** Her heritage and the renewal ritual she must perform.
– **Lying:** Keeps her true feelings and fears hidden from her husband and colleagues.
– **Withholding:** Information about her family’s past and its connection to the town.
– **Luring/seducing:** Unintentionally uses her charisma to sway others, driven by her alien instincts.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Actor Attractors
My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…Complex characters that jump off the page, unique to this story.

### Protagonist: Colt McBride

**1. Known for Role:**
Colt McBride is a quintessential hero battling not only corruption but an alien invasion, making him a unique blend of detective and sci-fi action hero. An actor would want to be known for playing such a multifaceted character who transitions from a big city cop to the savior of humanity, showcasing bravery, intelligence, and determination.

**2. Most Interesting Character:**
Colt is an outsider who uncovers layers of deceit in a seemingly simple water controversy, transforming it into a life-and-death struggle against an alien threat. His journey from skepticism to a relentless pursuit of truth makes him compelling.

**3. Interesting Actions:**
– Confronting Del Beck and challenging his authority.
– Investigating the water sources and discovering alien technology.
– Formulating and executing plans to expose and stop the aliens.
– Leading a group of townspeople in a desperate fight for survival.

**4. Introduction:**
Colt can be introduced during a tense standoff in the city, demonstrating his sharp instincts and courage. He receives a mysterious call about the water controversy, hinting at his initial reluctance and eventual compulsion to get involved due to his moral compass.

**5. Emotional Range:**
Colt experiences a wide emotional range: frustration with his suspension, curiosity about the conspiracy, horror at the alien revelation, determination to save the town, and compassion for the people he's protecting, especially as he forms close bonds with them.

**6. Subtext:**
Colt's struggle with his own sense of justice and duty, battling inner demons of past failures, and his gradual realization of the depth of the conspiracy. The subtext can also explore his feelings of isolation and the weight of being the town's last hope.

**7. Interesting Relationships:**
– His adversarial yet respectful relationship with Del Beck.
– A complex, possibly romantic tension with Jamaica Daly as he uncovers her true identity and struggles to protect her.
– A mentorship with a local deputy who looks up to him, despite Colt's suspension.

**8. Unique Voice:**
Colt's voice can be gruff yet compassionate, embodying a mix of seasoned cop wisdom and heartfelt concern for humanity. His dialogue should reflect his no-nonsense attitude, combined with moments of vulnerability.

**9. Special:**
Colt’s unique combination of big city detective skills and his capacity to adapt to extraordinary situations involving aliens makes him a rare and compelling hero. His journey from skepticism to belief, and his transformation from a suspended cop to humanity's savior, adds depth and uniqueness to his character.

### Antagonist: Del Beck

**1. Known for Role:**
Del Beck is a charismatic yet menacing antagonist with hidden layers, making him an attractive role for an actor who enjoys playing complex villains. His dual nature as a human sheriff and alien leader offers a rich tapestry to explore.

**2. Most Interesting Character:**
Del’s control over the town and his hidden alien identity create a powerful and mysterious figure. His manipulative nature and the facade he maintains make him one of the story's most intriguing characters.

**3. Interesting Actions:**
– Subtly manipulating town politics and people to maintain control.
– Engaging in intense confrontations with Colt, revealing his cunning.
– Performing alien rituals to maintain his power and control over the water.
– Ruthlessly silencing those who threaten to expose him.

**4. Introduction:**
Del can be introduced during a town meeting, effortlessly asserting his dominance and showcasing his charisma. A subtle hint of his alien nature, perhaps through an eerie, unexplained event, can foreshadow his true identity.

**5. Emotional Range:**
Del exhibits a cold, calculating demeanor but can shift to charm and intimidation seamlessly. His rare moments of vulnerability, when his alien identity is threatened, show a stark contrast to his usual control.

**6. Subtext:**
Del's internal conflict between his alien loyalty and the human emotions he may have developed. The subtext can also delve into his fear of exposure and loss of power, adding depth to his villainy.

**7. Interesting Relationships:**
– A cat-and-mouse dynamic with Colt, blending respect and animosity.
– A manipulative relationship with Jamaica, where he uses her without revealing her true identity.
– Tension with his alien subordinates, who may question his methods or loyalty.

**8. Unique Voice:**
Del's voice should be smooth, authoritative, and occasionally menacing, reflecting his control and hidden malice. His dialogue should balance between his public charm and private ruthlessness.

**9. Special:**
Del's unique blend of human charisma and alien malevolence makes him a standout antagonist. His ability to seamlessly navigate both worlds, maintaining power through fear and manipulation, adds a special layer to his character.

### Triangle Character: Jamaica Daly

**1. Known for Role:**
Jamaica Daly is a conflicted character caught between her corporate ambitions and her mysterious heritage. An actor would be drawn to her complex journey of self-discovery and the dramatic stakes involved.

**2. Most Interesting Character:**
Jamaica’s internal conflict between her human and alien sides, coupled with her high-stakes mission to perform the renewal ritual, makes her a compelling figure. Her evolution from ignorance to awareness is a fascinating arc.

**3. Interesting Actions:**
– Unwittingly aiding the corporation while struggling with her family legacy.
– Discovering her true nature and grappling with the implications.
– Performing the renewal ritual in a dramatic, high-stakes scene.
– Choosing sides in the final confrontation, potentially betraying her corporate allies.

**4. Introduction:**
Jamaica can be introduced in a corporate setting, displaying her competence and ambition. A personal moment, such as visiting her family's old estate or a cryptic encounter with Del Beck, can hint at her deeper connection to the town.

**5. Emotional Range:**
Jamaica’s range spans ambition, confusion, fear, and ultimately, empowerment. Her emotional journey involves denial, acceptance, and the strength to face her true identity and heritage.

**6. Subtext:**
Jamaica’s struggle with her dual identity and her desire to forge her own path despite her alien heritage. The subtext can explore her conflicted loyalties and the fear of losing herself in the process.

**7. Interesting Relationships:**
– A complicated, possibly romantic tension with Colt as they uncover the truth together.
– A manipulative, yet revealing relationship with Del Beck.
– Strained interactions with her husband, the judge, as her secrets come to light.

**8. Unique Voice:**
Jamaica’s voice should reflect her professional confidence, tinged with moments of vulnerability and inner conflict. Her dialogue should evolve as she transitions from corporate spokesperson to someone grappling with a profound personal revelation.

**9. Special:**
Jamaica’s unique position as the offspring of a human-alien union and her critical role in the renewal ritual set her apart. Her journey of self-discovery and the high stakes of her survival add a special and unique dimension to her character.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Subject Line: Hari’s Actor attractors for Chinatown.

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… It’s important to have multi- dimensional, complex characters.

Movie Title: Chinatown
Lead Character Name: Jake Gittes
Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role? Lead character in one of the most highly regarded movies and scripts of all time.
What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the movie? Rakish rogue who is ethically and morally compromised in his choice of profession, but still has a code of conduct to live by.
3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead takes in the movie? He unravels a complicated mystery while trying to outwit the bureaucracy.
4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor? Charm, sleaze, code of conduct all on display in opening scene with Curly.
5. What is this character’s emotional range? Suave to cynical to anger/rage to sadness to heroism.
6. What subtext can the actor play? Brooding rage at the bureaucracy and the futility of good intentions.
7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has? Evelyn Mulwray. She goes from antagonist to client to love interest to neurotic heroine.
8. How is this character’s unique voice presented? Usually in the way he interacts with people. When on the case he is cool and inventive. When dealing with opposition his anger and rage come through.
'9. What makes this character special and unique? His 1000 watt smile and suave nature. He has all the answers except how to protect the ones he loves, and he knows it.
10. (Fill in a scene that shows the character fulfilling much of the Actor Attractor model.) The climactic scene in Chinatown. His good intentions come crashing down around him and the bureaucracy wins out.

Lead Character Name: Evelyn Mulwray
1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role? An incredibly complex character, with seemingly never ending layers of mystery and dysfunction in one of the most highly regarded movies and scripts of all time.
2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the movie? A neurotic heroine trying to keep Pandora’s Box locked. See answer to number 1 above.
3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead takes in the movie? Trying to keep her daughter/sister away from Noah Cross and hide her identity from everyone else.
4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor? Cool and collected as she confronts Gittes, with a great line to close the scene,”I don’t get tough with anybody, my lawyer does.”
5. What is this character’s emotional range? Neurotic, not in control of her life to fragile heroine trying to protect her daughter/sister.
6. What subtext can the actor play? Constantly having to juggle elements of her life that are beyond her control.
7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has? With Jake, threatening to sue him, then hiring him to investigate her husband’s death. He becomes her lover, and eventually, a hero trying to save her.
With her daughter/sister from the incestuous relationship with her father.
With her father, Noah Cross, trying to keep her daughter/sister away from him.
8. How is this character’s unique voice presented? In her cool outward demeanor and some great lines, all betrayed by the pain underneath the facade.
9. What makes this character special and unique? The relationship with her father and daughter/sister.
10. (Fill in a scene that shows the character fulfilling much of the Actor Attractor model.) The scene where she reveals the truth to Gittes while he slaps her around. All her neuroses, pain and layers of dysfunction come out. Along with her heroic nature.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Genre Conventions

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Using Genre Conventions tightens up the script and keeps it on point

Act 1:
Opening: As Colt McBride drives into Jefferson, the visuals emphasize the stark contrast between the bustling, technologically advanced big city he's leaving behind and the quiet, seemingly idyllic small town of Jefferson. Advanced alien technology subtly integrated into everyday life hints at the fantastic world hidden beneath the surface.

Inciting Incident: When Colt discovers the morphing body in the lake, the scene is crafted to evoke a sense of wonder and dread. The creature's transformation is accompanied by eerie visual and sound effects, emphasizing the otherworldly nature of the threat Colt has stumbled upon.

Turning Point: Sheriff Del Beck's confrontation with Colt crackles with tension and foreshadows the life-and-death stakes to come. Beck's ironclad control of Jefferson is depicted through subtle visual cues, such as surveillance cameras and alien technology hidden in plain sight.

Act 2:
New Plan: Colt's partnership with Mayor Hal Burton and his team underscores the social commentary aspect of the story. Burton's desire to challenge Beck's authority reflects the town's simmering discontent and sets the stage for the power struggle to come.

Plan in Action: As Colt delves deeper into the conspiracy, the mystery, intrigue, and suspense intensify. The water company's unscrupulous dealings are revealed through a series of tense confrontations and narrow escapes, keeping the audience on the edge of their seats.

Midpoint Turning Point: Colt's burgeoning romance with Jamaica Daly takes on added significance as he grapples with the revelation of her alien heritage. The scene where she morphs into reptilian form is a visually stunning and emotionally charged turning point, heightening the suspense and deepening Colt's personal stakes in the conflict.

Act 3:
Rethink Everything: The revelation of Jamaica's true identity adds a new layer of complexity to the story, allowing for deeper exploration of themes such as identity, belonging, and betrayal. Evelyn's decision to reveal the aliens' sinister plans sets the stage for the climactic showdown.

New Plan: As the tension mounts, Colt and Jamaica devise a daring plan to expose the alien presence at the 4th of July celebration. Their race against time to thwart Beck's machinations and keep Jamaica safe drives the narrative towards its explosive climax.

Turning Point: Beck's betrayal and Hal Burton's true nature as the alien in charge deliver a gut-wrenching twist that raises the stakes to their highest point yet. Colt's desperate struggle to save Jamaica and stop the alien invasion propels the story towards its thrilling conclusion.

Act 4:
Climax: The climactic showdown at the 4th of July celebration is a visual and emotional tour de force, with Colt's heroic sacrifice and Jamaica's shocking transformation leading to a heart-stopping moment of reckoning. Colt's final confrontation with Hal Burton is a pulse-pounding battle of wills that culminates in a breathtaking revelation that changes everything.

Resolution: As humanity unites to defeat the alien threat, Colt's journey comes full circle as he faces the unknown future with newfound courage and resolve. The final scene, as he and Jake ride off into the sunset, hints at new adventures yet to come in the fantastic world of "Morph."

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Subject line: Hari’s 4 Act Transformational Structure

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…This seems like it will make the actual writng much faster. It helps to have good roadmap.

Concept: A suspended cop discovers that a multinational corporation’s attempted takeover of a small town’s water supply is really a front for an alien invasion of the Earth.

Main Conflict: Colt McBride tries to reveal the aliens presence and stop their takeover of the Earth. Del Beck is the alien in charge of the takeover.

Colt’s Old Ways:
Cynical
World weary
Doesn’t trust anyone.
Loner, just wants to be left alone.
Won’t go out of his way to help others.
Afraid of being hurt
Only sees things from his wounded perspective

Colt’s New Ways:
Puts himself on the line for others
Willing to love again.
Renewed sense of energy and purpose
Can handle loss
Sees the bigger picture

Act 1:
Opening: Colt McBride on the freeway, driving into Jefferson. Wants to get away from the disaster of his big city life. In the back of the car, his new K9 partner, Jake. McBride is not a fan.
Sherrif Del Beck stops him for a minor traffic violation. Their interaction reveals McBride’s past and Beck’s iron clad control of Jefferson

Inciting Incident: McBride is hungover, fishing at a lake. He discovers a dead body in the water. As he’s pulling it out of the water, it suddenly morphs into a strange reptilian creature, then back into human form. WTF?

Turning Point: McBride won’t let it go, pushes Beck to investigate. Beck wants him out of there. Gives him 24 hours to leave town or he will charge him with the murder of the body in the lake. McBride digs in.

Act 2:
New plan – Realizing that he needs help, McBride teams up with some of the locals.

Plan in action – Mayor Hal Burton becomes his staunchest ally. He sees McBride as someone who can finally help him challenge Beck’s vice like grip on Jefferson.
McBride works with an alien investigator, but also starts to look into the unscrupulous dealings of the water company. He meets Jamaica Daly who sits on the Jefferson Water Board. She arouses his suspicions – and his interest. Femme fatale.
He becomes friendly with Evelyn, Jamaica’s mother

Midpoint Turning Point – Against his better judgement, McBride falls in love with Jamaica. On an excursion, they embrace, about to kiss, when she suddenly morphs into reptilian form, then back into her human form.

Act 3:
Rethink everything – Jamaica is unaware that she is the offspring of interspecies breeding. Evelyn has kept it from her because Beck threatened to kill Jamaica if she ever revealed it.
McBride gets Evelyn to tell them everything. The aliens need to perform a ritual with the water from Jefferson to maintain their human morph when they are 28 years old. The water company is really shipping the water to aliens all over the world for this purpose.

New plan – Jamaica decides to let the morph go and reveal herself and the alien presence at the big 4th of July celebration in Jefferson. McBride is heart broken, but agrees it is the best plan. Now they just have to keep her safe until then.

Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift – The aliens find out Jamaica’s plan and Beck kidnaps Evelyn, threatens to kill her unless Jamaica turns herself in. Jamaica agrees, but McBride has enlisted the help of Hal Burton and they plan to ambush Beck at the meeting…
Except that Hal Burton is really the Alien in charge. Beck was just a front. Hal shoots Evelyn. Jamaica is next.

Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Jake attacks Burton and they manage to escape. McBride gets Jamaica to the stage just in time where she morphs into Reptilian form in front of everyone. People are freaked. A crazed person in the crowd shoots Jamaica.

Resolution – As she lies dying, McBride figures out a way to get all aliens to instantly lose their morph and reveal their presence.
Humanity unites and defeats the aliens.
McBride and Jake ride off, back to the big city to face whatever lies in store for them.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Subtext Plot

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Try not to go off the deep end with too much subtext.

Concept: In a town where aliens use water as a conduit for assimilation, a suspended cop's investigation reveals a sinister ritual that could alter the fate of humanity forever.

1. Scheme and Investigation
Description: Colt McBride is investigating the mysterious occurrences in the town, while Sheriff Del Beck is actively scheming to cover up the alien assimilation ritual.
Subtext Plot: Beck plants false evidence to mislead Colt, uses informants to keep tabs on him, and sets up decoys to waste his time. Meanwhile, Colt uncovers inconsistencies in witness testimonies, finds secret documents, and follows a trail of clues leading him closer to the truth. Each action taken by Beck to derail Colt only serves to deepen Colt's resolve and sharpen his investigative skills.

3. Someone Hides Who They Are
Description: Jamaica Daly hides her true half-alien identity, initially unaware of it herself.
Subtext Plot: Jamaica experiences strange symptoms and unexplained phenomena that she hides from everyone, including herself, attributing them to stress or illness. Clues about her true nature emerge through Colt’s investigation and Evelyn’s guarded behavior. Eventually, Jamaica’s alien heritage is discovered, leading to personal and societal repercussions, including a crisis of identity and loyalty.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari's Transformational Journey

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…The inner story is just as important as the outer one.

Protagonist: Colt McBride
Arc Beginning: Suspended cop. Running away from it all.
Arc Ending: Has defeated the aliens and saved the planet.
Internal Journey: Bitter. Anger issues. Lost faith in humanity, especially women. Not open to love for fear of getting hurt again.
External Journey: From down and out suspended cop to confident, able to handle anything life throws his way, hero.

Old Ways:
Doesn’t trust anyone.
Loner, just wants to be left alone.
Won’t go out of his way to help others.
Afraid of being hurt
Only sees things from his wounded perspective

New Ways:
Puts himself on the line for others
Willing to love again.
Renewed sense of energy and cause
Can handle loss
Sees the bigger picture

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  hari messer.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Intentional Lead Characters

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…I want to change my character structure to Dramatic Triangle!

Protagonist: Colt McBride
Logline: A big city cop who is drawn into a water controversy between a multinational corporation and a small mountain town only to find that a hostile alien race has morphed into human form and is behind it.
Unique: Even though he is on suspension from his own police force, as an outsider, he is the only one willing to challenge Del Beck’s authority.

Antagonist: Del Beck
Logline The corrupt sheriff who rules Jefferson County with an iron fist..
Unique: He is the leader of the alien invasion force and is also Jamaica’s Godfather.

Triangle Character: Jamaica Daly
Logline: Jamaica Daly comes from one of the county’s oldest families. She is a successful real estate agent in the town, known for her charm, persuasive skills, and deep knowledge of the local area. She specializes in high-end properties, which often involve properties near water sources and other key locations.
Unique: Jamaica is married to the judge hearing the case. She doesn’t realize that she is the offspring of a human- alien marriage and must perform a renewal ritual involving the water or she will die.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Title, Concept and Character Structure

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

I learned… that when you break it up into bite size pieces, writing a screenplay does not seem so daunting a task.

Title: Morph

Concept: In a town where aliens use water as a conduit for assimilation, a suspended cop’s investigation reveals a sinister ritual that could alter the fate of humanity forever.

Character Structure: Dramatic Triangle

[hari messer]

Is anyone else having trouble accessing this lesson? It tells me I have to complete the previous lesson first, which I have already done. Any suggestions?

[hari messer]

Subject Line: Hari’s Likability/Relatability/Empathy

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…Relatability and empathy are just as important as likability

Brainstorm one or more ways you can present your Protagonist through each of these:

Likability: Saves his K9 partner from Beck’s abuse

Relatability: screwed up at his job, his wife left him – for his best friend. The backstory comes out as Beck interrogates him at a traffic stop.

Empathy: Harassed and humiliated by Beck during the traffic stop as Beck shows him who’s boss. Beck tasers him.

[hari messer]

Subject line: Hari’s Character Intrigue

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Intrigue is what makes the story. It’s closely tied to subtext.

For each of your main characters, use this list to brainstorm one or more Intrigue items that might apply. Give us an idea of how that character’s subtext might show up in your movie.

Character Name: Colt McBride

Role: Protagonist

Unspoken Wound: Disillusioned with the world and humanity

Subtext: It takes falling in love with an alien to restore his faith in humanity.

Character Name: Del Beck

Role: Antagonist

Hidden agendas: An alien leading the take over of Earth

Conspiracies: The Aliens have infiltrated every level of human society and are behind all of Earth’s ills.

Deception: Wolf in sheep’s clothing. He (and all of the aliens) have assumed human form to accomplish their goal.

Subtext: He hates having to take human form and being subject to the appetites (he loves fine wine!) and frailties of this inferior race.

Character Name: Jamaica Daly

Role: Triangle Character

Secrets: She is part alien, but she doesn’t know it. It’s been kept a secret from her!

Subtext: Jamaica has always felt like a misfit, but doesn’t know why. When she finds out the truth it brings clarity to her life and for the first time she knows what to do.

[hari messer]

Subject Line: Hari’s Subtext Characters

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…Actors play the subtext!

With your example movie, give us the following answers for the character with the most subtext:

Movie Title: Chinatown

Character Name:Evelyn Mulwray

Subtext Identity: A woman with a secret to hide and

someone to protect

Subtext Trait: Secretive, concealing

Subtext Logline: Evelyn tries to find out who killed her

husband while hiding a secret about her father and daughter/

sister.

Possible Areas of Subtext: She wants Jake’s help but is

hiding the truth from him throughout. She has to live with the truth.

For your two leads, brainstorm these answers:

Character Name: Colt McBride

Subtext Identity: A disillusioned cop who believes the system and humanity

are corrupt beyond repair.

Subtext Trait: he copes by drinking and violent outbursts.

Subtext Logline: A cop who has been crushed by the system

can’t help but try and save humanity in the end.

Possible Areas of Subtext: Dealings with Beck, relationship with Jamaica and the truth.

Character Name: Del Beck

Subtext Identity: An alien forced to live among humanity as

one one of them while attempting to take over the planet.

Subtext Trait: Deceitful, manipulative, evil

Subtext Logline: Beck is in charge of the Alien Invasion and

must stay true to the plan, even though his disdain for the

inferior human race would have him crush them right now.

Possible Areas of Subtext: Dealings with anyone who might

get in the way and prolong his suffering.

[hari messer]

Is this the right place to post?

Subject Line: Hari’s Actor attractors for Chinatown.

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… It’s important to have multi- dimensional, complex characters.

Movie Title: Chinatown

Lead Character Name: Jake Gittes

1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role? Lead character in a great film noir role. Jake can be suave and charming, or in your face and angry. Very inventive in his work. Whatever it takes to get the job done. Narrative and character expertly woven together.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the movie? Rakish rogue who is ethically and morally compromised in his choice of profession, but still has a code of conduct to live by.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead takes in the movie? He unravels a complicated mystery while trying to outwit the bureaucracy. Also the relationship with Evelyn.

4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor? Charm, sleaze, code of conduct all on display in opening scene with Curly.

5. What is this character’s emotional range? Suave to cynical to anger/rage to sadness to heroism.

6. What subtext can the actor play? Brooding rage at the bureaucracy and the futility of good intentions.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has? Evelyn Mulwray. She goes from antagonist to client to love interest to neurotic heroine.

8. How is this character’s unique voice presented? Usually in the way he interacts with people. When on the case he is cool and inventive. When dealing with opposition his anger and rage come through.

9. What makes this character special and unique? His 1000 watt smile and suave nature. He has all the answers except how to protect the ones he loves, and he knows it.

10. (Fill in a scene that shows the character fulfilling much of the Actor Attractor model.) The climactic scene in Chinatown. His good intentions come crashing down around him and the bureaucracy wins out.

Lead Character Name: Evelyn Mulwray

1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role? An incredibly complex character, with seemingly never ending layers of mystery and dysfunction.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the movie? A neurotic heroine trying to keep Pandora’s Box locked. See answer to number 1 above.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead takes in the movie? Trying to keep her daughter/sister away from Noah Cross and hide her identity from everyone else.

4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor? Cool and collected as she confronts Gittes, with a great line to close the scene,”I don’t get tough with anybody, my lawyer does.”

5. What is this character’s emotional range? Neurotic, not in control of her life to fragile heroine trying to protect her daughter/ sister.

6. What subtext can the actor play? Constantly having to juggle elements of her life that are beyond her control.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has? With Jake, threatening to sue him, then hiring him to investigate her husband’s death. He becomes her lover, and eventually, a hero trying to save her.

With her daughter/sister from the incestuous relationship with her father.

With her father, Noah Cross, trying to keep her daughter/sister away from him.

8. How is this character’s unique voice presented? In her cool outward demeanor and some great lines, all betrayed by the pain underneath the facade.

9. What makes this character special and unique? The relationship with her father and daughter/sister.

10. (Fill in a scene that shows the character fulfilling much of the Actor Attractor model.) The scene where she reveals the truth to Gittes while he slaps her around. All her neuroses, pain and layers of dysfunction come out. Along with her heroic nature.

[hari messer]

Subject line: Hari’s Genre Conventions

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Knowing the genre conventions helps to build in suspense.

CONVENTIONS OF THRILLERS

PURPOSE: To thrill your audience with high stakes, plot twists, and suspense that never lets up until the adrenalin packed climax.

LIFE AND DEATH SITUATIONS. They face danger at every step — either physically, emotionally, or mentally. The hero needs to either be in danger or there is the implication of future danger.

MYSTERY/INTRIGUE/SUSPENSE: There’s a mystery that must be solved in order to survive. Intrigue is the underhanded and covert Villain’s plan. Suspense comes from the danger the Hero faces.

HERO: Unknowing, unwitting, but resourceful hero

VILLAIN: Dangerous, devious, and unrelenting. Committed to destroy anyone who gets in their way.

MAIN EMOTIONS: Suspense, intrigue, mystery, tension, anticipation, uncertainty, and surprise.

Genre conventions in italics.

Act 1:

<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Opening:
<ul style=””>

[hari messer]

Subject line: Hari’s 4 Act Transformational Structure

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…This seems like it will make the actual wring much faster. It helps to have good roadmap.

Concept: A suspended cop discovers that a multinational corporation’s attempted takeover of a small town’s water supply is really a front for an alien invasion of the Earth.

Main Conflict: Colt McBride tries to reveal the aliens presence and stop their takeover of the Earth. Del Beck is the alien in charge of the takeover.

Colt’s Old Ways:

Cynical

World weary

Doesn’t trust anyone.

Loner, just wants to be left alone.

Won’t go out of his way to help others.

Afraid of being hurt

Only sees things from his wounded perspective

Colt’s New Ways:

Puts himself on the line for others

Willing to love again.

Renewed sense of energy and purpose

Can handle loss

Sees the bigger picture

Act 1:

Opening: Colt McBride on the freeway, driving into Jefferson. Wants to get away from the disaster of his big city life. In the back of the car, his new K9 partner, Jake. McBride is not a fan.

Sherrif Del Beck stops him for a minor traffic violation. Their interaction reveals McBride’s past and Beck’s iron clad control of Jefferson

Inciting Incident: McBride is hungover, fishing at a lake. He discovers a dead body in the water. As he’s pulling it out of the water, it suddenly morphs into a strange reptilian creature, then back into human form. WTF?

Turning Point: McBride won’t let it go, pushes Beck to investigate. Beck wants him out of there. Gives him 24 hours to leave town or he will charge him with the murder of the body in the lake. McBride digs in.

Act 2:

New plan – Realizing that he needs help, McBride teams up

with some of the locals.

Plan in action – Mayor Hal Burton becomes his staunchest ally. He sees McBride as someone who can finally help him challenge Beck’s vice like grip on Jefferson.

McBride works with an alien investigator, but also starts to look into the unscrupulous dealings of the water company. He meets Jamaica Daly who sits on the Jefferson Water Board. She arouses his suspicions – and his interest. Femme fatale.

He becomes friendly with Evelyn, Jamaica’s mother

Midpoint Turning Point – Against his better judgement, McBride falls in love with Jamaica. On an excursion, they embrace, about to kiss, when she suddenly morphs into reptilian form, then back into her human form.

Act 3:

Rethink everything – Jamaica is unaware that she is the offspring of interspecies breeding. Evelyn has kept it from her because Beck threatened to kill Jamaica if she ever revealed it.

McBride gets Evelyn to tell them everything. The aliens need to perform a ritual with the water from Jefferson to maintain their human morph when they are 28 years old. The water company is really shipping the water to aliens all over the world for this purpose.

New plan – Jamaica decides to let the morph go and reveal herself and the alien presence at the big 4th of July celebration in Jefferson. McBride is heart broken, but agrees it is the best plan. Now they just have to keep her safe until then.

Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift – The aliens find out Jamaica’s plan and Beck kidnaps Evelyn, threatens to kill her unless Jamaica turns herself in. Jamaica agrees, but McBride has enlisted the help of Hal Burton and they plan to ambush Beck at the meeting…

Except that Hal Burton is really the Alien in charge. Beck was just a front. Hal shoots Evelyn. Jamaica is next.

Act 4:

Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Jake attacks Burton and they manage to escape. McBride gets Jamaica to the stage just in time where she morphs into Reptilian form in front of everyone. People are freaked. A crazed person in the crowd shoots Jamaica.

Resolution – As she lies dying, McBride figures out a way to get all aliens to instantly lose their morph and reveal their presence.

Humanity unites and defeats the aliens.

McBride and Jake ride off, back to the big city to face whatever lies in store for them.

[hari messer]

Hari’s subtext plot

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned… Try not to go off the deep end with too much subtext.

Concept: A suspended cop discovers that a multinational corporation’s attempted takeover of a small town’s water supply is really a front for an alien invasion of the Earth

Scheme and Investigation – Colt McBride investigates why the water company will go to such extremes to take over Jefferson’s water supply. Could aliens really be involved? The aliens are scheming to take over the Earth.

Someone Hides Who They Are – An alien species interbreeds with humans in order to conceal their presence as they attempt to conquer the Earth.

[hari messer]

The Transformational Journey

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…The inner story is just as important as the outer one.

Colt McBride

Arc Beginning: Suspended cop. Running away from it all.

Arc Ending: Has defeated the aliens and saved the planet.

Internal Journey: Bitter. Anger issues. Lost faith in humanity, especially women. Not open to love for fear of getting hurt again.

External Journey: From down and out suspended cop to confident, able to handle anything life throws his way, hero.

Old Ways:

Doesn’t trust anyone.

Loner, just wants to be left alone.

Won’t go out of his way to help others.

Afraid of being hurt

Only sees things from his wounded perspective

New Ways:

Puts himself on the line for others

Willing to love again.

Renewed sense of energy and cause

Can handle loss

Sees the bigger picture

[hari messer]

Hari’s Intentional Lead Characters

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…I want to change my character structure to Dramatic Triangle!

Protagonist: Colt McBride

Logline: A big city cop who is drawn into a water controversy between a multinational corporation and a small mountain town only to find that a hostile alien race has morphed into human form and is behind it.

Unique: Even though he is on suspension from his own police force, as an outsider, he is the only one willing to challenge Del Beck’s authority.

Antagonist: Del Beck

Logline The corrupt sheriff who rules Jefferson County with an iron fist.

Unique: He is the leader of the alien invasion force and is also Jamaica’s Godfather.

<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Triangle Character: Jamaica Daly

Logline: Works for the multinational corporation trying to take Jefferson’s water, even though she comes from one of the county’s oldest families.

Unique: Jamaica is married to the judge hearing the case. She doesn’t realize that she is the offspring of a human-alien marriage and must perform a renewal ritual involving the water or she will die.

[hari messer]

Hari’s Title, Concept and Character Structure.

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

What I learned…Originally I thought the antagonist would be the Alien race, but now I wonder if I should zero in on one of them as the antagonist of the story.

Title: Water, Inc.

Concept: A suspended cop discovers that a multinational corporation’s attempted takeover of a small town’s water supply is actually a front for an alien invasion of the Earth.

Character Structure: Protagonist vs Antagonist

[hari messer]

I learned that I need to step outside my comfort zone so often that it eventually feels natural to do so. Also that it is done by taking small risks daily that add up to life changing events.

[hari messer]

Hi! My name is Hari Messer. I have written 2 scripts. I have taken Pro Series, Fresh and Edgy, Profound, 30 day screenplay and Thriller classes. I hope to gain the skills and confidence to finish scripts in a timely manner and work with professionals in the industry to bring Profound screenplays to market. Something unique?… I’ve climbed a 14000 ft mountain.

[hari messer]

1. Hari Messer

2. “I agree to the terms of this release form.”

GROUP RELEASE FORM

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

This completes the Group Release Form for the class.