Joaquin Gray
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Act 1 First Draft Part 1
My vision is that I am an A plus screenwriter who scripts are produced into profitable films that I benefit financially from.
I learned that several ideals come to you that aren’t in the outline but fit what you are writing in the scene.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” High Speed Writing Rules
My vision is that I am an A plus screenplay writer, who’s script get produced into highly profitable films which I receive a large financial benefit from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is keep writing when you drift off, re focus and keep typing through. Editing comes later.
I found myself drifting into la la land a few times but easily came back to writing because I keep telling myself to keep pushing.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” First Scene
My vision is that I will be an A plus screen writer who writes screenplays that are produced into profitable films which I will cash large checks from.
<font face=”inherit”>I learned how an outline is applied to a script, when you don’t </font>deviate from<font face=”inherit”> it. </font>
<font face=”inherit”>Because I was rusty writing, I found myself becoming distracted a few times. The process was simple, stating action with not much, if any </font>description at all. Doing the outline was clutch because it was plug in play as I wrote.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Anyone available to give me feedback?
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Fascinating Scene Outlines!
My vision is that I am an A plus screenplay writer, who’s scripts are produced into extremely profitable movies which I cash large checks from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is layers upon layers make screenplays better.
1. EXT. OPEN PLAIN – DAY
BREWFORD and his family, ride a two-horse wagon across an open plain in 1863.
Scene Arch: Brewford drives a wagon across a dirt road. Everyone notices a Native American in the distance on a horse.
Essence: The family is migrating to a new land.
Conflict: They are harassed by three men on horses demanding freedom papers.
Subtext: Brewford is calm, witty and sees a potential treat.
Hope/fear: We hope they migrate safely.
Beginning (suspense) three men on horses’ haul ass on a dirt road approaching Brewford and his family from the rear.
Middle (Superior position) Brewford makes the men aware of a Native American sitting on a horse in the horizon. Out pops another on foot.
Ending (Character changes radically) The men on horses believe they might be outnumbered and ride away.
2. EXT. HOUSE – DAY
The family arrives at the new house. They deal with two strange men on their property.
Scene Arch: Brewford pulls up to a farm. Men ride away slightly upset pointing at Brewford Jr.
Essence: Happiness, joy.
Conflict: The men ride up on horses, BJ aims a shotgun at them. One of the men pull his pistol.
Subtext: Brewford is gentle, patience with his son’s actions, in control.
Hope/fear: We hope the men don’t shoot each other.
Beginning (More interesting setting) Brewford and family discover a fully furnished home. Brewford finds a workshop. Brewford Jr. discovers a chest of guns.
Middle (Major twist) Brewfords daughter runs out the house, happy, only to see two strange men on horseback approaching the house (Misinterpretation) Brewford Jr. emerges from behind the house then aims a rifle at the men.
End (uncomfortable moment) Brewford sees his son aiming a rifle and the men aiming at his son and daughter.
3. INT. CLYDES SPOT – DAY
A man stands near the bar, smoking and drinking. Three people approach him whispering in his ear.
Scene Arch: Clyde stands at the bar to playing a piano looking out of the window.
Essence: Clyde as a bad mother sucka. People fear him.
Conflict: What happens when you interrupt Clyde playing the piano?
Subtext: Clyde is displacing his pain.
Hope/fear: We hope no one will ever cross Clyde.
Beginning (Mystery) A man sits in the corner of the room slumped over in a chair bleeding form his head. A woman looks his direction nervous, slight panic attack.
Middle (Intrigue) A man approaches Clyde at the bar then whispers in his ear. A second man is seen in the other corner of the room. A rope hangs from the ceiling, his hands are tied above his head, as he bleeds. Another man approaches Clyde, whispering in his ear. A child struggling to get away is being held by a man.
Ending (Cliffhanger) Clyde walks to a piano then sits. He plays two notes followed by two shoots. The two men fall. Clyde begins his recital.
4. EXT. ridding into TOWN – DAY
Brewford and son ride into town then stop at the general store.
Scene Arch: Brewford and BJ slowly ride their horses into town then stop at the store.
Essence: Brewford gathering supplies for the house with his son.
Conflict: The townspeople eyeballing Brewford and BJ.
Subtext: Brewford being aware of his surroundings.
Hope/fear: We fear the looks by the towns people.
Beginning (More interesting setting) What a town? Blacks and Whites walk together hand and hand. Black children play in the streets. Whites and Blacks on horses. A black sheriff stands in front of the jail.
Middle (suspense) if looks could kill, as the towns people stare.
End (intrigue) The sheriff motions to some children. One makes their way to the store.
5. INT. CLYDES SPOT – DAY
Clyde plays the piano. Some members in the room appear frighten.
Scene Arch: Clyde views Brewford and BJ ride into town. Clyde tells his men to go bring him the young boy, Brewford Jr.
Essence: The soothing hypnotic sound of the piano.
Conflict: Clyde’s men beat someone up who disrupted the piano session.
Subtext: Clyde’s musical keystrokes make his men become more aggressive.
Hope/fear: We hope no one else interrupts Clyde’s playing.
Beginning (Suspense) The spectators are speechless and motionless, as Clyde plays the piano, and the dead men are dragged out of the room.
Middle (Uncomfortable moment) The women now alone, is approached by Clydes men, as they grope her.
End (Major twist) Clyde’s men exit the room from his musical tone and head gesture. They exit the spot, stand outside, and eyeball the general store. They walk into the street.
6. EXT. GENERAL STORE – DAY
Brewford and his son get supplies for their house.
Scene Arch: Brewford and BJ walk into the general store. The store owner welcomes them with advice and informing Brewford about the rules of the town.
Essence: Brewford loses his son outside the general store.
Conflict: Two men abduct BJ.
Subtext: Brewford scrambles to find BJ almost in a panic.
Hope/fear: We hope BJ can escape from the men.
Beginning (Mislead) The store owner welcomes Brewford and Son to the store and town, with Southern hospitality.
Middle (Betrayal) The store owner informs a small child to fetch him something. They run outside and speak to Brewford Jr.
End (surprise) Brewford Jr speaks with the child then is kidnapped by the two men he aimed his riffle at earlier.
7. INT. CLYDES SPOT – DAY
Brewford looks for his son, to Brewford hauling ass on his horse out of town alone.
Scene Arch: Brewford walks into Clyde’s spot during the piano recital. He leaves the spot pissed.
Essence: Brewford is looking for BJ.
Conflict: Brewford and one of Clydes men square off.
Subtext: Brewford is able to read the room and knows Clyde is in charge.
Hope/fear: We hope Clyde doesn’t harm Brewford for interrupting.
Beginning (Superior position) Brewford barges into Clydes spot demanding answers.
Middle (Uncertainty) The sheriff walks in the spot, Brewford approaches him then realizes he is not on his side of the law.
End (External dilemma) Brewford stands down. He knows he is outnumbered. He leaves.
8. EXT. OPEN PLAIN – DAY
Brewford hauls ass back to the ranch.
Scene Arch: Brewford rides his horse, pulling BJ’s close at full speed, headed back home.
Essence: Brewford rushing back to his house.
Conflict: BJ’s horse not wanting to run full speed.
Subtext: Brewford controlling the horse.
Hope/fear: we hope the horse will corporate.
Beginning (Character changes radically) Brewford hauls like a mad man out of town.
Middle (Misinterpretation) The horse doesn’t want to run because Brewford Jr. isn’t ridding him.
End (Uncomfortable moment) Brewford is trying to force BJ’s horse to move. He realizes his actions and stops to comfort the animal.
9. INT. PLANTATION – DAY
Clyde’s life as the plantation owner.
Scene Arch: Clyde returns home. He goes straight to the barn to tend to his horses. He speaks to BJ
then has relations with two women of the house.
Essence: Clyde’s life as the plantation owner.
Conflict: Clydes dominance over BJ and the other slaves.
Subtext: Clyde physiologically bullying BJ.
Hope/fear: We hope Clyde doesn’t punish BJ or his slaves.
Beginning (Suspense) Clyde’s men lock Brewford Jr in a shed, as Clyde enters his horse stable.
Middle (Mislead/reveal) Clyde reveals how he became the plantation owner.
End (Surprise) Clyde serenades the two women of the house with his piano playing.
NOTE: ADD SCENE AT THE HOUSE.
Two Natives are present.
10. EXT. MEETING area – DAY
Brewford pleads for the community to stand up to Clyde.
Scene Arch: Brewford stands before a group, giving a speech until receiving news that his daughter and another girl are missing.
Essence: The need to gather a small army.
Conflict: Brewford’s daughter is kidnapped, and the people oppose Brewford’s plan due to the fear of Clyde.
Subtext: Brewford is slightly frustrated with the towns people.
Hope/fear: We hope the people will want to fight. We fear Brewford’s daughter isn’t going to be okay.
Beginning (More interesting setting) A secluded amp style theater with a podium among trees, surrounded by log cabins.
Middle (Misinterpretation) Someone stands against Brewfords cry for help.
End (Major twist) Someone announces, two children are missing. (uncertainty) Someone accuses Brewford of bringing bad luck to the community.
11. ext. MEETING area – DAY
People pass by Brewford, showing him no love.
Scene Arch: The Women of the town approach Brewford after his speech, then take him to meet a few ex-soldiers.
Essence: The women empathize with Brewford and his wife.
Conflict: The opposition of the towns people.
Subtext: Brewford realizes they aren’t soldiers.
Hope/fear: We hope someone will join him to fight.
Beginning (intrigue) Two women approach Brewford and his wife to inform them the towns people have a relationship with Clyde.
Middle (Betrayal) One of the men who spoke against Brewford is seen collecting money from a strange man.
End (Mislead) The two women suggest Brewford and his wife follow them to their house to meet their husbands.
12. INT. PLANTATION – DAY
Clyde prepares to possibly be visited by an enemy.
Scene Arch: Clyde gathers weapons. Clyde sees Brewford’s daughter from the window.
Essence: Clyde polishes knifes. Plays the piano, considering it might be his last time playing.
Conflict: Someone brings news the Calvary has crossed the Texas
border. They also bring Brewford’s daughter.
Subtext: Clyde realizes it might be over soon.
Hope/fear: We fear that Clyde may snap and harm BJ and his sister.
Beginning (external dilemma) Clyde gathers weapons then receives news from the sheriff about the calvary.
Middle (internal dilemma) Clyde is frantic, he chooses between weapons and the piano.
End (uncertainty) Clyde looks at the sheriff then ponders his words before sitting at the piano to play.
13. INT. SOLDIER SPOT – DAY
Brewford meets with the soldiers. He relates to them through war stories. They agree to help him fight.
Scene Arch: Brewford, his wife and the women approach two men. The men agree with Brewfords request.
Essence: The ex-soldiers agree to help Brewford rescue his children and others.
Conflict: One soldier is completely stand offish. Their horses go missing.
Subtext: Brewford prepares and gathers weapons.
Hope/fear: We fear they may be outnumbered without the guns and ammo.
Beginning (Character changes radically) Brewford introduces himself as a war hero to the men.
Middle (Reveal) The two men inform Brewford that they served in the army.
End (Betrayal) someone from the meeting is sneaking around the horses. (Major twist) horses go missing and guns.
14. EXT. HOUSE – DAY
Brewford and the soldiers gather supplies. (Note: Rifles in the wagon)
Scene Arch: Brewford and the soldiers ride to his house. The women are preparing horses and guns of their own. The natives have gathered to accompany Brewford on the fight.
Essence: The Natives mount up and ride with the men onto the plantation to fight next to them.
Conflict: The soldiers don’t believe the women should come.
Subtext: Brewford needs to decide if the women will ride.
Hope/fear: We fear the women may become captives also.
Beginning (Suspense) several people at the house gather supplies to go into battle.
Middle (Misinterpretation) The women folk prepare horses and guns as if they are riding into battle.
End (uncertainty) someone reveals that Clyde has more men then known.
15. EXT. PLANTATION – day
Brewford meets Clyde. They fight toe to toe.
Scene Arch: Brewford and his crew arrive, they have a shoot out with Clydes men.
Essence: The rescue.
Conflict: A knife fight. Turned into a bare-knuckle fight.
Subtext: Brewford and Clyde square off face to face, they fight without weapons.
Hope/fear: We hope Brewford kills Clyde and frees the children from captivity.
Beginning (superior position) Clyde receives word that Brewford is a war hero.
Middle (suspense) one by one Clyde’s men get killed
End (reveal) Brewford fights Clyde and defeats him. The children are reunited with their parents.
16. EXT. PLANTATION – DAY
The victory.
Scene Arch: The fight is over and the Calvary rides in.
Essence: The Calvary declares slavery officially illegal.
Conflict: A possible standoff with the Calvary.
Subtext: Brewford is relieved.
Hope/fear: We hope the Calvary doesn’t arrest Brewford.
Beginning (surprise) everyone is happy about the reunion.
Middle (major twist) The US Calvary arrives at the plantation with guns drawn on the survivors.
End (Reveal) The US Calvary announces the end of
slavery -
Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Scene requirements
My vision is that I am an A plus screenplay writer, who’s scripts are produced into extremely profitable movies which I cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is the beginning middle and end of a scene must be present.
The emancipation of 1865
Genre: Western/action
EXT. OPEN PLAIN – DAY
BREWFORD and his family, ride a two-horse wagon across an open plain in 1863.
Essence: The family is migrating to a new land.
Conflict: The are harassed by three men on horses demanding freedom papers.
Subtext: Brewford is calm, witty and sees a potential treat.
Hope/fear: We hope they migrate safely.
EXT. HOUSE – DAY
The family arrives at the new house.
Essence: Happiness, joy.
Conflict: The men ride up on horses, BJ aims a shotgun at them. One of the men pull his pistol.
Subtext: Brewford is gentle, patience with his son’s actions, in control.
Hope/fear: We hope the men don’t shoot each other.
INT. CLYDES SPOT – DAY
Essence: Clyde as a bad mother sucka. People fear him.
Conflict: What happens when you interrupt Clyde playing the piano?
Subtext: Clyde is displacing his pain.
Hope/fear: We hope no one will ever cross Clyde.
EXT. IN TOWN – DAY
Brewford and Brewford Jr ride into town.
Essence: Brewford gathering supplies for the house with his son.
Conflict: The townspeople eyeballing Brewford and BJ. The store owner informing Brewford about the rules of the town.
Subtext: Brewford being aware of his suroundings.
Hope/fear: We fear the news about captivity.
INT. CLYDES SPOT – DAY
Clyde views Brewford and BJ ride into town. Clyde tells his men to go bring him the young boy, Brewford Jr.
Essence: The soothing hypnotic sound of the piano.
Conflict: Clyde’s men beat someone up who disrupted the piano session.
Subtext: Clyde’s musical keystrokes make his men become more aggressive.
Hope/fear: We hope no one else interrupts Clyde’s playing.
EXT. GENERAL STORE – DAY
Brewford and BJ walk into the general store. The store owner welcomes them with advice.
Essence: Brewford loses his son outside the general store.
Conflict: Two men abduct BJ.
Subtext: Brewford scrambles to find BJ almost in a panic.
Hope/fear: We hope BJ can escape from the men.
INT. CLYDES SPOT – DAY
Brewford walks into Clyde’s spot during the piano recital.
Essence: Brewford is looking for BJ.
Conflict: Brewford and Clyde square off.
Subtext: Brewford is able to read the room and knows Clyde is in charge.
Hope/fear: We hope Clyde doesn’t harm Brewford for attacking him.
EXT. OPEN PLAIN – DAY
Brewford rides his horse, pulling BJ’s close at full speed, headed back home.
Essence: Brewford rushing back to his house.
Conflict: BJ’s horse not wanting to run full speed.
Subtext: Brewford controlling the horse.
Hope/fear: we hope the horse will corporate.
INT. PLANTATION – DAY
Clyde returns home. He goes straight to the barn to tend to his horses. He speaks to BJ then a slave.
Essence: Clyde’s life as the plantation owner.
Conflict: Clydes dominance over BJ and the other slaves.
Subtext: Clyde physiologically bullying BJ.
Hope/fear: We hope Clyde doesn’t punish BJ or his slaves.
INT. MEETING ROOM – DAY
Brewford stands before a group, giving a speech.
Essence: The need to gather a small army.
Conflict: Brewford’s daughter is kidnapped, and the people appose Brewford’s plan due to the fear of Clyde.
Subtext: Brewford is slightly frustrated with the towns people.
Hope/fear: We hope the people will want to fight. We fear Brewford’s daughter isn’t going to be okay.
INT. MEETING ROOM – DAY
The Women of the town approach Brewford after his speech, then take Brewford to meet a few ex-soldiers.
Essence: The women empathize with Brewford and his wife.
Conflict: The opposition of the towns people.
Subtext: Brewford realizes they aren’t soldiers.
Hope/fear: We hope someone will join him to fight.
INT. PLANTATION – DAY
Clyde prepares to possibly be visited by Bewford.
Essence: Clyde polishes knifes. Plays the piano, considering it might be his last time playing.
Conflict: Someone brings news the Calvery has crossed the Texas border and Brewford’s daughter.
Subtext: Clyde realizes it might be over soon.
Hope/fear: we fear that Clyde may snap and harm BJ and his sister.
INT. SOLDIER SPOT – DAY
Brewford meets with the soldiers. He relates to them through war stories.
Essence: The ex-soldiers agree to help Brewford rescue his children.
Conflict: one soldier is completely stand offish. Their horses go missing.
Subtext: Brewford trains with the soldiers. Prepares weapons.
Hope/fear: We fear they may be outnumbered without the guns and ammo.
EXT. HOUSE – DAY
Brewford and the soldiers ride to his house. The women are preparing horses and guns of their own.
Essence: The women mount up and ride with the men onto the plantation to fight next to them.
Conflict: The soldiers don’t believe the women should come.
Subtext: Brewford is out reasoned by his wife.
Hope/fear: We fear the women may become captives also.
EXT. PLANTATION – DAY
Clyde meets Brewford toe to toe for a fight.
Essence: The rescue.
Conflict: A knife fight. Turned into a bare-knuckle fight.
Subtext: Brewford and Clyde square off face to face, they fight without weapons.
Hope/fear: We hope Brewford kills Clyde and frees the children from captivity.
EXT. PLANTATION – DAY
The Calvery rides in.
Essence: The Calvery declares slavery officially illegal.
Conflict: A standoff with the Calvery.
Subtext: Brewford is relieved.
Hope/fear: We hope the Calvery doesn’t arrest Brewford.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Intriguing moments
My vision: I am an A plus screen writer, who’s scripts are produced into profitable movies, that provide me with large amounts of money.
What I learned doing this assignment is this process has expanded my thoughts about the details of scene writing.
Act 1
Hidden identity – BS remains silent concealing his abilities, knowing he is a platoon leader.
Cover up – BS signals for his wife not to pull the shotgun she has.
Secret – Clyde has received news from the sheriff which shows us a glimpse of his rage.
Act 2
Covert agenda – As Clyde watches BS and BJ ride into town, he whispers to his men, who reach to his command.
Scheme – Clyde tells his man to capture BJ
Cover up – Clyde lies to BS about his son’s whereabouts. He also lies about slavery knowing it is about to end.
Intrigue – Clyde has hundreds of slaves at his ranch.
Act 3
Hidden Identity – The soldiers are ruthless men that don’t take any mess.
Conspiracy – Clyde has an agenda to keep his slaves in bondage forever.
Act 4
Intrigue – Clyde informs BS about his relation to slavery.
Superior position – BS lets Clyde know he is the famous platoon leader.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Emotional moments.
My vision is that I am an A plus screen writer, who’s scripts are produced into extremely profitable movies, which pay me very well!
What I learned doing this assignment is about weaving in the highs and lows of drama.
ACT 1 Emotions –
Hidden weakness: He is haunted by what he saw growing up on the plantation. He is haunted by what the battlefield did to him.
Wound: BS is very reserved, quite almost to himself. If the family wasn’t present, he would be.
Courage: BS stands up to the men harassing him about his freedom, using the law to justify his case. He escapes the confrontation without violence.
Distress – Great pain, anxiety, or sorrow; emotional or mental suffering. BS has great pain, anxiety and sorrow having his son taking from him.
ACT 2 Emotions –
Anger – BS is in raged buy his interaction with Clyde
Emotional dilemma – There is no way around it. BS must fight. He must find a way to get BJ back safe.
ACT 3 Emotions –
Bonding – BS meets the soldiers. They connect over war stories
Wounds – The towns people express that their children have been taken into captivity by Clyde. Each stating the amount of time.
Anger/distress – Once BS daughter is captured, he loses it.
ACT 4 Emotions
Moral Issue – Although BS doesn’t want to shed any blood, both of his children are now enslaved.
Sacrifice – BS’s wife demands that she be allowed to participate in the fight.
Courage – BS and the towns people muster up the heart to go get their loved ones back
Winning – BS defeats Clyde by chocking the life out of him. The government arrives in town declaring slavery against the law.
Love – Everyone is reunited with their families.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”.
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Reveals!
My vision is to become an A plus screenplay writer, who’s writing is produces into extremely profitable movies that pay me well.
What I learned from doing this assignment is the time you spend prewriting will save you dafts.
4-Act Structure –
Act 1 PJS Opening, family rides across an open plain in 1863.
ACTION – Drives a two-horse wagon, remains quit, minding his business, pitches a campfire, fixes the wagon wheel with his son.
PJS – (added) Family is harassed before crossing the Texas border.
SETUP – A Native American is watching the family in the distance from the top of a horse.
ACTION – He presents papers of identification. He is short with three men on horses asking for papers. He allows his wife to speak while he sizes the men up. He signals for his wife not to raise her double barrel shot gun she is concealing. He reasons.
Family arrives to new house 1865
ACTION – looks at his family as they brisk fully walk to the front door. He exhales then removes his hat as he steps toward his family. He doesn’t go in the house. He walks around the perimeter
PJS – (added) Family is given a sly welcome to the neighborhood. Brewford Jr aims a rifle to scare them away.
ACTION – He walks around to see BJ pointing a rifle at two men on horses. He signals BJ to settle down. He reasons with the men.
REVEAL – BS and family are welcomed to the home by his brother-in-law who is the Native American.
AJS Clyde is in town speaking with the Sheriff then gets word a new family has arrived in town. Clyde sits to play the piano.
SETUP – Clyde receives a telegram.
ACTION – Clyde lights a cigar at the bar. Quietly walks to the piano Plays the piano aggressively yet beautifully. He instructs his men with whispers.
PJS – (added) Brewford, Brewford Jr and the Native American ride into town.
ACTION – BS surveys every building and every face from the top of his horse. Dismounts at the town store. Walks into the store with BJ. Hands him a bag allowing him to leave. .
AJS II: Clyde tells his men to go bring him the young boy, Brewford Jr.
ACTION – Watches BS and BJ ride into town while playing the piano. Motions to his man whispers in his ear. Grabs his continuing to play with one hand.
REVEAL – Clyde knows the Calvary is traveling spreading news about slavery ending but he wants to enslave every Black American in Texas.
PJS II: Son gets kid napped by local townsmen.
ACTION – Scrambles to find BJ almost a panic. Rushes in and out of buildings. Walks into the saloon.
TP: Brewford confronts Clyde about his son missing. Brewford sniffs out the lie Clyde tells.
Act 2 Reaction: PJS: Brewford attempts to attack Clyde but fails.
AJS Reaction: Calm cool and collected as his me handle the light work.
ACTION – Smokes a cigar, blows smoke in BS face.
SETUP – Clyde isn’t bothering the blacks walking free in the town.
PJS The plan: Go back to town a gather some troops.
ACTION – Gives a motivational speech.
AJS The plan: Returns to the plantation to train his horses.
REVEAL – Some of the black are his relatives.
ACTION – Arrives home goes straight to the horses. Admires the animals. Talks to BJ. Visits a slave.
PJS Turning point 2: While gathering troops Brewfords daughter is kidnapped.
ACTION – Chases men on horse. Fires a rifle.
SETUP – A glimpse of his skill with weapons. He teaches a few of the women.
AJS Turning point 2: Has a moment realizing what Brewford did, so he sends word to kidnap Brewfords daughter.
ACTION – Reads a book, hits the arm of his chair.
Act 3 PJS The Women of the town take Brewford to meet a few ex-soldiers.
SETUP – The ex- soldiers are buffalo
AJS Prepares to possibly be visited by Bewford.
SETUP – Clyde has a meeting with the sheriff and his mate.
ACTION – Polishes two knifes. Plays the piano.
PJS New Plan: The ex-soldiers agree to help Brewford rescue his children,
REVEAL – Some of their Children have been kidnapped also by Clyde.
ACTION – Trains with the town’s men. Prepares weapons.
PJS Mid-point: Before they leave to fight a few of their horses go missing.
ACTION – Pairs people to ride together. Organizes people to fight.
Act 4 PJS The women mount up and ride the men onto the plantation and fight alongside them.
REVEAL – The mothers know how to use weapons extremely well. They have a shootout.
AJS Clyde meets Brewford toe to toe for a fight.
ACTION – Fights BS with the knifes. Lowers them to the ground then squares off to box.
PJS Brewford and Clyde square off face to face, they fight and Brewford kills him. The children are let out of captivity by the women. The US Calvery rides into town declaring slavery against the law.
REVEAL – Clyde his detest for blacks. His childhood. The pain of his mental health.
ACTION – He squares off to have a bare-knuckle fight. BS body slams him. He chocks Clyde out killing him.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Character Action Tracks!
My vision is that I am an A plus screenplay writer, producing extremely profitable films who write intriguing scripts that are produced into extremely profitable movies, that I cash large checks from.
Doing this assignment taught me the importance of visualizing scenes.
Brewford4-Act Structure – Act 1 PJS Opening, family rides across an open plain in 1863.
ACTION – Drives a two-horse wagon, remains quit, minding his business, pitches a campfire, fixes the wagon wheel with his son.
PJS – (added) Family is harassed before crossing the Texas border.
ACTION – He presents papers of identification. He is short with three men on horses asking for papers. He allows his wife to speak while he sizes the men up. He signals for his wife not to raise her double barrel shot gun she is concealing. He reasons.
Family arrives to new house 1865
ACTION – looks at his family as they brisk fully walk to the front door. He exhales then removes his hat as he steps toward his family. He doesn’t go in the house. He walks around the perimeter
PJS – (added) Family is given a sly welcome to the neighborhood. Brewford Jr aims a rifle to scare them away.
ACTION – He walks around to see BJ pointing a rifle at two men on horses. He signals BJ to settle down. He reasons with the men.
AJS Clyde is in town speaking with the Sheriff then gets word a new family has arrived in town. Clyde sits to play the piano.
ACTION – Clyde lights a cigar at the bar. Quietly walks to the piano Plays the piano aggressively yet beautifully. He instructs his men with whispers.
PJS – (added) Brewford and Brewford Jr ride into town.
ACTION – BS surveys every building and every face from the top of his horse. Dismounts at the town store. Walks into the store with BJ. Hands him a bag allowing him to leave. .
AJS II : Clyde tells his men to go bring him the young boy, Brewford Jr.
ACTION – Watches BS and BJ ride into town while playing the piano. Motions to his man whispers in his ear. Grabs his continuing to play with one hand.
PJS II: Son gets kid napped by local townsmen.
ACTION – Scrambles to find BJ almost a panic. Rushes in and out of buildings. Walks into the saloon.
TP: Brewford confronts Clyde about his son missing. Brewford sniffs out the lie Clyde tells.
Act 2 Reaction: PJS: Brewford attempts to attack Clyde but fails.
AJS Reaction: Calm cool and collected as his me handle the light work.
ACTION – Smokes a cigar, blows smoke in BS face.
PJS The plan: Go back to town a gather some troops.
ACTION – Gives a motivational speech.
AJS The plan: Returns to the plantation to train his horses.
ACTION – Arrives home goes straight to the horses. Admires the animals. Talks to BJ. Visits a slave.
PJS Turning point 2: While gathering troops Brewfords daughter is kidnapped.
ACTION – Chases men on horse. Fires a rifle.
AJS Turning point 2: Has a moment realizing what Brewford did, so he sends word to kidnap Brewfords daughter.
ACTION – Reads a book, hits the arm of his chair.
Act 3 PJS The Women of the town take Brewford to meet a few ex-soldiers.
AJS Prepares to possibly be visited by Bewford.
ACTION – Polishes two knifes. Plays the piano.
PJS New Plan: The ex-soldiers agree to help Brewford rescue his children, some of their Children have been kidnapped also by Clyde.
ACTION – Trains with the town’s men. Prepares weapons.
PJS Mid-point: Before they leave to fight a few of their horses go missing.
ACTION – Pares people to ride together. Organizes people to fight.
Act 4 PJS The women mount up and ride the men onto the plantation and fight alongside them.
AJS Clyde meets Brewford toe to toe for a fight.
ACTION – Fights BS with the knifes. Lowers them to the ground then squares off to box.
PJS Brewford and Clyde square off face to face, they fight and Brewford kills him. The children are let out of captivity by the women. The US Calvery rides into town declaring slavery against the law.
ACTION – He squares off to have a bare-knuckle fight. BS body slams him. He chocks Clyde out killing him.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Subject line: Joaquin Ibn Gray’s New Outline Beats!
My vision is that I am an A plus screenplay write, who write intriguing scripts that are produced into extremely profitable movies, that I cash large checks from.
“What I learned from doing this assignment is, reviewing this outline has exposed me to a different way of generating ideas.
4-Act Structure – Act 1 PJS Opening, family rides across an open plain in 1863.
PJS-(added) Family is harassed before crossing the Texas border.
Family arrives to new house 1865
PJS -(added) Family is given a sly welcome to the neighborhood. Brewford Jr aims a rifle to scare them away.
AJS Clyde is in town speaking with the Sheriff then gets word a new family has arrived in town. Clyde sits to play the piano.
PJS -(added) Brewford and Brewford Jr ride into town.
AJS II : Clyde tells his men to go bring him the young boy, Brewford Jr.
PJS II: Son gets kid napped by local townsmen.
TP: Brewford confronts Clyde about his son missing. Brewford sniffs out the lie Clyde tells.
Act 2 Reaction: PJS: Brewford attempts to attack Clyde but fails.
AJS Reaction: Calm cool and collected as his me handle the light work.
PJS The plan: Go back to town a gather some troops.
AJS The plan: Returns to the plantation to train his horses.
PJS Turning point 2: While gathering troops Brewfords daughter is kidnapped.
AJS Turning point 2: Has a moment realizing what Brewford did, so he sends word to kidnap Brewfords daughter.
Act 3 PJS The Women of the town take Brewford to meet a few ex-soldiers.
AJS Prepares to possibly be visited by Bewford.
PJS New Plan: The ex-soldiers agree to help Brewford rescue his children, some of their Children have been kidnapped also by Clyde.
PJS Mid-point: Before they leave to fight a few of their horses go missing.
Act 4 PJS The women mount up and ride the men onto the plantation and fight alongside them.
AJS Clyde meets Brewford toe to toe for a fight.
PJS Brewford and Clyde square off face to face, they fight and Brewford kills him. The children are let out of captivity by the women. The US Calvery rides into town declaring slavery against the law.
Joaquin Ibn Gray
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Beet Sheet – Draft 1
My vision is that I am an A plus screen writer, writing screenplay that get produced into extremely profitable movies which I benefit financially from.
“What I learned from doing this assignment is following beets give you the flow of the screen play?
4-Act Structure – Act 1 PJS Opening, family rides across an open plain in 1863. Family arrives to new house 1865
AJS Clyde is in town speaking with the Sheriff then gets word a new family has arrived in town. Clyde sits to play the piano.
AJS II: Clyde tells his men to go bring him somebody.
PJS II: Son gets kid napped by local townsmen.
TP: Brewford rides into town and confronts Clyde about his son missing. Brewford sniffs out the lie Clyde tells.
Act 2 Reaction: PJS: Brewford attempts to attack Clyde but fails.
AJS Reaction: Calm cool and collected as his me handle the light work.
PJS The plan: Go back to town a gather some troops.
AJS The plan: Returns to the plantation to train his horses.
PJS Turning point 2: While gathering troops Brewford’s daughter is kidnapped.
AJS Turning point 2: Has a moment realizing what Brewford did, so he sends word to kidnap Brewford’s daughter.
Act 3 PJS The Women of the town take Brewford to meet a few ex-soldiers.
AJS Prepares to possibly be visited by Brewford.
PJS New Plan: The ex-soldiers agree to help Brewford rescue his children, some of their Children have been kidnapped also by Clyde.
PJS Midpoint: Before they leave to fight a few of their horses go missing.
Act 4 PJS The women mount up and ride the men onto the plantation and fight alongside them.
AJS Clyde meets Brewford toe to toe for a fight.
PJS Brewford and Clyde square off face to face, they fight and Brewford kills him. The children are let out of captivity by the women. The US Calvery rides into town declaring slavery against the law.
Genre Conventions – Western
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Deeper Layer!
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is by starting with the outer sides of the puzzle, the middle will become clearer as time goes on.
Surface Layer: A family’s migration from southern slavery.
Deeper Layer: They have settled in a state where slavery is the law.
Major Reveal: Brewford goes into town and witnesses’ black people being captured.
Influences Surface Story Clyde knows Brewford’s military past. Informs him of his authority over the slaves and Texas hasn’t outlawed it.
Hints: Clyde reveals his relationship with the towns people
Changes Reality: Clyde is dealing with the struggle of self.
Brewfords wife
Beginning: Raising two children in the deep south as a slave.
Inciting Incident: When Brewford tell her that Brewford Jr has been kidnapped.
Turning Point 1: She meets a few mixed-race towns women, that are connected to soldiers
Act 2: She takes Brewford to meet the towns people.
Turning Point 2 / Midpoint: Clyde captures their daughter.
Act 3: She mobilizes the towns people
Turning Point 3: She joins the fight to rescue her children.
Act 4 Climax: She fights and kills the plantation workers
Resolution: She saves her children then watches the US military ride into town announcing
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Character Structure
My vision for the completion of this class is that I will write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is to see the simple things first. Map it out and it will form.
Protagonist Brewford Dickson
Beginning: Brewford Dickson rides a wagon into Texas
Inciting Incident: Brewford Jr. is kidnapped by a few of Clyde’s men for their ranch
Turning Point 1: Brewford rides into the local town seeking help from the local Sheriff but runs into Clyde kidnapping people in the town.
Act 2: Brewford stumbles upon a community of mixed-race soldiers who offer their assistance to recover Brewford Jr.
Turning Point 2 / Midpoint: Clyde personally captivates Brewford’s daughter
Act 3: Brewford agrees to utilities the soldiers help to save his children.
Turning Point 3: Brewfords wife and the towns women join the fight to save the children.
Act 4 Climax: Brewford kills Clyde Fordwood.
Resolution: A US Calvery rides into town declaring slavery officially against the law.
Antagonist Clyde Fordwood
Beginning: He inherited the largest plantation in Texas after his father died.
Inciting Incident: He was interrupted with the news of salves running away during his piano practice.
Turning Point 1: He is in town playing the piano in the saloon when Brewford walks in looking for answers.
Act 2: He sends his men to follow Brewford.
Turning Point 2 / Midpoint. Clyde learns that Brewford has met the soldiers
Act 3: He prepares for an attack of his plantation.
Turning Point 3: He plays his piano aggressively to relieve his stress and makes weapons
Act 4 Climax: He fights Brewford.
Resolution: The slaves on the plantation celebrate at the news of Clyde’s death and their freedom.
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Supporting Characters
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is how to limit the number of characters in a screenplay and bring everything into focus with defining roles.
Supporting Characters: Brewfords wife (I don’t know her name yet), Brewford Jr, Thelma, Background Characters: Towns people,
Support 1:
Name: Brewfords wife (don’t know her name yet) <div>
Role: Live with Brewford and raise their children.
Main purpose: To push Brewford to become active
Value: Family first
Support 2:
Name: Brewford Jr</div>
Role: become a captive.
<div>
Main purpose: to push the plot forward
Value: courageous
Support 3:
Name: Thelma</div><div>
Role: live as part of the Dickson family.
Main purpose: to emotionally connect the audience to the family.
Value: Family first
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Character Profiles Part 2
My vision for the completion of this class is that I will write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is a complete way to flush out a character.
A. The High Concept – The story of a Black American family that migrates from Georgia to Texas after the emancipation proclamation of 1863. Little did they know slavery would not be outlawed in Texas until June 19th, 1865, the day and fight of a lifetime.<div>
B. This character’s journey- Brewford migrates to Texas to start a new life after the end of slavery. He discovers slavery hasn’t been outlawed just yet. His son is forced into captivity causing him to fight for his freedom.
C. The Actor Attractors for this character.
What about this role would cause an actor to want to be known for it? This character transforms into a hero on the battlefield.
What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in your story? He conceals the true nature of his past, knowing he is deadly.
What are the most interesting actions the Lead could take in the script? How can you introduce this role in a way that could sell it to an actor? An ex-slave turned platoon commander, that gained his freedom by fighting in a war against slavery.
What could be this character’s emotional range? Begins as a meek, non-confrontational man that is transformed into a killer after his child is captured by the local plantation owner.
What subtext can the actor play? He is attempting to live a quiet life. in a new land free from bondage.
What’s the most interesting relationship this character can have? He is the brother-in-law of a local village man.
How will this character’s unique voice be presented? Through his words of wisdom and foresight.
What could make this character special and unique? His legs have been cut off at the knees, so his fighting style gives him an advantage.
Role in the Story: Protagonist
Age range and Description: 50’s, modestly dressed for the time period. His legs are cut off at his knees.
Core Traits: Meek, alert, silent killer, Motivation; Want/Need: To live a peaceful life with his family – To save his son from captivity.
Wound: Traumatized by his childhood memories and war memories.
Likability, Relatability, Empathy: Likability: A simple man, A family man that is nice to his children and wife. He treats his horses with love and kindness.
Relatability: appreciative of his possessions, he fixes his damaged wagon with his teenage son.
Empathy: His legs are cut off at his knees. He doesn’t want help reaching for items above his head. His arm strength allows him to pull his body up for whatever needs to be done.
7. Character Subtext: Quite reserved man
8. Character Intrigue: traumatized by memories of growing up on a plantation.
9. Flaw: extremely passive toward people that are weaker than him.
10. Values: he loves his family more than anything in the world.
11. Character Dilemma: he puts the feelings of others above his own.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Character Profiles Part 1
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is that plugging in these answers shapes the characters actions and unique voice.
A. The High Concept – The story of a Black American family that migrates from Georgia to Texas after the emancipation proclamation of 1863. Little did they know slavery would not be outlawed in Texas until June 19th, 1865, the day and fight of a lifetime.<div>
B. This character’s journey- Brewford migrates to Texas to start a new life after the end of slavery. He discovers slavery hasn’t been outlawed just yet. His son is forced into captivity causing him to fight for his freedom.
C. The Actor Attractors for this character.
1. What about this role would cause an actor to want to be known for it? This character transforms into a hero on the battlefield.
2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in your story? He conceals the true nature of his past, knowing he is deadly.
3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead could take in the script? How can you introduce this role in a way that could sell it to an actor? An ex-slave turned platoon commander, that gained his freedom by fighting in a war against slavery.
4. What could be this character’s emotional range? Begins as a meek, non-confrontational man that is transformed into a killer after his child is captured by the local plantation owner.
5. What subtext can the actor play? He is attempting to live a quiet life. in a new land free from bondage.
6. What’s the most interesting relationship this character can have? He is the brother-in-law of a local village man
7. How will this character’s unique voice be presented? Through his words of wisdom and foresight
8. What could make this character special and unique? His legs have been cut off at the knees, so his fighting style gives him an advantage.
BREWFORD DICKSON
Role in the Story: Protagonist
Age range and Description: 50’s, modestly dressed for the time period. His legs are cut off at his knees.
Core Traits: Meek, alert, silent killer,
Motivation; Want/Need: To live a peaceful life with his family – To save his son from captivity.
Wound: Traumatized by his childhood memories and war memories.
Likability, Relatability, Empathy: Likability: A simple man, A family man that is nice to his children and wife. He treats his horses with love and kindness.
Relatability: appreciative of his possessions, he fixes his damaged wagon with his teenage son.
Empathy: His legs are cut off at his knees. He doesn’t want help reaching for items above his head. His arm strength allows him to pull his body up for whatever needs to be done.
Joaquin
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Joaquin”Ibn Gray’s” Likability/Relatability/Empathy
My vision for the completion of this class is that I will write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is how characters grow into their essence. They start with an idea of who they are in name, yet this process shapes them.
BREWFORD DICKSON: Protagonist
Likability: A simple man, A family man that is nice to his children and wife. He treats his horses with love and kindness.<div>
Relatability: appreciative of his possessions, he fixes his damaged wagon with his teenage son.
Empathy: His legs are cut off at his knees. He doesn’t want help reaching for items above his head. His arm strength allows him to pull his body up for whatever needs to be done.
CLYDE FORDWOOD: Antagonist
Likability: He plays the piano beautifully.</div><div>
Relatability: He is extremely polite to his audience.
Empathy: He narrates a story of his childhood after his performance. The story-his parents died in a house fire when he was a child causing him to grow up as an orphan.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Character Intrigue
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is to write the first thing which comes to mind. The characters will reveal things to you which will translate to the page.
Character Name: Brewford Dickson
Role:<div>Hidden agendas:
Competition:
Conspiracies:
Secrets: Deception:
Unspoken Wound: he was traumatized by the actions of living on a plantation
Secret Identity: He is a silent killer
Character Name: Clyde Fordwood
Role:</div><div>
Hidden agendas: to enslave every black American in Texas
Competition:
Conspiracies:
Secrets: Deception: A piano player luring victims through sound
Unspoken Wound: his childhood a time of hard living
Secret Identity:
Brewford may experience different daydreams, triggered by images of young children playing.
Clyde Fordwood’s anger can be triggered by men and women walking as a couple.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Subtext Characters
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is that I am becoming better and more comfortable at writing loglines.
Movie Title: Inside Man<div>
Character Name: Dalton Russell
Subtext Identity: A mastermind thief
Subtext Trait: Cunning
Subtext Logline: Dalton Russell a mastermind thief whose cunning behavior allows him to rob a bank without being caught. Possible Areas of Subtext: Not really a killer, A nice guy that wants someone corrupt to pay for their misdeeds, outsmarts the detective, police department, has an o shit moment once S.W.A.T enters the bank.
Character Name: Brewford Dickson
Subtext Identity: A humble family man
Subtext Trait: skilled military leader
Subtext Logline: A humble family man transformed into a skilled military leader after his son was captured by a local plantation owner.
Possible Areas of Subtext: He wants to destroy the plantation owner, wants the government to honor the law created desires to protect his family and others.
Character Name: Clyde Fordwood
Subtext Identity: The tyrant
Subtext Trait: Treacherous
Subtext Logline: The tyrant plantation owner with treacherous tactics involving slavery
Possible Areas of Subtext: Not loved as a child, witnessed his parents burned in a fire. forced to grow up without proper care
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Actor attractors!
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is how to generate character qualities and actions.
Lead Character Name: Brewford Dickson
Role: Protagonist
What about this role would cause an actor to want to be known for it? This character transforms into a hero on the battlefield.<div>
What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in your story? He conceals the true nature of his past, knowing he is deadly.
What are the most interesting actions the Lead could take in the script? How can you introduce this role in a way that could sell it to an actor? An ex-slave turned platoon commander, that gained his freedom by fighting in a war against slavery.
What could be this character’s emotional range? Begins as a meek, non-confrontational man that is transformed into a killer after his child is captured by the local plantation owner.
What subtext can the actor play? He is attempting to live a quiet life. in a new land free from bondage.
What’s the most interesting relationship this character can have? He is the brother-in-law of a local village man.
How will this character’s unique voice be presented? Through his words of wisdom and foresight
What could make this character special and unique? His legs have been cut off at the knees, so his fighting style gives him an advantage.
<font color=”#4d5c6d” face=”SF UI Text, sans-serif”>Joaquin </font>
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Actor attractors for Inside Man
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is to think about unique ways a character can be flushed out before creating them.
INSIDE MAN (2006)
Protagonist Detective Keith Frazier
Antagonist Dalton Russell
1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role?
Detective Keith Frazier– This character is smooth, intelligent and climbing the ladder in his career.
Dalton Russell – This character is witty, clever, three steps ahead of law enforcement and the leader of a heist.
2. What makes this character the most interesting character in the movie?
Detective Keith Frazier – works strictly by the book, is in charge and doesn’t back down to those who may challenge his authority.
Dalton Russell – This character is calm, knows exactly what he is pursuing and doesn’t deviate from it.
3. What are the most interesting actions the lead takes in the movie?
Detective Keith Frazier attempts to drags Dalton down a flight of stairs outside of the bank being robbed.
Dalton Russell meets with a hired broker inside of the bank and shows her that his knowledge is greater than hers.
4. How is the character introduced that could sell it to an actor?
Detective Keith Fraizer is introduced with a need to lead an investigation of a bank robbery in progress.
Dalton Russell is a straight shooter, clearing in control of and executing a thought-out plan.
5. What is the character’s emotional range?
Detective Keith Fraizer slips into an everything is lost moment when a hostage appears to be shot.
Dalton Russell went from calm to a maniac when a hostage lied to him about not having his phone. He snapped and beat the crap out of him.
6. What subtext can the actor play?
Detective Keith Fraizer has a certain level of cockiness to him.
Dalton Russell is shrewd
7. What’s the most interesting relationship this character has?
Detective Keith Fraizer’s relationship with his girlfriend is interesting.
Dalton Russell’s relationship with his girlfriend, his crew member, is interesting.
8. How is this character’s unique voice presence?
Detective Keith Fraizer – Knows he’s in charge but listens to his crew.
Dalton Russell is calm and not out to hurt anyone.
9. What makes this character special and unique?
Detective Keith Fraizer was accused of a crime he swears he didn’t do until the end of the movie.
Dalton Russell stayed true to his word of walking out the front door of the bank to escape.
10. The scene.
Detective Keith Fraizer convinces Dalton to let him in the bank to check on the hostages. On the way out of the bank Keith pulls Dalton down a flight of stairs to get him out of the bank. Keith is met with a rifle to his head from a member of Dalton’s crew. The next scene Keith seems confident and excited by his actions although his partner thinks he is nuts.
Dalton and a child hostage sit in the vault on stacks of cash. Dalton gives the child pizza then views a video game console. The child explains the object of the game. (Grand theft auto, extremely violent) Dalton assures the child everything is going to be okay, then says. I’ll have to talk to your father about this game.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Genre Conventions
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is that simply brainstorming the genre conventions allows simple ideas to enter the mind, making it easy for a first draft to be written.
Title: The emancipation of 1865Concept: The story of a Black American family that migrates from Georgia to Texas after the emancipation proclamation of 1863. Little did they know slavery would not be outlawed in Texas until June 19th, 1865, the day and fight of a lifetime.<div>
Genre: Drama
PURPOSE: To explore stories with emotional and interpersonal high stakes for their characters.
CHARACTER-DRIVEN JOURNEY:
HIGH STAKES COME FROM WITHIN:
EMOTIONALLY RESONATES: CHALLENGING, EMOTIONALLY-CHARGED SITUATIONS:
REAL-LIFE SITUATIONS:
Main Conflict – Brewford fights a ruthless plantation owner attempting to enslave every black American in Texas, before the law to end slavery is recognized nationwide.
Old Ways – Quiet, meek family man, non-confrontational.
New Ways – Skilled warrior, Active on the battlefield, defender of his community. No fear of standing up to his enemies.
Act 1:
Opening – It’s 1863, Brewford travels with his family on a wagon pulled by two horses across the open plains. They arrive at a home in a secluded area and look to settle in, it’s the 1865 Everyone is happy upon arrival and excited to begin their new lives.
Inciting Incident – Four men on horses with guns approach the home harassing them. The men destroy some of the family’s possessions. </div><div>
Turning Point – The men with guns tell Brewford and family they are in Texas now, slavery is not outlawed, and they better leave town. They inform them of Clyde Fordwood plantation as the place they will endup. (Possibly 24 hours)
Act 2:
New plan – Brewfod meets with a few black families living in the same area, to discuss their rights to freedom without harassment. The town members are somewhat fed up with the harassment yet cautious. They decided to seek help from the local sheriff located in the nearest town. </div><div>
Plan in action – A few men along with Brewford’s teenage son ride into town to meet with the sheriff and show freedom papers.
Midpoint Turning Point – While at the meeting, Brewfords son and two other teenage girls are kidnapped by Clyde Fordwood and his men. The sheriff doesn’t intervene. The sheriff pays them no mind considering Clyde is his brother.
Act 3:
Rethink everything – Bewford returns to his neighborhood with news of the incident. He gives a speech about fighting in the war and thinking about his freedom.</div><div>
New plan – The women suggest going to rescue the children with the men. They remind the men that those are their children too.
Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift – while at the meeting Clyde’s men return to the home and murder a child.
Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Brewford and a few men and women ride to the town to rescue the children. A major gun fight happens. </div><div>
Resolution – Brewford’s posse kills Clyde and his men just before the US Marshalls rides into town declaring slavery has been outlawed in the state.
Joaquin
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” 4 Act Transformational Structure
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned doing this assignment is the simple structure of drafting skeletons for a character to grow into. I also learned to remind myself that perfection is not needed at this time.
the following:
Concept – The story of a Black American family that migrates from Georgia to Texas after the emancipation proclamation of 1863. Little did they know slavery would not be outlawed in Texas until June 19th, 1865, the day and fight of a lifetime. <div>
Main Conflict – Brewford fights a ruthless plantation owner attempting to enslave every black American in Texas, before the law to end slavery is recognized nationwide.
Old Ways – Quiet, meek family man, non-confrontational.
New Ways – Skilled warrior, Active on the battlefield, defender of his community. No fear of standing up to his enemies.
Act 1:
Opening – It’s 1863, Brewford travels with his family on a wagon pulled by two horses across the open plains. They arrive at a home in a secluded area and look to settle in, it’s the 1865 Inciting Incident – Four men on horses with guns approach the home harassing them. </div><div>
Turning Point – The men with guns tell Brewford and family they are in Texas now, slavery is not outlawed, and they better leave town. (Possibly 24 hours)
Act 2:
New plan – Brewfod meets with a few black families living in the same area, to discuss their rights to freedom without harassment. They decided to seek help from the local sheriff located in the nearest town. </div><div>
Plan in action – A few men along with Brewford’s teenage son ride into town to meet with the sheriff and show freedom papers.
Midpoint Turning Point – While at the meeting, Brewfords son and two other teenage girls are kidnapped by Clyde Fordwood and his men. The sheriff doesn’t intervene.
Act 3:
Rethink everything – Bewford returns to his neighborhood with news of the incident. </div><div>
New plan – The women suggest going to rescue the children with the men.
Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift – while at the meeting Clyde’s men return to the home and murder a child.
Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Brewford and a few men and women ride to the town to rescue the children. A major gun fight happens. </div><div>
Resolution – Brewford’s posse kills Clyde and his men just before the US Marshalls rides into town declaring slavery has been outlawed in the state.
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Subtext Plot
My vision: for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
“What I learned from doing this assignment is the different types of subtext structure that allows a writer to go beneath the surface to make a screenplay intriguing.
Concept: The story of a Black American family that migrates from Georgia to Texas after the emancipation proclamation of 1863. Little did they know slavery would not be outlawed in Texas until June 19th, 1865, the day and fight of a lifetime.
Subtext plot:
Someone hides who they are
Brewford Dickson is the leader of a military regiment thus allowing him an advantage over the local townsmen.
A major cover up
Clyde Fordwood is covering up the news of the emancipated neighboring states knowing the law will soon change to outlaw slavery in Texas.
Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Transformational Journey
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is, the beginning stages of an outline. This assignment is making the outline process clear and is allowing me to see the roadmap.
Brewford Dickson Character Arc:
Arc Beginning: Docile family man. <div>
Arc Ending: Active defender of a community
Internal/External Journey.
Internal Journey: From a passive man avoiding confrontation to a confident fighter. </div>
External Journey: From a submissive man to a fearless warrior on the battlefield.
Old Ways: soft spoken, not confident in his knowledge of the law, passive.
New Ways: No longer intimidated, active towards justice, strategic planner.
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Intentional Lead Characters
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is, that, the characters MUST stay true to the concept because it drives the story.
Character: Brewford Dickon
Logline: is an emancipated slave and U.S solider who uses his skills to fight off a deranged mob, who wants to force him back into slavery.
Unique: Regiment leader, Blacksmith.
Character: Clyde Fordwood <strong style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>
Logline: is the fiercest plantation owner known in the nation, who will stop at nothing to enslave every black American in the country.
Unique: Horse trainer, He plays the piano before he commits violent actions.
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Joaquin “Ibn Gray’s” Title, Concept, and Character Structure!
My vision for the completion of this class is to write A plus intriguing screenplays that will be produced into extremely profitable movies, which I will cash large checks from.
What I learned from doing this assignment is the different character structures used in writing screenplays.
Title: The Emancipation of 1865
Concept: The story of a Black American family that migrates from Georgia to Texas after the emancipation proclamation in 1863. Little did they know slavery would not be outlawed in Texas until June 19th, 1865, the day and fight of a lifetime.
Protagonist VS. Antagonist
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I Joaquin “Ibn Gray” agree to the terms of this release form.”
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of Writing Incredible Movies, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, through social media, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, videos, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
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Hi
My name is Joaquin “Ibn Gray”
I’ve written three scripts (really 50 plus YEAH I’m including ALL of the drafts)
Well, I hope to gain EVERYTHING Hal and Cheryl want to share about the film writing process. Although I’ve written some stuff (my scripts) before I truly believe when the student is ready the teacher/s will appear. I’m so ready.
Let’s see something unique about me. What can I say other than I’m a writer! Cliche? Okay I started my first screenplay (texting) thumbing in the notes app of my iPhone, in 2019 while on a business trip with my wife. I had no idea what I was doing nor did I know that I would soon fall deep in love with writing.
Joaquin
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Lesson 3: Assignment 1
SHOW: LOST
A. Role in the show:
In my observation Kates character is satisfying the role of the Antagonist, meaning she is the bad girl. I say this from a typical traditional way of thinking.
B. Unique Purpose / Expertise:
She is a fugitive; we see her hand cuffed sitting next to a US Marshall on the plane.
C. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface?
She has walked 100Km across the Australian continent to a particular farm. What made her pick that farm? The bounty over her head of Twenty-three thousand suggest she has done something extreme. Also, the US Marshall has tracked her internationally. Her crime must be big.
D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing?
Although, while being chased, she causes a car accident, putting her own life in danger to avoid being captured by the Marshall, she saves the driver.
She suggests murdering the Marshall, obviously so she won’t have to face the punishment of what she is accused of.
E. Unpredictable: What will they do next?
I really have no idea what Kate is going to do next. She might flip out on the guy that shot the Marshall. Will she be sad by his death? Is she going to have break down because she is stuck on the island?
F. Empathetic: Why do we care?
I think we care about Kate because we saw her compassionated side. She wanted the Farmer to receive the reward for turning her in. She walked out of the tent sad. She also makes an attempt to tell Jack what she has done, but he stops her. There is a soft heart somewhere in her.
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Assignment 2
Subject: Joaquin Gray’s Three circles of characters
What I learned doing this assignment is that the story’s journey is the most important thing. The characters will come and go however being true to the journey will take you the furthest.
Mian Characters: Amanda Read – sophisticated, scholastic.
Louis Johnson – Comedic, witty
Paul Landmark – Romantic, slob
Pam Genworth (twin) – Down to earth, realist.
Connected Characters: Jennifer Waltlick – social media savvy, silly
Khalil Muhammad – Quiet, Shrewd
Mary Genworth (twin) – Stuck up, Airhead
Environmental characters: Christopher Hernandaz – quietly moves throughout unnoticed. carries a small notebook
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Assignment 1:
Subject Lost Assignment Character Circles
Main Characters: Jack, Kate, Charlie, Sayed
Connected Characters: The US Marshall, The man who plays backgammon, The gunman
<font face=”inherit”> Shannon & brother, Black lady next to Jack on the plane, Hurly, Walt & Father, </font>Pregnant lady, The Asian couple, Viciente
Environment Characters: The flight crew, Polar Bear, Sound in the jungle, Voice over the radio.
I have a question.
Is this forum a place for questions?
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ASSIGNMENT: <strong style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Subject line: (TV Show title) 5 Star Model
I chose LOST.
Big Picture Hooks:
The main character Jack wakes up with greenery surrounding him. He is clearly in a strange place due to his attire. A suit. Out of nowhere a dog crosses his path. Jack makes his way to the shore of a beach to discover the wreckage of a plane crash and several people in a panic. Upon seeing this I became concerned.
Amazing and Intriguing Character:<div>
I counted 19 characters which were introduced to us over a 42-minute period. Jack a doctor is clearly attempting to help everyone he physically can. A man stuck under a wing, a pregnant lady, a lady receiving CPR incorrectly. This guy springs right into action. Go Jack.
During the chaos we are introduced to other characters. A few have one-two liners of dialog some don’t have dialog at all. Thier expressions give us a clue as to who they may be. This stressful situation was a great way of introducing them because it brings out their genuine feelings. I personally empathized with everyone. I would never want to be in a situation like that. A plane crash. When Jack settled down and noticed his own injury, it hit me. Then along came Kate. She patched him up and their journey began.
Open loops:
Charlie has my antennas up. He looks sneaky. Is he the cause of the crash? During a flashback in act ii, Charlie runs across the screen, follow by two crew members. Then BAAM the plane begins falling from the sky. More tension. Our emotions are on a roller-coaster up and down. Another stressful moment. I noticed the cool after the storm because the next shot was the calm ocean waves. Nice way of relaxing the audience.
Do Kate and Jack fall in love?
What are the names of the characters that didn’t speak?
Is the dog’s name Vincent? I heard the boy mention Vincent.
What the hell is the thing in the jungle making the noise? oh that’s the twentieth character.
I noticed the use of questions to provide us with information. Example the pilot asked Jack how long have we been down?
Where did the flight originate from?
What was the destination?
What are they going to do about food besides go fishing?
When will the lady go into labor?
Will the Asian couple split up and join everyone else?
I think all of these questions create the need to see every episode especially with the ending line of dialogue from Charlie. How does something like that happen?
Ask this: How does this pilot create the need to see every single episode?
</div>
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FADE IN:
INT. SCREENWRITING FORUM – DAY
The ADMINISTRATOR, posts an assignment to the GROUP MEMBERS. For some reason the forum feels like an AA meeting, almost like therapy. JOAQUIN GRAY A.K.A IBN GRAY sits at his desk pondering the questions. THE VOICE IN IBN GRAY’S HEAD blurts out.
THE VOICE IN IBN GRAY’S HEAD
Are you sure you?
Joaquin Gray scratches his head maintaining a reserved look upon his face.
JOAQUIN
Hhhhhmmmm!
THE VOICE IN IBN GRAY’S HEAD (V.O)
Don’t over think it! You’ve got four questions.
JOAQUIN (reserved)
Let’s see. What if I…
THE VOICE IN IBN GRAY’S HEAD (V.O)
What if you just answer the questions?
JOAQUIN
Hi everyone. My name is Joaquin Gray A.K.A Ibn Gray.
A few group members chime. “Hi, hello.”
GROUP MEMBER #1
Hi Joaquin.
THE VOICE IN IBN GRAY’S HEAD (V.O)
There’s always one.
Joaquin smiles.
JOAQUIN
I started writing screenplays two years ago. If you count all of the drafts, rewrites, you know. I’ve written over let’s say 75 scripts.
THE VOICE IN IBN GRAY’S HEAD (V.0)
Who cares about rewrites?
JOAQUIN
Well I only copywrote, copywrite. I have three copywritten.
What do I hope to get out of this class?
THE VOICE IN IBN GRAY’S HEAD (V.0)
TELL ‘EM THE TRUTH. YOU’RE IN IT FOR THE MONEY.
GROUP MEMBER #2
I’m here for the BIG BUCKS.
The group members laugh. The administrator clears their throat.
ADMINISTRATOR
Please continue.
JOAQUIN
Well, I hope to learn everything I can to improve my craft. I want to learn everything you have to offer and are willing to share and meet a few good people on the journey too.
ADMINISTRATOR
Fantastic Joaquin. Alright…
GROUP MEMBER #1
You forgot something unique, something special about yourself.
JOAQUIN
Oh, yeah. Thanks. I’m a writer and we are special unique people.
THE VOICE IN IBN GRAY’S HEAD (V.O)
You just had to make a scene.
ADMINISTRATOR
True indeed. Alright everyone let’s turn our attention to…
Joaquin sits at his desk fingers on his keyboard, smiling.
JOAQUIN (V.0)
Should I hit post?
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Joaquin Gray
I agree to the terms of the Agreement.
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
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I love your vision. I hope it manifest for you. We need that!