John Vanis
Forum Replies Created
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John’s Marketing Campaign
What I learned doing this assignment is that one must have a well written script, pitch and query letter before we embark on the next part of our journey… the marketing campaign. Having the proper tools and a thought out plan are integral.
Plan of action:
Marketing campaign #6
Marketing to producers.
I got IMDbPro.
I have already pitched my concept to a producer. A small one but it’s a start. He was intrigued and asked for my script.
I’m reviewing my script and applying the notes I’ve learned from this class. I’m going to give him the revised script ASAP.
I want to thank Hal and Cheryl for a great class and I wish you all well. If any of you want to stay in contact, my email is johnvanis@hotmail.com.
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John’s Query Letter Draft ONE
What I hope to learn…. I will take any and all criticism. I am here to learn and I’m treating this opportunity as if a producer gave me notes on my script. I will not get angry or upset. So, have at it. Besides, I have two tubs of ice cream in the freezer, lol.
Dear Producer,
Title: Potty Mouths
Genre: Comedy
Imagine an R-rated version of “Look Who’s Talking.”
As the moms leave for a bachelorette party, we hear the curse-filled thoughts of two infants, Billy and Abby, as they are left with their inexperienced dads, Michael and David, for five days.
After never being alone with his son longer than a couple of hours, Michael develops fear and anxiety prior to the task ahead. David, on the other hand, tries to install a stricter brand of parenting to Abby but she’s accustom to her mother’s easy-going ways.
Making things more complicated, Michael’s father, who he hasn’t talked to for some time, comes to help. Later, we find out it was Michael’s wife, Sarah, who called him over to help creating tension between the couple. Also, Michael’s friend, Charlie, continues pressuring Michael to reminisce the old days and party with him in Sarah’s absence. It eventually comes to a turning point when Charlie puts Billy in an unorthodox situation potentially altering Michael’s and Charlie’s friendship forever.
It all boils down to Michael and David taking control of fatherhood and giving it their own unique touch.
If you like my concept, I’d be happy to send you a copy of my script.
John Vanis
(Contact info)
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John’s Target Market
What I learned doing this assignment is to do my due diligence. Research is key. Also, the movies I chose have similarities to mine but they have a budget four times larger. I assume it’s because of the talent.
Title: Potty Mouths
Genre: Comedy
Logline: After the moms leave for a bachelorette party, we hear the curse filled thoughts of two infants as they are left with their inexperienced dads for five days.
Similar movies : Bad moms, Good boys, Blockers, Superbad and Look who’s talking.
Actors for Michael: Jesse Plemons, Scott Eastwood, Liam Hemsworth, Nicholas Hoult, Thomas Felton
Actors for David: Jonathan Majors, Tyler James Williams, Dayo Okeniyi
Actors for Baby Billy’s voiceover: Seth Rogen, Mark Wallberg, Paul Rudd, Jason Segel
Actors for Baby Abby’s: Tiffany Tiffany Haddish, Regina King, Leslie Jones, Maya Rudolph
List of producers:
Bad Moms: Oren Aviv, Bill Block, Adam Fogelson, Mark Kamine, Robert Simonds, Daniel Tang, Suzanne Todd, Zhongjun Wang, Zhonglei Wang, Jerry Ye
Good Boys: Lee Eisenberg, Josh Fagen, Brady Fujikawa, Evan Goldberg, Nathan Kahane, John Powers Middleton, Seth Rogen, James Weaver, John Phillips, Dan Clarke, Kelli Konop
Blockers: Chris Cowles, Joe Drake, Josh Fagen, Chris Fenton, Evan Goldberg, David Stassen, Nathan Kahane, Jon Hurwitz, Jonathan McCoy, Seth Rogen, Hayden Schlossberg, James Weaver, Kelli Konop, Spencer Wong, Ariel Shaffir, Kyle Hunter, Brady Fujikawa, Joseph Amarel
Superbad: Evan Goldberg, Judd Apatow, Seth Rogen, Shaune Robertson, Dara Weintraub
Look Who’s Talking (reboot): Adam Fields
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John’s Phone Pitch
What I learned doing this assignment is to do my due diligence in finding the right producer for the script I have.
I’m leading with a combo of title and high concept.
“Hi. I’m John Vanis and I was wondering if I could run a quick pitch by you?”
After a dozen tries, I get some producer to say ‘yes.’
“I wrote a comedy called ‘Potty Mouths.’ It’s an R -rated version of ‘Look who’s talking.”
“What’s your budget?”
“It’s low budget. $3-$5 million.
“Who do you see playing some of the roles?”
“For Baby Billy’s voiceover, I see someone like Mark Wahlberg, Paul Rudd or Seth Rogen. For Baby Abby’s voiceover, I see Tiffany Haddish, Leslie Jones or Regina King.”
“How long is your script?”
“98 pages.”
“Who else has seen it?”
“Right now, just you.”
“Why do you think it fits our company?”
[If I were in contact with Point Grey Pictures.]
“Because your company was behind the R-rated comedies ‘Neighbors, Good Boys and Blockers.”
“How does the movie end?”
“It ends with Michael and David taking control of their roles of being a dad. Sarah comes home from her trip and tells Michael and her son Billy that she’s pregnant.”
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John’s Pitch Fest Pitch
What I learned is the key points to crafting a great pitch. Be brief, to the point and be prepared to answer any questions.
Hi. I’m John Vanis and I previously co-wrote an independent film titled “Everyday.” Today, for you, I have a comedy called “Potty Mouths.” We hear the curse filled thoughts of two infants as they are left with their inexperienced dads for five days. Simply put, it’s an R-rated version of “Look Who’s Talking.”
Budget range- It’s a low budget project between $1 – $5 million.
For Baby Billy’s voice over I was thinking between Paul Rudd, Jason Segel or Mark Wahlberg.
For Baby Abby’s voice over I was thinking between Tiffany Haddish, Leslie Jones or Regina King.
Act 1 opens with the moms planning and going to the bachelorette party. It leaves infants Billy and Abby with their inexperienced dads, Michael and David.
In Act 2, we see the struggles of fatherhood for both Michael and David as we hear the frustrations and criticism from their babies. Adding to the stress, Michael’s father comes to give his input in parenting and Michael’s friend, Charlie, keeps pressuring him to party it up like their college days.
In Act 3, after a scare that sends Billy to the ER and David compromises on his parenting methods, Michael and David take control of their roles of being a father.
It ends with Michaels wife, Sarah, coming home from her trip and tells Michael and Billy that she’s pregnant. Hearing that he’s going to have a sibling, Billy says his first word – “Fuck.”
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John’s Query Letter
What I learned doing this assignment is that the query letter has to be brief, intriguing and generate excitement.
Dear Producer,
Title: Potty Mouths
Genre: Comedy
Imagine an R-rated version of “Look Who’s Talking.”
As the moms leave for a bachelorette party, we hear the point of view of two infants, Billy and Abby, as they are left with their inexperienced dads, Michael and David, for five days.
Michael has fear and anxiety of being alone with his son. David tries to install a stricter brand of parenting to Abby but she’s accustom to her mother’s easy-going ways.
Making things more complicated, Michael’s father, who he hasn’t talked to for some time, comes to help. Later, we find out it was Michael’s wife, Sarah, who called him over to help creating tension between the couple. Also, Michael’s friend, Charlie, continues pressuring Michael to reminisce the old days and party with him. It eventually comes to a turning point when Charlie puts Billy in an unorthodox situation.
It all boils down to Michael and David taking control of fatherhood and giving it their own unique touch.
If you like my concept, I’d be happy to send you a copy of my script.
John Vanis
(Contact info)
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John’s Synopsis Hooks
What I learned doing this assignment is to use the COM and MIT to create a to-the-point synopsis.
COM
Potty Mouths – short and catchy title
Comedy with a wide audience appeal.
MIT
Unique hero – Michael gets anxiety when he’s left alone with his son.
Villain- Charlie still likes to party it up.
Major hook- We hear the thoughts of Billy and Abby.
Twist- Michael, who hasn’t spoken with his dad for some time, comes to help.
Reversals- Michael snaps at Charlie for potentially putting his son Billy in harms way.
Character betrayal- When Michael finds out it was his wife who called his father to help.
Title: Potty Mouths
Genre: Comedy
Can you imagine if we heard what infants were thinking? Now, imagine it R-rated.
As the moms leave for a bachelorette party, we hear the point of view of two infants, Billy and Abby, as they are left with their inexperienced dads, Michael and David, for five days.
Michael has fear and anxiety of being alone with his son. David tries to install a stricter brand of parenting to Abby but she’s accustom to her mother’s easy-going ways.
Making things more complicated, Michael’s father, who he hasn’t talked to for some time, comes to help. Later, we find out it was Michael’s wife, Sarah, who called him over to help creating tension between the couple. Also, Michael’s friend, Charlie, continues pressuring Michael to reminisce the old days and party with him. It eventually comes to a turning point when Charlie puts Billy in an unorthodox situation.
It all boils down to Michael and David taking control of fatherhood and giving it their own unique touch.
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John’s High Concept/ Elevator Pitch
What I learned doing this assignment is, for your script to even be considered, your first impression is extremely important in delivering a tight yet appealing concept and elevator pitch.
High concept
Can you imagine if babies could talk what would they say… especially if they were pissed!
OR
Imagine an R-rated version of “Look who’s talking.”
Elevator Pitch
After the moms leave for a bachelorette party, we hear the curse filled thoughts of two infants as they are left with their inexperienced dads for five dads.
… I recently got in contact with a producer. I told him I wrote a comedy called “Potty Mouths.” It’s a R-rated version of “Look who’s talking.” And I followed it with the elevator pitch. He liked it a lot and asked to read the script when my edit is finished. Let’s see where it goes.
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John’s 10 most interesting things
What I learned from this assignment is that I actually had to go back and rewrite some of my script to fill these points. Adding and improving those hooks have made my script more marketable. Great assignment, Hal.
10 most interesting things
A. Unique hero: Michael gets anxiety when he is left alone with his infant son.
Unique villain: Charlie, the 31 year old who thinks he’s 21, believes that his ‘married with children,’ buddies still want to party like he does.
B. Major hook of opening scene: Babies/infants have their own language and they understand each other. Some parents have an insight to what their kids need (the mother) while some parents don’t (the father).
We hear Billy explaining how he doesn’t understand how he came into existence from (we cut to his parents having wild sex in the bedroom) … this.
C. Any turning points: Michael mans up when there is an emergency with his son. He takes control and rushes him to the hospital.
D. Emotional dilemma: Michael has never had to take care of his son for an extended period of time before. Sarah has never left her son alone for that long of a time. Billy is going through breastfeeding withdrawal.
E. Major twist: Michael, who hasn’t spoken with his father for some time, comes to help.
F. Reversals: Michael snaps at Charlie for potentially putting Billy in harms way.
G. Character betrayals: When Michael finds out it was his wife who called Michael’s father to help him out.
H. Any big surprises: At the end, Sarah reveals she’s pregnant. Sequel.
Other things that could interest a producer:
It’s a low budget script.
The comedic elements:
Michael shaves his chest thinking his son might need to suck on his nipple to stop crying.
Charlie invites strippers to Michael’s house and Billy thinks it’s a buffet.
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John Vanis Producer/ Manager
Producer
I will give the producer my brief pitch by giving the genre, title and hook and I’ll let them take it in. I will take any questions and notes that they may have as well as criticism and ideas to make it more marketable and budget friendly. And I will not get angry or defensive from their criticism or changes. Like them, I want to get the movie made and for all parties to make money.
Manager
I will give the manager the same brief pitch that I gave to the producer with the genre, title and hook. I would mention that I have written two other scripts and that I have many other concepts that I am developing. I would definitely accept writing assignments. Making a career out of being a screenwriter is something that I would strongly emphasize.
What I learned today is that I have to be understanding of the different needs of both producer and manager and they each have a specific formula that I must use in my approach.
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John Vanis’ Marketable Components
What I learned today is that marketable components are the first thing to attract a producers attention. It is what they need to see if a project can make them money. I am a writer that should think like a producer!
Current logline – We hear the vulgar, inner thoughts of two infants as they are left with their inexperience dads for five days.
Components of Marketability
B) Title – Potty Mouths. I think it’s to the point and catchy. Some kids do have a potty mouth. Can you imagine what a fussy infant would say if they could talk?
G) Wide audience appeal – Yes. Parents new and old can relate to the story.
H) Adapted from a popular book- It might not be popular but it was spawned from my picture book.
I) Similarity to box office success-
Look who’s talking
Bad moms
Good boys
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John Vanis Project and Market
1) Genre: Comedy
Title: Potty Mouths
Concept: We hear the vulgar, inner thoughts of two infants as they are left with their inexperienced dads for five days.
Comps: It’s an R-rated version of “Look Who’s Talking.”
2) I think new and experienced parents can relate to this story.
3) I’m first targeting producers that do comedies. More specifically Screen Gems since they’re trying to make a Look Who’s Talking reboot and Point Grey Pictures since they were behind projects like Good Boys and Blockers. This story has a wide market appeal and the budget should be low. (Depending on talent, of course.)
4) What I learned today is that it is relevant to develop a strong marketing campaign to help sell my script.
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Hello, everyone. My name is John Vanis.
I have written 4 screenplays and I hope to write many more. I have written an adult picture book with a second one coming soon. My ideas are in the style of “Go the Fuck to Sleep.” This past year, I have started a production company with two film buddies of mine and we are working on developing movies, TV shows, comedy shows and web series.
I do have a legal question I’d like to ask about my picture book. There is an app called “Painnt.” You can make your photos look like a sketch, cartoon, painted, etc. Could I publish those altered photos in my book without any legal ramifications? Any and all feedback is appreciated.
I look forward to getting to know all of you and to be a part of this community.
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John Vanis
I agree to the terms of this release form.
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Cara, thank you very much for your comments! I appreciate the positive feedback as well as the suggestions to improve it.
The babies are not narrating the movie. We hear a voiceover of their thoughts.
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Phyllis, thank you for taking your time to read my letter. I appreciate the comments! Time to go back and make the right adjustments.
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Hi Phyllis,
First of all, just reading your bio has me interested in your script. Great credentials. Being a rookie, I have a lot to learn from many of you in this class. Anyways, here are my two cents regarding your letter.
I would start off with a hook to entice the producer. I would break up your opening paragraph into two to have more white space. Also, I don’t know how necessary it is to keep the budget paragraph.
Best of luck to you.
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Hi Thomas,
Great hook. But I would just keep it as The Rocky of Hockey. If I were a producer, that would grab me right away. Otherwise, I thought your letter went smoothly. I do agree with Mark about mentioning that you already had meetings with different companies. That’s a plus in my eyes. Good luck to you.