[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra Finished Act 2

What I learned doing this assignment is that the high speed process is the way to go! While writing my second act, I realized that one of the previous scene in the first act didn’t need to be introduced this early. I just went back to that scene and deleted the few paragraphs where the character appeared. Fortunately, I had not spent any time writing those paragraphs.

Rate your use so far on each of the High Speed Writing Rules:

• A. Consistently use.
• B. Some use.
• C. Need to start using.

• B for Rule 1: Use empowering self talk. Cheer yourself on.
• A for Rule 2: Understand writing in drafts.
• B for Rule 3: Choose speed over quality for EARLY drafts.
• B for Rule 4: Allow yourself to start (or continue) without all the answers.
• B for Rule 5: Keep moving. Don’t allow yourself to ever stall out.
• A for Rule 6: Even if you can’t create it now, you will be able to at some point in the future!

The insight I had was that I can keep working on high speed writing even when I’m tired because I don’t care about quality. This makes me be more productive. Before, I thought I needed to be in my best possible shape to write because everything I had to right needed to be the best I could write.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra Finished Act 1 First Draft

What I learned doing this assignment is that I had forgotten a lot of characters so that my screenplay make sense. I had to come up with a bunch of new characters really quickly.

I have not mastered the technique of high speed writing yet. Looking forward to practice more with Act 2. The one scene where I applied all the techniques was my favorite to write so I know that it works.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Teaser / High Speed Writing

What I learned doing this assignment is that if we follow the rules of high speed writing it’s much easier to stay “in the zone” and it’s very encouraging to see how many pages we can write in only a couple of hours.

I wrote my 5-page teaser and I had many breakthroughs by disciplining myself to stay in “creative mode”.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Outline With Intrigue

What I learned doing this assignment is that a scene need at least two of those intrigue components to be justified in a script.

Complete your outline:

TEASER

1. EXT. FOREST TRAIL – NIGHT: HIDDEN AGENDA

The moon casts a soft glow over the forest trail as Urnek, Gunthor, Dusty, and his wife, their spirits buoyed by a successful mining expedition, jovially return home. Their laughter and the melodies of an Irish tune fill the night air until a seemingly insurmountable fallen tree obstructs their path. At the base of the tree, a Little Girl appears injured and helpless, drawing their immediate attention and concern.

As the group cautiously approaches, intent on offering aid, the air suddenly thickens with tension. The “injured” girl transforms into Mash, a mischievous and malevolent Grimlope (half-man, half-coyote), marking the beginning of a well-orchestrated ambush. From the shadows, more Grimlopes emerge, encircling the miners.

The peaceful night erupts into chaos. Urnek, Gunthor, and Dusty, realizing the gravity of their predicament, draw their weapons in defiance, ready to protect their hard-earned treasures. A fierce battle ensues, the clashing of swords and the shouts of men breaking the forest’s tranquility. Yet, in the heat of battle, a horrifying discovery is made: Dusty and his wife are nowhere to be found.

• Open Loop: Will Urnek and his comrade fight off the grimlopes so that they don’t steal the gold? What happened to the mineworkers? Where were they taken?
• Mystery: Why did the grimlopes abduct the mineworkers?
• Empathy/Distress: Betrayal: Mash disguises himself as a helpless little girl to ambush Urnek, Gunthor and the mineworkers. Plans that failed: Urnek and Gunthor successfully protected the gold but failed to protect the mineworkers who were abducted.
• Irony: The usually greedy grimlopes ignored the riches and abducted the miners instead.
• Setup: Dusty and his wife are Ben’s parents, a character we will meet later.

ACT 1

2. INT. FORGE – DAY: IMMINENT THREAT

• Start: Ronan working in the forge.
• Challenging Situation: A scout reports a mysterious threat.
• Conflict: The village needs to be warned.
• Action: Ronan instructs the scout to ring the alarm, but the scene focuses on his work.
• Finish: Ronan prepares for battle, signalling a shift to defensive readiness.

In the heart of the village, the forge’s fires burn brightly as Ronan, the master blacksmith, pounds at a piece of metal with determined strokes. Suddenly, the forge’s rhythmic sounds are interrupted by the hurried entrance of a scout, breathless and wide-eyed with urgency. “He’s coming down the mountain,” the scout reports.

He instructs the scout to alert the village, then abandons his work, shifting from creation to preparation for combat, signaling a community on the brink of defense.

• Open Loop: What is the threat?
• Mystery: The motions of getting ready for the threat seem to be well-rehearsed. How often does this happen?
• Empathy/Distress: It’s Ronan’s responsibility to protect the village against this imminent threat.
• Irony: The blacksmith is in charge of calling the shots instead of a military commander.
• Setup: This imminent threat will come back in the near future.

3.EXT. BRIDGE, ONE MILE OUTSIDE STONEVALE VILLAGE – MORNING: INTRIGUING WORLD

The serene waters near Stonevale Village ripple gently as two fishermen cast their lines into the river, hoping for a bountiful catch. Their morning tranquility is soon overshadowed by the swift and silent approach of Nayeli. Without disturbing the fishermen’s quiet solitude, she draws her bow, eyes fixed on the water.

In one fluid motion, arrows fly from her bowstring, each finding its mark with precision as fish are plucked from the water and pinned to the riverbank. The fishermen, momentarily distracted by this unexpected display, watch in disbelief as Nayeli effortlessly outmatches their morning’s efforts in mere moments.

As she retrieves her catch, the contrast between her skill and their traditional methods is stark. The fishermen, now fully aware of Nayeli’s prowess, can only look on in silent admiration as she gathers her bounty and heads towards the market.

• Open Loop: How will Nayeli use her formidable archery skills in the future?
• Mystery: Where is Nayeli from?
• Empathy/Distress: An imminent threat is on its way and those three characters are outside the walls. Are they in danger?

4. EXT. STONEVALE’S GATE – MORNING: IMMINENT THREAT

Nayeli approaches the fortified gates of Stonevale, just as the alarm resounds, stirring panic. The fishermen scurry past her, easily admitted by the guards due to their familiar faces. Nayeli, marked as a stranger, is stopped; her bow and arrows are confiscated. With a heavy thud, the gates close behind her.

• Open Loop: What is Nayeli looking for going from town to town?
• Mystery: Why were such high walls built for a little town like Stonevale?
• Empathy/Distress: Nayeli is stripped from her weapon when a threat is on its way.
• Payoff: The alarm Ronan called for in the previous scene goes off here.
• Setup: Nayeli travels alone? What is she looking for?

5. EXT. STONEVALE WALLS – MORNING: IMMINENT THREAT

• Start: A Golem attacks the village.
• Challenging Situation: The village’s defenses are tested.
• Conflict: Urnek plays hero against protocol.
• Action: Combat unfolds; Urnek charges ahead and is swatted down by the Golem.
• Finish: The immediate threat is repelled, but Urnek’s injury raises concerns about heroism and recklessness.

A monstrous Golem, born from earth and dark magics, begins its relentless assault on the village walls. The villagers, roused from their homes, watch in horror as this behemoth of stone and malice advances. Among them, Ronan and Mirelle stand ready, an unlikely duo brought together by the dire circumstances.

Urnek, with a warrior’s heart and an impulsive spirit, sees this as his moment to shine. Ignoring the calls for caution, he rushes forward, a lone figure against a towering adversary. His bravery, though admirable, is quickly met with the Golem’s overpowering strength. A swift, powerful blow sends him crashing to the ground.

The battle rages on, but with Urnek’s fall, the village’s resolve hardens. Ronan and Mirelle, through a combination of craft and arcane prowess, manage to turn the tide, repelling the Golem’s attack.

• Open Loop: What consequences will Urnek face for disobeying orders?
• Mystery: Where does the golem come from?
• Empathy/Distress: Mirelle and Ronan
• Payoff: The imminent threat is a golem.
• Irony: A blacksmith and a sorceress did all the work while the warriors watched from the sidelines.

ACT 2

6. EXT. PUBLIC MARKET – MORNING: HIDDEN LAYER

Nayeli stands at the heart of Stonevale’s bustling morning market, her catch of fish attracting the attention of passersby and merchants alike. She engages with a sly trader, known for his crafty dealings, who praises her skills while simultaneously underpaying for her bountiful catch. Nayeli, aware yet unfazed by the unfair transaction, continues to sell her fish.

As the morning wears on, Nayeli finds herself with a single fish left. Spotting Ben, a young boy with wide, hopeful eyes, she hands him the last fish. The boy flees with his newfound treasure without saying thank you.

• Open Loop: Will Nayeli meet this boy again? What strange power did the merchant have to get Nayeli to agree with his price?
• Mystery: Who is this homeless boy?
• Empathy/Distress: A homeless boy is ready to steal for food. Nayeli feeds him before he attempts anything.
• Payoff: The fish she caught at the pond were to sell to the market
• Setup: The peculiar way the merchant is negotiating will be explained later.

7. EXT. CANNON SITE – MORNING: MYSTERY

Ronan’s work on a massive cannon is disrupted by a playful skirmish with Urnek, leading to an accidental discovery of a mysterious oil that animates metal. This chaotic revelation opens the door to unforeseen dangers and the vast potential of their discovery.

• Open Loop: What unique properties does this mysterious oil has?
• Mystery: What are the origins of this oil?
• Empathy/Distress: Undeserved misfortune: Ronan’s peaceful life as a blacksmith is upended by the discovery of the magical oil. Brings their would present: When Urnek argues with Ronan, the blacksmith reminds Urnek that he might be too dumb to understand the concept of strategic defenses.
• Irony: The blacksmith who fears magic is the one who discovers a magical oil source.
• Setup: Rivalry between Ronan and Urnek. How will this end? Where does the magical oil come from?

ACT 3

8. EXT. ELEMENTARY SCHOOL – DAY: INTRIGUING WORLD

The final bell rings, heralding the start of summer as children burst from the elementary school with unrestrained joy. Amidst this scene of youthful exuberance, Cody finds his father, Ronan, waiting. Together, they begin their walk home through the village’s lively streets. Cody bubbles with excitement, recounting Urnek’s valiant efforts against the Golem, his admiration for the warrior’s bravery palpable in his animated retelling.

Ronan listens, a smile playing on his lips, yet his eyes betray a hint of concern. The tale of heroism sparks a silent contemplation within him about the virtues of bravery versus the necessity of wisdom and caution. As they pass by Mirelle’s tower, the unspoken divide between Ronan’s reliance on tradition and the untapped potential of magic.

• Open Loop: What is the 12th birthday birthday ceremony they are talking about?
• Mystery: What happened to Ronan so that he despises magic so much?
• Empathy/Distress: Cody is more in admiration with Urnek’s temerity than with how his dad successfully defended the village.
• Irony: Mirelle and Toran fought the golem side by side but now, they’re not even acknowledging each other’s presence.

9. EXT. MIRELLE’S TOWER – DAY: WOUND

Mirelle is confronted with a drawing from a child that cruelly depicts her as a witch, highlighting her isolation and the village’s fear. This moment of personal hurt reflects the broader misunderstanding and prejudices she faces within Stonevale.

• Mystery: Why are the kids afraid of Mirelle?
• Empathy/Distress: Brings their wound present: When the school kid shows Mirelle the drawing of kids being afraid of her, it opens her wound that she cannot have children of her own.
• Irony: The kids are terrified of someone who just saved the village.

10. INT. RONAN’S FORGE – DAY: WOUND

Inside the forge, where the heat of the fire meets the cool resolve of the blacksmith, Ronan and Cody engage in a pivotal conversation about the future. Cody, standing amidst the remnants of his childhood, expresses a mature, thoughtful desire to give away his toys, symbolizing his readiness to leave childhood behind.

When mentioning the ceremony organized for Cody’s 12th birthday, the day he will officially become an artisan, his lack of motivation worries Ronan.

• Mystery: Why doesn’t Cody want to follow his parents’ footsteps? What happened to Ronan’s wife?
• Empathy/Distress: When Ronan’s son doesn’t show excitement to turn 12 and start his apprenticeship as an artisan, it saddens Ronan.
• Setup: All the toys he gives away will have a significant importance in future episodes.

11. INT. RONAN’S FORGE – NIGHT: MYSTERY

Ronan shows Mirelle the animate oil. Her experiment culminates in the animation of a metal beetle, a gift Ronan had give his late wife, a marvel of movement and life sparked from inanimate metal.

The beetle flies across the forge. Ronan, faced with the undeniable reality of their creation, makes a swift decision. With a decisive movement, he crushes the beetle, extinguishing the life they had just sparked. His proclamation against further experimentation echoes in the forge, a line drawn firmly in the sand.

• Open Loop: What are the implications of having a magical oil that can animate metal? Will Mirelle listen to Ronan and stop all experimentations on the oil?
• Mystery: Why can’t Mirelle have any children?
• Empathy/Distress: Forced Decision: When Ronan finds the magical oil, he feels he doesn’t have a choice to report it to Mirelle, even though it’s the last thing he wants to do.
• Payoff: Mirelle explains the properties of the oil Ronan found.
• Irony: Ronan destroys a gift his late wife gave him because Mirelle had turned it into a magical living thing.

ACT 4

12. INT. NAYELI’S TENT – EVENING: HIDDEN LAYER

Note: Maybe put half this scene between 10 and 11.

Under the cloak of evening, Nayeli meticulously sets up her tent at the edge of Stonevale. She hears a kid’s laugh in the shadows but doesn’t find anything when she decides to investigate.

When she comes back to her camp, she finds Ben, the boy she met at the market. As they share a simple meal, Ben, encouraged by Nayeli’s attentive silence, recounts the harrowing tale of his parents’ abduction by Grimlopes. Nayeli has so many questions for him about the secrets of the town.

• Open Loop: What are the gifts and curses of each stone? Where does the mysterious laugh come from?
• Mystery: Why have so many mineworkers been abducted?
• Empathy/Distress: Major loss: The first two mineworkers are abducted at the beginning of the pilot. Now, 3 months later, it’s a dozen of mineworkers that are missing.
• Payoff: We learn who the boy is and why he’s homeless.
• Setup: Nayeli sees something lurking in the shadows and hears a kid laughing? What is it? Ben reveals the power and curse of his stone. This raises the question, what are the powers and the curses of the other stones?

13. INT. COUNCIL ROOM – EVENING: CONSPIRACY

In the solemn quietude of the council room, the ten elders of Stonevale gather around an ancient table littered with maps and scrolls. The gravity of their discussion focuses on fortifying the village against the looming threats.

They put together the information they have and find out where the mineworkers are being taken. Mirelle explains that a legend mentions that an magical explosive matter can be found in those mountains.

The elders, deep in debate, resolve to bolster the defenses around the mineworkers, and to send scouts to find the locations of the ones that are missing. Yet, their unawareness of the bat’s silent vigil speaks to the vulnerability that shadows their best-laid plans.

• Open Loop: How will the explosive matter be used to attack the village? Will the scouts find the missing mineworkers?
• Empathy/Distress: Someone is spying on the council meetings. No secrets can be kept safe anymore.
• Payoff: We learn how the perpetrator knows their every move.
• Irony: The place where secrets are supposed to be kept safe is the one being spied on.
• Setup: The bat will be used in multiple future episodes.

14. INT. DRUID’S CHAMBER – EVENING: HIDDEN AGENDA

In the dimly lit confines of the druid’s chamber, Sylvanor, with a countenance carved from malice and ambition, convenes with his loyal Grimlopes, Torgan and Mash. The chamber, a sanctum of dark plans and darker magics, echoes with their conspiratorial tones. Sylvanor unfurls a detailed map of Stonevale, his finger tracing the paths of invasion, his eyes alight with the fire of impending conquest. In seven days, he vows, Stonevale will come under the shadow of his might.

• Open Loop: Will Sylvanor’s forces overcome Stonevale’s defenses?
• Mystery: Why does Sylvanor need all of the Stonevale’s mineworkers?
• Empathy/Distress: The villagers of Gemvale are in great danger.
• Payoff: We confirm that Sylvanor is the one behind the attack in the teaser.
• Irony:
• Setup: Sylvanor prepares his army for an eventual attack.

ACT 5

15. EXT. GATE – NIGHT: HIDDEN LAYER

The night of Cody’s twelfth birthday brings a solemn and age-old tradition to life in the shadow of Stonevale’s imposing gate. The village gathers in a semi-circle, a collective breath held in anticipation, as Ronan, Cody, and the esteemed artisans stand at the forefront of this ancestral ceremony. The gate, usually a symbol of protection and boundary, tonight marks the threshold of Cody’s transition from childhood to the responsibilities waiting on the cusp of his twelfth year.

With the first stars of the evening as their witness, Cody is given the honor to step outside the village gate one final time as a child.

As Cody returns, crossing back into the village, the gate closes behind him with a resonant thud. Ronan places a reassuring hand on Cody’s shoulder, a silent promise of protection and guidance in the years to come. Cody, now on the brink of receiving his gift and curse, stands poised between the joy of the moment and the somber reality of his future within Stonevale’s walls.

• Open Loop: What will happen to Cody now that he became what he didn’t really want to become?
• Empathy/Distress: Cody is now unable to leave the village.
• Payoff: We finally get to see the ceremony.
• Irony: The curse of the artisans is that the can’t leave the village.
• Setup: The artisans not able to leave the town will be a key element for future episodes.

16. INT. SORCERESS TOWER – NIGHT: SECRET

• Start: Mirelle embarks on a bold experiment.
• Challenging Situation: Using the oil to animate Cody’s toys.
• Conflict: Mirelle’s desire for a connection clashes with ethical dilemmas.
• Action: Toys stir to life, a testament to Mirelle’s powerful magic.
• Finish: The experiment suggests future moral quandaries and potential alliances, amid a blend of awe and somberness.

As night shrouds the sorceress tower, Mirelle delves into a daring venture. Her workshop, cluttered with ancient tomes and arcane artifacts, becomes the crucible for a groundbreaking experiment. At the heart of her endeavor lies a collection of Cody’s discarded toys and a vial of the mysterious, animate oil, their fates intertwined by her ambitious spellcraft.

With a steady hand and a whispered incantation, Mirelle drips the silver oil onto an inert toy. Moments pass, heavy with anticipation, before the magic takes hold. The toy begins to move, imbued with a semblance of life that is both miraculous and unsettling. Mirelle watches, a spark of joy at the sight of her ‘child’ moving, yet shadowed by the deeper, ethical implications of her actions.

• Open Loop: How will Mirelle hide the creature she created? What will be the villager’s reaction when they find out about her secret? Are the creatures born from the magical oil good or bad?
• Mystery:
• Empathy/Distress: Betrayal: Mirelle betrays Ronan by stealing his kid’s toys and bringing them to life. Hurt those they love: Mirelle desperately wants kids. She is willing to hurt Ronan’s feelings to make her dream come true. Exposed: What will Ronan do when he finds out Mirelle experimented with the oil behind his back?
• Payoff: The toys that were left outside earlier are now used in Mirelle’s experiments.
• Setup: Mirelle just put in motion the inciting incident for the whole first season to unfold.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Scene Requirements

What I learned doing this assignment is that it’s of utmost importance to make sure that every scene contains all the elements of challenging situation, conflict, action and a finish that is different than start.

Do PASS 1 and PASS 2 for each scene.

TEASER

EXT. FOREST TRAIL – NIGHT

PASS 1:

• Start: Jubilant return from mining.
• Challenging Situation: A fallen tree and an injured “girl” block their way.
• Conflict: Ambush by Grimlopes disguised as a ruse.
• Action: The warriors draw weapons, engaging in combat to protect their gold, as the Grimlopes reveal themselves and the fight ensues.
• Finish: Discovering Dusty and his wife are missing after the skirmish.

PASS 2:
The moon casts a soft glow over the forest trail as Urnek, Gunthor, Dusty, and his wife, their spirits buoyed by a successful mining expedition, jovially return home. Their laughter and the melodies of an Irish tune fill the night air until a seemingly insurmountable fallen tree obstructs their path. At the base of the tree, a Little Girl appears injured and helpless, drawing their immediate attention and concern.

As the group cautiously approaches, intent on offering aid, the air suddenly thickens with tension. The “injured” girl transforms into Mash, a mischievous and malevolent Grimlope, marking the beginning of a well-orchestrated ambush. From the shadows, more Grimlopes emerge, encircling the miners.

The peaceful night erupts into chaos. Urnek, Gunthor, and Dusty, realizing the gravity of their predicament, draw their weapons in defiance, ready to protect their hard-earned treasures. A fierce battle ensues, the clashing of swords and the shouts of men breaking the forest’s tranquility. Yet, in the heat of battle, a horrifying discovery is made: Dusty and his wife are nowhere to be found. A

ACT 1

INT. FORGE – DAY

PASS 1:

• Start: Ronan working in the forge.
• Challenging Situation: A scout reports a mysterious threat.
• Conflict: The village needs to be warned.
• Action: Ronan instructs the scout to ring the alarm, but the scene focuses on his work.
• Finish: Ronan prepares for battle, signaling a shift to defensive readiness.

PASS 2:

In the heart of the village, the forge’s fires burn brightly as Ronan, the master blacksmith, pounds at a piece of metal with determined strokes. Suddenly, the forge’s rhythmic sounds are interrupted by the hurried entrance of a scout, breathless and wide-eyed with urgency. “He’s coming down the mountain,” the scout reports.

He instructs the scout to alert the village, then abandons his work, shifting from creation to preparation for combat, signaling a community on the brink of defense.

EXT. BRIDGE, ONE MILE OUTSIDE STONEVALE VILLAGE – MORNING

PASS 1:

• Start: Two fishermen fishing peacefully.
• Challenging Situation: Nayeli has to catch all those fish.
• Conflict: Nayeli’s archery prowess outmatches the fishermen’s traditional methods.
• Action: Nayeli impales multiple fish with arrows, contrasting with the fishermen’s slower pace.
• Finish: Nayeli demonstrates her superior skill, leaving the fishermen in awe as she proceeds to the market.

PASS 2:

The serene waters near Stonevale Village ripple gently as two fishermen cast their lines into the river, hoping for a bountiful catch. Their morning tranquility is soon overshadowed by the swift and silent approach of Nayeli. Without disturbing the fishermen’s quiet solitude, she draws her bow, eyes fixed on the water.

In one fluid motion, arrows fly from her bowstring, each finding its mark with precision as fish are plucked from the water and pinned to the riverbank. The fishermen, momentarily distracted by this unexpected display, watch in disbelief as Nayeli effortlessly outmatches their morning’s efforts in mere moments.

As she retrieves her catch, the contrast between her skill and their traditional methods is stark. The fishermen, now fully aware of Nayeli’s prowess, can only look on in silent admiration as she gathers her bounty and heads towards the market.

EXT. STONEVALE’S GATE – MORNING

PASS 1:

• Start: Nayeli approaches Stonevale’s gate.
• Challenging Situation: The alarm causes panic.
• Conflict: Nayeli, a stranger, is scrutinized and disarmed.
• Action: Guards confiscate her bow and arrows and allow her inside.
• Finish: Nayeli enters the village under a cloud of suspicion.

PASS 2:

Nayeli approaches the fortified gates of Stonevale, just as the alarm resounds, stirring panic. The fishermen scurry past her, easily admitted by the guards due to their familiar faces. Nayeli, marked as a stranger, is stopped; her bow and arrows are confiscated. With a heavy thud, the gates close behind her.

EXT. STONEVALE WALLS – MORNING

PASS 1:

• Start: A Golem attacks the village.
• Challenging Situation: The village’s defenses are tested.
• Conflict: Urnek plays hero against protocol.
• Action: Combat unfolds; Urnek charges ahead and is swatted down by the Golem.
• Finish: The immediate threat is repelled, but Urnek’s injury raises concerns about heroism and recklessness.

PASS 2:

As dawn breaks over Stonevale, a monstrous Golem, born from earth and dark magics, begins its relentless assault on the village walls. The villagers, roused from their homes, watch in horror as this behemoth of stone and malice advances. Among them, Ronan and Mirelle stand ready, an unlikely duo brought together by the dire circumstances.

Urnek, with a warrior’s heart and an impulsive spirit, sees this as his moment to shine. Ignoring the calls for caution, he rushes forward, a lone figure against a towering adversary. His bravery, though admirable, is quickly met with the Golem’s overpowering strength. A swift, powerful blow sends him crashing to the ground.

The battle rages on, but with Urnek’s fall, the village’s resolve hardens. Ronan and Mirelle, through a combination of craft and arcane prowess, manage to turn the tide, repelling the Golem’s attack.

ACT 2

EXT. PUBLIC MARKET – MORNING

PASS 1:

• Start: Nayeli sells fish in the market.
• Challenging Situation: Nayeli is underpaid due to the trader’s gift.
• Conflict: Nayeli manages to sell all but one fish, despite being underpaid.
• Action: Nayeli, undeterred, makes her sales, saving one last fish for Ben.
• Finish: Nayeli’s resilience and kindness are highlighted as she navigates the marketplace.

PASS 2:

Nayeli stands at the heart of Stonevale’s bustling morning market, her catch of fish attracting the attention of passersby and merchants alike. She engages with a sly trader, known for his crafty dealings, who praises her skills while simultaneously underpaying for her bountiful catch. Nayeli, aware yet unfazed by the unfair transaction, continues to sell her fish.

As the morning wears on, Nayeli finds herself with a single fish left. Spotting Ben, a young boy with wide, hopeful eyes, she hands him the last fish. The boy flees with his newfound treasure without saying thank you.

EXT. CANNON SITE – MORNING

PASS 1:

EXT. CANNON SITE – MORNING

• Start: Ronan works on an automatic cannon.
• Challenging Situation: A playful attack leads to chaos.
• Conflict: The discovery of a mysterious oil that animates metal.
• Action: Cannonballs become animated by the oil, creating havoc as Ronan attempts to contain it.
• Finish: The oil’s dangerous potential is unveiled, introducing new threats and possibilities.

PASS 2:

Ronan’s work on a massive cannon is disrupted by a playful skirmish with Urnek, leading to an accidental discovery of a mysterious oil that animates metal. This chaotic revelation opens the door to unforeseen dangers and the vast potential of their discovery.

ACT 3

EXT. ELEMENTARY SCHOOL – DAY

PASS 1:

• Start: Children pour out of the school on the last day before summer.
• Challenging Situation: Cody shares Urnek’s heroics.
• Conflict: Cody’s fascination with heroism contrasts Ronan’s practicality.
• Action: Cody enthusiastically recounts the tale, emphasizing Urnek’s bravery.
• Finish: Their walk past Mirelle’s tower underscores the magic-versus-tradition divide.

PASS 2:

The final bell rings, heralding the start of summer as children burst from the elementary school with unrestrained joy. Amidst this scene of youthful exuberance, Cody finds his father, Ronan, waiting. Together, they begin their walk home through the village’s lively streets. Cody bubbles with excitement, recounting Urnek’s valiant efforts against the Golem, his admiration for the warrior’s bravery palpable in his animated retelling.

Ronan listens, a smile playing on his lips, yet his eyes betray a hint of concern. The tale of heroism sparks a silent contemplation within him about the virtues of bravery versus the necessity of wisdom and caution. As they pass by Mirelle’s towering abode, a symbol of magic and mystery within the village, the unspoken divide between Ronan’s reliance on tradition and the untapped potential of magic that Cody finds so fascinating becomes all the more evident.

EXT. MIRELLE’S TOWER – DAY

PASS 1:

• Start: Mirelle receives a child’s drawing.
• Challenging Situation: The drawing depicts her negatively.
• Conflict: Mirelle’s isolation versus the village’s fear.
• Action: Mirelle’s facial expression shifts from anticipation to sadness upon seeing the drawing.
• Finish: Mirelle contemplates her place in a village that misunderstands her.

Mirelle is confronted with a drawing from a child that cruelly depicts her as a witch, highlighting her isolation and the village’s fear. This moment of personal hurt reflects the broader misunderstanding and prejudices she faces within Stonevale.

INT. RONAN’S FORGE – DAY

PASS 1:

• Start: Ronan and Cody discuss Cody’s future.
• Challenging Situation: Cody wants to give away his toys because he’s outgrown them.
• Conflict: Cody is not motivated to follow his father’s footsteps.
• Action: Cody sets aside a toy, indicating his decision to forge his own path.
• Finish: A rift between father and son emerges, highlighting a change in their relationship.

PASS 2:

Inside the forge, where the heat of the fire meets the cool resolve of the blacksmith, Ronan and Cody engage in a pivotal conversation about the future. Cody, standing amidst the remnants of his childhood, expresses a mature, thoughtful desire to give away his toys, symbolizing his readiness to leave childhood behind.

When mentioning the ceremony organized for Cody’s 12th birthday, the day he will officially become an artisan, his lack of motivation worries Ronan.

INT. RONAN’S FORGE – NIGHT

PASS 1:

• Start: Experiments with the animate oil.
• Challenging Situation: Creation of a living metal beetle.
• Conflict: Fear of the unknown against the allure of discovery.
• Action: The beetle comes to life and moves, causing Ronan to step back in alarm.
• Finish: Ronan destroys the beetle and forbids further experiments, marking a clear stance against the unknown.

PASS 2:

Ronan shows Mirelle the animate oil. Her experiment culminates in the animation of a metal beetle, a gift Ronan had give his late wife, a marvel of movement and life sparked from inanimate metal.

The beetle flies across the forge. Ronan, faced with the undeniable reality of their creation, makes a swift decision. With a decisive movement, he crushes the beetle, extinguishing the life they had just sparked. His proclamation against further experimentation echoes in the forge, a line drawn firmly in the sand.

ACT 4

INT. NAYELI’S TENT – EVENING

PASS 1:

• Start: Nayeli sets up her tent by herself.
• Challenging Situation: Sharing a meal and stories.
• Conflict: Nayeli’s growing connection to Stonevale’s struggles.
• Action: The fire casts shadows as Ben shares his story, Nayeli listens intently.
• Finish: Nayeli becomes more intertwined with the village’s destiny.

PASS 2:

Under the cloak of evening, Nayeli meticulously sets up her tent at the edge of Stonevale. The solitude of her task contrasts sharply with the camaraderie that soon unfolds as she and Ben, a boy with stories beyond his years, sit by a campfire that crackles with life and warmth.

As they share a simple meal, the ambient glow of the fire illuminates their faces, creating an intimate setting for storytelling. Ben, encouraged by Nayeli’s attentive silence, recounts the harrowing tale of his parents’ abduction by Grimlopes. Nayeli has so many questions for him about the secrets of the town.

INT. COUNCIL ROOM – EVENING

PASS 1:

• Start: The Ten Elders meet to discuss the village’s defense.
• Challenging Situation: A bat spies unnoticed.
• Conflict: Planning under the shadow of an unseen threat.
• Action: Elders discuss over maps, unaware of the bat above.
• Finish: The decision to strengthen security around the mineworkers is made, attempting to fortify against unseen dangers.

PASS 2:

In the solemn quietude of the council room, the ten elders of Stonevale gather around an ancient table littered with maps and scrolls. The gravity of their discussion, focused on fortifying the village against the looming threats, is palpable in the air, thick with the responsibility they bear.

The elders, deep in debate, resolve to bolster the defenses around the mineworkers, a critical juncture in their efforts to protect Stonevale. Yet, their unawareness of the bat’s silent vigil speaks to the vulnerability that shadows their best-laid plans.

INT. DRUID’S CHAMBER – EVENING

PASS 1:

• Start: Sylvanor plots with his Grimlopes.
• Challenging Situation: Planning a massive attack.
• Conflict: Sylvanor’s ambition versus the village’s defense.
• Action: Sylvanor gestures over a map, his grim intentions clear.
• Finish: Sylvanor sets his plan to attack Stonevale in 7 days, escalating the narrative tension.

PASS 2:

In the dimly lit confines of the druid’s chamber, Sylvanor, with a countenance carved from malice and ambition, convenes with his loyal Grimlopes, Torgan and Mash. The chamber, a sanctum of dark plans and darker magics, echoes with their conspiratorial tones. Sylvanor unfurls a detailed map of Stonevale, his finger tracing the paths of invasion, his eyes alight with the fire of impending conquest. In seven days, he vows, Stonevale will come under the shadow of his might.

ACT 5

EXT. GATE – NIGHT

PASS 1:

• Start: Ronan, Cody, and the artisans hold a pre-ceremony.
• Challenging Situation: Cody faces receiving his gift and curse at 12.
• Conflict: The imminent restriction on Cody’s freedom.
• Action: Ronan offers reassurance and support to Cody amidst the ceremonial preparations.
• Finish: Cody faces a future confined to the village, underlining the gravity of their traditions and the personal impact on Cody’s life.

PASS 2:

The night of Cody’s twelfth birthday brings a solemn and age-old tradition to life in the shadow of Stonevale’s imposing gate. The village gathers in a semi-circle, a collective breath held in anticipation, as Ronan, Cody, and the esteemed artisans stand at the forefront of this ancestral ceremony. The gate, usually a symbol of protection and boundary, tonight marks the threshold of Cody’s transition from childhood to the responsibilities waiting on the cusp of his twelfth year.

With the first stars of the evening as their witness, Cody is given the honor to step outside the village gate one final time as a child.

As Cody returns, crossing back into the village, the gate closes behind him with a resonant thud. Ronan places a reassuring hand on Cody’s shoulder, a silent promise of protection and guidance in the years to come. Cody, now on the brink of receiving his gift and curse, stands poised between the joy of the moment and the somber reality of his future within Stonevale’s walls.

INT. SORCERESS TOWER – NIGHT

PASS 1:

• Start: Mirelle embarks on a bold experiment.
• Challenging Situation: Using the oil to animate Cody’s toys.
• Conflict: Mirelle’s desire for a connection clashes with ethical dilemmas.
• Action: Toys stir to life, a testament to Mirelle’s powerful magic.
• Finish: The experiment suggests future moral quandaries and potential alliances, amid a blend of awe and somberness.

PASS 2:

As night shrouds the sorceress tower, Mirelle delves into a daring venture. Her workshop, cluttered with ancient tomes and arcane artifacts, becomes the crucible for a groundbreaking experiment. At the heart of her endeavor lies a collection of Cody’s discarded toys and a vial of the mysterious, animate oil, their fates intertwined by her ambitious spellcraft.

With a steady hand and a whispered incantation, Mirelle drips the silver oil onto an inert toy. Moments pass, heavy with anticipation, before the magic takes hold. The toy begins to move, imbued with a semblance of life that is both miraculous and unsettling. Mirelle watches, a spark of joy at the sight of her ‘child’ moving, yet shadowed by the deeper, ethical implications of her actions.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Beat Sheet

What I learned doing this assignment is that that my structure was not as strong as I thought. My two first turning points were weak.

1. Tell us your Show Concept and Inciting Incident.

Concept: What if an enchanted town, where classes of villagers possess unique gifts and curses given by their birth-gemstones, was thrown into chaos by a mystical liquid that breathes life into toy knights?

Inciting Incident: A sorceress creates a living metal knight using a mysterious magical oil.

2. List your A, B, and C Stories.

A story: A mysterious magical oil seeps up the ground. The sorceress uses it to bring a metal creatures to life, completely oblivious to the fact that it might not be safe.

B story: Nayeli’s quest brought her to Stonevale. Mineworker’s abduction. Sylvanor and his army prepare a siege against Stonevale.

C story: Ronan’s family and town’s politics with the council.

3. Present your current Beat Sheet with no dialogue.

TEASER

EXT. FOREST TRAIL – NIGHT
URNEK, GUNTHOR, DUSTY, and his wife jubilantly traverse a forest trail, their spirits high from a successful mining expedition, their voices carrying an Irish tune through the night. Their celebration is abruptly halted by a fallen tree, behind which appears to be an injured LITTLE GIRL. As the woodsmen warriors investigate, the child reveals herself as MASH, a mischievous Grimlope, marking the start of an ambush. Surrounded by grimlopes, the woodsmen are plunged into a confrontation, battling to protect their gold-laden cart. Amidst the chaos, Dusty and his wife vanish, leaving Urnek and Gunthor to face the grim reality of their predicament.

ACT 1

INT. FORGE – DAY
Three months have elapsed. In the bustling forge, RONAN, the village blacksmith, is engrossed in his craft when a breathless SCOUT bursts in. The scout urgently reports, “He’s coming down the mountain,” hinting at a mysterious, ominous presence. Ronan, understanding the gravity, orders the scout to sound the alarm, signaling danger to the village.

EXT. BRIDGE, ONE MILE OUTSIDE STONEVALE VILLAGE – MORNING
On a serene morning, two FISHERMEN, engrossed in their usual banter, witness NAYELI’s remarkable archery, as she skillfully impales multiple fish in a single, fluid motion. Awed by her prowess, they look on as Nayeli continues toward the market, leaving a lasting impression.

EXT. STONEVALE’S GATE – MORNING
Nayeli approaches the fortified gates of Stonevale, just as the alarm resounds, stirring panic. The fishermen scurry past her, easily admitted by the guards due to their familiar faces. Nayeli, marked as a stranger, is stopped; her bow and arrows are confiscated. With a heavy thud, the gates close behind her, underlining the town’s palpable tension.

EXT. STONEVALE WALLS – MORNING
Chaos unfolds as a GOLEM launches an assault on the town’s defenses. Ronan and MIRELLE unite in a desperate counterattack, showcasing a blend of brute force and arcane prowess. The WOODSMEN WARRIORS, ready for battle, find themselves sidelined as URNEK rushes in, attempting heroism but instead finds injury, adding to the day’s unpredictability.

ACT 2

EXT. PUBLIC MARKET – MORNING
In the bustling marketplace, Nayeli sells her uniquely impaled fish to a FISHMONGER, who’s intrigued by their unusual condition. Nayeli falls victim to the merchant’s spell and accepts a price much lower than what she usually sells her fish for. Spotting BEN, a scruffy young boy, Nayeli offers him a fish, advising stealth. Ben, grateful for the gesture, disappears into the crowd with his prize.

EXT. CANNON SITE – MORNING
Ronan is engrossed in constructing a formidable automatic cannon when an injured Urnek, from his hospital bed, initiates a playful barrage of pillow attacks. A misfired return volley causes havoc, inadvertently unleashing a storm of cannonballs that awaken upon contact with a mysterious silver oil, resulting in unforeseen destruction. Ronan hastily covers the source of the chaos.

ACT 3

EXT. ELEMENTARY SCHOOL – DAY
Post-graduation, CODY bubbles with excitement, sharing tales of Urnek’s bravery with Ronan. Their light-hearted exchange continues through Stonevale’s vibrant streets, bypassing Mirelle’s tower—a silent testament to Ronan’s disregard for magic.

EXT. MIRELLE’S TOWER – DAY
A child approaches Mirelle with a drawing that cruelly caricatures her as a fearsome witch. The depiction wounds her, reflecting the village’s skewed perception and her isolation.

INT. RONAN’S FORGE – DAY
Ronan and Cody come back home. They mention that he will turn 12 soon. They have an argument about Cody not wanting to become a blacksmith. Cody mentions to Ronan he wants to give away his toys.

INT. RONAN’S FORGE – NIGHT
Intrigued, Mirelle and Ronan delve into experiments with the dark elixir, inadvertently creating a living metal beetle. While Ronan reacts with panic, Mirelle sees untapped potential in this new discovery.

ACT 4

INT. NAYELI’S TENT – EVENING
As the night deepens, Nayeli and Ben, now allies, share a meal by the fire. Ben’s story of his parents’ grim fate at the hands of Grimlopes offers Nayeli a glimpse into the complexities of Stonevale society.

INT. COUNCIL ROOM – EVENING
The TEN ELDERS deliberate on strategies to fortify the village against escalating threats. Unbeknownst to them, a BAT spies from above, a silent witness to their plans.

INT. DRUID’S CHAMBER – EVENING
SYLVANOR, observing through his spy bat, plots with his GRIMLOPES, TORGAN and MASH. He outlines a ruthless strategy for a massive onslaught aimed at capturing the mineworkers, setting the stage for an impending siege.

ACT 5

INT. CODY’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
In a tender moment, Ronan opens up to Cody about Amber, Cody’s mother, whose life was claimed by magic. He offers reassurance against the backdrop of an uncertain future, pledging to keep the dangers at bay.

INT. SORCERESS TOWER – NIGHT

Mirelle, in a bold and secretive endeavor, gathers Cody’s abandoned toys. With the magical oil, she breathes life into them, whispering, “My child,” hinting at her deep-seated longing for connection and legacy.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra Setting Up The Future

What I learned doing this assignment is that AI gave me the idea that the magical silver oil could be made from Sylvanor’s broken stone fragment. This is a real breakthrough actually!

—

Make a list of events/character reveals/under-the-surface info that COULD be set up in the pilot.

– Ben reveals the power and curse of his stone. This raises the question, what are the powers and the curses of the other stones?

– Sylvanor prepares his army for an eventual attack.

– Mirelle brings one of Cody’s toy to life but there are many toys. Will she bring the other ones to life as well?

– Nayeli sees something lurking in the shadows and hears a kid laughing? What is it?

– Nayeli travels alone? What is she looking for?

– Who destroyed Cody’s project?

– Where does the magical oil come from?

– What happened to the mineworkers? Where were they taken?

– Why can’t Mirelle have any children?

– Why does Sylvanor need all of the Stonevale’s mineworkers?

– Why doesn’t Cody want to follow his parents’ footsteps?

– How will Mirelle hide the creature she created?

– What will be the villager’s reaction when they find out about her secret?

– Are the creatures born from the magical oil good or bad?

– Rivalry between Lambert and Urnek. How will this end?

– How will Lambert’s weapons defend when they will be attacked?

—

Fill those into the Outline and tell us which ones you are going to use.

Teaser:

• While escorting a mineworker couple through the forest, Urnek and his comrade are ambushed by a horde of grimlopes, shadowy creatures known for their greed.
• Turning Point: Breaking from their usual motive of stealing gold, the grimlopes unexpectedly kidnap the mineworker couple, signaling a sinister shift in their behavior.
• Setup – What happened to the mineworkers? Where were they taken?

Act 1:

• Three months after the mineworker’s abductions. Lambert, the town’s blacksmith, finds himself in a heated argument with Urnek regarding the town’s safety measures.
• Setup – Rivalry between Lambert and Urnek. How will this end?
• Setup – How will Lambert’s weapons defend when they will be attacked?
• Turning Point: Amidst their dispute, the automatic cannon Lambert is repairing misfires, striking the earth and uncovering a mysterious oil that seeps out from the ground.
• Setup – Where does the magical oil come from?

Act 2:

• Lambert picks up his son Cody from school. It’s the last day before summer. They walk through the town and pass everyone.
• A kid brings a drawing to Mirelle. She opens it and sees that it depicts her as a gruesome witch who scares kids away. It saddens her to see that she is portrayed that way.
• Nayeli arrives in Stonevale for the first time. She is surprised at how heavily guarded the town is. She leaves her bow and arrow at the gate.
• Setup – Nayeli travels alone? What is she looking for?
• Lambert surprises his son, Cody, by completing Cody’s automatic cannon project. However, they discover the project in ruins.
• Setup – Who destroyed Cody’s project?
• Turning Point/Midpoint: Heartbroken, Cody flees and accidentally falls into the mysterious oil, causing some drops to fall on the shattered metal pieces. The pieces take a life of their own, revealing the oil’s magical properties.

Act 3:

• Seeking understanding, Lambert invites Mirelle, known for her knowledge of magic, hoping she can shed light on the oil’s power.
• Nayeli sets up her tent in the town. She meets Ben, a 10-year-old boy who says he’s been an orphan since his parents were abducted three months ago. We understand he is talking about the mineworker couple.
• Setup – Nayeli sees something lurking in the shadows and hears a kid laughing? What is it?
• Setup – Ben reveals the power and curse of his stone. This raises the question, what are the powers and the curses of the other stones?
• Turning Point: Driven by curiosity rather than caution, Mirelle animates a metal butterfly with the oil. Lambert, fearing the unknown implications, destroys the creation and bans further experimentation.

Act 4:

• To bolster the town’s security, King Marcus decides to significantly increase the guard for the mineworkers, hoping to deter further attacks.
• Turning Point: Sylvanor, the vengeful druid, observes the town’s movements through his spy bat. Seeing an opportunity, he orders his entire army to launch a surprise attack on the town, aiming to capture the mineworkers all at once.
• Setup – Sylvanor prepares his army for an eventual attack.
• Setup – Why does Sylvanor need all of the Stonevale’s mineworkers?

Act 5:

• Lambert tucks Cody into bed, reassuring him about the town’s defenses and their capability to ward off any outside threats.
• Setup – Why doesn’t Cody want to follow his parents’ footsteps?
• Lock In: In a bold move, Mirelle stealthily collects all of Cody’s discarded toys. Using the magical oil, she breathes life into one, hinting at her plan to harness the oil’s power for purposes unknown.
• Setup – Mirelle brings one of Cody’s toy to life but there are many toys. Will she bring the other ones to life as well?
• Setup – How will Mirelle hide the creature she created?
• Setup – What will be the villager’s reaction when they find out about her secret?
• Setup – Are the creatures born from the magical oil good or bad?

—

Run it through AI:
1. The Mysterious Silver Oil

• A. Possible reveal in future episode: The oil is a remnant of a powerful, ancient magic that once thrived in the area, connected to the birthstones’ powers.
• B. Setup: Discovery of the silver oil seeping from the ground.
• C. How it could be set up in the pilot: Lambert and Cody accidentally uncovering the oil while repairing the cannon, setting the stage for its magical properties to be explored and its origins revealed.

2. The Transformation of the Mineworkers

• A. Possible reveal in future episode: The mineworkers have been transformed into creatures or possess new magical abilities due to their abduction by the grimlopes.
• B. Setup: Grimlopes kidnapping the mineworker couple for reasons beyond stealing gold.
• C. How it could be set up in the pilot: Show a brief glimpse of the kidnapped mineworkers undergoing a mysterious ritual or transformation in the grimlopes’ lair.

3. Nayeli’s Quest for Her Tribe’s Bow

• A. Possible reveal in future episode: The bow’s location is hidden somewhere within or near Stonevale, protected by ancient magic or guardians.
• B. Setup: Nayeli’s arrival in Stonevale on a personal quest, hinting at her search for the legendary bow.
• C. How it could be set up in the pilot: Nayeli sharing a cryptic dream or vision about her tribe’s bow being close by, igniting her determination to find it.

4. Sylvanor’s Connection to the Silver Oil

• A. Possible reveal in future episode: Sylvanor is the original creator of the silver oil, aiming to use it for a grand scheme.
• B. Setup: The appearance of the silver oil in the village and the shadowy figure of Sylvanor observing the village.
• C. How it could be set up in the pilot: Sylvanor watching the events unfold in Stonevale from afar, muttering about the oil’s importance to his plans.

5. Mirelle’s Secret Heritage

• A. Possible reveal in future episode: Mirelle and Sylvanor are siblings, and their magical prowess stems from a shared, powerful lineage.
• B. Setup: Mirelle’s unique magical abilities and her secretive experiments with the silver oil.
• C. How it could be set up in the pilot: Drop hints of Mirelle’s past that suggest a connection to Sylvanor, perhaps through a unique magical artifact or shared magical phrase unknown to others.

6. Lambert’s Struggle with Magic

• A. Possible reveal in future episode: Lambert’s eventual embrace of magic, merging it with his craftsmanship to create unparalleled defenses for Stonevale.
• B. Setup: Lambert’s skepticism towards magic and his reliance on technology.
• C. How it could be set up in the pilot: Lambert arguing with Mirelle about the dangers of magic, while also showing a hidden fascination or unintended use of the silver oil.

7. Urnek’s Ambition and Loyalty

• A. Possible reveal in future episode: Urnek’s potential rise as a wise leader who finds a balance between strength and intelligence.
• B. Setup: Urnek’s internal conflict over his role in the village and his hidden wish for Lambert’s mechanical defenses to fail.
• C. How it could be set up in the pilot: Show Urnek taking a strategic decision in the battle or giving a piece of surprisingly insightful advice, hinting at his potential for growth beyond brute strength.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra Adding Empathy/Distress!

What I learned doing this assignment is that I have done a good job at putting enough empathy and distress in my pilot. I’ve also learned that once we have an idea, we can brainstorm other ideas to raise the stakes and make it more painful.

1. Look through your outline and see if any of these as a bigger frame for your story, or if you already have it in the story, can you emphasize or expand it:

• A. Crucible: None that fit in my pilot
• B. Betrayal: Mash disguises himself as a helpless little girl to ambush Urnek, Gunthor and the mineworkers. Mirelle betrays Lambert by stealing his kid’s toys and bringing them to life.
• C. Forced Decision: When Lambert finds the magical oil, he feels he doesn’t have a choice to report it to Mirelle, even though it’s the last thing he wants to do.
• D. Hurt those they love: Mirelle desperately wants kids. She is willing to hurt Lambert’s feelings to make her dream come true.
• E. Emotional Dilemma: The mineworker who asks protection to the king must accept to pay the king what he wants.
• F. Exposed: What will Lambert do when he finds out Mirelle experimented with the oil behind his back?
• G. Must Make Decision with Future Consequences: Lambert finished his son’s project but the cannon destroyed part of a building and almost killed some people. Now, out of revenge, someone has destroyed the weapon.

2. Looking at your scenes, are there places you can create situations to cause more Empathy/Distress?

Step 1: Check each scene to see if you can build any of these forms of Empathy/Distress into them.

• Undeserved misfortune: Lambert’s peaceful life as a blacksmith is upended by the discovery of the magical oil.
• External character conflicts: Lambert must deal with the villagers’ skepticism and the sorcereress deceptions.
• Plot intruding on life: His expertise leads him to uncovering a plot that thrusts him into unwanted danger.
• Plans that failed: Urnek and Gunthor successfully protected the gold but failed to protect the mineworkers who were abducted.
• Witnessing the pain of others
• Extreme consequences: After Cody’s weapon misfired, someone tore it to pieces.
• Major loss: The first two mineworkers are abducted at the beginning of the pilot. Now, 3 months later, it’s a dozen of mineworkers that are missing.
• Brings their wound present: When the school kid shows Mirelle the drawing of kids being afraid of her, it opens her wound that she cannot have children of her own. When Urnek argues with Lambert, the blacksmith reminds Urnek that he might be too dumb to understand the concept of strategic defenses. When Lambert’s son doesn’t show excitement to turn 12 and start his apprenticeship as an artisan, it saddens Lambert.

Run it through AI:
Undeserved Misfortune

• Lambert and Cody: The destruction of Cody’s automatic cannon project, something he dearly looked forward to, serves as a poignant example. This not only highlights the unpredictability of their world but also Lambert’s struggle to protect his son from disappointment, underscoring the fragility of their peace and safety.

External Character Conflicts

• Urnek’s Rivalry: Urnek secretly wishing for Lambert’s mechanical defenses to fail introduces external conflict rooted in their different approaches to protecting the town. This rivalry can be expanded to involve confrontations that challenge their principles and loyalty to the village.

Plot Intruding on Life

• Nayeli’s Arrival: Her adaptation to the heavily guarded and suspicious nature of Stonevale, coupled with her quest, can lead to personal dilemmas as she gets entangled with the town’s fate against her initial will.

Plans That Failed

• The Mineworker Ambush: The teaser’s grimlope attack demonstrates the village’s vulnerability and the failure of its existing protections, setting the stage for escalating threats.

Witnessing the Pain of Others

• Ben’s Orphanhood: Ben sharing his story with Nayeli provides a powerful moment for Nayeli (and the audience) to witness the direct consequences of the village’s dangers on its most innocent inhabitants.

Extreme Consequences

• Mirelle’s Experimentation: Her animation of a metal butterfly, despite Lambert’s prohibition, showcases the extreme consequences of curiosity unchecked by wisdom, potentially endangering the whole village.

Major Loss

• The Kidnapping: The abduction of the mineworker couple signifies a major loss for the community and particularly for Ben, emphasizing the personal stakes involved in the village’s security.

Brings Their Wound Present

• Lambert’s Internal Conflict: Cody’s rejection of the blacksmithing legacy and Lambert’s discovery of the animate oil magnify his internal conflict between preserving tradition and embracing new, uncertain powers.

Crucible

• Sylvanor’s Attack: The planned surprise attack by Sylvanor puts the entire village, especially its leadership and defenses, under a crucible, testing their resilience, unity, and strategies for survival.

Betrayal

• Mirelle’s Secret Origin: Revealing Mirelle as the progenitor of the village’s populace, especially if discovered by the villagers, could feel like a betrayal, unraveling trust and unity.

Forced Decision

• Lambert and Mirelle: Lambert destroying Mirelle’s animated butterfly and banning further experimentation forces them both into a corner, with Lambert choosing the town’s safety over scientific curiosity and Mirelle having to choose between her passion for magic and compliance with Lambert’s decree.

Hurt Those They Love

• Cody’s Adventure: Cody’s innocent adventure that leads to the animation of the metal fragments puts him in danger, causing Lambert distress and forcing him to confront his own creations.

Emotional Dilemma

• Nayeli’s Quest vs. New Bonds: Nayeli’s internal struggle between continuing her solitary quest for her tribe’s bow or forming new bonds in Stonevale, especially as she becomes involved in defending the town, creates a deep emotional dilemma.

Exposed

• Urnek’s Weakness: A situation where Urnek’s lack of cunning is exposed in a critical moment, perhaps during Sylvanor’s attack, could serve to humble him and force growth in unexpected ways.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Open Loops and Mysteries

What I learned doing this assignment I should spend more time talking about my main mystery in my pilot.

Look through your current outline and find opportunities for at least 5 Open Loops and 5 Mysteries either in the plot or about the characters.

• Main Mystery: Why did the grimlopes abduct the mineworkers?
• Sub-Mysteries:
• (M) Why is Lambert building a cannon? What do they need protection from?
• (M) What are the origins of this oil?
• (M) Who destroyed Cody’s project?
• (M) Why can’t Mirelle have any children?
• (M) Where does Nayeli come from?
• (M) Why does Sylvanor need all of the Gemvale’s mineworkers?
• (M) Why doesn’t Cody want to follow his parents footsteps?

• Main Open Loop: Are the creatures born from the magical oil good or bad?
• Sub-Open Loops:
• (OL) Will Urnek and his comrade fight off the grimlopes so that they don’t steal the gold?
• (OL) What happened to the mineworkers? Where were they taken?
• (OL) What unique properties does this mysterious oil has?
• (OL) What is Nayeli looking for going from town to town?
• (OL) What are the implications of having a magical oil that can animate metal?
• (OL) How will Lambert contain this secret?
• (OL) Will Mirelle listen to Lambert and stop all experimentations on the oil?
• (OL) What are the powers and curses of each stone?
• (OL) Will Sylvanor’s forces overcome Gemvale’s defenses?
• (OL) How will Mirelle hide the creature she created?
• (OL) What will be the villager’s reaction when they find out about her secret?

—

Add those to your outline:

Teaser:

• Essence: While escorting a mineworker through the forest, Urnek and his comrade are ambushed by a horde of grimlopes, shadowy creatures known for their greed.
• (OL) Will Urnek and his comrade fight off the grimlopes so that they don’t steal the gold?
• Turning Point: Breaking from their usual motive of stealing gold, the grimlopes unexpectedly kidnap the mineworker, signaling a sinister shift in their behavior.
• Main Mystery: Why did the grimlopes abduct the mineworkers?
• (OL) What happened to the mineworkers? Where were they taken?

Act 1:

• Essence: Lambert, the town’s blacksmith, finds himself in a heated argument with Urnek regarding the town’s safety measures.
• (M) Why is Lambert building a cannon? What do they need protection from?
• Turning Point: Amidst their dispute, the automatic cannon Lambert is repairing misfires, striking the earth and uncovering a mysterious oil that seeps out from the ground.
• (OL) What unique properties does this mysterious oil has?
• (M) What are the origins of this oil?

Act 2:

• Essence: Lambert surprises his son, Cody, by completing Cody’s automatic cannon project. However, they discover the project in ruins.
• (M) Who destroyed Cody’s project?
• (M) Where does Nayeli come from?
• (OL) What is Nayeli looking for going from town to town?
• Turning Point/Midpoint: Heartbroken, Cody flees and accidentally falls into the mysterious oil, causing some drops to fall on the shattered metal pieces. The pieces take a life of their own, revealing the oil’s magical properties.
• (OL) What are the implications of having a magical oil that can animate metal?

Act 3:

• Essence: Seeking understanding, Lambert invites Mirelle, known for her knowledge of magic, hoping she can shed light on the oil’s power.
• Turning Point: Driven by curiosity rather than caution, Mirelle animates a metal butterfly with the oil. Lambert, fearing the unknown implications, destroys the creation and bans further experimentation.
• (OL) How will Lambert contain this secret?
• (OL) Will Mirelle listen to Lambert and stop all experimentations on the oil?
• (M) Why can’t Mirelle have any children?

Act 4:

• Essence: To bolster the town’s security, King Marcus decides to significantly increase the guard for the mineworkers, hoping to deter further attacks.
• (OL) What are the powers and curses of each stone?
• Turning Point: Sylvanor, the vengeful druid, observes the town’s movements through his spy bat. Seeing an opportunity, he orders his entire army to launch a surprise attack on the town, aiming to capture the mineworkers all at once.
• (M) Why does Sylvanor need all of the Gemvale’s mineworkers?
• (OL) Will Sylvanor’s forces overcome Gemvale’s defenses?

Act 5:

• Essence: Lambert tucks Cody into bed, reassuring him about the town’s defenses and their capability to ward off any outside threats.
• (M) Why doesn’t Cody want to follow his parents footsteps?
• Lock In: In a bold move, Mirelle stealthily collects all of Cody’s discarded toys. Using the magical oil, she breathes life into one, hinting at her plan to harness the oil’s power for purposes unknown.
• (OL) How will Mirelle hide the creature she created?
• (OL) What will be the villager’s reaction when they find out about her secret?
• Main Open Loop: Are the creatures born from the magical oil good or bad?

—

Run it through AI to find improvements:

Mystery 1: Why did the grimlopes kidnap the mineworkers?

• A. Shocking Event: The grimlopes, typically greedy creatures, unexpectedly shift their behavior from stealing gold to kidnapping mineworkers.
• B. Secret: It remains unclear what the grimlopes intend with the mineworkers, hinting at a larger, undisclosed motive or plan.
• C. Investigation: Lambert and others might seek to uncover the reason behind the grimlopes’ actions, though the 5 Act Structure does not explicitly detail this investigation.

Improve:

• Bold A: To enhance the shocking event, consider introducing a personal stake for a main character, such as a mineworker being a relative or close friend of a key character.
• Bold B: Integrate hints or clues about the grimlopes’ motive early on, perhaps through legends or rumors, to deepen the mystery.
• Bold C: Explicitly include scenes of Lambert or others actively seeking answers about the grimlopes, perhaps by consulting ancient texts, tracking them, or seeking wisdom from the village sorceress.

Mystery 2: Are the magical oil creatures good or bad?

• A. Cover up: The town, especially figures like Lambert, might initially seek to hide the existence of the magical oil creatures from the wider community due to fear of the unknown.
• B. Secret: The true nature and potential of the magical oil creatures remain secret, surrounded by uncertainty and speculation.
• C. Reveals: The gradual discovery of the magical oil’s properties and the creatures it animates, as seen through acts 2 and 3, peels back layers of the mystery.

Improve:

• Bold A: To improve the cover-up aspect, introduce conflict or tension between characters who wish to explore the oil’s potential and those who fear its dangers, highlighting the town’s divide.
• Bold B: Offer more nuanced insights into the magical oil’s origins or effects, perhaps through Mirelle’s experiments or ancient lore, to enrich the secret surrounding it.
• Bold C: Ensure that each reveal builds logically on the last, leading to a climax that challenges the characters’ initial beliefs about the oil creatures.

Additional Notes:

• Intriguing World: The enchanted town of Stonevale, born from magical gemstones, is a compelling setting that could further intertwine with the mysteries. For instance, the town’s origins might be linked to the grimlopes’ motives or the magical oil.
• Impossible Goal: Lambert’s goal to protect the town introduces a broader conflict, especially with Mirelle’s actions. Highlighting the challenges Lambert faces, not only from external threats but also from within, could add depth to the narrative.
• Major Conflict: Mirelle’s curiosity-driven actions versus Lambert’s caution presents a fundamental clash of ideals. This conflict could be leveraged to drive both the plot and character development, emphasizing the themes of curiosity, control, and the fear of the unknown.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra Stacks Intrigue

What I learned doing this assignment is that a turning point is much more satisfying for the viewer if we set it up with intrigues first.

—

Select the intrigue ideas you like and add them to your growing outline:

Act 1:

– Strange Behavior: The ground where the cannon hits reacts unnaturally, pulsating slightly as if alive before releasing the oil.

• Turning Point: Amidst their dispute, the automatic cannon Lambert is repairing misfires, striking the earth and uncovering a mysterious oil that seeps out from the ground.

Act 2:

– Intrigue: The mysterious oil seeps from the ground when the canon breaks the earth.

– Wound: Lambert fears magic.

• Turning Point/Midpoint: Heartbroken, Cody flees and accidentally falls into the mysterious oil, causing some drops to fall on the shattered metal pieces. The pieces take a life of their own, revealing the oil’s magical properties.

Act 3:

– Intriguing world: Mirelle is a sorceress who masters magic.

– Hidden Agenda: Mirelle shows an unusual interest in the oil, hinting at her own secretive experiments with similar substances.

– Wound: Lambert fears magic.

– Mystery: The metal butterfly exhibits behaviors indicating it possesses consciousness, not just animation.

• Turning Point: Driven by curiosity rather than caution, Mirelle animates a metal butterfly with the oil. Lambert, fearing the unknown implications, destroys the creation and bans further experimentation.

Act 4:

– Conspiracy: The mineworkers have been disappearing for the past 2 months.

– Secret identity: The bat appears at a couple of moments in the sky.

– Intriguing world: Ben mentions the druid to Nayeli

– Hidden Agenda: Hint that Sylvanor’s motives are more complex.

• Turning Point: Sylvanor, the vengeful druid, observes the town’s movements through his spy bat. Seeing an opportunity, he orders his entire army to launch a surprise attack on the town, aiming to capture the mineworkers all at once.

Act 5:

– Wound: Mirelle can’t have children

– Hidden agenda: Mirelle steals Cody’s toys and visits the site where Lambert found the oil

– Deception: Lambert believes Mirelle has ceased her experiments, unaware of her nocturnal activities, adding a layer of secrecy and rebellion to her character.

• Lock In: In a bold move, Mirelle stealthily collects all of Cody’s discarded toys. Using the magical oil, she breathes life into one, hinting at her plan to harness the oil’s power for purposes unknown.

Run it through AI:

Teaser:

• Intrigue 1: (Intriguing World) The forest’s eerie silence is broken by distant, haunting howls, hinting at the grimlopes’ presence even before they appear.
• Intrigue 2: (Secret Identity) Urnek notices peculiar markings on a tree, suggesting someone or something is tracking the grimlopes’ movements.
• Intrigue 3: (Mystery) The mineworker whispers of an ancient legend tied to the forest, implying a deeper significance to their journey.
• Turning Point: Breaking from their usual motive of stealing gold, the grimlopes unexpectedly kidnap the mineworker, signaling a sinister shift in their behavior.
• Improve: To heighten intrigue, hint at a personal connection between the mineworker and the forest’s legends, suggesting his kidnapping was not random but predestined.

—

Act 1:

• Intrigue 1: (Hidden Layer) The argument between Lambert and Urnek is observed by a mysterious figure shrouded in a cloak, hinting at espionage.
• Intrigue 2: (Conspiracy) Lambert’s recent creation of advanced weaponry has sparked whispers among the townsfolk, fearing it attracts unwanted attention.
• Intrigue 3: (Strange Behavior) The ground where the cannon hits reacts unnaturally, pulsating slightly as if alive before releasing the oil.
• Turning Point: Amidst their dispute, the automatic cannon Lambert is repairing misfires, striking the earth and uncovering a mysterious oil that seeps out from the ground.
• Improve: Add a layer of intrigue by showing fleeting visions of the oil’s past uses and its significance, enticing viewers with its mysterious origins and potential.

—

Act 2:

• Intrigue 1: (Deception) Cody’s project is sabotaged, not just ruined by accident, pointing to internal village conflicts.
• Intrigue 2: (Hidden Agenda) Mirelle shows an unusual interest in the oil, hinting at her own secretive experiments with similar substances.
• Intrigue 3: (Wound) Flashbacks reveal Cody’s deep connection to the project, tied to memories of his mother, increasing the emotional stakes.
• Turning Point/Midpoint: Heartbroken, Cody flees and accidentally falls into the mysterious oil, causing some drops to fall on the shattered metal pieces. The pieces take a life of their own, revealing the oil’s magical properties.
• Improve: Intensify the emotional and mysterious ambiance by having Cody’s fall into the oil seem fated, with ethereal voices guiding him to the spot, suggesting a destined interaction with the magical oil.

—

Act 3:

• Intrigue 1: (Secret) Lambert discovers old texts in Mirelle’s possession, revealing her knowledge of the oil’s history.
• Intrigue 2: (Mystery) The metal butterfly exhibits behaviors indicating it possesses consciousness, not just animation.
• Intrigue 3: (Accusation) A council member accuses Lambert of dabbling in forbidden magics, heightening tensions.
• Turning Point: Driven by curiosity rather than caution, Mirelle animates a metal butterfly with the oil. Lambert, fearing the unknown implications, destroys the creation and bans further experimentation.
• Improve: To add depth, introduce a moral dilemma for Lambert, showing his internal conflict over using the oil’s power to protect the town despite his fears, thus enriching his character development.

—

Act 4:

• Intrigue 1: (Conspiracy) Sylvanor communicates with a traitor within the town’s walls, revealing a planned inside attack.
• Intrigue 2: (Secret Identity) Sylvanor uses enchanted artifacts to spy, hinting at his vast magical resources and intelligence network.
• Intrigue 3: (Hidden Agenda) Sylvanor’s motives are revealed to be more complex than mere vengeance, tied to a prophecy involving the silver oil.
• Turning Point: Sylvanor, the vengeful druid, observes the town’s movements through his spy bat. Seeing an opportunity, he orders his entire army to launch a surprise attack on the town, aiming to capture the mineworkers all at once.
• Improve: Weave a subplot showing Sylvanor’s personal connection to the prophecy, making his actions more relatable and adding layers to his antagonistic role.

—

Act 5:

• Intrigue 1: (Mystery) Mirelle’s collection of Cody’s toys is intercut with flashbacks to her own childless past, suggesting a poignant motive behind her actions.
• Intrigue 2: (Hidden Layer) As Mirelle works, symbols in the workshop glow subtly, hinting at a deeper magical network or power source she’s tapping into.
• Intrigue 3: (Deception) The town believes Mirelle has ceased her experiments, unaware of her nocturnal activities, adding a layer of secrecy and rebellion to her character.
• Turning Point: In a bold move, Mirelle stealthily collects all of Cody’s discarded toys. Using the magical oil, she breathes life into one, hinting at her plan to harness the oil’s power for purposes unknown.
• Improve: To amplify intrigue, introduce a clandestine meeting between Mirelle and a figure from her past, suggesting a grander scheme involving the oil and animated beings. This meeting could be teased with cryptic dialogue, elevating the anticipation for her plans.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Layers and Reveals

What I learned doing this assignment is that it is not only important to map out WHEN we will reveal our layers but also HOW we will reveal them. The more dramatic, the better.

1) Add those Layers and Reveals to the current version of your Pilot Outline.

Teaser:

Essence: While escorting a mineworker through the forest, Urnek and his comrade are ambushed by a horde of grimlopes, shadowy creatures known for their greed.

Surface: The grimlopes attack the caravan for the gold.

Layer beneath: Turns out they abduct the mineworkers instead

How the layer is revealed: The woodsmen warriors in charge of escorting the mineworkers turn around and notice that the mineworkers are gone.

Turning Point: Breaking from their usual motive of stealing gold, the grimlopes unexpectedly kidnap the mineworker, signaling a sinister shift in their behavior.

—

Act 1:

Essence: Lambert, the town’s blacksmith, finds himself in a heated argument with Urnek regarding the town’s safety measures.

Turning Point: Amidst their dispute, the automatic cannon Lambert is repairing misfires, striking the earth and uncovering a mysterious oil that seeps out from the ground.

—

Act 2:

Surface: The sorceress seems to be appreciated by the villagers.

Layer beneath: A lot of villagers, especially the kids, fear her.

How the layer is revealed: A kid brings her a drawing. The drawing illustrates the sorceress as a scary witch who frightens the kids away. The kid who brought the drawing had done this because his friends had dared him to do so.

Surface: Silver-colored oil is seeping from the ground

Layer beneath: This oil is magical and can animate metal

How the layer is revealed: When Cody falls into the oil, it splashes onto metal pieces.

Essence: Lambert surprises his son, Cody, by completing Cody’s automatic cannon project. However, they discover the project in ruins.

Turning Point/Midpoint: Heartbroken, Cody flees and accidentally falls into the mysterious oil, causing some drops to fall on the shattered metal pieces. The pieces take a life of their own, revealing the oil’s magical properties.

—

Act 3:

Layer beneath: Combined with the sorceress’s magic touch, the oil can bring life to metal creatures

How the layer is revealed: Lambert invites Mirelle to his house. She brings life to a metal butterfly.

Essence: Seeking understanding, Lambert invites Mirelle, known for her knowledge of magic, hoping she can shed light on the oil’s power.

Turning Point: Driven by curiosity rather than caution, Mirelle animates a metal butterfly with the oil. Lambert, fearing the unknown implications, destroys the creation and bans further experimentation.

—

Act 4:

Surface: The town is inhabited by normal humans.

Layer beneath: The villagers are actually born from stones. Different stones create different stonelines and determine the role of each villager.

Surface: Ben is a thief.

Layer beneath: Both of Ben’s parent are mineworkers and they were the first to disappear 2 months ago since the mineworkers abduction started.

How the layer is revealed: Ben explains it to Nayeli.

Layer beneath: Each stone gives villagers a power and a curse.

How the layer is revealed: Ben explains it to Nayeli.

Essence: To bolster the town’s security, King Marcus decides to significantly increase the guard for the mineworkers, hoping to deter further attacks.

Turning Point: Sylvanor, the vengeful druid, observes the town’s movements through his spy bat. Seeing an opportunity, he orders his entire army to launch a surprise attack on the town, aiming to capture the mineworkers all at once.

—

Act 5:

Essence: Lambert tucks Cody into bed, reassuring him about the town’s defenses and their capability to ward off any outside threats.

Lock In: In a bold move, Mirelle stealthily collects all of Cody’s discarded toys. Using the magical oil, she breathes life into one, hinting at her plan to harness the oil’s power for purposes unknown.

2) Run it through AI

Character Layers:

Surface: Lambert is seen as a blacksmith focused solely on technological defenses.

Layer: Lambert has discovered magical silver oil but keeps it a secret.

How the layer is revealed: When the cannon misfires and uncovers the oil, Lambert’s reaction is overly cautious and secretive, hinting at his prior knowledge and plans for the oil.

Surface: Urnek is perceived as solely a brawny warrior.

Layer: He secretly hopes Lambert’s defenses fail to maintain the need for traditional warrior skills.

How the layer is revealed: Urnek’s ambivalence at the cannon misfire and subsequent discovery of the oil betrays his internal conflict and secret desire.

Surface: Nayeli is a lone nomadic archer.

Layer: Her fear of attachment stems from the loss of her tribe and family.

How the layer is revealed: Nayeli’s avoidance of forming connections in the village, coupled with a solitary moment where she interacts with a symbol or keepsake from her tribe, reveals her deeper trauma.

Surface: Mirelle is experimenting with the silver oil and magic for the town’s benefit.

Layer: She uses her experiments as a way to cope with her inability to have children.

How the layer is revealed: A moment where Mirelle is seen tenderly interacting with one of her “metal children,” juxtaposed with a private moment of sorrow, highlighting her maternal longing and the personal stakes in her experiments.

Plot Layers:

Surface: The grimlopes’ sudden interest in kidnapping mineworkers appears as a random threat.

Layer: This shift is part of Sylvanor’s scheme to undermine the village and discover the secret of the silver oil.

How the layer is revealed: A grimlope, under interrogation by Urnek or another, inadvertently reveals a clue pointing to Sylvanor’s involvement, hinting at the larger conspiracy.

Surface: The town seems united in facing external threats.

Layer: There’s an ongoing conspiracy within the town, involving the origins of the villagers and possibly the stonelines.

How the layer is revealed: A secretive meeting between elders of different stonelines discussing the recent events and their potential to expose the town’s true nature to the newer generations or outsiders.

Situation Layers:

Surface: The discovery of magical oil seems like a miraculous solution to the village’s defenses.

Layer: The oil’s magic has unforeseen consequences, possibly related to the stoneline origins of the villagers.

How the layer is revealed: An experiment gone wrong with the oil not only animates metal but also reacts unpredictably with a villager, revealing their stoneline origin and hinting at the complexity and danger of using the oil.

Surface: The village appears to be preparing adequately for the grimlopes’ attacks.

Layer: Sylvanor’s spy bat reveals that the village’s preparations are actually playing into his hands for a larger assault.

How the layer is revealed: Through Sylvanor’s perspective, watching through the bat’s eyes, the viewers learn of his larger plan, turning the village’s efforts into a trap they’ve unknowingly set for themselves.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Character Story Lines

What I learned doing this assignment is the combination of segmenting our episode in 5 acts and the character’s storylines in 3 acts seems to be really optimal.

Lambert’s Storyline:

Beginning: Lambert is a devoted blacksmith, husband, and father, whose life’s work revolves around bolstering the defenses of his village to ensure the safety of his family and fellow villagers.

Turning Point: During his work, Lambert stumbles upon a mysterious silver oil with the uncanny ability to animate metal objects, a discovery that intrigues and alarms him equally.

Midpoint: Seeking to understand this potent magic, Lambert consults with Mirelle, the village’s enigmatic elemental sorceress, hoping she can help secure the oil’s containment or neutralization.

Turning Point 2: Mirelle successfully animates a metal butterfly crafted by Lambert, revealing the oil’s remarkable potential. However, the unforeseen consequences frighten Lambert, leading him to destroy the animated creation and prohibit Mirelle to experiment further with the oil.

Major Conflict: Despite Lambert’s efforts to fortify his village against external threats, he faces an unprecedented challenge: how to shield his family from the dangers posed by the magical oil that emerges from beneath their very feet.

Ending: Secretly from Lambert, Mirelle covertly disregards his directives and animates a metal toy soldier, affectionately treating it as her ‘child’, introducing a potential threat into the village.

—

Mirelle’s Storyline:

Beginning: Mirelle, a gifted Elemental Sorceress, possesses the unique ability to imbue magical stones with life, creating villagers with varying attributes. Despite her contributions, she feels isolated, unable to create a legacy or lineage for herself due to the absence of a stone akin to her own origins.

Turning Point: As the school year closes, Mirelle is delighted when a child hands her a drawing. Initially thrilled at the thought of receiving a token of affection from a child, her joy quickly turns to sorrow when she sees the drawing portraying her as a terrifying witch, a figure of fear from whom the village children flee.

Midpoint: Lambert invites Mirelle to his home to share his discovery of a magical oil capable of animating metal, seeking her expertise and possibly her aid in understanding its properties and potential applications.

Turning Point 2: Demonstrating the oil’s power, Mirelle instil life into Lambert’s metal butterflies, showcasing her mastery and the oil’s enchanting capabilities.

Dilemma: Faced with Lambert’s prohibition against further experimentation with the oil, Mirelle is torn between her desire to explore this new magic and the respect for Lambert’s wishes, compounded by her lack of knowledge about the oil’s origins.

Major Conflict: Lambert’s edict puts Mirelle at a crossroads, challenging her pursuit of magical discovery against the backdrop of her deep-seated desire for connection and legacy within the village.

Ending: Defying Lambert, Mirelle secretly brings a metal toy soldier to life, tenderly calling it her “child.”

—

Now using AI:

Lambert

Beginning: Lambert starts as the village’s respected but overcautious blacksmith, who is currently in conflict with his son’s aspirations and concerned about the town’s reliance on traditional defenses against increasing threats.

Midpoint: The misfire incident during his argument with Urnek leads to the discovery of the mystical oil, drastically altering Lambert’s understanding and approach to the village’s defenses.

Dilemma: Lambert must decide whether to embrace the unknown possibilities of the magical oil to enhance his technological defenses or to destroy it to prevent unforeseen consequences, understanding that either decision could affect the safety and future of the town and strain his relationship with his son further.

Ending: Lambert’s life is changed as he sees the potential of merging magic with technology but is conflicted about the ethical implications and the potential danger it poses, symbolized by his reaction to Mirelle’s unauthorized experiment.

Improvement: Introduce subtle hints of Lambert’s past experiences or discoveries that make him skeptical of magic, possibly involving a previous catastrophe or loss tied to magical elements. This backstory would add depth to his caution and reluctance, making his eventual acceptance or rejection of the magical oil more meaningful.

Mirelle

Beginning: Mirelle is introduced as the village’s eccentric sorceress, deeply immersed in her experiments and somewhat distanced from the rest of the community due to her unconventional methods and secrets.

Midpoint: Her excitement over Lambert’s discovery of the magical oil represents a turning point, revealing her passion for pushing the boundaries of magic, which she sees as a chance to validate her life’s work and possibly address her personal wound of being unable to have children.

Dilemma: Faced with Lambert’s resistance and the potential risks of her experiments, Mirelle must choose between proceeding in secret to explore the oil’s capabilities (risking alienation and possible harm) or respecting Lambert’s wishes and the safety of the village, stifling her ambitions and possibly never unlocking the oil’s full potential.

Ending: The episode closes with Mirelle acting on her curiosity, using the oil to animate Cody’s toy soldier in secret, demonstrating her willingness to take risks for the sake of discovery but also setting the stage for future conflict.

Improvement: To deepen Mirelle’s character, introduce a subplot that reveals more about her emotional attachment to her magical “children” and her internal conflict over her desire for acceptance versus her need to explore the unknown. This subplot could involve a character or creation of hers facing danger or rejection, paralleling her own fears and desires, and foreshadowing the potential consequences of her experiments with the magical oil.

—

Teaser:

Essence: Lambert’s son, Cody, excitedly helps his father in the forge, hammering at a piece of metal that’s part of a new gate design, demonstrating the strong yet strained relationship between them. Meanwhile, Urnek and his comrade, deep in the forest, escort a mineworker back to the village.

Turning Point: The grimlopes’ ambush is more strategic and ferocious than ever before. As they kidnap the mineworker, Urnek notices an unusual, almost reverent behavior towards the mysterious oil seeping from the mineworker’s bag, hinting at a deeper plot.

Act 1:

Essence: The village is abuzz with preparations for an upcoming festival. Lambert, amidst organizing the defenses for the event, finds himself at odds with Urnek, who argues for more aggressive measures. The tension highlights the village’s growing fears and Lambert’s steadfast belief in his methods.

Turning Point: The misfire incident at the forge occurs not in isolation but during a demonstration of Lambert’s new defense mechanism to the village elders, causing embarrassment and a rift between Lambert and the community. The mysterious oil revealed not only intrigues Lambert but also catches the eye of a secretive figure in the crowd—Mirelle.

Act 2:

Essence: Cody, feeling overshadowed by his father’s legacy and the recent public mishap, ventures into the forest to prove his worth, only to encounter remnants of the grimlopes’ presence. His encounter leads him to the destroyed project, filled with a newfound determination to fix it.

Turning Point/Midpoint: As Cody attempts to salvage his project using the mysterious oil, not only do the metal pieces animate, but they also exhibit protective behaviors, defending him from a lurking grimlope scout. This miraculous event is witnessed by a hidden Mirelle, who sees an opportunity to merge her magic with Lambert’s technology.

Act 3:

Essence: Lambert, now ostracized by the village and struggling with his son’s defiance, reluctantly agrees to consult Mirelle, hoping her magical insight can solve the mystery of the oil and restore his standing.

Turning Point: Mirelle’s experiment with the metal butterfly goes awry when it escapes, causing a minor yet alarming incident in the village. Lambert’s public destruction of the butterfly, coupled with his ban on Mirelle’s experiments, deepens the rift between science and magic in the village, leading to public fear and intrigue about the true nature of the oil.

Act 4:

Essence: As the village fortifies itself in preparation for the festival, Sylvanor sees the discord and heightened defenses as the perfect moment to strike, planning to use the chaos of the festival as cover for his grand scheme to harness the oil for his own dark purposes.

Turning Point: A grimlope informant brings Sylvanor a vial of the oil, stolen during the earlier skirmish. Sylvanor’s experiments reveal the oil’s potential not just for animation but for control over those animated, hinting at his plan to turn the village’s defenses against itself.

Act 5:

Essence: On the eve of the festival, Lambert shares a quiet moment with Cody, attempting to mend their relationship by showing faith in Cody’s abilities and the village’s defenses. Their reconciliation is heartfelt, with Lambert revealing his fears and hopes for Cody’s future.

Lock In: In the dead of night, Mirelle, undeterred by Lambert’s warnings and motivated by her own convictions, enlists the help of her magical creatures to gather the discarded metal toys from Cody’s collection. In her hidden sanctum, she successfully animates one toy soldier with the oil, its eyes glowing ominously as it salutes her, a foreboding sign of her intentions to defy Lambert and explore the oil’s potential, setting the stage for her confrontation with both the village’s fears and Sylvanor’s upcoming assault.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Pilot Structure

What I learned doing this assignment is that a TV show episode has 5 acts and that an act ends with a turning point.

1. Present the first draft of your pilot Acts.

Teaser:

• Essence: While escorting a mineworker through the forest, Urnek and his comrade are ambushed by a horde of grimlopes, shadowy creatures known for their greed.
• Turning Point: Breaking from their usual motive of stealing gold, the grimlopes unexpectedly kidnap the mineworker, signaling a sinister shift in their behavior.

Act 1:

• Essence: Lionel, the town’s blacksmith, finds himself in a heated argument with Urnek regarding the town’s safety measures.
• Turning Point: Amidst their dispute, the automatic cannon Lionel is repairing misfires, striking the earth and uncovering a mysterious oil that seeps out from the ground.

Act 2:

• Essence: Lionel surprises his son, Cody, by completing Cody’s automatic cannon project. However, they discover the project in ruins.
• Turning Point/Midpoint: Heartbroken, Cody flees and accidentally falls into the mysterious oil, causing some drops to fall on the shattered metal pieces. The pieces take a life of their own, revealing the oil’s magical properties.

Act 3:

• Essence: Seeking understanding, Lionel invites Citrine, known for her knowledge of magic, hoping she can shed light on the oil’s power.
• Turning Point: Driven by curiosity rather than caution, Citrine animates a metal butterfly with the oil. Lionel, fearing the unknown implications, destroys the creation and bans further experimentation.

Act 4:

• Essence: To bolster the town’s security, King Marcus decides to significantly increase the guard for the mineworkers, hoping to deter further attacks.
• Turning Point: Sylvanor, the vengeful druid, observes the town’s movements through his spy bat. Seeing an opportunity, he orders his entire army to launch a surprise attack on the town, aiming to capture the mineworkers all at once.

Act 5:

• Essence: Lionel tucks Cody into bed, reassuring him about the town’s defenses and their capability to ward off any outside threats.
• Lock In: In a bold move, Citrine stealthily collects all of Cody’s discarded toys. Using the magical oil, she breathes life into one, hinting at her plan to harness the oil’s power for purposes unknown.

2. Use AI to generate a version of your 5-Act Structure.

Teaser:

Scene: Urnek, the brave but simple-hearted warrior, is escorting a miner back to camp through a dense, misty forest at dusk. The atmosphere is tense, hinting at danger lurking.

Action: Suddenly, they are ambushed by a horde of Sylvanor’s minions, eerie creatures that blend the grotesque and the mystical. A frantic battle ensues.

Twist: As Urnek fights valiantly, the miner is abducted by the creatures, disappearing into the fog. Urnek is left shouting defiantly into the night, setting a tone of danger and adventure.

1ST ACT:

World Introduction: Gemvale, a village renowned for its technological defenses against the wilderness’s dangers, thanks to Lambert’s genius. We see daily life, hinting at tensions between reliance on technology and the magical.

Character Introductions: Lambert is seen working in his forge, crafting with a mysterious silver oil. Mirelle, the sorceress, practices her magic in secrecy, hinting at her depth and motivations.

Turning Point: Lambert discovers the mystical properties of the silver oil by accident when a scrap piece animates briefly before crumbling.

2ND ACT:

Conflict Introduction: Lambert, driven by curiosity but skeptical of magic, consults Mirelle about the oil. The interaction lays the groundwork for their complex relationship, balancing skepticism with wonder.

Midpoint Build-up: The village is shown to be under constant threat from Sylvanor’s forces, emphasizing the stakes and Lambert’s motivation to protect it without resorting to magic.

Turning Point (Midpoint): Mirelle, intrigued by the oil, secretly uses it to animate one of Lambert’s child’s metal toys—a war figurine. It moves, a moment of wonder and potential.

3RD ACT:

Characters Reeling: Lambert and Mirelle debate the implications of this discovery, revealing their inner conflicts—Lambert’s fear of the unknown and Mirelle’s desire to push magical boundaries.

Deepening Layers: Their debate is interrupted by a spy bat, hinting at Sylvanor’s awareness of their experiments. This raises the stakes, showing no secret is safe.

Turning Point: Mirelle, undeterred, animates a metal butterfly, showcasing the beautiful potential of their discovery. Lambert, overwhelmed by fear of the consequences, destroys it and bans further experimentation, highlighting his inner turmoil and overcautiousness.

4TH ACT:

Major Complications: The destruction of the butterfly creates a rift between Lambert and Mirelle, each questioning the other’s motives and vision for the future.

Efforts to Resolve: They attempt to hide their discovery from Sylvanor and the village, leading to missteps that draw more attention from Sylvanor’s spies.

Turning Point: Sylvanor, intrigued by the potential of the silver oil, plans to seize it for his own dark purposes, revealing a new threat to both the protagonists and the village.

5TH ACT:

Journey Lock-In: Despite their differences, Lambert and Mirelle realize they must work together to protect their discovery from Sylvanor, setting them on a path of uneasy alliance.

Final Scenes: They secure the silver oil, hinting at future adventures and challenges in mastering its power while safeguarding it from Sylvanor.

Cliffhanger: In the final moments, Mirelle secretly creates the first metal creature, a small, lifelike animal. She looks at it with a mix of wonder and maternal affection, suggesting a new level of magical creation and hinting at deeper secrets to be explored.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Amazing Inciting Incident

What I learned doing this assignment is the concept of “lock in”. It’s true that we will be much more drawn to watching the show if we believe that all the bridges have been burned and there’s no way back for the main character.

1. What is the “Inciting Incident” of your series that this pilot needs to deliver powerfully?

The village sorceress uses a magical oil with the power to animate metal to give life to a creature made out of steel.

2. Give us the main beats of that Inciting Incident:

Intriguing Concept: A tranquil village is thrown into chaos by an infestation of bizarre, metal creatures, born from a mysterious magical oil, challenging the once serene life of its inhabitants.

Act 1: Lionel, a steadfast blacksmith with a firm belief in the might of conventional defenses—cannons, shields, and fortified gates—is a skeptic of magic, valuing the security these tangible protections promise his village over the unpredictability of sorcery.

Midpoint: Lionel’s world is upended when he stumbles upon an enigmatic, magical oil beneath the earth, possessing the uncanny ability to breathe life into metal, challenging his previously held convictions and forcing him to reconsider the role of magic in their lives.

Lock-In: The village’s equilibrium is further disrupted when the town sorceress, under the guise of experimentation, animates Lionel’s son’s war toys with the magical oil. These newly alive entities, once benign playthings, now pose an unforeseen threat from within, rendering Lionel’s meticulously constructed external defenses moot and introducing a new, internal menace to the village.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Big Picture Components

What I learned doing this assignment is that there are key components to include in our pilot. It’s not just the beginning of our story.

SERIES INFO:

• World: The enchanted town of Stonevale where villagers are born from magical gemstones
• Main mystery: A mystical oil seeps from the ground which possesses the power to breathe life into metal
• Impossible Goal: Protect the town if the enemy is already inside.
• Main Conflict: A vengeful druid wants to raid Stonevale.
• Second Mystery: How can a mere blacksmith can have his suspicions be taken seriously in a town full of overconfident warriors?
• Season 1 Arc: From different stonelines (bloodlines) not trusting and not working together to the whole town joining forces to fight the common threat.
• Season 1 Protagonist Internal Journey: From never setting foot outside the walls of his town to returning a hero from the Druid’s Citadel.

PILOT INFO:

• Pilot Conflict: A vengeful druid is abducting the town’s mineworkers.
• Main Characters Introduced: Lionel, Dreya, Urnek, the Sorceress, the Druid
• Inciting Incident of Season 1: The village sorceress brings a metal creature to life, ignoring the consequences on the town’s safety.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 3 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 3 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Edited TV Pitch Bible

What I learned doing this assignment is that no matter how many times we reread our bibles, there are issues we won’t be able to see. I find that making someone else read it and be open to feedback can greatly improve our pitch bible.

That final step transformed my document. What was once merely great has been elevated to perfection.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Episode Titles

What I learned doing this assignment is that it could be effective to use the titles to give an idea of the complete story in one glance.

Brainstorm titles:

Episode 1:

1) Conflict: Dark Elixir Rising
2) Journey: The Builder’s Inquiry
3) Dilemma: Foundations of Fear
4) Issue faced: Secrets of the Deep
5) Irony: Beneath the Construct
6) Hero’s challenging situation: Lionel’s Unsettling Find
7) Threat to hero: The Goblin Abduction
8) Discovery: The Dark Discovery
9) Metaphor: Shadows Underfoot

Episode 2:

1) Conflict: Preparing for War
2) Journey: Lionel’s Dual Battles
3) Dilemma: The Wizard’s Gamble
4) Issue faced: The Creatures’ Chaos
5) Irony: Allies or Anomalies
6) Hero’s challenging situation: A Father’s Struggle
7) Threat to hero: The Witch’s Gambit
8) Discovery: Unveiling the Army
9) Metaphor: The Dragon’s Pact

Episode 3:

1) Conflict: Greenwood Under Fire
2) Journey: Defense of the Village
3) Dilemma: To Fight or Flee
4) Issue faced: The Wall’s Breach
5) Irony: The Unexpected Savior
6) Hero’s challenging situation: Lionel’s Last Stand
7) Threat to hero: Carmela’s Onslaught
8) Discovery: The Creatures’ Valor
9) Metaphor: The Breaking Storm

Episode 4:

1) Conflict: The Hidden Saboteur
2) Journey: Lionel’s Quest for Truth
3) Dilemma: Trusting the Unseen
4) Issue faced: The Defense Dilemma
5) Irony: Allies Undone
6) Hero’s challenging situation: A Builder’s Doubt
7) Threat to hero: Invisible Manipulations
8) Discovery: The Secret Pipeline
9) Metaphor: The Unseen Hand

Episode 5:

1) Conflict: Breaching the Lair
2) Journey: Into the Dark Tunnels
3) Dilemma: Rescue or Retreat
4) Issue faced: The Fortress Trap
5) Irony: The Unwitting Army
6) Hero’s challenging situation: The Trio’s Peril
7) Threat to hero: In the Grip of the Witch
8) Discovery: Carmela’s Grand Scheme
9) Metaphor: The Spider’s Web

Episode 6:

1) Conflict: The Goblin’s Defection
2) Journey: Quest for the Boundless Striker
3) Dilemma: Greenwood or Vengeance
4) Issue faced: The Fruitless Search
5) Irony: The Unfound Weapon
6) Hero’s challenging situation: Dreya’s Doubt
7) Threat to hero: The Looming War
8) Discovery: Mash’s Change of Heart
9) Metaphor: Crossroads of Fate

Episode 7:

1) Conflict: The Final Battle
2) Journey: Lionel’s Return
3) Dilemma: Sacrifice or Survival
4) Issue faced: The Overwhelming Siege
5) Irony: The Statue’s Strike
6) Hero’s challenging situation: The Ultimate Decision
7) Threat to hero: Carmela’s Control
8) Discovery: Dreya’s Aerial Rescue
9) Metaphor: The Battle of Broken Bonds

Episode 8:

1) Conflict: The Quest for the Lost
2) Journey: Lionel’s Path to Forgiveness
3) Dilemma: Rebuild or Revenge
4) Issue faced: The Skeletons’ Challenge
5) Irony: Legacy of the Hammer
6) Hero’s challenging situation: Accepting the Warrior’s Way
7) Threat to hero: The Fractured Community
8) Discovery: Issim’s Return
9) Metaphor: The Mending Bridge

Based on all of the titles, the ones I chose are:

Episode 1: Secrets of the Deep

Episode 2: The Wizard’s Gamble

Episode 3: Greenwood Under Fire

Episode 4: The Unseen Hand

Episode 5: In the Grip of the Witch

Episode 6: Quest for the Boundless Striker

Episode 7: The Battle of Broken Bonds

Episode 8: Legacy of the Hammer

• This reply was modified 1 year, 3 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra Presents Non-Stop Intrigue

What I learned doing this assignment is that a set off has no place in a pitch bible if it doesn’t have a payoff.

I dissected every line of my pitch bible and I’m extremely proud of the result. Making every line intriguing made my pitch bible a page-turner. I can’t wait to send it out to producers.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Intrigue Patterns

What I learned in this assignment is that to create maximum intrigue, you need to find the perfect balance between the things you say, and the things you leave out.

—

The technique I used is intense language in Lionel’s description when I mention “deepest fear” and “as everything he values is destroyed”

Lionel

Lionel, a master builder in defensive architecture, has long been the unsung guardian of the Greenwood Clan. He never dared setting foot outside his beloved village. Why would he put himself at risk, venturing into the unknown, when he can surround himself with strong walls and admire his beautiful buildings? Yet, his lifestyle clashes with the dreams of his 12-year-old son, who aspires to be an adventurous warrior.

His discovery of a dark elixir, used in secret to create powerful and uncontrollable creatures, presents Lionel with a heart-wrenching dilemma: Will Lionel confront his deepest fear and step outside of his sanctuary, or will he watch from the sidelines as everything he values is destroyed?

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s TV Pitch Bible Investigation

What I learned doing this assignment is that even if we like our show as it is, it doesn’t mean it can’t get better.

The 3 places where I thought my show needed some work was:

– Urnek’s character

– Carmela’s character

– Season finale

For Urnek’s character, I asked myself “What’s beneath that” and I found an interesting new layer. Since Urnek is my simple-minded barbarian character, I kept thinking of him as being shallow. But he doesn’t need to be. So now, even though he is aware of his intellectual limitations, he secretly aspires to be Battle Chief. All of a sudden, Urnek becomes a much more complex character.

For Carmela’s character, I asked myself “What if Carmela had a sister who’s even more evil and powerful than she is?” So I created a new character: Noctura, the Night Witch.

For my season finale, I asked myself “What if this conspiracy is part of a bigger conspiracy?”. I found out that involving one more person in the conspiracy with Carmela will be the ultimate surprise during the season finale!

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Show Summary

What I learned doing this assignment is to limit our summary to only the twists, they mystery, the irony and the empathy/distress can make a much more marketable text than just listing events in chronological order.

My attempt at a one page summary of my show. I took episode 1 to 4:

In the enchanted village of Greenwood, Lionel, the dedicated Builder, leads a normal life with everyday problems: the King wants him to build strong defenses with too few resources, the villagers see him as just a mere commodity, and his son is completely disinterested in the builder’s craft, dreaming instead for the life of an adventurous warrior.

However, Lionel’s mundane existence is upended when he stumbles upon a mysterious dark elixir at one of his construction sites.

Lionel, hoping to find insight, entrusts the elixir to the village Wizard – a decision he regrets instantly. With a spell gone awry, the Wizard conjures a creature from the dark essence unlike any seen before.

Lionel’s command to cease the experiment falls on deaf ears. Behind Lionel’s back, the Wizard, blinded by curiosity, awakens more creatures, each more powerful than the last.

As these enigmatic creatures multiply and mature at an astonishing speed, Lionel’s once-reliable defenses inexplicably falter one after the other, the village Miners vanish under goblin raids, and a formidable Witch orchestrates an imminent siege. Could all of these ominous events be connected? Despite Lionel’s growing concerns, his warnings are met with derision and skepticism.

It’s only when the Greenwood clan is on the brink of war that two unlikely allies emerge: a fiery Barbarian with anger management issues and a nomadic Archer with a hidden agenda.

All hints point to the Witch’s fortress. But how could Lionel, who has never set foot outside the village gate, possibly lead a quest to the most treacherous places in the realm? With their backs against the wall, Lionel and his new companions find that sometimes, embracing the impossible is the only way forward.

And this is what AI came up with:

In the enchanted realm of Greenwood, Lionel, a builder devoted to his craft and family, discovers a mysterious dark elixir, setting off a whirlwind of adventure. Alongside Urnek, a quirky archer, and Dreya, a barbarian with a fiery spirit, they delve into a dark scheme orchestrated by a witch to overthrow their village. This revelation peels back the layers of their seemingly simple world, uncovering a web of intrigue and danger.

As Lionel navigates the complexities of fatherhood, with his son Cody eschewing the builder’s path for that of a warrior, the village faces imminent threats. The witch’s army looms large, and the unpredictable dark elixir creatures, born from the wizard Issim’s experiments, present a new form of chaos. The stakes escalate when Lionel’s inventions, Greenwood’s last hope, fail against the siege, only for an unforeseen betrayal by Scarlett, the dragon, to shift the battle’s tide.

The series deepens its mystery as Lionel discovers a force manipulating the dark elixir creatures, threatening the village’s very existence. Despite his warnings being met with ridicule, the discovery of a secret tunnel beneath Greenwood compels Lionel and his allies into the unknown. This journey, rooted in the lore of “Clash of Clans,” blends humor, camaraderie, and a quest for truth in a magical world of conflict and discovery. It sets the stage for an epic narrative of bravery, betrayal, and the enduring strength of community bonds.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Episode Descriptions

What I learned in this assignment is that 8 episodes is a lot of content!!! My episodes are only 30 minutes long and I found it challenging to find enough material to make them all as equally exciting. But in the end, I like to think that I did pretty well.

For each episode, go through the event bullet points and organize them in this fashion.

Episode 1

Hook/Intrigue: Lionel, an ordinary Builder, discovers mysterious dark liquid seeping from the ground at the crossbow construction site.

Main Character Journey: Lionel’s episode-long journey involves his investigation into the dark elixir, and the challenges of managing his relationship with his son Cody,

Major Challenge/Conflict: Lionel learns of the miners from the village, including his friends, being abducted by goblins, a sinister plot revealed through Carmela the Witch’s planning.

Action/Reaction: Lionel takes decisive action by bringing the dark elixir to Issim, the village wizard.

Cliffhanger: Issim accidentally creating a living creature from the dark elixir, while the village remains unaware of the imminent large-scale attack planned by Carmela the Witch.

Episode 2

Hook/Intrigue: Carmela prepares her forces for war against Greenwood, showcasing her goblin and skeleton troops’ progress. The scene culminates in her deal with Scarlett, a dark red dragon, highlighting her determination to overpower Greenwood’s defenses by any means necessary.

Main Character Journey: Lionel grapples with Cody’s growing interest in becoming a barbarian, contrary to Lionel’s wishes for him to follow in his footsteps as a builder.

Major Challenge/Conflict: The creation of four dark elixir creatures by Issim, revealed as toddler versions of village warriors, introduces a new dimension of chaos and responsibility for Lionel. Their inherent powers and the complexities of managing their actions pose unforeseen challenges.

Action/Reaction: Lionel’s actions throughout the episode—attempting to educate Cody, addressing the chaos caused by magical creatures, and seeking to mend village relations—highlight his proactive approach to problem-solving and conflict resolution.

Cliffhanger: As Issim puts the dark elixir creatures to bed, he reveals that tomorrow will mark their first day outside his tower.

Episode 3

Hook/Intrigue: The dark elixir creatures in Greenwood undergo an astonishingly rapid maturation, transforming from infancy to adulthood in a mere week, bringing both humor and chaos to the village’s daily life.

Main Character Journey: Lionel is faced with the escalating threat of Carmela’s army, testing his inventions and resolve as the village braces for a siege, pushing him to the forefront of Greenwood’s defense.

Major Challenge/Conflict: Carmela the Witch unleashes a full-scale attack on Greenwood, with her goblin and skeleton army breaching the village walls, creating a dire situation that demands an immediate and effective response.

Action/Reaction: In the thick of battle, Lionel’s towering robot invention fails catastrophically. However, the village is ultimately saved by the valiant efforts of the rapidly matured dark elixir creatures and an unexpected ally, Scarlett, who has a change of heart and turns against the witch.

Cliffhanger: King Marcus, thoroughly impressed by the dark elixir creatures’ prowess in battle, tasks Issim with creating as many of these powerful beings as possible, foreshadowing Greenwood’s transformation into a stronghold brimming with magical defenders.

Episode 4

Hook/Intrigue: Issim initiates an adoption campaign for the burgeoning number of dark elixir babies in Greenwood, highlighting the village’s effort to integrate these magical new residents into their society.

Main Character Journey: Lionel navigates a personal crisis as his son Cody questions his parentage amidst the discovery that the dark elixir creatures can be manipulated by an unseen force, leading him to doubt his role as both a father and protector.

Major Challenge/Conflict: Secretly, the dark elixir creatures begin tampering with Greenwood’s defenses, an ominous development perceived only by Lionel, who senses a hidden threat within his community.

Action/Reaction: At the town hall ceremony, Lionel urgently warns the villagers about the dark elixir creatures’ interference with the village defenses, only to be met with disbelief and ridicule, isolating him in his quest for truth.

Cliffhanger: Lionel’s discovery of a concealed pipeline of dark elixir suggests a clandestine manipulation beneath Greenwood. With Dreya’s support, he embarks on an investigation through a newly found tunnel, while Urnek hesitates on whether to embrace the Builder’s suspicions.

Episode 5

Hook/Intrigue: Carmela reveals her scheme to Mash: orchestrating control over Issim’s dark troops to secretly build an army inside Greenwood, with Scarlett’s defiance inadvertently solidifying the villagers’ trust, thus serving Carmela’s devious strategy.

Main Character Journey: In the depths of the dark elixir tunnel, Lionel’s bond with Dreya and Urnek strengthens over shared personal details, but their camaraderie is tested when they stumble upon the Witch’s fortress, confronting the reality of their situation.

Major Challenge/Conflict: The trio’s mission to save the captured Miners turns dire when they are caught by the Witch’s guards, showcasing the high stakes of their covert operation and the imminent danger they face.

Action/Reaction: Upon learning of intruders, Carmela and Mash retreat, revealing her remarkable endurance, while a moment of reflection for Mash exposes the deceit in their supposed alliance with Scarlett, hinting at his evolving perception of Carmela’s manipulative nature.

Cliffhanger: Lionel, Dreya, and Urnek’s attempt at a daring rescue backfires due to Dreya’s rash decision, leading to their capture, heightening the tension of their infiltration and leaving their fate uncertain as they face the Witch’s wrath.

Episode 6

Hook/Intrigue: Dreya harbors suspicions that Carmela’s malevolent forces are responsible for decimating her clan and seizing the Boundless Striker, their sacred bow, setting off a quest for retribution and recovery of the artifact.

Main Character Journey: Amidst the tension of their captivity, Lionel extends forgiveness to Dreya, putting aside his frustration to aid in her mission to retrieve the Boundless Striker, symbolizing his growing compassion and leadership.

Major Challenge/Conflict: Trapped in Carmela’s prison, Lionel and Dreya confront the harsh reality of their situation, facing a Miner who unveils the witch’s dark elixir obsession and the peril it brings to Greenwood.

Action/Reaction: Freed by Mash, Lionel insists on returning to defend Greenwood, while a contentious decision is made to pursue Dreya’s lead on the Boundless Striker, believed to be crucial in thwarting Carmela’s advancing army.

Cliffhanger: After a futile search that reveals a heavy crossbow unable to be wielded by Dreya, Lionel and Urnek, feeling their efforts squandered, hurriedly depart to catch up with Carmela’s troops, leaving behind a disheartened Dreya who doubts her role in Greenwood’s fight.

Episode 7

Hook/Intrigue: Carmela’s forces, spearheaded by Pebble’s immense size and skeletons’ suicidal tactics, breach Greenwood’s defenses, marking the beginning of a dire assault on the village.

Main Character Journey: Lionel, returning dramatically with Scarlett and the Miners, faces the ultimate test of leadership and sacrifice, particularly when forced to make a critical decision regarding Scarlett’s fate amidst the chaos.

Major Challenge/Conflict: The village faces its greatest threat as Carmela’s control over the dark troops and the dark-elixir influenced King Marcus severely demoralizes Greenwood’s defenders, pushing them to the brink.

Action/Reaction: In a desperate bid to turn the tide, Lionel and Cody, leveraging a rage potion and the village’s spring trap, orchestrate a daring counterattack, showcasing their ingenuity and courage against overwhelming odds.

Cliffhanger: Dreya’s precise intervention from the skies, activating the PEKKA statue Beatrice with the rage potion, results in Carmela’s demise, liberating Greenwood from her control. However, Issim’s coerced departure with Carmela prior to her defeat leaves Greenwood without its key defender and creator, posing new uncertainties for the future.

Episode 8

Hook/Intrigue: After the battle, the discovery that Gunthor departed with Issim and remnants of Carmela’s army, alongside Lionel’s remorse over his past actions, propels a quest to reclaim their lost comrades.

Main Character Journey: Confronted with the consequences of his actions, Lionel resolves to mend bridges by retrieving Issim and Gunthor. His journey reflects a deeper understanding and acceptance of others’ paths, including Cody’s ambitions.

Major Challenge/Conflict: Lionel, Dreya, and Urnek’s mission to bring back Gunthor and Issim is met with the immediate threat of giant skeletons. This challenge demands their combined strength and symbolizes the obstacles they must overcome to reunite their fractured community.

Action/Reaction: Upon finding Carmela’s forces, the group not only persuades Gunthor and Issim to return but also faces down the new threat of giant skeletons, showcasing their resilience and commitment to Greenwood’s safety and unity.

Cliffhanger: The episode concludes with Queen Iris receiving the sacred crossbow from Dreya, hinting at her significant role in the unfolding narrative. Meanwhile, Lionel’s gift of the Lightning Hammer to Cody, signifying his acceptance of Cody’s warrior path, prepares both characters for pivotal roles in Greenwood’s future, intertwining the fate of the village with their personal growth and contributions.

Based on the above, here are the summaries of all of my episodes.

Episode 1: The Dark Discovery

Lionel, a diligent Builder from the Greenwood clan, stumbles upon a mysterious dark elixir at a construction site, igniting his quest to understand its properties while juggling the complexities of fatherhood and the alarming news of miners abducted by goblins. The episode climaxes with Issim, the village wizard, accidentally creating a living creature from the elixir, as Carmela the Witch plans her attack on their village.

Episode 2: The Wizard’s Gamble

As Carmela allies with Scarlett, the dark red dragon, to besiege Greenwood, Lionel faces a personal dilemma as his son Cody aspires to become a warrior instead of a builder. The tension intensifies with Issim’s creation of three more dark elixir creatures, even mightier than the first one. The wizard is now ready to let his creations leave his tower and reveal them to the world, setting the stage for unforeseen consequences.

Episode 3: Greenwood Under Fire

Greenwood faces its darkest hour as Carmela’s forces breach its walls. Lionel’s inventions falter in the face of war, but an unexpected turn of events with the dark elixir creatures and Scarlett, the dragon’s betrayal of Carmela, saves the day. Moved by this valor, King Marcus commissions Issim to create more dark elixir creatures, marking a new era for the village’s defense.

Episode 4: Chains Unseen

As Greenwood adapts to its new magical residents, Lionel discovers a mysterious force controlling the dark elixir creatures to sabotage the village defenses. At the town hall ceremony, Lionel urgently warns the villagers about his suspicions, only to be met with disbelief and ridicule. The revelation of a secret tunnel beneath Greenwood launches Lionel, Urnek, and Dreya on a stealth mission to uncover the source of this covert manipulation.

Episode 5: The Witch’s Fortress

The trio’s journey into the dark elixir tunnels reveals Carmela’s insidious plan to covertly amass an army within the village itself. Their bond deepens as they navigate the perils of the witch’s fortress, only to be captured by her guards in a daring attempt to rescue the abducted miners. The episode climaxes with their failed escape, leaving them at the mercy of the witch’s wrath.

Episode 6: The Quest for the Boundless Striker

Dreya’s personal vendetta against Carmela for decimating her clan intertwines with Lionel’s mission. When Mash, a goblin disillusioned by Carmela’s betrayal of his trust, sets Lionel, Urnek, and Dreya free, they face a critical choice. Instead of rushing to Greenwood’s aid, they decide to seek Dreya’s clan enchanted bow to bolster their defenses. But their quest proves fruitless, compelling them to confront Carmela’s forces unarmed, leaving Dreya questioning her place in Greenwood’s future.

Episode 7: The Battle of Broken Bonds

Carmela’s siege brings Greenwood to its knees, with Lionel making a pivotal decision that alters the course of the battle. Utilizing clever tactics, Urnek’s brute force and Dreya’s infallible aim, they manage to defeat Carmela, but Issim’s abduction poses a new threat to Greenwood’s future, leaving the village vulnerable and uncertain.

Episode 8: Legacy of the Hammer

In the aftermath of battle, Lionel’s quest to retrieve Issim becomes a journey of redemption. Facing new threats, Lionel, Urnek, and Dreya secure their comrades’ return, reinforcing Greenwood’s unity. The discovery of Queen Iris’s connection to Dreya and the gifting of the Lightning Hammer to Cody symbolize new beginnings. This episode sets the stage for future challenges, showcasing the evolving roles of its key defenders.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 3 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 3 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Episode List Rough Draft

What I learned doing this assignment is that AI is not great when it comes to generate creative ideas when our ask is too broad. The list of episodes it gave me were all very plain.

For each episode, list the main events of that episode in bullet points.

—

Episode 1

– One more Miner is abducted by the Goblins.

– Lionel the Builder discovers the dark elixir that seeps from the ground in their village.

– Issim the Wizard creates one creature from the dark elixir

– Dreya the Archer arrives in the village

– Carmela the Witch is spying on the village. She plans to attack the village to abduct all the Miners at once.

—

Episode 2

– Issim creates 3 more creatures from the dark elixir, all larger than the first one.

– Larry the Skeleton introduces a new weapon to Carmela

– Carmela and her goblins visit Scarlett the dragon to ask her to side with them

– Dreya infiltrates the Artifact Chamber of the castle.

—

Episode 3

– A whole week passes. The dark elixir creatures grow.

– Carmela and her army attack the village

– The dark elixir creatures help Greenwood overcoming the witch’s attack.

– Scarlett the Dragon decides to switch side and fights along side Greenwood.

– Carmela and her army retreat. The abduct the Golem, one of the dark elixir creature, on their way out of the village.

– The King asks Lionel to make as many dark elixir creatures as he can.

– Queen Iris asks Dreya to teach her how to use a bow and arrow.

—

Episode 4

– The dark elixir creatures are given in adoption because there are too many.

– Queen Iris continues her training with Dreya.

– Cody learns that Lionel is not his real father.

– Lionel witnesses that the dark elixir creatures are sabotaging a cannon.

– It is revealed that Carmela can control those creatures.

– Lionel tries warning everyone about this impending danger but nobody believes him.

– Wanting to find the source of the dark elixir, Lionel digs. He find a tunnel. He decides to follow it. Urnek the barbarian and Dreya the archer decide to go along with him.

—

Episode 5

– Lionel, Urnek and Dreya discover that the tunnel leads into Carmela’s fortress.

– Mash goes to kill Scarlett who betrayed them but has a change of heart because he finds out that the Dragon has three babies

– Lionel, Urnek and Dreya find the prison where the Miners are locked up.

– After a fight, they get caught and are imprisoned too.

—

Episode 6

– Carmela comes to visit the trio in jail.

– Carmela reveals her plan to Mash the Goblin, telling him she played everybody, including him.

—

Episode 7

– Carmela’s troops start marching toward Greenwood.

– Mash frees Urnek, Lionel, and Dreya

– Dreya convince them that the enchanted bow is the solution to defeat the witch’s army.

– They find the bow, which is a crossbow in the end. Dreya discovers she can’t use it.

– Lionel and Urnek feel like they’ve wasted their time. They leave. Dreya stays behind.

—

Episode 8

– Carmela attacks the village and, by taking control of all of the dark elixir creatures, she overcomes everybody.

– Scarlett comes to help but she is killed.

– Dreya shows up at the last minute to save the day.

– Lionel finally finds a way to make his PEKKA robot to work. Lionel, Urnek and Dreya defeat Carmela together.

– Cody passes a test to become a barbarian. Everybody is there to cheer for him.

—

What AI came up with:

Episode 1:

Teaser: Another miner is abducted by goblins, stirring fear in the village.

Main Character journey: Lionel, the village builder, investigates the recent abductions, determined to find a solution.

Major Challenge/Conflict: The village is on edge as rumors of goblin attacks spread.

Midpoint: Lionel discovers a hidden cave where the goblins are staging their raids.

Action/Reaction: Lionel rallies the villagers to fortify defenses and prepares to confront the goblins.

Cliffhanger: As Lionel leads a rescue mission into the goblin cave, they encounter unexpected resistance.

—

Episode 2:

Teaser: The rescue mission faces unexpected dangers within the goblin cave.

Main Character journey: Lionel grapples with the reality of the goblin threat and his responsibility to protect the village.

Major Challenge/Conflict: The rescue team battles goblin traps and ambushes deep within the cave.

Midpoint: Lionel and the team find the abducted miners, but they’re outnumbered by goblin forces.

Action/Reaction: A fierce battle ensues as the rescue team fights to escape the cave with the miners.

Cliffhanger: Just as they think they’ve escaped, they encounter a massive goblin war party blocking their path.

—

Episode 3:

Teaser: Lionel returns to the village with the rescued miners, but tensions rise as the threat of goblin attacks looms large.

Main Character journey: Lionel grapples with the weight of leadership and the fear of failing his village.

Major Challenge/Conflict: The villagers demand action against the goblins, but Lionel must find a way to defend without escalating into all-out war.

Midpoint: Lionel seeks counsel from Issim, the village wizard, who reveals secrets about the goblins’ motivations.

Action/Reaction: Lionel and Issim devise a plan to secure the village while uncovering the source of the goblins’ elixir.

Cliffhanger: As Lionel and Issim delve deeper into their investigation, they stumble upon a dark alliance between the goblins and a powerful sorceress named Carmela.

—

Episode 4:

Teaser: Lionel and Issim confront Carmela, but she unleashes dark magic to thwart their efforts.

Main Character journey: Lionel grapples with the realization that the goblin threat is part of a larger, more sinister plot.

Major Challenge/Conflict: Carmela’s magic proves formidable as she summons monstrous creatures to attack the village.

Midpoint: Lionel and Issim must find a way to counter Carmela’s magic and protect the village from her dark forces.

Action/Reaction: The villagers join forces with Lionel and Issim to defend against Carmela’s onslaught, but they’re overwhelmed by her power.

Cliffhanger: Just when it seems all hope is lost, a mysterious figure emerges from the shadows, offering unexpected assistance against Carmela’s forces.

—

Episode 5:

Teaser: The mysterious figure reveals herself as Dreya, a skilled archer and warrior, with her own vendetta against Carmela.

Main Character journey: Lionel and Dreya form an uneasy alliance as they prepare to confront Carmela together.

Major Challenge/Conflict: Carmela launches a full-scale assault on the village, testing Lionel and Dreya’s newfound partnership.

Midpoint: Lionel taps into his ingenuity as a builder to devise traps and defenses against Carmela’s forces.

Action/Reaction: The battle rages on as Lionel, Dreya, and the villagers fight tooth and nail to repel Carmela’s invasion.

Cliffhanger: In the midst of the chaos, Carmela reveals her true objective: to recruit Issim to her cause and unleash untold chaos upon the world.

—

Episode 6:

Teaser: Issim faces a moral dilemma as Carmela offers him power in exchange for betrayal.

Main Character journey: Issim struggles with the temptation of dark magic and the consequences of his choices.

Major Challenge/Conflict: Lionel and Dreya must convince Issim to resist Carmela’s offer and stand with them against the darkness.

Midpoint: Issim grapples with his inner turmoil, torn between loyalty to his friends and the allure of unlimited power.

Action/Reaction: Lionel and Dreya embark on a dangerous quest to retrieve a legendary artifact that could turn the tide against Carmela.

Cliffhanger: As Lionel and Dreya confront Carmela in her lair, Issim arrives, his allegiance uncertain, poised to tip the scales in a decisive moment.

—

Episode 7:

Teaser: The final showdown between Lionel, Dreya, and Carmela unfolds in a climactic battle of magic and might.

Main Character journey: Lionel confronts his deepest fears and doubts as he faces off against Carmela, knowing that the fate of the village hangs in the balance.

Major Challenge/Conflict: Carmela unleashes all her dark powers in a bid to destroy Lionel and claim victory.

Midpoint: Lionel taps into his inner strength and resourcefulness, using his skills as a builder to outmaneuver Carmela’s attacks.

Action/Reaction: Dreya fights by Lionel’s side, her arrows striking true as they push back against Carmela’s onslaught.

Cliffhanger: In a desperate gambit, Lionel unleashes the ultimate weapon against Carmela: the PEKKA, a towering war machine of his own design. But as the battle reaches its climax, a shocking revelation threatens to shatter their hopes of victory.

—

Episode 8:

Teaser: The village reels from the aftermath of the battle as Lionel and Dreya confront the consequences of their actions.

Main Character journey: Lionel reflects on the lessons learned and sacrifices made throughout their journey, grappling with the weight of leadership and the cost of war.

Major Challenge/Conflict: With Carmela defeated, a new threat emerges as another enemy threatens to tear the village apart from within.

Midpoint: Lionel and Dreya must rally the villagers once more, uniting against a common foe and forging a new path forward.

Action/Reaction: As tensions rise and loyalties are tested, Lionel and Dreya must rely on their bond and the strength of their community to overcome the challenges ahead.

Cliffhanger: Just when it seems peace has been restored, a figure emerges from the shadows, revealing themselves as a harbinger of even greater danger lurking on the horizon.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Five Seasons

What I learned doing this assignment is that a show with only one season is not profitable for a network. That’s why they’re looking for shows that have the potential to last beyond 2 or 3 seasons.

5 SEASON SUMMARY

Season 1: Dawn of the Dark Elixir

Discovering dark elixir, Lionel, Dreya, and Urnek confront malevolent witch Carmela and her hordes of goblins and skeletons. The dark elixir’s power and mystery set the stage for future conflicts, leaving the village on edge.

Season 2: Path of the Archer Queen

Queen Iris rises as the Archer Queen. Her mastery of the enchanted crossbow becomes crucial as the village faces a new menace: an enemy clan’s Inferno Tower. Their victory opens a path to uncharted adventures, deepening the saga.

Season 3: Clashmas Chronicles

The festive season in Greenwood Village is overshadowed by a chilling mystery as the Headhunter begins targeting villagers. Lionel, Dreya, and Urnek’s investigation into these disappearances takes them on a journey through holiday-themed lands, where they encounter mythical allies like Ice Golems and Yetis.

Season 4: The Builder’s Odyssey

Cody’s desire to forge his own path leads him and his companions to an uncharted island, rich with ancient secrets and destined to become the site of a new village. Cody’s decision to remain as the Master Builder marks the birth of a new community.

Season 5: The Root of All Battles

An environmental crisis threatens Greenwood Village, compelling Lionel and his allies to seek the ancient wisdom of the Root Riders. Their efforts to restore balance reveal a deeper threat, challenging their relationship with the natural world.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Character Descriptions

What I learned doing this assignment is that leaving some character traits and intrigue open ended in the description makes our character appear even more intriguing.

Select a main character and answer the following questions:

—

Lionel

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Intriguing Concept and World

What I learned doing this assignment is that finding a unique subworld worth exploring is of utmost importance for seeing our show produced and aired on TV.

Present your Concept.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP has completed the BW Framework and is ready for feedback!

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Creating Irony!

What I learned doing this assignment is that irony is a great way to create surprises in our story. We have to be careful not go against our character’s nature either. If we keep using irony to make our character do the opposite than what he’s supposed to do, then we will confuse the viewer who will wonder who this character really is.

ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show

The show I chose is SUPERNATURAL S1E11: Scarecrow

Irony during the show:

– A newlywed couple are grateful that locals have helped them out when they got lost and stopped for gas, only to be killed by a monster in an orchard.

– Sam and Dean’s dad calls them to ask them not to look for him. Sam understands this message thinking that their dad needs help so he does the opposite of what his dad said and he goes to look for him

– Sam meets a woman who is hitchhiking. When she goes into the truck of a shady man, Sam tells her to be careful. We eventually see that the most dangerous person is the woman because she ends up killing the driver to drain him from his blood.

– Dean tries to protect a couple by warning them they are in danger only to make them scared of him and not trusting him.

– Dean saves a couple from being attacked by the monster. The townspeople know that they need a human sacrifice so that the monster continues to protect their village so they abduct Dean and plan to use him as a human sacrifice.

– The monster is actually a god. To keep protecting the town, he needs the townspeople to offer him the life of a man and a woman every year.

– They need to burn a tree to get rid of the go. Burning the tree will save innocent couples from getting killed once a year but it will destroy the town.

—-

ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show

1. Look back through your previous assignments and find at least 10 different situations or character components that you could go opposite to create irony.

– Urnek starts a bush fire to keeps his son from danger, only to be caught himself in the middle of the fire he created himself.

– Urnek sets a horse loose to prevent goblins from stealing the cart but the horse he freed almost tramples his son.

– Lionel ducks to avoid a pillow thrown by Urnek, but the pillow lands on the trigger of a crossbow which starts firing at the hospital.

– Lionel wants to surprise his son by showing him the finished crossbow, making his last day of school one of the most beautiful day of his life. But when he removes the tarp, he reveals a completely destroyed crossbow, making his son experience one of the worst day of his life.

– To save his village from being destroyed by the witch’s army, he unleashes an invention he’s been working on for years, only to see it completely inoperative after the witch shocked it with a thunderbolt.

– Carmela seeks a dragon’s help to win against Greenwood but during the battle, the dragon turns against her army and makes them retreat.

– Dreya has searched for the magical crossbow all her life, but when she finds it, she struggles operating it.

– The goblins carefully plan to restrain and kill an full-grown dragon to steal her treasure only to see their plan fail because they had not taken into account the dragon’s babies.

– Urnek’s simple mind often prevents him from coming up with complex strategies so for one scene, he could end up coming up with one.

– Dreya avoids any kind of close attachments but eventually risks her life to save the people who became their friends.

—-

With AI, use a prompt to generate even more ways to use irony.

Plot Irony

1. Builder Saves the Day: The ultimate defense against Carmela’s magical army comes from Lionel’s non-magical inventions, emphasizing the irony of simple engineering triumphing over complex sorcery.

Character Irony

2. Carmela’s Reluctant Ally: Carmela, who despises the simplicity and crudeness of non-magical beings, finds her most reliable ally is a straightforward barbarian turned spy within her ranks, contrasting her complex magical schemes with his simple yet effective espionage.

Relationships Irony

3. Archer and Barbarian Bond: Dreya, who values precision and stealth, forms an unlikely bond with Urnek, whose approach is all about brute force, illustrating the irony in their effective partnership despite contrasting fighting styles.

Situational Irony

4. The Peaceful Warrior: Urnek, known for his love of battle, becomes the key advocate for a diplomatic solution to avoid conflict with Carmela, highlighting the irony of a warrior pushing for peace.

Cover-ups Irony

5. Secrets Unveiled by Accident: Lionel’s secret projects aimed at defending the village are accidentally unveiled by Carmela’s clumsy minions, ironically leading to a stronger village defense preparedness.

Layers Irony

6. Ancient Magic for Modern Problems: The villagers find an ancient magical artifact that Lionel integrates into a modern trap, combining old sorcery with new technology, ironically bridging the gap between past wisdom and present innovation.

Actions Irony

7. Destroy to Protect: In an effort to protect the village, Lionel ends up demolishing a significant part of it with one of his inventions gone awry, ironically becoming a temporary destructor to be a savior.

Dialogue Irony

8. Carmela’s Misjudgment: Carmela dismisses the villagers’ efforts to stop her with contempt, only to find her plans thwarted by those very efforts, leading to ironic statements about underestimating her opponents.

Dramatic Irony

9. The Audience Knows: Viewers are aware that Dreya’s long-lost crossbow, which Carmela seeks to destroy, actually lacks the power she fears; it’s the unity of the village that’s the real threat, creating a layer of dramatic irony as characters scramble for an artifact with misunderstood significance.
10. Hidden Affections: The audience knows that Lionel harbors feelings for Dreya, who remains oblivious as she focuses on her quest, adding a layer of romantic irony, especially when she interprets his actions as purely strategic.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 4 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

4 lead character profiles completed!!!

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Plot and Character Layers

What I learned doing this assignment is that we need much more than 2 or 3 layers to keep the viewer engaged. 4 would be the minimum but we should actually aim for 5+.

ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show

The show I watched is SUPERNATURAL S1E10

PLOT LAYERS – Story beneath the story.

• Plot surface: Sam and Dean’s mom was killed by a demon when they were young. More recently, their father disappeared and Sam’s girlfriend was killed the same way that his mother was.
• Major shift in Meaning: The mother comes back as a spirit to fight off off an evil spirit who took over their family house.
• Hidden history: Sam confides he’s had visions of his girlfriend getting killed by a demon. He now knows his vision were premonitory and feels guilty to not have done anything to save her.
• Hidden plan: The father has not been killed or abducted like we thought. He is in hiding and purposely avoid contacting his sons.

<strong style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; color: var(–bb-body-text-color);”>CHARACTER LAYERS – identity beneath the identity.

• Surface: Sam is a normal college student
• Secret identity: Sam is a monster hunter
• Character intrigue: He has premonitory visions and could have saved his girlfriend. He uses this knowledge to save other people.
• Hidden Character history: He has not been pursuing the monster hunter path because he was tired of being a “freak”

ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show

Discover the layers that could exist for your show.

1. Brainstorm a list of possible PLOT layers.

PLOT LAYERS – Story beneath the story.

• Major scheme revealed
• Mystery revealed
• Thought the story was one thing, but it is another
• Major shift in Meaning
• Hidden history
• Hidden plan
• Major betrayal

2. Brainstorm a list of possible CHARACTER layers.

CHARACTER LAYERS – identity beneath the identity.

• Secret identity
• Character intrigue
• Hidden relationships and conspiracies
• Hidden Character history

3. Organize them each into a possible sequence of reveals.

Plot Surface:

• Layer 1: A serial killer goes after all of the hispanic homeless men
• Layer 2: He is looking to kill one in particular
• Layer 3: The one he wants to eliminate is a threat to all jumpers.
• Layer 4: A jumper who wanted to exposed all other jumpers “jumped” in the body of the homeless man.
• Layer 5: The homeless man they are looking for is Finch.

Character Surface:

• Layer 1: Eliza is head of the squad who hunts jumpers.
• Layer 2: She has a special arrangement with a jumper she keeps alive to get information.
• Layer 3: The jumper used to be her husband, before he was jumped.
• Layer 4: He was jumped because of her. She feels guilty about it.

4. Use this prompt with AI to see what kinds of layers it brainstorms. When you list the characters, include the one or two things that are most intriguing about them.

PLOT LAYERS:

Major scheme revealed:

Beneath the surface, it’s revealed that the jumpers are part of a larger network orchestrated by a secret society seeking to manipulate humanity’s destiny.

Mystery revealed:

The true origin of the curse plaguing Finch is unveiled, exposing a centuries-old pact made with dark forces that threatens to consume him entirely.

Thought the story was one thing, but it is another:

Initially believed to be unrelated, the jumpers’ killings are discovered to be part of a ritualistic plot to awaken an ancient entity that could reshape reality.

Major shift in Meaning:

The team realizes that their fight against the jumpers is not just about saving lives but preventing a cataclysmic event that could bring about the end of the world as they know it.

Hidden history:

A hidden history between Cornelius and Eliza is revealed, showing their past collaboration and shared experiences that shaped their conflicting ideologies.

Hidden plan:

Unbeknownst to the team, Isabella has been secretly working on a plan to capture and rehabilitate the jumpers instead of eliminating them, leading to tension and conflict within the group.

CHARACTER LAYERS:

Secret identity:

Finch discovers that Cornelius has been hiding his true identity as a powerful ghost, complicating their already strained relationship.

Intrigue layers:

Isabella’s true motivations for joining the ghost-hunting team are unveiled, revealing a personal vendetta against the jumpers stemming from a tragic event in her past.

Hidden relationships and conspiracies:

Angela’s connection to a government official involved in the deportation threats against her family is revealed, hinting at a larger conspiracy to dismantle their lives.

Hidden Character history:

Eliza’s traumatic past as a survivor of a jumper attack is brought to light, shedding new light on her relentless pursuit of justice against the jumpers.

Hidden Agenda:

Finch harbors a hidden agenda to find a cure for his curse, even if it means risking the safety of his team and delving into dark and dangerous territory.

Wound:

Angela’s deep-seated resentment towards Finch for abandoning their family in their time of need is exposed, adding a layer of emotional conflict to their already fraught relationship.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Big Picture Open Loops

What I learned in this assignment is that mysteries are about the past and open loops are about future. I had never thought of it that way!

ASSIGNMENT 1

The show I watched is SUPERNATURAL S1E9.

Big picture open loops:

– Who killed Dean and Sam’s mother?

– What happened to their father?

– Who killed Sam’s girlfriend?

– Will Sam accept to go back to being a Monster Hunter or will he finish his degree?

ASSIGNMENT 2:

1. Use this list to brainstorm big picture open loops for your first season that you will use to keep the audience captivated.

GOALS:

• Will they discover who the Street Cleaner was and why he was targeting hispanic homeless men?

CONSEQUENCES:

• Will Finch become a killer because of the jumpers trapped inside of him?
• Will Eliza get caught for working with her ex-husband who became a jumper?

SOLVING PROBLEMS:

• Will Finch or Finch’s sister be deported?

RELATIONSHIPS:

• Will Finch’s sister forgive Finch for giving up on her and on society?

DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:

• Will Eliza’s squad members survive going after the most dangerous serial killers?
• Will Finch be strong enough to fight everything he’ll have to go through to fight his inner demons (sleeping pills, lack of sleep, isolation, etc.)?

2. Run it through AI

GOALS:

New goals?

Isabella discovers a mysterious connection between her family’s dark past and the jumpers they hunt.

Goals related to the big picture?

Eliza receives an encrypted message hinting at a grand conspiracy linking jumpers to a powerful organization.

Crushed goals?

Cornelius fails to break his curse, leading to increasing desperation and a search for alternative solutions.

Competition/conflict around goals?

Finch discovers a fellow jumper hunter with conflicting motives, sparking a rivalry within the team.

CONSEQUENCES:

Are they going to be caught?

Eliza’s secret collaboration with Cornelius is on the brink of exposure, risking the agency’s trust.

Problems created from past actions?

Angela’s deportation threat intensifies, pushing Finch into a dilemma: break the law to save his sister or stay true to his ghost-hunting mission.

Good plans gone wrong?

Isabella’s attempt to save a specific jumper inadvertently unleashes unforeseen chaos and consequences.

SOLVING PROBLEMS:

What is the major problem for this character?

Finch faces a new breed of jumpers, posing a unique challenge that pushes the team’s abilities to the limit.

What are they trying to solve?

Isabella seeks a way to permanently eliminate the jumpers without resorting to killing, leading to ethical dilemmas.

Major change imposed on character?

Angela discovers her family’s supernatural connection and is forced to confront the existence of the paranormal.

Previous solutions cause new problems?

Eliza’s deal with Cornelius to gather intelligence results in unintended consequences, putting her team at risk.

RELATIONSHIPS:

Relationships in peril?

Finch and Isabella’s friendship is strained as they grapple with conflicting views on dealing with jumpers.

New relationships forming?

Angela befriends a mysterious ally who may hold the key to her family’s predicament.

Conflict inside relationships?

Tensions rise within the team as secrets come to light, testing their loyalty and unity.

Relationships changing?

Cornelius reveals a personal connection to Eliza, altering the dynamics of their partnership.

DANGER/SURVIVAL/RISKS:

Can they survive X?

The team faces a deadly ritual orchestrated by a powerful jumper cult, putting their lives on the line.

Putting themselves in danger/making dangerous decisions?

Eliza takes extreme measures to uncover the truth behind the jumpers’ origin, jeopardizing her safety.

Who else is pulled into their danger?

Isabella’s family becomes a target of a vengeful jumper seeking retribution for her interference.

Internal dangers (drug addiction, need for medicine, inner demons)?

Finch battles increasing mental instability as the jumpers’ souls inside him intensify their control during the night.

3. Tell us your top Big Picture Open Loops that could be in your pilot.

– Finch battles increasing mental instability as the jumpers’ souls inside him intensify their control during the night.

– Will Finch expose Eliza and Cornelius’s secret past?

– Will they discover who the Street Cleaner was and why he was targeting hispanic homeless men?

– Will Angela get deported?

– Will Angela forgive Finch for giving up on her and on society?

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Show Mysteries

What I learned doing this assignment is that we need more than one big mystery to keep the viewer engage and that those mysteries need more than one layer.

ASSIGNMENT 1:

The show I chose is SUPERNATURAL S1E8

The big picture mysteries are:

– Who killed Sam and Dean’s mother and why

– Why did their father disappear? Where is he?

The episode mysteries were:

– Why are the insects starting to kill humans?

– Why are they targeting the family and the people working closely with the real estate developers?

ASSIGNMENT 2:

Create two mysteries for your show — one that shows up strong in the Pilot and the other that is revealed over time.

1. Create your Shocking Event Mystery and tell us the WWWWW and H, along with the part withheld.

• A. Shocking Event: A serial killer tries to murder Finch, a homeless man but is killed first by police forces. When he dies, his soul “jumps” into the homeless man.
• B. Secret: Who is this serial killer and why does he eliminate homeless man? What kind of power does the serial killer hold on Finch’s body now that his soul is inside him?
• C. Investigation: The investigation is conducted by a squad specialized in supernatural event, especially the ones that involve “jumpers”, the people with the power to transfer their soul when they die.
• WWWWW and How: Who: The street cleaner; What: Killing homeless men; When: In the middle of the night, Where: In alleys where nobody goes; How: He injects a drug that kills them, making it look like an overdose
• Part Withheld: Why is the serial killer targeting homeless men?

2. Create the Over Time Mystery and tell us the WWWWW and H, along with the part withheld.

• A. Cover up: Finch has a power to absorb souls
• B. Secret: The soul he absorbs take control of him when he sleeps.
• C. Reveals: He acts like the killers
• WWWWW and How: When: At night, How: He locks himself in a cage to not roam free; Who: The multiple killers inside of him; Where: Close to where he sleeps; What: He goes after the victims the killers were after.
• Part Withheld: The street cleaner is not the first soul Finch absorbs. He knew about his power before.

—

Use these two prompts to generate a list possible mysteries:

Corporate Conundrum:

Mystery: Eliza uncovers a connection between a powerful corporation and the jumpers, revealing a clandestine plot for financial gain.

Consequences: Exposing the corporation’s involvement may trigger retaliation, endangering the team.

Political Pawns:

Mystery: A high-profile politician is suspected of being a jumper, leading to a political conspiracy that jeopardizes the team’s investigation.

Consequences: Unraveling the political web risks exposing the team to powerful adversaries.

Inheritance Intrigue:

Mystery: Isabella’s investigation into a wealthy family reveals their ties to the jumpers, unraveling a family legacy of dark dealings.

Consequences: Isabella must navigate family dynamics while confronting the consequences of their actions.

Corporate Espionage:

Mystery: Felix’s gadgets malfunction during a mission, leading to the discovery of a rival ghost-hunting corporation sabotaging their operations.

Consequences: The team must outsmart their corporate rivals to protect their methods and technology.

Criminal Mastermind:

Mystery: The team discovers a criminal mastermind orchestrating the actions of jumpers for personal gain, posing a threat to the city.

Consequences: Taking down the mastermind puts the team in the crosshairs of a formidable adversary.

Family Feud:

Mystery: A family feud intertwined with the jumpers’ activities comes to light, revealing a complex web of revenge and betrayal.

Consequences: The team must navigate the intricacies of family politics to resolve the mystery.

Political Machinations:

Mystery: Eliza is drawn into a political conspiracy involving influential figures using the jumpers for personal agendas.

Consequences: Unmasking the political players may lead to dangerous consequences for Eliza and the team.

Wealthy Benefactor:

Mystery: The team gains a wealthy benefactor with mysterious motives, prompting an investigation into their connections to the jumpers.

Consequences: Relying on the benefactor’s resources may come at a price that challenges the team’s integrity.

Dynastic Secrets:

Mystery: The team delves into the secrets of a powerful dynasty, uncovering a history of manipulation and control over the jumpers.

Consequences: Exposing the dynasty’s involvement may lead to a clash with entrenched powers.

Corporate Alliance:

Mystery: A corporate alliance orchestrates the jumpers’ activities to manipulate markets and gain influence, threatening the city’s stability.

Consequences: Exposing the alliance may provoke a powerful response, putting the team at the center of a corporate war.

Mystery 1 – Opening Shocking Event Mystery:

A. Shocking Event:

A series of high-profile individuals are mysteriously found dead, each marked with an otherworldly symbol.

B. Secret:

The killings are connected to an ancient family feud with ties to the city’s political elite, using dark arts to settle old scores.

C. Investigation:

Eliza discovers a hidden world of family rivalries, secret alliances, and forbidden magic, forcing her team to navigate a treacherous landscape to uncover the truth.

Mystery 2 – Over-Time Mystery:

A. Cover up:

Finch’s ability to absorb jumper souls is linked to a hidden society within the city, manipulating him for their own purposes.

B. Secret:

The society seeks to control and weaponize Finch’s unique power, exploiting the curse for personal gain and political influence.

C. Reveals:

As Finch peels back the layers, he stumbles upon a secret pact between influential figures, shaping the city’s destiny through occult practices, revealing a clandestine war for power that extends beyond the realm of the living.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Show Empathy/Distress

What I learned doing this assignment is that AI does not always give us very specific ideas and that’s ok. Even if it provides us only with a broad idea, it can fuel our imagination to find an approach that will be used over multiple scenes or episodes.

—

ASSIGNMENT 1:

The show I chose is SUPERNATURAL S1E7.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Show Relationship Map

What I learned during this assignment is that I need more diverse relationships between my characters to make my show interesting. The relationships I had before were too conventional.

ASSIGNMENT 1:

The show I watched was SUPERNATURAL S1E6

MAIN CHARACTER – DEAN WINCHESTER

RELATIONSHIP SURFACE

Dean – Sam: Brothers

Dean – Becky: Strangers

RELATIONSHIP COMMON GROUND

Dean – Sam: Same occupation, looking for their dad

Dean – Becky: Want to find who framed Becky’s brother

RELATIONSHIP CONFLICT

Dean – Sam: Dean is jealous that Sam has friends

Dean – Becky: Becky doesn’t trust Dean after he lied about being a detective.

RELATIONSHIP HISTORY

Dean – Sam: They grew up and trained together

Dean – Becky: None

RELATIONSHIP SUBTEXT

Dean – Sam: Sam has friends and other interest. Dean doesn’t

Dean – Becky: Dean is attracted to her

RELATIONSHIP ARC

Dean – Sam: Sam gets to know what his brother is really thinking when the Shapeshifter accesses Dean’s thoughts

Dean – Becky: Distrustful to trustful.

—

MAIN CHARACTER – SAM WINCHESTER

RELATIONSHIP SURFACE

Sam – Dean: Brothers

Sam – Becky: College friends

RELATIONSHIP COMMON GROUND

Sam – Dean: Same occupation, looking for their dad

Sam – Becky: Want to find who framed Becky’s brother

RELATIONSHIP CONFLICT

Sam – Dean: Dean is jealous that Sam has friends

Sam – Becky: Becky doesn’t trust Sam after he lied about his brother being a detective.

RELATIONSHIP HISTORY

Sam – Dean: They grew up and trained together

Sam – Becky: They were classmates and became good friends.

RELATIONSHIP SUBTEXT

Sam – Dean: Sam has friends and other interest. Dean doesn’t.

Sam – Becky: Helping Becky is a way for Sam to reconnect with the normal life he had.

RELATIONSHIP ARC

Sam – Dean: Sam gets to know what his brother is really thinking when the Shapeshifter accesses Dean’s thoughts.

Sam – Becky: Distrustful to trustful.

ASSIGNMENT 2:

1. Create a Relationship Map for THREE lead characters from YOUR SHOW IDEA.

MAIN CHARACTER – FINCH CALLOWAY

RELATIONSHIP SURFACE

Finch – Eliza: Eliza is Finch’s boss

Finch – Isabella: Colleagues

Finch – Felix: Colleagues

RELATIONSHIP COMMON GROUND

Finch – Eliza: Find out why the Street Cleaner was going after the homeless man

Finch – Isabella: Deal with Finch’s curse

Finch – Felix: Find effective technologies so that Finch doesn’t need to use his power

RELATIONSHIP CONFLICT

Finch – Eliza: Eliza puts Finch in danger for the greater good.

Finch – Isabella: Isabella wants Finch to open up to her but she’s really secretive about herself.

Finch – Felix: Felix thinks Finch is a liability.

RELATIONSHIP HISTORY

Finch – Eliza: None

Finch – Isabella: None

Finch – Felix: None

RELATIONSHIP SUBTEXT

Finch – Eliza: They’re completely opposite but they need each other.

Finch – Isabella: Isabella is really fragile but she is the one protecting Finch

Finch – Felix: Finch doesn’t approve that Felix does this job and puts his family in danger

RELATIONSHIP ARC

Finch – Eliza: They learn how to work together.

Finch – Isabella: Isabella ends up trusting Finch enough that she tells him her secret.

Finch – Felix: Felix ends up framing Finch

—

MAIN CHARACTER – ELIZA THORNFIELD

RELATIONSHIP SURFACE

Eliza – Finch: Eliza is Finch’s boss

Eliza – Isabella: Eliza is Isabella’s boss

Eliza – Felix: Eliza is Felix’s boss

RELATIONSHIP COMMON GROUND

Eliza – Finch: Find out why the Street Cleaner was going after the homeless man

Eliza – Isabella: Make the agency successful

Eliza – Felix: Make the agency successful

RELATIONSHIP CONFLICT

Eliza – Finch: Eliza puts Finch in danger for the greater good.

Eliza – Isabella: They don’t agree with the way Finch should be used during mission

Eliza – Felix: Felix doesn’t agree with Eliza to side with Cornelius

RELATIONSHIP HISTORY

Eliza – Finch: None

Eliza – Isabella: Eliza recruited her while Eliza was struggling as medium

Eliza – Felix: Eliza recruited Felix because he was looking for a purpose in life

RELATIONSHIP SUBTEXT

Eliza – Finch: They’re completely opposite but they need each other.

Eliza – Isabella: Eliza wishes she’d have Isabella’s power

Eliza – Felix: Eliza tells Felix the least information as possible

RELATIONSHIP ARC

Eliza – Finch: They learn how to work together.

Eliza – Isabella: Eliza learns to accept she can’t do it all.

Eliza – Felix: Eliza learns to trust Felix.

—

MAIN CHARACTER – ISABELLA VALE

RELATIONSHIP SURFACE

Isabella – Finch: Colleagues

Isabella – Eliza : Eliza is Isabella’s boss

Isabella – Felix: Colleagues

RELATIONSHIP COMMON GROUND

Isabella – Finch: Deal with Finch’s curse

Isabella – Eliza : Make the agency successful

Isabella – Felix: They don’t like that Eliza sides with Cornelius

RELATIONSHIP CONFLICT

Isabella – Finch: Isabella wants Finch to open up to her but she’s really secretive about herself.

Isabella – Eliza : They don’t agree with the way Finch should be used during mission

Isabella – Felix: Their approach in dealing with problems. Isabella follows her instinct while Felix is more pragmatic.

RELATIONSHIP HISTORY

Isabella – Finch: None

Isabella – Eliza : Eliza recruited her while Eliza was struggling as medium

Isabella – Felix: They were hired at the same time.

RELATIONSHIP SUBTEXT

Isabella – Finch: Isabella is really fragile but she is the one protecting Finch

Isabella – Eliza : Eliza wishes she’d have Isabella’s power

Isabella – Felix: Competition

RELATIONSHIP ARC

Isabella – Finch: Isabella ends up trusting Finch enough that she tells him her secret.

Isabella – Eliza : Eliza learns to accept she can’t do it all.

Isabella – Felix: Felix understands Isabella’s behavior when her secret comes out.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 4 months ago by  Jean-Pierre Serra.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Character Emotions

What I learned doing this assignment is that discovering who our characters are early on in the development of the show will help us be consistent when writing our scenes later on.

ASSIGNMENT 1: Example Show

The show I’m watching is SUPERNATURAL. I’m at S1E5

SAM’S PROFILE

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Intriguing Character Layers

ASSIGNMENT 1:

My example show is SUPERNATURAL. The episode I watched is S1E4.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

JP Serra’s Engaging Main Characters

What I learned doing this assignment is a character doesn’t necessarily need to be likable so that we care about him/her.

ASSIGNMENT 1:

The show I watched is Supernatural, S1E3.

Sam Winchester fits the model.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

What I learned doing this assignment is that to avoid being overwhelmed, it’s ok to be superficial when we first create our characters. Depth can come later.

ASSIGNMENT 1:

Watch the next episode of your Example Show to see how the characters fit into these three circles.

The episode I watched is S1 E2 of SUPERNATURAL

A. Main Characters Circle: Sam and Dean Winchester

B. Connected Circle: Haley, Wendigo (beast in the forest), Tommy (Haley’s brother who disappeared)

C. Environment Circle: Ranger, Ben (Haley’s brother), scout, Tommy’s friends

Give us a quick list for each circle.

ASSIGNMENT 2:

1. Create the three circles of characters for your show.

• A. Main Characters Circle: Finch Calloway, Eliza Thornfield, Isabella Vale, Felix Harper
• B. Connected Circle: Cornelius Grimshaw
• C. Environment Circle: Cops, homeless, serial killers, doctors, victims

2. Give us a one sentence description of each of the Main Characters.

Finch Calloway: Homeless, immune to being possessed by ghost, street smart

Eliza Thornfield: Ex-cop and leader of the ghost hunter squad

Isabella Vale: Eccentric medium who can read ghosts as much as humans

Felix Harper: Ex-military and engineer, cartesian and by the book.

3. After you create your version, use this prompt with AI to have it create a version:

. Main Characters:

1. Eliza Thornfield

   • Unique Role: Leader of the ghost hunter squad.
   • Secret or Intrigue: Possesses a mystical artifact that enhances her paranormal abilities, hidden to protect the team.

2. Finch Calloway

   • Unique Role: Immune to body-switching magic, absorbs souls.
   • Secret or Intrigue: Discovers the curse’s true origins link to his own forgotten past, haunting his nights.

3. Isabella Vale

   • Unique Role: Medium with the ability to communicate with spirits.
   • Secret or Intrigue: Harbors a telepathic connection with the prime serial killer, struggling to control the invasive thoughts from the malevolent entity.

4. Felix Harper

   • Unique Role: Engineer building ghost hunting weapons.
   • Secret or Intrigue: Conceals a lost love’s tragic demise, motivating his relentless pursuit to eradicate paranormal threats.

B. Connected Characters:

1. Detective Victor Draconis

   • A relentless investigator who crosses paths with Eliza’s team, skeptical of their paranormal methods but intrigued by their results.

2. Lucinda Hale

   • A mysterious informant with ties to the occult underground, assisting the team in exchange for protection against a common enemy.

3. Cornelius Grimshaw

   • A wealthy and influential figure who harbors a dark secret, entangled with the cursed souls’ malevolent agenda.

4. Seraphina Moon

   • A rogue medium with her own agenda, occasionally aiding Eliza’s team but harboring a hidden vendetta.

5. Punk Hacker Echo

   • A rebellious hacker Finch befriended in his homeless days, providing unconventional tech support and a connection to the city’s underbelly.

C. Environment Characters:

1. Medical Examiner Jasper Slate
2. Police Captain Evelyn Quinn
3. Tech Support Analyst Riley Tech
4. Ghostly Informant Whisper
5. Café Owner Aurora Wellspring

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

What I learned doing this assignment is that likability in the characters is not what matters the most. Most importantly, our characters need to be interesting, multi-layered, and intriguing.

The binge-worthy show I chose is SUPERNATURAL.

PILOT OUTLINE

1. Flashback from 22 years ago. They introduce the family: John and Mary Winchester, and their two sons, Dean (4 y.o.) and Sam (baby). During the night, Mary, the mother, is brutally murdered by what seems to be supernatural forces. Her husband looks up to see his wife pinned to the ceiling, her belly sliced open and bleeding. Her body bursts into flames.

2. Present days. Sam (now 22 y.o.) goes to a Halloween party with his girlfriend. He mentions an interview he has on Monday for law school.

3. Later that night, Sam is in bed with Jess when he hears someone break in. He fights the shadowy intruder until he realizes that it is Dean (26 years old now), his older brother. They haven’t seen each other for two years. Dean explains he needs Sam’s help to find their dad because he went missing after going on a ‘hunting trip.’ Sam asks what their dad was hunting and Dean opens his car trunk and shows newspaper clips. He explains men are vanishing from their cars on Centennial Highway. Sam reminds Dean if he goes, he has to be back by Monday for his law school interview.

4. In California, a teenager is driving down the road when he sees a woman in white standing alone in the dark. He pulls over and she gets in. She acts seductively, teasing the guy and asking him to go home with her. Once on a bridge, the car stops, Troy screams and blood splatter in the windshield.

5. The next day, Dean and Sam arrive at the bridge where the guy’s car crashed the night before and lots of cop cars. Dean pulls up and takes out a fake ID and the two brothers’ question the cops posing as US Marshals. The cop says he knew the latest victim, named Troy and that his girlfriend is putting up missing posters, but they have no leads to his whereabouts.

6. Downtown, Dean and Sam find Amy, Troy’s girlfriend. She explains he last spoke on his cell from his car. Rachel, Amy’s friend, is there too and brings up a local legend about a girl who died on Centennial Highway whose ghost hitchhikes and the drivers who has picked her up disappears.

7. Dean and Sam search the net for news items concerning deaths on Centennial. They discover an article about a woman who committed suicide by jumping off a bridge after her 2 kids drowned mysteriously.

8. Dean and Sam go to check out the bridge where Constance and Troy died. Suddenly, they spot a ghostly woman in white jump from the bridge and a few minutes later Dean’s car starts on its own and tries to knock them down. The brothers fortunately survive the encounter.

9. Dean and Sam book into the same hotel their dad was in and check out his room. There is a salt circle in front of the door, so John tried to keep something out. He also left all his stuff in the room. There are pictures stuck to the walls and Sam notices their dad had solved the puzzle. Dean says dad would have destroyed Constance’s corpse and Sam says maybe the ghost has another weakness.

10. Outside the hotel, Dean is going for food when the cops arrest him for impersonating a US Marshal. He does manage to call Sam first warning him to run for it.

11. At the police station, Dean gets interrogated and is told he’s a suspect in the men’s disappearances. The sheriff shows Dean his dad’s diary and asks what the numbers in it mean. Dean seems surprised to see them.

12. Sam visits Constance’s husband and asks if John was here, Mr. Welch says, that John was there 3 or 4 days ago. Sam also asks him where Constance is buried and what happened back in 1981. Constance was buried at their old house. Sam fathoms out Joseph was unfaithful and suggests in temporary insanity, Constance killed her kids and herself when she found out, thus becoming a ‘woman in white.’ She now kills unfaithful men on the highway.

13. The sheriff’s interrogation of Dean is interrupted by an emergency call and he leaves Dean cuffed to the desk. Dean picks the cuffs locks with a paperclip and escapes.

14. Sam drives to the old Welch house where Constance is buried. The woman in white appears in front of Sam’s car and he drives right through her. The next minute, the woman in white is in the car with Sam, asking to be taken home. When he refuses, she takes control of the car and it drives on its own.

15. The car stops in front of the car Constance says she can never go home. Constance jumps on Sam intent on making him unfaithful, but he refuses to give into her seduction. She starts to hurt him and she transforms into real, grotesque features as Sam screams. Then, Dean comes to the rescue, shooting at the spook. The distraction gives Sam enough time to drive the car straight into the house, taking Constance’s spirit with him. Constance’s dead kids’ show up. Constance was too scared to face her children because of the guilt of what she did. The kids take their mom’s spirit back with them to the netherworld.

16. Back at the university, Sam seems happy to be home. Sounds coming from the shower makes him feel Jessica is probably home. He lies down but blood splatters on him. He is horrified to see Jessica pinned to the ceiling in the same way as his mother. She bursts into flames and Dean appears at the right moment and rescues Sam. As the fire is doused down by the fire engines, Dean and Sam pack their stuff on to the car and Sam ends by saying “We got work to do.”

THE 5 STAR POINTS

1. Big Picture Hooks: Two brothers follow their father’s footsteps as hunters, fighting evil supernatural beings of many kinds, including monsters, demons, and gods that roam the earth.
2. Amazing and Intriguing Character: Since they were little, Dean and Sam have be trained by their dad to be skilled monster hunters. They own a wide range of unique weapons and are keen on using any means possible to get the information they need, including taking fake identities
3. Empathy / Distress: They have lost their mother when they were very young. Their father disappeared. Dean has kept working with his father but Sam wanted a new life. After Sam’s girlfriend is killed the same way his mother was, he doesn’t have any choice but get back in the family “business”.
4. Layers / Open Loops: Will the two brothers find who (or what) killed their mother and Sam’s girlfriend? Will they find their dad? Will Sam accept to work with his brother as a monster hunter?
5. Inviting Obsession: How will the two brothers find their dad with their very limited ressources and no other clue than their dad’s diary? Once they will have found their dad, if they do, will they be able to find out who (or what) killed their mother and Sam’s girlfriend?

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

Hello dear classmates,

My name is Jean-Pierre Serra but you can call me JP. I’m from Montreal, Canada.

I have written a 6-episode web series which I produced and directed. I have also written an animated feature film based on a video game and a short movie.

I’ve always been fascinated by great TV show and what I wish to get out of this class is to find out what makes them successful so that I can write one myself.

Something unique about me? I run marathons and I love multi-day hiking trips.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

Jean-Pierre Serra

I agree to the terms of this release form.

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

Hi Marie,

Thanks for you email address. I’ll send you my framework with pleasure.

You can email me your framework at jpserra@experience7.ca

Have a good evening,

JP

[Jean-Pierre Serra]

Hi Moses,

Sure. You can email me your framework at jpserra@experience7.ca

I’ll do the same. I see you’ve put your email address in the replies.

Thanks,

JP