Julian Brantley
Forum Replies Created
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Julian’s Character Death Track
What I learned doing this assignment is that who lives and who dies can be made more compelling for story reasons.
SURVIVORS LIST –
(Camping Family)
Dad: Survivor. Rescuer. Minister. Trying to have a fun family time after daughter caught smoking pot.
Mom: Survivor. Trying to be peacekeeper, but sick of it for last 17 years.
Daughter: Survivor. Rebel, goes against father’s wishes, but in horror situations, remembers teachings and keeps it together. Smart.
Young Son: Survivor. Moral one. Follows dad’s teachings. Knows what he should do.
(Young couple)
Woman: Survivor. Lovers. Boyfriend never listens to her complaint. He doesn’t listen in horror situation and dies.
INTERNET CELEB FOLLOWERS –
(Local Mountain Followers)
20’s, Man: Survivor. The dumb one. But only one in friend group that lives.
(City Followers)
20’s Complainer: Survivor. Constant complaining is annoying, but saves her.
20’s Loner/Introvert: Survivor. Gets trapped with tough guy, who tries to sacrifice him. Gets away and rejoins others. Helps as part of team to escape.
PLOT/OUTLINE with DEATH LIST
ACT 1
Atmosphere of Evil established: FLASHBACK to murder of Gold Miner and his family. His angry spirit torments his murderers until they die. Priest and local Shaman trap spirit inside the mine.
Horror Situation: Menacing Stranger – In Prologue, stranger meets Miner’s wife and kid. Find out stranger killed them.
Reaction: Fight. Miner gets killed too.
Horror Situation: Murderer is attacked and chased by ghost of Miner.
Reaction: Denial – Can’t believe in ghost, it’s just his nerves… until it kills him.
Character Death 1: Gold Miner’s Daughter. She gets a gun and tries to shoot bandits attacking her mother. Misses them. Is shot by bandits.
Why: The most innocent person is first to die. Shows that anything goes, no one is safe.
How: They shoot her in front of her mother.
Character Death 2: Gold Miner’s Wife. Tries to protect daughter while husband in the mine. Strangled by bandit.
Why: Another innocent.
How: Strangled by bandits for trying to protect her daughter.
Character Death 3: Gold Miner and dog: Dog alerted inside mine. Then Gold Miner hears gunshot and runs out of mine. Goes into shack, sees dead family. Drops pick axe and runs to them. Bandits kill him with his own pick axe. Dog attacks them and is shot dead.
Why: This is the birth of the monster. Vengeance will bring his ghost back to haunt his family’s murderers and beyond.
How: Surprised, blind-sided. Pick axe through the back. Dog shot and killed.
Character Death 4: Murderer 1: Bandit. Take over house, eat prepared dinner with bodies still strewn about. Go into mine. See cart full of gold ore. Follow past deep pit with rope system to offshoot tunnels. Sees Gold Miner in cave with him, thinks it’s another, but recognizes as the man they killed. Ghost has gore and torn clothes where pierced by pick axe. Pit rope system moves on its own, wraps around his neck and drags him into pit, where he is hung.
Why: Revenge for killing family.
How: Poltergeist/Spirit of Gold Miner wraps rope around neck and hangs him.
Character Death 5: Murderer 2: Bandit. Sees partner murdered, tries to run away. Ghost follows, causes mining equipment to fall and crush him.
Why: Revenge.
How: After escapes from mine and thinks is safe, equipment falls on top of him, crushing him, but not killing him. He will die slowly under rubble.
(Ghost goes back to shack, realizes he’s a ghost, screams and the shack falls down on the family’s dead bodies.)
Connect with the characters: Meet the campers (Family, young couple) before their campground is invaded by Internet Celeb and his followers that are going to spend the night in a haunted mine. Only a few of them are outdoorsy, most are city kids. <div>
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The characters are warned not to do it: Dad of the family learns what the group is there to do and warns against it. Abandoned mines are dangerous, and tells his kids to stay away from them.
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Denial of Horror: When some start to consider the warning, Internet Celeb laughs and dares his followers to go with him or he will out them as scared babies.
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Safety taken away: They open the mine, and toss aside the Talisman that was keeping the ghost trapped inside. An ominous noise and wind blast hits them when it is released.
Horror Situation: Doing something forbidden – Discarding Talisman that protects the world from angry ghost.
Reaction: Denial – they think it’s no problem, just superstition.
Monster: The nature of the beast: Inside the mine, the group comes across the bones of the first victims of the Ghost Gold Miner and/or his family.
Horror Situation: Unknown motive – No one knows anything of ghost except for legend. But then they find bones of Miner’s family, so story might be true.
Reaction: Try to solve it – They think maybe acknowledging it could save them. It just infuriates the ghost.
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: The entrance to the mine collapses, trapping everyone inside.</div><div>
Horror Situation: No escape or their escape route has been cut off – Mine entrance collapses.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Some try and move stones. Some look for an alternate exit.
Horror Situation: Trapped – Cave-in on one of the kids.
Injured, wounded, or debilitated – kid’s leg hurt in cave-in.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Dig them out of rubble. Temporary fix of leg.
Horror Situation: Another character loses it (hysterical) – Claustrophobic person snaps after cave-in.
Reaction: Denial – Won’t accept their (temporary) fate.
Horror Situation: Impending doom – Worrier brought gas detection monitor. It goes off. They only have so much time before they die anyway if don’t get out.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Try to find way out of labyrinth.
Horror Situation: Internal conflict in the group – Internet Celeb loses control of group early on. Physically stronger people vie for control and decision making.
Reaction: Splits group apart.
One of us killed: Internet Celeb’s girlfriend is first to be attacked and murdered by ghost, sending everyone scattering through the mine.
Horror Situation: See another killed.
Reaction: Hide and Escape – Kids run away from murder scene blindly, getting lost.
Horror Situation: Lured into the horror – First person to see ghost – hears something, sees a comforting image that turns into Ghost Miner.
Reaction: Escape – runs from frightening image.
Character Death 6: 21, Girlfriend of Celeb: “It can’t hurt us. It’s just a ghost.” First in modern day group to die. Obnoxious character. Ghost murders her with his real, rusted pick axe through the head.
Why: Now we know it can kill with physical objects. Not just supernatural/psychological horror.
How: As everyone runs screaming, she stands her ground, not afraid of ghosts. It brutally and graphically kills her with a pick axe through head.
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought!: They realize ghost can kill them.
Full pursuit by the killer: The ghost chases people through mine and brutally kills several.</div><div>
Horror Situation: Working with someone, then they become the evil one – Guy that takes control decides to offer a sacrifice to the ghost.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Group rises up and attacks the ‘Leader’, stopping him from leaving injured person to die.
Horror Situation: Lost – Can’t find way out of Mine Labyrinth.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Find another way out.
Horror Situation: Monster approaching – Someone trapped, see the ghost advancing on them. They can hear the ghost roaming the Mine tunnels.
Reaction: Hide – Try to escape detection by ghost.
Character Death 7: Prepared Spelunker: Has tons of survival equipment, gas monitor, satellite phone, etc. 2nd to die. Ghost drags him to a deep pit and he falls a hundred feet to his death, breaking his neck. All equipment gone.
Why: Increases horror – well-prepared with everything to save them all, but dies anyway.
How: Dragged into hundred foot pit, breaking neck.
Character Death 8: Tough Guy/Sacrificial Lamb: Tries to sacrifice Introvert, ends up being crushed by mine cart full of gold ore.
Why: Bad person. Attempt to sacrifice Introvert fails.
How: Crushed under the gold he was excited to find.
Character Death 9: Claustrophobic: Leg trapped in mine entrance cave-in. Friends leave him when ghost comes. Gets crushed to death.
Why: Claustrophobia horror. Trapped in smaller and smaller spaces.
How: Tries to free leg, but ends up collapsing more around him, until he is crushed by the rocks. Ironically, the second cave-in actually opens a way out of the mine again.
(Local Kids)
Character Death 10: 20’s, Man: Hell Hound ghost eats his entrails after mauling.
Why: One of the strongest, well-equipped to survive, dies.
How: Eaten by ghost dog and accidentally killed by friend with a pick axe.
Character Death 11: 20’s, Woman: Tries to murder Hell Hound attacking friend, but ends up plunging pick axe into friend’s body only, killing him. Then, Ghost Miner picks her up, and runs her face along the top of the rocky cavern. At end of tunnel, her face is rubbed off, she’s bleeding to death in pain.
Why: Shock scare on the heels of another death. Unexpected.
How: Face ripped to shreds on rock, dies blind and bleeding from what’s left of face, scaring other survivors.
Terrorized: Father realizes his kids are trapped inside mine with people getting murdered. / Internet Celeb barely escapes death by sacrificing others.</div><div>
Horror Situation: Tricked – Celeb tricks follower into getting attacked by ghost so he can escape.
Reaction: Escape – uses follower death to run away.
Character Death 12: 20’s Innocent: Has a crush on Celeb. Is tricked by him into revealing herself to ghost to save him. She falls for it and is brutally murdered. Ghost leads her to an area with gas – starts a spark and she is consumed in flames in an explosion.
Why: Tricked by Celeb, show how awful he is to person we think is main character. She survives through most of the horror by being innocent, but that is also what kills her.
How: Burns to death in mine explosion.
ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
Fight to the death: Kids of the family fight back against the ghost and get hurt, but are still alive.
Horror Situation: Mentally tortured – Ghost plays with people before attacking/murdering them.
Reaction: Fight and Hide – Some pray to fight back, others run and hide. It chases the runners.
Hysteria: The survivors group together, trapped in the furthest reaches of the mine, and discover the bones of what used to be the Gold Miner.
Horror Situation: Being lured into danger – Kids follow light at end of tunnel, but it is the ghost.
Reaction: Hide and Escape – try to get away from ghost.
(Internet Celeb)
Character Death 13: 18, Boy: Leader. Cause. He tricks others into doing things that help him survive. Just as he is about to make it out alive, he is killed by ghost. Chains wrap around him and he’s pulled back over mine cart tracks. Mine cart derails as it decapitates him.
Why: He is a terrible person that caused original problem and got others killed.
How: Decapitated on mine cart track.
The thrilling escape from death: Father of family unblocks collapsed mine entrance and goes after kids. The group is able to escape.</div><div>
Horror Situation: Monster trying to get to you – Family son escaping, gets to entrance, but is caught by ghost. He grabs the discarded Talisman, and that shields him from the ghost. But it still tries to attack from all sides.
Reaction: Escape and Fight – Try to get away, but can’t, until he realizes Talisman keeps ghost from harming him.
Death returns to take one or more: The ghost is able to follow them outside, and all are pursued through the woods again, killing a few more.
Horror Situation: Out of the frying pan and into the fire – The ghost is let loose on the world. Goes after Couple and Mother of family.
Reaction: Escape and Fight – Try to survive ghost attack.
Horror Situation: Environment changing around you – When chasing people in the woods, ghost can control bushes and tree branches to impede their progress.
Reaction: Escape – try to run away and change directions – but leads one to the edge of a cliff and they fall.
(Young Couple)
Character Death 14: Man: Lovers. Ignores girlfriend and runs into woods, dies by falling off cliff.
Why: Character flaw of never listening to girlfriend.
How: Chased and falls from cliff to his death on the rocks below.
Resolution: Kid remembers the Talisman on the mine entrance, and with Father’s help, puts it back and traps the ghost again.</div><div>
Horror Situation: Father and Son get it to follow them back to mine to try and stop it/trap it.
Reaction: Fight – Try to trap it in Mine again with Talisman.
END.
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Julian’s Horror Situation Track
What I learned doing this assignment is where the horror is (and isn’t) in this plot.
ACT 1
Atmosphere of Evil established: FLASHBACK to murder of Gold Miner and his family. His angry spirit torments his murderers until they die. Priest and local Shaman trap spirit inside the mine.<div>
Horror Situation: Menacing Stranger – In Prologue, stranger meets Miner’s wife and kid. Find out stranger killed them.
Reaction: Fight. Miner gets killed too.
Horror Situation: Murderer is attacked and chased by ghost of Miner.
Reaction: Denial – Can’t believe in ghost, it’s just his nerves… until it kills him.
Connect with the characters: Meet the campers (Family, young couple) before their campground is invaded by Internet Celeb and his followers that are going to spend the night in a haunted mine. Only a few of them are outdoorsy, most are city kids. </div><div>
The characters are warned not to do it: Dad of the family learns what the group is there to do and warns against it. Abandoned mines are dangerous, and tells his kids to stay away from them.
Denial of Horror: When some start to consider the warning, Internet Celeb laughs and dares his followers to go with him or he will out them as scared babies.
Safety taken away: They open the mine, and toss aside the Talisman that was keeping the ghost trapped inside. An ominous noise and wind blast hits them when it is released.
Horror Situation: Doing something forbidden – Discarding Talisman that protects the world from angry ghost.
Reaction: Denial – they think it’s no problem, just superstition.
Monster: The nature of the beast: Inside the mine, the group comes across the bones of the first victims of the Ghost Gold Miner and/or his family.
Horror Situation: Unknown motive – No one knows anything of ghost except for legend. But then they find bones of Miner’s family, so story might be true.
Reaction: Try to solve it – They think maybe acknowledging it could save them. It just infuriates the ghost.
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: The entrance to the mine collapses, trapping everyone inside.
Horror Situation: No escape or their escape route has been cut off – Mine entrance collapses.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Some try and move stones. Some look for an alternate exit.
Horror Situation: Trapped – Cave-in on one of the kids. Injured, wounded, or debilitated – kid’s leg hurt in cave-in.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Dig them out of rubble. Temporary fix of leg.
Horror Situation: Another character loses it (hysterical) – Claustrophobic person snaps after cave-in.
Reaction: Denial – Won’t accept their (temporary) fate.
Horror Situation: Impending doom – Worrier brought gas detection monitor. It goes off. They only have so much time before they die anyway if don’t get out.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Try to find way out of labyrinth.
Horror Situation: Internal conflict in the group – Internet Celeb loses control of group early on. Physically stronger people vie for control and decision making.
Reaction: Splits group apart.
One of us killed: Internet Celeb’s girlfriend is first to be attacked and murdered by ghost, sending everyone scattering through the mine.
Horror Situation: See another killed.
Reaction: Hide and Escape – Kids run away from murder scene blindly, getting lost.
Horror Situation: Lured into the horror – First person to see ghost – hears something, sees a comforting image that turns into Ghost Miner.
Reaction: Escape – runs from frightening image.
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought!: They realize ghost can kill them.
Full pursuit by the killer: The ghost chases people through mine and brutally kills several.
Horror Situation: Working with someone, then they become the evil one – Guy that takes control decides to offer a sacrifice to the ghost.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Group rises up and attacks the ‘Leader’, stopping him from leaving injured person to die.
Horror Situation: Lost – Can’t find way out of Mine Labyrinth.
Reaction: Try to solve it – Find another way out.
Horror Situation: Monster approaching – Someone trapped, see the ghost advancing on them. They can hear the ghost roaming the Mine tunnels.
Reaction: Hide – Try to escape detection by ghost.
Terrorized: Father realizes his kids are trapped inside mine with people getting murdered. / Internet Celeb barely escapes death by sacrificing others.
Horror Situation: Tricked – Celeb tricks follower into getting attacked by ghost so he can escape.
Reaction: Escape – uses follower death to run away.
ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
Fight to the death: Kids of the family fight back against the ghost and get hurt, but are still alive.
Horror Situation: Mentally tortured – Ghost plays with people before attacking/murdering them.
Reaction: Fight and Hide – Some pray to fight back, others run and hide. It chases the runners.
Hysteria: The survivors group together, trapped in the furthest reaches of the mine, and discover the bones of what used to be the Gold Miner.
Horror Situation: Being lured into danger – Kids follow light at end of tunnel, but it is the ghost.
Reaction: Hide and Escape – try to get away from ghost.
The thrilling escape from death: Father of family unblocks collapsed mine entrance and goes after kids. The group is able to escape.
Horror Situation: Monster trying to get to you – Family son escaping, gets to entrance, but is caught by ghost. He grabs the discarded Talisman, and that shields him from the ghost. But it still tries to attack from all sides.
Reaction: Escape and Fight – Try to get away, but can’t, until he realizes Talisman keeps ghost from harming him.
Death returns to take one or more: The ghost is able to follow them outside, and all are pursued through the woods again, killing a few more.
Horror Situation: Out of the frying pan and into the fire – The ghost is let loose on the world. Goes after Couple and Mother of family.
Reaction: Escape and Fight – Try to survive ghost attack.
Horror Situation: Environment changing around you – When chasing people in the woods, ghost can control bushes and tree branches to impede their progress.
Reaction: Escape – try to run away and change directions – but leads one to the edge of a cliff and they fall.
Resolution: Kid remembers the Talisman on the mine entrance, and with Father’s help, puts it back and traps the ghost again.
Horror Situation: Father and Son get it to follow them back to mine to try and stop it/trap it.
Reaction: Fight – Try to trap it in Mine again with Talisman.
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Julian’s Horror Plot
What I learned doing this assignment is what characters can be combined to streamline the plot.
ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil established: FLASHBACK to murder of Gold Miner and his family. His angry spirit torments his murderers until they die. Priest and local Shaman trap spirit inside the mine.<div>
Connect with the characters: Meet the campers (Family, young couple) before their campground is invaded by Internet Celeb and his followers that are going to spend the night in a haunted mine. Only a few of them are outdoorsy, most are city kids.
The characters are warned not to do it: Dad of the family learns what the group is there to do and warns against it. Abandoned mines are dangerous, and tells his kids to stay away from them.
Denial of Horror: When some start to consider the warning, Internet Celeb laughs and dares his followers to go with him or he will out them as scared babies.
Safety taken away: They open the mine, and toss aside the Talisman that was keeping the ghost trapped inside. An ominous noise and wind blast hits them when it is released.
Monster: The nature of the beast: Inside the mine, the group comes across the bones of the first victims of the Ghost Gold Miner.
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: The entrance to the mine collapses, trapping everyone inside.</div>
One of us killed: Internet Celeb’s girlfriend is first to be attacked and murdered by ghost, sending everyone scattering through the mine.
<div>
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought!: They realize ghost can kill them.
Full pursuit by the killer: The ghost chases people through mine and brutally kills several. </div><div>
Terrorized: Father realizes his kids are trapped inside mine with people getting murdered. / Internet Celeb barely escapes death by sacrificing others.
ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
Fight to the death: Kids of the family fight back against the ghost and get hurt, but are still alive.</div>
Hysteria: The survivors group together, trapped in the furthest reaches of the mine, and discover the bones of what used to be the Gold Miner.
The thrilling escape from death: Father of family unblocks collapsed mine entrance and goes after kids. The group is able to escape.
Death returns to take one or more: The ghost is able to follow them outside, and all are pursued through the woods again, killing a few more.
Resolution: Kid remembers the Talisman on the mine entrance, and with Father’s help, puts it back and traps the ghost again.
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Julian’s Characters for Horror
What I learned doing this assignment is what type/tone of horror to aim for with the Dying Pattern question.
CONCEPT: Ghost of a gold miner terrorizes campers.
GROUP: Thrill Seekers. An internet celebrity and his followers. (Also, Social Groups – other families and couples are camping nearby and get caught up in the terror.)
DYING PATTERN: A. 6 to 8 characters together and get killed off one by one.
CHARACTERS:
Leader: Internet Celebrity that convinces his followers to meet him for ‘Night in a Haunted Mine’. He opens the mine but has no idea of the consequences.
Rescuer: Experienced Ghost Hunter that sees what is happening online and comes to the mine to help.
Innocent: Fan of celeb. Not outdoorsy. Has a crush that keeps them from making rational decisions.
Out of control / Obnoxious: Celeb’s partner. They don’t want to be there and let everyone know it. Has a competing Tik Tok account. (The first to die.)
Love Interest or lovers: Couple that are camping nearby. Thought time alone might help relationship.
Complainer: Friend of Innocent that tagged along for safety, but hates every second. Complaining keeps saving their life.
Rebel / Rule Breaker: Daughter of family camping nearby. Goes off with Celebrity group in the mine against parent’s wishes. Has to take younger brother with her.
Introvert / Loner: Celebrity follower. Only there for the ghost hunting, doesn’t interact with others. Doesn’t know what to do now that it is after them. Realizes they need others for help to escape.
Moral One: Younger brother of Rebel / Rule Breaker. They have to tag along with older sister and keeps telling her what she shouldn’t do.
Monster Bait: Several other online followers that live nearby. Excited that they got to meet a celebrity, and the only ones that know anything about the outdoors.
The Carrier: The one who brings the horror to the group: (Same as Leader.)
Sacrificial Lamb: ‘Tough Guy’ that tries to sacrifice the Introvert, but ends up becoming the sacrifice instead.
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Julian’s Terrifying Monster
What I learned doing this assignment is the villain’s strengths and weaknesses, something I wasn’t thinking about before.
1. The Gold Miner – A vengeful ghost that is released from its prison.<div>
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2.
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Their Terror: He has the properties of a ghost – can become invisible, move objects violently, follow through walls. If it can’t kill you it will haunt you. Any object in the room is a potential weapon against you.
Their Mystery: How do you stop a ghost?
Their Fear Provoking Appearance: He wears a Miner’s hard hat with a light on top, obscuring anything except his outline behind the light, but if you get close enough, he appears as a transparent, rotting corpse.
Their Rules: As a ghost, they can manifest in front of you and follow anywhere. Only ghost protection crystals, spells, prayers or amulets can keep it away.
Their Mythology: In the late 1800’s the Gold Miner and his family were attacked and killed by thieves trying to steal his gold mine claim. His anger and need for revenge caused his spirit to wander the earth.
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Curse of the Forty-Niner – Horror Conventions
What I learned doing this assignment is a concept can sound similar but be wildly different based on tone.
Title / Concept: Curse of the Forty-Niner
Terrorize The Characters: Chase with pick axe and shovel.
Isolation: Ghost Town and woods.
Death: Bloody kills. Explosions. Set on fire.
Monster/Villain: Zombie Gold Miner.
High Tension: Chase down people.
Departure from Reality: Zombie Miner back from dead.
Moral Statement: Don’t steal.
A few jump scares, but was terrible in almost every way. It was the closest to my idea I could find, though.
My concept:
Concept: Ghost of a gold miner terrorizes campers.
Terrorize The Characters: Haunts, chases them down and kills with mining equipment or his Hell Hound dog. Fall off cliffs, get trapped under cave-in.
Isolation: Woods near abandoned mine and inside old mine.
Death: Claustrophobia inside mine, a ghost that can’t be killed, no escape.
Monster/Villain: Ghost of gold miner and his Hell Hound.
High Tension: Ghost story comes to life. City people lost in woods and old mine, have no outdoor skills. Don’t know how to escape the paranormal entity.
Departure from Reality: Abandoned gold mine labyrinth haunted by ghost.
Moral Statement: Don’t mess with things you don’t understand. Let sleeping dogs lie.
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Julian Brantley
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Hi, I’m Julian Brantley from L.A. I’ve written over 10 scripts in different genres, mostly with writing partners. I’m hoping to get a deeper knowledge of what Producers are looking for in Horror material, and how I can elevate my current Horror scripts and those I write in the future.
I am an editor, working in Marketing, Short Films and last year I cut my first Feature Film.