[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Dialogue 1 + 2.

Someone knocks on the door. Detective Bernard opens it. MATT HOUSEMAN (38) barges in and confronts the detective.

MATT

From here on out, Mrs. Nicholson is my client. She’s not to speak to you until she speaks with me first.

NATALIE

Matt! What are you doing here?

MATT

Eric sent me.

NATALIE

Oh my God, is he okay? Have you seen him?

MATT

No, he told me to get my ass over here.

Matt glares at the detective.

MATT

Do we have any specific evidence I should know about?

Bernard shakes his head.

MATT

Any warrants, any confessions?

DETECTIVE BERNARD

No. And she passed the lie detector test.

Matt groans.

MATT

Natalie, you let them give you a lie detector test before discussing it with me?

NATALIE

I have nothing to hide, Matt. I didn’t do this. I’d never hurt Eric. And I had no idea you’d be here.

MATT

I texted you.

NATALIE

They took my phone.

Matt glares at Bernard.

MATT

We’ll need that back, Detective.

NATALIE

And my purse.

MATT

And her purse. Jeez, why didn’t you just get her an orange jumpsuit and call it a day?

DETECTIVE BERNARD

It was a voluntary interrogation.

MATT

That’s an oxymoron if I ever heard one.

DETECTIVE BERNARD

(to Natalie)

You’re free to go. They’ll have your purse and phone up front for you.

EDITED VERSION:

Someone knocks on the door. Detective Bernard opens it. MATT HOUSEMAN (38) barges in and confronts the detective.

MATT

From here on out, Mrs. Nicholson is my client. She’s not to speak to you until she speaks with me first.

NATALIE

Matt?

MATT

I’m only here because Eric begged me. Don’t think for one second I’m on your side.

NATALIE

Oh my God, is he okay? Have you seen him?

MATT

No, but he called me and told me to get my ass over here.

Matt glares at the detective.

MATT

Do we have any specific evidence I should know about?

Bernard shakes his head.

DETECTIVE BERNARD

What do you mean you’re not on her side?

MATT

That has nothing to do with any of this. We just don’t have the warm and fuzzies for each other. Capiche? So, Detective, any warrants, any confessions?

DETECTIVE BERNARD

Not directly.

NATALIE

No. And I passed the lie detector test.

Matt groans.

MATT

You let them give you a lie detector test before discussing it with me?

NATALIE

How was I supposed to know you’d show up?

MATT

I’m a criminal lawyer, Nat. Who did you think Eric would call? A plumber?

He looks her up and down.

MATT

Then again, wouldn’t be a bad idea. You have a leaky faucet for a mouth. How much have you said to these twerps?

NATALIE

I’ve got nothing to hide. You know I’d never hurt Eric.

MATT

(to Bernard)

We’re done here.

DETECTIVE BERNARD

Of course. Mrs. Nicholson, you’re free to go.

MATT

Doesn’t seem that way, since you have her in an interrogation room like a common criminal.

Matt leads her to the door.

MATT

You can text Eric and let him know I did my good deed for the year.

NATALIE

They took my phone.

Matt glares at Bernard.

MATT

We’ll need that back, Detective.

NATALIE

And my purse.

MATT

And her purse. Jeez, why didn’t you just get her an orange jumpsuit and call it a day?

DETECTIVE BERNARD

It was a voluntary interrogation.

MATT

That’s an oxymoron if I ever heard one.

DETECTIVE BERNARD

(to Natalie)

They’ll have your purse and phone up front for you.

She gives him an icy glare as she slips past him and out the door.

I do feel I could use more texture in my lead character of Natalie. I want her to be tough, but scared. And I think I’d like to give her a stronger need. I mean, she needs to be exonerated from this crime she’s accused of masterminding, but I think she needs Matt to believe her, and right now, he hates her. He’s okay thinking she’s part of the problem. Because something in their past has brought them to this point. And the mystery SHOULD be why he hates her so much. And it’s very complex. But I need to know how she feels about that. She doesn’t need to be liked. That’s not in her character. But she needs to be understood. Respected. That all is. And I want to be sure that is evident throughout the pilot.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim completed the P/S Grid #2

This was pretty tough for me. Mostly because since I worked so hard on the outline, I felt I didn’t have that many of these issues in my script. And therein lies my issue, haha. So, to be honest, I think I would need to put this away and take it out again to look at with a much more discerning eye.

But I did look at the scenes again and tried to find places to make the characters more “alive.” So, in general, I DID try to give them more depth and find places to challenge them more. I just think I would find more areas if I didn’t look at it for awhile. Or maybe I need a second set of eyes to tell me where I could make improvements.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Completed P/S Grid #1

What I learned from this assignment is that I struggle with breaking down my problems into these bite-sized pieces. I did find places to improve my draft, but would that have come even without using the grid? Not sure.

So, ultimately I knew I wanted to improve the beginning. It’s such a crucial bit because it needs to create a motive for my character as well as open up the mid-point to many possibilities, all based on my male protagonist’s huge character flaw of being a flirt and, possibly, a cheater.

I also wanted to create a stronger mystery surrounding my female protagonist. So I added an extra detail that runs throughout the episode and will continue through all the rest of the episodes, which will eventually tie everything together. This will also produce a bigger set-up for later episodes.

I also looked at my future episodes and seasons and decided I wanted to peripherally introduce characters that will be essential to my storyline. So, I added places where they could be organically mentioned.

I also added another one of my characters to the pilot, even though I initially didn’t plan to have him until further on. And gave it a little extra boost of conflict that way.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim has finished Acts 4 and 5.

What I learned from this assignment is…I had trouble completing it all in one fell swoop. Part of that is life with a job and kids. But also, my motivation wanes occasionally. It’s so easy to fall into the “Am I wasting my time writing this? Will it really go anywhere eventually?” mood. But I also know if I want something bad enough, I have to try for it. So, I finished the last two pages of the draft today. Good or bad, it’s done.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim finished Act 3

What I learned from this assignment is that if I was able to make a habit of this, I could write out several scripts a year.

Rule 1: A

Rule 2: A

Rule 3: A

Rule 4: A

Rule 5: A

Rule 6: A

I didn’t do a quick edit, I prefer to do that when I go through the edits on all of this.

[Kimberly Gore]

<div>Kim finished Act Two</div>

What I learned from this assignment is that it’s really hard for me to not go back and make hard edits right away. I feel like I need to sit on my hands!!! Haha.

The Speed Writing is great, I do it when I write novels because sometimes I get on a crazy roll. The difference here is that I used an outline, which has always been my nemesis. It actually felt much easier because I’d already spent so much time seeing the scene in my head.

Rule 1: B…but I was really going too fast to do much cheering, haha.

Rule 2: A…this is easy for me, since I have written novels and other screenplays!

Rule 3: A…and I think it is obvious, haha. Definitely a lot to “clean up.”

Rule 4: A…is there really any other way to do it???

Rule 5: B…a few times I stopped to consider a few minor changes, but I think they worked.

Rule 6: B…I’m actually really good at this, too. In the past I have used “placeholders” so that I could come back to things when I had better insight into what I wanted to do with the scene, but in this case, I didn’t feel the need. I think it’s because of the succinct outline.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim Finished Act 1 First Draft

What I learned from this assignment was to keep going, even knowing I might be making changes to make the personalities come out stronger.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Teaser/High Speed Writing

First of all, I agree with Mary J. It’s easier to write action than it is to “tell” what is happening. But also, I’m used to this technique of speed writing, and I am going to “cheat” a little and play catch-up on things…therefore I will be speed writing as much of the script as I can.

I’m excited to see the process of rewriting/editing our drafts.

My “teaser” ran five pages.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Outline with Intrigue

What I learned from this assignment is that I find another place to make an additional mystery and setup for intrigue.

ACT ONE

Empathy/Distress: New to class, but knows Eric and his history. Brings up his flirty ways.

Irony: The reason why Natalie is with Eric is because of his flirty, charming personality.

Setup: Preparation for understanding a) his flirting with another woman is part of who he is and b) Natalie’s anger and distress over it.

Intriguing World: Where a woman marries a philandering man but tries to find a way to accept and trust him.

Secret: Missy knows a lot about Eric and his past, could she have had (or is having) a relationship with him? Why does she bring this up to Natalie?

Deception: Is Missy trying to humiliate Nat?

Secret Identity: This touches on Linda (1955 soul) and Harriet (1905 soul)

Wound: Her past lives have all been wounded in some way by Eric

Hidden Layer: Eric’s unfaithfulness that Nat knows is there on some level

Imminent Threat: Missy and her calling Eric out.

Suspicion: Eric’s possible affair with Missy…or anyone.

Mystery: Why does Natalie “drown” the Barbie?

Empathy/Distress: Eric’s concern that his ex-wife will find Natalie’s actions odd.

Setup: Danielle’s curiosity and concern grows, especially knowing Natalie has psychological issues, even though she doesn’t know what, exactly, they are.

ACT TWO

Open Loop: We now know Nat used to be Eric’s patient, but how did she become his wife?

Mystery: Is Eric seeing someone else, or is Natalie just suspicious because of the red flag Missy produced?

Empathy/Distress: The argument Natalie and Eric have, and she brings up Missy and the conversation.

Setup: She wants Eric to console her, but he is defensive instead.

Mystery: Who attacked Eric?

Empathy/Distress: Natalie is upset that Eric is hurt, and Eric is in a lot of pain and losing blood.

Payoff: We know someone does not like Eric, or is unhappy with his behavior.

Irony: It should be Natalie, since she was upset when she left the house, but…

Setup: She appears to be terribly upset and panicked about what has happened to him.

Intriguing World: Jealousy

Mystery: What has happened? Who has done it?

Secret: Natalie’s past lives, particularly Linda, have taken over.

Secret Identity: Natalie’s past lives

Wound: In a past life, Eric as Donald cheated on her with another woman.

Hidden Agenda: Revenge

Suspicion: As it stands, a lot of possibilities…Danielle could have attacked him, Missy…any number of women he has flirted with. Or…Natalie is a really good actress and she did it.

ACT THREE

Mystery: She passed the test, why does he still suspect her?

Empathy/Distress: Nat wants to see her husband, but they are busy interrogating her

Setup: t can’t possibly be Natalie, so who was it?

Mystery: Still, who did this to Eric?

Secret: The detective knows she had something to do with the attack

Secret Identity: The souls within her are protecting her.

Strange Behavior: She seems to go from one type of personality to the next

Suspicion: Something doesn’t add up.

ACT FOUR

Empathy/Distress: Natalie and her mother-in-law are at odds with one another.

Irony: Eric is a momma’s boy, perhaps?

Setup: Maybe Eric is more loyal to his mother than his wife. What might this mean?

Intriguing World: Extramarital flings.

Mystery: Eric was definitely flirting with someone while on the phone. But with who?

Secret Identity: Eric and Natalie both change their personalities. His is less dramatic.

Wound: The emotional injuries sustained through past conflicts with one another.

Strange Behavior: Eric had to have seen the attacker, why does he claim he doesn’t know who it was?

Imminent Threat: Is Eric seeing another woman?

Suspicion: Did this other woman get angry and jealous and go after Eric?

ACT FIVE

Mystery: Who called Eric? Why did that person hang up?

Empathy/Distress: It’s been a tough day.

Irony: She revisits the drowned Barbie.

Setup: We know that everything that’s happening has to do with her weird fascination with that doll and drowning it.

Intriguing World: The mother and her son

Mystery: What does Eric’s mother know? What is she trying to do?

Secret: Someone is calling Eric, and he is hiding that person from Natalie.

Wound: Natalie can’t seem to find peace.

Hidden Layer: Eric’s mother is the protector

Strange Behavior: Natalie knows her reactions aren’t normal. But Eric’s aren’t, either, does no one see that?

Imminent Threat: Natalie should feel threatened by the detective and Eric’s mother. They both seem to have it out for her.

[Kimberly Gore]

<div>Kim’s Scene Requirements</div>

What I learned from doing this assignment was discovering places where I could add more tension and conflict in the scene. This is my first pass. I may update with my edited second pass.

ACT ONE

<div>

INT. NATALIE’S YOGA STUDIO—midday

• Start: Natalie instructs a yoga class. Most people know her.

• Challenging Situation: Woman coming for first time knows Natalie’s handsome husband. This makes Natalie uncomfortable.

• Conflict: Woman makes naïve remark that irks Nat.

• Action: Nat tells the woman off.

• Finish: Nat’s friend, LaDonna, has to soothe Natalie.

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S LIVINGROOM—Evening

• Start: Natalie plays Barbies with Eric’s daughter, and it’s creepy.

• Challenging Situation: Eric is upset Natalie is acting like a child when his ex-wife is about to pick up Linnie.

• Conflict: Eric and Natalie argue about her behavior, and he sends her off as if she’s a child being punished.

• Action: She leaves, but Eric’s ex has already seen the odd behavior.

• Finish: Natalie comes back into the room acting as if nothing has happened.

ACT TWO

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S LIVINGROOM—Evening

• Start: After Linnie and Danielle leave, Eric accosts Nat about taking her medicine.

• Challenging Situation: She feels she doesn’t need the medicine. It makes her feel “foggy.”

• Conflict: He explains what just happened, and how Danielle already is concerned since he is married to “his patient.” Natalie feels slighted, is angry that he is making her seem like a charity case.

• Action: He tries to explain himself, but she’s pissed.

• Finish: She leaves for the grocery store.

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S KITCHEN—Continuous

• Start: Eric flirting with someone on the phone.

• Challenging Situation: He thinks his wife has left, but she went back in to grab her car keys.

• Conflict: She hears him flirting, and her personality, the one from 1955, Linda, grows angry and attacks him.

• Action: She harms him, but frightened by her violence, runs off and leaves the house.

• Finish: Natalie doesn’t realize what’s happened, doesn’t remember the attack, since it was not her, but Linda. She honestly does not think she was the attacker.

ACT THREE

EXT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S HOUSE—Continuous

• Start: The detective is suspicious of Natalie, seems like an open and shut case.

• Challenging Situation: Natalie wants to see her husband.

• Conflict: The police won’t let her go to the hospital, and even though Natalie is in her right to refuse, the detective intimidates her. She knows she is innocent.

• Action: She leaves, humiliated at the audience judging her. Especially that woman who earlier made a big deal about Eric’s flirtatious ways.

• Finish: She makes an announcement to the group, determined not to appear guilty or look foolish.

INT. POLICE STATION’S INTERROGATION ROOM—Continuous

• Start: The detective is sure Natalie is going to fail the polygraph test.

• Challenging Situation: She passes the test.

• Conflict: He has no real evidence against her, and she threatens to sue him if he keeps her against her will. Suddenly, she’s furious, lashing out at him.

• Action: They let her go, but he finds her behavior odd.

• Finish: She leaves, and her personality changes. She’s back to being dignified.

ACT FOUR

INT. ERIC’S HOSPITAL ROOM—Continuous

• Start: Aggie shows up, ready to take charge, as usual.

• Challenging Situation: The detective isn’t done interrogating Eric. And now Eric is emotional.

• Conflict: The detective is upset that Eric’s mother has ruined his interview. Eric’s mother thinks the detective needs a life. In fact, she knows plenty about his life.

• Action: Eric tells his mother he will be okay.

• Finish: The detective doesn’t get any more information out of Eric.

INT. ERIC’S HOSPITAL ROOM—Continuous

• Start: Eric’s mother makes a sneaky phone call. Natalie shows up, and it’s clear they are not close with one another.

• Challenging Situation: The detective is disturbed once again, this time by Natalie.

• Conflict: Eric stands up for his wife.

• Action: The detective leaves, unsure of what to think.

• Finish: Natalie asks Eric who did this to him. He stares at her, then says he honestly doesn’t know.

ACT FIVE

INT. BATHROOM—Later

• Start: Nat finds Eric’s phone with an unfamiliar number.

• Challenging Situation: While in the bathtub, she becomes the little girl again and plays with the Barbie. But then she reenacts a scene, and it wakes her from her personality.

• Conflict: It upsets her, but even worse, she is even more upset when she reads the accusatory message.

• Action: She erases the message.

• Finish: She’s terrified.

</div>

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Beat Sheet

What I learned from doing this is how to further plot out my pilot.

SHOW CONCEPT – Past life personalities interfere with a couple’s relationship, hinting they need to change the trajectory of their lives.

INCITING INCIDENT – Natalie seemingly attacks her husband Eric in a fit of rage, only it turns out to be one of her personalities.

ABC Stories

A. Nat’s Multiple Personality Disorder is actually a reincarnated soul. She struggles to understand this while Eric ignores and squelches it. Even though one of her personalities wants to harm him.

B. Eric will do anything to prevent his wife from being the main suspect in the case to harm him. Even lie.

C. The police plan to find enough evidence to charge Natalie with the crime.

ACT ONE

INT. NATALIE’S YOGA STUDIO—midday

Natalie finishes up instructing a yoga class, and a young woman stops to chat. At first, she is very complimentary, but then she brings up Eric’s flirty behavior and Natalie becomes curt. Her friend, LaDonna, soothes things over, but it’s obvious the woman has pushed on a tender bruise.

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S LIVINGROOM—Evening

Natalie and Linnie are playing together. Eric watches on, irritated.

EXT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S HOUSE—continuous

Danielle walks up the sidewalk and is about to ring the doorbell, but hears yelling inside. She peers through the side pane.

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S LIVINGROOM—Evening

Natalie stalks off like a huffy little kid, and Linnie defends Nat to her father. The doorbell rings, and he lets Danielle in. Danielle doesn’t disguise the fact she’s watched the ordeal, and Eric is about to defend Natalie when Natalie walks in as if nothing has happened.

ACT TWO

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S LIVINGROOM—Evening

Eric discusses Natalie’s medication and that she needs to keep taking it, even as Natalie disagrees. She sets off to go grocery shopping.

INT. ERIC’S HOME OFFICE—Evening

Eric sits at his desk, looking out his window, flirting with someone on the phone. He hears a noise behind him and turns around. A knife plunges into his shoulder and he drops his phone. It skitters beneath the bed. He screams, but the knife strikes him again, this time in the leg.

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S KITCHEN—Later

Natalie drops her purse and two bags of groceries on the kitchen counter. She calls to Eric, asking him to help her put away the groceries. No answer. She walks towards the hallway.

INT. HALLWAY—Continuous

It’s eerily quiet. She walks further in, shouts to Eric. No reply. Peers in the bathroom. Empty. Walks further to his office. The door is shut. She calls his name again and hears a groan. Fearful, she swings open the door and finds him in a bloody mess on the floor.

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S KITCHEN—Continuous

She runs to her purse on the counter, rifles through it, and calls 911. She sees a bloody knife in the sink and picks it up, drops it back down in horror. She explains everything to the 911 operator, who tells her not to touch anything. She admits she touched the knife.

ACT THREE

EXT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S HOUSE—Evening

Detective Bernard inspects the exterior of the house and discusses with a policeman how there is no evidence of a break-in.

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S KITCHEN—Continuous

Natalie is clearly upset. She watches a policewoman bag the bloody knife. Says she needs to go meet her husband at the hospital, but the policewoman tells her she is being taken to the police station.

EXT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S HOUSE—Continuous

Neighbors stand outside, watching and whispering. Natalie is humiliated. Her friend LaDonna is there, also watching. So is the young woman who spoke to her about Eric’s flirtatious nature at the yoga studio. But Natalie holds her head up high. Announces to the group that she will find out who did this to her husband. And stares at the young woman until the woman looks away.

INT. POLICE STATION—Later

Detective Bernard receives the polygraph results and stares at them. He asks the person who has given the test if this is accurate. The man lets him know there can be errors, but this was pretty clear.

INT. POLICE STATION’S INTEROGATION ROOM—Continuous

The detective enters the room and quizzes Natalie, but Natalie won’t answer his questions. She wants to see her husband. She’s worried about him. The police took her phone, she hasn’t been able to get in touch with him to see if he is okay. Detective Bernard continues to press her for answers to his questions. She demands to know the outcome of the lie detector test, and he admits she passed with flying colors. She asks if he has any other evidence, and he admits not right now. She tells him then he can’t hold her anymore. She’s done. He is forced to let her go.

ACT FOUR

EXT. HOSPITAL—Evening

A woman marches towards the hospital, her pocketbook tucked under her arm. People move out of her way, she is clearly upset.

INT. ERIC’S HOSPITAL ROOM—Continuous

A policeman asks Eric questions, but Eric is evasive. His arm is bandaged, his legs beneath the covers. He’s tired and on painkillers. The woman from outside the hospital strides into the room, hands her purse to the policeman, and throws her arms around Eric. He sobs into her arms, suddenly acting like a young boy, and calls her momma.

A nurse enters and adjusts the medication going into his arm through an IV. She addresses Eric’s mother and they clearly know one another.

Detective Bernard enters, and asks for everyone else to clear out. But Eric’s mother refuses. The detective and Eric’s mom argue until Eric tells his mother it’s okay, she can go. After she leaves, the detective asks if he saw who attacked him, and he says no.

EXT. ERIC’S HOSPITAL ROOM—Continuous

Eric’s mom makes a phone call and explains what happened to Eric and wants to know if she has any idea who would have done this to Eric. She then admits to the caller that she thinks Natalie did this. But Eric always protects Natalie.

Natalie shows up, and Eric’s mom acknowledges her coldly. Natalie ignores her and enters Eric’s hospital room, despite her protests.

INT. ERIC’S HOSPITAL ROOM—Continuous

Detective Bernard and Eric both look up, startled. Natalie runs to Eric, hugs him, cries. Eric is now angry with the detective, yelling at him about accusing his wife, who clearly loves him. The detective leaves. Natalie asks if Eric saw who did this to him. He says no. And then checks to make sure she is okay. It’s clear their love is genuine.

ACT FIVE

INT. ERIC AND NATALIE’S KITCHEN

Natalie, exhausted and hungry, enters the kitchen, tossing down her purse. She starts stuffing food down her throat when she hears a phone ring.

INT. HALLWAY—Continuous

She runs down the hallway, listening. Finally, she reaches Eric’s office.

INT. ERIC’S HOME OFFICE—Continuous

She finds his phone beneath his desk. The phone number is unfamiliar. She answers, and the person hangs up.

INT. BATHROOM—Later

Natalie takes a bath with the doll in her hands. “Drown” the doll, then realizes what she is doing. Horrified, she throws it from the tub. She gets out of the bathtub and walks to the mirror. In the condensation is the sentence: You did this to him. She wipes it away.

EXT. ERIC’S HOSPITAL ROOM—Later

Eric’s mom kisses him goodnight. On the way out, she stops the nurse she knows and tells her to give Eric whatever it is he wants or needs. The nurse nods and slips into Eric’s hospital room. Eric’s mother tucks her purse under her arm and strides away, smiling.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Setting Up the Future

What I learned from doing this assignment is…that I’ve already come up with many of these, but I did add the part about Linnie’s phone. It does feel that with every exercise, I come up with at least one more additional incident.

List of events/character reveals/under-the-surface info:

-Eric’s personality change (subtle, but there – sets up his DID)

-Nat’s more obvious personality changes (DID)

-Linnie on her phone, we learn she has “friends” around the country that she’s met through on-line gaming, and Natalie is intrigued by this (setting up for Linnie’s future meeting of the son Nat gave up for adoption at sixteen)

-Aggie’s mothering (sets up for her need to control Eric)

-Nat’s doll game (sets up how her first personality died)

-Danielle’s anger toward Nat (sets up how Natalie “stole” Eric from Danielle)

-Eric’s inability to stand up for himself with his mom or Danielle (sets up his lack of male ego)

-Eric’s mystery convo (sets up his already happening affair with Claudia)

-Aggie’s mystery convo (Also Claudia, the woman she found a year ago to help Eric cope with his multiple personalities)

-The mystery phone call on Eric’s phone (Claudia)

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Adding Empathy/Distress!

What I learned doing this assignment is that it’s HARD to find more places of empathy and distress. I want to balance it with humor and uplifting moments because I fear it will end up too dang depressing for viewers. The juxtaposition is going to be a struggle, I’m afraid.

Linnie watching Nat playing with a Barbie doll and creating harm. Linnie is shocked. Gets upset over the drowning. But we see how much she loves Nat. She asks softly, “Did this happen to you?” And Nat nods. Linnie hugs her, but then takes the doll and runs away, making things light again.

Danielle talks down to Natalie. Let’s her know how much she dislikes her. Linnie comes to Nat’s defense, and Danielle is forced to back down, although we see it bothers her that her daughter is so attached to Natalie. We see Danielle is hurt and misses the life she once had.

Eric struggles for normalcy in the household, although we can tell things are not normal. But we learn that Natalie was his patient once, and now see that maybe Natalie has issues. So why would Eric marry her? But we see his love for her. They have small inside jokes, he’s clearly smitten with her. She’s very caring with him AND Linnie. Love is there.

Natalie tries so hard not to play victim. She has overcome so much. But the child in her hurts so much. And is so angry with Eric.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Open Loops and Mysteries

What I learned from doing this assignment is how to discover fresh loops and mysteries within the pilot. I’m sure I can dive deeper, though.

Mystery: Who attacked Eric and why?

Sub-Mysteries:

Eric clearly saw who attacked him, why is he not saying anything?

Why does the detective seem so certain it was Natalie?

If it was Natalie, why does she seem seriously shocked to find Eric injured?

Is there something important going on with Natalie that isn’t evident yet?

Who would want to harm Eric?

Who was he talking to on the phone, and is this related to the attack?

Main Open Loop: What is going on in Eric and Natalie’s marriage?

Sub-Open Loops:

Is Eric unhappy in his marriage?

Is it related to her immaturity?

Why does Eric want to hide things about Natalie from Danielle?

What happened between Danielle and Eric that made them get divorced?

Why is Eric with Natalie, when he treats her like a child?

What is Aggie hiding? What does she know?

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Stacking Intrigue

What I learned from this assignment is: I found deeper levels to character motivation!

Act 1

Secret Identity: Natalie is in her past life an eight-year-old (Beth) that drowned beneath ice.

Strange Behavior: Why is Natalie acting like a child? Why does this upset Eric, her husband?

Wound: Beth cannot get past how she died, needs Natalie to see what happened to her.

Act 2

Intrigue: Natalie used to be Eric’s patient, while he was still married to Danielle.

Mystery: What happened to his marriage with Danielle? Why is he with his former patient instead?

Secret: Who is Eric flirting with on the phone?

Turning point: the attack on Eric

Act 3

Accusation: Detective Bernard suspects Natalie attacked Eric.

Wound: Nat never in a million years would harm Eric. She’s devoted to him. He saved her from an unpleasant life.

Hidden Layer: He is always saving her in all the past lives. This has been his downfall, because he takes pity on her and doesn’t really love her.

Hidden Layer: Since he has never been a “strong man,” Saving Nat makes him feel like the man he wants to be, except it always costs him his life. This is because it’s a “false self.”

Intrigue: The detective gets a phone call, and for some reason is forced to let Natalie go, though we don’t know why yet. (It’s another officer who spoke with Eric. Eric denied that it was Natalie.)

Turning point: Natalie is not held at the police station. No true evidence to prove she had anything to do with the attack.

Act 4

Intrigue: We meet Eric’s overbearing mother, Aggie (Agatha). She’s a little TOO invested in her son.

Mystery: She makes a phone call to someone, and we don’t know who it is, but it seems it could possibly be his ex-wife, and she has a good relationship with her.

Accusation: Detective Bernard speaks to Eric at the hospital, tries to trick Eric into admitting it was Natalie. It doesn’t work.

Strange Behavior: Eric appears too calm, too steady. Has a clip to his voice. He has become Donald, a politician from 1955.

Turning Point: After the detective leaves, Aggie enters. She tells him he is a good boy, and tries to pat his head, but he shoves her hand away. Asks her to leave. This clearly upsets her, but she does as he has asked.

Act 5

Mystery: Eric’s phone rings, and Nat finds it under the bed, where he lost it after being attacked. She sees an unfamiliar number. She answers it, but the person hangs up.

Wound: She takes a bath with the doll, and little Beth comes back. Drowns the doll. Beth is angry. She trusted Henry, and Henry killed her. And now Henry is back in their lives, and not punished for what he’s done. (We don’t know this yet.)

Mystery: At the hospital, Aggie wants to make sure Eric is comfortable. She talks to one of the younger, prettier nurses who slips surreptitiously into Eric’s room and shuts the door.

Turning Point: Aggie walks out of the hospital and at the same time, Natalie sees the message on the mirror.

• This reply was modified 3 years ago by  Kimberly Gore.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Layers and Reveals

What I learned from this assignment is where I might be able to add more layers to build more suspense into my pilot.

Act One

LAYER/REVEAL Who is this woman playing with this young girl? Why is she acting like a little kid?

We learn she is Eric’s wife and Linnie is his daughter from a previous marriage. But why is she acting like a kid and why is Eric so angry right now?

Act Two

LAYER/REVEAL Still confused about Natalie. But it’s revealed that this isn’t the first time Danielle has felt Natalie to be odd. We also learn that Eric is a psychiatrist and Natalie was once Eric’s patient. Though we don’t know the deal with how the divorce all played out and what part, if any, Natalie had to play in it.

We don’t know who Eric is with on the phone. But he’s being flirty. And then the knife comes in…we don’t know who or why…or understand what’s happening. When Natalie comes home, she’s horrified and so we don’t suspect her at all.

Act Three

LAYER/REVEAL Why are the police so sure she committed this crime? And is Natalie telling the truth? Or a really good liar?

Act Four

LAYER/REVEAL Who is Aggie calling? Why doesn’t she like Natalie? Why does she treat Eric like a little kid? Why is he letting her? He calls her mommy. When the detective talks to Eric, he’s completely different. Combative, almost. Denies having seen anything. His mother clearly doesn’t believe Eric. Is Eric protecting Natalie? Was she the one who went after him? But why? And why is he covering it up?

Act Five

LAYER/REVEAL She picks up the doll, the cup of ice water from the living room. Tidies the throw pillows on the couch. Puts the glass in the dishwasher and notices the knife missing from the sink. She walks upstairs and yanks off her clothes. Makes a bath. Stares at the doll. She slips into the bathtub with it. Becomes the little girl again. Takes the doll underneath the water, makes it squirm. We don’t understand what’s happening.

Then she seems to come out of it, stares at the doll, confused. Throws it from the tub. Starts to cry.

We think maybe the nurse going into Eric’s room is doing something sexual. What we don’t know is that she’s giving him medication to take home. Narcotics. That will be revealed in a further episode.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Character Story Lines

What I learned from this assignment is where I could increase for tension and more story subplots. It was actually a lot of fun, I added a new character and gave yet another character a cameo in the pilot, which I hadn’t intended to do.

NATALIE

• Beginning: Natalie is mesmerized by the cold ice.

• Turning Point: She’s behaving like a small child, and Eric is upset with her.

• Midpoint: She discovers Eric a bloodied mess in the home

• Turning Point 2: The police think she’s the attacker

• Major Conflict: She knows she didn’t do this, and yet she’s being blamed

• Ending: She finds a message written to herself on the mirror accusing her of attempted murder

ERIC

• Beginning: Eric finds his wife having a personality change episode

• Turning Point: He has to make it stop by sending her out of the room before his ex-wife sees the strange behavior

• Midpoint: He sees the person attack him with the knife, and is caught off guard

• Turning Point 2: He is taken to the hospital, asked if he saw who attacked him

• Major Conflict: He doesn’t want anyone to know his wife did this to him

• Ending: He tells them he didn’t see who it was. (Later, he will change his story and make someone up.)

LINNIE

• Beginning: Natalie makes her feel uncomfortable, talking about dying in cold water. She turns it into a game.

• Turning Point: She knows her mom is coming to pick her up, but she would rather stay and play with Natalie.

• Midpoint: Her father gets angry with Natalie, and Linnie tries to defend her, but Nat is still sent away.

• Turning Point 2: Her mother makes it obvious she thinks Natalie is too immature, too wild. Hints at Natalie’s poor background, but Linnie defends Nat.

• Major Conflict: Linnie thinks Natalie is a lot more fun than any other grown-up in her life.

• Ending: She leaves with her mother, but mentions something about Barbie needing to be rescued from the frigid water. Nat doesn’t seem to understand.

DANIELLE

• Beginning: Danielle rings the doorbell when she comes to pick up Linnie from Eric’s house. She hears laughter and commotion and peers through the glass.

• Turning Point: Eric is talking down to Natalie, which amuses Danielle.

• Midpoint: She mentions to Eric that she’s noticing Nat’s immature behavior, razzes him about “robbing the cradle.”

• Turning Point 2: Linnie defends Natalie, which pisses Danielle off. Linnie should have NO LOYALTY to Eric’s second wife.

• Major Conflict: She wants Eric to know she’s watching, paying attention, even as she’s trying to appear light and caring to Linnie.

• Ending: She leaves with a veiled threat to Eric about Natalie being likely to be committed someday.

DETECTIVE BERNARD

• Beginning: Inspects the house, there is no breaking or entering.

• Turning Point: Finds the knife used for the attack in the sink and bags it.

• Midpoint: Takes Nat in for questioning, though lets his fellow police peeps know he already suspects her and he’s never wrong.

• Turning Point 2: At the station, he’s surprised that she passes the polygraph with flying colors and she seems authentically bewildered about who could have harmed Eric.

• Major Conflict: It makes no sense, evidence seems to point to Nat, and yet, she is either the best actress in the world, or really does believe she is innocent.

• Ending: He lets her go.

AGGIE

• Beginning: Arrives at the hospital, crazy upset about her boy.

• Turning Point: Asks him point blank who could have done this to him, but is ushered out by hospital staff, as they are taking him to get stitches.

• Midpoint: Makes a phone call to someone, though we don’t know who it is, asks if that person might have an idea who could have done this.

• Turning Point 2: She tells the person on the phone she suspects it’s Natalie and could Nat know about this person’s relationship with Eric?

• Major Conflict: Aggie wants police to blame Natalie, but she needs to play it cool for her son, who she knows will refuse to point a finger at Natalie.

• Ending: She wants to make sure the nurses take good care of her son.

ACT ONE

Teaser: Natalie stares at ice cubes in a glass of water, shakes it. Tells Linnie, “A human will only last about ten minutes in freezing water.” She places a Barbie Doll into the water as Linnie watches.

Essence: Natalie is reliving her past life as a girl who drowned in freezing water, but does not know this right now.

(L TP) Natalie makes Linnie feel uncomfortable, talking about dying in cold water. She turns it into a game.

(E Beginning) Eric finds his wife having a personality change episode.

(D Beginning) Danielle rings the doorbell when she comes to pick up Linnie from Eric’s house. She hears laughter and commotion and peers through the glass.

(E TP) Reic has to make Natalie stop by sending her out of the room before his ex-wife sees the strange behavior

(D TP) Danielle enters, she heard him yelling at Natalie, saw the ruckus through the side pane windows, expresses annoyance at Nat’s childish behavior. But Natalie walks into the room as if nothing odd has happened.

(L MC) Major Conflict: Linnie thinks Natalie is a lot more fun than any other grown-up in her life.

ACT TWO

Essence: We learn Natalie is on medication, but she hasn’t taken it lately. This upsets Eric.

(E TP) We learn that not only is Natalie married to Eric, but she was, and still is, his psychiatric patient.

Essence: Eric is on the phone with someone, talking in a low voice, mentioning he only has a little bit of time, his wife is grocery shopping. There’s a sexually charged discussion, he’s obviously having an extramarital fling.

(E MP) He sees the person attack him with the knife, and is caught off guard

(N MP) Natalie discovers Eric a bloodied mess in the home and calls police.

ACT THREE

(B B) Detective Bernard inspects the house, there is no breaking or entering.

(B MP) Takes Nat in for questioning, though lets his fellow police peeps know he already suspects her and he’s never wrong.

(N MC) She knows she didn’t do this, and yet she’s being blamed.

(B TP) At the station, Detective Bernard is surprised when Nat passes the polygraph with flying colors and she seems authentically bewildered about who could have harmed Eric.

(B Ending) The detective lets Nat go.

ACT FOUR

(A Beginning) Eric’s mother Aggie arrives at the hospital, crazy upset about her boy.

(A MP) Makes a phone call to someone, though we don’t know who it is, though we think it’s Danielle, asks if that person might have an idea who could have done this.

(A MC) Aggie wants police to blame Natalie, but she needs to play it cool for her son, who she knows will refuse to point a finger at Natalie.

(E TP) Detective Bernard visits and asks if Eric saw who attacked him.

(E Ending) Eric tells them he didn’t see who it was. (Later, he will change his story and make someone up.)

ACT FIVE

Essence: After a grueling question and answer session and realizing the police took the knife she touched as evidence, Natalie comes home and hears Eric’s phone ringing. She finds it under the bed, but when she answers it, the person hangs up. The number is unfamiliar.

Lock In: She makes up a steamy, hot bath. Cries, pulls herself together. When she gets out of the tub, written in the condensation on the mirror is the sentence: “You did that to him.” Frightened, she rubs it out.

(A Ending) Aggie wants to make sure the nurses take good care of her son. She plants money into one nurse’s hand and says, “Anything he wants, you give him, understand?” The nurse nods slyly. She and Aggie seem to have an understanding. The nurse looks around to make sure no one notices, then she slips into Eric’s hospital room.

• This reply was modified 3 years ago by  Kimberly Gore.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Pilot Structure

What I learned from doing this assignment is that this feels like the most organic way to create a succession of events, piece by piece. And omg I can’t wait to start writing it!

1. Present the first draft of your pilot Acts.

Teaser: Natalie stares at ice cubes in a glass of water, shakes it. Tells Linnie, “A human will only last about ten minutes in freezing water.” She places a Barbie Doll into the water as Linnie watches.

• Essence: Natalie is reliving her past life as a girl who drowned in freezing water, but does not know this right now.

• Turning Point: Linnie is bothered and grabs the doll and runs off, Natalie chasing after her in an impromptu game of tag. They are laughing and acting like two kids, and Eric comes into the room, intervening, upset. Then Danielle, Linnie’s mom, rings the doorbell.

Act 1:

• Essence: Eric asks Natalie to go to another room, but she refuses, still in little kid mode. He turns on her, demands she leave, and she slinks off, pouting.

• Turning Point: Danielle enters, she heard him yelling at Natalie, saw the ruckus through the side pane windows, expresses annoyance at Nat’s childish behavior. But Natalie walks into the room as if nothing odd has happened.

Act 2:

• Essence: We learn Natalie is on medication, but she hasn’t taken it lately. This upsets Eric.

• Turning Point/Midpoint: We learn that not only is Natalie married to Eric, but she was, and still is, his psychiatric patient.

Act 3:

• Essence: Eric is on the phone with someone, talking in a low voice, mentioning he only has a little bit of time, his wife is grocery shopping. There’s a sexually charged discussion, he’s obviously having an extramarital fling.

• Turning Point: He hears a noise behind him, turns, and drops his phone as he’s attacked by a knife. The phone slides away, and he moans into the floor and passes out.

Act 4:

• Essence: Natalie returns home from grocery shopping. Finds a bloody knife in the sink. Picks it up and looks at it. Drops it and runs around the house searching for Eric. He finds him in the hall, where he’s crawled from the bedroom.

• Turning Point: She calls 911 and an ambulance and two police cars arrive, and she’s immediately questioned by police. They take her away for more questioning at the station.

Act 5:

• Essence: After a grueling question and answer session and realizing they took the knife she touched as evidence, she comes home and hears Eric’s phone ringing. She finds it under the bed, but when she answers it, the person hangs up. The number is unfamiliar.

• Lock In: She makes up a steamy, hot bath. Cries, pulls herself together. When she gets out of the tub, written in the condensation on the mirror is the sentence: “You did that to him.” Frightened, she rubs it out.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Amazing Inciting Incident

What I learned from this assignment is that I have a few levels happening…hiding the DID, and hiding that Natalie was the one to harm Eric.

Inciting Incident this pilot needs to deliver powerfully: That Natalie’s personalities are leading her to discover the pain in her past lives.

• Intriguing Concept: Eric and Natalie need to cover up her Dissociative Identity Disorder and subsequent attack on Eric while piecing together why her alternate personality tried to kill him.

• Act 1: Nat plays with Eric’s fourteen-year-old daughter, Linnie, on a Saturday afternoon. Kid-like, she amuses Linnie, but when Daniele is at the door to pick up Linnie, Eric is enraged that Natalie hasn’t switched gears in time for Danielle to question Nat’s behavior.

• Midpoint: Eric is viciously attacked by knife while flirting on the phone with someone. This is when we discover Natalie has multiple personality disorder and Eric is trying desperately to hide that fact.

• Lock In: Everything points to Natalie as the perpetrator…evidence leads to her. She denies it and Eric is on board, lying to the police about the attacker being a stranger. When Nat gets home from the police station, she reads a message on her mirror telling her she was the attacker.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Big Picture Components

What I learned from doing this assignment is that I’m wondering if my concept is strong enough, or if I need to rethink it.

SERIES INFO:

• World: The world of reincarnation

• Main mystery: Can their souls right the wrongs of the past?

• Impossible Goal: To prevent Natalie from be locked up in a psych ward, or else she and her possible soulmate, Eric, will never be able to go forward and make things right.

• Main Conflict: Eric wants to save Natalie, but so much is against her, including his own mother and Natalie’s therapist.

• Second Mystery: Why is Nat’s therapist so interested in her life, to the point of obsession?

• Season 1 Arc: Natalie discovers her multiple personalities stem from being reincarnated, and Eric admits he has a drinking problem. They need each other.

• Season 1 Protagonist Internal Journey: Natalie’s walls begin to break down. Eric stands up for his wife, something he can’t seem to do for himself.

PILOT INFO:

• Pilot Conflict: Natalie is accused of attempted murder on Eric, but she knows it wasn’t her, it was one of her personalities. Eric believes this as well and fights to protect his wife, who used to be under his psychiatric care and to an extent still is.

• Characters Introduced: Natalie, Eric, Danielle (Eric’s ex), Linnie (Eric and Danielle’s daughter)

• Inciting Incident of Season 1: Eric is stabbed by his wife, who was another personality at the time of the attack.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Visually Appealing Bible

What I learned from this assignment is that it’s okay to add visual elements to help your Pitch Bible stand out. In sending out materials for literary agents and book publishers, this is a huge no-no, so I was excited to see I could add artistic details to further strengthen my pitch materials. I don’t have the digital talent (or the money) to make it as amazing as the example, but I like the idea of creating more intrigue through the design.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Edited TV Pitch Bible

What I learned from the assignment is that I struggle with pinpointing the essential parts of each episode and want to squeeze in every detail, so this has been a lesson in frugality for me.

• This reply was modified 3 years ago by  Kimberly Gore.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Episode Titles

What I learned from doing this assignment, which I kinda already knew, is that I suck at coming up with great titles. 🙂

1.1 Harmful Intent

1.2 Her Most Sacred Secret

1.3 Speak No Evil

1.4 Trial and Error

1.5 Hear No Evil

1.6 Come to Her Defense

1.7 Soul to Soul

1.8 Off the Radar

1.9 See No Evil

1.10 New Threat

I am still working on these. I think better ones will pop in my head the more I tweak my episode synopses. Crossing fingers.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim presents non-stop intrigue.

What I learned from doing this assignment is that editing feels very natural to me.

As a published author, I’ve had a lot of practice in “tweaking,” so this wasn’t the most difficult part of the class for me. (Plotting definitely was my biggest challenge.) However, I never considered all the ways to rewrite a sentence, and that was some great information. It really boils things down for me. I do feel writing is very intuitive for me, but part of that is the time I’ve taken using courses like this one to aid me in becoming a stronger writer. One of the issues I KNOW I have is “overwriting.” So I spend a lot of time stripping unnecessary words from my work. I used to be married to particular paragraphs, avoiding the cutting and slashing that my novice writing self found so traumatic and formidable. I’ve become a little desensitized, out of necessity, so now it’s just a matter of recognizing the places I can delete.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Intriguing Patterns

What I learned from doing this assignment is that there are many ways to discover the “perfect” line.

My chosen sentence: Natalie Howard lives a life in a series of lives, each one suffering from mistakes of the past.

A. Establish something shocking and point to the terrible things it could mean.

A drowning, a fire, a fall: each of Natalie’s past lives ended tragically.

B. Strong statement; question about something underhanded beneath the surface.

Natalie Howard’s secrets are getting more and more difficult to hide from the world.

C. Question that points to hidden agendas, hidden identity, conspiracy, etc..

How can Natalie Howard understand what her past lives are telling her when she’s busy focusing on avoiding jail time?

D. Character 1 is convinced/worried/wondering that Character 2 has done _____________.

Natalie wonders what Eric has done to make one of her other personalities attack him.

E. But maybe it is all wrong.

Natalie has been diagnosed with Multiple Personality Disorder, but it’s evident something else is going on.

F. A Pattern that Leads to Future Consequences

Natalie finds notes all over her home, notes she’s written to herself. Notes that remind her that her personalities are reaching out to tell her something important.

G. If he does ________________, that means ___Intrigue_____.

H. Just because the police think Natalie tried to murder her husband doesn’t mean she wants him dead, right?

I. State the mystery.

What are Natalie’s personalities trying to tell her? And who’s going to believe that she didn’t try to kill her husband?

J. Should be/could be _______, but it is even worse.

Natalie should be content with her life: a marriage to a charming psychiatrist, her own yoga practice, and living in an affluent community. Except her life is one gigantic sham.

K. Intense language.

Natalie grew up blaming her dysfunctional family for her Dissociative Identity Disorder. But now she knows her soul has been sending her warnings.

[Kimberly Gore]

What I learned from doing this assignment is how to dig dipper into motivation and the past and find places where I need to know where everything starts, even if it never shows up in the actual episodes. Although I think I will use all these, even if they aren’t obvious or need to be used further down the line to explain something later.

Tool 1: Dig: What’s beneath that? LaDonna’s murder. We think Claudia did it, even though they’re friends. BUT Eric’s mother does it. After LaDonna leaves Claudia’s, she begins to walk home but remembers she left her phone. It starts to rain. Hard. Claudia has called Eric’s mom to let her know LaDonna knows everything. Eric’s mom sees LaDonna returning to Claudia’s, and offers her a ride. Grateful, LaDonna accepts. But Eric’s mom veers off the wrong way, feigning poor eyesight and making a wrong turn. She stops at the end of a road under construction, and point-blank asks LaDonna what she knows about her son. LaDonna isn’t alarmed at first. She calmly explains what she knows. Eric’s mom leaves the car, visibly upset, pretending not to know about the DID, which surprises LaDonna. Eric’s mom drops to the ground, pretending to cry, but grips a chunk of concrete in her hand. When LaDonna comes up behind her to try to console her, the rain pouring so hard, she’s drenched, Eric’s mom comes up fast and smashes her in the head with the rock. She attacks LaDonna brutally, until LaDonna no longer breathes. Then, she dumps her body in the ditch by the road and jumps back into her car. Drives away. USE IN LATER EPISODE AS EXPLANATION.

Tool 2: Extrapolate: Matt doesn’t want to represent Nat because he’s bitter that she replaced his sister. But then he begins to learn more about Natalie. Her sister writes letters to Matt, threatening to expose Natalie’s terrible upbringing during the trial. Matt actually becomes sympathetic to Nat and sees her more as a victim than the instigator. But Nat doesn’t want him feeling sorry for her. She gets angry with him. He keeps trying to tell her he’s helping her, but she feels he’s trying to find out what he can use against her. And then his sister, Danielle, is angry because he’s finding pity for the woman who took her place. The goal has been to defend Natalie. But now, it feels impossible. She’s attacked Eric, this is true, but her DID is her defense. But Danielle thinks she’s using it as a “get out of jail free” card. The divorce has made it hard on Danielle, who was a stay-at-home mother and now has to work as a bank teller to keep the house they live in. She’s bitter. And now that Matt is starting to take Natalie’s side? Put that bitch away. USE IN EPISODE.

Tool 3: Wonder: What if Jeanine has HIV? At first, Natalie thinks it’s another ploy. But she talks to Jeanine’s doctor, and it’s so. She feels guilty. She has the good life while Jeanine suffers. It’s not fair. GUILT until Jeanine begins to blackmail Nat for more money. And Eric finds out she’s handing her sister money. Cuts her off. And Jeanine gets meaner. Shows up at Nat’s yoga class. At one of the garden parties the high-brow neighbor throws. Anywhere she can stick in a barb to hurt Natalie. She left the family, turned on them to live a life free from the streets. So unfair. The least Nat can do is financially support her. USE IN EPISODE.

Tool 4: Backtrack: How could Eric’s cheating have happened? When Eric and his mother took Linnie out shopping for school clothes, his eyes locked with Claudia’s in the store. It was as if he knew her. She smiled, his heart lurched. But they did not speak to one another. She did overhear him say Linnie’s name. Then she found out who he was by asking around. She did some sleuthing on the internet. And made sure to bump into his mother later on, at the bridal shop Eric’s mother owned. She pretended she was getting married, was looking for a gown. Made Eric’s mom feel sorry for her, she was marrying a guy her parents hated. Eric’s mom confides she hates Eric’s wife. They decide to go for coffee the next day. The next day arrives and Eric’s mom learns Claudia is a past-life regression specialist. Eric’s mom has been keeping this burdensome secret about her son forever. She discloses it, and Claudia is now positive Eric is attached to her past lives. Especially when Eric’s mom talks about the different people Eric has inside him. They are all so familiar to Claudia. She offers to see Eric, free of charge, for an evaluation. As a favor to Eric’s mom.

Claudia attempts to seduce Eric, and he finds her alluring. They begin a secret relationship. This is the person Eric speaks with while on the phone when Natalie attacks him.

But when Natalie invites him to meet Claudia, they pretend not to know one another. And Eric goes as far as to pretend not to like Claudia. He definitely doesn’t want to be in the same room with Claudia and Natalie. So it’s believable that he distrusts Claudia, and Nat is disappointed. Even angry. USE IN EPISODE.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Show Summary

What I learned from this assignment is ways I can follow one clear path to a summary when so many subplots want to take center stage.

One Hour Suspense Drama

Pretending to be an affluent, sophisticated, well-adjusted member of society is a challenging aspect of Natalie Howard’s life. Raised, if you can even call it that, by a mother chained to prostitution and a father imprisoned for selling fentanyl-laced heroin, she’s had to wear metaphorical armor all her life. At age twenty, she was diagnosed with Dissociative identity Disorder. In layman’s terms, Multiple Personality Syndrome. It was her psychiatrist, Eric Howard, that came to the rescue, marrying her and changing her life. She went from dumpster-diving for scraps to lobster and steak meals at the elite Aloha restaurant. There’s still a lot he doesn’t know about her, and she has no intention of telling him. Her past needs to remain in the dark.

But he has his secrets, too. Because he, also, suffers from Dissociative Identity Disorder. His doting mother is the only one who knows, and she’ll do anything to protect him. Anything. And since Eric has no sense of self, despite helping people become mentally stronger, his choices are poor, his judgment cloudy, and his need to escape reality with alcohol much too solid.

When one of Natalie’s personalities attacks Eric in a fit of jealous rage, their lives are upended. Eric’s daughter from his previous marriage is caught in the middle, a fourteen-year-old whose mother doesn’t trust Eric’s new wife not to harm others. But Natalie knows she would never harm Eric, and definitely not the daughter she loves like her own child. Something else is going on. But while Eric is busy pretending everything is fine, Natalie comes to terms with the fact that her multiple personalities are trying to tell her something. Through the help of her new-age friend LaDonna, it becomes evident Natalie’s soul is permanently linked to Eric’s. This isn’t a psychiatric disorder. It’s reincarnation. And the only way her soul can rest is for her to put right the mistakes her soul has made in the past.

Her past-life regression therapist, Claudia, is eager to help Natalie using hypnotism to retrieve past-life memories. Except she has an ulterior motive. She wants to separate Eric and Natalie. Her soul, too, is linked to this couple. She’s known it for years. How perfect that after all this time Natalie has sought her out. Although her Dissociative Identity Disorder has shown a different pathway, it’s still the same story, her personalities linked to Eric and Natalie’s. Her soul meant to co-mingle with Eric’s soul.

With Natalie’s attempted murder charge looming, Eric’s ex-wife’s attempts to obtain full custody of his daughter, a therapist with an agenda, and a multitude of personalities bobbing to the surface, Natalie must drop her armor, and Eric needs to grow a backbone. They can’t repeat the mistakes of their past. They need to make changes for tomorrow.

But then a fourth person arrives. And the secret Natalie has been hiding from Eric all along might be the one that prevents their souls from ever achieving that necessary peace.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Episodes Descriptions

What I learned from doing this assignment is how to organize each of my episodes in a way that explains the essential plot of each one.

Episode 1:

• Hook/Intrigue: A psychologist, ERIC, is on phone, flirting with someone. Someone comes up behind him, stabs him with a knife, it’s obvious he knows his attacker.

• Main Character journey: The man’s wife, NATALIE, finds him a bloodied mess and calls 911. We discover the wife suffers from Disassociate Identity Disorder, and the police are suspicious of her.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: Natalie knows she did not try to kill Eric.

• Action/Reaction: She freaks out, argues, her different personalities come out and it’s eerie to hear her play different parts.

• Cliffhanger: The police want to confiscate her phone, when she grabs it from her purse, a piece of paper falls out with it. She picks it up, reads it, gasps. The police are too busy noting the blood on her phone to notice. As they lead her away, the paper falls to the floor. It reads: “You are the sacrificial lamb.”

Episode 2:

• Hook/Intrigue: The police can’t hold her without proof of her guilt, and her husband claims she was not involved in the attack. Her friend, LADONNA, drives her home from the police station and Natalie is in a panic, wondering if she could have attacked Eric and just can’t remember doing it.

• Main Character journey: Natalie’s sister arrives, and Natalie mistakenly thinks it’s because she wants to check on her after what has happened, but instead, JEANINE asks her for money.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: Knowing the money will be used to fuel her sister’s drug habit, Natalie refuses. Jeanine threatens to tell Eric about the son Natalie gave up for adoption when she was sixteen. And about things that happened to them as kids.

• Action/Reaction: Natalie gives in and writes her sister a check.

• Cliffhanger: Eric writes a check at the hospital, and it bounces. He looks at the past activity and sees various amounts of money Natalie has taken out of their account at irregular intervals, although it is always the same amount.

Episode 3:

• Hook/Intrigue: Eric is finally feeling better and looking forward to his weekend with his daughter, but his ex-wife, DANIELLE, refuses to allow LINNIE to stay with Eric and Natalie.

• Main Character journey: Eric calls his mother to intervene. Eric has never been able to handle conflict or stress on his own.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: His mother tells Danielle she will stay there as a second set of hands while Eric recovers from his injuries, and she will keep an eye on Natalie as well. Although Danielle protests, his mother uses everything in her arsenal to fight back, and she wins.

• Action/Reaction: Natalie is upset that her mother-in-law, a woman who has openly said Natalie isn’t good enough for her son, is staying the entire weekend.

• Cliffhanger: A message appears on the bathroom mirror in lipstick: “Why are you so weak?” Eric removes it before anyone else can see it.

Episode 4:

• Hook/Intrigue: Eric asks his best friend, MATT, to sit with Natalie as her lawyer when she returns to the police station for more questioning. Matt doesn’t want anything to do with this case. Or Natalie. Eric gets up, walks away, takes off in his car.

• Main Character journey: Eric ends up at a bar flirting with women, getting into a fight with a bouncer, and finally passing out in an alley where he gets robbed.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: Natalie is worried sick when her husband doesn’t come home. She knows Matt was the last one to be with him, and together they go out and search for Eric.

• Action/Reaction: They find him and bring him home, but Eric has no memory of what happened. Natalie assumes he had a blackout, and Matt admits he’s known about Eric’s alcoholism. Matt agrees to represent Natalie after all.

• Cliffhanger: Eric finds a note with an odd, cryptic message. He takes it into the bedroom and opens a shoebox full of other messages, all written in different handwriting styles.

Episode 5:

• Hook/Intrigue: After teaching her yoga class, Natalie is approached by her friend and mentor, an older woman named LADONNA. She’s concerned because of the neighborhood gossip and how it might be affecting Natalie. The neighborhood knows Eric is a flirt, and have already speculated it’s a jealous wife situation.

• Main Character journey: Natalie has worked hard to prevent her poor upbringing from leaking out, but neighbors have been poking into her past and learned she isn’t the person she’s pretending to be. When Natalie is with Linnie, she often acts like a teenager herself, and Linnie is very close to her. Other times, she becomes a little lost kid, rocking and sucking her thumb.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: She knows she has Dissociative Identity Disorder and is being treated for it by Eric, but she keeps having blasts of weird memories and notes written to her. She brings this up to LaDonna, who thinks something more is going on. She wants Nat to see her friend, a past-life regression therapist named KRYSTAL. But Natalie doesn’t believe in reincarnation and says no way.

• Action/Reaction: LaDonna presses, but Natalie won’t comply.

• Cliffhanger: Linnie is at the house when Natalie returns, and a social worker is packing up Linnie’s things. Danielle has managed to get a court order to collect Linnie and give Danielle temporary full custody until Natalie’s court situation is settled. Natalie becomes her teen persona, and throws a tantrum. Eric has to calm her down.

Episode 6:

• Hook/Intrigue: Natalie returns from yoga class to find Eric passed out at the table, a bottle of bourbon in his hand. She goes to bed and the next morning wakes to find him gone. But he has left his phone. She grabs it and her purse and dashes to his office to give his phone to him. But he isn’t at work.

• Main Character journey: Nervous he’s out meeting someone, she drives all over the place. Finally, she heads to Matt’s office and demands to see him.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: Natalie wants to know if Eric is cheating on her. But Matt turns the table and tells her that she would deserve it, since the only reason Eric isn’t with his sister Danielle is because Eric broke up with her after being Natalie’s psychiatrist and cheating on his sister with her.

• Action/Reaction: During their subsequent argument, Natalie gets flashes of fire, something burning. A memory of pain, anger, hurt. She leaves the office, confused.

• Cliffhanger: She goes home and finds Eric packing his bags. His mother is beside him, prompting him to just go. After he is gone, she finds the shoebox of messages opened up on his bed. One of them reads: “Where did all your money go?”

Episode 7:

• Hook/Intrigue: Natalie visits her sister, who lives in a seedy part of town. Her sister’s boyfriend won’t let her into their apartment, but when she finally gets inside, she sees her sister, strung out with needles everywhere.

• Main Character journey: Her sister is going to end up just like their parents, but not Natalie. She rejects this lifestyle, leaves. Visits LaDonna. Talks about the fire, her sister, Eric…she needs to pull herself together. LaDonna takes her to Krystal.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: Krystal puts her into a hypnotic state, and Natalie remembers a fire from a past life, one which started in a barn. She couldn’t escape. She panics, and Krystal can’t control her.

• Action/Reaction: Natalie needs to get out! She pounds on the door, screams. Krystal can’t get her back out of the hypnotic state.

• Cliffhanger: Natalie crashes through the window while Krystal screams.

Episode 8:

• Hook/Intrigue: Natalie wakes up in the hospital with no idea how she got there. Eric is next to her, holding her bandaged hand.

• Main Character journey: He’s sorry he left her, blames himself for what happened. Says he doesn’t know how to handle things now that Linnie’s mother has temporary custody. But now he knows he needs to be by Nat’s side.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: Natalie tells him about the therapy, says she’s making breakthroughs. Tells him about the barn, the fire. He is angry, thinks the therapist is leading her on. Says he’s going with her to the next appointment.

• Action/Reaction: Natalie feels they are going somewhere good, now. He loves her. He’s going to take care of things finally.

• Cliffhanger: Eric meets Krystal, and there is an obvious attraction. Krystal gives him her number “in case something else happens with Natalie.” But she has an ulterior motive.

Episode 9:

• Hook/Intrigue: Danielle drops Linnie off for a supervised weekend with Eric, his mother, and Natalie. Eric is on the phone a lot. Natalie feels uncomfortable with it.

• Main Character journey: Natalie is becoming different personalities again, and Eric wants to stop it from happening during Linnie’s visit, so he gives Natalie a sedative. His mother refers to this being something he occasionally does. While she fixes him lunch, he is sexting with Krystal.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: All weekend, Natalie is groggy. She isn’t herself during yoga, and LaDonna notices. She confronts Natalie, asking if she’s doing drugs, and they argue.

• Action/Reaction: Natalie wonders if she might be taking drugs. Or if her personalities might be.

• Cliffhanger: Natalie wakes in the middle of the night. Eric has left his phone charging on the kitchen counter. She grabs a glass of water and his phone buzzes with a flirty text from Krystal. The glass slips from her hand.

Episode 10:

• Hook/Intrigue: Natalie confronts Eric about the text message the next morning. He honestly seems not to know what she’s talking about. She tells him to open his phone, and he does, but the text messages aren’t there.

• Main Character journey: Eric is tired of Natalie’s accusations when he hasn’t done anything.

• Major Challenge/Conflict: He leaves to take Linnie back to Danielle’s, and we learn that Eric’s mother has been monitoring his phone and “cleaning up” after him. When he returns home, his mother warns him that he’s being careless.

• Action/Reaction: Eric is angry, he’s finding he is losing control more and more. He begins to cry like a young child.

• Cliffhanger: His mother holds him, strokes his head as if he’s a little boy. She makes a phone call and tells the other person on the line that Eric is having a bad episode with his Dissociative Identity Disorder, and she needs to get the help of the other person on the other line. The person on the line is Krystal, who says, “Okay, I’ll be right over.”

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by  Kimberly Gore.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Episode List Rough Draft

What I learned doing this assignment is…how I needed to end the season, which I hadn’t planned out until now.

What is the Beginning of the season and the End of the season? Beginning is mystery surrounding who tried to kill Eric. Ending is discovering who it was and why.

What possible cliffhanger could be in that last scene of the season, thus demanding that we watch the next season? Learning that Eric has the same issue with past lives as Natalie does, and that he’s been hiding it all this time.

What is the mystery? Why did Natalie’s other personality try to kill Eric?

How could the mystery be set up? What parts will be left out that must be solved? What does Eric have to do with Natalie’s past? What happened that ruined the trajectory of their fate?

What it the ultimate solution that the characters must work to discover? Why Natalie’s personalities are trying to talk to her and what are they trying to say.

Where does the Lead Character journey begin and end for this season? Natalie works to understand why she can’t control the things she says and does while her husband struggles with the situation she has placed them in regarding his daughter.

Where might this character go in future seasons? How could that influence this season’s journey? She will be desperate to understand why one of her personalities doesn’t trust Eric and doesn’t want him in their lives.

What layers have you already discovered in your BW Framework? List written.

Story Lines

Episode 1:

Eric is attacked and Natalie discovers him. She rushes him to the hospital.

Clues point to her as the attacker.

We learn that Natalie has Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Episode 2:

Natalie’s sister shows up, high and angry, demanding money, threatening to spill Natalie’s secrets to Eric, including that Nat gave up her newborn son for adoption as a teenager.

Eric looks at his bank accounts after and notices money withdrawn at irregular intervals.

Episode 3:

Eric’s ex-wife, Danielle, doesn’t trust that Natalie should be near Eric’s daughter.

Even though Eric and Nat proclaim Nat’s innocence, Danielle is ready to take Eric to court for sole custody.

Natalie receives a cryptic message on her bathroom mirror.

Episode 4:

Eric asks his friend, Matt, to defend Natalie in her trial. Matt doesn’t want to do so, but Eric is his best friend, so he agrees.

Eric finds notes all around the house that Natalie must be writing to herself, but they make no sense to him.

Episode 5:

Natalie’s friend, LaDonna, notices Natalie’s concern that she might be indicted for a crime she never committed.

Natalie confides in her about the messages she’s receiving and glimpses into some life she never had, and LaDonna offers to have her meet her friend, a past life regression therapist.

Natalie thinks this is silly, but then a social worker comes to take Linnie out of their home, and Natalie freaks out (one of her past lives is a child that plays with Linnie).

Episode 6:

Eric becomes estranged, unable to deal with Natalie.

His mother tries to talk him into leaving Natalie.

Matt comes to Eric, explaining he can’t find a way to defend Natalie because he doesn’t want to protect the person that harmed his best friend.

Eric struggles to deal with this and leaves Natalie.

Episode 7:

Abandoned, Natalie tries to turn to her sister, who is too strung out to help.

She turns to LaDonna, who convinces her to call the therapist she recommended.

She meets with Krystal, who puts her under hypnosis. Natalie has a past life trauma come through and panics, tries to break down the door, and soars through Krystal’s window, cutting herself up in the process.

Episode 8:

Eric visits Nat in the hospital, blames himself for what happened because he wasn’t there for her.

Hints at knowing he wasn’t there for before, a long time ago, but Natalie doesn’t understand what he means.

He insists on going to her next therapy session where sparks fly with Krystal.

Episode 9:

Linnie comes over with Eric’s mother for supervised visitation.

Eric is very guarded with Natalie. He slips Natalie pills, which puts her to sleep during the visit. His mother approves.

While his mother fixes them lunch, he texts Krystal, and it’s sexual in nature.

Later, while he says bye to Linnie, Natalie wakes and sees a flirty message from Krystal come through Eric’s phone.

Episode 10:

Natalie confronts Eric, who honestly doesn’t seem to know what she’s talking about.

When she goes back to his phone to show him, the texts are not there. She wonders if she’s losing her mind. (Eric’s mother has deleted the conversation.)

Eric is confused, but his mother talks to him.

And then we learn that he is dealing with past life issues, too, which have been confused with Dissociative Identity Disorder.

He finds another note in the house and it reads, “Natalie must die.”

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by  Kimberly Gore.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Five Seasons

What I learned from doing this assignment is where each reveal should occur and how much of the mystery should be exposed during each season.

• Season 1: Natalie’s multiple personalities are her past lives trying to inform her of her destiny unless she can turn her present life around

• Season 2: Eric also suffers from this problem, but desperately tries to ignore it

• Season 3: Krystal has this issue, too, and is trying to sort it out by seducing Eric

• Season 4: The discovery of their pasts and how they are intertwined. There is a fourth person involved: Natalie’s son that she gave up for adoption when she was 16

• Season 5: Krystal and Eric are the ones who are supposed to be together, not Eric and Natalie, which is what Eric thought was the case. Natalie is tied to her son, instead.

3. For each season, brainstorm the Building Blocks.

Season 1: Death by Fire

• A. High Concept or major hook of the season. Natalie receives clues that point to her being the one who attacked her husband, but also that the true culprit was a woman from her past life. As she works through this, Eric is trying to keep her out of jail.

• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey: Eric has no backbone, no real fight in him when it comes to women. And Natalie needs him to love her despite the odds stacked against them.

• C. Main Conflict: Defending his wife while simultaneously trying to keep custody of his daughter from his first marriage. Natalie trying to understand what’s happening to her while Eric tries to quell her other personalities.

• D. Mystery/Open Loops: Why does Eric defend his wife so vehemently when she attempted to kill him? What secret does he harbor?

• E. Cliffhanger: He knows about Natalie and her past lives. But he hides that he is connected to her through these. At end of first season, we see that he is a part of her past and the death of a young woman burned to death in a barn fire.

How does a man play the cards he’s been dealt when the deck comes up half missing?

Respected psychiatrist Eric Howard stands up for his wife, Natalie, the person responsible for an attempt on his life. The reason? She suffers from Dissociative Identity Disorder. One of her personalities attempted his murder, not his doting wife of five years. A personality that died young in a horrific barn fire. But now Natalie proves to be a danger to society, and Eric’s ex-wife wants full custody of the daughter from his first marriage. Eric is used to being bullied by the women in his life: his mother, then his first wife. But it’s not just the custody battle that forces him to face the issues plaguing his marriage to Natalie. It’s the secret he’s been keeping from everyone up to now.

As a man trained in psychology, he should understand his own foibles and (detriments). But he won’t look into himself. He can’t. What he will find there will be too troubling, too frightening. Because the truth is…he suffers from Dissociative Identity Disorder, too. And as he eventually discovers, it’s related to the ties he has to Natalie through reincarnation.

Season 2: The Drowned Girl

• A. High Concept or major hook of the season. Mentor LaDonna introduces Natalie to Krystal, her own therapist. But when Krystal meets Eric, she’s attracted to him and jealous of Nat’s relationship with him.

• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey: Natalie discovers how her first past life brought her to this point: an accident that should never have happened.

• C. Main Conflict: As Natalie explores this further, Eric pulls away, afraid to confront his own past lives. It’s the perfect storm for Krystal to march in and sweep him off his unstable feet.

• D. Mystery/Open Loops: Why is Eric’s friend not interested in defending Natalie? Why does Eric feel so strongly about Krystal, even though they’ve never met? How is Eric connected to the Drowned Girl that keeps contacting Natalie?

• E. Cliffhanger: We discover that Krystal suffers from Dissociative Identity Disorder as well, and they have all been fated to meet again to sort things out.

Natalie needs people to know she did NOT try to kill her husband. One friend stands by her, LaDonna Ingels. The more they talk, the more LaDonna feels Nat’s soul might have memories of its past lives. She introduces her to a good friend, a past life regression therapist named Krystal Nicholson. The mystery of her past lives begins to unravel: her death as a young child, along with the boy who tried to save her, two adult witnesses who did nothing. Nothing. Nothing at all while she drowned an icy death.

And now, she feels the same slow death as the man who is supposed to help her, stand by her, love her, begins to pull away. He’s preoccupied by his ex-wife’s threat to have full custody of their daughter. His best friend, who is supposed to represent Natalie at her trial, detests Nat. And then there’s Nat’s therapist, Krystal, who swears she’s trying to help Natalie…but something doesn’t feel right. Eric looks at Krystal in a way he’s never looked at Natalie.

Not even LaDonna can help her now.

Season 3: No Accident

• A. High Concept or major hook of the season: Eric starts a secret affair with Krystal, but fears this will prevent him from fixing things for his past lives.

• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey: Krystal learns from Natalie, discovers they are intertwined. When Natalie tells the stories she discovers about her past lives, Krystal matches them with drawings her different personalities have drawn and painted over the years.

• C. Main Conflict: Krystal wants to bring Eric over to her side, she’s sure they belong together. But Eric and Natalie begin the understand that their past lives were linked and divided by tragedy.

• D. Mystery/Open Loops: How are they connected? Could Krystal be the reason why their souls could never rest? Was she a third wheel in all their lives?

• E. Cliffhanger: LaDonna discovers the affair Krystal is having with Eric. But before she can confront Natalie with the secret, Krystal kills her.

Krystal digs her claws into Eric’s heart, and he’s torn between his wife and the woman he lusts after. But he has too much going on to think about what he’s doing. His ex-wife is still trying to make his life hell, his mother can’t stop sticking her nose where it doesn’t belong, and his best friend isn’t helping his wife prepare properly for trial.

Meantime, Natalie’s regression therapy with Krystal is going well. Too well. Krystal is starting to recognize these stories. When she goes home, she finds the stories depicted in paintings and drawings she’s been creating since she was a kid. And now she knows. She’s the one meant for Eric. Natalie has brought him nothing but tragedy.

Except her friend LaDonna, the one who introduced her to Natalie, discovers the affair with Eric. And she threatens to go to Natalie. But one of Krystal’s personalities sees exactly what’s happening. It can’t happen. Because once Krystal knows, it will mess everything up. Eric has to make this work organically. But LaDonna is unstoppable. Angry. And there’s only one way to keep the secret, even if it means getting rid of the source.

Season 4: Strangled Victim

• A. High Concept or major hook of the season: Eric is trying to cool down the affair, he has bigger issues. His daughter is sneaking around behind his back. Linnie is now “talking” to a boy online.

• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey: Natalie gets to know the third past life she had, and comes to realize that Krystal may play a part in it

• C. Main Conflict: Natalie wants to trust Krystal, but something is off. And she has no one to talk to, now that her best friend has stopped showing up to yoga class…and oddly only speaks with her via texting.

• D. Mystery/Open Loops: Where is LaDonna? What has Krystal done to her?

• E. Cliffhanger: The boy Linnie is talking to shows up at her house. And he doesn’t seem on the up-and-up.

Backing off from the affair, Eric struggles between his wife, who is distraught over her friend missing for days, his daughter, who is sneaking behind his back talking to some mystery boy online, and Krystal, who continues to dog him, reminding him that Natalie deserves to be locked up. She’s certainly not sane.

Natalie receives texts from her friend, but they’re so…cryptic. Odd. Not like LaDonna at all. Something’s not right. Meantime, another personality takes front stage, forcing Natalie to see another past life, another doomed life, another tragic death. And now she’s noticing something else…two other people always seem to be around…and one of them….one of them she is certain is Krystal. When she breaks into Krystal’s house to search for clues to where LaDonna might be, or the possible affair with Eric, she sees the drawings and the paintings.

But that same night, the night she is breaking into Krystal’s house, Eric is out with Krystal, trying to end the affair. And his daughter, alone at the house, is waiting for someone. He shows up, smiling, but something feels off. Because when he enters her house, he’s intrigued by her family. When the door closes, it feels ominous.

Season 5: And Then There Were Four

• A. High Concept or major hook of the season: Not only has Natalie discovered the paintings, proof that Krystal is a part of their past, but she finds LaDonna’s phone. Eric finds out about the boy Linnie is sneaking into the house and the real reason he’s there.

• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey: Eric realizes his soulmate isn’t Natalie. It’s never been Natalie. And to right their fate, he has to make a drastic decision. And this time, he needs to make it on his own without anyone’s help.

• C. Main Conflict: Natalie knows Krystal has been working against her. But her trial is set for tomorrow, and she’s not sure if Eric will be on her side, or Krystal’s.

• D. Mystery/Open Loops: Who is the boy Linnie is seeing? And what does he want?

• E. Cliffhanger: Natalie is sent to prison, she discovers the boy Linnie is seeing is her son, and it’s possible that if the boy and Linnie remain together, fate once again will twist the wrong way.

Suspecting that Eric is having an affair with her therapist, Natalie breaks into Krystal’s home for proof and discovers the paintings and drawings Natalie has created about their past lives. Natalie’s eyes are opened: Krystal is the one who has always gotten in the way of Eric and Natalie’s fated relationship! But as she’s searching further through the house, she discovers LaDonna’s phone. Why would it be at Krystal’s home? This means LaDonna hasn’t been contacting Natalie after all.

Eric discovers Linnie has been sneaking the boy she met online into their home. He confronts him, and the boy admits he’s not there for Linnie. Natalie is his mother. But Eric doesn’t want this kid he’s never even heard of meddling in their affairs and kicks him out, threatening to call the authorities if he shows up again. He has too many other problems right now, especially since he’s been paying more attention to his past lives and now realizes he’s supposed to be with Krystal, not Natalie. And in order to right the wrongs of his past, he will have to send Natalie to prison.

Natalie loses the court case and is devastated that her husband turned against her. But in prison, she receives a letter from a boy claiming to be her son. She asks him to meet her, and after seventeen years of separation, they see each other and discover they have been with each other for many lifetimes. He is the other person in her memories. And he has issues with past lives, too. But before he leaves, he tells her he feels he is fated to be with Linnie.

Natalie knows that he is twisting fate once more, and if he ends up with Linnie, the cycle will never be broken.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Character Descriptions

What I learned doing this assignment is how to brainstorm my characters ahead of time. Again, I’m a total “pantser.” This was not easy. 🙂

• Who is the character? Role in the show? ERIC His wounded soul is based on past lives filled with people carrying out difficult duties for him, tending to his every whim, and not allowing him to fully mature and develop into a strong male figure capable of taking care of himself and a family.

• Noteworthy traits: He hides his other personalities. Self-medicates both with prescription drugs and alcohol. He is scared of the control his ex-wife has over him.

• Intriguing history: All through his past lives he has an overbearing woman telling him what to do and how to do it. He both fights this infringement on his boundaries and welcomes it. He resents not being trusted enough to have the skill and intelligence to solve his own problems, but he also lacks problem-solving skills, in part because he’s always being told what to do and second guesses his own instincts. He married a woman who was like his mother, condescending and making him feel less like a man. He married Danielle because she was “comfortable” to him, he was used to being told what to do and how to do it. But bitterness eventually crept in. When he met Natalie, there was a different type of “comfortableness.” A familiarity (based on their past lives) emerged, and he began an intense affair with her, even though she was his patient and under his care at the time. But she looked up to him, and saw him differently than his wife did. And that was alluring.

• Intrigue? Mystery? He suffers from the same issues Natalie does, but is better at hiding it from the world, including from the therapist they sometimes see together. Even Natalie doesn’t know his problem at the start of the show.

• How do they support or drive the conflict with others? He wants to make everything appear “normal,” even as Natalie is trying to explore why they are having so many issues in their lives and their relationship with one another. He also feels an unexplainable pull towards Krystal, even though she threatens the relationship he has with Natalie.

• Irony — Opposites or paradoxes that exist with the character: He is a psychiatrist, understands psychology, but can’t understand himself

• Opposing agendas/etc. that naturally causes conflict with other characters: His indecision, his ability to put a problem on a back-burner and disengage with it

• Unpredictable? If Eric feels a personality coming through, he takes great pains to suddenly leave and find a quiet spot until it subsides. He also takes medication that quells the personalities.

• Intriguing relationship with one or more characters: Resentment and bitterness towards women in general, but especially with his mother and ex-wife. His need to bring up his daughter to respect men and not put them down, which she is a constant witness to seeing. His passion for Krystal. But deep love for his wife.

• Past lives: Henry (1865), Jeremiah (1905), Donald (1955)

Eric has a past. Actually, many pasts. From the small child trying to do the right thing to the young man unable to control his urges. Because he’s been reincarnated, and each life is trying to help him not make another mistake, dooming his soul to yet another short-lived fate. Except he isn’t the type to fix things. In fact, he’s used to the women in his life taking care of everything. But now, he has a wife and daughter to take care of. And unless he lives his life the way he’s supposed to live it, choosing the right people to be with him, his soul will remain restless, weary, and only suited for death.

• Who is the character? Role in the show? NATALIE Wife with past lives, yoga instructor

• Noteworthy traits: Her past lives are always trying to get her attention, she struggles with self-esteem and communication

• Intriguing history: She grew up poor, was considered “low class” in all her past lives, has to work to overcome this. Has a sister who is constantly asking for handouts to support her drug addiction.

• Intrigue? Mystery? Why do messages keep popping up for her? Who is writing them?

• How do they support or drive the conflict with others? She wants to know what her past selves are telling her…why they’re contacting her. But Eric doesn’t want to go further into this. And Krystal wants Natalie to doubt her own sanity.

• Irony — Opposites or paradoxes that exist with the character Meditation is her specialty, and yet her anxiety makes it difficult

• Opposing agendas/etc. that naturally causes conflict with other characters

• Unpredictable? Her personalities come out at inopportune times without warning

• Intriguing relationship with one or more characters LaDonna is her friend and confidant and the only one who knows about the son Nat gave up for adoption when she was 16.

• Beth (1865), Harriet (1905), Linda (1955)

Like her husband, Natalie is living a life in a series of lives, each one suffering from mistakes of the past. Desperate to figure out how to turn her life around, she listens to the people in her head. And enlists the help of a therapist trained in past life regression. Except her therapist leaves her feeling even more confused. Because while Natalie is trying to figure things out, her husband and therapist seem bent on putting her away. Natalie’s a fighter, she’s been that way since she was a kid living in poverty. But she has to differentiate the line between friend and foe.

• Who is the character? Role in the show? KRYSTAL Nat’s therapist, also deals with past life issues

• Noteworthy traits: Seductress, stemming from her past life selves. The only way she can capture a man’s attention is to be his fantasy.

• Intriguing history: Wheels of fate turned when in 1865 she lost her son to his desire to rescue a girl not worthy of him. She set the girl’s death into motion.

• Intrigue? Mystery? Although she is Nat’s therapist, she is also her rival

• How do they support or drive the conflict with others? She is the wedge between Eric and Natalie, learning their secrets and using them against one another

• Irony — Opposites or paradoxes that exist with the character She wants to be a good person, tries to help others through therapy and care, but also wants to destroy Natalie.

• Opposing agendas/etc. that naturally causes conflict with other characters When LaDonna sees what Krystal is trying to do, they get into an altercation leading to LaDonna’s death

• Unpredictable? She makes decisions based on emotion, not intellect; she’s impulsive.

• Intriguing relationship with one or more characters The desire she and Eric have with one another is intense, and Eric can’t hold out forever.

• Judith (1865), Annabella (1905), Marlene (1955)

Krystal is in a love triangle between Eric and Natalie. Like them, she, too, is living out a reincarnated life. But she also knows that while Eric and Natalie are married, she’s the one Eric should be with. And she’ll go to any lengths to seduce him. The artist in her paints depictions of her past lives, and they tell a story of failure and defeat. But in this life, she sees things she never could in her past lives. In this life, she’ll win Eric over and the world will be righted again.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Intriguing Concept and World

I learned how to streamline the plot into something simple, even though my idea is complex.

1. Present your Concept.

• A charismatic yet spineless psychiatrist

• defends his wife accused of attempting to murder him

• so he can protect his marriage, career, and reputation

• as they mend the damage their past life selves have done to them.

2. Tell us the World of this show.

• Unique Sub-World: Past lives trying to communicate with the present lives

• Previously unexplored: How to fix the mistakes of one’s past lives

• The unknown: If it’s possible to fix a fate that has gone off the rails

• The unseen: Not everyone is whom they seem to be; how can we know who is supposed to be connected to us eternally?

• Unheard of Dangers: When a soul will do anything to protect its past

• Reason to explore it: The love triangle will never undo itself on its own; lives are doomed to unhappiness until fate is back on course

[Kimberly Gore]

Hey, everyone! Where do we go to post our work for Module 2? I can’t seem to find it anywhere.

-Kim

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim Gore has completed the BW framework!

What I learned doing this process is that I feel I had a lot of repetition when putting together the framework, and I feel like I should be able to find more places to amp up the drama. I may need to brainstorm further.

[Kimberly Gore]

Example Show: Secrets and Lies

Biggest irony – Ben has been looking for the person who killed his son and all this time it’s been a person living right under his nose, someone he loves and trusts.

Even though his daughter was trying to keep their family together, she pulled them all further apart.

The more Ben tried to persuade people of his innocence, the more he convinced people of his guilt.

ASSIGNMENT 2: Your Show

Kim’s Creating Irony!

What I learned doing this assignment are places to hone in on, making sure I give greater depth to my characters and their situations.

The biggest irony is that the whole time we think Eric and Natalie are meant for each other, and that Krystal is about to ruin their soulmate situation, only to realize Krystal is the one meant for Eric.

Eric pretends he doesn’t have an issue with his personalities. He wants people to like and respect him. The irony: He’ll feel a personality breaking through and leave so that he doesn’t show it to anyone, which makes him come off like an asshole.

Natalie is the “perfect wife, stepmom, neighbor” etc., acting like she has everything together. But at home alone she cries, scared she’ll be found out that she’s not at all who she pretends to be.

Eric is a psychiatrist, yet he is horribly crippled by his own mental issues.

Natalie is a yoga instructor, yet her anxiety is sky-high.

Eric makes poor decisions and has bad judgement, yet Natalie looks to him to guide her.

Natalie hates being ignored, hates being walked away from, yet married a man who does just that when he can’t handle pressure.

Natalie trusts Krystal more than anyone, yet Krystal wants to destroy Natalie.

Krystal loves to seduce men, make them her playthings, yet she finds herself repulsive.

Natalie grew up taking care of her brother Jeff, and now he needs to take care of her. (COULD JEFF BE JUSTINE, A SISTER???)

LaDonna is Natalie’s best friend, yet she leads her to Krystal, who is going to ruin Natalie’s life. This, in turn, leads to LaDonna’s demise.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Show Plot and Character Layers

What I learned from doing this is how to interlace characters with their opposing motives, needs, and desires.

Plot Surface:

Layer 1: Mystery: Someone stabs Eric in a murderous rage and his wife Natalie discovers him and calls an ambulance. Circumstantial evidence points to Natalie being the killer, but she is shocked at the accusation and the police don’t have enough to go on, plus her husband denies it was her.

Layer 2: Eric takes Natalie to his friend Matt, a lawyer. Matt doesn’t like Natalie, and we don’t know why.

Layer 3: Natalie acts different around the neighborhood. She puts on a good show, acting like she comes from money. But we learn she has a very different type of background.

Layer 4: Danielle threatens to take Linnie from Eric. Natalie is too unstable.

Layer 5: As the stress mounts, Eric’s personalities come out one by one. Now we know he suffers from the same condition Natalie does.

Layer 6: We find out Natalie had a baby as a teen and gave up that baby boy for adoption. Eric doesn’t know. She can’t have children anymore as a result of a bad birth.

Layer 7: Eric’s mother is always stopping over, always trying to help Eric, Natalie can’t stand it. Makes things worse by kicking her out of their house.

Layer 8: We learn that Eric and Natalie each have three personalities besides their own.

Layer 9: Eric drops the ball as Natalie’s lawyer.

Layer 10: Eric can’t deny his attraction to Krystal.

Layer 11: Other personalities come through and Natalie becomes an angry, overly sexual teenager.

Layer 12: Her other personality, a young adult, attacks Krystal.

Layer 13: We learn Krystal suffers from D.I.D., too.

Layer 14: LaDonna helps Natalie search for her son.

Layer 15: Natalie finds her son, but is about to be arraigned in court.

Layer 16: Their souls’ lives’ backgrounds are fully recognized.

Layer 17: We learn Krystal’s soul and Eric’s soul were meant to be together after all this time.

Layer 18: Natalie’s soul and her son’s soul are also meant to be together.

Layer 19: Natalie’s son meets Eric’s daughter.

Character Surface:

Layer 1: Nat confides in LaDonna, and we learn Nat is being treated by Eric for D.I.D.

Layer 2: One of Nat’s personalities is a child.

Layer 3: Eric married Matt’s sister, Danielle, had a child (Linnie), met Natalie (a client) and left Danielle for Nat.

Layer 4: LaDonna introduces Nat to her therapist, Krystal.

Layer 5: Hidden relationships and conspiracies: Natalie’s brother is strung out on narcotics, always comes to Natalie for money. If she tries to cut him off, he tells her that he’ll spill her Big Secret to Eric. There’s something Eric doesn’t know??? Why?

Layer 6: Hidden Character history: Natalie’s background…prostitute mother, drug-addicted father…she pretends her past doesn’t exist.

Layer 7: Krystal tells Natalie that her family history and the wounds left behind are what causes her multiple personalities. She asks for Eric to join their sessions.

Layer 8: Matt, Natalie’s lawyer, confesses that he hasn’t been “all in” because he still harbors resentment that she “stole” Eric from his sister Danielle.

Layer 9: We see that Krystal is attracted to Eric. Her attitude changes. She wants to be sure to get his phone number. “For Natalie’s sake.”

Layer 10: Eric’s mother dotes on him, even now, and tries to “fix” things for him. But she sees Natalie’s issues, has always wondered if she might be dangerous. Wants him to leave Natalie.

Layer 11: The personalities become unleashed. Eric, trying to deal with his overbearing mom, the attraction to Krystal, possibly losing his daughter in a custody battle, learning Natalie has a son “out there,” that she’s been slipping money to her brother.

Layer 12: Natalie, with all the times she’s tried to hang on to Eric, all her personalities entwining him and Krystal. Krystal’s soul getting in the way and their untimely deaths because of it.

Layer 13: She cannot hide her personalities from the world anymore, they are furious. Fast. But if she becomes locked up, she will lose Eric to Krystal, and her soul won’t be able to live out its purpose. Because, she knows, it will only rest when she has her soulmate.

Layer 14: But Krystal needs Eric. Will do anything to tear Natalie away from him. Her soul has never succeeded before, Eric and Natalie’s bodies have died before her soul could live out its life with them. So, she must make sure Natalie is locked up.

Layer 15: A remarkable things happens in court…a battle of the personalities.

Layer 16: Natalie is placed is an asylum in lieu of jail. Her son visits, and she ends up oddly content.

Layer 17: Natalie’s soul is at peace with her son, she has learned how to be a fighter and resiliency.

Layer 18: Eric’s soul is with Krystal’s, he has learned to be self-sufficient and think for himself.

Layer 19: Linnie and Natalie’s son meet, and Natalie’s soul is threatened once more.

[Kimberly Gore]

EXAMPLE SHOW: Secrets and Lies

Plot Surface:

Layer 1: Tom is murdered, Ben discovers his body in the woods.

Layer 2: People, including a detective, accuse Ben of the murder.

Layer 3: A neighbor dislikes Ben, we don’t know why.

Layer 4: Mystery: The night of the murder, Ben had a fight with Christie. He went out with his friend Dave, but doesn’t remember much about that night.

Layer 5: After giving a DNA sample, Ben learns he is Tom’s father. Hidden history: Ben had an affair with a neighbor.

Layer 6: Red herrings: He believes Jess’s estranged husband murdered Tom, and gets into a fight with him. He believes an autistic neighbor has killed Tom, and intrudes into his family’s home. More possibilities, and Ben goes after each one in a violent manner.

Layer 7: Scheme: Evidence has been planted in his car, and Ben makes the poor decision to hide it. Someone places similar items to the murder weapon around Ben’s house to mess with him.

Layer 8: The neighbor who dislikes Ben knows about the affair and his past trauma with infidelity from his wife comes out and he attacks Ben.

Layer 9: We learn that one of the people doing sneaky things is his daughter’s previous boyfriend.

Layer 10: Hidden history: Jess has mental issues and now we’re set up to think it is her based on the detective’s knowledge that it’s a female killer.

Layer 11: We find out Jess is innocent, now it looks like Christie is the killer.

Layer 12: Ben discovers his twelve-year-old daughter killed Tom and she swears it was an accident. Ben decides to take the fall for his sweet, innocent daughter.

Layer 13: At the very end, we realize the murder was intentional and his daughter is like Ben…prone to violence. But for evil.

Character Surface:

Layer 1: Ben doesn’t think he would ever hurt this child, but can’t remember the night Tom was killed.

Layer 2: Police and reporters harass Ben, and he is desperate to find the killer so he and his family will be left alone.

Layer 3: He accuses Tom’s dad, and we learn Ben is quick to judge.

Layer 4: His neighbor is out to get him.

Layer 5: Ben distrusts everyone, even his best friend.

Layer 6: His children are distraught over Tom’s death…so we think.

Layer 7: Jess turns out to be obsessive over Ben, and acts nuts. Maybe she killed her own son.

Layer 8: Christie has a secret life with another man. Perhaps SHE killed Tom.

Layer 9: Young Abby secretly was jealous of Tom and didn’t like that her dad always wanted a son.

[Kimberly Gore]

Example Show: Secrets and Lies

Big Picture Loops:

Did Ben have anything to do with his son’s murder?

Will Ben and Christie get back together?

Who killed Tom?

What does Detective Cornell know that she’s hiding?

Kim’s Big Picture Open Loops

What I learned doing this assignment is that I need to make sure the pilot holds intrigue and mystery through withheld information and hints of answers yet to come.

My Open Loops:

If Nat really tried to murder Eric, then why?

Why is Krystal so interested in Nat’s relationship with Eric? What are her motives for getting so entangled in their problems?

Why is Eric so loyal to his wife, even though she may have tried to kill him?

What secrets are Eric trying so hard to hide from everyone, even his wife?

Will Nat be able to control her different personalities, or will they destroy her?

What does Krystal know that she’s not telling anyone?

[Kimberly Gore]

Sample Show: Secrets and Lies

Big Picture Mystery: Who killed Ben’s son? And why can’t he remember that night?

Smaller Mysteries: Finds a child’s size tooth in his jacket, why is it there? Is his wife hiding money from him? Why?

Kim’s Show Mysteries

What I learned doing this assignment is…as I brainstormed the mysteries within my story, I realized what the Big Twist of my show would be.

A. Shocking Event: Someone attacks Eric with a knife while he’s on the phone with someone. The woman on the other end of the line hears him yell, “Natalie, stop!”

B. Secret: His wife is arrested for the attempted murder, although she doesn’t remember anything about it and is certain she’s innocent.

C. Investigation: The audience will wonder: Why would she want her husband dead? Why is her husband sticking up for her, even though it seems like a clear-cut case?

What: Natalie is being treated for Dissociative Identity Disorder by both her husband Eric, who is also her psychologist, and her therapist Krystal.

When: During a week of turmoil, when Natalie hasn’t been herself at all. Literally.

Where: An upper-class suburban housing track where people have all sorts of secrets hidden away.

Why: We will later learn that Eric and Krystal have a lot of built-up sexual tension because of their attraction to one another.

Who: The only people aware of Natalie’s D.I.D. are Eric and Krystal.

How: Could one of Natalie’s personalities have attempted to murder Eric?

Part Withheld: Her Dissociative Identity Disorder is actually her soul’s past lives.

A. Cover up: Eric protects his wife while Krystal pretends to stand by both of them. But she is obsessed with separating them.

B. Secret: That Natalie, Eric, and Krystal all suffer from the same type of D.I.D. Their souls are all connected through past lives.

C. Reveals: The first life, as children, starts with an unsolved murder and ends with both of their untimely demises. In their second life, they’re teenagers when they die. They make it to their twenties in their third life. Each time, the common denominator of their unfulfilled fates is a third soul.

What: Each of their souls lived in a body that died young because the souls never connected with each other, thanks to human consequences of the mind.

When: Three different decades. And then this one.

Where: Three different places besides this place, but all hold similar consequences for who they are as lost souls.

Why: Their souls were disturbed as children when a horrible accident bent back the hands of fate.

Who: Children. Teenagers. Young adults. Adults.

How: These parts of them are trying to communicate with their physical hosts. Warning them. Fighting for them to finally do the right thing. Be the people they were meant to be before everything was messed up. Make changes, do what’s right.

Part Withheld: The entire time, we think that it’s Natalie and Eric who are supposed to be together. We think Krystal is the one who has messed up their fate. But in the end, it’s Krystal and Eric who were fated to be together.

[Kimberly Gore]

Secrets and Lies

A. Undeserved misfortune. Ben comes across a murdered boy’s body and is considered a murder suspect. He discovers through a DNA test that the boy is his son.

B. External Character conflicts. Ben’s affair with the neighbor. Ben trusts no one.

C. Plot intruding on life. Ben tries to solve his son’s murder, but goes about it in every wrong way, thereby turning friends into enemies.

D. Moral dilemmas. Getting rid of evidence. Hiding what he is doing from his wife.

E. Forced decisions they’d never make. Pushing family away.

Kim’s Show Empathy/Distress

What I learned from doing this assignment is that Big Picture distress can run through a multitude of episodes, even as the smaller events providing it can differ in structure and idea.

A. Undeserved misfortune. Natalie arrested for attempted murder. Danielle tries to keep Linnie from Eric based on the possible conviction and Eric’s certainty of Natalie’s innocence.

B. External Character conflicts. Natalie’s Dissociative Identity Disorder diagnosis which is actually her soul’s past lives coming through. Krystal’s desire to steer Eric’s interest from his wife to her.

C. Plot intruding on life. Eric weathering the storm of personalities that appear now that their current lives are in chaos.

D. Moral dilemmas. Does he turn on his wife so she will be put away in jail forever and thereby protect his rights to his child, or does he risk losing Linnie to his ex-wife in order to help Natalie? Does he give in to his desire for Krystal, or does he continue to be faithful to his wife, despite her possible downward spiral?

E. Forced decisions they’d never make. Eric comes clean about his past lives. Natalie denies hers and pleads guilty to attempted murder.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Show’s Relationship Map

What I learned from doing this assignment is that relationships can be layered…AND connected. I hadn’t started out connecting Eric’s best friend (Matt) to Eric’s first wife (Danielle) or Natalie’s friend (LaDonna) to Natalie’s therapist (Krystal). But once I saw it evolve, it made more sense and gave me more places to create tension and conflict.

ERIC

Linnie

Surface daughter

Common Ground Quick-thinking on her feet

Conflict He hides a lot from her, and she senses it

History Divorced when she was five

Subtext Doesn’t fully trust her father

Relationship Arc From unconditional love to hate to love again

Danielle

Surface Ex-wife

Common Ground Love their daughter

Conflict Never felt she was “the one”

History Met Eric through her brother, Matt

Subtext Has never forgiven Eric for leaving her for Natalie

Relationship Arc From love to apathy

Matt

Surface Best friend

Common Ground Danielle…Matt is Danielle’s brother

Conflict Matt doesn’t like Eric’s wife Natalie, probably shouldn’t be representing her in court

History Known each other since seventh grade

Subtext Anger over what Eric did to his sister, even as he helps Eric and Natalie out

Relationship Arc From trust to mistrust to taking time to trust again

Natalie’s three are Eric, LaDonna, and Jeff

Krystal’s are Eric, Natalie, and LaDonna

All mapped out on my own sheets. 🙂

[Kimberly Gore]

Sample Show: Secrets and Lies

Ben’s Relationships Episode 6

KEVIN

Surface Neighbors, military surveillance career

Common Ground Hiding Ben’s affair

Conflict Thinks Ben killed Tom, thinks he’s selfish and disrespectful

History Friends at one time, saw Kevin cheating with a soldier’s wife

Subtext Is exacting revenge for something that happened to him

Relationship Arc Friends to mortal enemies

JESS

Surface Neighbor, had a fling with Ben

Common Ground Dramatic measures to get info Son Tom, sadness and anger over Tom’s murder, hiding the fling

Conflict She seems like she wants more than he does relationship-wise

History Got to know each other better at Kevin’s 4th of July party

Subtext Might just need a friend whom can relate with her

Relationship Arc Friends to estranged

DET. CORNELL

Surface adversary

Common Ground finding who killed Tom

Conflict They don’t trust one another

History she’s made him the number one suspect

Subtext She is looking at things from all angles

Relationship Arc Acting like his enemy, but being his rescuer

• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Kimberly Gore.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Kimberly Gore.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Character Emotions

What I learned doing this assignment is that my characters’ motivations can create conflict both in their heads and with others, which is something I don’t tend to plan ahead of time, so this is interesting that I’m producing this before creating the story. I’m curious to see if this will make it easier or more difficult as I forge forward with my intentional outlining.

ERIC HOWARD

• A. Situational: Hope – everything works itself out / Fear – To hurt the people he loves

• B. Motivation: Want – Control / Need – to be admired, respected

• C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – anger, helplessness / Public Mask – the charmer, the intellect, the Perfect Man

• D. Weaknesses – He is a poor decision maker

• E. Triggers – Being told what to do

• F. Coping Mechanism – Turning off his emotions, drinking

NATALIE HOWARD

• A. Situational: Hope – To live a normal life / Fear – That she’ll die without finding peace

• B. Motivation: Want – to love her husband unconditionally/ Need – to be loved/liked

• C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – she’s unlovable, broken / Public Mask –conceited bitch

• D. Weaknesses – pity

• E. Triggers – being ignored, walked away from

• F. Coping Mechanism – self-harm, verbal lashing

KRYSTAL NICHOLSON

• A. Situational: Hope – to in Eric’s affection / Fear – to end up alone

• B. Motivation: Want – to be with her “soulmate” / Need – to feel loved/wanted

• C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – victim / Public Mask – helper, benevolent

• D. Weaknesses – attention seeker

• E. Triggers – being judged

• F. Coping Mechanism – biting wit

MARILYNN (LINNIE) HOWARD

• A. Situational: Hope – to have a “normal” family / Fear – teased by peers

• B. Motivation: Want – To be liked / Need – To be understood

• C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion – sadness / Public Mask – aloofness

• D. Weaknesses – her father’s compassion and attention

• E. Triggers – when someone makes a remark about her family

• F. Coping Mechanism – fights

[Kimberly Gore]

Assignment#1 Secrets and Lies

BEN

• A. Situational: Hopes he can keep his family together / fears his wife is involved with another man

• B. Motivation: Wants to be believed / Needs to find Tom’s killer so he can be exonerated of the crime

• C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: anger / Public Mask: victim

• D. Weaknesses: He reacts without thinking

• E. Triggers: his family being harmed, not being trusted, his past thrown in his face

• F. Coping Mechanism: confrontation

KRISTI

• A. Situational: Hopes she can handle her emotional trauma / Fears she will never be able to forgive Ben’s betrayal

• B. Motivation: Wants to make everything go away / Needs to feel loved and desired

• C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: jealousy / Public Mask: the hard worker

• D. Weaknesses: empathy, powerlessness, guilt

• E. Triggers: seeing the neighbor with whom her husband had an affair

• F. Coping Mechanism: shutting down, avoidance, workaholic

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim’s Intriguing Character Layers

What I learned doing this assignment is…that coming up with these layers is hard work! But it really made me think hard about their motivations.

Character Name: Eric Howard

• Role: Husband with past lives, father to a child from his first wife, psychiatrist.

• Hidden agendas: He doesn’t understand why this is happening to him, doesn’t even know how to fix it, but more than anything he wants it to just go away and will do anything to pretend it doesn’t exist.

• Secrets: He hides his past lives/multiple personalities/Dissociative Identity Disorder from everyone, even from his wife.

• Deception: Although his personalities bleed through his calm exterior, he finds ways to manage them, even at the risk of self-harm.

• Wound: His past is a series of open wounds, starting from the very first time he ever fell in love…in 1865. His first soul: scarred from the inside out, a messy love triangle that shattered his life and destroyed the path of his fate.

• Secret Identity: Three identities within him, one soul that never reached maturity.

Character Name: Natalie Howard

• Role: Originally Eric’ patient, now his second wife.

• Hidden agendas: To fit into her neighborhood, she needs to fill the role of happy suburban stepmom. Her acting is superb.

• Competition: Feels competitive with their therapist, as if she and Krystal are both vying for Eric’s attention, although she doesn’t understand why.

• Conspiracies: She needs to fix this life that’s going down the same damn path all her other lives had traversed. But she needs Eric to cooperate. And he’s not willing to work on it with her. But maybe her therapist can help her, if they could just team up.

• Secrets: Suffers from Dissociative Identity Disorder brought on by past lives and can’t quell it, so she embraces it, lets it mold her. Her personalities speak to her through messages left written on mirrors in lipstick, or spelled out as underlined phrases in books.

• Deception: She’s the Good Wife, the Amazing Stepmom, the Emphatic Yoga Instructor, everything’s perfect.

• Wound: Her soul aches; every love affair she has had throughout her past lives has ended in catastrophe. Her personalities hint that there’s a way to repair the damage, a way to escape, but she has work to do.

• Secret Identity: Three identities within her that correspond to Eric’s three…and then one violent one that shows up unexpectedly, the one that begins the domino effect.

Character Name: Krystal Nicholson

• Role: Therapist with past lives.

• Hidden agendas: To get in-between Eric and Natalie’s relationship, as she has done in all of their past lives, she is their Big Test.

• Competition: She enjoys the competition, has never had trouble getting any man to pay attention to her, to love her, to do bad things for her.

• Conspiracies: Pretends to go along with Natalie’s plans to help her get through to Eric, and tries to open Eric up like a clam.

• Secrets: This feeling that she belongs with Eric, that he is her destiny, won’t go away. But she can’t allow Nat and Eric to feel her need. And she can’t let them know that she, too, suffers from past lives/Dissociative Identity Disorder.

• Deception: She learns their secrets, knows what will break them, knows what will force them apart. Pretends to be on their side.

• Wound: In her past lives, starting from the love 1865 triangle, she never won Eric’s heart. She can get anyone she wants. Why can’t she have HIM?

• Secret Identity: Although she’s Nat’s therapist, she’s also her rival. And she will win Eric’s heart, even if it kills all three of them.

[Kimberly Gore]

Assignment #1 Part 1

• Role: Ben, father of murdered child and main suspect

• Hidden agendas: wants to find real killer so he’s off the hook for the murder

• Secrets: He doesn’t know where he was the night of Tom’s murder but pretends he does, he sneaks out to see the woman with whom he’s had a child so he can try to solve the murder

• Deception: He hides the murder weapon that has been placed in his possession, he lies about remembering how he made it home the night Tom was murdered

• Wound: that his wife and daughter are hiding something crucial from him

• Secret Identity: he’s Tom’s father

• Role: Kristi, Ben’s wife

• Secrets: hiding their daughter’s possible pregnancy from Ben

• Deception: she wears expensive earrings given to her as a “gift” from a client

• Wound: Ben cheated on her with their neighbor

Assignment #1 Part 2

• Character Name: Ben

• Role: the murdered boy’s father, lead suspect

• Hidden agendas: keeps accusing other people about harming his family or killing his son without any proof, just circumstantial evidence

• Conspiracies: finds out his male neighbor is hiding past sexual misconduct accusations and abuse charges

• Secrets: finds pictures of his neighbor’s abused son and a child abuse form while at his neighbor’s house and sneaks photos of them, the guy he works for is a reporter

• Deception: lies about passing the lie detective test (which was actually inconclusive), his daughter has deceived him about going to a concert with his best friend, his friend also does not give out that information until much later, pretends to use the bathroom but instead searches neighbor’s house

• Wound: thinks his best friend hurt his daughter

[Kimberly Gore]

Assignment #2

Subject line: Kim’s Engaging Main Characters

What I learned doing this assignment is: how to find all the places where my characters either grow together or grow apart. It pushes me to create more layered personalities as I consider predicaments where conflict can arise.

1. My show’s journey is about two people desperately trying to make their relationship work so they can free their reincarnated souls from continuing to live out tragedy.

2. Who are the main characters that will sell your show? Eric and Natalie Howard

3. Answer these questions for each of those characters.

• A. Role in the show:

Eric: His wounded soul is based on past lives filled with people carrying out difficult duties for him, tending to his every whim, and not allowing him to fully mature and develop into a strong male figure capable of taking care of himself and a family.

Natalie: Her anguished soul has spent too many past lives pushing people away and developing such a thick skin, even love can’t break through without fear of being seen without her emotional mask.

• B. Unique Purpose / Expertise:

Eric: He is a psychiatrist, trained in both medication and psychology.

Natalie: She is very much in tune with who she is and the problems she faces. She just doesn’t know how to get from A to Z without making what might be a fatal error in judgement.

• C. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface?

Eric: He suffers from the same issues Natalie does, but is better at hiding it from the world, including from the therapist they sometimes see together. Even Natalie doesn’t know his problem at the start of the show.

Natalie: At first, she thinks she suffers from dissociative identity disorder, as this has been her diagnosis all her life. But it becomes apparent, thanks to hypnosis sessions with her therapist, that her multiple personalities are the past lives her soul has had.

• D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing?

Eric: He illegally prescribes himself medication to stop his four personalities from coming through. He surreptitiously gives his wife medication to help her stay asleep when his daughter is with them overnight. And he has a dangerous, flirtatious relationship with their therapist.

Natalie: She tries to kill Eric, even if it really was one of her personalities doing the deed.

• E. Unpredictable: What will they do next?

Eric: If Eric feels a personality coming through, he takes great pains to suddenly leave and find a quiet spot until it subsides. He also takes medication that quells the personalities.

Natalie: Natalie is equally unpredictable, except she cannot control her personalities and often acts out through them.

• F. Empathetic: Why do we care?

Eric: He loves his daughter so much, but fears she will be taken from the family because of Natalie’s instability. He also loves Natalie and although his soul knows she’s “the one,” she doesn’t make it easy for him to deal with her.

Natalie: She wants so much to be loved by Eric, has never felt true unconditional love from anyone before, so it’s hard for her to feel safe. Also, she’s afraid the people in her neighborhood will think she’s a phony if they realize her low-class upbringing. When one of her personalities tries to murder Eric, she’s at an all-time low.

[Kimberly Gore]

Assignment #1

Secrets and Lies

Role in the Show

Ben Crawford: husband and father suspected of murdering the neighbor’s child, who is his illegitimate son.

Kristi Crawford: Ben’s wife, trying to hold it together as she deals with the aftermath of discovering her husband cheated on her and had a child with another woman. She is still his support system throughout the ordeal, although has distanced herself emotionally.

Unique Purpose/Expertise

Ben: Expertise: Knows the neighborhood and how each person relates to one another

Purpose: To find out who killed this child and exonerate himself so he can properly grieve his loss

Kristi: Expertise: She is their main source of financial stability and is level-headed and seems to know exactly what to do or say

Purpose: To stay calm and collected during this tumultuous time so that their family can work on remaining whole right now

Intrigue

Ben: Ben learns his wife is keeping his daughter’s possible pregnancy a secret, he also discovers Jess’s estranged husband is secretly having sexual relations with Jess’s sister

Kristi: Although she has an excuse for everything, she is receiving expensive gifts from at least one client and is always running out at night to go to meetings with clients. It raises the question of whether or not she is cheating on Ben, and if this is a reaction to his cheating on her in the past.

Moral Issue

Ben: He discovers the flashlight used to kill Tom, wipes off the hair and blood, and hides it, afraid that if he turns it in, the police will assume he’s guilty of the murder

Kristi: Should she have kept Natalie’s possible pregnancy a secret from Ben? Especially knowing how secrets can rip families apart?

Unpredictable

Ben: After discovering his wife’s secret about Natalie, he forces his youngest daughter to tell him where her sister has gone. He then seeks out Natalie and gets into a fist fight with her boyfriend. This action turns up on social media, landing him in more hot water with the police. And then, based on circumstantial evidence he assumes his best friend took advantage of Natalie while she was drunk, and Ben throws him out of his home.

Kristi: She has fancy, newly-purchased sexy underwear in a bag on her bed. And she’s making Ben sleep on the couch. Hmmm.

Empathetic

Ben: His world is falling apart. First, his son is brutally murdered, then his wife discovers he cheated on her nine years ago, then he is harassed by random strangers and neighbors who have decided he is guilty in murdering Tom, then he is chased by reporters, trying to get a story out of him. The guy can’t catch a break. And when he finds the murder weapon and panics…we’re anxious for him, knowing he’s doing the wrong thing.

Kristi: She’s dealing with everything Ben’s dealing with because of his infidelity, and still tries to keep the family together. She acts strong, despite how hurt she feels about his secret betrayal. None of this is her fault, and yet she still has to push past reporters. She also has to deal with the relationship Jess and Ben still have, which might now be platonic, but is still there because of the mystery surrounding Tom’s death.

[Kimberly Gore]

Assignment 2:

What I learned from doing this assignment is: how to think ahead about who will be important in the storyline. I’m used to coming up with people as I sail along. This new structure encourages me to consider sub-plots early on.

Main Characters Circle:

ERIC HOWARD, 34, has his own psychiatric practice, grew up financially well off with little responsibility and is prone to making poor decisions, despite having good intentions.

NATALIE HOWARD, 27, has a yoga studio, hides an undesirable childhood background from the people in the affluent neighborhood where she now resides with husband Eric.

MARILYNN (LINNIE) HOWARD, 11, sweet and friendly, lives part-time with Eric and Natalie and part-time with Danielle, Eric’s first wife.

KRYSTAL NICHOLSON, 41, Natalie’s therapist, often works with Eric and Natalie together and knows all of their secrets, fears, and desires, and holds more control over them than they could possibly imagine.

Connected Circle:

Danielle Howard, 38, Eric’s first wife.

Jeff, Natalie’s drug-addicted brother.

Cheryl and Garret, next door neighbors and close friends.

Missy, one of the instructors at Nat’s yoga studio.

Craig Nicholson, Krystal’s 15-year-old son.

LaDonna, Natalie’s older friend and mentor, knows a lot about Natalie except for her “big secret.”

Matt, Eric’s friend and lawyer

Environment Circle:

Various people who attend yoga classes

Receptionist at Dr. Nicholson’s office

Various police

[Kimberly Gore]

Characters for sample show SECRETS AND LIES

A. Main Characters Circle: Ben Crawford, wife Kristi, Jess (Tom’s mom), Det. Andrea Cornell, Tom (in memory/story revolves around).

B. Connected Circle: daughters Abby and Natalie, brother Dave, Jess’s husband Scott, neighbors Kevin and Elaine, neighbors Vanessa and husband, neighbor woman with autistic son, friend acting as lawyer, Jess’s sister.

C. Environment Circle: jerky lawyer, promiscuous girl Dave brings home, Marino (policeman), Scott’s two kinda scary roommates, other neighbors and friends of Jess and Tom, various reporters.

[Kimberly Gore]

SECRETS AND LIES 5 Star Model

What I learned from this assignment is: For me, this 5-star model is a fresh way to think about plotting a screenplay. As a self-described “pantser,” I appreciate this soft delve into planning the story. It’s less intimidating for me. Like dipping a toe into a sea of plot points.

1) Big Picture Hooks: Viewers become armchair sleuths trying to find out who murdered a little boy, what really happened the night Kristi Crawford kicked husband Ben Crawford out of their house the night of the murder, and what does Detective Cornell know that she’s not sharing?

2) Amazing and Intriguing Character: Although we meet Ben Crawford immediately, the more interesting character is Andrea Cornell, the detective on the case. Andrea is cynical, persistent to the point of annoying, severely unfriendly, but exceptionally perceptive. Detective Cornell is not out to make friends, and we get the feeling there’s a very personal reason she’s chosen this profession.

Ben, although a much more sympathetic character, is mostly an emotional mess trying to squelch fires before they become raging infernos. But one thing that stands out: he is a good father, putting his kids’ needs before his own. Perhaps he’s a less stellar husband, however, since his moral compass points to infidelity.

3) Empathy/Distress: Our hero, Ben, has a lot going on. Right out of the gate (or in this case, the forest) he’s thrown into the horrifying situation of coming across a dead body. And not just any body, but the body of a neighbor’s young son. If that isn’t hard enough for our hapless guy, he’s having marital problems stemming from a secret that opens up like a winter rose throughout the pilot. And then he’s hounded by reporters galore while his family is harassed by distrustful peers. A house painter by profession, suspicion seeps through the town, and he soon finds himself without work. At the end of the pilot, although enough clues have been planted for us to have figured this out, we learn the murdered child is his own son, mothered by someone other than Ben’s wife of seventeen years. Whew! A lot to endure, poor guy.

4) Layers/Open Loops: Who killed Tom? Who wrote “Child Murderer” in red paint on Ben’s fence? Who was the mysterious motorcyclist stopped in front of his house at 3:42 a.m.? Why was he there? Where is the flashlight that was discovered near or at the crime scene, and did it belong to Ben, whose very similar flashlight is missing? Why does one of his neighbors dislike him so much? Why does Ben’s brother live on their premises? And, most importantly, why does Ben not remember what happened the night Tom was killed?

5) Inviting Obsession: Now that we know for certain that Ben is Tom’s father, we have a pressing need to know how the heck did he hide this for so long? Who else knows? And could that piece of vital information be the cause of Tom’s murder? Would Tom’s wife, assuming this was the exposed secret that tore up their marriage, be capable of killing a little kid?

I mean, let’s face it. Nothing is more shocking and horrific than a child’s death. Especially at the hands of what might possibly be a trusted adult. Who dunnits are classic suspense tactics, and this one involves an entire close-knit suburban neighborhood. Must. Know. More.

[Kimberly Gore]

Hi all!

My name is Kim, and I’m the author of four young adult novels, working on several more. As for scripts, I’ve completed seven screenplays (two, both cowritten with friends, were optioned but went nowhere) and three stage plays (one of which was produced on the college stage, the other two on the high school stage). To be honest, I’m hoping to write something that will sell to a mainstream market and I’m feeling optimistic that this class will give me the knowledge (and maybe even the confidence!) to do that. Even though I’ve written plays/screenplays, they aren’t at the high-concept/page-turning level they need to be in order to find an agent and producer. I’m starting a new job in a week or so, so this is going to be the perfect lesson on time management as well. One unique quality of mine is my ability to get people to spill their guts to me. I acquired this skill after being horribly bullied while growing up and realizing the world is a much better place when people take the time to listen to one another. And for me, it also conjures up characters and plots for my stories. 🙂 I look forward to writing and sharing with all of you.

[Kimberly Gore]

Kim Gore

I agree to the terms of this release form.

GROUP RELEASE FORM

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

[Kimberly Gore]

So cool, Stacy, we are both introducing reincarnation in our scripts! It will be interesting to compare our ways of using it. 🙂 I love the idea of a medium quitting her career because someone abused her power.

[Kimberly Gore]

YES! I just started a new job, so my brain is FRIED by the time I get to the lesson material. Just two teen boys and me at home, but somehow I have fifteen times the housework. How does that happen???

And yes, weekends are for dates with the boyfriend. But a big part of me craves (needs) these creative moments.

Keep up the awesome job! 🙂 TTYL

-Kim

[Kimberly Gore]

I agree with your sentiment about trying to decide who’s making the cut, haha! Since your main characters are related to one another, you have so many ways you can take this. I can see that their family loyalty would create a strong bond, and yet tempers could erupt and deteriorate that bond. This is going to get interesting, I can tell. 🙂

[Kimberly Gore]

Sounds so intriguing, Stacy! There are so many ways you could go with this, looking forward to knowing more. 🙂

[Kimberly Gore]

This definitely makes me want to tune in and watch Gossip Girl! 🙂

[Kimberly Gore]

Aw, thank you, Ahnee. I really appreciate that. I could have gone with GOSSIP GIRL, that would have been in my top three for sure.

[Kimberly Gore]

Hi Ahnee. I didn’t see a place for that anywhere, either.

[Kimberly Gore]

Hi Marie. So ironic, I’m an American but I have been in love with French culture since I was in high school (and took French as a language) and have dreamed of visiting France one day. And I love British movies and shows! Although I used Closed Captions because the accent can be tricky for me at times. I especially love British humor. So quick and quirky.

[Kimberly Gore]

Hi Bruce, I was just thinking last week about how cool it would be to have a job as a set designer for the movies. I’ve worked on theater sets back in my college days, but that is so much simpler and only has a teensy budget. I’d make bets you’re good with characters, since you had to understand the psychology of the people in order to design a set mirroring their tastes. 🙂

[Kimberly Gore]

Oh wow! Okay, I’m impressed with your “unique” story. Very cool.