[Leslie DuFresne]

Hello,

My name is Leslie DuFresne

I’ve written 2 feature scripts. Working on 3 projects/tv series.

I’m taking this class because I really need to learn how to write action pieces. I told Hal that I was so distracted with the amazing discount that I failed to realize this class was for writing a screenplay. I thought it was for a tv series. (I also took Hal’s Binge Worthy TV series, so tv writing is a bit on my brain) Hal says to apply it to my series, so that’s what I’ll be doing.

Something unique about me is my married name: DuFresne. Ring a bell? Sounds like DuFrane. Andy DuFresne? But it’s spelled DuFresne. Which is the correct way to spell it (it’s French) and also the way they spell it in Shawshank Redemption. My husband and I HAD TO name our 1st born son, Andy. Poor thing hated it for awhile, but now he embraces it. AND the movie.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Hello,

My name is Leslie DuFresne

I agree to the terms of this release form.

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Module 2, Lesson 1

I’m learning that the more these exercises challenge me, the more I learn about my series.

Concept:

A. An ambitious young woman skilled in surveillance…

B. …breaks through the gender barrier of the male dominated Chicago Outfit,

C. …rising through the ranks and sparking a change in the paradigm of criminal activity…

D. …as the dominant era of the mob comes to an end in the 80s and 90s.

World of the Show:

Unique Sub-World: The Outfit where everyone must earn or become expendable, money is power.

Previously unexplored: a woman turning a boys-only, male-dominated environment on its head

The Unknown: how hard it is to earn, especially as a woman

The Unseen: a secret government mole running an investigation. Feds are especially interested in flipping her to use her for her surveillance abilities.

Unheard of Dangers: Everyone is out for themselves, no one is safe

Reason to explore it: For power and money

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by  Leslie DuFresne.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by  Leslie DuFresne.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Leslie DuFresne has completed her BW Framework.

What I learned in doing this assignment is that I never would have come up with this kind of structure and in-depth dissection of my show had I not participated in this class. So grateful!

[Leslie DuFresne]

Lesson 11, Assignment 1

What I learned in doing this assignment is that I really enjoy working on irony more than anything. It’s always something I look for when I watch a show. I feel like it’s probably one of the most important elements in putting a show together.

Mr. Robot

Elliot longs for personal connection but hates to be touched.

Wellick walks into Fsociety headquarters. It’s an ironic visual of a corporate big wig entering the anarchists’ lair.

Angela works now for Evil Corp. She had brought a lawsuit against Evil Corp for causing the death of her mother, and now she is working for it.

Elliot, in helping Vera bust out of prison, releases all the prisoners in the jail. Elliot’s a vigilante who exposes criminals for their behavior, especially the coffee shop owner whom he helped put away in the beginning of the pilot.

Assignment 2

Jill will work for Charlie, while indirectly, even though she hates him and never saw herself working for him.

Jill believes it is Charlie who killed her parents but really it’s Jimmy – the person she is most intimate with and closest to.

Jimmy and Jill talk about getting out of the “life” early in the season. As the season goes on, it is Jill who would rather stay in the life than Jimmy- who was against it from the start.

Jill could end up an informer like her mother. Her mother was an informer against her ex. Jill is presented with the opportunity to inform on her ex as well- Jimmy.

No one would realize that Jimmy – while putting on a tough outer exterior – is his own worst enemy. He is hardest on himself due to his guilt and for not measuring up to his own expectations.

Jill is a feminist symbol in the series. She breaks the gender barrier and does things the guys do. Yet she loves a man that will not allow her to earn money for herself and the crew.

Nines teaches Jill how to surveil. Yet Jill uses what Nines teaches her to surveil him and turn him in.

For someone who wasn’t allowed to earn money, Jill ends up making more money than most of the guys, which impresses the bosses.

Jimmy and Charlie come to an agreement to end the war. Jimmy “sells” Jill to Charlie as part of the deal, to work for Charlie. Jill’s mother, as a prostitute was “sold” many times by her lover, Gio.

[Leslie DuFresne]

What I learned from doing this assignment: This assignment helped in many ways. There were elements I’ve been stuck on, but this exercise helped me answer some of the questions I had.

Mr. Robot

Plot Surface: Elliot is a computer tech who protects corporations at the cyber security firm he works at by day, but by night he takes on the dregs of society by hacking and upending their lives as he sees fit.

Major scheme revealed: Elliot joins Fsociety in their plan to erase the world’s debt.

Mystery: The mystery of the server at Ecorp, CS30. Gideon does not put the open server to rest in his mind. He establishes a honeypot which in turn piques Wellick’s interest. It leads him to Elliot and Fsociety being behind everything.

Major betrayal: Wellick expects to get the CTO job but feels betrayed when it goes to Scott Knowles, he then betrays Evil Corp by helping Fsociety with the hack. His wife also turns her back on him.

Major betrayal: Angela now works for Evil Corp. The company that took her mother’s life and the source of her father’s financial situation.

Character Surface: Elliot is a socially awkward, socially anxious, morphine-addicted computer tech, low on the totem pole of life.

Hidden character: Elliot is IN ACTUALITY – A REVOLUTIONARY, who founded Fsociety. It is ELLIOT’S plan to take down Evil Corp, not Mr. Robot’s.

Secret identity: Mr. Robot is a delusion of Elliot’s. Mr. Robot is really Elliot.

Wound: Elliot’s father died of a disease as a direct result of working for Evil Corp, his mother is an unsympathetic individual who has contributed to Elliot’s anxiety and disconnection in life.

Character intrigue: getting to the bottom of who White Rose is and the Dark Army.

Hidden relationship/Secret Identity: Darlene is Elliot’s sister.

Hidden relationship/Secret Identity: Darlene is in a relationship with Cisco who, at first appears to be only a random musician selling his CD on the street but is really a hacker representing the Dark Army.

Assignment 2

Plot Surface: Jill is a young woman who makes her living working for “connected” guys in the “Outfit”. She wants to improve her financial situation and is most interested in making money through juice loans. She knows that to do that, she needs Jimmy’s approval.

Major scheme revealed: Jimmy uses Jill to start a war with a rival crew member, Charlie, but knows that he will not get the approval from the top. He concocts a story that Jill is the initiator of the war, clearing himself of any wrongdoing.

Mystery: As Jimmy and Jill get romantically involved, is Jimmy really in love with Jill or is he just using her?

Hidden plan: Jimmy asks the boss for approval to go after Charlie, but it’s just a play. He knows that the answer will be no, and he goes through the motions of the sit down to ask permission to cover his tracks.

Hidden history: the deaths of Jill’s father and mother have never been solved. Most known theories point to Charlie, but it was Jimmy who killed them.

Character Surface: Jill is an angered but eager-to-impress collector who breaks the gender barrier of the Outfit.

Hidden agenda: Jill feels that working for the crew will get her close to Jimmy.

Conspiracy: Jimmy has thrown Jill under the bus about who initiated the war with Charlie. Jimmy has fed the bosses lies about her motivation.

Hidden character history: Jill’s father was not the same after suffering the trauma of his torture. Gio suffered from TBI and was making the crew vulnerable due to his symptoms. Jimmy was afraid Gio would also flip or turn Jimmy in to the feds after Jill’s mother had become an informant.

Wound: Jill’s memory of her father’s torture. Also, her memories of a mother that she could not be with most of her young life.

Wound: Jimmy’s having to kill Gio was not a heartless act. It lays heavily on his conscience having had to kill his mentor.

Competition: The competing crews headed by Jimmy and the antagonist Charlie.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by  Leslie DuFresne.

[Leslie DuFresne]

What I learned from this assignment was that a pilot is written with a series of questions that are answered later. This has always been a main draw to me when I watch many of the shows that are made today. I love the questions that arise and not knowing right away what the answers are. The intrigue feeds my obsession.

Big Picture Open Loops

Assignment 1

Mr. Robot

Will Elliot, Mr. Robot and Fsociety accomplish their goal to bring down Ecorp and change the economic status quo?

Will Elliot get a handle on his social anxiety and be drug free? Will he stop hacking people? Will Christa be able to help him?

Will Wellick report Elliot’s changing the dat file? Will Wellick be the CTO?

Will it be discovered that it was Elliot that left the E Corp server vulnerable to a hack by Fsociety? If so, what will be the consequences?

Who really is Mr. Robot, and why is he so driven to bring down the system?

Assignment 2

What is the traumatic event that keeps playing out in Jill’s mind?

What happened to Jill’s mother?

Will it be discovered that Nicky is a government mole working for the crew?

Will there be a war between Jimmy and Charlie?

Will Jimmy be boss of the Outfit?

Will Jimmy and his crew utilize Jill’s surveillance skills and her ability to “disappear”?

Will Jill and Jimmy fall for each other?

[Leslie DuFresne]

I learned that I still have a ways to go in thinking about my story and my characters. Yet having said that, I’m still coming up with something new every day thanks to these exercises.

Mr. Robot

Big Mysteries: Is everything Elliot experiences real or imagined? Is it all in his head – the hack, Fsociety? Who is Mr. Robot to Elliot? Will Elliot and Fsociety succeed in hacking Evil Corp? Will it change life as they know it?

Will the Dark Army hold up their end of the bargain to help Fsociety with the hack?

What is the motivation behind Tyrell and his wife’s scheming for the CTO job?

Small Mysteries: Who is WhiteRose?

Will Gideon learn more about the Evil Corps server, CS30? Will he learn that Elliot has removed the honeypot AllSafe has installed?

Why and how did Wellick and Mr. Robot get involved with each other? What did they plan together?

Will Angela be able to receive justice over her mother’s death?

Why has Elliot erased himself and Mr. Robot?

Assignment 2

Shocking Event Mystery:

Shocking event: Jill’s father’s abduction and torture

Secret: Charlie is behind the abduction/torture

Investigation: We see parts of the event in pieces, and much of it is unclear, we see more as the story goes on.

What – Jill’s father, Gio, is missing for days, no one knows of his whereabouts, Gio is then brought back to his wife and children, still alive, but just hanging on

When – roughly 20 years prior, when Jill is 5 years old

Where – at a banquet hall

Who – by Charlie and his crew

Why – Over something Gio did that Charlie has never forgotten, demonstrating Charlie’s psychosis.

Part Withheld: Angelo, Gio’s brother, is also behind the abduction of his brother

Over Time Mystery:

Cover up: Jimmy is against Jill being involved in the crew. He believes women “rat” easily and are not to be trusted. He believes that because Jill’s mom became an informant against Gio. Being around Jill is a constant reminder of what he did to her parents.

Secret: Jill is unaware that Jimmy killed both her mother and father on separate occasions, this is the real reason Jimmy is bothered by her working for him.

Reveals: Charlie knows the truth and tells Jill. Charlie is crazy, so it’s hard to believe him. She does her own investigation.

What – Jill was always let to believe that Charlie was behind her parents’ murders. Yet their deaths have always been shrouded in mystery.

Who – Jimmy killed both Gio and Natalia, not Charlie.

When – Jill was 12 years old when her father was killed. Her mother died within that year.

Why – After Gio’s abduction, he spiraled emotionally and mentally. He began screwing up on heists and jobs which made the crew vulnerable. Gio also took Jill away from Natalia, prompting Natalia to become an informant on Gio. Once Gio was indicted, there was risk he could turn his crew in, so Jimmy killed him. Jimmy then killed Natalia because her information implicated Gio.

How – They are both shot.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by  Leslie DuFresne.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Lesson 7, Assignment 1

I’m fascinated by the differences in intentional and unintentional conflict. I had never broken down conflict into two different compartments.

Mr. Robot

Empathy/Distress

Undeserved Misfortune: Elliot’s trauma as a child experiencing his father’s death at the hands of Evil Corp, and his relationship with his cold, abusive mother.

External Character Conflicts: Intentional – Elliot turns Vera in to the authorities. Unintentional – his decision to do that puts Shayla’s life in jeopardy with Vera.

Plot intruding on life: Fsociety loses the Dark Army’s China support which in turn wastes Elliot’s successful maneuvering in getting Steel Mountain primed for the hack.

Moral Dilemma: Elliot needs to hack Vera out of prison. If he does NOT, Shayla dies, and most likely Elliot could die as well. If Elliot DOES hack Vera out of prison, both he and Shayla could die anyway.

Forced Decision: Elliot DOES hack Vera out of prison. Elliot also blackmails Vera – a dangerous killer – to make sure Vera does not kill him and Shayla.

Assignment 2

Undeserved Misfortune: Jill had to witness part of her father’s torture. She had to grow up without her mother or father much of her childhood. Had to scrounge to make a living, her stepmother and brothers were poor after her father’s death. Sexually abused by her uncle during the time that he looks after her.

External Character Conflicts: Intentional – Jimmy doesn’t want her with the crew, he tests her to her breaking point. Unintentional – Jill’s being with the crew forces Jimmy to face his regrets of killing her father. It brings up unwanted emotions (which he takes out on Jill), especially the reminder of the war he lost over her father.

Plot intruding on Life: Everything is going well after Jelly sanctions her earning money on the street. However, everything falls apart when she learns that it was never sanctioned by Jimmy. Jimmy puts a stop to her earning and wants her away from the crew entirely.

Moral Dilemma: Does she turn in Ray “Nines” to Jimmy or not? If she does, he’s dead. If she doesn’t, her nemesis, Charlie, reaps benefits.

Forced Decision: She partakes in Nines’ death. Does nothing to stop it. If she doesn’t, she wouldn’t be proving her loyalty to Jimmy.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Lesson 6, Assignment 1

What I learned in doing this assignment is that there are so many layers to think of, I especially liked figuring out the common ground my characters have even if they are enemies.

Mr. Robot

ELLIOT

Mr. Robot

Surface: Partners in crime

Common Ground: Both want to change the status quo

Conflict: Elliot is an empath while Mr. Robot couldn’t care less whom he hurts. To him – the end justifies the means.

History: Not much history between them midway through the series. That will change as Elliot learns more about Mr. Robot.

Subtext: Elliot is very skeptical of Mr. Robot much of the time.

Arc: They start out adversarial but become partners in the fight to bring down economic injustice.

Angela

Surface: Co-workers at AllSafe

Common Ground: Friends since childhood

Conflict: Elliot makes her feel incompetent

History: Both of their parents died at the hands of Evil Corp

Subtext: Elliot loves Angela. Angela only sees him as a friend.

Arc: Angela begins to fight the injustice that brought about her mother’s death.

Shayla

Surface: Drug dealer/client

Common Ground: Broken individuals with very little connection to others in the world

Conflict: Elliot keeps breaking his promises he makes to her re: Vera and Morphine

History: Next door neighbors who become friends and she’s Elliot’s supplier.

Subtext: She knows when Elliot is lying, can read him easily.

Arc: Friends to lovers

Lesson 6, Assignment 2

JILL

Jimmy

Surface: Mentor/Mentee

Common Ground: They are the only ones in the crew who do not drink.

Conflict: He does not want her involved with the crew but realizes she’s an asset.

History: He was present when her father was tortured. He also started a war on his behalf.

Subtext: Romantic attraction

Arc: from mentor/mentee to lovers

Charlie “Rooster” Andriacchi

Surface: Rival crew members

Common Ground: take out aggression on others

Conflict: She wants revenge on him

History: Tortured her father and made a public display, whereas Jill and her family were cognizant of it.

Subtext: He can pick up her unease with him

Arc: Fears him/shuts down around him to warring against him.

Ray

Surface: Surveillance partners, mentor/mentee, ex-boyfriend

Common Ground: grew up in mob life, same neighborhood

Conflict: She doesn’t love him, she was the one who broke off the relationship.

History: Surveilled and collected from debtors together, he taught her what he knew, became romantically involved

Subtext: She has her suspicions about him, secretly uses his tools of surveillance to surveille him

Arc: Goes from being on friendly terms to reporting his deceptive activities to Jimmy.

[Leslie DuFresne]

What I learned in doing this assignment is – this is challenging stuff! But it’s extremely helpful, and I don’t think I would have delved into my characters to this degree had I gone at this alone.

Lesson 5, Assignment 1

Example Show: Mr. Robot

Elliot:

Situational-

Hope: To change the status quo

Fear: no purpose, insignificant

Motivation-

Want: to matter in the world

Need: to be loved

Base Emotion: Unlovable

Public mask: indifferent

Weakness: Socially awkward, social anxiety

Triggers: Disconnection, lack of purpose, witnessing injustice

Coping mechanism: alters his mental state with drugs

Mr. Robot:

Situational-

Hope: To bring down corporate America

Fear: That he will fail at his endeavor to correct economic injustice

Motivation-

Want: revenge

Needs: justice

Base emotion: Anger

Public mask: Revolutionary

Weakness: crazy, reckless

Triggers: not having control over situations or people

Coping Mechanisms: Manipulates, lashes out, threatens

Lesson 5, Assignment 2

Jill-

Situational- Hope: to make money through an illegal but familiar system. The legitimate world is not her world/ Fear: That her gender holds her back. Also that she will share a similar fate as her mother.

Motivation- Wants: Jimmy. Power. Revenge/ Needs: to heal, grieve, process her memories

Base Emotion: Anger, ambition/ Public Mask: Tough, competent

Weakness: her gender in the line of work she is in. Alcohol/chemical dependence.

Triggers: the Antagonist, her memories

Coping Mechanism: Cocaine, sex, physical aggression

Jimmy-

Situational- Hope: to be boss at the very top/ Fear: That he won’t succeed, he’ll be framed, indicted, imprisoned

Motivation- Wants: security, to not have to look over his shoulder/Needs: to get out of the life.

Base Emotion: Impatience and disappointment with himself that he isn’t further up the ladder by now/ Public Mask: leader with power and ambition

Weakness: He’s his own worst enemy

Triggers: the Antagonist, his crew members and their mistakes

Coping Mechanism: uses people to get what he wants, threatens, blackmails, uses aggression

• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Leslie DuFresne.

[Leslie DuFresne]

I learned that I really need to think more deeply about these characters and what makes them intriguing.

Jill

Role: collects money for her boss who is a low-level Outfit associate. Very skilled at surveillance.

Hidden agenda: to avenge her father

Competition: she and low level associates compete to earn money for the crew

Conspiracy: She conspires with her mentor, Jimmy, to avenge her father and to help him move up the ladder to a higher position.

Secrets: Jimmy is the love of her life. Always has been. A fact that needs to be kept under wraps.

Deception: Jill puts money out on the street with juice loans, something that has not been approved by Jimmy. She figures that her boss, who has fronted her the cash, will be in the line of fire if it’s discovered.

Wound: a memory of her father and how he suffered at the hands of the antagonist

Secret identity: her working for the outfit is an identity to keep secret at all times in the real world.

Jimmy

Role: Captain of the crew

Hidden agenda: Ambitious. Wants to overthrow the top tier of the Outfit.

Competition: Finds himself competing with a rival Captain of another crew – our Antagonist. They have history.

Conspiracy: Conspires with Jill to avenge her father by starting a war with the Antagonist.

Secrets: He is the one starting the war, however it is Jill that has offered to take the blame for it to cover Jimmy.

Deception: Deceives the bosses at the top by starting the war.

Wound: he hasn’t forgiven himself for having killed his mentor in his early years with the Outfit.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Leslie DuFresne.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Leslie DuFresne.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Lesson 4, Assignment 1

What I learned from this assignment is how important developing intrigue in characters is and the many facets to it.

Example Show: Mr. Robot

Competition: Elliot and Ollie over Angela. It’s not a direct competition but Elliot has feelings for Angela and he resents Ollie.

Conspiracy: In Ep. 4, Elliot and Fsociety plan to hack into Steel Mountain’s climate control system.

Secrets: Elliot has feelings for Angela.

Deception: Elliot tries to hide his Morphine addiction, but his withdrawals are so bad, Fsociety has to put their plans on hold and help Elliot with his detox.

Wound: Towards the end of his detox, Elliot expresses how alone he feels. He believes that the group has left him, but Mr. Robot is there.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Lesson 3, Assignment 2

What I learned in doing this assignment: I learned that all the points in the Character model are of equal value and each point needs to be clearly fleshed out for both characters to sell the show.

The Journey of the Show:

Jill’s involvement with the Outfit sparks a change in the paradigm of criminal activity in the city of Chicago. Her actions in the west side crew set in motion a war that Jimmy has longed to see happen to shift the seats of power above him. He initially fights the idea of her involvement. However, her expertise in surveillance is an asset to the crew and to Jimmy directly in regards to his ambitions of climbing the criminal ladder.

The main characters that sell the show are Jill DiVarco and Jimmy Losito.

Jill’s Role in the show: 20-something year old who breaks the gender barrier of the Outfit.

Jimmy’s Role in the show: Jill’s mentor and love interest.

Jill – Unique Purpose / Expertise: Jill is extremely skilled in surveillance. She is very good at not being detected. Being a woman, not many people expect a female to sit on stake outs. It’s one of the reasons why she is not detected. She also is physically capable of providing “muscle” for the Outfit, if she has to use physical force, she can hold her own with the guys.

Jimmy – Unique purpose/expertise is he is an extremely good earner for the Outfit. He is widely respected.

Jill – Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface? Jill holds a memory that has scarred her for life. She is haunted by it, and it’s what propels her to avenge her father.

Jimmy – Intrigue: Jimmy has many skeletons in his closet. Events haunt him including the one that he shares with Jill. He was present at the event that traumatized her years ago. He also wants to move up in the organization but at the same time, longs for a time when he can be free of it. However, he knows the chances of that are slim.

Jill – Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? Jill extorts people for money. Steals cars. Surveilles people. Kills someone.

Jimmy – Moral issue: Jimmy hurts people that cross him. Extorts and bribes people, kills a person. He is involved in the skimming of casinos in Las Vegas.

Jill – Unpredictable: What will they do next? Jill surprisingly kills someone. It’s the first time she has taken a life, and it’s highly unexpected. She sleeps with her ex when prior to this she has made it clear that that is completely off the table.

Jimmy – Unpredictable: Jimmy attacks someone violently when having displayed the utmost decorum beforehand.

Jill – Empathetic: Why do we care? Jill and the women (who work hard for the men in the crew) resort to their gender specific duties. Jill sees the men making money, and we understand her wanting to make her own money and do well. We sympathize with her anxiety after she learns someone close to her is talking to the feds. We see Jill struggle with her dying mother and how that affects her. It’s alluded that her uncle has abused her sexually.

Jimmy – Empathetic: We sympathize with Jimmy when he has a sit down with Ernie Scalise. Ernie is completely unreasonable and out of control. Jimmy is reasonable, fair and of a much saner mind.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Leslie DuFresne.

[Leslie DuFresne]

As I did this assignment, I learned that there are so many tools to incorporate when creating engaging characters.

Assignment 1

Example show: Mr. Robot

The main character in the show is Elliot Alderson.

His role in the show: A 20-something, cyber security system tech who becomes the driving force behind the destruction of a corporate giant.

Unique Purpose/Expertise: Elliot is a genius computer tech with a penchant to right the wrongs of society/change the status quo.

Intrigue: What secret is beneath the surface? Elliot is a living, breathing vault of secrets: He doesn’t tell the truth to his therapist. He’s hacked all the people in his life to get to know them- his therapist, Angela, Shayla, Ollie, etc… He didn’t delete the virus attack by Fsociety, he has it locked away in his files. He keeps hidden files on all the low characters he has hacked.

Moral issue: Elliot agrees to a series of drug tests for his therapist but plans on hacking into the hospital files to alter the results to hide his ongoing drug abuse. At the end of episode 3, he joins the Fsociety again to begin another major hack.

Unpredictable: We really don’t know what Elliot is going to do. There’s a tug of war going on in his mind and he can choose to go one way or the other in regards to aligning with Fsociety.

Empathetic: We hear the struggle in Elliot’s mind throughout the show, so we understand where he’s coming from. We also learn more about his father’s death in Episode 3 and we sympathize with Elliot over such a great loss. His mother even seems very dismissive about his dad’s death which makes matters worse for Elliot emotionally.

[Leslie DuFresne]

What I learned in doing this assignment was to flesh out characters that needed more development.

Main characters circle:

1. Jill DiVarco – Late 20s, grew up in the mob world. She’s a collector for the Outfit who sees her male counterparts making money hand over fist and she wants a piece of that. She has anger issues and having a collection job helps her physically relieve some of those issues. These are issues that stem from childhood and events that led to her father’s murder at that time.

2. Jimmy Losito – early 40s, well established street boss/Caporegime of his crew. Has worked hard to get where he’s at. He’s one of the more successful crew leaders and knows that jealous eyes amongst the various crews target him. He is on a mission to be head boss of the entire Outfit.

3. Ernest “Ernie” Scalise – 60s, sadistic and maniacal rival crew leader of Jimmy’s. He’s the villain in the story. Though a brutal, barbaric leader, the Outfit bosses tolerate him because he’s a good earner. He and Jimmy have history so he is Jimmy’s #1 threat. He also is the main culprit in Jill’s father’s murder, so she seeks vengeance upon him even as he strikes fear in her heart.

4. Nicky Palladino/Nick DeFazio – 30s, low level mob associate. He’s an obnoxious and irritating crew member, but it’s a cover – he’s a government mole unbeknownst to anyone in the Outfit.

Connected circle:

1. Ray Napoli – Late 20s, low level mob associate and ex-boyfriend to Jill. He’s a collector like Jill, but also a degenerate gambler. He owes the mob a considerable amount of money. He’s jumpy character because he believes he’s in the crew’s crosshairs due to his debts. Secretly he does side deals with Ernest… to help his financial situation.

2. Giovanni “Gio” DiVarco – 30s, Tough but loving father to Jill and his two sons. Made member who’s attempted murder by Ernie Scalise sparks a war between crews.

3. Marion DiVarco – 30s/50s, reserved, anxious wife to Gio and stepmother to Jill. She’s bitter after the death of her husband and helpless to keep her two sons out of the life. She has a strained relationship with Jill.

4. Natalia Wojcik – 30s/50s – mother to Jill, hooker, girlfriend to Gio DiVarco.

5. Angelo “Jelly” DiVarco – Gio’s brother and uncle to Jill and her stepbrothers. Also her boss at the bar he owns and she works at. He’s a slimy character who cuts corners and never gives a straight answer. He’s also very “handsy” with the women that work for him, including with his own niece, Jill. He’s not a made member due to his sleazy character and cheap ways with money.

6. Gerald Amato – 40s, Jimmy driver and right hand man. He and Jimmy go way back to their beginnings in the Outfit. Jealous of Jimmy’s favoring of Jill over him in certain situations. Skeptical of Jill’s intentions and her loyalty to the crew.

7. Pasquale DiVarco – early 30s, Jill’s older half-brother. Mob associate who has a hard time earning for the crew.

8. Salvatore “Salvie” DiVarco – early 30s, Jill’s older half-brother. Mob associate but doesn’t have much of a heart for the life. Tries to forge a life in a legitimate line of work but thanks to his association with the Outfit, it’s next to impossible.

Environment Circle: Mob members and associates, Police, FBI agents, attorneys, judges, District attorneys, States attorneys, U.S. attorneys, barmaids, bar patrons, prostitutes, airport workers, Union officials.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Leslie DuFresne.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Lesson 2 Assignment 1

Example Show: Mr. Robot

Main character circle: Elliot Alderson, Mr. Robot

Connected circle: Tyrell Wellick, Angela, Shayla, Darlene, Krista, Gideon, Ollie

Environment circle: Hackers, Allsafe employees, E Corp employees, lawyers, men in black

[Leslie DuFresne]

Mr. Robot 5 Star Points Model

I think the biggest thing I learned in doing this assignment and what makes Mr. Robot bingeworthy is something I noticed in the teaser at the start of the show. When Elliot confronts the Coffee bar owner on how Elliot has hacked him and will be turning him into authorities, Elliot offers information about himself. It’s not a simple one dimensional-catch-the-bad-guy scene. It goes much deeper than that. We learn things about our main character right away, but not all at once. It provides a multi-layered scene in place of one that could have easily been one dimensional.

Big Picture Hooks

Ask this: What is the big hook of this show?

A socially challenged computer tech, Elliot Alderson, leads – what he feels is – a purposeless and disconnected life. He finds meaning when Mr. Robot entices him to help take down a conglomerate. Only problem is, is this real or imagined?

Amazing and Intriguing Character

Ask this: What makes these main characters intriguing and interesting?

Elliot is a cyber security engineer which doesn’t sound all that interesting. But what makes him intriguing is that he is a hacker that targets the dregs of society who foster injustice in the world. Elliot wants to right every wrong. It’s his dream to change the status quo.

Empathy / Distress

Ask this: What situation causes us to feel both empathy and distress for this character?

We see that Elliot experiences social anxiety. When his loneliness becomes overwhelming, he undergoes bouts of crying. We learn that he is not in contact with any family, and we see a flashback of an abusive mother. He feels like just a number in life, – anonymous, and he has such a strong desire for a purpose which is very relatable. He doesn’t like to be touched, but he longs for human connection and to be normal.

Layers / Open Loops

Ask this: What questions are created by this first episode that can only be answered by watching the entire season?

Why and how was Elliot “forced”, as he says, into going to therapy? Is FSociety a delusion? Is Elliot going to overdose on Morphine as some point? (They set up his need for Suboxone to counter the withdrawal.) Where will his relationship with Angela go? Will the world’s debt be eliminated? Does E Corp and Tyrell Wellick know that Elliot helped to frame Terry Colby?

Inviting Obsession

Ask this: How does this pilot create the need to see every single episode?

There are countless set ups throughout the pilot that need to be paid off and those questions play in the back of our minds as we watch the final scene. And it is not what we expect: Tyrell Wellick greeting Elliot at E corp. What will happen next?

[Leslie DuFresne]

1. Name: Leslie DuFresne

2. I’ve written 2 feature scripts.

3. I hope to learn the art of tv series writing of the serial persuasion. My background is feature screenplays, so I’m hoping to learn the craft and this class seemed like a great avenue to explore that.

4. I always have ideas for projects floating around my head. The most I usually do is jot all my notes down, but actually carving out outlines/writing has been hard. I’ve got kids, and I’m always finding excuses not to write. I think this class will help me in the productivity department. I have a high concept idea for my tv series and all the elements of this class will help me organize and write it.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Leslie DuFresne.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by  Leslie DuFresne.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Leslie DuFresne

I agree to the terms of this release form.

GROUP RELEASE FORM

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

This completes the Group Release Form for the class.

[Leslie DuFresne]

Anyone know where the Module 2 Forums are located?

[Leslie DuFresne]

Hi Kim! I’m so happy you asked this question. I can’t find it either!