[Marcus Armstrong]

LESSON 1

What I learned today is the best way to overcome procrastination is to take the first step.

GENRE: Comedy

TITLE: Finance Isn’t Funny Business

CONCEPT/LOGLINE: Quick-witted hospital CFO can't help himself and will disrupt any meeting with a well-timed joke.

MAIN CHARACTERS:

Character 1 – The “Straight Guy”
Name: Dr. Lena Morales
Role: Chief of Medicine, the voice of reason
Personality Traits: Grounded, empathetic, dry sense of humor, endlessly patient
What Makes Them Funny: Her deadpan reactions and exasperated sighs as the CFO’s jokes derail critical meetings. She’s constantly cleaning up the absurd messes while trying to maintain professional dignity.

Character 2 – The Quirky Character
Name: Teddy “Specs” Rankin
Role: Neurotic Billing Supervisor
Personality Traits: Obsessive-compulsive, hyper-organized, flustered under pressure
What Makes Them Funny: When the CFO cracks a joke, Teddy overanalyzes it like a legal document, spiraling into frantic, hilarious tangents about compliance and paperwork.

Character 3 – The Over-the-Top Character
Name: Nurse Darla Blitz
Role: Veteran ER nurse with a flair for drama
Personality Traits: Boisterous, theatrical, fond of gossip, always exaggerating
What Makes Them Funny: She treats every minor event—like a paper jam or spilled coffee—as a life-or-death crisis and narrates it to anyone within earshot in operatic detail.

Character 4 – The Conflict Character
Name: Victor Hale
Role: Ruthless Hospital Board Chairman
Personality Traits: Serious, ambitious, humorless, hates inefficiency
What Makes Them Funny: His constant attempts to impose order only make the chaos worse. His volcanic temper and icy glares at the CFO are a running gag, especially when he’s forced into humiliating slapstick situations.

Character 5 – The Agent of Chaos
Name: Penny Voss
Role: Overenthusiastic HR Director
Personality Traits: Naively optimistic, meddlesome, eager to “team-build”
What Makes Them Funny: She plans elaborate staff bonding exercises that backfire spectacularly—like improv workshops and karaoke contests—unleashing havoc just when things start to calm down.

Character 6 – The CFO
Name: Max Halloway
Role: Hospital CFO and perpetual jester
Personality Traits: Brilliant with numbers, irrepressibly sarcastic, disarmingly charming, self-sabotaging
What Makes Them Funny: Max can’t resist dropping perfectly timed quips—even during crises—derailing meetings, infuriating Victor Hale, and confusing the staff. His humor is both his superpower and his downfall, as he often jokes himself right into deeper trouble. He’s convinced a laugh can fix anything, but it usually makes everything worse.

SHORT SYNOPSIS: Every meeting meant to fix the hospital ends in comic disaster as the CFO’s untimely punchlines trigger a chain of hilarious misunderstandings.

WHAT MAKES THIS MOVIE OR SHOW FUNNY? As if healthcare finance wasn’t difficult enough in today’s world, every chance for this hospital to thrive to serve the community is thwarted by this joke-obsessed CFO.

• This reply was modified 2 weeks, 4 days ago by  Marcus Armstrong. Reason: spacing wasn't right

[Marcus Armstrong]

Hello, I’m Marc Armstrong from Las Vegas. I’ve started three scripts, all incomplete. My goal is to actually take this comedic script through to the end. We all come from different backgrounds with different experiences, so all of us are unique, but one entertainment-related unique fact about me is that I graduated high school in Springfield, MO, in the same class as Brad Pitt (which has not done a darn thing for me).

[Marcus Armstrong]

I, Marc Armstrong, agree to the terms of this release form.

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.

• This reply was modified 3 weeks, 4 days ago by  Marcus Armstrong.
• This reply was modified 3 weeks, 4 days ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong

GROUP RELEASE FORM

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea. I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Marcus Armstrong. Reason: Formatting was lost upon copying and pasting

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc’s Credibility is Going Up!

What I learned doing this assignment is that I have virtually no credibility, currently, but I know that developing this is completely within my control.

Steps to increase my credibility in the next 30 days:

• Begin to develop a writing sample.
• Enroll in a SU Genre Course (enrolled in “Comedy Writing for Screenplays” just last night)

Credibility Checklist

1. My Writing Sample:

• “Recommend” from Coverage: Not yet
• Delivers on the genre in a strong way: Not yet
• Delivers on the business decisions: Not yet

2. Screenwriting Accomplishments:

• Contest wins: None yet
• Smaller deals (options, sales, writing assignments): None yet
• Larger deals: None yet
• Movies produced: None yet

3. The Google factor:

• Nothing appears – yet 🙂

4. My Network:

• How many producers are in my network? None yet
• How many Connections do I have who are connected to producers? None yet

5. Education specific to screenwriting:

• ScreenwritingU Courses – BWTV, WIM

6. Borrowed Credibility

• Represented by an agent or manager: Not yet
• Working with a producer: Not yet
• Connected to a star: Graduated high school with Brad Pitt (not sure how much this will help given at this point)
• Connected to a funding source: Not yet

7. IMDB CREDITS

• What credits show up there for me? Nada!

8. Other forms of credibility that is related to screenwriting:

• Novels published: None
• Producer or director experience: None
• Experience working with agencies, production companies, film festivals, etc: None

Possible things I can do to increase my credibility in the future:

• Finish my WIM project and develop a Writing Sample
• Enter a writing contest
• Create a second LinkedIn account and profile exclusive to writing.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 4 months ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong’s Projects and Insights

Project:

EVERYONE’S A COMEDIAN – A comedy about a conservative accountant, bound by routine, who suffers an accident that leads to emotional amnesia. Unable to remember how he is “supposed” to feel about anything from his past, he enjoys new food, tries new hobbies and decides to pursue stand-up comedy, much to the horror of his wife and kids ($5 – $15 million).

No Finished Script

I learned from the opening teleconference that the first writing assignment is more about the opportunity and less about the compensation and that my focus should be on helping the producer move the project forward.

[Marcus Armstrong]

My name is Marc Armstrong and I have completed no scripts. I partially completed my BingeWorthy TV pilot and partially completed my Writing Incredible Movies script. I am just a sucker for spending money, especially on education and, like a fish repeatedly going after the same lure, I keep signing up for these courses as they come into my Inbox (so if you sell solar panels door-to-door or Girl Scout cookies, please do not come near me). I do hope to learn more about the process of making a screenplay interesting to producers and how to better interact with them. Thanks for letting me introduce myself.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong

I agree to the terms of this release form.

GROUP RELEASE FORM

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

This completes the Group Release Form for the class.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 4 months ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Likability/Relatability/Empathy

MY VISION: I am so disciplined in the daily writing process and becoming such an adept writer that my successful screenplays are launching me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is how to make the audience connect with my lead characters.

Edmund (protagonist)

Likability

• Edmund has always loved animals.

• Edmund treats his college girlfriend Isabella with the utmost respect.

Relatability

• After graduation, his heart is broken as he and Isabella take different paths.

• He has low self-esteem due to being bullied in school so he doesn’t stick up for himself.

Empathy

• As a young boy, Edmund feels helpless as he watches his father drown a bag of kittens.

• He feels helpless as he witnesses baby seals being killed by poachers.

Raymond (antagonist)

Likability

• Raymond is beloved by everyone at social gatherings.

• He rescues a dog which has fallen into an aqueduct and can’t get out on its own.

Relatability

• He and Isabella have one financial challenge after another due to no fault of their own.

• He always had to work harder than his peers to achieve success.

Empathy

• After finally meeting the criteria for a promotion, the agency announces a hiring and promotional freeze.

• In a vulnerable and emotional moment, he confesses to Isabella that he never felt loved by his parents.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Character Intrigue

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is the character development isn’t difficult once I commit to actually sitting at the keyboard to allow the ideas to generate.

Ivory Coast

Character Name: Edmund

Subtext Identity: An environmentalist who was wounded from being bullied as a child.

Subtext Trait: Secretive, vengeful.

Subtext Logline: Edmund is an environmentalist who was bullied as a child and is now secretly out for revenge against animal poachers.

Possible Areas of Subtext: Lives a double life as nobody knows he is avenging the deaths of poached animals. He is intent on standing up for the helpless.

Character Name: Raymond

Subtext Identity: A U.S. Marshal tasked with tracking down the killer of animal poachers (Edmund), but is secretly involved in illegal poaching.

Subtext Trait: Unethical, dirty agent

Subtext Logline: Raymond is a U.S. Marshal tasked with tracking down the killer of animal poachers, but is an unethical, dirty agent and is secretly involved in the illegal poaching.

Possible Areas of Subtext: Pretends to uphold the law, but his motive for capturing Edmund is actually due to his own financial gain from poaching. Beloved by neighbors and fellow agents, but is dirty.

Character Name: Isabella

Subtext Identity: Zookeeper married to Raymond, but used to date Edmund while in college.

Subtext Trait: Secretly in love with the vigilante.

Subtext Logline: Isabella is a zookeeper who is married to the U.S. Marshal charged with tracking her ex-boyfriend, who she still loves.

Possible Areas of Subtext: On the surface she pretends to love and support her husband, but is sabotaging his efforts to catch the vigilante. She is plotting her escape to be with Raymond.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Subtext Characters

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is the importance of subtext in making an interesting movie. Without subtext, a story is just a sequence of events on the surface and is boring. Subtext adds the qualities that can make a movie irresistible to audiences.

Example Movie

Movie Title: Taken

Character name: Bryan Mills

Subtext Identity: Former CIA operative who is always on edge and on alert for deviant behavior.

Subtext Trait: Suspicious, crafty

Subtext Logline: Bryan is a former CIA operative who is always on alert and suspicious of others and who must rely on his acquired skills to save his daughter.

Possible Areas of Subtext: Over-analyzing everything. Resists his daughter’s wish to travel Europe with a girlfriend. Always anticipating deviant behavior and prepared with countermeasures.

Ivory Coast

Character Name: Edmund

Subtext Identity: An environmentalist who was wounded from being bullied as a child.

Subtext Trait: Secretive, vengeful.

Subtext Logline: Edmund is an environmentalist who was bullied as a child and is now secretly out for revenge against animal poachers.

Possible Areas of Subtext: Lives a double life as nobody knows he is avenging the deaths of poached animals. He is intent on standing up for the helpless.

Character Name: Raymond

Subtext Identity: A U.S. Marshal tasked with tracking down the killer of animal poachers (Edmund), but is secretly involved in illegal poaching.

Subtext Trait: Unethical, dirty agent

Subtext Logline: Raymond is a U.S. Marshal tasked with tracking down the killer of animal poachers, but is an unethical, dirty agent and is secretly involved in the illegal poaching.

Possible Areas of Subtext: Pretends to uphold the law, but his motive for capturing Edmund is actually due to his own financial gain from poaching. Beloved by neighbors and fellow agents, but is dirty.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Actor Attractors!

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is the Actor Attractors provide a framework to developing characters that have a better chance of drawing bigger actors. Still far behind, this draft is very rough and needs a lot of work.

Lead Character Name: Edmund

Role: Protagonist

1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role?

An underdog who never stood up to his abusive father and other childhood bullies transforms into a killing machine to avenge the senseless deaths of poached animals.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the story?

Almost incapable of standing up for himself, he overcompensates by not only standing up for poached animals, but killing the poachers in the same way they killed the animals.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead could take in this script?

Tracking and hunting humans while eluding the pursuit of a U.S. Marshal agent. Clubbing seal poachers to death, killing elephant poachers by piercing them and extracting their teeth until they ultimately die.

4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor?

He is shown in a river holding another man underwater, but is overcome with compassion

and lets the man up just before he drowns. At the same time, he turns to see another man aiming a gun at him. As we pan back to the man in the river, a gunshot rings out, but we do not know the outcome. The scene abruptly changes to a flashback of him as a boy next to a river feeling helpless as his father drown a bag of unwanted kittens.

5. What is this character’s emotional range?

Sadness and intense rage over the animal poaching. Love for his former girlfriend, Isabella.

6. What subtext can the actor play?

A bit of a shy demeanor, he completely masks his intense rage over needless animal killing. While almost acting powerless and avoidant, he inwardly has a calculated plan to exact revenge.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has?

The wife of the U.S. Marshal agent who is tracking him is actually his former zoology classmate and girlfriend. He is still deeply in love with her.

8. How is this character’s unique voice presented?

Rather soft-spoken, his rage is more calculated that wild. He comes across more like a silent assassin.

9. What makes this character special and unique?

He overcomes a childhood of abuse by his father and being bullied, maintains his love for Isabella, yet is passionate about his mission to avenge the deaths of poached animals.

Lead Character Name: Raymond

Role: Antagonist

1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role?

An arrogant, hotshot U.S. Marshal, who thinks he is above the law and believes he will always win.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the story?

Although he has the persona of being invincible, he is inwardly insecure, mistreats his wife and is actually taking bribes by the animal hunters to look the other way.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead could take in this script?

Recklessly pursing Edmund even to the point of being out of control.

4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor?

A handsome, popular, capable U.S. Marshal is shown capturing the head of a dangerous cartel. At first, it appears he may be the hero of the story.

5. What is this character’s emotional range?

Romantic yet angry, confident yet insecure.

6. What subtext can the actor play?

Although working to uphold the law, he hides the fact that he is taking bribes. He is also a charmer who disguises that he is verbally and somewhat physically abusive to his wife.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has?

He controls his wife, yet has all her friends believing he is the ultimate husband. He grows to despise Edmund, not so much for his mercy killing, but because of his relationship with his wife and because Edmund’s activity is threatening his bribe income.

8. How is this character’s unique voice presented?

Overbearing, falsely charismatic, overly charming.

9. What makes this character special and unique?

He is duplicitous and is the exact opposite of the person he portrays.

Lead Character Name: Isabella

Role: Triangle Character

1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role?

Abused wife of Raymond, U.S. Marshal, and former girlfriend of protagonist Edmund. She is cunning and brilliant and works out a plan to leave Raymond for Edmund.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the story?

She understands Edmund’s fragile psyche caused by teenage abuse. She is the only one to instill in him confidence. She wants to help him, but has to figure out how to leave Raymond and not get killed.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead could take in this script?

She appears supportive and loyal to her abusive husband, but carries on an affair with Edmund.

4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor?

Isabella is one of the first people Edmund meets at Stanford as they are both zoology freshmen. They become fast friends, study partners and eventually lovers. She always protects Edmund’s fragile psyche.

5. What is this character’s emotional range?

Fear when Raymond abuses her, but love for Edmund.

6. What subtext can the actor play?

She appears loyal to Raymond as she carries on a secret affair with Edmund and even sabotages Raymond’s efforts to capture Edmund.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has?

A broken relationship with her abusive husband and an eternal bond with Edmund.

8. How is this character’s unique voice presented?

Passive when around Raymond, but passionate around Edmund.

9. What makes this character special and unique?

Like her husband, she is duplicitous and appeases him, but secretly develops a plan to escape with Edmund.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Actor Attractors for Taken

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is that watching a movie for not only entertainment, but also with the intent to identify reasons actors would find the role attractive is very beneficial for learning. Breaking down the lead actor attributes for Taken will help me build in such actor attractors in my own project.

Movie Title: Taken

Lead Character Name: Bryan Mills

1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role?

An ex-CIA agent, now a bit of an underdog, is forced to apply his special skills to save his daughter.

2. What makes this character the most interesting character in the movie?

Now divorced, rarely sees his daughter, the most important person in the world to him, is now working odd jobs in security. When his daughter is kidnapped by an Albanian sex trafficking ring, he gets to apply his special CIA skills to rescue her.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead takes in the movie?

Makes a bold statement to the kidnapper that he will find and kill him. Calmly coaches his daughter on what to do and say before she is kidnapped. Infiltrates the armed Albanian gang and takes them all out, including the lead kidnapper. Car chase to beat a yacht to a bridge to jump on board and save his daughter.

4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor?

Down on his luck, divorced, alone, missing his daughter. Takes a routine security job to escort a young pop singer to and from a concert and helps foil an attack and takes her to safety.

5. What is this character’s emotional range?

Sadness over being estranged from his daughter to elated when he gets to see her. Calculated, especially with potential danger. Intense rage when is daughter is kidnapped.

6. What subtext can the actor play?

While appeasing his controlling ex-wife and going along with her poor decision to allow their daughter to go to Paris, he always attempts to mitigate risk. He expresses focused determination throughout his pursuit of his kidnapped daughter.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has?

He loves and dotes on his daughter, who is the most important person in his life. He tolerates his ex-wife even when she demeans him and is polite to her new husband. He tortures the main antagonist, the Albanian kidnapper and once he gets the information he needs, although he could release him, he kills him as he promised he would.

8. How is this character’s unique voice presented?

The cold manner in which he threatened to track down and kill the kidnapper when talking to him on the phone. The way he coached his daughter when her kidnapping was imminent. The way he tortured the kidnapper.

9. What makes this character special and unique?

Although he is likely panicking inside, he remains poised, determined and extremely focused when rescuing his daughter.

10. (Fill in a scene that shows the character fulfilling much of the Actor Attractor model.)

The scene in which he poses as the French police officer and enters the Albanian gang’s house to presumably raise the rate for protection, interrogates them until he finds the leader, takes out the entire gang and tortures the leader to get key information before killing him.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Genre Conventions

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is that my concept and 4-Act structure appears to be more Drama and less Action. I decided to move a key action scene to the beginning in a flash forward, but leaving it vague enough to keep the audience guessing. This is still far from where I need it to be and there are so many potential plot holes, but I am now so far behind that I am just turning it is as-is with the hopes of improving it in future lessons.

• Title: Ivory Coast

• Concept: An environmentalist kills poachers using the same means as they killed their game.

• Genre: Action

List of Conventions for Action Genre:

• Purpose: Adrenaline-stirring / fast paced

• Demand for Action: Normal legal channels prove futile leading the protagonist to take the law into his own hands.

• Mission: The hero must overcome his passive demeanor and serve up retribution for the defenseless animals, despite being pursued by the U.S. Marshal.

• Escalating Action: Initially overcome by his fears, the Hero’s cause drives him to pursue revenge, but the stakes keep escalating with the pursuit of the U.S. Marshal agent.

• Hero: Edmund, initially incapable, but overcomes his fears.

• Antagonist: Raymond, U.S. Marshal

Lesson 5 Structure (with Improvements)

Act 1:

• Opening: Edmund is waste deep in a river holding another man (his father) underwater, presumably attempting to drown him. Just before it appears he will kill the man, he has a change of heart and pulls him to the surface. Simultaneously, he turns to see a U.S. Marshal agent on the riverbank pointing a gun at him. A gunshot rings out.

Switch to young Edmund in a seemingly poor family with a domineering and abusive father and a mother who can’t protect herself or her children.

• Inciting Incident: After suffering another beating from his father, Edmund witnesses his father drowning a litter of kittens just because they were inconvenient.

• Turning Point: Edmund vows to study Zoology and use his education as a platform to protect animals from monsters like his father.

Act 2:

• New plan: Edmund has graduated and now works as a zookeeper. The increasing incidence of ivory poachers and baby seal killings has him outraged.

• Plan in action: Through extensive research, networking and a series of trials, Edmund finally scores a meeting with the National Wildlife Federation to encourage them to go after poachers.

• Midpoint Turning Point: Edmund learns that the National Wildlife Federation actually turns their back on poachers in exchange for their financial contributions to the agency.

Act 3:

• Rethink everything: Edmund suddenly realizes that money controls everything and no agency will take on this battle.

• New plan: Edmund decides to defend the animals by retaliating against the poachers in the same manner they were killed, but he must first overcome his fear of conflict and violence. After an initial retaliation, he finds it easier to repeat the act.

• Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift: After several mercy killings, Edmund is nearly caught by Raymond, the U.S. Marshal agent tasked with tracking him down. Edmund’s former Zoology classmate and girlfriend is now married to Raymond, but her lifelong love for Edmund leads her to sabotage her husband’s efforts to capture Edmund before he could be identified. Edmund does what he does best and just runs away.

Act 4:

• Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: Edmund has returned home with one last killing on his mind. He intends to drown his father in the same manner as the kittens were drowned years ago, but just short of killing him, he has a change of heart and allows him to live. Raymond has since identified Edmund and is about to capture him as he witnesses Edmund drowning his father. Raymond knows about Isabella and her love for Edmund so despite seeing Edmund release his father, he decides to shoot Edmund anyway. Before he can, however, the gunshot rings out and Isabella is shown with a gun in her hand as Raymond falls dead.

• Resolution: Edmund and Isabella return to the Ivory Coast where they will continue the fight against poachers.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s 4 Act Transformational Structure

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is how the process is helping me slowly develop the story. I am still not convinced this is progressing as I would like, but I am continuing to just fill in the blanks. Work deadlines have limited my writing time so I am a little behind, but I intend to catch up over the next couple weeks.

Concept: An environmentalist kills poachers using the same means as they killed their game.

Main Conflict: The battle between the protection of endangered trophy animals and the sanctity of human life.

Old Ways:

• Insecure

• Avoids conflict

• Incapable of dealing with his anger toward animal poachers

• Refusal to get involved

New Ways:

• Confident

• Deadly animal rights avenger

• Calculated eye for an eye mentality toward victims

• Incapable of walking away

Act 1:

• Opening: Edmund is a child in a poor family with a domineering and abusive father and a mother who can’t protect herself or her children.

• Inciting Incident: After suffering another beating from his father, Edmund witnesses his father drowning a litter of kittens just because they were inconvenient.

• Turning Point: Edmund vows to study Zoology and use his education as a platform to protect animals from monsters like his father.

Act 2:

• New plan: Edmund has graduated and now works as a zookeeper. The increasing incidence of ivory poachers and baby seal killings has him outraged.

• Plan in action: Through extensive research, networking and a series of trials, Edmund finally scores a meeting with the National Wildlife Federation to encourage them to go after poachers.

• Midpoint Turning Point: Edmund learns that the National Wildlife Federation actually turns their back on poachers in exchange for their financial contributions to the agency.

Act 3:

• Rethink everything: Edmund suddenly realizes that money controls everything and no agency will take on this battle.

• New plan: Edmund decides to defend the animals by retaliating against the poachers in the same manner they were killed.

• Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift: After a number of mercy killings, Edmund is nearly caught by Raymond, the U.S. Marshal agent tasked with tracking him down. Edmund’s former Zoology classmate and girlfriend is now married to Raymond, but her lifelong love for Edmund causes her to sabotage her husband’s efforts to capture Edmund before Raymond could identify him. Despite this apparent alliance with Isabella, Edmund decides to abandon his mission and simply run away.

Act 4:

• Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: Edmund has returned home and intends to drown his father in the same manner as he drowned the kittens years ago, but just short of killing him, he has a change of heart and allows him to live. Raymond has since identified Edmund and followed him only to witnesses Edmund seemingly about to drown his father. As Raymond is about to shoot Edmund, Isabella shoots her husband.

• Resolution: Edmund and Isabella return to the Ivory Coast to work together to fight poachers.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Subtext Plot

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is the struggle associated with creating out of nothing. I liked my overall concept, but putting together the story and the subtext plots were fairly difficult for me as I don’t know at this early time whether these assumptions will even work. It feels like I am just throwing random ideas at the wall and hoping they will stick.

Concept:

An environmentalist kills poachers using the same means as they killed their game.

Subtext Plots

• Layering

• A Major Cover Up

How Subtext will play out:

After the avenging environmentalist, has killed several animal poachers and his identity has been revealed, the U.S. Marshal service begins its pursuit. The wife of the U.S. Marshal agent tasked with tracking down the environmentalist once dated the environmentalist in college, and is still in love with him, so she begins to sabotage her husband’s pursuit efforts. The agent is dirty, however, and is actually involved in the poaching of elephants for their ivory tusks.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Transformational Journey

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is how a character’s internal and external journeys are developed and how the transforming character is the most interesting part of the story.

EDMUND

Arc Beginning: Helpless, almost incapable environmentalist.

Arc Ending: Calculated killer and animal rights avenger.

Internal Journey: From helpless to methodical and calculated.

External Journey: From refusal to get involved against the cruel poaching to becoming a lethal vigilante.

Old Ways:

• Insecure

• Avoids conflict

• Incapable of dealing with his anger toward animal poachers

• Refusal to get involved

New Ways:

• Confident

• Deadly animal rights avenger

• Calculated eye for an eye mentality toward victims

• Incapable of walking away

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Intentional Lead Characters

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is how to create something out of nothing using the tactics provided. Specifically, I began just filling in the blanks for the characters, knowing that while this first pass may not be the perfect answer, following the process will enable the right answers to emerge.

• Character: Edmund (protagonist)

• Logline: Edmund, bullied as a teenager, is now an environmentalist devoted to avenging the deaths of poached animals.

• Unique: Edmund kills poachers using the same means as the animals were killed.

• Character: Raymond (antagonist)

• Logline: Raymond is a U.S. Marshal agent tasked with tracking down this mercy killer.

• Unique: Raymond is married to a zookeeper and adores animals.

• Character: Isabella (triangle character)

• Logline: Isabella studied Zoology at Stanford with her boyfriend Edmund and is now a zookeeper, married to Raymond.

• Unique: While dating Edmund, Isabella knew about his teenage abuse and always tried to protect his fragile psyche.

[Marcus Armstrong]

MY VISION: I am going to be so disciplined in the daily writing process and become such an adept writer that my successful screenplays will launch me into a full-time writing career.

What I learned from doing this assignment is the importance of claiming my title and concept. While I have a title, concept and character structure, I had a couple other concepts that I liked equally as much. For now, however, I am just committed to the process to become a better writer instead of questioning my final choice.

Title: IVORY COAST

Concept: An environmentalist kills poachers using the same means as they killed their game.

Character Structure: Protagonist versus Antagonists

[Marcus Armstrong]

Hello everyone,

My name is Marc Armstrong, I recently moved from Las Vegas to Estes Park, CO, and am a hospital CFO by day. I took the BingeWorthy TV course a year ago and worked toward completing a script, but it is still a work in progress. As I stated in that class, I am literally the least-experienced person in this room. I took this course to “double down” (salute to Vegas) on my commitment to follow the process and keep writing no matter the quality. I want to focus on being creative, instead of being perfect. In six months, I would love to have completed a solid movie screenplay and become a more confident writer.

I was in the same Springfield, MO high school graduating class as Brad Pitt. Doesn’t do a thing for me, but it is a unique fun fact.

I look forward to learning from all of you.

Marc

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong

I agree to the terms of this release form.

GROUP RELEASE FORM

As a member of Writing Incredible Movies, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, through social media, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, videos, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

This completes the Group Release Form for the class.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong’s Character Descriptions

What I learned doing this assignment was that character development is going to be the most challenging part of writing for me. Between my job work demands and just an overall sense of not knowing where to go, I am submitting this response nearly 75 days late.

Nikolas Sutton

Role: Vigilante whose sole purpose is to avenge the murders of his family & other innocents.

Noteworthy traits: Moral character. Competitive sportsman. Overly confident.

Intriguing history: Source of rage comes from being held down by kidnappers while his girlfriend Sabrina was raped.

Intrigue? Inexperienced in combat and the use of weapons, yet pursues his targets fearlessly with reckless abandon. Will his girlfriend discover the truth? Will his drug trafficking be discovered?

Mystery? Nikolas comes home to find his parents, two brothers and sister have all been shot dead in a seemingly random manner.

Drive conflict? Nikolas’ revenge on Bryson’s brother causes Bryson much grief, yet it appears Bryson’s brother was innocent.

Irony: Seemingly morally upright, but is actually quite despicable.

Opposing agendas/conflict: His vengeance endangers his best friend and girlfriend.

Unpredictable? Rationalizes his actions as just steps in a sporting game.

Intriguing relationships: Nik alienates his best friend Brandon and the relationship gradually shifts from friends to near enemies. Is Charlie a true ally of Nik or does he have a revenge motive from high school? Will Nik discover Bryson’s affair with Sabrina and will it put a target on Bryson?

ROUGH DRAFT

START: A former high school star athlete turns vigilante to avenge the murders of his family. When he kills three of the four murderers, but one escapes, he decides to take the law into his own hands and similarly pursue other deserving criminals. His moral conviction and sense of sport helps him rationalize his newfound love by offering his captured targets one last fighting chance and releasing them only to be pursued a second time. If he catches them again, he will kill them, but if they evade capture for 10 days, they are forever free from Nik’s pursuit.

MIDDLE: Traits, inexperienced in use of weapons and combat, but pursues his targets with reckless abandon. Source of latent anger comes from years before when he witnessed his girlfriend being raped while he was detained. When Nik happens to see them, he is overtaken by rage with no intention of giving these rapists a second chance.

ENDING: Among Nik’s first victims was a falsely accused man whose brother Bryson is now out for revenge. It seems this innocent killing wasn’t Nik’s only stain. His longstanding stint as a drug trafficker contradicts everything he stood for, and it also may have been the real motive for his family’s murder.

Brandon Leek

Role: Nik’s best friend and chief confidant who helps by setting traps, but won’t kill.

Noteworthy traits: Loyal, certified genius, emotionally stoic

Intriguing history: Father’s suicide led to alcoholism, which he overcame only to become addicted to opioids.

Intrigue? Extremely intelligent and highly analytical, but will these assets be impaired by opioid use?

Mystery? Father’s suicide as the cause of his substance abuse is slowly revealed.

Drive conflict? Will his jealousy over Charlie’s blooming friendship with Nik drive him to harm or even kill Charlie or vice-versa?

Irony: Overcame alcohol only to become addicted to opioids.

Opposing agendas/conflict: A loyal asset to Nik whose addiction may endanger both of them.

Unpredictable? Opioid addiction leads to erratic behavior.

Intriguing relationships: The mutual hate between him and Nik’s girlfriend because to erode his friendship with Nik. He becomes rivals with Charlie over an alliance with Nik. Will their growing hatred for each other result in harm or death? His opioid addiction developed from Nik’s trafficking business, but Nik doesn’t make the connection.

ROUGH DRAFT

START: Best friend of Nik and his loyal confidant, who steadfastly maintains that he will help set traps for Nik, but will not kill. Has recently recovered from alcoholism only to develop an opioid addiction. It is slowly revealed that his substance abuse issues started after his father’s suicide.

MIDDLE: Brandon is a certified genius, highly analytical, but emotionally stoic. However, will his opioid abuse sabotage his intelligence and analytical capabilities? Will the erratic behavior caused by this addition, endanger him and Nik?

ENDING: His ongoing hatred for Nik’s girlfriend, Sabrina, has slowly eroded his friendship with Nik. Will Nik’s growing friendship with Charlie incite jealousy within Brandon sufficient for him to harm, or even kill, Charlie?

Charlie Anderson

Role: An outcast from high school where he was bullied, who goes through a similar tragedy as Nik, witnesses Nik in action and wants to get involved.

Noteworthy traits: Socially quirky, enamored with Nik, deceptive.

Intriguing history: To compensate for being perpetually bullied in high school, he secretly pursued the martial arts and is a black belt in Jiu Jitsu.

Intrigue? Due to his past, Charlie seems to be a big unhinged. Will he try to hurt or even kill Brandon or stick to killing the bad guys?

Mystery? What is Charlie’s true end game?

Drive conflict? Charlie’s attempt to sabotage Nik and Sabrina’s relationship by lying to her about Nik having an affair inadvertently leads to her affair with Bryson out of vengeance.

Irony: Charlie was bullied by Brandon in high school, but now Charlie bullies Brandon out of jealousy. Charlie’s weakness is female attention and his trigger is being judged, but he falls for a woman who is very judgmental. A genius with poor decision-making ability.

Opposing agendas/conflict: Desire to replace Brandon as Nik’s best friend.

Unpredictable? Charlie’s bullied past has him emotionally on-edge at all times.

Intriguing relationships: Charlie and Nik have become friends, but Nik is unaware that Charlie lied to Sabrina and has bullied Brandon to get there.

ROUGH DRAFT

START: A high school classmate of Nik and Brandon and outcast who was bullied due to his social quirkiness, suffers a loss similar to Nik, witnesses Nik in action exacting revenge and wants to get involved. He is enamored with Nik and is willing to deceive in order to be closer to him, including lying to Sabrina about Nik having an affair just to drive a wedge in their relationship.

MIDDLE: Unbeknownst to Nik and Brandon, Charlie has secretly attained the level of Jiu Jitsu black belt to compensate for his past. Charlie seems to be a bit unhinged and has begun to bully Brandon as he was bullied by Brandon in high school. Will he try to hurt or even kill Brandon or stick to killing the bad guys?

ENDING: It appears that Charlie desires to replace Brandon as Nik’s best friend; however, Nik is unaware that Charlie lied to Sabrina and has bullied Brandon to get there. What is Charlie’s true end game?

Bryson Volgard

Role: Brother of one of Nik’s first vigilante targets who only wants to avenge his brother’s death.

Noteworthy traits: Lethal, rages, wants to be his daughter’s hero.

Intriguing history: Raised in an abusive household, he is now an ex-Army Ranger with PTSD, and with his wife’s help, has learned how to live peacefully until Nik enters his life.

Intrigue? Has promised his wife that he has finally left his violent ways and desperately wants to be his daughter’s hero, yet he is now hiding his intense desire to avenge his brother’s death.

Mystery? He has enlisted the help of a fellow Ranger, but the viewer does not know who this mystery person is.

Drive conflict? To get intel on how to find Nik, he befriends Nik’s girlfriend Sabrina.

Irony: Poses as a meek family man, but is a raging killer. He has worked hard to be a devoted family man, yet he allows himself to be seduced by Sabrina.

Opposing agendas/conflict: Inadvertently puts Sabrina and her family in danger when he tracks Nik to her house.

Unpredictable? When Bryson finally finds Nik, he is shopping with his family.

Intriguing relationships: Bryson’s attempt to befriend Sabrina solely for intel on Nik backfires when they begin to have an affair, further complicating his double life.

ROUGH DRAFT

START: Brother of one of Nik’s first vigilante targets who only wants to avenge his brother’s death. Raised in an abusive household, he is now an ex-Army Ranger with PTSD, and with his wife’s help, has learned how to live peacefully until Nik enters his life.

MIDDLE: Accomplished in combat and quite lethal, Bryson poses as a meek family man to hide the raging killer within. He desperately wants to be his daughter’s hero and has promised his wife that he has finally left his violent ways; however, he is now hiding his intense desire to avenge his brother’s death from his family, but locates Nik while shopping with them. Will meek family man or raging killer prevail?

ENDING: To get intel on how to find Nik, he befriends Nik’s girlfriend Sabrina, who seduces him based on false pretenses. What started as a mistake has now turned into a full-blown affair, further complicating his double life. He has inadvertently put Sabrina and her family in danger when he tracks Nik to her house.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong’s Intriguing Concept and World

What I learned doing this assignment was how difficult it is to thoroughly define the World of the show. As I continue developing this, the harder it is to continue until some of my basic premises change.

Concept:

A. Devout Christian and former star athlete…

B. …in a virtually lawless society…

C. …against his own moral compass, seeks vengeance for the murder of his family

D. …but gives his targets one last chance to survive.

World:

Unique Sub-World: A rapidly deteriorating U.S. with minimal police protection

Previously unexplored: Justice is up to the individual

The unknown: Is he outmatched in survival and hunting skills?

The unseen: Alliances are unassured as survival is the primary objective of friend and foe.

Unheard of Dangers: With no due process of law, there is a risk of killing innocent people.

Reason to explore it: Vindication feels good.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong has completed the BW Framework!

What I learned from this BW Framework process is that it synthesized all of my previous work and quickly identified assumptions or elements which may, independently, be useful in creating a binge worthy show, but do not necessarily work together with other elements. I also discovered that my list of main characters may need to change and I even need to change a couple of their names to better differentiate them from other characters. Since this is the first time I have ever attempt to write a script of any kind, I am pleased with what I have learned, but do not necessarily want feedback at this time.

• This reply was modified 4 years ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 11 – Assignment #1

Discovering Irony: Revenge

The whole premise of the show, effectively, Emily Thorne’s (Amanda Clarke’s) eye for an eye strategy, is ironic.

Emily is wealthy enough to live her life, but instead chooses to spend her riches seeking revenge.

Emily donates $10K for a charity event then asks Ashley to go out for cheap margaritas.

Jack falls for the real Emily Thorne, thinking she is Amanda Clarke, his childhood friend, whereas the real Amanda Clarke loves Jack but chooses not to follow her feelings to instead stay true to her mission.

Frank Stevens and Tyler Barrol both outwit and surprise Emily, the protagonist whose sole mission is to covertly create chaos and sabotage.

The largest mansion in the Hamptons is right next door to one of the smallest.

Once Frank Stevens learns of Emily Thorne’s true identity, it is the real Emily Thorne who kills him.

We feel sorry for David Clark, who was betrayed and framed for a crime he didn’t commit, yet he was actually having an affair with Victoria Grayson.

Tyler Barrol and Nolan Ross are each trying to blackmail the other.

Emily is dating Daniel Grayson, the son of the very woman she wants most to target.

Tyler Barrol’s con game is unseated by his lost schizophrenia medication.

Conrad Grayson made the fortune, but it is Victoria Grayson who plays the part of elitist.

Charlotte Grayson would rather forego her wealthy lifestyle to live with blue collar Declan Porter.

Nolan Ross is so brilliant, but so timid.

Lesson 11 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Creating Irony

What I learned doing this assignment was irony is an amazing device that plays off the opposite, causing the same emotional effect as comedy.

Creating Irony: Catch and Release

Character Irony:

· Nik’s success as a star athlete is a façade as he used performance-enhancing drugs for years. He is literally nothing like his persona.

· Nik maintains the Christian persona, but he is a killer and drug trafficker.

· Poster boy Christian has so much pain in his heart that while he struggles to adhere to his moral convictions, he begins to delight in killing in the name of justice, becoming the antithesis of his intended self.

· Bryson professes to be a devoted family man, yet he has an affair with Sabrina.

· Brandon is a genius with poor decision-making ability.

· Charlie was bullied by Brandon in high school, but now he bullies Brandon out of jealousy.

· Sabrina has been steadfastly loyal to Nik since high school, yet she initiates an affair with Bryson.

· Bryson comes across as a meek family man, yet he is a raging killer.

· Nik rationalizes that revenge killing and drug trafficking are all part of God’s plan.

Situational Irony:

· Nik’s family was not killed as a random act of violence, but rather as a consequence of his attempt to leave the trafficking business.

· Nik is responsible for his best friend Brandon’s opioid addiction.

· Enemies Nik and Bryson develop a mutual respect for one another.

· Bryson tells his wife he is a fishing guide, but he actually fishes for human targets.

· Nik feels superior to Charlie given their high school personas, yet Charlie is now much more capable than Nik from a self-defense standpoint.

· When Nik killed Bryson’s brother for his involvement in the death of his family, he actually killed an innocent man.

· Brandon refuses to participate in the killing part of Nik’s vengeance, yet he finds himself in a situation where he must kill or be killed.

· Brandon had succeeded in overcoming alcohol, only to become addicted to opioids.

· Charlie’s weakness is female attention and his trigger is being judged. He falls for someone who is very judgmental.

· Charlie’s lie to Sabrina that Nik is cheating on her is the impetus behind her affair with Bryson.

· Sabrina’s brother was the fourth member of the team who killed Nik’s family, instead of Bryson’s brother.

• This reply was modified 4 years ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 10 – Assignment #1

Creating Intriguing Layers: Revenge

Plot Surface: Emily Thorne is the former Amanda Clarke, returning to her childhood home in the Hamptons to seek revenge upon those who betrayed and framed her father.

Layer 1: Obstacles: Con man Tyler Barrol, posing as Daniel’s friend, gains the Grayson family’s trust, but his own pursuits complicate Emily’s plans. The real Emily Thorne moves to the Hamptons and poses as Amanda Clarke.

Layer 2: Blackmail: Tyler discovers Lydia’s letter to expose the framing of David Clarke by the Graysons and uses it as leverage to remain employed by the Grayson family business.

Layer 3: Wildcards: Tyler’s behavior is erratic to begin with, but then he is shown running out of his schizophrenia medication, further adding to his unpredictability.

Character Surface: Emily Porter (Emily Thorne) had a troubled childhood and ended up in the same juvenile detention center as Amanda Clarke. Amanda Clarke pays her a lot of hush money and they switch identities so she can pursue her plan for revenge as Emily Thorne. Thanks to a nosy investigator, she learns the location of Amanda Clarke and decides to move to the same small community.

Layer 2: Love Triangle: She begins dating Amanda Clarke’s childhood friend, and lifetime love interest, Jack Porter.

Layer 3: Betrayal: Although Amanda Clarke bought her a plane ticket to leave the area, she defiantly stays, putting Amanda’s plans in jeopardy.

Other Plot Layers include Nolan Ross and Tyler Barrol’s love interest, Charlotte Grayson’s continued interest in blue collar Declan Porter, Lydia Davis’ survival of Frank Stevens’ attack and her knowledge of the Graysons’ betrayal of David Clarke.

Lesson 10 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Plot and Character Layers

What I learned doing this assignment was that this has been the most difficult assignment for me so far. I have had a lot of ideas for plot development and for the elements of intrigue, mystery and plot twists, but it still feels quite disjointed with so many moving variables and no semblance of cohesiveness.

Inviting Obsession Through Open Loops: Catch and Release

PLOT LAYERS – Story beneath the story

· Major scheme revealed – Nik’s sense of sport turns his vigilante endeavor into a game.

· Mystery revealed – Nik’s double life as a drug trafficker is exposed.

· Thought the story was one thing, but it is another – Nik’s family was not killed as a random act of violence, but rather as a consequence of his attempt to leave the trafficking business.

· Major shift in Meaning – Flashback to Nik’s freshman year where he and Sabrina were kidnapped and he was held down while Sabrina was raped. This is the true source of his rage.

· Hidden history – Brandon’s opioid addiction developed from Nik’s trafficking business.

· Hidden plan – While working out his game of vigilante with the criminal of the week, he intends to kill each of Sabrina’s rapists without regard to the rules of his game.

· Major betrayal – Sabrina falls for Bryson, who is married and is Nik’s enemy.

CHARACTER LAYERS – Identity beneath the identity

· Secret identity – Nik maintains the Christian persona, but he is bloodthirsty for revenge over Sabrina’s assault. He is also a drug trafficker.

· Character intrigue – Poster boy Christian has so much pain in his heart that while he struggles to adhere to his moral convictions, he begins to delight in killing in the name of justice, becoming the antithesis of his intended self.

· Hidden relationships and conspiracies – After befriending Sabrina to learn more about Nik, Bryson is seduced by her and begins having an affair.

· Hidden Character history – Nik’s success as a star athlete is a façade as he used performance-enhancing drugs for years. He is literally nothing like his persona.

Plot Surface:

· Layer 1: Nik’s family is killed while he is out, seemingly in a random act, leading Nik to a vigilante lifestyle.

· Layer 2: Nik’s sports background and apparent moral code causes him to give the target a fighting chance.

· Layer 3: Nik’s double life as a drug trafficker is exposed.

· Layer 4: Nik’s family was not killed as a random act of violence, but rather as a consequence of his attempt to leave the trafficking business.

· Layer 5: Flashback to Nik’s freshman year where he and Sabrina were kidnapped and he was held down while Sabrina was raped. This is the true source of his rage.

· Layer 6: While working out his game of vigilante with the criminal of the week, he intends to kill each of Sabrina’s rapists without regard to the rules of his game.

· Layer 7: Brandon’s opioid addiction developed from Nik’s trafficking business.

Character Surface:

· Layer 1: Nik is a Christian and former athlete who leaves a wholesome life.

· Layer 2: Nik maintains the Christian persona, but he is bloodthirsty for revenge over Sabrina’s assault. He is also a drug trafficker.

· Layer 3: Poster boy Christian has so much pain in his heart that while he struggles to adhere to his moral convictions, he begins to delight in killing in the name of justice, becoming the antithesis of his intended self.

· Layer 4: Nik’s success as a star athlete is a façade as he used performance-enhancing drugs for years. He is literally nothing like his persona.

• This reply was modified 4 years ago by  Marcus Armstrong.
• This reply was modified 4 years ago by  Marcus Armstrong.
• This reply was modified 4 years ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 9 – Assignment #1

Inviting Obsession Through Open Loops: Revenge

1. Big Picture Open Loops

· Will Emily (Amanda) ever get together with Jack?

· Will Amanda get caught?

· Will she exact revenge on everyone she believes to be culpable in her father’s betrayal?

· Does Nolan Ross truly want a friendship with Jack Porter or is this part of a bigger plan?

· Who presumably killed Daniel Grayson?

· Will Declan Porter end up dating Charlotte Grayson?

· What is Tyler Barrol’s ultimate end game?

· Are Victoria Grayson and Frank Stevens having an affair?

2. Episode 9

· The original Emily Thorne shows up and shows interest in Jack Porter, who seems intent on reciprocating. How will this complicate Amanda’s plan for revenge?

· How will Amanda react to Emily’s interest in Jack?

· Nolan gives the boat back to Jack after buying it. Does this support the friendship or a possible ulterior motive?

· Declan does end up dating Charlotte, against her mom’s wishes, but after attending a dinner at the Grayson’s house, his disgust with the pretentiousness overwhelms him and he leaves. Charlotte follows him back to the bar and makes it clear that she still cares for him. How will this conflict with her family escalate?

· Tyler has brought Ashley, Victoria’s assistant, into his secret ploy, but we still don’t know his end game other than an apparent con man.

· Frank Stevens is murdered by Emily Thorne and Victory seems genuinely hurt by this.

Lesson 9 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Big Picture Open Loops

What I learned doing this assignment was that while open loops obviously lend to obsession, it takes some creativity to develop them. I am finding an overlap between mystery and open loops. In fact, the more issues I note the more challenging it is to figure out how to piece it all together. I am hoping that future lessons will help sort this out.

Inviting Obsession Through Open Loops: Catch and Release

GOALS

· New goals? Nikolas wants to find out who killed his family and why? Bryson is intent on killing Nikolas. Charlie wants to steal away Nik’s girlfriend.

· Goals related to the big picture? Nik feels he needs to compensate for not being able to save his family by taking on the role of judge, jury and executioner.

· Crushed goals? Nikolas cannot adhere to his moral Christian values, especially violating one of the Ten Commandments.

· Competition / conflict around goals? Will Charlie help or hinder Nik’s actions?

CONSEQUENCES

· Are they going to be caught? Will Nik be killed by Bryson? Will any of them be killed? Will Nik tell Sabrina the truth?

· Problems created from past actions? Nik’s secret drug trafficking may have put a target on his family.

· Good plans gone wrong?

SOLVING PROBLEMS

· What is the major problem for this character? Nik’s internal struggle regarding his values is his major preoccupation.

· What are they trying to solve?

· Major change imposed on character? Nik transitions from focusing on serving and helping others to fulfilling his fleshly desire to impose justice.

· Previous solutions cause new problems? Nik kills a target who is not a good person, but who is innocent of the crime.

RELATIONSHIPS

· Relationships in peril? Nik and Brandon were best friends, but the relationship is in trouble.

· New relationships forming? Nik and Charlie are acquaintances, but form a friendship.

· Conflict inside relationships? Nik and Sabrina are beginning to have problems due to Nik’s preoccupation with his secret life. Brandon and Sabrina are enemies.

· Relationships changing? Nik & Bryson develop mutual respect as enemies.

DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS

· Can they survive X? Can Brandon survive his opioid addiction? Can Nik and Sabrina’s relationship survive?

· Putting themselves in danger / making dangerous decisions?

· Who else is pulled into their danger? Sabrina and her family are inadvertently put in danger when Bryson tracks Nik to her house.

· Internal dangers (drug addiction, need for medicine, inner demons)? Brandon’s opioid addiction. Charlie’s low self-esteem from years of being bulled

Top Big Picture Open Loops:

1. Will Bryson kill Nik or his friends?

2. Will Sabrina discover the truth about Nik?

3. Will their relationship survive?

4. Can Brandon survive his opioid addiction?

5. Will Charlie’s low self-esteem get him killed?

6. Will Nik be able to escape from the drug trafficking?

7. Will Nik ever return to his Christian roots?

8. Will there be a consequence when Nik inadvertently kills an innocent target?

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong. Reason: Adding Assignment #2

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong’s Character Interviews

What I learned doing this assignment is the process of engaging in a conversation helps the information to flow organically. I am not sure if I am nearly deep enough yet, but this series of questions and their answers helps this feel like more of a story.

Protagonist: Brock Creed

Tell me about yourself, Brock.

I’m 42 and was born in Lodi, California. Before they were killed in a car accident when I was only 8 years old, my dad drove for Coca-Cola and my mom stayed home with my brother, sister and me, and sold Avon for some spending money. I am the oldest of the three kids. My sister Jayne is 39 and my brother Anthony is 35. He was just a baby when my parents died. We all three went to a foster home, but fortunately they kept us together. In Junior High, I had a sleepover at a friend’s house and we watched Top Gun. From that moment, I was hooked and knew I wanted to become a Naval Aviator. After graduating from OCS, however, I learned that my stigmatism was going to keep me out of a fighter jet and I didn’t want to fly anything else. So that is when I changed my goal to become a SEAL.

Why do you think you were called to this journey? Why you?

I am tenacious, like a bulldog, and don’t ever give up. To combat an entire institution such as the Communist Party of California requires unequaled fortitude. I have always been patriotic and believe, with my entire being, in the American dream of freedom.

In order to survive to accomplish this, you are going to have to step way outside of your box. What changes do you expect to make and which of them will be the most difficult?

I am going to have to learn to trust, and even depend on, others. I have always flown solo, partly because I am fiercely independent, but also to protect myself from getting hurt.

What habits or ways of thinking do you think will be the most difficult to let go of?

I have to learn how to treat others with respect and learn how to connect. Sometimes I come across too impatiently and direct. I have always been mission-focused instead of focusing on the people I am helping or who assist me. This is all I have known for most of my life.

What fears, insecurities and wounds have held you back?

My fears have never been about getting hurt or killed. My biggest fear is that I will fail in my mission to rescue as many Californians as I can.

What skills, background or expertise makes you well-suited to face this conflict or antagonist?

I am deadly with my hands and even deadlier with a firearm. As a former SEAL, I am trained in covert operations, in operating stealthily, moving undetected. Fortunately, and unfortunately, I know the Communist leader, Gerard Keizer, as he and I went to the same boys’ school. We were friends and I even saved him from a potentially lethal bullying. But I do know how he thinks.

What are you hiding from the other characters? What don’t you want them to know?

I don’t want them to know what I just told you…that I know Gerard Keizer. I am afraid that should this get out, my credibility as a win-at-all-costs leader might be questioned. I also don’t want my personal tragedies to be known, such as the death of my parents at such a young age, being raised in a foster home and boys’ school, and my wife’s affair. I don’t want any sympathy. I just want to focus on the mission at hand.

What do you think of Gerard Keizer?

Gerard was a tall, lanky kid, who I met back at the boys’ school in Stockton. He was a bit of a free spirit, but for some reason, he must have shown weakness because he was frequently bullied, and maybe worse than that. I always felt like I needed to protect him. Fast-forward 25 years and I almost don’t recognize him. He is so liberal and arrogant, almost as if it is a coping mechanism for his childhood abuse. I get that people like that might have the need for control, but I personally think his attempt to control the entire state is a personal vendetta. And he sure is a good manipulator and smooth talker so he almost sneaks up on you and captures you.

Tell me your side of this whole conflict.

I am a freedom fighter. A patriot. A lover of America. Our country was founded to be a Republic, not subject to Communist rule. I can’t believe what has happened to California in a very short period of time. I just refuse to accept this as our final fate. When I was in the military, I was prepared to die to defend our freedoms, and this is no different.

What does it do for your life if you succeed here?

I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about the repercussions should we prevail. I suppose I would again have my freedom to live my life according to my terms. Of course, if everything was to be perfect, then I might not know what to do with myself. I was born to fight.

Other than personal gratification, is there anyone else important to you for whom you would be leading this fight?

Although I haven’t seen him for five years as he lives with his mother, my 17-year old son Tyson is my biggest motivation. I think his mother has affected him, because he refuses to talk to me when I call. I want nothing more than to give him a future that involves something other than a life of bondage.

Antagonist: Gerard Keizer

Tell me about yourself.

I was born in Seattle, but my parents moved to Fremont, California when I was 8. I’m 41 now. My parents had a very turbulent marriage and fought all the time. In fact, because of the constant yelling, I developed a nervous tic. When I was 14, I began to act out and my parents didn’t know how to handle it so they sent me over to Stockton to an all-boys’ school. I guess my nervous habits made me a target for ridicule and bullying, including one horrifying night where I was molested by one of the older students. I developed a thick skin and a calloused heart and resolved to never let anyone else control me again. In fact, I intend to not only control my life, but I aspire to control the entire state of California.

Having to do with this journey, what are your strengths and weaknesses?

Some say I am overly confident, perhaps even arrogant. I am not sure about that or if that is even a strength or a weakness, to be honest. I am also very smart, technically classified as a genius, but I never really spoke of that before. I have developed the ability to talk to anyone, to uplift them until they trust me and then to encourage them to do things for me. Some people say that I am manipulative. I like to call it resourceful. I believe that I am above reproach sometimes, but perhaps that is my biggest weakness, to not know where I might be vulnerable.

Why are you committed to making Brock Creed fail?

This is difficult for me. Brock came to my rescue back in high school when I was being abused by a group of boys. He saved me from them. If it wasn’t Brock, it would make it so much easier. I am committed to the cause. I have seen so many bad things done in the name of freedom, that I totally supported this large and swift movement to control the state of California. We have been called Communists, but I believe we are just saving the people from themselves. I truly believe this is the best course of action for the state and its citizens.

What do you get out of winning this fight?

Once the renegade faction is conquered, we can look forward to decades of state protection for Californians, where we won’t get hung up on social or economic classes, but where everyone contributes and shares in the resources. Most people don’t want the reckless feeling of being free. They want to be taken care of.

What drives you toward your mission, even in the face of danger, ruin or death?

I feel like I already died given all of the trauma from my childhood. So I am not afraid to die an earthly death and really feel as if I have nothing to lose. I believe wholeheartedly in this mission, that we are saving Californians from themselves.

What secrets must you keep to succeed? What other secrets do you keep out of fear or insecurity?

I cannot afford for people to learn of my past relationship with Brock Creed. My credibility as the leader of the state would be in jeopardy. I also don’t want people to know how I was bullied, and even molested, as a child for the same reason.

Compared to other people like you, what makes you special?

As I said, I am very intelligent. I have this gift of retaining nearly everything I have learned over the years. I am also charismatic and people are naturally drawn to me.

What do you think of Brock Creed?

Brock is a very brave man, someone who fights for others. I respect the heck out of Brock, especially how he befriended me and came to my rescue back in high school. On the other hand, he is delusional when he thinks this country is better off as a Republic.

Tell me your side of this whole conflict.

Brock started this conflict. His choice in attempting to help Californians flee the state is really the impetus behind it. Things were going pretty great before that. We will contain Brock and his team and prevent him from succeeding, even if he must die in the process. I love Brock, but I am willing to kill him to keep the state under control.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 8 – Assignment #1

Inviting Obsession Through Mystery: Revenge

Shocking Event: In the opening scene, Emily’s fiancé Daniel is shot and presumed dead. The shooter is not identified, but Jack Porter was dragging his body along the beach to hide it behind ground cover. The story then flashes back several months to the time Emily first came to the Hamptons.

Secret: We think Jack shot Daniel, but we don’t know for sure and definitely do not know why.

Smaller Mysteries

· The real Emily Thorne shows up and threatens to expose Amanda Clarke. Amanda gives her money to “disappear” to Paris, but Emily decides to stay in the Hamptons and pursue a relationship with Jack. Will this compromise Amanda’s plan?

· What are Tyler and Ashley up to? Tyler seems to be a con man but his full agenda is still hidden. Ashley is tiring of working for the Graysons, and despises Victoria, and Tyler seems to be having a negative influence on her. Similarly, her agenda is not fully known.

Lesson 8 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Show Mysteries

What I learned doing this assignment was that this has been the most difficult step in the process for me. The exercise did stimulate my creativity, but it did not come quickly and now I am several days behind.

Inviting Obsession Through Mystery: Catch and Release

Shocking Event Mystery

A. Shocking Event: Nikolas leaves home for 30 minutes to run an errand, but he returns home to find his parents, two brothers and sister have all been shot dead.

B. Secret: Who would commit such a senseless crime and why?

C. Investigation: With limited law enforcement available, Nikolas sets out to solve the mystery himself.

Who: Unknown until 2^nd and 3^rd episodes.

What: His family has all been shot and killed.

Where: His parents and sister were in the living room, one brother was in the kitchen, and the other brother was in the hallway.

When: Sometime in a 30-minute window.

Why: Unknown until season one finale.

How: Three were shot at close-range with a .45 caliber pistol, one with a 9mm pistol and the other with a shotgun. There is no sign of a break-in.

Part Withheld: We know there are four intruders, three with guns, but we never see any identities. We have no idea whether these people were known by the family or if this was random. We do not know the motivation.

Over Time Mystery

A. Cover up: Nikolas comes across as a devout Christian, popular, and morally upstanding, but he has been leading a double life.

B. Secret: Starting with his own prescription pain medication due to his sports injuries, Nik has created a local drug trafficking business.

C. Reveals: We learn over time that what appeared to be a random act of violence against his family was motivated by a supplier who wanted to punish Nik when he tried to do the right thing and get out of the distribution business.

Who: Nikolas Sutton

What: Secretly trafficking drugs.

Where: The local county.

When: Has been going on for most of the last four years since high school.

Why: Started out to earn a little extra money with leftover prescription pain meds.

How: After moving his opioids with ease, he desired to earn even more money by moving other drugs.

Part Withheld: How did he get so involved that when he tried to get out, his family was killed?

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong’s Character Profiles Part 2

What I learned doing this assignment is that while my initial character profile choices might be good, they may not be strong enough to make this a compelling plot.

Protagonist: Brock Creed

What draws us to this character? Despite childhood trauma and recent betrayal, a patriot with lethal skills, against amazing odds, attempts to outsmart the Communist Party of California and lead several bands of refugees out of the state to freedom. His love for country is infectious. He is a fighter and a winner.

Traits: Fearless, Strategic, Tenacious, Emotionally Closed

Subtext: He is skeptical and untrusting, but masks this by acting decisively and with conviction.

Flaw: He personally cares for his enemy, Gerard Keizer, a childhood friend.

Values: Freedom, Liberty, America

Irony: Despite his professed love for America, he had given up on his country and purchased a retirement house in Panama before the overthrow of California by the Communist party.

What makes this the right character for this role? To succeed at such an endeavor as helping refugees escape, the hero must be a skilled fighter, a strategist, and someone who never gives up.

Antagonist: Gerard Keizer

What draws us to this character? He is charismatic and extremely smart, a smooth talker. He has a deep respect for Brock Creed, his enemy, due to an incident from their childhood.

Traits: Arrogant, controlling, manipulative, oppressor

Subtext: His seductive speech is a tool of manipulation.

Flaw: Arrogant and believes he is above reproach

Values: Power, control, oppression

Irony: He must kill the very man who saved his life as a teenager.

What makes this the right character for this role? A smooth-tongued manipulator would be integral in seizing control of the state of California.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 7 – Assignment #1

Empathy/Distress: Revenge

A. Undeserved Misfortune: Emily Thorne (as the young Amanda Clarke) loses her father and her entire childhood in an instant when he is framed for a crime he didn’t commit.

B. External Character Conflicts: Intentional – Emily despises the Graysons due to their betrayal and Victoria detests Emily because she is an outsider who is dating her son. Unintentional – Emily is dating Daniel as part of the plan to penetrate the Grayson family, but she hurts herself when her childhood friend Jack shows interest in her and she has to turn him down. Jack’s pain is also unintentional.

C. Plot Intruding On Life: Due to Frank’s meddling investigation, he tracks down the real Emily Thorne, who has swapped names with Amanda Clarke, but the real Emily kills Frank and shows up at the alias Emily’s house, which will complicate her plans.

D. Moral Dilemmas: Emily is using Daniel to get closer to the Graysons, but she is truly beginning to fall in love with him because he is not like the rest of the family. She does love Jack, however, and would love to be with him, but when he shows interest in her and asks her out on a date, she could choose to leave behind her revenge plan and sail away with Jack (as Nolan tells her), but instead, she rejects him to stick to the bigger plan.

E. Forced Decisions They’d Never Make: Victoria is forced to accept Emily because she is dating Daniel and she doesn’t want to strain her relationship with her son.

Lesson 7 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Show Empathy/Distress

What I learned doing this assignment was that the thing that draws in the audience and helps them really connect with the characters is empathizing with them and worrying about them in distressing situations. This creates the pull to keep watching the story unfold.

Empathy/Distress: Catch and Release

A. Undeserved Misfortune: Nikolas’ parents, brothers and sister were all mass murdered in a senseless crime. Charlie was bullied in high school.

B. External Character Conflicts: Intentional – Charlie is jealous of Brandon’s friendship with Nik. Unintentional – When Charlie lies to Nik’s girlfriend Sabrina and tells her that Nik is cheating on her to sabotage their relationship, he unintentionally causes her great grief.

C. Plot Intruding On Life: While justified in the eyes of Nik, the protagonist, his revenge takes the life of Bryson’s brother, causing Bryson much grief.

D. Moral Dilemmas: Nik’s mission to track down and kill criminals contradicts his Christian values. Bryson vowed to his wife that he left behind his violent ways in war and would never return to them.

E. Forced Decisions They’d Never Make: Although Brandon has vowed to only help set traps for Nik, but never kill for him, he is put into a situation where he must kill or be killed.

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong’s Character Profiles Part 1

What I learned doing this assignment is that my first pass at profile characteristics is not very strong. I hope to improve as the course progresses.

Protagonist: Brock Creed

Role in the story: Hero & Fighter. Retired Navy SEAL and instigator of movement to help California captives escape.

Age Range and Descriptions: Male, 42, lean and muscular.

Internal Journey: From closed off emotionally to developing deep personal connections.

External Journey: From a gruff and untrustworthy rescuer to a beloved leader who cares about his escapees.

Motivation: To keep California and America free.

Wound: Both parents died in an accident when he was 8. He spent time in a foster home and a boys’ school. His wife had an affair.

Mission/Agenda: To free Californians

Secret: The appointed Communist leader was his best friend in the boys’ school.

What Makes Him Special? Easily able to separate personal feelings to remain focused on the mission at hand.

Antagonist: Gerard Keizer

Role in the story: Authority. Left-leaning liberal who has been appointed leader of the California Communist party.

Age Range and Descriptions: Male, 41, trim, bespectacled.

Internal Journey: From arrogant and controlling to contrite.

External Journey: From staunch Communist to imprisoned patriot.

Motivation: To oppress and control.

Wound: Molested as a teenager at the boys’ school.

Mission/Agenda: To contain Californians and punish defectors.

Secret: Brock Creed saved him from being beaten to death after the molestation.

What Makes Him Special? He is brilliant with a smooth tongue to influence others.

[Marcus Armstrong]

I, Marcus Armstrong agree to the terms of this release form.

GROUP RELEASE FORM FOR “THE 30 DAY SCREENPLAY”

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, communications, lessons, and models of the 30 Day Screenplay confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, communications, lessons, and models of the 30 Day Screenplay available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

This completes the Group Release Form for The 30 Day Screenplay class.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 6 – Assignment #1

Build Your Character Relationship: Revenge

Emily’s Relationship with Victoria

Surface: Neighbors

Common Ground: Wealthy, socialites

Conflict: Victoria despises that Emily is dating Daniel. Emily wants to avenge the framing of her father.

History: Victoria had an affair and was in love with Emily’s father, but she helped frame him for a felony and he died in prison. Emily wants revenge.

Subtext: Contempt

Relationship Arc: Unassuming neighbor to rivals and potential revenge victim.

Emily’s Relationship with Jack

Surface: Friend (childhood friend)

Common Ground: Jack’s dog (Emily’s former dog)

Conflict: Jack wants to date Emily and Emily loves Jack but cannot let him know.

History: As a young girl (Amanda Clarke), she knew Jack, and actually was the owner of his dog.

Subtext: Love

Relationship Arc: Childhood friends to just friends to possibly more than friends.

Emily’s Relationship to Daniel

Surface: Boyfriend

Common Ground: Dating

Conflict: Emily loves Jack

History: Daniel is a new boyfriend.

Subtext: Means to an end.

Relationship Arc: From acquaintances to engaged.

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 6 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Show Relationship Map

Catch and Release

What I learned from this assignment is that the relationship map between two people may differ slightly from each respective perspective.

Nik’s Relationship to Brandon

Surface: Best Friend

Common Ground: Alignment of vigilante purpose

Conflict: Nik’s girlfriend resents Brandon

History: Former high school athletes / teammates

Subtext: Conspirators

Relationship Arc: From best friends to estranged

Nik’s Relationship to Charlie

Surface: Protege

Common Ground: Alignment of purpose

Conflict: Charlie attempts to sabotage Nik’s relationship

History: Graduated together, but Charlie was bullied

Subtext: Nik feels superior to Charlie

Relationship Arc: From different high school cliques to close friends

Nik’s Relationship to Bryson

Surface: Adversaries

Common Ground: Both capable / worthy adversaries

Conflict: Bryson wants to kill Nik

History: Nik killed Bryson’s brother

Subtext: Respected enemies

Relationship Arc: From bitter hatred to mutual respect

Brandon’s Relationship to Nik

Surface: Best Friend

Common Ground: Fully supports Nik’s cause

Conflict: Nik’s girlfriend is driving a wedge in their friendship

History: Former high school athletes / teammates

Subtext: Conspirators

Relationship Arc: From best friends to estranged

Brandon’s Relationship to Charlie

Surface: Fellow vigilante

Common Ground: Fellow high school graduate

Conflict: Charlie is jealous of Brandon’s friendship with Nik

History: Graduated together, but Charlie was bulled by Brandon

Subtext: Competing for Nik’s attention

Relationship Arc: From mutual tolerance to mutual contempt

Brandon’s Relationship to Bryson

Surface: Enemies

Common Ground: Both intelligent

Conflict: A threat to Nik

History: Nik killed Bryson’s brother

Subtext: Saboteur of Bryson’s plan to kill Nik

Relationship Arc: From strangers to bitter adversaries

Charlie’s Relationship to Nik

Surface: Mentor

Common Ground: Alignment of purpose

Conflict: Adores Nik and jealous of his girlfriend

History: Graduated together, but Nik was popular

Subtext: Charlies feels inferior to Nik

Relationship Arc: From different high school cliques to close friends

Charlie’s Relationship to Brandon

Surface: Fellow vigilante

Common Ground: Fellow high school graduate

Conflict: Charlie is jealous of Brandon’s friendship with Nik

History: Graduated together, but Brandon bullied Charlie

Subtext: Competing for Nik’s attention

Relationship Arc: From mutual tolerance to mutual contempt

Charlie’s Relationship to Bryson

Surface: Enemies

Common Ground: Experts in martial arts and hand-to-hand combat

Conflict: A threat to Nik

History: Only first met during the story arc

Subtext: Mutual respect

Relationship Arc: From strangers to respected adversaries

Bryson’s Relationship to Nik

Surface: Adversaries

Common Ground: Worthy adversaries

Conflict: Wants to kill Nik

History: Nik killed Bryson’s brother

Subtext: Respected enemies

Relationship Arc: From bitter hatred to mutual respect

Bryson’s Relationship to Brandon

Surface: Enemies

Common Ground: Both intelligent

Conflict: Brandon is an impediment

History: Brandon is Nik’s ally

Subtext: Brandon is a saboteur of Bryson’s plan to kill Nik

Relationship Arc: From strangers to bitter adversaries

Bryson’s Relationship to Charlie

Surface: Enemies

Common Ground: Experts in martial arts and hand-to-hand combat

Conflict: Another impediment

History: Only met during the story arc

Subtext: Mutual respect

Relationship Arc: From strangers to respected adversaries

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marc Armstrong’s Transformational Journey

What I learned doing this assignment is that by first defining the Character Arc and how the hero must change, the journey and plot will follow.

Who is the Hero and what is his Character Arc that represents a transformation?

Brock Creed – retired Navy SEAL and instigator of movement to help California captives escape.

· Internal Journey: From closed off emotionally to developing deep personal connections.

· External Journey: From a gruff and untrustworthy rescuer to a beloved leader who cares about his escapees.

What are the Old Ways and New Ways?

Old Ways:

· Closed off; unable to build relationships

· Mission-focused

· Obstinate; rejects others’ ideas

New Ways:

· Emotionally available

· Interested in others

· Learns to love

· Collaborative leader of men and women

[Marcus Armstrong]

Hello everyone,

My name is Marc Armstrong and I live in Las Vegas. I have not written any scripts, but have one underway in the Binge Worthy TV course. I am a sponge and look forward to learning anything and everything about screenplay writing.

I was in the same Kickapoo High School (Springfield, MO) graduating class as Brad Pitt so that is about as close as I have gotten to a screenplay.

I look forward to learning from all of you.

Marc

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.
• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 5 – Assignment #1

Emotional Profiles: Revenge

Emily Thorne

A. Situational: Hope: Seek revenge on every culpable person. / Fear: Being stopped

B. Motivation: Want: Inflict pain & loss. / Need: Justice

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: Closed off. / Public Mask: Hamptons socialite.

D. Weaknesses: Jack Porter, Resists help (from Nolan)

E. Triggers: Being threatened

F. Coping Mechanism: Strategizes, plans her next attack

Victoria Grayson

A. Situational: Hope: To remain queen of the Hamptons / Fear: Her status crumbles

B. Motivation: Want: Eliminate any social threats / Need: To be center of attention

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: Feels unloved Public Mask: Face of strength

D. Weaknesses: Remorse over innocents killed on airliner, lost love David Clarke

E. Triggers: Social status is threatened, husband’s infidelity

F. Coping Mechanism: Manipulation

Nolan Ross

A. Situational: Hope: To win Emily’s approval / Fear: Rejection

B. Motivation: Want: To fit in Need: Acceptance

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: Insecure, nervous / Public Mask: Confident (overly so)

D. Weaknesses: Arrogance

E. Triggers: Emily’s indifference

F. Coping Mechanism: Manipulation through guilt

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 5 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Character Emotions

What I learned doing this assignment is how we learn behavior through contrasts such as hope vs. fear, want vs. need and negative emotion vs. public mask. This is a great way to “fill in the blanks” in character development.

Show – Catch and Release

Nikolas Sutton

A. Situational: Hope: To provide some justice in the world / Fear: Be killed or found out

B. Motivation: Want: To avenge needless crimes / Need: Sense of sport

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: Bloodthirsty / Public Mask: Church youth group leader

D. Weaknesses: Overly confident

E. Triggers: Injustices, bullies

F. Coping Mechanism: Denial

Brandon Leek

A. Situational: Hope: That he is useful to Nik / Fear: Being arrested or killed

B. Motivation: Want: To have a voice / Need: Nik’s respect

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: Shame (for drug addiction) / Public Mask: Stoic

D. Weaknesses: Opioids of any kind

E. Triggers: Impatience or rudeness

F. Coping Mechanism: Analyzes

Charlie Anderson

A. Situational: Hope: To bring justice / Fear: Speaking in front of a group

B. Motivation: Want: A friendship with Nik / Need: Validation

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: Deceptive / Public Mask: Loyal

D. Weaknesses: Female attention

E. Triggers: Bullies, being judged

F. Coping Mechanism: Manipulates

Bryson Volgard

A. Situational: Hope: To be his daughter’s hero / Fear: His secret life being discovered by family

B. Motivation: Want: To vindicate his brother’s involvement / Need: Family’s respect

C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion: Rages / Public Mask: Meek family man

D. Weaknesses: Emotional wall

E. Triggers: Threats, real or perceived

F. Coping Mechanism: Fights back

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 4 – Assignment #1

Character Intrigue: Revenge

1. Character Intrigue from Previous Episodes:

Emily Thorne

Role: Heiress who seeks revenge

Hidden agendas: Befriends each target before springing the trap.

Competition: She is dating Daniel Grayson, despite his protective mother’s objections.

Conspiracy: Conspires with Nolan to pull off acts of vengeance.

Secrets: She remembers her father’s affair with Victoria, how he was dragged away by the FBI, and each person’s part in the betrayal of him at his trial.

Deception: She lies and befriends each episode’s “target” under false pretenses.

Wound: Her father was wrongfully accused, sent to prison, and was ultimately killed.

Secret Identity: She is really Amanda Clarke.

Victoria Grayson

Role: Matriarch of the wealthy Grayson family

Hidden agendas: To remain the most powerful person in the Hamptons

Competition: Emily’s recent arrival is a threat.

Conspiracy: She is asking the family security agent to thoroughly investigate Emily to look for dirt.

Secrets: She desires to undermine Emily since her son is dating her. She still longs for her lost love, David Clarke.

Deception: She holds parties and enjoys to social scene, but she distrusts everybody.

Wound: Her love interest was framed for a crime and sent to prison, where he died.

Secret Identity: She is as cold-blooded as Emily.

Nolan Ross

Role: Accomplice to Emily

Hidden agendas: Will do anything for Emily’s approval or to have anyone befriend him

Competition: Jack is the object of Emily’s deep love.

Conspiracy: Conspires with Emily to pull off acts of vengeance.

Secrets: He seems to be in love with Emily.

Deception: Will lie to anyone as dictated by Emily

Wound: Outcast

Secret Identity: Alias of Amanda Clarke posing as a philanthropist

2. Character Intrigue in Episode 4

Emily Thorne

Secrets: She is posting as a patient of a mental health doctor to get revenge for how she was treated as a child.

Deception: She cleverly includes her own session in a leaked counseling video to avoid any incrimination.

Wound: In flashbacks, she is seen being locked up in an institution and being denied access to her father by the mental health doctor.

Nolan Ross

Deception: For some unknown reason, he is referring Jack Porter to the website of the leaked video to make him think Emily is into him. He is almost playing matchmaker, perhaps to keep her away from Daniel Grayson.

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 4 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Character Intriguing Character Layers

What I learned doing this assignment is how each person is complex, whether ourselves, family members, coworkers or even our characters. The seven layers of intrigue help transform our characters into complex, intriguing characters.

Show – Catch and Release

Nikolas Sutton

Role: Vigilante

Hidden agendas: He wants vengeance at all costs.

Competition: Not applicable (at this time)

Conspiracy: Relies on Brandon to help set up the targets through diversion

Secrets: Has kept his vigilante life from his girlfriend Sabrina and her family.

Deception: Although contradictory to his Christian values, he lies to Charlie to manipulate him.

Wound: The sudden death of his parents and siblings

Secret Identity: Maintains a Christian facade, but becomes addicted to life as a vigilante.

Brandon Leek

Role: Nik’s best friend

Hidden agendas: While he will not engage in the killing itself, he is certainly willing to help trap the targets.

Competition: Nik’s girlfriend accuses Brandon of being the reason that Nik is gone so much.

Conspiracy: He is basically Nik’s second set of eyes.

Secrets: Brandon is addicted to prescription pain medication.

Deception: He manipulates the targets to set them up for Nik.

Wound: His dad committed suicide last summer.

Secret Identity: He is a certified genius, but has shared this with nobody.

Charlie Anderson

Role: Former high school outcast who wants to emulate Nik

Hidden agendas: Not interested in the sport of it, he just wants to kill anyone who even appears guilty of a serious crime.

Competition: He is jealous of Brandon, Nik’s best friend.

Conspiracy: Not applicable (at this time)

Secrets: He adores Nik

Deception: He tells Sabrina that Nik is cheating on her

Wound: Due to his social awkwardness, he was repeatedly bullied in high school.

Secret Identity: Since high school, he has become a black belt in Jiu Jitsu

Bryson Volgard

Role: Brother of Nik’s first vigilante target; an enemy of Nik

Hidden agendas: To kill Nikolas Sutton

Competition: Not applicable (at this time)

Conspiracy: Has enlisted the help of a fellow Ranger

Secrets: He has promised his wife that he left his violent ways of his military life in the past.

Deception: He befriends Nik’s girlfriend, Sabrina, to gather intel on how to find Nik.

Wound: His brother was killed by Nik

Secret Identity: To his wife, he is a fishing guide.

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Lesson 3 – Assignment #1

Engaging Characters: Revenge

A: Role in the Show

Emily Thorne: Young, wealthy heiress who moved back to the Hamptons, her childhood home, to seek revenge for the framing and untimely death of her father.

Victoria Grayson: The matriarch of the wealthy Grayson family.

Nolan Ross: Billionaire and computer guru.

Jack Porter: Childhood friend of Emily who still lives in the Hamptons and owns a seaside bar.

B: Unique Purpose/Expertise

Emily: Purpose: To exact revenge on everyone responsible in the framing of her father for a crime he didn’t commit.

Victoria: Purpose: To protect her family against all threats. Irony: She is jealous and distrustful of her husband Conrad, who had an affair with her best friend, yet she had the affair with David Clarke years before.

Nolan: Expertise: Tech expert who assists Emily in her vengeful pursuits.

Jack: Purpose: To keep his family bar afloat. Also, is a source of great conflict for Emily, who still loves him, but cannot reveal herself.

C: Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface?

Emily: The most secretive of all, Emily is the alias for Amanda Clarke, a new resident whose sole purpose is to infiltrate and seek revenge:

Victoria: Although she stood by her husband and was complicit in the betrayal of David Clark, her heart is still broken. Her intuition tells her that she shouldn’t trust Emily.

Nolan: The wealthiest man in the Hamptons is quite insecure and wants to be accepted. He is in love with Emily.

Jack: Although not yet revealed, he is the one who either shot Daniel or found him at the very beginning of the show.

D: Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing?

Emily: Although she could stop short at just ruining the careers of her targets, she prefers to ruin their lives. She is also very fond of Daniel Grayson, despite her contempt for his parents.

Victoria: She will use anyone necessary to achieve her objectives.

Nolan: He just wants to treat people fairly and to be liked by others, but he is complicit in the revenge tactics of Emily, which go beyond his level of reasonableness.

Jack: This is a truly good guy, who has not yet revealed any moral issues being crossed.

E. Unpredictable: What will they do next?

Emily: Seemingly ruthless, she is garnering great pleasure at inflicting pain on her targets and seems capable of anything.

Victoria: She also is conniving and seemingly willing to do just about anything to protect her family.

Nolan: Tends to pop up at every event to see Emily, who has repeatedly told him to stay away. Will he compromise her mission?

Jack: He was willing to sell his most prized possession, his boat named after his childhood friend, to save his family’s bar.

F. Empathetic: Why do we care?

Emily: The betrayal of her father shattered her world as a child and still haunts her to this day.

Victoria: She loved David Clarke, albeit an apparent participant in his betrayal.

Nolan: An outcast who desperately wants to fit in.

Jack: A truly good guy.

Lesson 3 – Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Engaging Main Characters

What I learned doing this assignment is that not really knowing anything about my characters beforehand, this process is truly opening them up and revealing them to me as we go.

Show – Catch and Release

Journey – In the beginning, Nikolas Sutton is a naïve, devout Christian who always puts others first. Once he is faced with an incomprehensible loss with no remaining mechanism in place to bring justice, he is overpowered with a strong need for personal revenge. He tries to reconcile both his values and this overwhelming need for vengeance, but he ultimately loses this internal struggle and transforms into a competent hunter of human misfits.

A: Role in the Show

Nikolas Sutton: The vigilante and antihero who is on a personal quest to bring justice to all who have been wronged.

Bryson Volgard: The brother of one of Nik’s first vigilante targets, whose sole mission is to track down and kill Nik.

B: Unique Purpose/Expertise

Nikolas: Purpose: to avenge the murder of his family, initially, and then to similarly avenge similar crimes against others.

Bryson: Purpose: To avenge the death of his brother by Nik. Expertise: A dishonorably discharged special forces veteran. Irony: He has become a vigilante hunting his brother’s vigilante.

C: Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface?

Nikolas: This devout Christian begins to feel euphoria over his personal pursuit of justice.

Bryson: Was dishonorably charged from the military for using excessive and inhumane force upon his enemies.

D: Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing?

Nikolas: His whole mission contradicts his Christian values of the commandment to not commit murder, to turn the other cheek, and to serve his neighbor. Everything he does crosses his moral boundary.

Bryson: He vowed to his wife before they were married that he left his violent ways in the Middle East and would never return to them. He has a daughter who adores him as her hero.

E. Unpredictable: What will they do next?

Nikolas: Initially inept with a gun and tracking, as his competence increases, he rationalizes his actions as just steps in his sporting game, and his overwhelming desire to win leads to gruesome consequences.

Bryson: As in the military, he is still a wildcard who will pursue his target without regard to unintended carnage.

F. Empathetic: Why do we care?

Nikolas: Undeserved misfortune: lost his whole family in a senseless violent crime. Despite its questionable legality and unconventional approach, he is cleaning up society.

Bryson: Terrible childhood with a second chance at a good life with an amazing wife and loving daughter. We know he is risking it all by taking on this personal quest.

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.
• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.
• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong. Reason: Adding Assignment #2
• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.
• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Assignment #1

Three Circles of Characters

Show – Revenge

A: Main Characters Circle

Emily Thorne, Victoria Grayson, Nolan Ross, Jack Porter

B: Connected Circle

Bill Harmon (guest), Ashley Davenport, Conrad Grayson, Charlotte Grayson, Declan Porter, David Clarke (flashbacks), Lydia Davis (guest), Frank Stevens, head of Grayson security

C: Environmental Circle

Party guests, polo players, polo spectators, investment firm brokers and staff

Assignment #2

Marc Armstrong’s Three Circles of Characters

What I learned doing this assignment: I am much more creative with plot and storyline and much less adept at creating characters.

Show – Catch and Release

A: Main Characters Circle

Nikolas Sutton – At age 24, the vigilante and primary character of the show, is conflicted with his desire to pursue justice due to his Christian upbringing.

Brandon Leek – Nik’s best friend from high school, who is fiercely loyal to Nik and serves as his confidant, knows about Nik’s game but does not want to be directly involved.

Charlie Anderson – an outcast from high school with social quirks, who goes through a similar tragedy, witnesses Nik in action and wants to get involved.

Bryson Volgard – the brother of Nik’s first vigilante target, who is now committed to tracking down and killing Nik.

B: Connected Circle

Nik’s long-time girlfriend and her parents, Nik’s former football coach, county Sheriff, county deputy, Nik’s parents and siblings, episode target

C: Environmental Circle

News reporter, crime scene investigator, football players, refs and fans (flashback), video arcade patrons (flashback), people on the streets

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong. Reason: Adding Assignment #2 from Lesson 2 (to stick with the precedent started by others to match lesson # to Post Day #)
• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

As a fan of vigilantes and antiheroes, I watched the first episode of Revenge (a show I watched many years ago, but never before filtered for its binge-worthiness). What I learned doing this assignment is that what I previously considered as just a compelling story and an unexplained desire to watch the entire season/series, has now been more clearly defined for me as a Binge Worthy show with the introduction of the Five Star Points.

Five Star Points

Big Picture Hooks

From the opening scene with the apparent flashforward murder of Emily Thorne’s fiancé Daniel Grayson, this episode was written to hook the viewer. The big picture hook is how one woman, whose father was framed for treason and sentenced to prison, where he was killed, thus stealing his life and her childhood, seeks revenge upon those involved in his betrayal.

Amazing and Intriguing Characters

Emily Thorne is actually the alias of the former Amanda Clarke, who was encouraged by her father to always forgive, yet she takes the opposite path. She is an enigma as in one breath she purchases a $10K fundraiser ticket and then in the next she asks her friend to go out for cheap margaritas. Her willingness to sabotage and expose the affair of Conrad Grayson and Lydia Davis by posing as room service to poison his soup shows her willingness to exact revenge at all costs.

Nolan Ross, an associate of Emily’s father, is nervous and eccentric, who obviously has feelings for Emily and desperately wants to please her.

The Graysons are a dysfunctional wealthy family whose matriarch Victoria was Emily’s father’s love interest and his chief betrayer. She is capable of anything, especially as revealed when she coldly and publicly exiles Lydia from the Hamptons. She is distrustful and very guarded about Emily and Daniel’s relationship as she gives a speech at the engagement party with references to “fire and ice” and “beginnings and endings.”

Empathy / Distress

The viewer empathizes with Emily/Amanda as she reads her father’s letter intended only in the event of his premature passing. One also feels empathy as she meets her close childhood friend, Jack Porter, who does not recognize her. Jack also still owns her childhood dog, Sammy, who recognizes Emily/Amanda, but she is forced to suppress her feelings for both her dog and Jack to stay on task.

Layers / Open Loops

The opening flashforward shooting (and presumed murder) is left open and unresolved as Jack, a down-to-earth good guy, is seen dragging Daniel’s body with a look of remorse and Emily quickly brushes sand off her hand before being approached at her engagement party. There is more to this sub-story not yet revealed.

Jack Porter’s family bar is about to be foreclosed so he cancels a sailing trip and sells his beloved boat, named after his childhood friend Amanda Clarke, to help save the bar. While we assume this does save the bar from foreclosure, the story is left open.

The contrast between the hard-working Porter family and the wealthy Grayson family as Declan Porter and Charlotte Grayson fall for each other is an intriguing storyline with potential conflict.

Inviting Obsession

When Victoria publicly humiliates Lydia, it is clear that this woman is capable of anything and we cannot wait to see who is next to be the target of her scorn. Similarly, Emily’s trap set for Lydia and the way the episode closes with Emily crossing off Lydia’s picture from a group photo makes the viewer eager to see who is the next victim to be crossed off from this pictorial vengeance “road map.”

• This reply was modified 4 years, 2 months ago by  Marcus Armstrong. Reason: I needed to add what I learned from the assignment

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong’s Show Idea

Catch and Release

Episodic vs Serial: Serial

Plot Line: A Pro on a Mission in a Bigger World

Q. What makes this show unique?

Rather than outright kill his targets, a vigilante offers his captured criminals a sporting chance by releasing them only to hunt them down again. If they have eluded capture for ten days, he will forever let them go.

Q. What is the unique World it is set in?

A rapidly deteriorating United States with minimal police protection and rampant lawlessness.

Q. What is the major transformational journey my hero is going on?

A naïve and truly nice guy loses everyone dear to him in one needless act of criminal cowardice. A Christian who has always staunchly followed the biblical principle of turning the other cheek, as opposed to seeking revenge, is conflicted between his sense of justice and his morals. He rationalizes that one way to reconcile this conflict is to give the targets a slim fighting chance of survival. He realizes the truth of two popular clichés: Nice guys do finish last and the earthly life is a testing place, not a resting place.

Q. Who is the main character of the show and what makes him highly proactive?

Nikolas Sutton, a former star athlete, was raised in a Christian home and has always put others before himself. One night while running an errand, he comes home to find his mom, dad, two brothers and sister have all been murdered. Left alone and with a locally defunded and grossly undermanned police department, he is overcome by a foreign feeling of rage. His inner conflict caused by his values leads him to draw on the one thing he knows quite well, the spirit of competition, by levying punishment vigilante style, but with the twist that if they have evaded capture for ten days, he will forever let them go.

Q. Having to do with this idea, what haven’t we seen?

Bringing a sense of sport into the vigilante world.

Engaging and highly proactive hero…

Relatable: A young man who has always done the right thing by putting others first, obeying the law and treating everyone with respect.

Motivation: Has lost everything and all justice is gone in the world.

…up against a major conflict…

External: Risk of his own death by “playing” with the criminals rather than just killing them.

Internal: Overwhelming sense of seeking justice vs. Christian value of not meeting a wrong with another wrong.

…goes on unique transformational journey…

Start: Nikolas is well-adjusted and well-mannered, a product of his Christian upbringing. He would never wrong anyone and would go out of his way to help others.

Challenge: Nikolas has never before been tempted by such overpowering carnal desires as his desire to seek vengeance for the needless and ruthless murder of his family. By toying with his targets, he risks his own demise.

Finish: Once he catches and kills three of the four murderers of his family, Nikolas is hooked on this new way to combine justice and sport and begins to seek out other criminals for his human hunting game.

Unique: Vigilante with a sense of sport.

…into an intriguing sub-world.

A virtually lawless society.

SHORT PITCH

Nikolas Sutton, former star athlete and devout Christian, who is conflicted by his moral compass when he considers seeking vengeance for the murder of his family in a virtually lawless society, gives his targets one last chance to survive.

As noted by others, there isn’t a specific forum location into which we should post our show concept so I am doing it here.

• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.
• This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by  Marcus Armstrong.

[Marcus Armstrong]

Hello everyone,

My name is Marc Armstrong, I live in Las Vegas, am a CPA/consultant by day and am literally the least-experienced person in this room. I have written zero scripts so I may be taking a high school course without even having graduated from Kindergarten…but I am up for the challenge (anybody every get on an amusement park ride only to find out once you are strapped in that it is more of a thrill ride than you had hoped?). I hope to learn plot and character development, but in a Binge Worthy manner.

I was in the same Springfield, MO high school graduating class as Brad Pitt. Doesn’t do a thing for me, but it is a unique fun fact.

I look forward to learning from all of you.

Marc

[Marcus Armstrong]

Marcus Armstrong

I agree to the terms of this release form.

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the Binge Worthy TV class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, teaching a class, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the Binge Worthy TV available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. The easiest solution if you have similar ideas is to either not look at each other’s work or to agree to take your shows in different directions.

If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

This completes the Group Release Form for the Binge Worthy TV class.

[Marcus Armstrong]

I have done several classes and there has been less and less live involvement each time. Other than the overview marketing call to sign up for this course, there seems to no longer be anyone monitoring the support messages. I sent in a help ticket through customer service asking about the AI and I never got a response. I am extracting the lessons to keep for reference, but I am not sure I am going to continue in this Forum. Best success to you, Melanie!

Marc

[Marcus Armstrong]

Thanks Renee. Great advice and I will reflect on that. I am honestly still figuring it out as I go as I came into this class as a grass seed (seriously, I had no clue what I was going to do).

[Marcus Armstrong]

Hello Kari…love your intro. I, too, am in healthcare, albeit as a consultant working for a CPA firm. I am excited to see your new creation!

Marc

[Marcus Armstrong]

Hi Donna,

Now I feel old as it has been 30 years since I road motorcycles, flew airplanes and got scuba certified. At least I still shoot guns (actually just received my CCW in the mail this past week), I suppose. Nice to meet you.

Marc

[Marcus Armstrong]

Placerville?

[Marcus Armstrong]

Hilarious Molly! I am the other newbie in the group and I am also associated with healthcare, albeit in finance as opposed to patient care. Love your sense of humor…I too have been kicking the comedy tires with some recent stand-up. So for either of us to bypass writing articles or books and jump right into writing a TV script is also EPIC. I’m glad you are here to bring some levity to the process.