Megan Schemenauer
Forum Replies Created
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Finished the First Draft! 🎉
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Megan Filled In Missing Scenes!
What I learned doing this assignment is…that I’m much slower at revising than writing. During the first draft, I kept a running list of things I needed to add or change to keep from stopping myself during the drafting process. Now that I’ve been revising, I’m still only about halfway through my first read and revise list.
So far I’ve added two new scenes: one to show more of the antagonist’s backstory and one to further develop the protagonist’s relationship with her husband (which may or may not be essential).
I still feel like there’s a gap in Act 3, but I haven’t figured out yet how to fill it.
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Megan’s Act 4 Resolution
What I learned doing this assignment is…it’s possible to celebrate a finished script, even if it’s not perfect. At least now it exists, which is far more potential than it had a month ago!
Still loving the freedom that comes with losing perfectionism!
EXT. PARK DOWNTOWN D.C. — DAY
Months later. A press junket on a beautiful, sunny fall day. A packed crowd sits in chairs facing a makeshift platform. Media, paparazzi, and patriotic colors galore. Banners announcing the campaign slogan “True Equality for All.”
Nova Walker steps up onto the platform and crosses to the microphone to exuberant applause from a crowd of men and women.
NOVA
Good afternoon! Thank you for that. You’re so kind. I’m Nova Walker, and I know that for some time now, questions have been circling about my possible campaign for President, especially after the unexpected and tragic death of former President Bianca Harris. I’m here today to put an end to the speculation.
The crowd quiets.
NOVA
Today, I am officially announcing my intention to run for President.
The crowd erupts in cheers and applause. Nova holds up her hands.
NOVA
Before you get too excited, allow me to introduce my running mate. With her strong educational background in history and her passion for equality for all people, I am certain that this woman has exactly what it takes to keep us grounded in what made this country great to begin with. Please welcome Anna Fitzpatrick, my running mate for the vice presidency!
Dressed in a sharp suit, Anna steps onto the platform, waving confidently to the crowd. The crowd jumps to its feet, roaring its approval. Confetti cannons fire off. Nova takes Anna’s hand and raises it above their heads victoriously.
ANNA (V.O.)
I realize the fight is far from over. My father is still in the wind. We have a long way to go before true equality becomes a reality. But we’re finally taking a step in the right direction.
The camera pans to the front row where David stands, a BABY strapped to his chest in a sling. Luke stands on the chair beside his father, alternately waving to Anna and trying to catch the falling confetti.
ANNA (V.O.)
Population control was the first to go. And soon, other unjust laws will follow suit.
Anna steps off the platform and into the crowd, shaking the hands of both men and women, who all respond eagerly. She pauses to pose for pictures. Luke runs over to Anna and she sweeps him up in a hug.
ANNA (V.O.)
Hopefully by the time my sons Luke and Evan are old enough to attend college or choose a career, every last remnant of gender inequality will have disappeared. After all, why should life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness be limited by a random genetic selection of X’s or Y’s?
Grinning proudly, David and baby approach Anna and Luke. A camera flashes, capturing an image of the happy family. Perhaps, someday, the First Family?
THE END
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Megan’s Act 4 Climax
What I learned doing this assignment is…that the climax was the most difficult scene to write without wordsmithing. I wanted this final showdown between the protagonist and antagonist to be right. Satisfying. Exciting. Now that it’s finished, it still feels too talky, but I’m glad I pushed myself to just keep writing to get it down.
INT. WARD 71 PRESIDENTIAL SUITE — DAY
Anna enters. Bianca appears to be sleeping. Anna sets the flower arrangement on the floor by the door and crosses to Bianca’s bedside.
Anna takes in the sleeping President with all her wires and monitors. Then, she detaches the nurse’s call button.
Bianca stirs. Her eyes flutter open. Anna is staring back at her.
BIANCA
You. What are you doing here?
ANNA
Ostensibly, I’m here for a prenatal checkup. But I think you and I both know that’s a lie.
BIANCA
I meant, what are you doing here in my room.
Bianca reaches for the nurse’s call button but can’t find it.
BIANCA
My call button. What did you do with it??
ANNA
The Gender Disparity Act. How long has that little secret been going on?
BIANCA
Somebody get in here!
But with her injuries, Bianca’s hoarse voice doesn’t carry beyond the doorway.
ANNA
Don’t bother. He doesn’t work for you.
BIANCA
What do you want?
ANNA
Answers. The Gender Disparity Act. The murder of my mother and my baby brother.
BIANCA
I’m afraid I can’t help you. That would have been long before my incumbency. I had nothing to do with it.
ANNA
Oh, but that’s where you’re wrong. The Act may have been initiated before your presidency, but you had everything to do with it. See, that’s the thing about historians; we know how to dig up all kinds of dirt.
Anna pulls a folded piece of paper out of the pocket of her scrubs.
BEGIN Flashback:
The Women’s History Museum on Women’s Day. Anna is sitting at Jenny’s desk in her dark office, her face aglow in the light of the computer screen.
Her open laptop on the desk beside her shows the cue cards are already finished. Instead, Anna’s eyes frantically skim Jenny’s computer screen. Suddenly she stops, her eyes widening.
Anna hits print and grabs several sheets of paper from Jenny’s printer before picking up her laptop and leaving the office.
END FLASHBACK.
Anna opens the folded paper and reads aloud:
ANNA
“May 15, 2044. Senator Bianca Harris of California proposes Bill S. 3210 in regards to post-war population control in light of food rationing. May 31. The bill passes 73-27. June 6. Bill specifics retracted.”
Anna looks up at Bianca skeptically.
ANNA
Post-war population control? And yet somehow you got the majority of the Senate behind it.
BIANCA
The fear of starvation is an incredible motivator. Especially following a world war.
ANNA
And lucky for you there was no resistance from the White House with Daddy as President. But I do find myself wondering: Did he have any idea what he was signing? Or had his Alzheimer’s already begun to set in? At what point was he just another puppet for you to control?
Bianca bristles at the suggestion.
BIANCA
My father was an American hero. He brought this country through World War 3!
ANNA
And delivered it up on a silver platter right into the hands of the Matriarchy. Your hands.
Bianca sighs tiredly, for the first time looking her age.
BIANCA
What is it that you want, Anna? I can’t undo the past. I am simply working with the pieces that were left behind. Trying to rebuild a better world.
ANNA
A better world?! For whom? Not for my father or my brother. Not for my sons!
Anna lowers a protective hand to her belly. Bianca notices Anna’s gesture.
Bianca
Ah. So that’s what this is about. You would think by now I would know not to underestimate a mother’s love.
ANNA
You’ve allowed innocent lives to be taken! You’ve shut down dreams! You’re actively subjugating an entire gender!
BIANCA
Because they did it to us first! How many years did we have to fight for our rights? To work, to vote, to be seen as and treated as equals. How many women have been abused, mistreated, raped without justice? How many have been killed?!
ANNA
How can another wrong possibly make any of that right? As you already said, we can’t undo the past.
BIANCA
But I will make sure these things never happen again in the future. I’ll do whatever it takes.
ANNA
I’m afraid that won’t be an option anymore.
Anna takes the lanyard around her neck off. Attached is a small microphone pack. Anna plays back the President’s last words. Anna stops the recording.
ANNA
You may hold a lot of power. But there’s still a justice system in place that will be extremely interested in hearing this.
BIANCA
Are you actually threatening me? How dare you! Just who do you think you are?! You’re a nobody!
ANNA
Maybe. But this nobody will make sure that every media outlet in the country gets a copy of this tape.
Bianca attempts to pull herself upright, practically spitting fire.
BIANCA
Just try it. I will end you!
ANNA
I believe this interview is over.
Anna turns and walks back toward the door. Bianca hoarsely screams after her.
BIANCA
I will end you, do you hear me?? You, your father, your husband David—
ANNA
Good night, Madam President.
BIANCA
Your son Luke!
Anna freezes. Bianca smiles maliciously; she has gotten through to Anna.
BIANCA
Yes. Go ahead and share that tape with the world. And the moment you do, I’ll give the order to hunt down and kill that precious little boy of yours!
Anna hesitates by the door. She glances down at the flower arrangement on the floor. Bianca’s voice resumes its smooth, political tone, coaxing and manipulative.
BIANCA
Let’s be reasonable, Anna. It doesn’t have to be this way. We’re on the same side, you and I. Think of the good we could accomplish if we worked together!
Anna turns and walks back to the President’s bedside. She pointedly begins detaching wires from monitors.
ANNA
We may both be women. But we are not on the same side.
BIANCA
Stop! What are you doing?
ANNA
Rocking the boat.
Anna crosses back to the flower arrangement by the door. She picks it up and approaches the President, who eyes the flowers suspiciously.
BIANCA
Wait! Keep those away from me! I’m highly allergic!
ANNA
I’m just dropping these flowers off. They’re from your husband, the First Man?
Anna sets the flowers on the nightstand beside Bianca’s bed but just out of reach. Bianca is already beginning to gasp for breath as Anna turns and walks toward the door.
ANNA
Best wishes for a speedy recovery, Madam President.
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Megan’s Act 4 First Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is…adding a dilemma is crucial to the emotional impact of the climax. It can’t be an easy decision for the protagonist to face the antagonist. Something must be at stake. Something must be worth fighting for.
(Forgive the on-the-nose dialogue. 20% first draft)
INT. JAIL HOLDING CELL — DAY
Anna sits on the bench, her head resting in her hands. There is a metallic clang. Anna looks up. David stands outside the cell door, beside a FEMALE POLICE OFFICER.
DAVID
Anna.
ANNA
David!
Anna jumps to her feet and rushes to the door, placing her hands on the bars. David laces his fingers through hers.
POLICE OFFICER
You have ten minutes.
The officer leaves, the heavy metal door clanging shut behind him. David appears at a loss for words.
DAVID
What . . . How . . . Anna, what has been going on?? What have you gotten yourself into?!
ANNA
It’s a long story.
DAVID
Then give me the short version!
Now Anna appears at a loss for words. Finally, she blurts out
ANNA
I’m pregnant.
David’s face shifts from angry confusion to surprise and finally softens into amazement.
DAVID
Pregnant! Since when?! I mean, how long have you known? And why didn’t you tell me??
ANNA
It’s a boy.
DAVID
A boy! Anna, this is great news! I can’t believe you were keeping this big of a secret from me! But . . . what does it have to do with this terrorist group? How are your dad and Evan involved? How did YOU get involved??
Anna’s attempted distraction has failed. The last thing she wants to do is get David and Luke involved.
ANNA
Luke. Who’s watching Luke??
DAVID
Anna! Stop changing the subject! Why won’t you answer the question?!
Anna tightens her grip on David’s hands. She stares hard into his eyes, her voice barely a whisper.
ANNA
Not. Here. It isn’t safe.
She loosens her grasp. Louder, she repeats
ANNA
Who’s watching Luke?
David’s face has grown pale, a wash of fear and confusion.
DAVID
I asked Hunter next door to watch him for a few hours.
ANNA
Hunter already has his hands full with four girls, don’t you think? You should have called your parents.
DAVID
I wasn’t sure what was going on. I didn’t know how long I would be.
David’s eyes shift, searching for invisible cameras. He lowers his voice.
DAVID
Do I need to get you a lawyer?
Anna nods.
ANNA
And call your parents.
The outer door suddenly opens. The female police officer is back.
POLICE OFFICER
Time’s up.
DAVID
Has it been ten minutes already??
POLICE OFFICER
No. But we’ve since received orders to transfer her to the hospital for a checkup. Apparently, she’s pregnant.
DAVID
Yes. Yes, she is. Thank you. That’s really good of you.
POLICE OFFICER
Don’t thank me. Thank the Matriarchy. You’ll have to leave now.
DAVID
Oh. Sure. Of course.
David turns back to Anna.
DAVID
Honey, don’t worry about a thing. I’ll take care of it. All of it.
ANNA
I love you.
DAVID
Love you more.
The officer escorts David to the outer door and closes it behind him. She then returns, opens the cell door, and handcuffs Anna.
POLICE OFFICER
A pregnant woman wrapped up in an assassination attempt. Girl, what were you thinking??
Anna seems to be thinking aloud.
ANNA
What was I thinking?
As the officer leads her out of the cell to the outer door, Anna comes to a sudden stop with the realization.
ANNA
I was thinking that some things are worth fighting for.
The officer shakes her head skeptically as she jerks the outer door open.
POLICE OFFICER
Hope it was worth it.
INT. POLICE PRECINCT — DAY
The female officer is leading Anna down the hall when an emergency call comes in on her handheld radio.
EMERGENCY OPERATOR
Attention. Immediate officer presence requested at 1411 Hanover. Suspicion of narcotics and other illegal substances. Assume perpetrators are armed and dangerous.
POLICE OFFICER
Now?! You have got to be kidding me. It’s barely past noon! Aren’t all those druggies supposed to still be sleeping?
The female police officer glances around the precinct until her eyes fall on a YOUNG MALE BEAT COP, who is working on a report at his desk. She takes in his name tag: Officer Gallo.
POLICE OFFICER
Gallo!
Officer Gallo looks up quickly, as though he’s been caught doing something wrong.
GALLO
Yes?
POLICE OFFICER
New assignment. I need you to escort this young lady here to the hospital for a physical. You think you can handle that?
Officer Gallo leaps to his feet and takes Anna’s arm.
GALLO
Of course. On it! You can count on me.
POLICE OFFICER
I doubt it.
Without a backward glance, the police officer walks away, grabbing her walkie.
POLICE OFFICER
This is Officer Margo Hundt. On route to 1411 Hanover.
Gallo scoffs aloud.
GALLO
I miss all the action. Come on.
Gallo leads Anna out the front door of the precinct.
INT. POLICE CAR — DAY
Anna and Gallo sit at a standstill in the middle of traffic en route to the hospital. Gallo glances out the window at all the news cars and vans.
GALLO
What a circus. Her Majesty Madam Dictator gets a flesh wound and the entire world feels the need to report it.
ANNA
You don’t sound like you care for the president very much.
GALLO
Yeah, well, I guess I should do a better job covering that up. But I didn’t think I’d need to worry about that around you.
Gallo smiles at Anna in the rear view mirror. Anna relaxes somewhat. A call suddenly screeches through the radio. It’s Officer Hundt.
MARGO (O.S.)
Gallo? Come in, Gallo. Do you copy?
Gallo picks up the radio receiver.
GALLO
This is Gallo.
Margo
Gallo, I haven’t received confirmation yet that the suspect has been safely transferred. Where are you?!
GALLO
We’re still en route. Stuck in traffic. It’s a zoo down here.
MARGO
Well, turn on your lights and get her down there. Immediately. This is a high profile case.
GALLO
Copy.
Gallo hangs up the receiver. He scoffs under his breath.
GALLO
If it’s so high profile, why didn’t you take it?
He drums his fingers on the steering wheel but does not turn on his lights. He glances back at Anna again through the rear view mirror.
GALLO
It’s too bad you missed.
Gallo flips his lights on and the police car begins moving again.
INT. WALTER REED HOSPITAL LOBBY — DAY
Gallo fights through the media at the front door of the hospital and escorts Anna to the front desk. Seeing a uniformed officer and a woman in handcuffs, the NURSE jumps up.
GALLO
Good afternoon. I’ve got an Anna Fitzpatrick here for a prenatal checkup.
NURSE
Of course. We’ve been expecting her. Thank you. I can take her from here.
GALLO
Sorry, ma’am, but that’s a no can do. This woman here is a suspect in the assassination attempt and must therefore remain in police custody. I’m sure you understand.
The Nurse glances nervously at Anna.
NURSE
Oh. I see. Well, I’ve been told to take her directly to the third floor. Operating room 2.
GALLO
Operating room? For a prenatal checkup?
The Nurse shrugs.
NURSE
I just do what I’m told.
Gallo replies under his breath, only loud enough for Anna to hear.
GALLO
Of course you do. Lemming.
(Louder)
I’ll get her to the third floor.
The Nurse looks relieved.
NURSE
Okay. Thank you, Officer—?
GALLO
Hundt. Call me Hundt.
NURSE
Right.
Gallo leads Anna down the hallway toward a bank of elevators.
ANNA
Ummm, am I allowed to ask what’s going on?
GALLO
I don’t know what you’re talking about.
ANNA
Why didn’t you give her your real name?
Just before reaching the elevators, Gallo pulls Anna through a door leading to the stairs so suddenly, she doesn’t even have time to cry out.
INT. WALTER REED HOSPITAL STAIRWELL — DAY
A large MAN lurks in the stairwell, the same one who watched Anna leave the high school basketball game the other night.
He steps out of the shadows and Anna instantly recognizes the strong jawline and perfectly groomed head of hair.
Anna
You! You’re, you’re Edward Harris! The . . .
Edward
Go ahead. You can say it.
ANNA
The President’s husband!
Edward smiles sardonically.
EDWARD
I prefer the title “First Man.”
ANNA
First Man?! As in—?
Edward turns to Gallo.
EDWARD
I think you’re okay to release her now.
GALLO
You got it, Boss.
Gallo pulls the handcuff key from his pocket. He whispers to Anna as he unlocks the handcuffs.
GALLO
Eli says hi.
Rubbing her wrists, Anna turns to face Edward in confusion.
ANNA
I don’t understand. What’s going on? Do you have something to do with First Man?
EDWARD
Anna, I am First Man. Your father was only the front man.
Edward crosses to Anna and places a concerned hand on her shoulder.
EDWARD
I want you to know that I’m truly sorry about what’s happened to your brother. And your father. Believe me, we’re doing everything we can to find him.
ANNA
Why am I here?
EDWARD
I think you know why the Matriarchy sent you here. But I have another reason. Anna, what would you say to avenging your brother’s death? To finishing what he started?
Anna pales and looks from Edward to Gallo and back.
ANNA
You want me to assassinate the President?? Here? Now?!
EDWARD
The President is receiving treatment for her injuries in Ward 71. It’s completely locked down but of course, I can get you in.
ANNA
I can’t assassinate the President! I can’t!
Edward
No one ever wants to be the one to wield the sword of justice. But without the willingness to do battle, the innocent will continue to suffer.
ANNA
But I’m not a killer!
EDWARD
You don’t have to be. I only need you to be brave enough to fight.
GALLO
Think of your family, Anna. Aren’t some things worth fighting for?
Anna unconsciously puts a protective hand on her belly.
ANNA
Yes. Yes, there are.
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Megan’s Completed Act 3
What I learned doing this assignment is…that, after a quick skim of Act 3, I wasn’t sure what else to add. I’m finding it difficult to go back and revise at this point. I just want to keep pushing forward to the finish line.
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Megan’s Act 3 Turning Point
What I learned doing this assignment is…that the Act 3 turning point is the lowest low for the protagonist. At this point she has completely and utterly failed. It is okay to cause some serious pain for the protagonist. She will figure a way out of it!
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM — DAY
Camera flashes and applause from a packed-out audience. There is no sign of Bianca. Jenny steps up to the microphone on the platform as Anna stands in the back of the audience with her laptop to project the cue cards onto the back wall.
JENNY
Good afternoon. Welcome to the Women’s History Museum. Today we are celebrating not only a very special day but a very special guest. Please join me in welcoming the President of these United States, President Bianca Harris!
Bianca enters the main gallery from a side hallway, surrounded by Secret Service. She waves to the crowd as she approaches the microphone. Jenny shakes her hand vigorously before relinquishing the stage to Bianca.
BIANCA
Good afternoon. Happy Women’s Day!
Bianca pauses for the cheer of approval from the predominantly female crowd.
BIANCA
It’s strange to think how far we’ve come in what feels like so little time. Through war, recovery, and now this season of celebrating. We have finally become a flourishing society again thanks to the Matriarchy!
Bianca pauses again for the cheering crowd.
BIANCA
You know, recently I was questioned about whether or not I should run for reelection. I admit, five terms is a long time and it can begin to take a toll on a person’s health.
The crowd has grown quiet in concern. In the back of the room, Bianca’s speech appears on Anna’s laptop screen one slide at a time and then is projected onto the back wall, giving Anna a few seconds to skim what Bianca will say before she says it.
BIANCA
But then, I remember my girls Sophie and Serena, who are in the audience with us today.
The television camera pans SOPHIE and SERENA, two tall, athletic teenage girls sitting in the front row. They smile. Serena waves.
BIANCA
I think of the system and why this works so well: women supporting women. Something we rarely saw in the previous male-dominated society fueled by competition, greed, and the desire to succeed at all costs. What we have now works. The Matriarchy works.
Once again the crowd cheers even more loudly. Bianca smiles and waits for silence to fall. Anna skims the next slide on her laptop and gasps.
BIANCA
Unfortunately, this truth is not yet evident to all. At this moment, there lurks in this very city a group known as First Man. It is their intention to turn back time, to hunt us down, to force us back into subjugation.
The crowd mimics Anna’s surprise.
BIANCA
But I am neither ready nor willing to go back! We have suffered enough. We have worked too hard. We will not submit.
Bianca glances toward a female SECRET SERVICE agent waiting at the foot of the platform. The agent nods and heads to the hallway.
Anna glances at her laptop screen in confusion. There are no more cue cards.
BIANCA
The Matriarchy works because it is run by women. And it works on all levels. Allow me to introduce to you the notorious leader of First Man, Adam Fitzgerald.
The crowd explodes in a buzz of conversation as two burly Secret Service women lead a gagged and handcuffed Adam up onto the platform. He is scanning the room, clearly looking for Anna. Anna covers her mouth with both hands to keep from crying out.
BIANCA
If this were a male-dominated democracy, Adam here would currently be undergoing some sort of physical torture to make him reveal the whereabouts of his companions. But in the Matriarchy, we use our intelligence not violence to accomplish our goals. These nests of male dissenters have already been uncovered and are being raided as I speak. Why? Because the Matriarchy works. A government led by women works because women govern with heart and head.
The report of a gun suddenly explodes from a vent in the back of the room, just over Anna’s head. Bianca is struck in the left shoulder, the bullet narrowly missing her heart.
Several Secret Service agents immediately swarm the stage, throwing their bodies over the wounded President. Another points in the direction of the vent.
SECRET SERVICE AGENT
There! Up there!
Four or five Secret Service agents take aim and begin firing at the vent, the wall, the ceiling. Chunks of the building shower down. Anna dives out of harm’s way.
The crowd screams and flees at the sound of raining bullets. In the ensuing chaos, Adam runs for an exit.
Suddenly, Evan falls through the grate and lands with a thud on the debris-strewn floor below, his body riddled with holes. A horrified Anna rushes to her brother’s body.
ANNA
Evan! Evan!!
The Secret Service agent pushes her way through the crowd and grabs Anna by the arm, dragging her to her feet.
SECRET SERVICE AGENT
You’re under arrest for conspiracy in the attempted assassination of the President. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney—
The Secret Service agent drags Anna off. Anna’s eyes never leave Evan’s body.
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Megan’s Act 3 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is… after the Act 2 turning point, there needs to be a new plan in place, something that seems like it might actually work at first, something that pushes the protagonist out of their comfort zone. I’m excited to write the next turning point!
EXT. HIGH SCHOOL PARKING LOT — NIGHT
Noises from the game still float out behind her as Anna exits the school into the parking lot.
As she walks toward her car, she suddenly stops, hearing a noise. But when she turns around, she sees nothing.
Anna resumes walking. With a shaky hand, Anna pulls her cell phone out of her purse and quickly dials. Evan’s face appears on the screen.
EVAN
Hey, Anna Banana. What’s up? Where are you?
ANNA
Evan! I think someone is following me!
EVAN
Hey. Are you at the girls high school??
ANNA
Evan, focus! Did Adam send someone out after me again? Am I about to have a bag thrown over my head??
EVAN
Jeez, relax. No one is following you. Stop being so paranoid. And you know, maybe if you stopped calling him Adam, the two of you would have a better relationship.
Anna has reached her car. Casting a glance over her shoulder, she yanks open the door and slides into the driver’s seat.
ANNA
Yeah? Well, you know what else would help the relationship? Not sending stalkers out after me.
Anna starts the car, places the phone on the passenger seat, and pulls out of the parking spot.
As she exits the lot, a large MALE FIGURE steps out of the shadows and watches her go.
INT. OVAL OFFICE— DAY
Bianca is sitting at the desk behind a laptop when Nova enters.
NOVA
You asked to see me?
Bianca slams the laptop shut aggressively and stands.
BIANCA
Yes. Do you have any idea what is going on right under our noses? Right here in this very city??
Bianca shoves a paper from intelligence into Nova’s hand. Nova quickly skims it.
NOVA
First Man? What sort of name is that? Honestly, Bianca. You don’t seriously consider this group to be a credible threat?
BIANCA
A male resistance group is always a credible threat, regardless of whatever inane title it goes by! I want them found and quashed. Immediately!
Nova places the brief on the desk.
NOVA
Of course. And it looks like intelligence is already on it.
BIANCA
I’m only looking out for the best interests of our country. Why can’t they see that??
NOVA
To be fair, Bianca, some of your more recent policies have been decidedly misandrist. Repealing compulsory education for boys? The forced estrogen vaccinations? And don’t think I haven’t heard about your method for population control. With all of these rebellions and the upcoming elections, I can’t help but wonder. Perhaps it’s time to consider stepping down.
BIANCA
Stepping down?? After everything I’ve accomplished? After all that I’ve sacrificed? You must be out of your mind!
NOVA
Twenty years, Bianca. Isn’t that enough?
Bianca coolly moves back to the desk and sits.
BIANCA
I’ll be announcing my intention to run this afternoon. You have a few days to decide if you still want to be on the ticket. That’s all.
NOVA
Bianca, can’t we talk about this?
BIANCA
That all.
Bianca resumes work on her laptop. Nova sighs in exasperation and exits the office.
INT. ANNA’S LIVING ROOM — DAY
The news drones on the mounted flat screen, but Anna is no longer watching. She sits on the sofa, lost in thought.
David enters, holding Luke.
DAVID
Hey. You’re still here. Everything okay?
ANNA
Yeah, I’m fine. Where are you two off to?
David holds up a canvas bag.
DAVID
Groceries. Luke has put a serious hurting on the yogurt around here. If I don’t get more, I’m afraid he’s going to rebel.
Luke
Go-gurt!
DAVID
See?
Anna smiles at the two of them wistfully.
ANNA
If you’ve just running to the store, you can leave Luke here.
DAVID
Don’t you have to leave for work?
ANNA
I’m going in a little later today.
David turns to Luke.
DAVID
What do you say, kid? Want to stay home with Mommy for a little bit?
Luke reaches for Anna.
LUKE
Mommy!
David sets Luke down. Luke runs over between Anna’s knees and puts his head on her lap.
DAVID
Okay, you two. I’ll be back.
He pauses and looks back at Anna.
DAVID
You’re sure you’re okay with this?
ANNA
Am I okay with watching my son? Of course! Take your time. Stop and get a beer if you want.
DAVID
(Joking)
Right. A beer. At nine o’clock on. Wednesday. Because that’s what Dads do.
David shakes his head, laughing, and leaves. Anna strokes the top of Luke’s head thoughtful. She whispers in his ear.
ANNA
Hey, Luke. You wanna know a secret?
Luke looks up expectantly.
ANNA
Mommy’s going to have a baby!
Luke cocks his head and studies her.
LUKE
No!
Anna grabs Luke and begins to tickle him playfully. Luke squeals in laughter.
ANNA
What do you mean, no? Mommy’s going to have a baby! And there’s nothing you or anyone else can do to stop it!
With a smile, Anna releases the squirming Luke. He immediately runs toward the canvas toy bins in the corner.
Anna watches him for a moment. Suddenly, the news on the screen catches her attention. Bianca is standing on a platform smiling and waving to an applauding crowd.
News Anchor
You heard it right here, folks. It’s official. President Bianca Harris will indeed be running in the upcoming election, seeking a historic sixth term as president.
Anna’s eyes follow the President, completely oblivious to the fact that Luke has dumped every last toy bin all over the floor.
Anna takes out her cellphone and dials. After a few rings, Adam picks up.
ADAM (O.S.)
Hello?
ANNA
Adam? I’m in.
-
Megan’s Act 3 Reaction to Midpoint
What I learned doing this assignment is… birthday week is not conducive to finding time to write! I’m happy with the outcome of this scene, though, just not the pace it took me to write it. And I finally got meek, rule-following Anna to tell a lie. To the president, no less. It was also fun to finally have my protagonist and antagonist meet.
INT. HOSPITAL HALLWAY — DAY
Anna runs down the hallway barefoot in a hospital gown. NURSES and HOSPITAL STAFF give her strange looks as she passes.
Seeing their expressions, Anna slows. She notices a closet and ducks inside.
INT. JANITOR’S CLOSER — DAY
Anna stumbles and nearly trips on something in the dark closet. She flips on a light. It’s a mop and mop bucket. Anna’s eyes light up.
ANNA
Evan!
Anna digs through her bag for her cell phone.
ANNA
Of course I couldn’t grab my clothes before running out.
Anna pulls out her phone and dials Evan. He answers on the third ring.
EVAN (O.S.)
Hello?
ANNA
Evan! It’s Anna!
EVAN (O.S.)
What’s wrong? You sound off.
ANNA
I need you to come and get me. I’m in the hospital.
EVAN (O.S.)
Oh my God! Are you okay??
ANNA
I’m okay, but I want you to take me back to First Man.
EVAN (O.S.)
Seriously? I thought you didn’t want to have anything to do with—
ANNA
Just come quickly, okay?
EVAN (O.S.)
Okay. I’m on my way.
ANNA
And bring clothes!
INT. FIRST MAN HQ — DAY
Anna follows Evan into First Man, clearly wearing some of Evan’s clothes. Adam jumps up as soon as he sees them.
ADAM
Anna! Are you okay? Did they hurt you?
Adam surprises Anna by suddenly giving her a protective hug. The other men in HQ slowly filter out of the room, giving them privacy.
Before he exits, Evan meets Anna’s eyes and mouths the words “Listen to him.”
Adam releases Anna.
ADAM
What happened? You’re pregnant again, aren’t you?
ANNA
Yes. Wait, how did you know?
ADAM
Let me guess. It’s a boy.
ANNA
Yes! Did you know about this Gender Disparity thing?!
ADAM
Yes.
ANNA
How??
Adam gestures to a chair.
ADAM
Maybe you should take a seat. I owe you some answers. About your mother.
ANNA
NOW you want to talk about Mom? After everything I just went through?!
ADAM
That’s exactly why I have to tell you.
Anna drops into a chair but Adam paces restlessly.
ADAM
Maybe you’re wondering how I first got involved with First Man.
ANNA
What does this have to do with Mom?
ADAM
I’m getting there. You should know that First Man isn’t some back water grass roots organization. There’s an entire network of these pockets of resistance all across the country. So far we’ve eluded detection, but I’m afraid it’s only a matter of time.
ANNA
Any chance of you getting to the point sometime soon, Adam?
Adam smiles ruefully.
ADAM
Adam. You know, once upon a time you used to call me Dad.
ANNA
And once upon a time Mom was still alive and we were a happy family. But all fairytales have to end eventually.
ADAM
Yes. They do.
Adam runs a hand across his stubble of beard, clearly uncomfortable.
ADAM
Man, this is worse than the time I had to admit to you and Evan that there isn’t really a Santa Claus.
ANNA
Just tell me already. Clearly Evan already knows. I don’t know why it should be so much harder telling me—
ADAM
Your mother didn’t die by accident. She was killed.
ANNA
Yeah, I know. By a drunk driver.
ADAM
No. There was no car accident. No drunk driver.
ANNA
Then how—
ADAM
You wanted to know how I knew about the Gender Disparity Act. We found out about it when your mother got pregnant the second time.
ANNA
Second time? You mean after Evan and I—?
ADAM
Anna, you had a younger brother. His name was Liam.
Anna freezes.
ANNA
Liam?
ADAM
Do you remember him? You and Evan were so young. Not even three years old.
ANNA
What happened to him? What happened to Mom??
ADAM
The same thing that almost happened to you. They found out your mother was having another boy, and they tried to force her to abort. She fled. We hid her for months by moving around from one friend to another, never staying in one place too long. Your little brother was born right in Uncle Jimmy’s basement in Iowa. Do you remind that?
ANNA
I . . . I remember Iowa, I think. Evan and I had to share a room.
ADAM
And a bed. We all did. Jimmy didn’t have much.
ANNA
What happened to Mom?
But Adam seems lost in the memories.
ADAM
We thought we’d have to live like that for the rest of our lives, on the run. Always afraid.
ANNA
Adam! What happened to Mom?
Adam turns to Anna and his expression is ice, his voice leaden from years of pain and loss.
ADAM
What do you think happened? She wouldn’t terminate the pregnancy, so they ferreted her out and killed them both.
ANNA
Who did?!
ADAM
You already know the answer to that question.
Adam drops into a chair, spent.
ANNA
You can’t seriously believe that President Harris would ever condone such a outrageous law!
ADAM
She doesn’t just condone it; she created it. Forced it through the system without any approval from Congress. Half of those old biddies probably don’t even know the law exists.
Now Anna is the one who jumps out of her seat and begins pacing.
ANNA
There must be something we can do!
ADAM
There is. But we need your help.
Adam levels a piercing gaze at Anna.
ADAM
We’re going to take out the President.
ANNA
Do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds??
ADAM
Yes. Just as ridiculous as a Gender Disparity Act.
Anna’s hands immediately drop to her belly protectively. After a minute’s thought, she meet’s Adam stare.
ANNA
Okay. I’ll do it. I’ll help you depose the President.
ADAM
You will??
ANNA
But we’re first going to try to do it peaceably.
ADAM
She’s never going to go down without a fight, Anna.
ANNA
I don’t mind a fight. But I’m not going down in history with the likes of John Wilkes Booth and Lee Harvey Oswald as someone who assassinated a President. No matter how corrupt. Let me at least look for a better way.
ADAM
There is no better way, Anna. You’ll see that eventually. I just hope you do before it’s too late.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL GYMNASIUM — NIGHT
Anna enters an enormous high school gymnasium to the sound of a buzzer, a bouncing basketball, cheering fans, and two competing sets of cheerleader voices.
The girls’ basketball game is well underway as Anna scans the bleachers of the home section. President Bianca Harris sits front and center, surrounded by several members of the SECRET SERVICE.
Bianca stands and cheers loudly as her daughter SOPHIE sinks a shot on the court.
Anna weaves her way through the crowd toward the bleachers, but before she is within 20 feet of the President, Maura accosts her.
MAURA
Hello. Can I help you?
ANNA
Uh, yes. My name is Anna Fitzgerald, and I’m on staff at the Women’s History Museum downtown. I just have a few questions for the President about the upcoming Women’s Day event we’re hosting.
MAURA
I’m sorry, but you’ll have to schedule an appointment. The President is not available to answer any questions at this time.
The buzzer sounds. Anna glances up at the clock. Five seconds remain until the half. When Anna looks back, Bianca is staring steadily at her. Bianca says something to a Secret Service member, and he gestures at Maura to allow Anna to pass.
The start of halftime buzzer sounds as Anna steps up to the President, who rises to meet her.
Bianca
I’m at my daughter’s high school basketball game. I don’t know whether to admire or be annoyed by your temerity.
Anna holds out a nervous hand.
ANNA
Anna Fitzgerald from the Women’s History Museum. Thank you for seeing me.
BIANCA
Ah, yes. Is this in regards to our upcoming speaking engagement? I assure you, I’ve been practicing.
Anna smiles tightly.
ANNA
We’re actually looking to put together a program for the event and we could use some additional information.
BIANCA
Lucky for you it’s halftime. You’ve got ten minutes.
Bianca primly takes a seat on the bleachers, crossing her legs.
Anna glances up at the clock ticking down on the scoreboard and hesitantly sits beside Bianca pulling out a notepad and pen.
ANNA
In your own words, would you give us the history of Women’s Day?
BIANCA
You’re the historian. Shouldn’t you already know all this?
ANNA
We were hoping to get a quote from you. We figured it would be more powerful coming from the woman who started it all.
BIANCA
Yes, you’re probably right. Hard to believe February 14 used to be a day for celebrating couples. As if any woman needs to be part of a couple to obtain a sense of worth! No. The holiday is much more practical now that it’s been rebranded as “Women’s Day.”
ANNA
Have you ever had any men ask why there isn’t an equivalent Men’s Day?
Bianca stares at Anna blankly for a moment.
BIANCA
Of course not. Why would they need their own day? Don’t be ridiculous. Next question.
ANNA
Umm, okay. I’m sure people have begun wondering if you are planning on running again in the next election.
BIANCA
Nothing has been announced officially, but I see no harm in sharing. Yes, I am planning on running for a sixth consecutive term. With all the positive contributions this administration has been able to make in the last two decades, I don’t see why not.
ANNA
Wow. Two decades. I still remember when you pushed through the repeal of the Twenty-second Amendment. I was in high school. Taking a Government class, no less. My teacher adored you. She said you were making history. We watched the news almost every day in that class. Actually, I think that’s when I first realized I wanted to be a historian.
Bianca pulls out her cell phone and checks the time.
BIANCA
So this is how you want to spend the final minutes of this interview? Taking a trip down memory lane?
Anna shakes herself out of her reverie with a glance at the time remaining on the scoreboard: 6:20.
ANNA
Sorry. Where were we? Oh. The Twenty-second Amendment. Was there any backlash in the decision to repeal?
BIANCA
None whatsoever. Repealing the amendment allowed me to stay in office. People don’t actually want change. They want stability. That’s something that I can give them.
ANNA
Will you still be campaigning with the same slogan you began five elections ago: Truth. Justice. Equality?
BIANCA
It’s got a nice ring to it, doesn’t it? And it’s gotten me re-elected so far each time. So why rock the boat?
The familiar phrase catches Anna’s attention.
ANNA
Excuse me? What did you just say?
BIANCA
I said, why rock the boat?
ANNA
Right. Would you say you’ve lived up to the words of your campaign slogan?
Bianca studies Anna, weighing how much to reveal.
BIANCA
Anna . . . may I call you Anna?
ANNA
Of course.
BIANCA
We’re both intelligent women. I want you to consider those words again. Truth. What is truth? You’re a historian. Doesn’t truth become whatever you declare is true and then record in the pages of history? Justice. True justice is a double-edged sword. The one who wields it risks getting cut herself. Tell me, what wisdom is there in that? As for Equality . . .
Bianca looks around at the female players warming up on the court, at the female referees, at the predominantly female crowd.
BIANCA
I would say under my tenure we as women have finally achieved real equality.
ANNA
And the men?
Bianca levels her piercing gaze on Anna.
BIANCA
What about them?
ANNA
I don’t understand. I know you don’t have any sons, but you have a husband. Doesn’t it bother you to see . . .
BIANCA
What? That for the first time in modern society, women are the dominant gender? It’s about time. And as far as my husband goes, he supports whatever I tell him to.
Bianca smiles wryly at Anna.
BIANCA
Not all of us marry for love.
The buzzer blares, ending halftime.
BIANCA
And that brings us to the end of the interview. But I’m sure we’ll meet again. At the event next week.
Bianca turns her attention back to the court as the players return.
ANNA
Thank you for your time, Madam President.
Anna turns to leave.
BIANCA
Congratulations, by the way.
Anna stops and looks back at Bianca, whose eyes never leave the court.
ANNA
I’m sorry?
BIANCA
On your pregnancy. You must be, what, three, four months along?
Anna instinctively raises a protective hand to her stomach.
ANNA
No, you’re— I’m sorry. You’re mistaken. I’m not pregnant.
Bianca simply raises her eyebrows, her eyes never leaving the players on the court. Anna drops her hand, quickly turns, and walks away.
-
Megan’s Has Completed Act 2 Draft 1
What I learned doing this assignment is…that even when life is busy, if I make writing a priority, I can always find a few minutes to squeeze it in. Today’s Zoom meeting encouraged me to keep moving forward; even a little progress is progress!
I’m already leaving myself notes on future scenes to add or details to change but I’m holding off until after I get the first draft finished before going backward.
INT. HOSPITAL HALLWAY — DAY
Anna runs down the hallway barefoot in a hospital gown. NURSES and HOSPITAL STAFF give her strange looks as she passes.
Seeing their expressions, Anna slows. She notices a closet and ducks inside.
INT. JANITOR’S CLOSER — DAY
Anna stumbles and nearly trips on something in the dark closet. She flips on a light. It’s a mop and mop bucket. Anna’s eyes light up.
ANNA
Evan!
Anna digs through her bag for her cell phone.
ANNA
Of course I couldn’t grab my clothes before running out.
Anna pulls out her phone and dials Evan. He answers on the third ring.
EVAN (O.S.)
Hello?
ANNA
Evan! It’s Anna!
EVAN (O.S.)
What’s wrong? You sound off.
ANNA
I need you to come and get me. I’m in the hospital.
EVAN (O.S.)
Oh my God! Are you okay??
ANNA
I’m okay, but I want you to take me back to First Man.
EVAN (O.S.)
Seriously? I thought you didn’t want to have anything to do with—
ANNA
Just come quickly, okay?
EVAN (O.S.)
Okay. I’m on my way.
ANNA
And bring clothes!
INT. FIRST MAN HQ — DAY
Anna follows Evan into First Man, clearly wearing some of Evan’s clothes. Adam jumps up as soon as he sees them.
ADAM
Anna! Are you okay? Did they hurt you?
Adam surprises Anna by suddenly giving her a protective hug. The other men in HQ slowly filter out of the room, giving them privacy.
Before he exits, Evan meets Anna’s eyes and mouths the words “Listen to him.”
Adam releases Anna.
ADAM
What happened? You’re pregnant again, aren’t you?
ANNA
Yes. Wait, how did you know?
ADAM
Let me guess. It’s a boy.
ANNA
Yes! Did you know about this Gender Disparity thing?!
ADAM
Yes.
ANNA
How??
Adam gestures to a chair.
ADAM
Maybe you should take a seat. I owe you some answers. About your mother.
ANNA
NOW you want to talk about Mom? After everything I just went through?!
ADAM
That’s exactly why I have to tell you.
Anna drops into a chair but Adam paces restlessly.
ADAM
Maybe you’re wondering how I first got involved with First Man.
ANNA
What does this have to do with Mom?
ADAM
I’m getting there. You should know that First Man isn’t some back water grass roots organization. There’s an entire network of these pockets of resistance all across the country. So far we’ve eluded detection, but I’m afraid it’s only a matter of time.
ANNA
Any chance of you getting to the point sometime soon, Adam?
Adam smiles ruefully.
ADAM
Adam. You know, once upon a time you used to call me Dad.
ANNA
And once upon a time Mom was still alive and we were a happy family. But all fairytales have to end eventually.
ADAM
Yes. They do.
Adam runs a hand across his stubble of beard, clearly uncomfortable.
ADAM
Man, this is worse than the time I had to admit to you and Evan that there isn’t really a Santa Claus.
ANNA
Just tell me already. Clearly Evan already knows. I don’t know why it should be so much harder telling me—
ADAM
Your mother didn’t die by accident. She was killed.
ANNA
Yeah, I know. By a drunk driver.
ADAM
No. There was no car accident. No drunk driver.
ANNA
Then how—
ADAM
You wanted to know how I knew about the Gender Disparity Act. We found out about it when your mother got pregnant the second time.
ANNA
Second time? You mean after Evan and I—?
ADAM
Anna, you had a younger brother. His name was Liam.
Anna freezes.
ANNA
Liam?
ADAM
Do you remember him? You and Evan were so young. Not even three years old.
ANNA
What happened to him? What happened to Mom??
ADAM
The same thing that almost happened to you. They found out your mother was having another boy, and they tried to force her to abort. She fled. We hid her for months by moving around from one friend to another, never staying in one place too long. Your little brother was born right in Uncle Jimmy’s basement in Iowa. Do you remind that?
ANNA
I . . . I remember Iowa, I think. Evan and I had to share a room.
ADAM
And a bed. We all did. Jimmy didn’t have much.
ANNA
What happened to Mom?
But Adam seems lost in the memories.
ADAM
We thought we’d have to live like that for the rest of our lives, on the run. Always afraid.
ANNA
Adam! What happened to Mom?
Adam turns to Anna and his expression is ice, his voice leaden from years of pain and loss.
ADAM
What do you think happened? She wouldn’t terminate the pregnancy, so they ferreted her out and killed them both.
ANNA
Who did?!
ADAM
You already know the answer to that question.
Adam drops into a chair, spent.
ANNA
You can’t seriously believe that President Harris would ever condone such a outrageous law!
ADAM
She doesn’t just condone it; she created it. Forced it through the system without any approval from Congress. Half of those old biddies probably don’t even know the law exists.
Now Anna is the one who jumps out of her seat and begins pacing.
ANNA
There must be something we can do!
ADAM
There is. But we need your help.
Adam levels a piercing gaze at Anna.
ADAM
We’re going to take out the President.
ANNA
Do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds??
ADAM
Yes. Just as ridiculous as a Gender Disparity Act.
Anna’s hands immediately drop to her belly protectively. After a minute’s thought, she meet’s Adam stare.
ANNA
Okay. I’ll do it. I’ll help you depose the President.
ADAM
You will??
ANNA
But we’re first going to try to do it peaceably.
ADAM
She’s never going to go down without a fight, Anna.
ANNA
I don’t mind a fight. But I’m not going down in history with the likes of John Wilkes Booth and Lee Harvey Oswald as someone who assassinated a President. No matter how corrupt. Let me at least look for a better way.
ADAM
There is no better way, Anna. You’ll see that eventually. I just hope you do before it’s too late.
-
Megan’s Act 2 TP – Midpoint
What I learned doing this assignment is… that even though I’m following a beat sheet and have an outline, some minor details may still change as I’m writing. I’m glad to see that sticking to an outline hasn’t seemed to shut down my creativity.
INT. ULTRASOUND ROOM — DAY
Anna is wearing a medical gown lying back on a paper-covered medical table. TESSA, a fit 28-year-old ultrasound technician, squirts petroleum jelly onto Anna’s belly.
TESSA
So is this your first?
ANNA
Thankfully, no. I’ve done this all before. I have a two-year-old at home.
TESSA
That’s great! Boy or girl?
ANNA
Boy. His name is Luke.
TESSA
Aww, Luke! So are you hoping for a girl this time?
ANNA
Honestly, I don’t really have a preference. So long as the baby is healthy.
TESSA
Well let’s find out then, okay?
Tessa places the ultrasound probe on Anna’s bare belly. An image appears on the screen beside Anna’s head.
TESSA
Give me one second . . . There! There’s baby.
Anna nervously scrutinized the tiny fetus on the screen while Tessa expertly takes digital measurements.
TESSA
Head circumference, good. Abdominal circumference. There’s the femur. Your baby is extremely cooperative!
ANNA
I guess that’s a good thing.
TESSA
Based on these measurements, I’d say we’re looking at 21 weeks.
ANNA
21 weeks!? Really?
TESSA
That or you’re having a really big baby! Let’s see. I see ten fingers and—5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10–ten toes. Now how about we find out what you are?
Staring at the screen, Tessa moves the ultrasound probe around on Anna’s belly. Suddenly, she stops.
TESSA
Oh. That’s unfortunate.
ANNA
What?! Is something wrong with the baby?
Tessa sets down the probe on the counter.
TESSA
I’m sorry. Give me just a minute.
To Anna’s horror, Tessa slips out of the room. Anna looks back to the monitor, frantically studying it for clues.
Tessa reenters, a heavyset NURSE behind her.
ANNA
What is it? What’s going on?
The Nurse lumbers over to Anna’s side while Tessa moves toward the medicine cabinet.
TESSA
We know the gender.
ANNA
We do??
TESSA
It’s a boy.
ANNA
A boy.
Anna looks back at the screen, entranced by the tiny image.
ANNA
A younger brother for Luke.
TESSA
Well, yes and no.
Anna’s head swivels to Tessa.
ANNA
What do you mean?
TESSA
Gender Disparity Act. Male children are limited to one per household.
When Tessa turns around, she is holding a syringe. Anna’s eyes widen.
ANNA
What does that mean?
TESSA
It means we need to terminate the pregnancy.
Anna moves to jump off the table but the Nurse beside her grabs her by the shoulders and holds her down.
TESSA
I’m sorry. I don’t like it either, but it’s the law. They’ll prosecute both me and you if we don’t.
ANNA
Who will??
TESSA
Who do you think? The Matriarchy.
Tessa crosses to Anna with the syringe.
TESSA
Look, I promise to make this as quick and painless as possible. When you wake up, you won’t even remember it happened.
ANNA
No!
As Tess brings the syringe down toward Anna’s arm, Anna pulls the Nurse in toward her as a shield. The unexpected movement sends the syringe into the Nurse’s arm.
TESSA
Oh! Susan! I’m sorry!
The stunned Nurse passes out onto the floor.
Anna jumps off the table, pushing past Tessa as she races to the door.
TESSA
Anna! Stop!
Tessa attempts to grab Anna, but Anna yanks the door open, slamming it into Tessa’s face. Tessa howls in pain.
Anna slips out of the room, barely managing to clasp the back of her hospital gown closed. Tessa’s shouts follow Anna down the hall.
TESSA (O.S.)
Come back! Somebody stop her!
-
Megan’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I seem to be getting better at looking at scenes for their beginning, middle, and end. I find myself more able to move, combine, and redistribute scenes, fluidly using the beat sheet. I am enjoying the feeling of competency.
I feel like I was able to accomplish Key Scene 2: Protagonist takes on a plan and executes it. I’m not sure about Key Scene 3: Not only does their plan fail, but . . . While I did have the plan fail, I am still looking for a way to amp up the stakes for the “but.”
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM — DAY
Anna walks into the museum carrying the two coffees. Kara makes a beeline for the coffee.
KARA
Thank you! You are a lifesaver!
ANNA
Not a problem.
Kara glances at Anna as she sips her coffee.
KARA
What’s wrong with your face?
ANNA
I’m talking to Jenny today about the open research position.
KARA
You want to move into research?
ANNA
Not for me. For Evan.
KARA
Evan? You mean, the janitor Evan?
ANNA
No. I mean, my brother Evan. He’s smarter than you think. His grades were always better than mine. And he graduated top of his class.
KARA
Yeah. At a boys’ school.
ANNA
You really think that makes a difference?
KARA
Don’t you?
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM DIRECTOR’S OFFICE — DAY
JENNY, the quirky, meticulously dressed gray-haired museum director, is seated at her desk leafing through a stack of papers when Anna hesitantly peeks into her office.
ANNA
Jenny? Do you have a minute?
Jenny looks up from the papers and smiles welcomingly at Anna.
JENNY
Of course. Come on in.
Anna inches into the office, looking around. The walls are jam packed with certificates and photographs of historical moments. Bookshelves filled with thick volumes and artifacts line the walls. Every inch of Jenny’s enormous desk is covered with clutter.
ANNA
Oh. Wow.
Noticing Anna’s expression, Jenny looks around the office ruefully.
JENNY
Yeah . . . I might have cleaned up if I’d known you were coming. But probably not.
ANNA
I won’t take much of your time. I’m just here to inquire about the opening on the research team.
Jenny suddenly perks up.
JENNY
I didn’t know you were interested in research. Please. Sit down.
Jenny gestures to the chair in front of her desk that is already partially filled with old newspapers and magazines. Anna hesitates and then moves the stack onto the floor before sitting.
JENNY
Now. What kind of experience do you have in research?
ANNA
Oh, I’m not asking for myself. I’m asking about the job for my twin brother Evan.
JENNY
Evan?
ANNA
You may have seen him around. He’s currently employed with a local office cleaning company.
JENNY
A janitor?
ANNA
Yes. At the moment. But I know he’s more than capable of this position. I took a look at the list of job requirements and—
JENNY
I’m going to stop you right there, Anna. While I appreciate what you are trying to do for your brother, he’s not the right fit for this position.
ANNA
What do you mean? Why not? You haven’t even met him.
JENNY
I don’t need to. Anna, this position is open only to women.
Jenny folds her hands matter-of-factly. Anna stares at Jenny blankly.
ANNA
Only to women? I didn’t see that on the job description.
JENNY
Oh, you won’t. Equal opportunity and all that. But it’s only a matter of time before that gets repealed as well.
ANNA
What—?
JENNY
Anna, look around you. Has it never occurred to you that all of your coworkers are female? Did you think that just happened by accident?
Anna stands.
ANNA
Are you telling me you won’t hire a man?
JENNY
I’m telling you, I don’t have to. There are more than enough qualified women that could take this position.
ANNA
I cannot believe what I’m hearing.
Jenny laughs.
JENNY
You act like we’re the only organization doing it. But I’ve got contacts at the National Gallery, the Smithsonian, Holocaust Memorial who sre all doing the exact same thing. Even the international Spy Museum! Their last male employee just retired on Tuesday.
ANNA
By choice?
Jenny stands with a sigh and crosses to the door.
JENNY
Come on, Anna. Don’t be that way. This isn’t some sort of conspiracy. It’s just the way the world is going. You’re already on board, so don’t rock the boat, okay?
Jenny opens the office door.
JENNY
Thanks for coming.
Shell shocked, Anna leaves the office.
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM HALLWAY — DAY — CONTINUOUS
Displayed on the wall outside the office is a replica of the Declaration of Independence. Anna’s gaze lands directly on the phrase “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”
Anna’s cell phone buzzes in her pocket. She pulls it out and sees a text from Evan: “Any news?”
Anna pockets the cell phone again without responding.
-
Megan’s Act 2 Reaction to TP 1
What I learned doing this assignment is… that the protagonist’s reaction to the Act 1 turning point is the first time they start to feel uncomfortable in their own environment, in their own skin. I feel like I had already started working on this reaction scene previous to this lesson (Anna’s drive to work and coffeeshop scene), so I just completed the missing scenes shortly after the Act 1 turning point.
INT. ANNA’S LIVING ROOM — EVENING
Anna walks in the front door. David is standing over the stove making dinner. Luke sits on the floor in the living room playing with colorful plastic blocks.
David
Hey! You’re home!
ANNA
Hi, honey.
Anna distractedly takes off her coat and hangs it in the hall closet.
DAVID
How was the doctor’s appointment?
Anna is so caught up in her own thoughts that she doesn’t hear him. After a moment, David sets down the serving spoon and tries again.
DAVID
Anna?
ANNA
Hmm?
DAVID
Everything okay?
Anna crosses into the kitchen and gives David a quick peck on the cheek.
ANNA
I’m fine. Everything’s fine.
DAVID
What did the doctor have to say?
ANNA
I’m pregnant.
There is a moment of deafening silence as David stares at Anna in shock. Then a slow smile spreads across David’s face.
DAVID
You’re pregnant? We’re pregnant??
Anna smiles weakly.
ANNA
Yeah. I guess we are.
David wraps his arms around Anna’s waist ecstatically, pulling her in for a bear hug. From the expression on her face, Anna is clearly far away.
DAVID
Did you hear that, Luke? You’re getting a brother or a sister!
After a moment, David notices Anna’s lack of enthusiasm and pulls back.
DAVID
Please tell me I’m not the only one excited about this.
ANNA
Oh, honey, of course I’m excited. I’m just . . . tired. I think I’m going to go lie down if that’s okay.
DAVID
You don’t want any dinner?
ANNA
No. I just . . . I need to lie down.
Anna exits the room, David’s worried eyes following her.
INT. ANNA’S BEDROOM — NIGHT
Anna is lying in bed on her side, facing away from the door when David enters. He crosses to the bed, quickly sheds his clothing, and slides into bed under the blankets behind her, wrapping his arms around her.
DAVID
I got Luke in bed.
Anna doesn’t respond. David tries again, kissing the side of her neck.
DAVID
He missed saying good night to you.
ANNA
I’m sorry, honey. Thanks for taking care of him.
DAVID
Always. I’m more than happy to take care of this next one too.
Anna rolls over to face David.
ANNA
How did I get such great guy?
DAVID
Luck.
Anna smiles weakly. David studies her.
DAVID
Come on. What’s wrong? Really.
Anna rolls away to avoid his searching eyes.
ANNA
Did I tell you I met the Vice President today?
DAVID
You did?
ANNA
She came to the museum.
DAVID
Wow. That’s kind of a big deal. You’re kind of a big deal, aren’t you?
ANNA
Not hardly.
DAVID
Well, better the Vice President than the President.
Anna rolls toward David, mildly intrigued.
ANNA
Why do you say that?
DAVID
To be honest, I’ve never really liked President Harris.
ANNA
Why?
DaVID
I don’t know why. There’s just something about her I don’t trust.
The silence hangs in the air as Anna stares up at the ceiling. David studies her.
DAVID
Sorry if that bothers you. I know she’s kind of like a hero to you.
ANNA
It’s fine. You deserve to have your own opinion. It’s a free country.
Anna rolls over, her back to David.
DAVID
Okay then. Good night?
ANNA
Good night.
-
Megan Finished Act 1
What I learned doing this assignment is… at first, when I saw the assignment was to finish the rest of Act 1, it sounded like a tall order. I had at least four unwritten scenes left in Act 1 and previous to this point, the most I had completed was two scenes in a day. However, I found that writing these connecting scenes did not take nearly as much time as writing the key scenes did. I just stuck to the beat sheet, outlined, and drafted. It’s so simple that I found myself wondering why I’ve rarely used this process in the past to get screenplays completed.
-
Megan’s Turning Point 1 Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is… oops. I wrote my Act 1 Turning Point scene last lesson, thinking it was my inciting incident. So for this lesson, I’m backtracking to what I’ve determined is my real inciting incident earlier in the act.
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE — DAY
Anna sits on a paper-covered medical table, practically naked in a hospital gown and socks.
DOCTOR SLOAN, an attractive, meticulously dressed obstetrician in her early 50s, enters cheerfully.
SLOAN
Good news! The blood test is back. You are, in fact, pregnant!
ANNA
I had a feeling.
SLOAN
But good new, right?
ANNA
Oh, of course! Great news. David and Luke will be thrilled.
SLOAN
I’m going to have you lie back for a quick exam and then we’ll see if we can determine a due date!
Anna lies back on the table. SLOAN begins to palpitate Anna’s breasts and belly.
SLOAN
So this is pregnancy number two for you, right?
ANNA
Yes. My son Luke turned two just a couple months ago.
SLOAN
Then I bet you’re hoping for a little girl this time!
Anna
Honestly, I don’t care as long as it’s healthy. But I bet my husband David would like a girl.
SLOAN
Well, you might be finding out the gender sooner than expected. By the feel of it, you’re well over three months along already.
ANNA
What? Really??
Sloan helps Anna sit up.
SLOAN
Do you remember the first day of your last menstrual cycle?
Anna
This is totally embarrassing, but no. I’ve always been extremely irregular.
SLOAN
Well, then, let’s get you scheduled for an ultrasound sooner rather than later. It will help us get a better idea of a timeline. Let’s have you back here in, let’s say, three weeks?
ANNA
Okay. I can do that.
SLOAN
And in the meantime, congratulations! Think pink!
ANNA
Uh, yeah. Think pink.
Sloan exits the exam room, leaving behind a befuddled Anna.
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE WAITING ROOM— DAY
Anna reenters the office waiting room and stops at the desk to speak to the RECEPTIONIST.
ANNA
Hi. I’m supposed to schedule an ultrasound?
Receptionist
How soon?
ANNA
Three weeks.
RECEPTIONIST
Okay. Let me see what we have. Doctor Sloan, right?
Anna
Yes, please.
While the receptionist searches the computer, Anna suddenly notices a commotion in the waiting room behind her. A YOUNG BOY is pitching a fit as his MOTHER tries to drag him back into the exam rooms. The boy cries, screams, drags his feet.
RECEPTIONIST
Looks like somebody’s not a big fan of the doctor.
ANNA
Is he all right? That just doesn’t seem normal.
RECEPTIONIST
He’ll be fine. Some boys are just more willful than others.
Anna watches as the mother finally maneuvers the young boy back into an exam room. His howls echo down the hall.
ANNA
But why is he so terrified? What are they doing to him?
RECEPTIONIST
Now you know I can’t tell you that. Patient confidentiality.
ANNA
Right. I know. It’s just—
RECEPTIONIST
If I told you, I’d have to kill you.
Anna freezes until the receptionist laughs.
RECEPTIONIST
How about Tuesday the fifth?
ANNA
Tuesday the fifth? For what??
RECEPTIONIST
Your ultrasound?
Anna releases a relieved breath.
ANNA
Oh. Right. That. What time?
Anna and the receptionist finish booking Anna’s appointment. When Anna turns around, she sees a MAN dressed in black and wearing a dark baseball cap sitting in a chair in the corner of the waiting room. He appears to be reading a magazine.
Anna eyes him warily.
ANNA
(to Receptionist)
Thank you.
Anna glances back at the man in the corner. He hasn’t moved. She gets the sudden feeling he’s been watching her.
Suddenly, the mother and young boy reenters the waiting room. The boy has lost all fight. He walks limply, almost zombie-like, beside his mother. They approach the receptionist.
RECEPTIONIST
(to Boy)
See now? It wasn’t all that bad.
Anna meets the mother’s weary eyes. Anna opens her mouth as if about to speak, but then thinks better of it.
Anna gives the mother a forced smile and exits the doctor’s office. A moment later, the man from the corner of the waiting room follows her.
EXT. PARKING LOT — DAY
The sun is setting as Anna walks to her car on the far side of the parking lot. Suddenly, she stops and turns around. No one is behind her.
Anna resumes walking toward her car, more quickly this time. She casts an occasional glance over her shoulder.
Anna clicks the key fob several yards away from her car. The headlights flash as the car unlocks. Anna sighs in relief.
Suddenly, a cloth bag is placed over her head from behind, eliminating her car from view.
-
Megan’s Inciting Incident
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I’m still coming to a stop far too often in my writing. It happens most often when I don’t have specific information, like how to name a Senate bill or the names of drinks on the menu of a coffee shop. I think I need to learn to be okay with leaving placeholder words and just keep writing.
The process of beat sheet to outlining before starting to write does make most of my scene decisions as I’m writing fairly simple, which helps keep my speed up.
INT. FIRST MAN HQ – DAY
The blindfold suddenly comes off. Anna sits in a chair in the middle of a warehouse, blinking in the sudden incandescent light, trying to figure out where she is.
She sees unfamiliar male face after unfamiliar male face until—
ANNA
Dad??
ADAM, Anna’s stern-faced, silver-haired father, steps out of the shadows, lips tight in determination.
Adam
Anna. Welcome.
ANNA
What the hell?!
ADAM
I apologize for the cloak and dagger nonsense but I assure you, it was necessary.
ANNA
You scared me half to death! Untie me!
Adam nods at another MAN, who unties Anna’s wrists. Anna bolts out of the chair, but Adam grabs her by the shoulders.
ADAM
Not so fast. You were brought here for a reason.
ANNA
And you think I care?? You had me kidnapped like some sort of crazy person!
ADAM
Desperate times, Anna. We had to make sure you would come.
ANNA
Who’s “we”?
Evan emerges from the shadows.
EVAN
Hey, there, Anna Banana.
Anna whirls to face him.
ANNA
Evan??
EVAN
Yeah. Sorry. We really didn’t mean to scare you.
ANNA
Scared? Scared?! You about gave me a heart attack!
Anna gives Evan a shove as he tries to come closer to her to console her.
EVAN
Man, I told Eli to cool it with the melodrama.
ADAM
It doesn’t matter. She’s here now.
ANNA
It doesn’t matter?? What are you talking about?! Where’s “here”?
ADAM
Sit down, Anna.
ANNA
No! Not until I get some answers!
ADAM
Then sit down!
Glaring, Anna drops back into the seat. ELI, one of the men, leans over to Evan.
Eli
So I see which twin got all the fire.
Evan shoves Eli playfully.
EVAN
See? Told you she’d be perfect.
ANNA
Perfect? For what?
Adam
Anna, what I’m about to tell you cannot leave this room. Thousands of lives are at stake. Do you understand?
ANNA
No! I don’t understand any of this!
EVAN
You will. Just give him half a minute to get a word in.
Anna glares at Evan.
ANNA
I cannot believe you were in on this.
Adam grabs another chair and places it in front of Anna. He sits.
ADAM
Anna, have you ever heard of an organization called First Man?
Anna cocks her head.
ANNA
No. I don’t think so. What time period?
ADAM
This isn’t a historical question, Anna. I’m talking about now. Current events.
ANNA
Okay. Then, no, I have no idea.
ADAM
Look around.
Anna looks past her father and brother. A dozen men or so hover in the shadows watching. Waiting.
ANNA
What is this? Some sort of fight club?
Evan laughs.
EVAN
If it were, we wouldn’t be talking about it. First rule of fight club—
ANNA
We don’t talk about fight club. Yeah, I know.
ADAM
In a way, through, that’s exactly what we are. Only we’re fighting together, not against each other.
ANNA
Fighting together against what?
ADAM
What do you think? Can you honestly tell me that you, a professional, educated woman have no idea what I’m talking about? Watch the news! Or for that matter, walk out your front door and look around for a change! There’s an entire portion of the population that’s disappearing before our eyes!
ANNA
Disappearing?
ADAM
Men! When is the last time you saw a man in any position of power? A manager, a supervisor, a contractor?
ELI
Hell, even our Chief of Police is a woman!
EVAN
(aside to Anna)
Eli works for the police department.
ANNA
Well, what’s wrong with that? Do you have a problem with women in positions of authority?
ADAM
That’s not the issue here at all. I’ve never had a problem with gender equality or equal opportunity. But we don’t have equal opportunity anymore. Not since Bianca Harris became president.
ANNA
That can’t be true. President Harris has been great for this country! The crime rate has been cut in half. We’ve had no noticeable conflict, foreign or domestic, in decades. And there’s virtually no unemployment!
EVAN
Sure, no unemployment. But no freedom either. We can’t get the jobs we want.
ANNA
What are you talking about? Men still work.
EVAN
Yes. In all the blue collar positions.
ADAM
This isn’t just about employment. Men are being denied the basic rights this country was founded upon: life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
ANNA
Life? Come on, Dad. Don’t you think you’re exaggerating just a little?
Anna gets to her feet. She looks at the door as though considering making a break for it.
EVAN
Dad. You need to tell her.
ANNA
Tell me what?
Adam stares at Anna for a long moment, silently weighing the options.
ADAM
No.
ANNA
Tell me what??
EVAN
Dad! Just tell her already!
Adam stands and moves back toward the shadows.
ADAM
Clearly she is not with us. This was a mistake.
EVAN
No! It’s not a mistake!
Evan suddenly grabs Anna by the shoulders, practically shaking her.
EVAN
Anna! We had a brother. A younger brother. His name was Liam—!
ADAM
I said no!
Adam separates Evan and Anna, dragging Evan away. He barks orders to the other men in the room.
ADAM
Take her home.
EVAN
Anna, you’ve got to listen to me! These are the answers you’ve been looking for!
ANNA
I . . . I haven’t been looking for answers.
ADAM
Which explains why you see nothing.
A pillow cloth is suddenly pulled over Anna’s head. Darkness.
EXT. OUTSIDE ANNA’S HOUSE — THE NEXT MORNING
Anna steps out of her house on the way to work. Blue skies, sunny day. She glances over at her next-doo-neighbor PAMELA, who is also leaving for work. Pamela waves.
PameLa
Hi, Anna!
Anna waves back, a bit distractedly. Pamela slides into the driver’s seat of a red convertible in the driveway. Anna watches as Pamela waves toward the house.
Suddenly, Pamela’s husband MIKE emerges from the house, laden down with backpacks, lunch boxes, and school papers. Four young girls of various ages swirl around him, singing, complaining, arguing with one another.
Mike
Stop it! Stop touching your sister. I don’t care if she started it. We’re going to be late for school!
With difficulty, Mike navigates the chaos into the minivan parked behind the convertible.
PAMELA
(to Mike)
See you later, honey!
Pamela peels out of the driveway without a backward glance. Anna slides into her own car in the driveway and leaves for work.
INT. ANNA’S CAR — MORNING — CONTINUOUS
On her way to work, Anna glances out the window. She sees garbage trucks in action, each manned by a male. She stops for a school bus with its stop sign extended. The bus driver nods at her through the window. Another male.
Anna’s phone buzzes. She glances down to see a text from Kara: Bring coffee?
INT. COFFEE SHOP — MORNING — CONTINUOUS
A bell on the door rings as Anna steps into the coffee shop. The line is fairly short today.
As she waits her turn, Anna scans the workers behind the counter. All male. Most look extremely frazzled, tired, and unhappy.
Anna steps up to the counter when it’s her turn. She glances at the name tag of the boy behind the register: CHRIS.
ANNA
Good morning, Chris.
Chris seems surprised by the interaction and replies unconvincingly.
Chris
Yeah. Hi. Good morning. What can I get you?
ANNA
Two grandes. An iced caffe mocha and a nonfat caramel Frappuccino. Please.
Chris is already walking away to make the drinks before she says please. Anna scans the workers running the drive thru. All male.
Another male worker slides to the register to ring Anna up. His name tag says “GREG.”
Greg
That’ll be $10.42.
Anna swipes her credit card. She glances over at the empty tip jar on the counter.
ANNA
Do you like working here, Greg?
GREG
I’m sorry?
ANNA
Your job. Do you like working here?
Greg shrugs.
GREG
It’s a job.
Chris comes back and puts the two drinks on the counter.
CHRIS
Have a nice day.
Anna picks up the drinks and moves to the door. She glances back at Chris and Greg, already on to the next customer, before leaving.
-
Megan’s Act 1: Opening Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is…wow! This has been so much fun! Fairly quick and easy to following the process of beat sheet, simple outline, and then writing without critique. Extremely happy with the speed I was able to achieve!
INT. Anna’s office at the women’s history museum — Day
ANNA, a 30-something punctilious-looking professional in a pencil skirt, heels, and glasses, sits at her desk, leaning over and breathing frantically into a brown paper bag.
KARA, her coworker, pokes her head in at the office door in concern.
Kara
Anna?
Anna looks up abruptly. She’s been caught. She crumples the paper bag in her hand and hides it under the desk.
Anna
Yes?
KARA
Are you okay?
ANNA
Fine. Just fine.
Kara enters the office, clearly skeptical.
KARA
It’s just a bunch of junior high girls. You don’t need to be nervous.
ANNA
Of course not. I’m not nervous. Just . . . mentally reviewing my notes.
KARA
You were breathing into a paper bag.
ANNA
My stomach is still a little upset. I think the tuna I had for lunch was bad.
EVAN, Anna’s twin brother, pokes his head into the office. He is dressed in coveralls.
EVAN
(to Kara)
Don’t let her fool you. Anna hates public speaking.
(to Anna)
But if you are feeling sick, for God’s sake, don’t do it in here. This carpet’s a bitch to clean.
Anna rolls her eyes and smoothly gets to her feet.
ANNA
Thank you, Evan. I’ll be sure to keep that in mind the next time I have to hurl.
EVAN
Hey, no sense in making my job any harder than it has to be.
Evan points at Anna with a playful smile.
EVAN
Good luck out there today, Anna Banana. Watch out for spit wads.
Evan leaves and Kara watches him go.
KARA
Sometimes it’s so hard to believe you two are related.
ANNA
More than related. We shared the same uterus for nine months. I’m surprised I made it out alive.
KARA
Men.
Kara exits. Once Anna is certain Kara is gone, she opens her desk drawer. A positive pregnancy test is staring back at her. After a moment, she shuts the drawer and strides out of the office.
INT. Senate meeting — Day
VICE PRESIDENT NOVA WALKER is sitting at a table in the front of the room. The Senate is entirely female.
NOVA
Would the committee responsible for Bill S.4138 – Early Mandatory Education Release please rise and report your findings?
COMMITTEE SPOKESWOMAN rises just as the doors to the Senate suddenly swing open. Heads swivel as PRESIDENT BIANCA HARRIS enters with her secretary MAURA. They take a seat obtrusively in the back row.
BIANCA
Apologies for the interruption. Please. Continue.
NOVA’s brows furrow in concern but she nods at the committee spokeswoman to begin.
SPOKESWOMAN
Bill S.4138 – Early Mandatory Education Release has been proposed to allow all males after grade six to opt out of the educational system in favor of pursuing a vocational trade. We believe that allowing such an option will continue to encourage young men toward areas of future employ that are best suited for—
BIANCA stands. She needs no microphone to be heard. Her clear, commanding voice resonates through the room.
BIANCA
Pardon me for interrupting, but am I to understand that this bill is still under discussion and review? How has it not yet been put to a vote?
NOVA
Madame President, your presence and input is always greatly valued at these sessions of the Senate. But as you know, there is a process that these proceedings must follow—
BIANCA
For issues that are much more controversial, I’m sure. But surely not a single woman present here today would be able to voice a serious concern in opposition to an obvious piece of legislation such as this?
NOVA
Madame President, we are talking about rewriting a piece of legislation that has been present in American society since—
SPOKESWOMAN
The Compulsory Attendance Act of 1852, passed by the Massachusetts state legislature.
NOVA
Exactly. Surely it is worth a few months of research and discussion.
BIANCA, eyes locked on Nova, considers the sentiment momentarily. She then rises and makes her way down to the Senate floor. Maura jumps to her feet and is quick to follow her.
BIANCA
1852, did you say? In 1852, women did not have the power to make contracts, to own property, to vote. Her life’s work was simply to bare children and manage her household well. And now, look how far we have come. The first female President and now the first all-female Senate in the history of this country. What a responsibility to uphold! And what has made all this possible, you may ask? How has this good fortune come about? But it is not good fortune at all. It is through a series of carefully crafted decisions made at crucial moments in history that bring us to this time and place today.
Bianca now stands at the podium in the front of the room, all eyes trained on her.
BIANCA
And we have a responsibility to maintain this position, this precarious balancing act. Bill S.4138 will allow young men to find their life’s vocation in a field of service much sooner in life. Resources previously diverted toward male secondary and post-secondary education can be channeled toward our educational centers for women. This is a win-win situation for every woman present, both within and without this room.
NOVA
Madame President, as this bill was introduced at your request, I have no doubt that you have strong opinions about seeing it through. But if we could just continue with our proceedings—
BIANCA
I request that Bill S.4138 — Early Mandatory Education Release be brought to a vote.
NOVA
Bianca! This is completely out of line!
BIANCA
Madame Chair? A roll call vote, if you please.
Nova is still sputtering as Bianca steps back from the microphone and Spokeswoman takes the President’s place. The President makes her way slowly toward the back of the Senate, Maura hurrying to follow.
Names are called one by one, each responds with “yea.” Bianca smiles, slowly, smugly. Her eyes meet Nova’s challengingly before she opens the door and exits. The doors shut with a bang behind her.
-
Megan’s Beat Sheet Draft 2
What I learned doing this assignment is… that while I discovered my theme easily, I’m not quite sure how to weave it into my beats. I found myself spending much more time looking for ways to amp up the antagonist’s game.
Theme: It’s not gender that makes the difference in a good leader; it’s heart.
Antagonist Beats:
President Harris strong arms the Senate.
President learns about First Man. Sends intelligence to hunt them down.
President mentions War on Men to Vice President. Show a difference in opinion between president and vice president.
Add a scene that shows the president choosing her daughters over her husband?
President interviewed by Anna. Hints at rigged elections.
President reveals First Man and Adam to the public at Women’s Day Event as evidence of why the Matriarchy is superior to former governments.
President is shot and wounded by Evan; Adam escapes; president is taken to the hospital.
Anna and President’s showdown in Ward 71. The President has an allergic reaction to flowers delivered to her from the first man, her husband. Anna keeps her promises without being a murderer.
-
Megan’s High Speed Beat Sheet
What I learned doing this assignment is… that high speed writing offers the freedom of no judgment. It does not require that I have all the answers. It allows me to simply create with the ideas I have and rest assured that the holes will fill themselves in eventually.
EXT. PLACEHOLDER LOCATION — DAY
A scene of sunshine, peace, playfulness: laughing kids running through a park?
INT. ANNA’S OFFICE AT THE WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM OFFICE — DAY
Anna breathing into a paper bag panicking before having to speak to a group of junior high students on a field trip. Kind coworkers reassure her. Evan stops by to wish her luck and warns her not to throw up because he doesn’t want to clean up the mess.
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM — DAY
Anna speaks to the group of female students on a field trip about the aftereffects of WW3 and the political shift into a matriarchy. Afterwards, Anna reacts in awe when introduced to Vice President Nova Walker, who arrives to check on preparations for the upcoming Women’s Day Event. Anna finds out the President is severely allergic to flowers.
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM WOMEN’S RESTROOM – DAY
Anna dumping water from flowers. Runs into Evan, who has just finished cleaning the bathroom. Asks about job opening in research; Anna promises to put a good word in if she gets a chance
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE — DAY
A blood test confirms Anna is pregnant. They identify a due date and the doctor tells Anna to schedule an ultrasound. Doctor asks Anna about previous pregnancy: her now 2-year-old son Luke.
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE WAITING ROOM— DAY
Anna notices boy with mom fighting against being taken back for a vaccination. Complete 180 from usual utopia; Anna asks nurse about it but is too afraid of rocking the boat to speak to the child’s mother. A man in the waiting room seems to be watching her.
EXT. PARKING LOT — DAY
On her way to her car, Anna is kidnapped and blindfolded.
INT. FIRST MAN HQ — DAY
When the blindfold comes off, Anna is introduced to First Man; her brother and father are part of it. They try to convince her to join them by pointing out all the injustices around her that she’s been unwilling to see.
Anna’s father Adam reveals that Anna had a second younger brother. Anna’s mistrust of her father and support of the Matriarchy make her unwilling to join them. Evan wonders if they’ve made a mistake in choosing her.
INT. ANNA’S LIVING ROOM — EVENING
David is making dinner when Anna gets home. Luke is playing with toys. David asks how the doctor’s appointment went. Anna does not share kidnapping.
INT. ANNA’S BEDROOM — NIGHT
Add scene? David notices something is off? Anna distracts him by talking about meeting the vice president. Better than the President. David reveals his dislike of President Harris, which comes as a surprise to Anna?
INT. SENATE MEETING — DAY
Vice President is running an all-female Senate meeting when President Harris enters, ostensibly to watch. She eventually speaks up and strong arms the Senate into [something].
EXT. OUTSIDE ANNA’S HOUSE — THE NEXT MORNING
Anna waves to a female neighbor, also heading to work, while her husband hustles four screaming girls into a car for school. Male school bus driver, male trash collector.
EXT. DRIVE TO WORK — MORNING
Anna notices male road workers with a female supervisor. Male truck drivers. Men operating a car wash. Nicer cars driven by women.
INT. OVAL OFFICE — DAY
The President receives intel about the existence of First Man. Demands more information. Puts intelligence on it.
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM BOSS OFFICE — DAY
Anna meets with her boss Jenny about the open position; tries to put in a good word for Evan. Told point blank that the position is only open to women. Anna asks about being an Equal Opportunity Employer. Her boss tells her things are different under the Matriarchy. Just don’t rock the boat, okay?
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM HALLWAY — DAY
Anna checks her cell; sees a hopeful text from Evan. She does not respond.
INT. ULTRASOUND — DAY
At her ultrasound, Anna finds out she is having a boy. Fights off the ultrasound tech who attempts to grab her.
EXT. HOSPITAL — DAY
Sees [something] that reminds her of First Man. Texts Evan. He says he’s on his way.
INT. FIRST MAN HQ — DAY
Anna walks in. All the other men except Adam walk out? Evan gives Anna an encouraging smile and shuts the door. Adam gives Anna a hug, asks if she’s okay, tells her to sit down. Tells Anna how First Man started: Finally reveals that Anna’s mother died protecting her own unborn second son. Anna agrees to help First Man depose the President but insists they must first try to do so peaceably. Adam is skeptical but agrees to let her try.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL GYMNASIUM — NIGHT
At the President’s daughter’s basketball game, Anna pretends to need info for Women’s Day event. Secretary tries to brush her off but President agrees to a short interview during halftime. President reveals no intention of stepping down at the next election. Reveals: elections have been rigged for years and no love lost between president and her husband.
EXT. HIGH SCHOOL — NIGHT
Anna believes she is being followed?.
INT. OVAL OFFICE? — DAY
The president fills in the vice president on First Man, and the two discuss running for reelection.
INT. ANNA’S LIVING ROOM — DAY
While on the phone with Adam, sees a political ad on TV promoting the President’s reelection. Anna somewhat unwillingly agrees to help First Man with their assassination, so long as she’s not the one pulling the trigger.
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM — DAY
Televised Women’s Day assembly at the museum with a guest appearance by the President
EXT. ALLEY BEHIND WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM — DAY
Anna sneaks Evan in through an unguarded emergency exit.
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM — DAY
During the event. President Harris reveals the existence of First Man and brings in a handcuffed Adam the ringleader as an example why the Matriarchy has been so much more successful than the democracy before it. Evan shoots and wounds the president but doesn’t kill her, Adam escapes, and Evan is shot and killed himself; Anna rushes to her brother and is arrested for conspiracy.
INT. JAIL HOLDING CELL — DAY
David visits her in jail? begs her not to cause any more disruptions? Anna tells him they’re having a boy. Officer arrives to escort Anna to the hospital.
INT. POLICE CAR — DAY
Placeholder scene?
INT. WALTER REED HOSPITAL LOBBY — DAY
As he’s escorting her into Walter Reed hospital, he suddenly pulls her into a stairwell;
INT. WALTER REED HOSPITAL STAIRWELL — DAY
Anna meets the President’s husband. Reveal: her father is not the actual leader of First Man, only the front man; First Man was begun by the president’s husband. Anna is not here for an abortion; she’s here to finish what Evan started; the president is receiving treatment in Ward 71; Anna insists she can’t do it; she can’t kill the president. The President’s husband tells her she won’t have to.
INT. WARD 71 PRESIDENTIAL SUITE — DAY
Anna’s face off with President; she gets the president to admit aloud the oppressive laws she’s enacted to keep women in power; records the entire thing? When the president realizes, she threatens Anna’s husband, father, and finally her son by name. Anna disconnects the monitors. She wishes the president a speedy recovery and leaves her with a bouquet of flowers from her husband, the First Man. President begins struggling to breathe as Anna leaves.
EXT. LOCATION — DAY
Months later, press junket where Vice President Nova Walker announces her intention to run for the presidency. She brings in Anna as her running mate. David, Luke, and Anna‘s newborn son watch from the front row. Narration mentions Adam is still on the run? But Anna will continue fighting to help make a world where both genders are treated as equals:
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Megan’s Transformational Events
What I learned doing this assignment is…that planning for a fulfilling transformational arc requires knowing the end at the beginning. While it makes sense, I did struggle trying to find additional ideas that aren’t already a part of my 4-Act Structure.
Character Arc Start: A docile rule-follower, a mere recounter of history (historian)
Character Arc Finish: Brave protector of the weak and mistreated, someone who makes history (running for Vice President under the slogan of “True Equality for All”)
Old Ways: rule follower, listener rather than public speaker, bookish homebody; hates to rock the boat; firm supporter of the Matriarchy because she only saw the good it had achieved; often overlooked, unadventurous; unaware she had a younger brother who was forcibly aborted; unaware her mother gave her life to protect her unborn son
New Ways: rule breaker for public good, a Mama Bear, willing to fight for those she cares about (twin brother, father, sons both born and unborn), running as the Vice President’s running mate; everyone knows her name and face; lives with death threats; eyes open to truth, even when it isn’t pretty.
6-8 Changes from Old to New:
Notice questionable or unfair rules in regards to men
Learn about First Man and that her father and brother are a part of it
Confront her father about the reason her mother died
Find out that only one male is permitted per family just as she discovers she’s pregnant with her second son
Agree to become a part of First Man
See for herself the cruel streak in the President
Play a role in exposing the President’s corruption
Become running mate to the vice president
Events or Tests:
Boy’s extreme reaction to vaccinations
Going to bat for her brother Evan for an open position at work
Being blindfolded and kidnapped and taken to First Man’s underground HQ
Meeting the president and vice president
Escape from doctors trying to force an abortion
Sneaking Evan into the Women’s Day event
Dilemma: allow Evan to die or reveal her role in the assassination attempt
Dilemma: escape with her (and her unborn child’s) life or finish what Evan started
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Megan’s 4 Act Transformational Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is… that tentatively outlining ensures intriguing turning points, and avoids an Act 2 slump. I also see the value in two passes, because even after this first pass, I realized there is not enough of my antagonist yet in my outline. Hoping to add more of her as well as fill in a few more holes on this next pass.
Concept: Anna enjoys her uncomplicated, comfortable life in a matriarchal society until the unknown rules that keep women in power threaten the life of her unborn son.
Main Conflict: First Man, an underground organization led by Anna’s father Adam, wants to depose the exceptionally popular president who has been oppressing men for the last 20 years, but they need a woman on the inside to make it happen.
Old Ways: rule follower, listener rather than public speaker, bookish homebody; hates to rock the boat; firm supporter of the Matriarchy because she only saw the good it had achieved; often overlooked, unadventurous; unaware she had a younger brother who was forcibly aborted; unaware her mother gave her life to protect her unborn son
New Ways: rule breaker for public good, a Mama Bear, willing to fight for those she cares about (twin brother, father, sons both born and unborn), running for President; everyone knows her name and face; lives with death threats; eyes open to truth, even when it isn’t pretty.
Act 1:
Opening: Utopian matriarchal society: Anna’s dream job as a historian with an amazing team of women; speaking to a group of female students on a field trip about the aftereffects of WW3 and the political shift into a matriarchy; setting up for upcoming Women’s Day event; Anna meets the vice President when she arrives to check on preparations; find out president is severely allergic to flowers? her twin brother Evan, who is smarter, works as a janitor; Anna at the doctor where a blood test confirms she’s pregnant
Inciting Incident: Notices boy with mom at doctor’s office fighting against vaccination. Complete 180 from usual utopia; Anna asks nurse about it but is too afraid of rocking the boat to speak to the child’s mother. A man in the waiting room seems to be watching her.
Turning Point: Kidnapped on way home, blindfolded. When the blindfold comes off, she’s at First Man underground; first reveal: her brother and father are part of First Man. They try to convince her to join them by pointing out all the injustices around her that she’s been unwilling to see. Second reveal: Anna had a second younger brother. Anna’s mistrust of her father and support of the Matriarchy make her unwilling to join them. Evan wonders if they’ve made a mistake in choosing her.
Act 2:
New plan: Anna goes through her normal routine but with eyes open. She now sees inequities she never noticed before. Anna promises to put in a good word at work to get Evan a job at the museum. The President receives intel about the existence of First Man. Demands more information. Puts intelligence on it.
Plan in action: Anna meets with her boss about the open position; tries to put in a good word for Evan. Told point blank that the position is only open to women. Anna asks about being an Equal Opportunity Employer. Her boss tells her things are different under the Matriarchy. Just don’t rock the boat, okay?
Midpoint Turning Point: At her ultrasound, Anna finds out she is having a boy. Fights off the ultrasound tech who attempts to grab her. Runs to First Man for answers. Third reveal: Anna’s mother died protecting her own unborn second son.
Act 3:
Rethink everything: Anna agrees to help First Man depose the President but insists they must first try to do so peaceably. Interviews the President at her daughter’s basketball game. President reveals no intention of stepping down at the next election. Reveal: elections have been rigged for years. No love lost between president and her husband. Anna believes she is being followed.
New plan: the president fills in the vice president on First Man, and the two discuss running for reelection. Anna reports back to First Man; has no other choice but to consider an assassination attempt.
Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift: Televised Women’s Day assembly at the museum with a guest appearance by the President; Anna gets Evan into position; he wounds the president but doesn’t kill her and is shot and killed himself; Anna rushes to her brother and is arrested for conspiracy.
Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: David visits her in jail? begs her not to cause any more disruptions? Anna tells him they’re having a boy.
Police escorts Anna en route to the hospital for a forced abortion. As he’s escorting her into Walter Reed hospital, he suddenly pulls her into a stairwell; she meets the President’s husband. Reveal: her father is not the actual leader of First Man, only the front man; First Man was begun by the president’s husband. Anna is not here for an abortion; she’s here to finish what Evan started; the president is receiving treatment in Ward 71; Anna insists she can’t do it; she can’t kill the president. The President’s husband tells her she won’t have to.
How does Anna get into the room? Distraction from the president’s husband? Anna’s face off with President; she gets the president to admit aloud the oppressive laws she’s enacted to keep women in power; records the entire thing? When the president realizes, she threatens Anna’s husband, father, and finally her son by name. Anna disconnects the monitors. She wishes the president a speedy recovery and leaves her with a bouquet of flowers from her husband, the First Man. President begins struggling to breathe as Anna leaves.
Resolution: Months later, press junket where Vice President Nova Walker announces her intention to run for the presidency. She brings in Anna as her running mate. David, Luke, and Anna‘s newborn son watch from the front row.
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Hello! Megan Schemenauer from South Bend, IN. I’ve written 4 screenplays so far, 1 pilot, and over a dozen published plays. Looking forward to learning how to write even more quickly!
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Megan’s Character Interviews
What I learned doing this assignment is…that while I have never done a character interview exercise like this one before, I found it interesting. Unlike answering questions about my characters from my own perspective, actually interviewing the characters forces me to become both the protagonist and the antagonist and answer as they would. While I got a few more details about the characters that I didn’t already know—Anna loves her coworkers and actually voted for the President, President’s daughters’ names and current approval rating, the reason the President would feel especially embittered toward Anna, and the President’s true feelings about her husband—what I found even more insightful was the way in which they answered. I discovered my protagonist is much more confused, timid, and reluctant to join First Man than I realized while my antagonist speaks with a confidence bordering on arrogance. It wasn’t what they said so much as how they said it that really caught my attention. Love how this activity brought them even more to life!
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Megan’s Character Profile Part 2
What I learned doing this assignment is…that it’s okay not to have all the answers right away. Details at this point are fluid and can be changed. But I’m definitely getting a better picture of my two main characters.
Role in the story: Anna Fitzgerald; protagonist; make-no-waves historian
Age range and Description: late 20s/early 30s; a fit, career- and family-focused individual who enjoys her uncomplicated life
Internal Journey: from a docile rule-follower to brave protector of the weak and mistreated
External Journey: from a mere recounter of history (historian) to someone who makes history (running for President under the slogan of “True Equality for All”)
Motivation: to save her second unborn son, to see her father Adam and twin brother Evan treated fairly
Wound: resentment toward her father for never explaining why her mother died
Mission/Agenda: Assassinating President Harris since she will never voluntarily step down (in her 5th term); keep her unborn second son from harm
Secret: First she must hide the fact that she is pregnant with her second son; then she has to hide the fact she’s working with First Man to take down the President
What makes them special? Her knowledge of history, and her understanding that history repeats itself; she will not make the same mistakes.
What draws us to this character? A woman in a position of power in her world but she remains humble and doesn’t abuse it
Traits: fiercely loyal, truth seeker, compassionate, full of self-doubt
Subtext: hides her connection to First Man and the fact that her second unborn child is male; changes the topic or plays up her pregnancy
Flaw: indecision
Values: family and equality
Irony: Anna lives a comfortable, uncomplicated life in a female-dominant society, but she is willing to complicate her own life if it means greater equality for everyone. As a historian, she is supposed to recount history; now she is making it. Hates public speaking but by the end is running for president.
What makes this the right character for this role? Having come from a family of men, and only having men in her household, she knows from experience how to think like a man while maintaining the heart of a woman, making her the ideal candidate to bridge the gap between genders.
Role in the story: President Bianca Harris; antagonist; a Change Agent: fifth term president not above breaking the rules to maintain her power
Age range and Description: late 50s/early 60s; a large, formidable woman with an iron will, a do-anything-necessary mentality; has two daughters; truly believe the decisions she makes are looking out for their best interests
Internal Journey: from a benevolent but shrewd leader to a heartless dictator, hell-bent on maintaining her control
External Journey: from an unchallenged, fifth term president to an assassination victim
Motivation: to create a world for her two daughters, where women have the rights they deserve
Wound: raped in college, but unable to prove and prosecute her rapist; she gave up that baby (abortion? adoption?)
Mission/Agenda: to maintain her presidency and the laws created to protect women; to eradicate the underground organization known as First Man
Secret: some of the programs she has enacted are not just focused on elevating women’s equality: they actively oppress men (estrogen vaccinations, one male child policy)
What makes them special? Extremely charismatic; her father was president before her
What draws us to this character? A woman who has achieved the perfect balance in life: a wonderful, loving mother and successful President of the United States. Able to make ice cold decisions for the country’s greater (female) good but still makes time to attend her daughters’ athletic events.
Traits: charismatic, observant, shrewd, calculating
Subtext: uses practicality and the claim of equality to cover up an ends-justifies-the-means mentality
Flaw: oversecurity in her position; the belief that because she takes care of women, that they will take care of her
Values: power, maintaining appearances, her daughters, revenge?
Irony: a loving mother who is also a cunning political leader; can be a woman’s best friend, but if they cross her, their worst enemy
What makes this the right character for this role? Because her father was president before her, she knows how to play the political game. Growing up as part of the first family taught her charisma. Her resentment against men due to her wound makes her a dangerous male enemy in the White House. Her incredible love for her daughters drives her to make decisions that will create a better future for them— fair or not.
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Megan’s Character Profiles – Part 1
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I enjoy the brainstorming part of this process: asking questions, filling in holes, discovering things I hadn’t realized yet about my characters. I find myself already thinking through the storyline, and we’re not even to the beat sheet yet. (maybe this is what they mean by “character is story”?)
My protagonist Anna Fitzgerald is both a Victim and a Dreamer. She is a victim because it is her second unborn son at stake. She is a dreamer because she wants to bring about a world where true equality is possible.
My antagonist president Bianca Harris is a Change Agent, the current president of the Matriarchy, who brings about the laws to keep women in power, even if some of those laws are not equitable.
Supporting characters:
Vice President Nova Walker
Speaker of the House Lynette Peterson
Anna’s husband David
Anna’s son Luke
Anna’s twin brother Evan
Anna‘s father, Adam, leader of the underground First Man
Minor roles:
Anna’s dead mother
Anna’s obstetrician
Ultrasound technician
Anna’s boss at the museum
Anna’s coworkers at the museum
Background characters: field trip students and teachers, museum workers, White House staffers, members of First Man, reporters, news anchors
Genre: Drama
Role in the story: Anna Fitzgerald; protagonist; make-no-waves historian
Age range and Description: late 20s/early 30s; a fit, career- and family-focused individual who enjoys her uncomplicated life
Internal Journey: from a docile rule-follower to brave protector of the weak and mistreated
External Journey: from a mere recounter of history (historian) to someone who makes history (running for President under the slogan of “True Equality for All”)
Motivation: to save her second unborn son, to see her father Adam and twin brother Evan treated fairly
Wound: resentment toward her father for never explaining why her mother died
Mission/Agenda: Assassinating President Harris since she will never voluntarily step down (in her 5th term); keep her unborn second son from harm
Secret: First she must hide the fact that she is pregnant with her second son; then she has to hide the fact she’s working with First Man to take down the President
What makes them special? Her knowledge of history, and her understanding that history repeats itself; she will not make the same mistakes. Having come from a family of men, and only having men in her household, she knows from experience how to think like a man while maintaining the heart of a woman, making her the ideal candidate to bridge the gap between genders.
Role in the story: President Bianca Harris; antagonist; a Change Agent: fifth term president not above breaking the rules to maintain her power
Age range and Description: late 50s/early 60s; a large, formidable woman with an iron will, a do-anything-necessary mentality; has two daughters; truly believe the decisions she makes are looking out for their best interests
Internal Journey: from a benevolent but shrewd leader to a heartless dictator, hell-bent on maintaining her control
External Journey: from an unchallenged, fifth term president to an assassination victim
Motivation: to create a world for her two daughters, where women have the rights they deserve
Wound: raped in college, but unable to prove and prosecute her rapist; she gave up that baby (abortion? adoption?)
Mission/Agenda: to maintain her presidency and the laws created to protect women; to eradicate the underground organization known as First Man
Secret: some of the programs she has enacted are not just focused on elevating women’s equality: they actively oppress men (estrogen vaccinations, one male child policy)
What makes them special? Extremely charismatic; her father was president before her
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Megan’s Transformational Journey
What I learned doing this assignment is… that by answering some of these basic questions about the transformational journey, I can start to see certain actions and scenes that will need to take place. I also feel like I’m getting better acquainted with my main character.
Hero: Anna Fitzpatrick
Internal Journey: from a docile rule-follower to brave protector of the weak and mistreated
External Journey: from a mere recounter of history (historian) to someone who makes history (running for President under the slogan of “True Equality for All”)
Old Ways: rule follower, listener rather than public speaker, bookish homebody; hates to rock the boat; firm supporter of the Matriarchy because she only saw the good it had achieved; often overlooked, unadventurous; unaware she had a younger brother who was forcibly aborted; unaware her mother gave her life to protect her unborn son
New Ways: rule breaker for public good, a Mama Bear, willing to fight for those she cares about (twin brother, father, sons both born and unborn), running for President; everyone knows her name and face; lives with death threats; eyes open to truth, even when it isn’t pretty
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1. Megan Schemenauer
2. I agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
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Megan’s Outline With Intrigue
What I learned doing this assignment is… just when you think you’ve considered every possible angle of your outline, there’s another opportunity for further improvement.
I was tempted to skip this lesson due to being so far behind. While I don’t have the time to reconsider the intrigue in each scene as much as I would like, I’m at least going to fill in the blanks for this assignment.
This outlining process was lengthy but incredibly valuable.
TEASER
INT. ELEGANT LA RESTAURANT — NIGHT: Secret Identity
Dressed as a waitress, Alexis fills the crystal water glasses of the Hollywood executives she has been assigned to bust. One of the men hits on Alexis, grabbing her ass. After obtaining the information she seeks, she slams the man against the table and cuffs him. The restaurant manager rushes out and fires her as she walks by and quits. She pauses on her way out of the restaurant to check her appearance in a mirror.
Open Loop: What does Alexis do for a living?
Mystery: Why is she allowed to get away with this behavior?
Empathy/Distress: Alexis is sexually harassed.
Payoff: Alexis gets revenge for the ass grab.
Irony: A beautiful waitress who is also dangerously capable of defending herself
Setup: Alexis as an undercover agent
INT. LEXIE’S BEDROOM — DAY: Imminent Threat
Lexie’s face is now the one staring in a mirror. She nervously scrutinizes her appearance as Alexis’s VO about the importance of trust begins. It is the first day of high school. She combs through her closet, trying on and discarding outfit after outfit until most of her closet is on the floor. She finally settles on a dress. She adds a necklace but the chain breaks. Is it a sign of what’s to come?
Open Loop: Is Lexie connected to Alexis?
Mystery: What kind of first day will Lexie have?
Empathy/Distress: Lexie is nervous; her necklace breaks.
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup: Lexie’s nervous excitement about starting high school; the broken necklace as a sign of what’s to come
ACT 1
EXT. OUTSIDE LEXIE’S HOUSE — DAY: Wound
Lexie excitedly joins her childhood best friend Betsy and Betsy‘s younger brother Marcus, who are waiting at the corner for the bus. Betsy bluntly criticizes Lexie‘s outfit, and Lexie’s spirits bottom out. In Lexie‘s mental replay, Betsy slaps Lexie across the face. Lexie boards the bus behind them, deflated.
Open Loop: Will Lexie and Betsy’s friendship survive high school?
Mystery: How did two complete opposites become friends?
Empathy/Distress: Lexie’s friend is tactless.
Payoff: what other people will think of Lexie‘s outfit
Irony: Betsy is Lexie‘s best friend but she’s her harshest critic.
Setup: tension between Lexie and Betsy
INT. SCHOOL BUS — DAY: Mystery
The bus driver greets the trio as they board the bus. he asks their names but misunderstands Lexie‘s. Before she can correct him, he tells her to take a seat. Lexie stumbles down the aisle and nearly wipes out. She slinks to a seat in the back. Betsy tells her she should learn to stand up for herself.
Open Loop: Will Lexie ever learn to speak up for herself?
Mystery: Why is it so difficult for Lexie to speak up?
Empathy/Distress: No one seems to listen to Lexie.
Payoff:
Irony: Rather than helping Lexie, Betsy lectures her.
Setup: Lexie needs to learn to speak up for herself.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL HALLWAY — DAY: Wound
Lexie tentatively enters the high school hallway as a bell rings. A group of three mean girls see her and begin to point and snicker at her outfit. Lexie rushes past the mean girls, head down and humiliated.
Open Loop: How will Lexie fit in with kids in high school?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: students are laughing at the outfit Lexie spent so long picking out.
Payoff: Betsy was right about Lexie‘s outfit.
Irony:
Setup: Lexie doesn’t fit in.
EXT. HIGH SCHOOL FIELD — DAY: Mystery
Playing goalie for a field hockey game during PE class, Lexie nervously hops from foot to foot in the goal. A huge girl approaches and takes an aggressive shot on goal. Lexie ducks to avoid getting beaned in the face. The PE teacher runs out onto the field, blowing his whistle and waving his arms at Lexie in frustration. Lexie cringes.
Open Loop: Is there anything Lexie is good at?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Lexie is humiliated during PE.
Payoff:
Irony: A gym teacher should encourage his students, not embarrass them.
Setup: Lexie needs to become more athletic.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL SPEECH CLASSROOM — DAY: Wound
The speech teacher calls Lexie to the front of the room. She approaches the podium fearfully. After an awkward silence, a few stuttered attempts to speak, and snickers from the other students, a red-faced Lexie runs out of the classroom as the flabbergasted teacher watches.
Open Loop: Will Lexie survive high school classes?
Mystery: Why is it so difficult for Lexie to speak out?
Empathy/Distress: Lexie stutters when she tries public speaking and runs out humiliated.
Payoff:
Irony: it’s speech class but Lexie can’t utter a single word.
Setup: Lexie needs to become better at communicating.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA FOOD LINE — DAY: Mystery
The cafeteria lady asked Lexie if she wants green beans. Lexie says no. The lunch lady ladles green beans onto her tray anyway. In Lexie’s mental relay, The cafeteria lady is a wart-covered ogre and the ladle is twice as large. The green beans inundate her mystery meat and mashed potatoes. Lexie slowly walks away from the line with the unwanted green beans.
Open Loop: Will Lexie ever learn to speak up for herself?
Mystery: Why is it so difficult for Lexie to speak up?
Empathy/Distress: No one listens to what Lexie wants.
Payoff:
Irony: The cafeteria lady is offering Lexie a healthy food but in an emotionally unhealthy way.
Setup: Lexie needs to learn to speak up for what she wants.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA — DAY: Wound
Lexie reenters the noisy, overcrowded cafeteria alone. She sees only one open seat. Just as she is about to take it, a mean kid slides in and steals it. Lexie looks around awkwardly for a minute. Then she sets her tray down and leaves the cafeteria without eating.
Open Loop: How is Lexie going to survive high school? Will she ever eat lunch?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: people are mean to Lexie and she feels alone.
Payoff:
Irony: The cafeteria is a place of social interaction but it’s the place Lexie feels most shut out.
Setup: Since the cafeteria is overcrowded, Lexie has to find somewhere else to eat lunch.
INT. LEXIE’S DINING ROOM — EVENING: Wound
At the dinner table with her family that night, Lexie listens to her older sister Lily brags to their mother about the scholarship opportunities she’s receiving. Dylan, with several empty beer bottles in front of him, jovially engages Lexie‘s younger brother Scott in a conversation about football practice. Lexie looks back-and-forth between the two conversations and then excuses herself from the dinner table. No one notices.
Open Loop: How will Lexie handle being ignored by her own family?
Mystery: Why don’t Lexie‘s parents pay as much attention to her as they do her siblings?
Empathy/Distress: Lexie’s parents seem more interested in her siblings than they do in her.
Payoff:
Irony: Even at home, a place everyone should belong, Lexie doesn’t.
Setup: Lexie‘s detachment from her family as an adult (Alexis)
INT. LEXIE’S BEDROOM — EVENING: Secret
Back in her bedroom, Lexie shuts the door and looks around at her bare walls. She looks down at her blank cell phone. After a moment’s contemplation, she pulls an overnight bag out of her closet, tosses it on the bed, sits down at her computer, and searches for bus times.
Open Loop: Will Lexie run away from home?
Mystery: Has she run away before?
Empathy/Distress: Lexie feels so unnoticed she’s willing to cut ties with everyone and run away.
Payoff: Lexie’s reaction to being unnoticed
Irony: If she runs away, she’ll really have no one.
Setup:
ACT 2
INT. HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA — DAY: Mystery
Betsy enters the crowded cafeteria the next day, tray in hand. She looks around for Lexie. No sign of her. Betsy walks out.
Open Loop:
Mystery: Where is Lexie? Did she actually run away?
Empathy/Distress:
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup: Though she may be blunt, Betsy does look out for and care about Lexie.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL LIBRARY — DAY: Hidden Layer / Conspiracy
Lexie is sitting on the floor in the stacks reading a novel and eating a PBJ. A voice accuses Lexie of stealing her seat. Lexie jumps up and apologizes profusely but Cerise tells her she is just playing. Cerise introduces herself to Lexie. The two chat for a minute before Betsy arrives with her cafeteria tray.
Betsy behaves coldly toward this newcomer who appears to be winning over her longtime best friend. After Cerise leaves, Lexie admits to Betsy that she’s been thinking about running away from home. Betsy convinces her she just needs to find something of her own to make her special and offers to help her find it.
Open Loop: Will Betsy be able to help Lexie find something to make Lexie feel special?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Empathy for both Lexie and Cerise, who are clearly outsiders
Payoff: Finding out where Lexie hides during lunch
Irony:
Setup: blossoming friendship for Lexie and Cerise; tension between Betsy and Cerise as a result of competition for Lexie‘s friendship
MONTAGE
INT. HIGH SCHOOL SCIENCE LAB — DAY: Hidden Layer
In biology, Lexie and Betsy work side-by-side at a lab station. Betsy accidentally sets the sleeve of her lab coat on fire with a Bunsen burner. Tony, a cute boy, smiles at Lexie and in her embarrassment, she accidentally spills a tray of owl pellets on his head.
Open Loop: What will Lexie be good at?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: The girls embarrass themselves.
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup: Lexie notices Tony, who will end up becoming her boyfriend.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL GYMNASIUM — DAY: Mystery
At cheerleading tryouts, Lexie stands in the middle of the gymnasium, hands on hips, facing a trio of board cheerleaders. While attempting a cartwheel, she lands on her head, and the rude cheerleaders begin to laugh at her. Betsy storms over to them and screams at them until they stalk away, glaring back at Betsy.
Open Loop: What will Lexie be good at?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Mean girls make fun of Lexie.
Payoff:
Irony: Cheerleaders are supposed to build people up; these cheerleaders tear Lexie down.
Setup: future feud between Betsy and the cheerleaders
INT. HIGH SCHOOL LIBRARY — DAY: Mystery
Lexie and Betsy sit in a circle with other students, books in hand. Lexie is listening raptly to another student speak, but Betsy, with her head resting on her fist, falls asleep. Her head slips off her fist and she jolts awake.
Open Loop: What will Lexie be good at?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Lexie is interested in things Betsy is not.
Payoff:
Irony: The one thing Lexie likes, Betsy is bored to sleep by.
Setup:
INT. HIGH SCHOOL AUDITORIUM STAGE — DAY: Mystery
Betsy steps onto center stage for the fall musical auditions. She belts out an awful, off pitch number. When it’s Lexie‘s turn, she freezes at center stage like a deer in headlights and then runs away in terror, only to fall off the stage.
Open Loop: What will Lexie be good at?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: again, both girls embarrass themselves.
Payoff:
Irony: In running off stage, Lexi makes an even bigger spectacle of herself.
Setup:
MONTAGE ENDS
INT. HIGH SCHOOL CLASSROOM — DAY: Wound
Lexie is still icing her elbow and kids in the classroom are still taunting her when her English teacher gives the class an assignment: to write an email to their future selves. Lexie turns to Betsy with optimistic hopes about her own future, but Betsy tactlessly shoots down those hopes in traditional Betsy fashion.
Open Loop: Will things ever get better for Lexie?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Kids in class are still making fun of Lexie; even her best friend doesn’t think she will amount to much in the future
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup: The reason Lexie writes an email to her future self
INT. LEXIE’S DINING ROOM — EVENING: Wound
Lexie is once again sitting at the dinner table with her family, but this time the atmosphere is completely different. Dylan, now sober and irritable, shuts down every topic his family raises. Lily mentions winning a position in student government; Dylan rages against the corruption in the US government. Scott mentions that the football team voted on the design for new warm-ups; Dylan rages about the corrupt voting system in America. Lexie tries to tell her parents about her day but her mother shuts her down for fear of further riling up her father. Lexie once again excuses herself from the table early.
Open Loop: What will it take for Lexie‘s parents to pay attention to her?
Mystery: What causes Dylan’s extreme mood shifts? Why does he drink so much?
Empathy/Distress: Lexie doesn’t have a chance to share anything about her life with her family.
Payoff:
Irony: This family dinner is anything but family-focused.
Setup: Dylan’s alcoholism
(What’s going on? Dad ran out of alcohol and Mom won’t let him go to the bar until after dinner.)
INT. LEXIE’S BEDROOM — EVENING: Hidden Agenda
Lexie sits down at her desk. She opens her laptop and fires off her email to her future self. After a momentary pause, she clicks send and goes to bed.
Open Loop: What will happen with Lexie‘s email to her future self?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Since there is no one else in Lexie‘s life, she reaches out to someone who is make-believe.
Payoff:
Irony: Since Lexie can’t talk to someone, she talks to “no one.”
Setup: creates the opportunity for Lexie to connect to Alexis
INT. LEXIE’S BEDROOM — THE NEXT MORNING: Mystery
Lexie wakes up and notices her open laptop. She sees an email in her inbox. It seems to be a response from her future self. In disbelief, Lexie sends a response to the email and receives an almost instantaneous reply. Lexie about falls out of her chair. Just then, Lily yells up that it’s time to go to school. Lexie emails and asks if she can switch to messaging her future self. When the reply is yes, Lexie grabs her backpack and cell phone and leaves for school.
Open Loop: Is the email from Alexis, Lexie’s future self, real?
Mystery: Is Lexie going to keep emailing a stranger? Is it safe?
Empathy/Distress: fear that Lexie is being duped
Payoff:
Irony: The “make-believe” person is the one person who answers her; just when Lexie stops looking for something to make her special, something special finds her.
Setup: The beginning of Lexie‘s friendship with Alexis
ACT 3
EXT. OUTSIDE LEXIE’S HOUSE — DAY: Deception
Lexie is messaging as she walks out of her house. She is in shock and disbelief. Immediately, she begins firing questions about Alexis’s life, her future. Head down, Lexie nearly bumps into Betsy as she texts. Lexie quickly pockets her phone. But as they climb onto the bus, she begins to read Alexis’s response about her happy, successful life in Chicago in the year 2040.
Open Loop: Should Lexie believe these emails?
Mystery: How did Alexis end up in Chicago?
Empathy/Distress: Lexie has to start keeping secrets from her best friend.
Payoff:
Irony: By connecting with Alexis, Lexie begins to lose her friend in her own timeline.
Setup: Lexie’s desire to become more like Alexis.
CUT TO 2040 REALITY:
INT. CHICAGO DEPARTMENT STORE — DAY: Secret Identity
Alexis, in uniform, is re-folding men’s dress shirts at the checkout counter. Sterling sweeps past and drops a stack of flyers on the counter, messing up Alexis’s folding. She makes no apology but instead proceeds to rub her recent sales in Alexis’s face and then swoops in to steal a menswear sale from Alexis. Brett swings by the desk to say hello and flirt with Alexis on his way to the shoe department. Before he can finish asking her out, Alexis walks away in disgust.
Open Loop: Will Alexis ever put Sterling in her place? Will Brett ever have a shot of winning over Alexis?
Mystery: Why doesn’t Alexis have any friends?
Empathy/Distress: Alexis seems unhappy at a job with people she can’t stand.
Payoff:
Irony: Alexis has told Lexie she is happy and successful at work, but clearly she is not.
Setup: competition between Alexis and Sterling; Brett’s pursuit of Alexis
INT. TRAIN — EVENING: Wound
Alexis is sitting on a train on her way home, alone. A mother with a baby wrapped in a sling against her chest smiles at Alexis as she takes a seat across the aisle from her. Alexis instantly turns away.
Open Loop: Why does Alexis present her life so differently to Lexie?
Mystery: Why is Alexis so cold? Does she have a problem with mothers and/or babies?
Empathy/Distress: Alexis’s standoffishness creates a lonely life for herself.
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup:
INT. ALEXIS’S STUDIO APARTMENT — EVENING: Wound
Alexis walks into her apartment. She drops her bag, keys, and a stack of mail on the counter and looks around at the bare walls. She opens her refrigerator. Empty. Alexis walks out of the kitchen.
Open Loop:
Mystery: Why is Alexis so alone? Has she always been?
Empathy/Distress: Alexis’s standoffishness creates a lonely life for herself.
Payoff:
Irony: Lexie thinks Alexis is happy and successful, but this is the reality.
Setup: provides a reason Alexis seeks a change
INT. ALEXIS’S BATHROOM — EVENING: Hidden Agenda
Alexis opens her medicine cabinet and takes out a bottle. She studies the label, contemplating. Then she hears her email ping from the bedroom. She sets the bottle down on the sink and walks out.
Open Loop: Will Alexis kill herself?
Mystery: What has happened to bring her to the point of giving up?
Empathy/Distress: Alexis is so miserably alone she’s contemplating suicide.
Payoff:
Irony: Alexis has told Lexie she has a wonderful life, but really she’s so unhappy she’s on the verge of ending it.
Setup: provides a reason Alexis seeks a change
INT. ALEXIS’S BEDROOM — EVENING: Strange Behavior
Alexis walks into the bedroom and leans over her computer to view the screen. She sees Lexie’s email, skims it, and snorts skeptically. She walks back out of the bedroom.
Open Loop: What will Alexis do with Lexie’s email?
Mystery: Why is Alexis so skeptical?
Empathy/Distress: Distress for Lexie: yet one more person is ignoring her; and this time, it’s her own future self
Payoff:
Irony: As a teen, Lexie struggled with being ignored. As an adult, Alexis ignores everyone.
Setup: Lexie’s email plants the seed in Alexis’s mind that there might be a way to better her life
INT. ALEXIS’S KITCHEN — EVENING: Wound
Alexis picks up the stack of mail from the kitchen counter. She begins opening her mail and a birth announcement from her sister Lily falls out of one envelope. She reads it, drops the announcement back on the counter, and walks out.
Open Loop: Will Alexis try to change her life?
Mystery: Why is her sister’s news so upsetting? Why doesn’t Alexis have a family?
Empathy/Distress: Alexis has no one even as her sister is adding onto her perfect family
Payoff:
Irony: Her sister’s happy announcement brings Alexis even more misery.
Setup:
INT. ALEXIS’S BEDROOM — EVENING: Deception
Alexis sits down at her desk in front of Lexie’s email. She heaves a deep sigh and writes a response to Lexie’s email, presenting her life as happy and successful as a retail associate. She clicks send.
Open Loop: Why does Alexis lie? Will Lexie believe her? Does Alexis have ulterior motives for contacting Lexie?
Mystery: How is this cross-timeline communication possible? How did Lexie become Alexis?
Empathy/Distress: Empathy for Alexis’s misery but distress over whether or not Lexie is getting herself into a dangerous situation
Payoff: Alexis finally responds to Lexie’s email.
Irony: Lexie emails her future self because she has no one else to talk to; the one person who responds is completely lying to her
Setup: Alexis’s lies about Lexie’s future
ACT 4
INT. LEXIE’S KITCHEN — DAY: Secret
Lexie is texting Alexis during breakfast. Alexis shares shocking pieces of information about both Lily and Scott. When Lily sits down and tries to view Lexie’s screen, Lexie is quick to hide the texts. Alexis gets in trouble for texting during breakfast. She hides her phone, but her secrecy only makes her siblings more intrigued. They tease her ruthlessly about having a boyfriend.
Open Loop: Will Lexie‘s family find out about Alexis his texts?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Lexie’s siblings tease her ruthlessly.
Payoff:
Irony: The only time her siblings seem to pay attention to Lexie is when she doesn’t want them to.
Setup: Lexie is starting to keep secrets.
EXT. OUTSIDE LEXIE’S HOUSE — DAY: Deception
Lexie meets Betsy and Marcus again to wait for the school bus. Marcus steps out into the road and nearly gets hit by a car. Betsy rescues him. Lexie is so busy texting Alexis again that she barely notices. Betsy asks who Lexie is texting but Lexie hides her messages from Betsy too. Lexie pockets the phone and changes the subject to learning how to drive. Betsy notices the sudden change in topics but engages in the conversation.
Open Loop: Will Lexie’s friendship with Betsy fall apart now that she’s started keeping secrets?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: Betsy is losing her longtime best friend.
Payoff:
Irony: The closer Lexie gets to Alexis, the further she gets from Betsy.
Setup: Marcus nearly getting hit by a car predicts a future event.
INT. LEXIE’S KITCHEN — EVENING: Wound
When Lexie enters the kitchen after school, Amanda, her mom, is sitting at the kitchen table helping Lily with her college applications. Lexie hems and haws until she gets up the nerve to ask about driver’s ed. Amanda says they can’t afford it and she is too busy to teach her. Lexie suggests Dad but Amanda instantly shuts down that idea. Deflated, Lexie walks out of the kitchen.
Open Loop: Who will teach Lexie how to drive?
Mystery: Why does Amanda seem to care so much more about Lily than she does Lexie?
Empathy/Distress: Lexie‘s mom has time for her sister but not for Lexie.
Payoff:
Irony:
Setup: Lexie not knowing how to drive sets up a future event.
INT. LILY’S BEDROOM — EVENING: Strange Behavior / Wound
Lexie sneaks into Lily’s bedroom. She opens up Lily’s laptop to her college application essay. After a momentary hesitation, Lexie begins rewriting a large portion of the essay to make her sister sound like a clown. Then she resubmits the essay, closes the laptop, and hurries out.
Open Loop: Will Lily still get accepted to her first-choice college now that Lexie‘s messed up her application?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: empathy for Lily having her application tampered with; empathy for Lexie being ignored
Payoff: The backlash of Lexie being ignored for too long
Irony: Lexie is mad at her parents but she takes it out on her sister
Setup: part of the reason Lily does not go to college
INT. LEXIE’S BEDROOM — EVENING: Conspiracy
Lexie is lying in bed feeling guilty. She texts Alexis, who already knows what Lexie has done. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self. Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think.
Open Loop: Will Alexis‘s advice help Lexie? Does Alexis have an ulterior motive?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: empathy for Alexis who is feeling guilty
Payoff:
Irony: Lexie is trusting in someone who may not be entirely trustworthy.
Setup: The impetus for Lexie starting to trust Alexis and to change
ACT 5
MONTAGE
INT. SCHOOL BUS — DAY: Strange Behavior
Lexie gets onto the school bus. The bus driver calls Lexie the wrong name again and this time she turns around and corrects him. The bus driver shows her respect and she takes her seat, happy.
Open Loop:
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress:
Payoff: Lexie is already growing from Alexis’s advice.
Irony:
Setup: Lexie is learning to speak up for herself.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL HALLWAY — DAY: Strange Behavior
Lexie is standing at her open locker. The mean girls walk past Lexie and snicker at her outfit. Lexie slams her locker shut. She walks up to them and introduces herself. She tells them she can see into the future and makes a less-than-desirable prediction for each. The girls hurry away.
Open Loop: is Lexie‘s prediction about these three girls true?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: distress that Lexie is facing mean girls again
Payoff: Lexie is already growing from Alexis’s advice.
Irony: Lexie is pretending to have an ability she actually could have with Alexis‘s help.
Setup: Lexie starts to see the benefit of knowing other people’s futures, not just her own.
EXT. HIGH SCHOOL FIELD — DAY: Strange Behavior
Field hockey girls in gym class run past. Lexie is actually keeping up with them. They pass the ball to her. Lexie seems to actually be enjoying herself.
Open Loop: is Lexie finally getting accepted into a group?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress:
Payoff: Lexie is already growing from Alexis’s advice.
Irony: When Lexie stops caring what other people think, she starts enjoying her life more.
Setup:
INT. HIGH SCHOOL CLASSROOM — DAY: Strange Behavior
Lexie is standing behind a podium in speech class. She wraps up her speech to applause from the audience. The speech teacher asks if she’s considered trying out for the fall musical. With a wry smile, she tells him yes.
Open Loop:
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress:
Payoff: Lexie is already growing from Alexis’s advice.
Irony: The speech teacher suggests Lexie audition for the fall musical, which she already did and made a fool of herself in.
Setup: Lexie may someday make a pretty persuasive speaker.
INT. HIGH SCHOOL SCIENCE LAB — DAY: Strange Behavior / Hidden Layer
Lexie is working at a lab station in biology. Tony, the cute boy, catches her eye and smiles at her. Lexie shyly smiles back.
Open Loop: Will Lexie and Tony get together?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress: The awkwardness of first attraction
Payoff: Lexie is already growing from Alexis’s advice.
Irony: When Lexie stops caring what people think, people like her even more.
Setup: Lexie and Tony’s future relationship
INT. HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA FOOD LINE — DAY: Strange Behavior
Lexie steps up to the food line. The cafeteria lady tries to serve Lexie green beans and Lexie politely declines.
When the cafeteria lady ignores her and moves to dump the beans on her tray, Lexie keeps moving down the line. In Lexie’s mental replay, the cafeteria lady dumps the beans all over the counter and stares after Lexie in shock.
Open Loop: If one piece of advice could change Lexie‘s day so much, how else might Alexis’s advice impact Lexie‘s life?
Mystery:
Empathy/Distress:
Payoff: Lexie is already growing from Alexis’s advice.
Irony: Lexie’s imagination that normally makes her feel worse about a situation can also make her feel even more confident about a situation.
Setup:
MONTAGE END
INT. HIGH SCHOOL CAFETERIA — DAY: Hidden Layer
Lexie finds a seat and waves a surprised Betsy over. Betsy notices there is something different about Lexie. Lexie speaks up when Betsy begins getting too tactless. She smiles, proud of herself as Betsy’s brow furrows in confusion. The two friends are even now starting to grow apart.
Open Loop: Will Lexie and Betsy‘s friendship survive these changes in Lexie?
Mystery: Why isn’t Lexie more open with her best friend Betsy?
Empathy/Distress: Betsy is losing her childhood best friend in a place she is already struggling to fit in.
Payoff: Lexie is already growing from Alexis’s advice.
Irony: In standing up for herself, Lexie is also pushing away her sometimes tactless best friend Betsy.
Setup: The beginning of the end of Lexie and Betsy‘s longtime friendship
EXT. TRAIN STATION — EVENING: Hidden Agenda
As Alexis’s VO resumes about the importance of trust, Alexis sits down on a bench next to the man from the department store. He mentions being disappointed with the suit he purchased, saying he wishes she had been the one to sell it to him. The man implies he expected there to be more; Alexis presses him for information. When he refuses, she threatens to kill him. He calls her bluff. She kills him and boards the train home.
Open Loop: Can Alexis be trusted? If Alexis is willing to kill, is she willing to harm Lexie to get what she wants? Mystery: How did Lexie grow up to become Alexis?
Empathy/Distress: distress for Alexis that she is now communicating with and trusting in someone dangerous
Payoff: there is no more question about whether or not Alexis is trustworthy
Irony: Alexis is as dangerous as Lexie is innocent
Setup: Alexis can’t be trusted
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Megan’s Beat Sheet
What I learned doing this assignment is…that I had about 80% of my beat sheet created from our outlining process. All I really had to do was add slug lines and connect the dots.
This pilot had already come a long way and it’s not even written yet. Looking forward to continuing to elevate!
Title: DEAR FUTURE SELF
Show Concept: Lexie, a bright but overlooked middle child on the verge of running away from home, discovers she can communicate with her future self, an ability that soon transforms her into the badass undercover agent coaching her.
Inciting Incident: Lexie receives an email response from her future self.
A story = High Concept story: Lexie and Alexis’s communication and influence on one another
B story = Colleagues and Competitors: Lexie’s competition with her siblings / Alexis’s competition with Sterling and avoidance of Brett
C story = Other relationships: Betsy’s competition with Cerise / the effects of Dylan‘s alcoholism on his family / Cerise’s lies and learning to heal, open up, and trust again
BEAT SHEET
TEASER
INT. Elegant LA Restaurant — Night
An undercover Lexie busts a Hollywood box office bribe. Looks in the mirror on her way out.
INT. Lexie’s Bedroom — Day
Lexie’s reflection replaces Alexis’s as Lexie eagerly checks her first day of school outfit in the mirror. Alexis’s VO about the importance of trust. In her hurry, Lexie breaks her necklace chain.
EXT. Outside Lexie’s House — Day
Lexie meets up with Betsy and Betsy’s younger brother Marcus outside. Betsy criticizes Lexie‘s first day of school outfit.
ACT 1
INT. School Bus — Day
The bus driver asks the girls their names. He mishears Lexie. She is too flustered to correct him.
INT. High School Hallway — Day
Mean girls walk past Lexie and snicker at her outfit.
INT. High School Gymnasium — Day
Lexie is gasping as she tries to keep up with the rest of the students running laps. PE teacher blows his whistle at her.
INT. High School Classroom — Day
The speech teacher calls Lexie to the front of the room. She approaches fearfully. After an awkward silence and snickers from students, she runs out of the classroom.
INT. High School Cafeteria Food Line — Day
Cafeteria lady gives her green beans after she says she doesn’t want them.
INT. High School Cafeteria — Day
Cafeteria is noisy, crowded, nowhere to sit. A mean student steals her chair before she can sit down. Lexie sets her tray down and leaves the cafeteria without eating.
INT. Lexie’s Dining Room — Evening
Lexie feels shut out by her family. Her older sister Lily and younger brother Scott are happy and successful and have the full attention of mom and dad. Dylan’s alcoholism revealed.
INT. Lexie’s Bedroom — Evening
Lexie looks around at her plain walls. She looks down at her blank phone. She pulls an overnight bag out of her closet and tosses it onto her bed.
ACT 2
INT. High School Cafeteria — Day
Cafeteria is noisy, crowded. Betsy walks in tray in hand and looks around for Lexie.
INT. High School Library — Day
Lexie is sitting on the floor in the stacks reading a novel and eating a PBJ. Meets Cerise; they hit it off. Betsy comes in with her cafeteria tray. Instant tension between her and Cerise. Cerise leaves and Lexie admits she’s thinking about leaving home. Betsy convinced her she just needs to find something of her own to make her special.
MONTAGE
INT. High School Science Lab — Day
Lexie spills owl pellets on a cute boy (Tony) and Betsy sets something on fire.
INT. High School Gymnasium — Day
Lexie falls on her head attempting a cartwheel and Betsy tells off the rude cheerleaders who laugh at her.
INT. High School Library — Day
Lexie and Betsy sit in a circle with other students, books in hand. Lexie is listening raptly; Betsy falls asleep.
INT. High School Auditorium Stage — Day
Fall musical auditions. Betsy can’t sing and Lexie runs away in terror only to fall offstage.
MONTAGE ENDS
INT. High School Classroom — Day
Lexie is still icing her elbow and kids in the classroom are still taunting her when their English teacher gives the class an assignment: to write an email to their future selves.
INT. Lexie’s Dining Room — Evening
Tense family dinner. Dylan is clearly drunk, irritable. Rages against the government and the corrupt voting system. Amanda clearly disgusted with her husband. No one seems interested in Lexie’s brand-new-to-high-school experiences.
INT. Lexie’s Bedroom — Evening
Lexie sits down at her desk. She fires off her email to her future self and clicks send.
INT. Lexie’s Bedroom — The Next Morning
Lexie wakes up to an email response from her future self.
ACT 3
INT. Lexie’s Bedroom — Day
Lexie is in shock and disbelief. She asks questions about Alexis’s life in Chicago in the year 2040. Time to leave for school. Lexie asks to move the conversation to messenger. Alexis presents her life as happy and successful.
CUT TO 2040 REALITY:
INT. Chicago Department Store — Day
Alexis, in uniform, is refolding men’s dress shirts at the checkout counter when Sterling sweeps past and drops a stack of fliers on the counter, messing up Alexis’s folding. Asks Alexis if she’s made any progress. Brett swings by to say hello and flirt with Alexis on his way to the shoe department. She responds coolly.
INT. Train — Evening
Alexis rides the train home alone, shutting people out.
INT. Alexis’s Studio Apartment — Evening
Alexis’s home life is empty and lonely. Bare walls. Empty fridge.
INT. Alexis’s Bathroom — Evening
Alexis opens her medicine cabinet. Takes out a bottle. Thinks about it. She hears a beep in the bedroom and sets the bottle down on the sink.
INT. Alexis’s Bedroom — Evening
Alexis sees Lexie’s email. Skeptical. Ignores it and goes to bed.
INT. Chicago Department Store — Day
Just as Alexis is about to make a sale, Sterling sweeps in and steals it. Brett makes another pass at Alexis.
INT. Train — Evening
Alexis rides the train alone, shutting people out.
INT. Alexis’s Studio Apartment Kitchen — Evening
Alexis opens her mail and a birth announcement from her sister Lily falls out.
INT. Alexis’s Bedroom — Evening
Alexis sits down in front of Lexie’s email and writes a response: presenting her life as happy and successful as a retail associate.
ACT 4
INT. Lexie’s Kitchen — Day
Lexie is texting Alexis during breakfast. Quick to hide her texts from family. Alexis shocks Lexie with the things she knows about her and her family.
EXT. Lexie’s Front Yard — Day
Lexie meets Betsy and Marcus again to wait for the bus. Betsy stops Marcus from running into the road. Betsy asks Lexie who she’s texting. Lexie hides her messages from Betsy. Betsy mentions driver’s Ed.
INT. Lexie’s Kitchen — Evening
Amanda, Lexie’s mom, is sitting at the kitchen table helping Lily with college applications. Lexie mentions driver’s Ed. They can’t afford it and Amanda is too busy to teach her. Lexie suggests her dad. Instant no.
INT. Lily’s Bedroom — Evening
Lexie sneaks in and opens up Lily’s college application essay on her laptop. She changes a large portion of the essay, resubmits, and hurries out.
INT. Lexie’s Bedroom — Evening
Lexie is lying in bed feeling guilty. She texts Alexis, who already knows what Lexie had done. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self. Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think.
ACT 5
MONTAGE
INT. School Bus — Day
Bus driver calls Lexie the wrong name. Lexie corrects him.
INT. High School Hallway — Day
Mean girls walk past Lexie and snicker at her outfit. Lexie walks right past them.
EXT. High School Field — Day
Lexie plays field hockey and enjoys it.
INT. High School Classroom — Day
Lexie wraps up a speech to applause, smiles, and returns to her seat.
INT. High School Science Lab — Day
Lexie smiles at a cute boy (Tony) in biology class.
INT. High School Cafeteria Food Line — Day
Cafeteria lady tries to give her green beans but she speaks up, kindly but firmly.
MONTAGE END
INT. High School Cafeteria — Day
Lexie finds a seat and waves a surprised Betsy over. Betsy comments that Lexie seems to be having a better day. Lexie speaks up when Betsy begins getting too tactless. Lexie smiles, happy, proud of herself.
EXT. Train Station — Evening
As Alexis’s VO resumes about the importance of trust, she sits down on a bench next to someone. They have a terse, coded conversation. Lies. Alexis threatens to kill him. He calls her bluff. She kills him and boards the train home.
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Megan’s Setting Up The Future
What I learned doing this assignment is… that in order to prepare for the future of my series, I need to include those open loops now, in the pilot. Anything I can set up now I should, especially if it’s related to the main problem of the series.
On a side note, listening to the audio from Hal’s conversation on mystery and open loops, as well as the Q & A that followed, gave me the lightbulb moment I needed to figure out why my teaser wasn’t working. I replanned it with a greater focus on action and on making the genre clear.
Events/character reveals/under-the-surface info that COULD be set up in the pilot:
Dylan’s alcoholism (Lexie’s father)
Betsy’s protective nature in regards to her friendship with Lexie
Revise the teaser to clarify genre and add action: Alexis as an undercover agent of financial crimes
Competition with Sterling
Brett’s flirtation with Alexis
Intro Cerise
Intro Betsy’s little brother Marcus
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Megan’s Adding Empathy/Distress!
What I learned doing this assignment is…that I can still increase empathy and distress for my characters even in writing comedy. This realization was a breakthrough moment for me; I was able to accomplish the goals of this lesson while also rediscovering my comedic voice that I was previously missing in my planning for this series.
Empathy and distress increases audience engagement in the series. Increasing pain or raising the stakes does not necessarily have to equal increasing the drama. It’s just one way to make the characters more human and endearing.
Crucible: High school; it’s a fact of life all must suffer through
Betrayal: Lexie faces the ultimate betrayal: her future self lies to her.
Forced Decision: Alexis’s job forces her to do things Lexie would never do. At what point does she change and why?
Hurt Those They Love: To make her life better now, Alexis must at times hurt her former self or put her in harm’s way.
Emotional Dilemma: Lexie: run away or accept Alexis’s help; Alexis: commit suicide or change with Lexie’s help
Exposed: Alexis’s true identity; Lexie’s heartless streak
Must Make Decisions with Future Consequences: Everything Lexie does that’s different from what she would have normally done has the potential to change Alexis’s life in the future—for good or bad.
PILOT OUTLINE
TEASER:
Essence: Lexie getting dressed. It’s her first day of high school. She is eager and optimistic. Seems confident. Checking her outfit and appearance in the mirror.
Possibly recording herself on her first day of high school? Alexis, however, is the VO we hear, reflecting on the importance of trust.
Undeserved misfortune: Lexie’s gold necklace breaks or the chain gets knotted as she puts it on (symbol: how valuable and how easily broken or tangled trust can become)
Turning Point: Lexie walks outside to meet her childhood best friend Betsy, who makes a tactless comment about the outfit Lexie spent so much time putting together. (External character conflict: with her best friend)
Reveal: Lexie’s confidence deflates like a popped balloon.
Sub-Mystery: Why does Lexie stay friends with Betsy, who is completely different from her and has no filter?
Sub-Open Loop: How will bright but socially awkward Lexie do in high school where lots of people are like Betsy?
ACT 1:
Essence: Lexie feels terrified at high school. The bus driver gets her name wrong. Mean girls make fun of her outfit. Gym class exhausts her. Speech class petrifies her. Cafeteria lady gives her green beans after she says she doesn’t want them. Cafeteria is noisy, crowded, nowhere to sit. A mean student steals her chair before she can sit down. Lexie leaves the cafeteria without eating.
Back at home, Lexie feels shut out by her family. Her older sister and younger brother are happy and successful and have the full attention of mom and dad. (External character conflict)
Sub-Mystery: Why is Lexie so overlooked by her family?
Sub-Open Loop: Will Lexie ever come out of her shell and figure out how to navigate high school?
Turning Point: Reveal: Back in her room, Lexie packs a bag and searches bus times, clearly contemplating running away from home.
ACT 2:
Essence: Lexie disappears during lunch.
Sub-Mystery: Where is Lexie hiding? Why?
Essence: Betsy finds her hiding out in the library. Lexie tells her about home and that she’s considering running away. Betsy thinks running away doesn’t solve anything; references her deadbeat dad. Lexie just needs to find a way to be special in her own right.
Plans that failed: Betsy tries to help Lexie find her own way to be “special” and only increases both of their humiliation. Montage: chem club (Lexie spills owl pellets on a cute boy and Betsy sets something on fire) cheer tryouts (Lexie falls on her head attempting a cartwheel and Betsy tells off the rude cheerleaders who laugh at her), book club (Lexie likes it, Betsy falls asleep), musical tryouts (Betsy can’t sing and Lexie runs away in terror only to fall offstage)
Essence: Lexie is still icing her elbow and kids in the classroom are still taunting both of them when their English teacher gives the class an assignment: to write an email to their future selves.
Midpoint: After a particularly neglectful family dinner in which no one seems interested in her brand-new to high school experiences, (External character conflict) (Brings her wound present), Lexie not only writes the email but clicks send. In the morning, she’s surprised to find a response.
ACT 3:
Essence: Plot intruding on life: Lexie probes to figure out if the email is real. She asks questions about Alexis’s life in Chicago in the year 2040. Alexis presents her life as happy and successful. But while she is a success at work, she doesn’t enjoy it: she treats people coolly, endures constant stress, nosy coworkers, pressure from her boss, competition from Sterling, and innuendos from Brett (External character conflicts)
Sub-Mystery: Why does Alexis stay at a job she clearly hates? Why did Alexis become so cold? Why is Sterling so competitive with Alexis?
Sub-Open Loop: Will Brett ever win over Alexis the ice queen? Will Alexis ever leave her job?
Reveal: Alexis’s home life is empty and lonely. So empty she nearly commits suicide one night (Plans that failed). The same night she receives Lexie’s email (Plot intruding on life).
Sub-Mystery: Why is life so bad that Alexis contemplated suicide?
Turning Point: At first, Alexis blows off Lexie’s email. Then she opens her mail and sees a birth announcement from her sister Lily. (Brings her wound present) Lily is adding to her family while Alexis has nothing and no one. Alexis decides to try to change her present by fixing her past. She begins emailing Lexie, ostensibly to help Lexie improve her life, but actually to better her present by fixing her past.
Sub-Open Loop: Will interacting with her past self improve Alexis’s present misery?
ACT 4:
Essence: Plot intruding on life: Alexis shocks Lexie with the things she knows about her and her family. Lexie isn’t sure whether or not she believes Alexis. Betsy is excited to begin driver’s ed.
External character conflict: Lexie feels overlooked again by her mother, who doesn’t have time to teach her how to drive because she’s too busy helping her older sister with college applications (Brings her wound present)
Sub-Mystery: If Lily is so smart, why does she need her mom’s help with her applications?
Sub-Open Loop: Will Lexie learn to drive? Who will have time to teach her?
Turning Point: To take her sister down a peg, Lexie messes with Lily’s college application essay.
Sub-Open Loop: Will Lily still get accepted into her first-choice college? Will she find out that Lexie changed her essay?
Reveal: Plot intruding on life: Alexis knows about Lexie’s deception, moments after it happens. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self. Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think.
ACT 5:
Essence: Plot intruding on life: Lexie goes through a school day applying Alexis’s advice: corrects the bus driver who gets her name wrong, actually enjoys game of field hockey in gym class, delivers a speech without throwing up, speaks up to the cafeteria worker who tries to give her green beans, finds a seat in the cafeteria for herself and Betsy, speaks up when Betsy begins getting too tactless. For the first time this school year, Lexie actually enjoys school and it’s all thanks to Alexis.
Conspiracy: Lexie keeps the emails from her future self a secret from her friends and family.
Deception: Alexis lets Lexie think she has a career in retail.
Main Open Loop: Can Lexie and Alexis help each other improve their lives?
Lock In: Return to Alexis’s VO about the value and importance of trust. Lexie is starting to trust Alexis, but the final scene reveals what Alexis really is: an undercover agent.
Twist Reveal: After convincing Lexie she’s trustworthy, Alexis goes out and completes a mission in which she lies and kills someone (Plot intruding on life).
Sub-Mystery: Why does Alexis lie to Lexie about her job?
Sub-Open Loop: Can Lexie trust Alexis? How will Lexie continue changing under Alexis’s influence?
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Megan’s Open Loops and Mysteries
What I learned doing this assignment is…that mysteries revolve around the past while open loops propel us into the future of the season or series. Both keep an audience intrigued in your series.
I found it much easier to brainstorm a series of questions rather than the different types of intrigue.
Main Mystery: How is Lexie and Alexis’s cross-timeline communication possible?
Sub-Mysteries:
Why did Alexis become so cold?
Why was Alexis contemplating suicide?
Why was Lexie planning to run away?
How did Alexis become an undercover agent?
Who else might know about Lexie and Alexis’s emails?
Why is Lexie so overlooked by her family?
Are Lexie’s siblings Lily and Scott as perfect as they seem?
If Lily is so smart, why does she need her mom’s help with her applications?
Why does Lexie stay friends with Betsy, who is completely different from her and has no filter?
Why is Sterling so competitive with Alexis?
Why does Alexis lie to Lexie about her job?
Main Open Loop: Can Lexie and Alexis help each other improve their lives?
Sub-Open Loops:
Will Lily still get accepted into her first-choice college?
Can Lexie trust Alexis?
Will Lexie find out her future self is an undercover agent?
Will Alexis learn to connect with people on a personal level?
Will Brett ever win over Alexis the ice queen?
Will Lexie ever come out of her shell?
How will Lexie continue changing under Alexis’s influence?
Will interacting with her past self improve Alexis’s present misery?
Will their communication extend beyond email?
PILOT OUTLINE
TEASER:
Essence: Lexie getting dressed. It’s her first day of high school. She is eager and optimistic. Seems confident. Checking her outfit and appearance in the mirror. Possibly recording herself on her first day of high school? Alexis, however, is the VO we hear, reflecting on the importance of trust.
Turning Point: Lexie walks outside to meet her childhood best friend Betsy, who makes a tactless comment about the outfit Lexie spent so much time putting together.
Reveal: Lexie’s confidence deflates like a popped balloon.
Sub-Mystery: Why does Lexie stay friends with Betsy, who is completely different from her and has no filter?
Sub-Open Loop: How will bright but socially awkward Lexie do in high school?
ACT 1:
Essence: Lexie feels terrified at high school. Bus driver gets her name wrong. Cafeteria is noisy, crowded, nowhere to sit. Cafeteria lady gives her green beans after she says she doesn’t want them. Possibly a bully at school pulls a prank on her? Back at home, Lexie feels shut out by her family. Her older sister and younger brother are happy and successful and have the full attention of mom and dad.
Sub-Mystery: Why is Lexie so overlooked by her family?
Sub-Open Loop: Will Lexie ever come out of her shell?
Turning Point: Reveal: We see Lexie has been contemplating running away from home.
ACT 2:
Essence: Lexie disappears during lunch.
Sub-Mystery: Where is Lexie hiding? Why?
Essence: Betsy finds her in the library. Lexie admits to considering running away. Betsy thinks running away doesn’t solve anything; references her deadbeat dad. Lexie just needs to find a way to be special in her own way.
Essence: Lexie’s English teacher gives the class an assignment: to write an email to their future selves.
Turning Point: After a particularly tense family dinner, Lexie not only writes the email but clicks send. In the morning, she’s surprised to find a response.
ACT 3:
Essence: Lexie probes to figure out if the email is real. She asks questions about Alexis’s life. Alexis presents her life as happy and successful. But while she is a success at work, she doesn’t enjoy it: she treats people coolly, endures constant stress, nosy coworkers, pressure from her boss, competition from Sterling, and innuendos from Brett.
Sub-Mystery: Why does Alexis stay at a job she clearly hates? Why did Alexis become so cold? Why is Sterling so competitive with Alexis?
Sub-Open Loop: Will Brett ever win over Alexis the ice queen? Will Alexis ever leave her job?
Reveal: Alexis’s home life is empty and lonely. So empty she nearly commits suicide one night. The same night she receives Lexie’s email.
Sub-Mystery: Why was Alexis contemplating suicide?
Turning Point: At first, Alexis blows off the email. Until she opens her mail and sees a birth announcement from her sister. Lily is adding to her family while Alexis has nothing and no one. Alexis decides to try to change her present by fixing her past. She continues emailing Lexie, ostensibly to help Lexie improve her life, but actually to better her present by fixing her past.
Sub-Open Loop: Will interacting with her past self improve Alexis’s present misery?
ACT 4:
Essence: Alexis shocks Lexie with the things she knows about her and her family. Lexie isn’t sure whether or not she can trust Alexis.
Lexie feels overlooked again by her mother, who doesn’t have time to teach her how to drive because she’s too busy helping her older sister with college applications.
Sub-Mystery: If Lily is so smart, why does she need her mom’s help with her applications?
Sub-Open Loop: Will Lexie learn to drive? Who will have time to teach her?
Turning Point: To take her sister down a peg, Lexie messes with Lily’s college application essay.
Sub-Open Loop: Will Lily still get accepted into her first-choice college?
Reveal: Alexis knows about Lexie’s deception, moments after it happens. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self. Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think.
ACT 5:
Essence: Lexie goes through a school day applying Alexis’s advice: corrects the bus driver who gets her name wrong, speaks up to the cafeteria worker who tries to give her green beans, speaks up when Betsy gets too tactless. She also keeps the emails from her future self a secret from her friends and family. For the first time this school year, Lexie actually enjoys school and it’s all thanks to Alexis. Alexis lets Lexie think she has a career in retail.
Main Open Loop: Can Lexie and Alexis help each other improve their lives?
Lock In: Return to Alexis’s VO about the value and importance of trust. Lexie is starting to trust Alexis, but the final scene reveals what Alexis really is: an undercover agent.
Reveal: After convincing Lexie she’s trustworthy, Alexis goes out and completes a mission in which she lies and kills someone.
Sub-Mystery: Why does Alexis lie to Lexie about her job?
Sub-Open Loop: Can Lexie trust Alexis? How will Lexie continue changing under Alexis’s influence?
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Megan Stacks Intrigue
What I learned doing this assignment is…that stacking intrigue creates a greater sense of revelation for the audience at the turning point. But it definitely takes work thinking through intriguing moments that will lead to the turning point without actually giving away the turning point.
ACT 1:
Deception: Lexie pretends to be okay, but she’s not; she feels ignored, pushed around, and lonely
Wound: Lexie’s parents show more interest in her genius older sister and athletic younger brother than they do in her.
Hidden Agenda: To find something that makes her special
Act 1 Turning Point: Lexie has been contemplating running away from home.
ACT 2:
Mystery: Where does Lexie disappear to during lunch?
Conspiracy: Lexie tells Betsy about her plans to run away.
Wound: Betsy’s father ran out on their family when she was 7.
Hidden Agenda: To find a way to stand out, be special
Act 2 Turning Point: Lexie receives a response from the future.
ACT 3:
Intriguing World: Chicago 2040
Mystery: Alexis gets an email from her past self
Secret: Hiding her emails from the past from her nosy coworkers
Secret Identity: undercover operative
Wound: Alexis is completely alone and therefore lonely, though she won’t admit it
Hidden Agenda: to find a more fulfilling life by learning to connect with people again, starting with her former self
Strange Behavior: Alexis treats people coolly.
Act 3 Turning Point: Alexis receives a birth announcement from her sister and decides to continue emailing Lexie, ostensibly to help Lexie improve her life, but actually to better her present by fixing her past.
ACT 4:
Wound: Lexie’s mom taught Lily how to drive but doesn’t have time to teach Lexie. Lily acts like she’s better than Lexie.
Hidden Agenda: To take her sister down a peg
Strange Behavior: Lexie messes with Lily’s college application essay.
Act 4 Turning Point: Alexis knows what Lexie did, moments after it happens. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self. Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think.
ACT 5:
Secret: Lexie is in communication with her future self.
Deception: Alexis lets Lexie think she has a career in retail.
Conspiracy: Lexie hides her emails from her future self from her friends and family
Secret Identity: Alexis is actually an undercover operative.
Hidden Agenda: Alexis wants a more fulfilling life by learning how to connect with people again, starting with her former self
Act 5 Turning Point: After convincing Lexie she’s trustworthy, Alexis goes out and completes a mission where she lies and kills someone.
PILOT OUTLINE
TEASER:
Essence: Lexie getting dressed for the first day of school. It’s Lexie’s first day of high school. She is eager and optimistic. Seems confident. Checking her outfit and appearance in the mirror. Possibly recording herself on her first day of high school? Alexis, however, is the VO we hear, reflecting on the importance of trust.
Turning Point: Lexie walks outside to meet her childhood best friend Betsy, who makes a tactless comment about the outfit Lexie spent so much time analyzing. Reveal: Lexie’s confidence deflates like a popped balloon.
ACT 1:
Essence: Lexie feels terrified at high school and shut out at home. Bus driver gets her name wrong. Cafeteria is noisy, crowded, nowhere to sit. Cafeteria lady gives her green beans after she says she doesn’t want them. Possibly a bully at school pulls a prank on her? Back at home, older sister and younger brother are happy and successful and have the full attention of mom and dad. Lexie is portrayed as solid and reliable.
Turning Point: Reveal: We see Lexie has been contemplating running away from home.
ACT 2:
Essence: Lexie disappears during lunch. Betsy finds her in the library. Lexie admits to considering running away. Betsy thinks running away doesn’t solve anything; references her deadbeat dad. Lexie just needs to find a way to be special in her own way. Lexie’s English teacher gives the class an assignment: to write an email to their future selves.
Turning Point: After a particularly tense family dinner, Lexie not only writes the email but clicks send. In the morning, she finds she has received a response.
ACT 3:
Essence: Lexie probes to figure out if the email is real. Alexis’s email presents her as happy and successful. Reveal: Alexis is a success at work but she doesn’t enjoy it: she treats people coolly, constant stress, nosy coworkers, pressure from her boss, competition from Sterling, innuendos from Brett. Alexis’s home life is empty and lonely. So empty she nearly commits suicide.
Turning Point: Alexis receives a birth announcement from her sister. Recognizes her emptiness again and decides to try to change her present by fixing her past.
She decides to continue emailing Lexie, ostensibly to help Lexie improve her life, but actually to better her present by fixing her past.
ACT 4:
Essence: Alexis shocks Lexie with the things she knows about her. Lexie isn’t sure whether or not she can trust Alexis. Lexie feels overlooked again by her mother, who doesn’t have time to teach her how to drive because she’s too busy helping her older sister with college applications.
Turning Point: To take her sister down a peg, Lexie messes with Lily’s college application essay. She experiences instant regret. Reveal: Alexis knows about it, moments after it happens. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self. Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think.
ACT 5:
Essence: Lexie goes through a school day with this advice: corrects the bus driver who gets her name wrong, speaks up to the cafeteria worker who tries to give her green beans, speaks up when Betsy gets too tactless. She also keeps the emails from her future self a secret from her friends and family. For the first time this school year, Lexie actually enjoys school and it’s all thanks to Alexis. Alexis lets Lexie think she has a career in retail.
Lock In: Return to Alexis’s VO about the value and importance of trust. Lexie is starting to trust Alexis, but the final scene reveals what Alexis really is: an undercover agent. Reveal: After convincing Lexie she’s trustworthy, she goes out and completes a mission where she lies and kills someone.
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Megan’s Layers and Reveals
What I learned doing this assignment is…my brain hurts.
But seriously, it’s actually really difficult to come up with layers. I feel like with all the planning we’ve already done that I’m struggling to generate new ideas. I’m sure there’s more I could come up with, but for some reason, I’m just hitting a wall right now. First time for everything, I guess. I think I just need to move on for now.
Here’s at least some of the layers and reveals that I’ve already planned:
Pilot Layers/Reveals:
Surface: Lexie gets emails from her future self. At first, she thinks it’s a prank. (Sister? Betsy? Bully?)
Layer Beneath: Eventually Lexie believes the email is real, but Lexie thinks that Alexis is a successful salesperson in a department store.
How Revealed: Alexis knows that Lexie tampered with Lily’s college application.
How Revealed: Alexis describes her job as excelling in the art of persuasion.
Layer Beneath: Secret identity: We find out Alexis is actually an undercover agent. Lexie still doesn’t know.
How Revealed: At the end of the pilot, Alexis finishes interrogating someone and then shoots him.
Series Layers/Reveals:
Alexis asks Lexie to help her uncover information in the past about a crime syndicate.
Lexie finds out the crime syndicate is run by her boyfriend’s father.
Lexie finds out her boyfriend becomes the head of the crime syndicate in Alexis’s timeline.
Lexie finds out that her boyfriend is shot in the future.
The crime syndicate turns out to be the good guys, trying to stop The Six from coming to power in the US government.
Lexie finds out that her boyfriend was shot by Alexis in the future.
Lexie shoots Alexis in the future to prevent her boyfriend’s death.
Character Layers/Reveals:
Alexis seems like a well-adjusted, successful professional.
She is actually a cold, hardened undercover agent, who became that way because of her best friend’s betrayal.
Lexie has two best friends that this could apply to: Betsy or Cerise.
Cerise stole Alexis’s fiancé the night before their wedding.
Brett, who seems to be Alexis’s romantic pursuer, turns out to be Alexis’s betrayer.
He is working for the crime syndicate; spies on her and eventually kidnaps Alexis
Sterling, Alexis’s work competition, ends up saving Alexis and becoming her partner.
Sterling, who is also spying on Alexis, finds out about Brett’s surveillance; rescues Alexis
Sterling, who competes with everyone, is actually competing against her wildly successful older brothers for her father’s approval.
Sterling betrays Lexie, steals the time machine, and goes back in time to try to win her father’s approval before his death.
PILOT OUTLINE
TEASER:
Essence: Lexie getting dressed for the first day of school. It’s Lexie’s first day of high school. She is eager and optimistic. Seems confident. Checking her outfit and appearance in the mirror. Possibly recording herself on her first day of high school? Alexis, however, is the VO we hear, reflecting on the importance of trust.
Turning Point: Lexie walks outside to meet her childhood best friend Betsy, who makes a tactless comment about the outfit Lexie spent so much time analyzing. Reveal: Lexie’s confidence deflates like a popped balloon.
ACT 1:
Essence: Lexie feels terrified at high school and shut out at home. Bus driver gets her name wrong. Cafeteria is noisy, crowded, nowhere to sit. Cafeteria lady gives her green beans after she says she doesn’t want them. Possibly a bully at school pulls a prank on her? Back at home, older sister and younger brother are happy and successful and have the full attention of mom and dad. Lexie is portrayed as solid and reliable.
Turning Point: Reveal: We see Lexie has been contemplating running away from home.
ACT 2:
Essence: Lexie’s English teacher gives the class an assignment: to write an email to their future selves.
Turning Point: After a particularly tense family dinner, Lexie not only writes the email but clicks send. In the morning, she finds she has received a response.
ACT 3:
Essence: Lexie probes to figure out if the email is real. Alexis’s email presents her as happy and successful. Reveal: Alexis is a success at work but she doesn’t enjoy it: constant stress, pressure from her boss, competition from Sterling, innuendos from Brett. Alexis’s home life is empty and lonely. So empty she nearly commits suicide.
Turning Point: Alexis receives a birth announcement from her sister. Recognizes her emptiness again and decides to try to change her present by fixing her past.
She decides to continue emailing Lexie, ostensibly to help Lexie improve her life, but actually to better her present by fixing her past.
ACT 4:
Essence: Alexis shocks Lexie with the things she knows about her. Lexie isn’t sure whether or not she can trust Alexis. It might be another, more elaborate prank. Lexie feels overlooked again by her mother, who doesn’t have time to teach her how to drive because she’s too busy helping her older sister with college applications.
Turning Point: In a fit of jealousy, Lexie messes with Lily’s college application essay. She experiences instant regret. Reveal: Alexis knows about it, moments after it happens. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self. Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think.
ACT 5:
Essence: Lexie goes through a school day with this advice: corrects the bus driver who gets her name wrong, speaks up to the cafeteria worker who tries to give her green beans, speaks up when Betsy gets too tactless.
Lock In: For the first time this school year, Lexie actually enjoys school and it’s all thanks to Alexis. Return to Alexis’s VO about the value and importance of trust. Lexie is starting to trust Alexis, but the final scene reveals what Alexis really is: an undercover agent. Reveal: After convincing Lexie she’s trustworthy, she goes out and completes a mission where she lies and kills someone.
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Megan’s Character Story Lines
What I learned doing this assignment is…character storylines follow story structure just like a plot. And like a plot, a character’s storyline also needs carefully planned conflict, dilemmas, and turning points. The character storylines then get woven and layered into the plot structure.
I already knew I needed to brainstorm more of Alexis’s storyline and this assignment got me started, at least with the pilot.
CHARACTER: LEXIE
Beginning: It’s Lexie’s first day of high school. She is eager and optimistic. But her first day is terrible: she’s too afraid to speak up, the cafeteria is crowded, people are mean. At home she feels completely ignored.
Turning Point: Lexie contemplates running away.
Midpoint: Lexie gets a response to her email to her future self.
Turning Point 2: Alexis shocks Lexie with the things she knows about her.
Major Conflict: Lexie feels overlooked again by her mother, who doesn’t have time to teach her how to drive because she’s too busy helping her older sister with college applications.
Dilemma: Lexie has to choose whether or not to mess up her older sister’s college application. She does, but experiences instant regret.
Ending: Alexis reveals that she knows what Lexie did. Lexie finally believes her and takes her advice: stop caring what people think. Her next day at school goes much better.
CHARACTER: ALEXIS
Beginning: Alexis is a success at work but she doesn’t enjoy it: constant stress, pressure from her boss, competition from Sterling, innuendos from Brett.
Turning Point: Alexis’s life is empty. So empty she nearly commits suicide.
Midpoint: Alexis gets an email from her past self, Lexie. Ignores it at first.
Turning Point 2: Receives a birth announcement from her sister. Recognizes her emptiness again and decides to try to change her present by fixing her past.
Major Conflict: Alexis has to get Lexie to believe her, to trust her. But she has to do so without revealing what she actually does for a living.
Dilemma: Whether or not to be honest with Lexie
Ending: After convincing Lexie she’s trustworthy, she goes out and completes a mission where she lies and kills someone.
OUTLINE
TEASER:
Essence: Lexie getting dressed for the first day of school. It’s Lexie’s first day of high school. She is eager and optimistic. Checking her outfit and appearance in the mirror. Possibly recording herself on her first day of high school? Alexis, however, is the VO we hear, reflecting on the importance of trust.
Turning Point: Lexie walks outside to meet her childhood best friend Betsy, who makes a tactless comment about the outfit Lexie spent so much time analyzing.
ACT 1:
Essence: Lexie feels terrified at high school and shut out at home. Bus driver gets her name wrong. Cafeteria is noisy, crowded, nowhere to sit. Cafeteria lady gives her green beans after she says she doesn’t want them. Possibly a bully at school pulls a prank on her? Back at home, older sister and younger brother are happy and successful and have the full attention of mom and dad.
Turning Point: We see Lexie has been contemplating running away from home.
ACT 2:
Essence: Lexie’s English teacher gives the class an assignment: to write an email to their future selves.
Turning Point: After a particularly tense family dinner, Lexie not only writes the email but clicks send. In the morning, she finds she has received a response.
ACT 3:
Essence: Lexie probes to figure out if the email is real. Alexis’s email presents her as happy and successful. Alexis is a success at work but she doesn’t enjoy it: constant stress, pressure from her boss, competition from Sterling, innuendos from Brett. Alexis’s home life is empty and lonely. So empty she nearly commits suicide.
Turning Point: Alexis receives a birth announcement from her sister. Recognizes her emptiness again and decides to try to change her present by fixing her past.
She decides to continue emailing Lexie, ostensibly to help Lexie improve her life, but actually to better her present by fixing her past.
ACT 4:
Essence: Alexis shocks Lexie with the things she knows about her. Lexie isn’t sure whether or not she can trust Alexis. It might be another, more elaborate prank. Lexie feels overlooked again by her mother, who doesn’t have time to teach her how to drive because she’s too busy helping her older sister with college applications.
Turning Point: In a fit of jealousy, Lexie messes with Lily’s college application essay. She experiences instant regret. Alexis knows about it, moments after it happens. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self. Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think.
ACT 5:
Essence: Lexie goes through a school day with this advice: corrects the bus driver who gets her name wrong, speaks up to the cafeteria worker who tries to give her green beans, speaks up when Betsy gets too tactless.
Lock In: For the first time this school year, Lexie actually enjoys school and it’s all thanks to Alexis. Return to Alexis’s VO about the value and importance of trust. Lexie is starting to trust Alexis, but the final scene reveals what Alexis really is: an undercover agent. After convincing Lexie she’s trustworthy, she goes out and completes a mission where she lies and kills someone.
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Megan’s Pilot Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is…that it will be easier to write something that is well-planned (and therefore basically already created). I also learned that I need to become fluent in creating turning points, since they occur far more often in a show than I realized.
Still brainstorming for a more engaging teaser, but here’s what I’ve got so far.
TEASER:
Essence: Lexie getting dressed for the first day of school. Checking her outfit and appearance in the mirror. Possibly recording herself on her first day of high school? Alexis, however, is the VO we hear, reflecting on the importance of trust.
Turning Point: Lexie walks outside to meet her childhood best friend Betsy, who makes a tactless comment about the outfit Lexie spent so much time analyzing.
ACT 1:
Essence: Lexie feels terrified at high school and shut out at home. Bus driver gets her name wrong. Cafeteria is noisy, crowded, nowhere to sit. Cafeteria lady gives her green beans after she says she doesn’t want them. Possibly a bully at school pulls a prank on her? Back at home, older sister and younger brother are happy and successful and have the full attention of mom and dad.
Turning Point: We see Lexie has been contemplating running away from home.
ACT 2:
Essence: Lexie’s English teacher gives the class an assignment: to write an email to their future selves.
Turning Point: After a particularly tense family dinner, Lexie not only writes the email but clicks send. In the morning, she finds she has received a response.
ACT 3:
Essence: Lexie probes to figure out if the email is real. Alexis’s email presents her as happy and successful. But we see Alexis’s actual work environment at a department store: Brett’s heavy-handed flirtation, Sterling’s competitive sniping. Alexis’s home life is empty and lonely.
Turning Point: We realize how close Alexis had been to suicide. She decides to continue emailing Lexie, ostensibly to help Lexie improve her life, but actually to improve hers.
ACT 4:
Essence: Lexie isn’t sure whether or not she can trust Alexis. It might be another, more elaborate prank. She reminds her mom about teaching her to drive but mom is too busy helping Lily with college applications.
Turning Point: In a fit of jealousy, Lexie messes with Lily’s college application essay. Alexis knows about it, moments after it happens. Lexie finally believes Alexis is her future self.
ACT 5:
Essence: Alexis gives Lexie her first piece of advice: Stop caring what other people think. She goes through a school day with this advice: corrects the bus driver who gets her name wrong, speaks up to the cafeteria worker who tries to give her green beans, speaks up when Betsy gets too bossy.
Lock In: For the first time this school year, Lexie actually enjoys school and it’s all thanks to Alexis. Return to Alexis’s VO about the value and importance of trust. Lexie is starting to trust Alexis, but the final scene reveals what Alexis really is: an undercover agent.
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Megan’s Amazing Inciting Incident
What I learned doing this assignment is…that in my original pilot planning, I actually stopped the pilot at the midpoint, the cliffhanger when Lexie receives the email response. What my pilot was missing is the lock in. I realized that I needed Lexie to start changing by the end of the pilot in order to show why she will continue communicating with her future self: because she sees potential self-improvement through the connection (the lock in).
Intriguing Concept: Lexie, a bright but overlooked middle child on the verge of running away from home discovers she can communicate with her future self, an ability that eventually transforms her into the badass undercover agent coaching her.
Act 1: Lexie is bright but shy and fearful. High school is a terrifying place and she feels shut out by her high-achieving family.
Brainstorm ways to show:
Fearful of the noisy, crowded cafeteria
Mean cafeteria lady
Mean bus driver
Mean PE teacher
Ignored by parents who are more interested in siblings
Mom forgot to pick her up
Biology lab accident
Stolen gym shoes
Terrifying speech class
Dad doesn’t have time to teach her how to drive (her sister learned at her age)
Parents go to brother’s game instead of her parent-teacher conference
Ignored at dinner conversations
Getting bullied: grossed out by owl pellet in bio, bully puts pellet in her lunch
Friend getting bullied
Midpoint: Lexie receives a response to an email sent to her future self. At first, she’s not sure what to think.
Lock In: Lexie is able to face the fear at the end of the episode that she couldn’t face at the beginning because of the courage or advice Alexis gives her.
Finally eats lunch in the cafeteria
Stand up for her friend who is getting bullied
Stands up to mean cafeteria lady, bus driver, PE teacher, or bully
As for Alexis, her lock in to continue communicating with Lexie is it gives her lonely, empty life a purpose.
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Megan’s Big Picture Components
What I learned doing this assignment is…that while it may seem repetitive, it’s important to keep reminding myself of the core of what my show is about. It’s also an opportunity to consider if any of these basic items could still be elevated. Like a writer’s room, I should never stop looking for ways to make the show better.
Currently, the one area of my big picture components I still want to elevate is the World, in particular, Lexie’s world.
SERIES INFO:
World: a small-town high school and the future: Chicago in the year 2040
Main mystery: How is Lexie and Alexis’s cross-timeline communication possible? Who is involved and what are they after?
Impossible Goal: Lexie wants to become braver and more confident and successful like Alexis. Alexis wants a more satisfying life with more meaningful interpersonal relationships.
Main Conflict: Lexie and Alexis are two completely different people who seem to be nothing alike. How can they possibly be the same person?
Second Mystery: Can Alexis be trusted? Can either Lexie or Alexis change?
Season 1 Arc: Lexie goes from overlooked and unnoticeable to an amateur investigator. Alexis goes from an ostensible sales manager to revealing she is actually an undercover operative.
Season 1 Protagonist Internal Journey: Lexie goes from pushover enabler to initiator. Alexis goes from detached, confident sales management to becoming slightly more open and honest and admitting who she really is: an undercover operative.
PILOT INFO:
Pilot Conflict: Lexie’s struggles to fit into both high school and her own family. Alexis’s struggles with one competitive coworker and another amorous coworker.
Characters Introduced: Lexie Abbott, Betsy Sullivan, Lily Abbott, Scott Abbott, Amanda Abbott, Dylan Abbott, Alexis Abbott, Sterling Zheng, Brett Hall, Miss Parker, Mrs. McNeil
Inciting Incident of Season 1: Lexie receives a response to her email from her future self.
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Megan’s Visually Appealing Bible
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I don’t have enough experience with Adobe to be able to photoshop pictures to the extent needed to make a visually appealing Bible. I did brainstorm a few ideas of what I would try to do if I could.
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Megan’s Edited TV Pitch Bible
What I learned doing this assignment is…that detailed doesn’t have to mean verbose. Ultimately, my TV Pitch Bible should be clear, quick, and compelling.
After the last lesson on titles, however, I ended up creating brief episode descriptions with each title for all 5 seasons, not just Season 1, giving me a much better idea of the overall story arc but adding another few pages in length.
For this lesson, I went back over my TV Pitch Bible and noticed my main problem is length. With each pass, I found myself asking, What else can I cut? Several passes later, I’m still at 14 pages.
If anyone would like to swap pitch bibles and provide feedback, I’d be happy to participate!
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Megan’s Episode Titles
What I learned doing this assignment is…it’s like I always tell my students: titles matter! I found that as I was brainstorming titles, I was also reconsidering pacing, episode content and organization within a season, and the episode descriptions.
I’m still unsure whether I should have complete episode descriptions for all five seasons in my TV Pitch Bible or just for Season 1. Can anyone clarify?
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Megan Presents Non-Stop Intrigue
What I learned doing this assignment is…that it is important that every single line in my TV Pitch Bible be at optimum levels to intrigue a reader. The first time I read over my Pitch Bible, I underlined every sentence that seemed dull or cliche. The most glaring holes I noticed were in the Episode 1 descriptions. Many of these read more like summaries than pitches and included a little too much B and C storyline. I created a document just for my Pitch Bible cuts (in case I needed the information in the future) and began to cut back on the descriptions, trying to focus on hook, character journey, and cliffhanger. I know these are still in rough draft form, but they seem to read a little better now.
My plan is to go through multiple more read-throughs like this one.
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Megan’s Intrigue Patterns
What I learned doing this assignment is… that using the intrigue patterns becomes easier with practice. It’s definitely helpful having an example for each pattern. I can also see the value in rewriting each sentence in the TV Pitch Bible for maximum intrigue, but it is going to take a good bit of time.
For this assignment, I ended up using a mishmash of several of these lines to rewrite my original line.
ORIGINAL LINE: Lexie soon finds herself in a world of intrigue and conspiracy when everything she thought she knew about her future self disintegrates before her eyes.
NEW LINE: And then Lexie makes the ultimate discovery: that Alexis has been lying about her true identity. She is actually an undercover agent! Now she isn’t sure what to believe and whether or not she can really trust Alexis. If Alexis is willing to lie to Lexie about her profession, what else has she lied to her about?
A. Establish something shocking and point to the terrible things it could mean.
Backstabbed by her future self, Lexie finds out the truth: that Alexis is actually an undercover agent. Now, Lexie is questioning everything Alexis has ever told her.
B. Strong statement; question about something underhanded beneath the surface.
Lexie had thought she’d found a friend and mentor only to discover it was all a lie: her future self is actually an undercover agent. Now Lexie isn’t sure what to believe and whether or not she can really trust Alexis.
C. Question that points to hidden agendas, hidden identity, conspiracy, etc..
Lexie discovers that Alexis has been lying about her true identity: she is actually an undercover agent. What led her to this profession? And why didn’t she tell Lexie about it right away? Is it possible that Alexis is using Lexie to further her own career?
D. Character 1 is convinced/worried/wondering that Character 2 has done _____________.
Lexie finds out her future self is even more exciting than she had previously realized: Alexis is actually an undercover agent. But now Lexie wonders why Alexis never told her.
E. But maybe it is all wrong.
Lexie thought she would be excited to find out her future self is a complete badass: a real undercover agent! But if Lexie is this excited to learn the truth, why wasn’t Alexis open about the fact to begin with?
F. A Pattern that Leads to Future Consequences
Alexis wouldn’t elaborate on Cerise’s future betrayal. She refused to explain to Lexie why her friendship with Betsy would eventually fall apart. She wouldn’t even provide any information about how or when their father would die. All the secrets suddenly make sense when Lexie finds out the biggest secret of all: that Alexis is actually an undercover agent. What else is she hiding?
G. If he does ________________, that means ___Intrigue_____.
If Alexis is willing to lie to Lexie about her profession, what else has she lied to her about?
H. State the mystery.
If Alexis is really trustworthy, why didn’t she tell Lexie she’s an undercover agent from the very beginning?
I. Should be/could be _______, but it is even worse.
It should be exciting to know the truth: that her future self is a badass secret agent! But now Lexie wonders what else Alexis may have been keeping from her.
J. Intense language.
Lexie has spent the last several months getting to know her future self only to discover she doesn’t really know Alexis at all. Now that she’s discovered that Alexis is actually an undercover agent, will Lexie ever be able to trust Alexis again?
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Megan’s Revised Show Summary – Draft 2
After the investigation in Mod 2, Lesson 7, I rewrote the show summary in my TV Pitch Bible. I still don’t think I’ve included enough intriguing details from all five seasons but at least now the summary focuses on both Lexie and Alexis’s transformational journeys. My only wonder is, is it too long?
Show Summary
Freshman Lexie Abbott could disappear and few people would notice. Though she loves reading about adventure and romance, nothing exciting ever seems to happen in her own life. Overshadowed by a genius older sister and an athletic younger brother, Lexie feels so unnoticed at home that she’s on the verge of running away. Then an uninspired English assignment yields a surprise: her email sent to her future self comes back with a response! A cool, confident, successful professional living in Chicago, Alexis is everything socially awkward Lexie someday hopes to become.
On the surface, Alexis seems to have life all figured out, but inwardly she is empty, alone, and miserable. A jaded workaholic, she battles one coworker who constantly undermines her in front of her boss and another who makes no secret of his strong sexual attraction to her. With little real purpose in life, Alexis decides to help transform her pathetic younger self in the hopes of improving her own current life.
As the two continue communicating, Alexis’s influence stimulates Lexie to become more courageous. She begins trying things that previously scared her: making new friends, joining a club, asking her crush out on a date, sneaking out of the house, skipping school, driving a car without a license. But how far will her risk-taking go? Who is Alexis really? And can Lexie trust everything Alexis tells her?
Lexie’s life isn’t the only one that begins changing. Alexis finds that interacting with Lexie provides a softening influence. For the first time, Alexis is noticing the things in life she’s missed out on: friends, family, pets, love, marriage, babies, holidays, vacations. Can Alexis maintain the edge she needs to excel in a competitive work environment with Lexie reminding her of all the things she’s given up?
The ultimate question, though, is how is this cross-timeline communication possible? Lexie and Alexis discover that both the government and a notorious crime syndicate are involved and that their connection extends beyond email. Lexie soon finds herself in a world of intrigue and conspiracy when everything she thought she knew about her future self disintegrates before her eyes.
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Megan’s TV Pitch Bible Investigation
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I like brainstorming on my laptop rather than on my phone. It’s easier for me to keep up with the speed of my thoughts. I also noticed that these tools are really interwoven; both the digging tool and wondering tool naturally led back to extrapolation
Because of this investigation, I happened upon two major breakthroughs. First, I need to write a summary that goes beyond just the pilot or the first season and incorporate more of the cliffhangers and character journey of the entire show. Second, I need to rewrite each of my episodes focusing not only on what Lexie is living through in her timeline, but what Alexis is going through in hers. The hard part will be keeping Alexis’s real job a secret until the last episode of season one.
I feel like I could keep investigating these questions and more, but since I’m already a couple lessons behind, I’ll stop here for now.
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Megan’s Show Summary
What I learned doing this assignment is…that I’ve already identified most of these elements previously, so pulling together a summary was much simpler than I expected. Currently, the summary feels a bit superficial and basic, though. In future drafts I also want to infuse some humor into the summary to make my genre and voice evident even in the TV Pitch Bible.
DEAR FUTURE SELF
30-Minute Comedy
Freshman Lexie Abbott could disappear and few people would notice. Overshadowed by a genius older sister and a socially superior younger brother, Lexie feels so unnoticed at home that she’s on the verge of running away. The situation isn’t much better at school but at least she has her childhood best friend Betsy to commiserate with.
Then an uninspired English assignment yields a surprise: her email sent to her future self comes back with a response! A cool, confident and successful professional living in Chicago, Alexis is everything socially awkward Lexie someday hopes to become. And apparently she does! Finally, Lexie has something no one else has, something to make her special: a way to communicate with her future self.
But who is Alexis really? And how is this communication possible? Can Lexie trust everything Alexis tells her?
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Megan’s Episode Descriptions
What I learned doing this assignment is…that it can be difficult to focus on only the A storyline when describing the episode. My inclination is to want to outline the entire episode with each of the separate storylines. Focusing on just the A storyline makes me wonder if my episodes are too light (which I don’t think they will be once the other storylines are added).
I know right now I have too much of my B and C storylines in this draft, but rather than keep revising and getting farther behind, I’m just going to post for now and move on.
SEASON 1: WORLDS APART
Episode 1:
When a cute boy asks painfully shy Lexie Abbott to be his biology partner, she accidentally dumps a tray of owl pellets on his lap. She runs to her favorite place in the world to hide: the school library. Her childhood best friend Betsy finds her almost immediately. Betsy’s high school experience so far hasn’t been much better; already she’s somehow made enemies with the head cheerleader. The first day of high school is tough, but for Lexie, it’s easier than home. As a middle child, Lexie is often overshadowed by her genius older sister Lily and her younger brother Scott, Mr. Popularity. Maybe if Lexie can make her mark in high school, her parents will sit up and take notice.
Day two of the hostage situation starts off a bit better when Lexie befriends quiet newcomer Cerise. She also receives a homework assignment that will unknowingly change her life: to write an email to her future self. After a tense family dinner, Lexie considers packing a bag and leaving home but instead rushes through the assignment and clicks send. Shockingly, she finds a response in her inbox the next morning.
Episode 2:
Lexie doesn’t know what to believe: is this a joke? Could she really have just received an email from her future self? But the possibility is too good to pass up. Lexie hesitantly suggests instant messaging as she leaves for school.
At school, Lexie meets up with her friend Betsy, who has dyed her hair blue and wears a bucket hat and sunglasses in an attempt to hide from her new nemesis. Margo still finds Betsy and taunts her. Lexie meets Cerise in the library and a new friendship quickly blossoms.
Back home, Lily is digging through Lexie’s desk without permission when Lexie arrives; she slams her laptop shut in time but Lily notices the bus number date and time written on a piece of paper. She figures out that Lexie was contemplating running away. Lexie agrees to extra chords to keep Lily from telling their parents.
Via IM, Alexis reveals something only Lexie would know so Lexie finally believe her. Finally, Lexie has something that makes her special: a connection to the future.
Episode 3:
Lexie gets caught several times throughout the school day texting Alexis, but Alexis ia such a wealth of information. She asks about her sister and brother, about college and her life in Chicago.
Lexie invites Betsy and Cerise home after school. When they arrive, Lexie finds her dad sitting on the porch extremely drunk at 3 o’clock in the afternoon. Embarrassed, Lexie apologizes to the girls and tries to help her dad sober up.
Later, she texts Alexis about her dad’s drinking and receives a cryptic rely. Then she calls Cerise, but Cerise’s father answers the phone, saying Cerise can’t take calls after 9PM. Lexie also learns that Cerise mother isn’t really on a business trip; she died recently of cancer.
Episode 4:
Lexie still frequently IMs Alexis throughout her day. Lexie mentions meeting Cerise and Alexis’s stops messaging. Lexie is waiting for Cerise before school; asks if her dad mentioned she called. Cerise opens up a little about her overprotective dad. Lexie tries to prod Cerise into admitting the truth about her mother but she doesn’t.
After school, Scott grabs Lexie as soon as she steps into the house, urging her to take a phone call pretending to be their mother. With no time to refuse, Lexie does this favor for Scott and learns that he’s been skipping his history class. When she asks Scott about it, he evades her questions.
The next day at lunch, Betsy asks Lexie why she’s so quiet; not wanting to spill her own secret about Alexis, Lexie tells Betsy what she learned about Cerise’s mother. When Cerise sits down, Betsy just blurts out the truth, causing Cerise to shut down and storm away from both of them.
Episode 5:
It’s been radio silence for Lexie from both Alexis and Cerise; Lexie seems to lose friends more quickly than she makes them. Things at school finally seem to be looking up for Betsy, though; the girl’s varsity basketball coach saw her playing basketball during PE and asked Betsy to come to varsity basketball tryouts.
Feeling completely alone, Lexie tries turning to her sister, who is too busy studying for her second attempt at a perfect score on the SAT. Scott is spending more and more time away from home. Lexie’s dad is usually drinking and her mom is working. Finally, however, Lexie gets a response from Alexis, who reveals that Cerise will betray Lexie but doesn’t tell her how. It’s at that moment that Cerise shows up at Lexie’s door to apologize for lying and start over. Can Lexie trust her?
Episode 6:
Cerise invited Betsy to her first art show; the only problem is that it’s the same night as Betsy’s first varsity basketball game. Lexie has to choose between her two friends; Alexis is no help, providing only cryptic details about the future of both friendships.
In the end, Lexie tries to do both, going to the art show first and then the basketball game just after half time.
Lily is also at the game. She gets a call from Dylan from the bar; Lily refuses to leave the game to get him. She passes the phone off to Lexie. He asks Lexie to pick him up even though she doesn’t have her license. Lexie rushes to his rescue; Betsy looks up from the court to see her driver leaving shortly after arriving. Cerise goes with her. Betsy’s eyes narrow.
Episode 7:
On the walk to school, Betsy demands to know where Lexie disappeared to; not wanting to out her father, Lexie evades. Betsy is clearly hurt but still invites Lexie to her next game. Lexie is taking a different route to school. Betsy notices and asks why. Lexie tells her they’re picking up Cerise. The rest of the walk to school is tense, with Betsy trying to undermining Cerise in front of Lexie.
During Lexie’s seventh hour study hall, she gets a call from her father, who again is asking for a ride home. Lexie tries to explain she’s in school but when he says he’ll just drive home, Lexie decides she has to skip her last class of the day, even though she had promised to meet up with Betsy after school.
Lexie gets her father home and in bed safely. She messages Betsy to apologize but no answer. Then she messages Alexis. “I don’t know why you bothered.” “What do you mean?” Alexis then reveals that Dylan, their father, is dead by 2040, but she won’t tell Lexie when or how he dies.
Episode 8:
Alexis has dropped a bomb on Lexie: their dad is dead by 2040. Alexis won’t tell Lexie much about her father’s death, but she does mention that it will be soon. Of course Lexie wants to step in and stop it but Alexis thinks it’s a bad idea; who knows what else could change if they interfere with the past?
Lexie remembers Alexis’s comment about a snowstorm and when the weather forecast predicts heavy snowfall, Lexie is determined to keep an eye on her dad. She tries to talk him out of going out but fails, so she decides to follow him.
Inexperienced in driving, let alone driving in the snow, Lexie nearly has an accident. Dylan sees her nearly t-boned and he realizes how much he’s been placing his daughter in danger just to compensate for his drinking. He takes Lexie home and promises to start going to AA.
After Lexie fills in Alexis, Alexis gets a phone call; it’s her dad. What else has Lexie changed?
Episode 9:
Lexie forces her two friends to make a truce so she can finally share her big secret: her emails from her future self. Lexie knows Alexis is hiding more than she is saying and with her two friends’ help, she eventually discovers Alexis’s secret: that she is actually an undercover operative.
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Megan’s Episode List Rough Draft
What I learned doing this assignment is… that coming up with the specific details for episodes for each season requires even more time and creativity than the broad strokes. Still very, very rough at this stage!
SEASON 1: WORLDS APART
Episode 1: Lexie receives an email back from her future self.
Episode 2: Betsy hates high school; run-ins with a cheerleader named Margo. Meet Miss Perfect Lily, Lexie’s older sister
Episode 3: Cerise had told Lexie and Betsy that her mother was traveling on business but we find out she’s actually dead.
Episode 4: Scott seems to be Mr. Popularity but he’s failing almost all of his classes
Episode 5: Betsy gets discovered by the varsity coach and suddenly loves high school.
Episode 6: Lily seems to be the perfect daughter; until she refuses to pick up their alcoholic father from the bar; Lexie jumps in to his rescue without a driver’s license. From this point on, he always calls Lexie for help.
Episode 7: Alexis reveals that Dylan, their father, is dead by 2040, but she won’t tell Lexie when or how he dies.
Episode 8: Lexie keeps her father from driving on the night of his fatal accident
Episode 9: Lexie finds out that Alexis is actually an undercover operative.
SEASON 2: BEST OF BOTH WORLDS
Episode 1: Alexis receives a new assignment and asks for Lexie’s help. Meet Brett and Sterling.
Episode 2: Lexie asks out Tony, the guy she shyly turned down in season 1; they start dating
Episode 3: Hot lead in case; Alexis meets Hunter; sparks fly
Episode 4: Betsy asks Cerise, her competition for Lexie’s friendship, for help with grades.
Episode 5: Starling shows up Alexis at work.Brett finds out about Hunter; jealousy
Episode 6: Lexie finds out about Cerise helping Betsy cheat. Has to choose whether to tell.
Episode 7: Lexie realizes the criminal she is investigating is Tony’s father Salvatore.
Episode 8: Cerise, tired of being controlled by her father’s ridiculous number of rules, makes plans to run away.
Episode 9: Lexie finds out that her new boyfriend Tony is the one who grows up to become the head of the crime syndicate.
SEASON 3: A WORLD OF HURT
Episode 1: Young Tony Moretti shows Lexie a magic trick / Adult Tony Moretti escapes from Alexis’s custody.
Episode 2: Lexie caught snooping in Salvatore’s office; Salvatore promotes Lexie from hostess to office manager.
Episode 3: Sterling discovers Lexie’s emails.
Episode 4: Lexie tries to make Tony see the dark side of his father’s business.
Episode 5: Betsy gets caught cheating; kicked off the team; conflict with Margo returns
Episode 6: We discover Salvatore was aware the entire time of Lexie’s snooping; prompted to keep an eye on her
Episode 7: Sterling’s successful older brothers and impossible-to-please father; Sterling discovers that Brett is also spying on Alexis
Episode 8: Cerise decides to run away; Alexis learns that Brett is a double agent working for the Morettis.
Episode 9: Alexis accidentally kills Tony Moretti; doesn’t admit to Lexie it was her fault (Lexie is at a school dance slow dancing with Tony when she gets Alexis‘s text about Tony’s death); Alexis discovers the crime syndicate aren’t criminals at all: they were trying to take down a corrupt new government known as the Six.
SEASON 4: WORLDS COLLIDE
Episode 1: Lexie begins uncovering the identities of the Six before they rise to power.
Episode 2: Sterling becomes Alexis’s new partner
Episode 3: Popular painting style discovered; Lexie recognizes it as Cerise’s style; she is able to track down her runaway friend
Episode 4: Alexis finally takes a chance on dating: she asks out Hunter Ridgely
Episode 5: Marcus, Betsy’s younger brother, is run over by a drunk driver
Episode 6: The drunk driver is Dylan Abbott, Who would have been dead if Lexie hadn’t saved him in season 1; Betsy ends her friendship with Lexie
Episode 7: Cerise is reconciled with her father.
Episode 8: Alexis discovers the Six have not only developed communication with the past; they’ve also developed time travel
Episode 9: Lexie and Alexis meet for the first time in person in Lexie’s timeline. Alexis confesses to having killed Tony in her timeline and a furious Lexie returns to the future to undo adult Tony’s death.
SEASON 5: IT’S NOT THE END OF THE WORLD
Episode 1: Lexie tracks down Lily and Scott in the year 2040
Episode 2: Betsy and Margo are now friends.
Episode 3: Lexie tracks down Betsy in the year 2040.
Episode 4: Alexis locates her boss in Lexie’s timeline; fills him in and gets positioned as part of president’s security detail
Episode 5: Cerise’s art teacher’s college recommendation, which leads to a full ride scholarship which she hides from her father
Episode 6: Lexie tracks down Cerise in the year 2040; discovers how that friendship ended; Lexie meets Hunter (where?) and notices a strange spark despite the age difference
Episode 7: Lexie meets Sterling, who helps Lexie track down adult Tony Moretti
Episode 8: Alexis uncovers informs about the upcoming assassination
Episode 9: In an effort to stop her future self from killing adult Tony Moretti, Lexie shoots Alexis first, moments before Alexis in the past saves the president from assassination.
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Megan’s Five Seasons
What I learned doing this assignment is… that a good bit of discovery occurs just in the process of broad strokes outlining of five seasons. Using broad strokes forced me to focus on just my two main characters’ stories rather than getting bogged down in connected characters’ subplots. Really enjoyed the challenge of filling in the holes with this outlining process but thankful my creative subconscious can take a little break!
TITLE: DEAR FUTURE SELF
By: Megan Schemenauer
SEASON 1: WORLDS APART
An uninspired freshman English assignment takes on a surprising twist after Lexie Abbott sends an email to her future self and receives an answer! Alexis, a 33-year-old professional living in Chicago in the year 2040, seems to have life all figured out. Cool, confident, successful, Alexis is everything Lexie someday hopes to be.
With a genius older sister and a social superstar younger brother, Lexie often feels squeezed out of her own family. At school, she is almost nonexistent, a mere spectator in her friends’ high school drama. Alexis agrees to help Lexie become a more confident person, but is she entirely trustworthy? Does Alexis have Lexie’s best interests at heart or her own? She seems to know more than she is telling, including when and how Lexie’s father Dylan dies.
What is she hiding? By the end of the season, Lexie finds out: Alexis is not a retail manager at a Fox department store but actually an undercover operative!
SEASON 2: BEST OF BOTH WORLDS
It’s a discovery beyond Lexie’s wildest dreams: her future self is an undercover agent! And she needs Lexie’s help! Lexie and Alexis work together to uncover evidence in Lexie’s timeline to implicate a crime syndicate in Alexis’s timeline, posing danger for the duo in both worlds.
Lexie finds herself living in two worlds of her own: high school student by day, undercover operative in training by night. Her confidence level soars as a result of finding something she is truly made for. But will Lexie’s inexperience lead her to getting caught? Is Alexis endangering Lexie just to get ahead at work?
The line between Lexie’s worlds continues to blur. Just after Alexis brings the head of the crime syndicate into custody, Lexie learns that her coworker and new boyfriend Tony Moretti is the person who grows up to become the head of the crime syndicate that Alexis has just apprehended.
SEASON 3: A WORLD OF HURT
Can the future be reversed? For the first time, Lexie and Alexis find themselves with opposing agendas: Lexie tries to save her boyfriend Tony from a life of crime while Alexis seeks to recapture adult Tony, the head of the crime syndicate, after his escape from custody.
As a fledgling undercover operative, Lexie is now on her own. Can she keep Tony from turning to crime in the first place? Will Alexis recapture adult Tony Moretti now that she remembers who he is? Will Lexie aid Alexis in capturing their former boyfriend?
To Lexie’s horror, Tony Moretti is killed in Alexis’s timeline. But Alexis also discovers that the crime syndicate she and Lexie have been fighting are actually the good guys, fighting against the corrupt new oligarchy known simply as the Six.
How did this group come to overthrow the United States’ government? How had the Morettis been planning to take them down? Is there anything Alexis and Lexie can do to make up for an epic mistake?
SEASON 4: WORLDS COLLIDE
Lexie receives a crash course in future US History as she learns from Alexis about the major changes that will be taking place in her country in just a few short years. The Moretti syndicate has fallen apart after the death of Tony Moretti. It is up to Alexis and Lexie to continue what they started to displace the Six and restore the former democratic republic.
As they begin to investigate, they learn that the Six have been aware of their communication the entire time. But why is this new government so interested in monitoring conversations with the past? Alexis soon discovers that the experiments go beyond communicating with the past; the new government has also developed the technology for time travel.
Alexis and Lexie meet face-to-face for the first time when Alexis travels to Lexie’s timeline, where she finally drums up the courage to confess to accidentally killing Tony Moretti in her timeline. Enraged, Lexie decides to travel to the future against Alexis’s advice to try to prevent Tony’s death. Alexis remains in the past to stop the upcoming presidential assassination that leads to the uprising of the Six. Once again, Lexie finds herself alone and at odds with her future self.
SEASON 5: IT’S NOT THE END OF THE WORLD
What do you do when you’re so angry you want to kill your future self but can’t . . . because it’s you? While Alexis stays in Lexie’s timeline to prevent the assassination that allows the Six to come to power, a furious Lexie goes forward in time to prevent her future self from killing Tony Moretti. It’s a race against time.
Despite Alexis’s tutorials, the year 2040 is far beyond anything Lexie could have imagined. Here, Lexie finds the answers to many of the questions she had been seeking: Where did Betsy disappear to? What ended her friendship with Cerise? But ultimately, the only question that matters is, can she stop her future self from killing Tony?
Lexie does succeed in saving Tony, but in doing so accidentally kills her future self. As a result, Alexis disappears just as she is about to save the President from assassination back in Lexie’s timeline. The President and future Alexis die at the same moment, Alexis in Lexie’s arms. “I’d rather know the circumstances of my own death than bear the guilt of someone else’s.”
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Megan’s Character Descriptions
What I learned doing this assignment is… to focus on the most interesting details about each of my six main characters. For some characters, I needed to dig a little deeper into their layers to discover what makes them tick. I found myself asking the question “why?” over and over again. I intentionally brainstormed opposing characteristics that I could potentially work into certain characters to make them more complex.
Lexie Abbott
A naive, socially awkward 15-year old who catches spelling and grammatical errors for fun, Lexie is growing tired of her boring, bookish life where she always feels overshadowed by a genius older sister and a social superstar younger brother.
As part of a freshman English assignment, she sends an email to her future self and shockingly receives a response. Her future self is much cooler, more confident, and successful than could have ever imagined. Lexie’s goal is now to become just like Alexis.
But what if Alexis isn’t sharing the entire truth with her younger self? What unexpected intrigue could Lexie be getting herself into as she tries to become more like someone she barely knows—her future self.
Alexis Abbott
Cool, confident, successful, and living in Chicago in the year 2040, Alexis is everything Lexie someday hopes to be. But even though she presents an independent facade, she is actually miserably alone. Despite the fact that her coworker Brett hits on her hard, Alexis remains a complete ice queen, keeping him as well as the rest of the world at arms’ length.
Lexie’s email arrives at Alexis’s darkest moment and in a way saves her by providing Alexis with a project—to transform her pathetic younger self into someone no one will ever take advantage of. She says she’s trying to help Lexie but what she’s really interested in is improving her own life. Alexis gives Lexie information about her future, but there are some things she refuses to elaborate on. What is she hiding?
Betsy Sullivan
Tactlessly honest but fiercely protective, Betsy is used to life not going her way. Her father ran out on their family when she was younger and she’s basically been a second mother to her younger brother ever since.
With the arrival of high school, Betsy notices alarming changes: a growing distance between herself and her childhood best friend Lexie, academic struggles, and interpersonal conflict with the head cheerleader who seems to have a personal vendetta against her. Tall and athletic, Betsy gets recruited for the varsity girls’ basketball team as a freshman, but the honor means little if she can’t keep her grades up. When newcomer Cerise arrives, it seems like Betsy might be losing her sport and her best friend.
Cerise Davies
A newcomer to town, talented artist Cerise just wants a fresh start where no one knows her—or the fact that her mother has just died of cancer. Since her mother’s death, her father has become unbearably overprotective and Cerise has no choice but to lie to him to maintain some sense of freedom.
As an angry, grieving freshman in a new town, Cerise had no aspirations for new friends, but she soon finds herself gravitating toward Lexie despite the fact that Betsy, Lexie’s longtime best friend, clearly does not want to share her best friend with anyone. She is therefore completely surprised when Betsy comes to her with a request. Despite their conflict, Cerise agrees to help Betsy cheat in order to maintain academic eligibility for the basketball team.
Brett Hall
Alexis’s coworker Brett, a carefree Romeo, is used to rejection. He’s been hitting on Alexis regularly for the last 18 months with no success despite a sensational smile and a series of quips.
But this unrequited lover has a secret: retail is not his only job. His unknown employer has assigned him to spy on Alexis. As a result, Brett knows about her communication with her past self. But how will he use that information?
Sterling Zheng
Alexis’s work competition, the thorn in Alexis’s side, who undermines coworkers to get ahead and is hated by everyone. But with a demanding father and three extremely successful older brothers she feels driven to match their achievement. Though a cut-throat backstabber at work, Sterling volunteers at the local animal shelter and excels in languages.
Since Alexis is her biggest competition for success at work, Sterling spies on Alexis in order to get ahead, which is how she uncovers Brett’s questionable activities. How will she use the information?
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by Megan Schemenauer.
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by Megan Schemenauer.
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by Megan Schemenauer.
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Megan’s Intriguing Concept and World
What I learned doing this assignment is…that the hook is presented in the concept as basically one extended sentence and should be the most unique or unusual part of my idea. I also learned that any world can become more intriguing through brainstorming. By brainstorming the intriguing world, I uncovered an interesting new plot twist I wouldn’t have discovered previously.
The challenge will be to still channel the right genre (action comedy) through the layers of intrigue to avoid losing my comedic voice.
Concept:
A. Lexie, a smart but overlooked middle child . . .
B. …is on the verge of running away from home when she discovers she can communicate with her future self . . .
C. …whom she begins seeking advice from to become more adventurous. . .
D. …transforming even earlier than expected into the badass undercover agent that is coaching her.
Intriguing World:
Unique Sub-World: Undercover operatives in 2040
Previously unexplored: Personal lives of undercover agents; the US government as an oligarchy
The unknown: Intricacies of personal relationships for agents, what the year 2040 will be like
The unseen: What would the US be like with a complete change in government? Private subgroups experimenting with parallel timelines to change history
Unheard of Dangers: the technology for these revolutions is already in place through the media, Google, the Internet, and social media
Reason to explore it: questions about security in technology; questions about corruption in the government and the voting process; questions about the future
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Megan Is Ready for Feedback!
What I learned doing this assignment is… that a LOT of planning and analysis goes into a television show long before the first draft of the pilot gets written! I found myself analyzing each of my main characters in greater detail, using what I already know to figure out what I don’t. Looking forward to getting an outsider’s perspective.
Please message me if interested in trading frameworks for feedback.
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Megan’s Creating Irony! – Parts 1-2
What I learned doing this assignment is…that irony adds valuable depth to a script. It’s the sticking power that intrigues an audience at a deeper level. I also noticed in analyzing my model show that irony is subtle. Finally, I realized that the irony for my show was already in place from previous brainstorming sessions; I just had to identify it.
TITLE: Riverdale
Examples of Irony:
Veronica, the girl seeking to know the truth about the murderer, may be partially responsible for the murder via her family.
Mr. Blossom, the father of the dead Jason Blossom, is the one who killed his son.
The Blossoms, Riverdale’s most esteemed family, is responsible for not only the murder, but also incest and drug smuggling.
Mr. Jones, the seedy Serpent who confessed to the murder, is actually innocent.
In order to keep his son safe, Mr. Jones confesses to a murder he didn’t commit.
TITLE: Dear Future Self
Examples of Irony:
Lexie wants to stand out amongst her siblings, but in being an enabler to her father, she’s going along with whatever he wants.
Lexie wants to be bolder and more independent, but as she begins heeding Alexis’s advice, she becomes more dependent on Alexis.
Alexis wants to be able to kindle real relationships but as an undercover operative, her job is to create fake ones.
Brett is Alexis’s partner but he’s the one who betrays her and steals her login.
Stering is Alexis’s competition but she’s the one who saves Alexis with a tip from Lexie.
Betsy, the rough-and-tumble, tactless athlete, grows up to become a successful model.
Cerise wants more freedom but in lying to her father, he only clamps down on her harder.
Cerise wants to make friends, but in hiding the truth from them she inhibits her ability to form lasting bonds.
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Megan’s Plot and Character Layers – Part 2
What I learned doing this assignment is…thinking in layers is mentally exhausting. I’m starting to see, though, why drama naturally lends itself to binge worthy television. I still want to write comedy but if there isn’t some mystery or intrigue, there isn’t that same need to binge watch the series.
TITLE: Dear Future Self
PLOT LAYERS –
The story: A high school freshman makes contact with her future self.
The story beneath the story: Alexis is not a successful business professional living in Chicago but an unhappy undercover government operative with absolutely no one in her life.
Major scheme revealed: While Alexis presents herself as a mentor to Lexie, she is actually trying to use this unusual situation to her own benefit to improve her own miserable life
Mystery revealed: How is this communication possible? Government scientists. Alexis has no idea that the government set her up with this experiment and is watching her every move.
Thought the story was one thing, but it is another: Thought this is a story of a “big sis character” giving life advice to a “younger sister character” until the truth comes out about Alexis’s line of work; then the two characters have to reconcile to help one another
Major shift in Meaning: Lexie realizing what Alexis and her life really is (what she herself eventually will become)
Hidden history: Lexie’s alcoholic father; the accident that kills Betsy’s younger brother Marcus; Betsy’s abandonment once she goes into modeling; Cerise stealing Alexis’s fiancé; Alexis’s beginning as an undercover operative
Hidden plan: Brett is a double agent working for a crime syndicate; he has been assigned to keep an eye on Alexis and Lexie, who have been digging around into the past and could end up incriminating the syndicate; he does so by presenting himself as Alexis’s partner and showing romantic interest inher
Major betrayal: Alexis’s partner Brett steals her laptop and begins communicating with Lexie as if he were Alexis; he gets key information from Lexie, but also endangers her?
CHARACTER LAYERS – identity beneath the identity
Secret identity: Alexis is actually an undercover agent. Brett is not just Alexis’s undercover partner; he also works for a crime syndicate connected to the Morettis, the family Lexie works for. Maybe Stering was suspicious about Brett, which is why she puts herself up as Alexis’s competition in order to keep an eye on Brett and keep Alexis safe; her secret identity is that she is not the office bitch but Alexis’s avior
Character intrigue: Alexis wants to keep this relationship with Lexie a secret in order to use it to her advantage; she doesn’t realize that both the government and her partner Brett are already aware of the situation.
Hidden relationships and conspiracies: Bus boy and former biology partner Tony Moretti from Lexie’s job grows up to become a leader in the crime syndicate and Brett’s real employer
Hidden Character history: Alexis hates Cerise / Lexie doesn’t understand why; Alexis knows when and how their father dies / as her father’s enabler, Lexie wants to know so she can stop his death; Betsy and Lexie drift apart / Lexie thinks it’s due to basketball or her new friendship with Cerise but Alexis know it happens when Betsy’s younger brother Marcus is killed
Plot Surface: Lexie receives an email back from her future self. At first she thinks it’s a joke. Checks in with friends and siblings to see what they know about the email. She realizes it’s legit when Alexis tells her something Lexie never told anyone.
Layer 1: Mystery: They try to figure out how this communication is possible and how they can both use it to their benefit. Lexie starts to depend on Alexis for advice; Alexis takes on a big sister / mentor role
Layer 2: Hidden Agenda: A few situations come up between Lexie and Alexis that strike Lexie as strange: Alexis’s strong reaction to Cerise’s name, her mention of their father’s death but refusing to share details; Lexie is not as certain that she can trust Alexis.
Layer 3: Major Shift in Meaning: Lexie finds out that Alexis is an undercover operative (how?); she cuts off communicating with Alexis because she feels she cannot trust her.
Layer 4: Hidden Agenda: When Alexis reaches out in danger, Lexie tries to help her by providing her some key info from the past: some document from Moretti (it’s not the father’s they need; it’s the son, Tony’s)
Layer 5: Sabotage: Lexie finds out it was Brett she was sharing this info with, not Alexis; he had stolen Alexis’s phone/laptop/login?
Layer 6: Wound: Tony Moretti rejected by Lexie; Brett rejected by Alexis
Character Surface: Alexis is Lexie’s future self.
Layer 1: Secret Identity: Alexis presents herself as a successful (but boring) retail manager in Chicago when she is actually an undercover operative.
Layer 2: Wound: She became an agent, cutting off friends and family, after being betrayed by her best friend and her fiancé. (She doesn’t tell Lexie immediately which best friend, making Lexie suspicious of both Betsy and Cerise for a while.)
Layer 3: Hidden Agenda: The night she got Lexie’s email, she had been on the verge of committing suicide; after receiving the email, she realized she might have just gotten a second chance to fix her pat mistakes.
Layer 4: Hidden Character History: the end of her friendship with Betsy, the end of her friendship with Cerise, the death of her father.
Character Surface: Lexie is a naive 15-year-old who wants to be special and have a more exciting life.
Layer 1: Wound / Competition: She feels unnoticed by her parents compared to her academically successful older sister and socially successful younger brother.
Layer 2: Hidden Agenda: To get her parents (and the world’s) attention by becoming someone or something great
Layer 3: Character Intrigue: She finds out about Betsy cheating with Cerise’s help around the same time she realizes Alexis’s true occupation; feels totally betrayed and alone; temporarily cuts everyone off; becomes the very thing she feared—just like Alexis
Layer 4: Future Consequences: When Alexis says she’s in danger, Lexie agrees to get her important info: but she doesn’t realize that it is Brett, not Alexis, she is helping.
Character Surface: Brett is Alexis’s partner, a fellow operative who is also romantically interested.
Layer 1: Moral Issue: Brett hits on Alexis in an obvious way that is almost inappropriate in the workplace. He seems to like her and wants to date her but Alexis is cold as ice due to trust issues.
Layer 2: Competition: Brett sees Hunter Ridgely, the shooting range owner, as a romantic threat.
Layer 3: Secret Identity: Brett is a double agent working for a crime syndicate.
Layer 4: Character Intrigue: The crime syndicate Brett works for is the Morettis, Alexis’s former boss and coworker, whom she rejected when she was younger
Character Surface: Betsy is Lexie’s outspoken childhood best friend but by high school they are starting to grow apart
Layer 1: Competition: Betsy versus Margo: basketball versus cheerleading prank war for dominance as the premier girls sport at school
Layer 2: Competition: Competing with newcomer Cerise to maintain her position as Lexie’s bff
Layer 3: Moral Issue / Conspiracy: Needs Cerise’s help to cheat to maintain her grades to stay on the varsity basketball team
Layer 4: Wound: Her father ran off from the family; she’s become a second mom to her younger brother Marcus
Character Surface: Cerise is the newcomer to high school but is quickly becoming Lexie’s best friend because of the similarities they share.
Layer 1: Hidden Character History: Her mother died of cancer but she doesn’t tell anyone.
Layer 2: Conspiracy: Helping Betsy cheat to maintain her grades to keep playing varsity basketball
Layer 3: Hidden Character Relationship: Her overprotective father, whom she lies to often and lies about to her friends
Layer 4: Hidden Agenda: To become an artist and move out of her father’s house as soon as possible
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Megan’s Plot and Character Layers – Part 1
What I learned doing this assignment is… it takes many episodes (I think I’m on episode 10 of Riverdale) to start noticing all the layers that have unfolded, in both the plot and the characters. I think analyzing layers in another show will be much easier than layering the events and reveals in my own show!
TITLE: Riverdale
Plot Surface: The captain of the high school football team is mysteriously murdered.
Layer 1: Major Shift in Meaning: He was actually running away.
Layer 2: Conspiracy: His twin sister Cheryl was helping him.
Layer 3: Major Scheme Revealed: He was running away with Polly Cooper because he had gotten her pregnant.
Layer 4: Moral Issue: He was potentially involved in dealing drugs.
Layer 5: Mystery: His letterman jacket and a gun were found in FP’s trailer; FP is a Serpent and Jughead’s dad.
Character Surface: Betty, the normal, all-American good girl next door
Layer 1: Hidden Agenda: She’s been in love with Archie since childhood but he doesn’t return those feelings.
Layer 2: Major Betrayal: Her sister Polly was put in a mental institution by her parents.
Layer 3: Secret Identity: Betty at times demonstrates a darkness that makes you wonder about her sanity.
Layer 4: Conspiracy: Betty works with her sister Polly to first, get out of the mental institution and second, to keep the baby.
Character Surface: Archie, the new quarterback of the football team
Layer 1: Secret Identity: He’s chasing a dream to be a musician.
Layer 2: Moral Issue: He’s been hooking up with his school music teacher.
Layer 3: Conspiracy: He was by the river with the music teacher when they heard a gunshot.
Layer 4: Major Scheme Revealed: He wants to go to the principal to come clean, even if it gets them both in trouble.
Character Surface: Jughead, the sensitive, intelligent poor boy from the wrong side of town
Layer 1: Secret Identity: He presents himself as an intentional outsider observing and writing about the world around him.
Layer 2: Wound: His family has fallen apart due to his dad‘s alcoholism.
Layer 3: Hidden Character History: We find out when the drive-in is shut down that Jughead has been living at the drive-in.
Layer 4: Hidden Agenda: He starts to show interest in dating Betty.
Character Surface: Veronica, the spoiled rich newcomer
Layer 1: Competition: She at first comes across as competition with Betty for Archie.
Layer 2: Wound: Her father is in prison for embezzling; her family lost everything in their old life and she and her mother had to start all over in Riverdale.
Layer 3: Major Betrayal: Her mother forges her signature in order to get a contract for her new beau Fred Andrews. It is also a betrayal because her mother is still married to her father but dating Fred.
Layer 4: Conspiracy: She works with Betty’s mother to investigate FP’s trailer for any sign of his involvement in Jason Blossom’s death without Betty’s approval.
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Megan’s Big Picture Open Loops – Part 2
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I still feel like I’m circling the same basic dozen or so plot points. I’m not sure yet how to get these ideas to spawn new ones; usually this type of creation happens when I’m actually writing. Trying to generate plot ideas in the brainstorming step of the process is proving challenging. I just tried to keep asking questions that I’VE been wondering about my main characters.
TITLE: Dear Future Self
GOALS:
Will Lexie’s life improve now that she’s connected with Alexis?
Will Lexie’s parents ever value her as much as her siblings?
Will Lexie stop acting as an enabler to her father?
Will Alexis’s life improve now that she’s connected with Lexie?
Will Betsy be able to handle the varsity basketball team as a freshman?
Will Cerise ever stand up to her dad?
CONSEQUENCES:
Will someone find out about Lexie and Alexis’s communication through parallel timelines?
Will Alexis ruin Lexie’s life by pursuing a better life for herself?
What is Lexie willing to give up for Alexis? What is she willing to give up in order to be “special”?
Will Lexie trust Alexis’s advice implicitly, even when it sounds completely wrong?
SOLVING PROBLEMS:
Will Lexie ever become more adventurous?
Will Alexis learn how to reconnect with and trust people?
How is their communication possible?
Is the government involved?
Will Betsy get kicked off the basketball team?
RELATIONSHIPS:
Will Lexie and Betsy’s friendship survive high school?
Will Alexis ever open up to the idea of a relationship again?
Will Betsy and Cerise ever become friends?
Will Sterling dethrone Alexis as the best agent?
Will Alexis and Brett ever get together?
Will Alexis ever move forward in her relationship with Hunter?
DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
Is someone monitoring their communication, keeping them from using key info to their advantage?
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Megan’s Big Picture Open Loops – Part 1
What I learned doing this assignment is…that questions are powerful. You want to keep the audience wondering all the way to the finale . . . and possibly beyond.
TITLE: Riverdale
GOALS:
Will Betty ever get together with Archie?
Does Archie have what it takes to become a musician?
Will Betty ever get her sister Polly back?
Will Cheryl find Jason’s killer?
Can Betty prove Polly‘s innocence?
CONSEQUENCES:
Will Betty and Jughead get caught in their often illegal investigations?
Will Veronica be able to start living beyond the shadow of her dad’s shady business dealings that landed him in prison?
What will happen to Polly and Jason Blossom’s baby?
Will Jughead have to continue living on his own because of his father’s past mistakes?
SOLVING PROBLEMS:
Who killed Jason Blossom?
What role does Polly have in Jason’s murder?
Why is everyone so afraid of the Blossoms?
How will the Blossoms treat Polly? Is she safe with them?
RELATIONSHIPS:
Will Jughead and Betty’s relationship last?
Will Archie be interested now that she’s with Jughead?
What will happen between Fred Andrews and Hermione Lodge?
What is Hermione Lodge’s history with Jughead’s dad?
Will Polly’s father and mother get divorced?
Will Kevin find out he’s being used?
DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
Will Fred Andrews’s business survive?
Will his workers be attacked again?
How are the Serpents involved in Jason‘s death?
Will Jason’s murderer kill again?
Was Jason involved in drug dealing?
Can Jughead’s dad sober up and get his family back?
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Megan’s Show Mysteries – Part 2
What I learned doing this assignment is… that lightbulb moments are the best! I realized that before this assignment, I had only considered the opening shocking event, not the overtime mystery. The storyline seems to have a lot more direction now after forcing myself to think through the ramifications of the opening mystery and discovery. Layering the reveals will probably be one of the more challenging aspects to writing a binge worthy TV show, but I’m excited to get started!
TITLE: Dear Future Self
Shocking Event Mystery:
A. Shocking Event: Lexie discovers an English assignment in which she emails her future self actually makes contact with her future self
B. Secret: Lexie decides to keep this discovery a secret so no one thinks she’s crazy
C. Investigation: Lexie and Alexis investigate and experiment with the veracity and the extent of their unexpected connection
Veracity: Lexie asks her questions no one else would know.
Veracity: Lexie buys something significant but won’t tell Alexis what it is; it shows up in Alexis’s room
Extent: Alexis tells Lexie to start putting half her weekly allowance into a savings account
Extent: Lexie asks Alexis questions about each of her friends and family to find out what happens to them
Extent: Alexis slips and mentions her father’s death but refuses to tell Lexie when or how; Lexie becomes obsessed with finding out
WWWWW and How:
Who: Lexie and Alexis
What: Communicate through email between 15-year-old and 33-year-old self
Where: small midwestern town
When: September 2022 / September 2040
Part Withheld:
Why: Why do they continue to communicate?
How: How is this communication possible?
Over Time Mystery: How is this communication possible and why do they continue to make contact?
A. Cover up: Alexis is an undercover operative, not an administrative assistant
B. Secret: Neither Lexie nor Alexis tell anyone about the connection for fear they will lose it (or come across crazy); Alexis had been contemplating suicide the night she got Lexie’s first email; maybe Lexie had been contemplating running away
C. Reveals: When Alexis’s true profession is revealed, will Lexie still trust her? What if Alexis finds out the government has her personal computer bugged and is aware of her contact with the past? What if Lexie gets roped into becoming an undercover operative in the past (stopping cold cases)? How much would Lexie have to change to grow into this new role but at the same time turning into the person she’s afraid she’ll become?
WWWWW and How:
Who: Lexie and Alexis
What: communicating across timelines
Where: small midwestern town and Chicago
When: September 2022 / September 2040
Part Withheld:
Why: Why has the government allowed this contact with the past?
How: How is it possible? How will the government use it to their advantage?
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Megan’s Show Mysteries – Part 1
What I learned doing this assignment is…that while it’s important to hook your audience right away, it’s even more important to keep them hooked through reveals and mystery.
TITLE: Riverdale
Shocking Event Mystery:
A. Shocking Event: Jason Blossom’s disappearance
B. Secret: Jason was actually running away from his controlling family and Riverdale
C. Investigation: Cheryl, the Blossoms, Betty and Jughead, and the police are all trying to figure out what happened to Jason Blossom
WWWWW and How:
Who: Jason Blossom
What: Disappeared
Where: from Riverdale
When: mid-July
How: His sister helped him row across a river
Part Withheld:
Why: Why did he disappear?
Over Time Mystery: Jason Blossom’s murder
A. Cover up: Polly sent to an insane asylum to cover up the pregnancy; the police chief’s suspect map gets stolen
B. Secret: Jason had gotten Polly pregnant and they were planning on running away to raise the baby
C. Reveals: Jason’s letterman jacket in Jughead’s dad’s trailer
WWWWW and How:
What: Jason’s murder
Where: his body washed up along the river
When: mid-July
How: Gunshot to the head
Part Withheld:
Who: Who killed Jason?
Why: Why was he murdered?
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Megan’s Show Empathy/Distress – Part 2
What I learned doing this assignment is… I need more ideas. I seem to be circling the same dozen ideas with each of these assignments, but I’m not sure where to go other than here. I’m also struggling to stay in the vein of comedy when the show I’m analyzing is clearly teen drama.
TITLE: Dear Future Self
A. Undeserved misfortune:
Lexie: alcoholic father
Betsy: her father abandoned her family
Cerise: mother died of cancer
Alexis: her best friend stole her fiance
B. External Character conflicts:
Lexie: conflict with her siblings to be viewed as successful by their parents
Betsy / Cerise: competition over friendship with Lexie
Lexie / Betsy: conflict over Betsy’s cheating to stay in athletics and their diverging priorities
Alexis / Sterling: work conflict
Alexis / Brett: romance conflict
C. Plot intruding on life:
Alexis: begins changing at work the more she gets to know Lexie; she second guesses ruthless decisions she never would have flinched at in the past
Lexie: becomes more courageous; she begins engaging in riskier behavior with a sort of superhero syndrome since discovering Alexis
Betsy: failing math; threatened to be kicked off the basketball team
Cerise: finally has a way to connect with Betsy: by helping her pass math, even if it means cheating
Lexie and Betsy’s friendship falling away / Lexie and Cerise’s friendship blossoming
D. Moral dilemmas:
Betsy: cheating on academics to stay in athletics; Cerise is helping; Lexie knows but is friends with both girls and doesn’t want either to get into trouble
Lexie: supporting her father despite his alcoholism and occasionally embarrassing antics
Alexis: wanting to use her new connection with Lexie to her advantage
E. Forced decisions they’d never make:
Lexie: considers leaving home
Betsy: owning up to her cheating and getting kicked off the basketball team?
Cerise: standing up to her overprotective father
Alexis: agreeing to a date with Hunter . . . in front of Brett, whom she constantly rejected saying she had sworn off dating
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Megan’s Show Empathy/Distress – Part 1
What I learned doing this assignment is… that every episode has moments of empathy and distress. (I even noticed it on episodes of the reality TV show Survivor.) However, finding big picture empathy and distress requires multiple episodes to pick up on. I still don’t know whether the instances I’ve picked up on in Riverdale are episode empathy / distress or big picture.
TITLE: Riverdale
A. Undeserved misfortune:
Betty: her sister Polly unfairly put into an insane asylum to hide her illegitimate pregnancy
Veronica: people judging her based on her imprisoned father; her mother forging her signature and making her feel like she has nothing
Jughead: his father’s role in the Serpents and alcoholism cause him to leave home and live at the drive-in; accused of killing Jason Blossom because of his seedy background
B. External Character conflicts:
Veronica / Archie: her mother is dating Archie’s father even though her dad is in prison
Veronica / Hermione: her mother forged Veronica’s name and now Veronica wants pay back
Veronica / Betty: occasional friendship struggles
Archie: his dad not as supportive with music as he was with football
Betty: her parents are forcing Polly to put the baby up for adoption against her wishes
C. Plot intruding on life:
Cheryl: her twin brother’s murder
Betty: finding out her sister was pregnant and that her parents intentionally sent Polly away; knows where Polly is hiding
Jughead: the drive in is sold, forcing him to live in the school locker room; brought down to police station under suspicion of the murder of Jason Blossom
D. Moral dilemmas:
Archie: Having to decide whether or not to keep the gunshot a secret when revealing it would also give away his secret romance with a teacher
Betty: telling Polly that Jason Blossom had been murdered, even though she knew it would hurt her sister; hiding Polly’s location from her parents
Jughead: trying to stand behind an alcoholic screwup father who constantly fails him
E. Forced decisions they’d never make:
Archie: Lying to his dad to pursue a music career; lying to his friend Jughead to pursue Mrs. Grundy
Betty: forced to stand beside her parents unwillingly against the Blossoms; working with Cheryl and the Blossoms to keep Polly’s baby (and Jason’s baby) safe
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Megan’s Show Relationship Map – Day 2
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I definitely struggle the most to identify subtext. For me, it’s hard to imagine what problems these characters might have before they’ve truly begun to interact with one another. Feels more like a brainstorming session than anything. Not sure whether I’ve really generated anything useful yet though.
TITLE: Dear Future Self
LEXIE AND BETSY
Surface: Childhood best friends despite being “opposites”
Common Ground: Friends
Conflict: Growing apart due to their differences: Betsy getting more into sports, Lexie into academics
History: Childhood best friends; Betsy was often Lexie’s defender
Subtext: Tension: Lexie is realizing it may be time to move on from this childhood friendship
Relationship Arc: From best friends to acquaintances
LEXIE AND CERISE
Surface: New friends but growing close fast
Common Ground: Friends, both quieter; both struggle with their father’s issues (Lexie: alcoholism; Cerise: overprotective)
Conflict: Lexie doesn’t think it’s fair for Cerise to be bullied into helping Betsy cheat to stay on the basketball team
History: Newly developing friendship; Cerise has just moved to town
Subtext: Awkwardness at Cerise’s displacement of her former best friend but thrilled to find someone who “gets her” so well
Relationship Arc: From strangers to friends to best friends
LEXIE AND ALEXIS
Surface: An older, wiser version of Lexie; a better “big sister” than her own sister; a mentor
Common Ground: They are the same person and understand how one another thinks and feels better than anyone else in the world
Conflict: Personality conflict: Lexie is still naively innocent and therefore supremely annoying to Alexis; Alexis is too cold and callous for Lexie.
History: The two connect through an email sent to Lexie’s future self (parallel universe)
Subtext: Alexis’s disgust for Lexie; Lexie’s fear of becoming Alexis
Relationship Arc: From nonexistent to dependent on one another to make important life decisions (one’s choices massively affects the other’s life)
ALEXIS AND BRETT
Surface: Partners
Common Ground: Hardworking, fiercely dedicated agents who share a sense of humor
Conflict: Brett has developed feelings for Alexis that she does not return
History: They’ve been working together as part of an undercover team for the last 18 months
Subtext: Romantic / Sexual tension?
Relationship Arc: From partner and would-be romantic interest to betrayer?
ALEXIS AND STERLING
Surface: Coworkers
Common Ground: Both fiercely dedicated agents; both prioritize work over life; both are single women with no children
Conflict: Sterling constantly jockeys with Alexis for positioning in the department
History: Started as partners; unable to work together; now coworkers and competitors . . . in every way.
Subtext: Competition
Relationship Arc: From competitor to savior?
ALEXIS AND HUNTER RIDGELY
Surface: Owner of a local shooting range
Common Ground: Both gun enthusiasts; similar political inclinations
Conflict: She finds him attractive but has sworn off dating; he finds her intriguing and wants to figure out why; she gets nervous the more he tries to get to know her, afraid he will discover her secrets
History: Alexis met him three months ago when she discovered the shooting range
Subtext: Interest / Disinterest
Relationship Arc: From strangers to friends
BETSY AND COACH SIMPSON
Surface: He is the varsity basketball coach. She’s a freshman but he wants her to play varsity.
Common Ground: Both eat, sleep, and breathe basketball
Conflict: He sometimes pushes Betsy beyond her breaking point, causing her grades to suffer
History: Coach saw Betsy playing on the freshman girl’s team and talked her coach into moving Betsy up to his varsity team.
Subtext: She reminds Coach of his dead daughter. He pushes Betsy the way he used to push his daughter Claire before she died in a drunk driving accident four years ago.
Relationship Arc: From strangers to coach/player to the father figure Betsy no longer has (deadbeat dad); she wants nothing more than to please him
BETSY AND MARGO
Surface: Snotty cheer captain who makes Betsy’s life hell
Common Ground: Both attend the same school; both are extremely involved in athletics (Betsy in basketball, Margo in cheer)
Conflict: Prank war initiated by Margo and the cheerleaders
History: Margo and Betsy met on the first day of freshman year; Betsy insulted Margo and Margo’s had it out for Betsy ever since
Subtext: Jealousy; both girls wish they could be more like the other (Margo is pretty and popular; Betsy has real friends and a close-knit family)
Relationship Arc: From strangers to enemies to frenemies
BETSY AND MARCUS
Surface: Betsy’s 7-year-old brother
Common Ground: Same family; both experienced their father running off; both enjoy sports
Conflict: Betsy can sometimes be stifling and overprotective to Marcus, like a second mother
History: Siblings; Dad ran off with a waitress right after Marcus was born; Betsy is very attached to Marcus and protective of him
Subtext: Hurt: both try to act like everything is normal but neither has really dealt with their father’s abandonment
Relationship Arc: From siblings to support system
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Megan’s Show Relationship Map – Day 1
What I learned doing this assignment is… that it’s not just the main characters who have detailed relationship maps. I’ve noticed many of the supporting characters also developing in their relationships with the main characters: Josie and the Pussycat Dolls with both Archie and Veronica, Hermione Lodge with her daughter, Betty with her parents, Betty with Polly.
TITLE: Riverdale
BETTY AND ARCHIE
Surface: Archies best friend
Common Ground: High school students who want the best for Riverdale and their friends
Conflict: Betty wants a relationship with him; he doesn’t
History: Best friends and neighbors since childhood; at one point as children he promised to marry her
Subtext: Unrequited love
Relationship Arc: From best friends to . . .?
BETTY AND VERONICA
Surface: A budding friendship
Common Ground: Female high school students
Conflict: They both like Archie more than a friend..
History: They seem to have just developed a new friendship when Veronica moved to town
Subtext: Competition
Relationship Arc: From strangers and competition to friends
BETTY AND JUGHEAD
Surface: A fellow writer and investigator
Common Ground: High school students who like to write
Conflict: The struggle to maintain a friendship when Jughead likes her and she likes Archie (love triangle)
History: Childhood friends; she seems more open and real with Jughead than with anyone else
Subtext: Tension (romantic for him, disinterest for her)
Relationship Arc: From friends to potential lovers?
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Megan’s Character Emotions – Part 2
What I learned doing this assignment is…these characters have already started to come to life in my mind. When I try to experiment and plug in a trait that doesn’t seem to fit their personality, it doesn’t stick. It’s jarring. It’s equivalent to dressing someone out of their comfort style. While I’m glad my characters seem so self-aware, I hope this eccentricity doesn’t stifle my creativity in the weeks to come.
TITLE: My Future Self
CHARACTER: Lexie
A. Situational: Hope / Fear: hopes to find a successful life of her own / fears being insignificant, a nobody
B. Motivation: Want / Need: wants a more exciting life / needs to love and accept herself
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask: base negative emotion: selfishness / public mask: good, hard-working student; obedient, helpful daughter
D. Weaknesses: easily peer pressured or flattered, naïve
E. Triggers: failure, conflict
F. Coping Mechanism: over performance, withdrawal, flight
CHARACTER: Betsy
A. Situational: Hope / Fear: hopes for a secure family and friends group / fears people leaving or betraying her
B. Motivation: Want / Need: wants security / needs confidence
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask: doubt and mistrust / public mask: blasé
D. Weaknesses: speaking without thinking
E. Triggers: fear of loss, competition
F. Coping Mechanism: aggression, fighting, alters state
CHARACTER: Cerise
A. Situational: Hope / Fear: hopes to inspire the world and heal herself and others through her art / fears confrontation
B. Motivation: Want / Need: wants greater freedom / needs to learn to speak up for herself
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask: base negative emotion: anger / introverted artist
D. Weaknesses: vengeful, unforgiving
E. Triggers: inequity
F. Coping Mechanism: avoidance, withdrawal
CHARACTER: Alexis
A. Situational: Hope / Fear: hopes for a more fulfilling life / fears dying alone
B. Motivation: Want / Need: wants to excel / needs to prioritize people
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask: base negative emotion: selfishness / public mask: self-sacrifice and duty to country
D. Weaknesses: denial, lying
E. Triggers: failure; animals, babies, families
F. Coping Mechanism: withdrawal, working out, shooting range
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Megan’s Character Emotions – Part 1
What I learned doing this assignment is…analyzing characters at this level of depth is challenging, but I enjoy when a moment or line of dialogue in the show proves my analysis on point. I’ve also learned you can’t necessarily answer all the questions from a single episode.
I’m also starting to notice that reveals are staggered and layered as a season progresses. I just wonder if I’ll be able to lay out a season plotline with this much detail and intrigue (yes, the show is growing on me). Staggering reveals seems challenging!
TITLE: Riverdale
CHARACTER: Archie Andrews
A. Situational: Hope / Fear: hopes to become the new varsity football captain and to be a songwriter / fears he won’t have time for both or won’t succeed at both
B. Motivation: Want / Need: wants to succeed in both football and music / needs to figure out what he wants more because he can’t excel at both
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask: base negative emotion: insecurity / public mask: popular football player who can do it all, going for a football scholarship
D. Weaknesses: overbooked, insecure
E. Triggers: Smart-mouth football players beating him down, people telling him he can’t do something
F. Coping Mechanism: occasional aggression, his music
CHARACTER: Betty Cooper
A. Situational: Hope / Fear: hopes to get to the bottom of her family’s secrets / fears she’ll never live up to her sister
B. Motivation: Want / Need: wants a relationship / needs to fix her relationship with her mother and sister
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask: base negative emotion: overshadowed by her crazy older sister / public mask: good girl, reporter
D. Weaknesses: insecurity
E. Triggers: mentions of her sister
F. Coping Mechanism: talking to friends and family, focusing on others’ problems and investigating, writing in her diary
CHARACTER: Veronica Lodge
A. Situational: Hope / Fear: hopes to ??? / fears her mother’s secrets or being out of the loop
B. Motivation: Want / Need: wants to start over and make friends / needs to accept her past, especially what happened to her father
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask: base negative emotion: attracted to Archie, her best friend’s crush? / public mask: a supportive friend to Archie and Betty
D. Weaknesses: seeing people upset (a soft heart)
E. Triggers: mentions of her father’s crimes
F. Coping Mechanism: bravado
CHARACTER: Cheryl Blossom
A. Situational: Hope / Fear: hopes to ??? / fears moving forward on her own
B. Motivation: Want / Need: Wants to find her brother’s killer and to be the center of attention / needs to accept his death and forgive herself
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask: base negative emotion: loneliness / public mask: bitchiness
D. Weaknesses: fears her neglectful, abusive parents, overly attached to her dead twin, stuck in the past
E. Triggers: talking about Jason
F. Coping Mechanism: snotty, attention-seeking behavior; sleeping in her dead brother’s bed
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Megan’s Intriguing Character Layers – Part 2
What I learned doing this assignment is…
TITLE: My Future Self
Character Name: Lexie
Role: the naive innocent with everything to learn
Hidden agendas: to become someone more exciting
Competition: in competition with her older and younger siblings for recognition from family and friends
Conspiracies: conspires with Alexis to take advantage of knowing the future, conspires with her best friends to keep the email exchange a secret
Secrets: her future self is giving her present advice, she had been previously contemplating running away from home?
Deception: lies to her parents and siblings about the emails
Wound: overheard her parents talking once about how she’ll never be as successful as her older sister
Secret Identity: wannabe superhero
Character Name: Betsy
Role: the athletic childhood best friend
Hidden agendas: to remain Lexie‘s best friend, to undermine Cerise, to take care of her family
Competition: competing with Cerise for Lexie‘s friendship, competing as a freshman for the varsity basketball team, competing for future sports scholarships
Conspiracies: conspires with Lexie to keep her email secret
Secrets: she’s a terrible student
Deception: cheats on tests in order to keep her GPA up
Wound: her father ran out on her family; she’s become like a second mother to her little brother
Secret Identity: the fierce protector
Character Name: Cerise
Role: the blossoming new friendship
Hidden agendas: to become an artist, to move out
Competition: unwillingly competing with Betsy for Lexie‘s friendship
Conspiracies: conspiring with Lexie to cover up the emails, conspires with Betsy to help her get her grades up
Secrets: she has a horrible relationship with her father, who is far too overprotective
Deception: she lies to her father often, she lies to her friends about her relationship with her father, she doesn’t tell her friends that her mother is dead
Wound: the death of her mother
Secret Identity:???
Character Name: Alexis
Role: the jaded professional with nothing left to lose . . . or live for
Hidden agendas: to use this opportunity with Lexie to fix her present by changing the past
Competition: competing with a know-it-all rival agent at work
Conspiracies: conspiring with Lexie to improve both their lives . . . but mostly hers
Secrets: she’s communicating with her past self
Deception: she spends her life telling lies, pretending to be someone she’s not: it’s literally her job
Wound: her best friend Cerise stole her fiancé
Secret Identity: a selfish, scared child
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Megan’s Intriguing Character Layers – Part 1
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I know a lot more about these characters than I realized. Layers are revealed so gradually you almost don’t even notice it’s happening as you watch the episode. When new information is finally revealed, it gives the audience a sense of shock and discovery (For example, finding out Mrs. Grundy had an independent study with the dead Jason Blossom the previous year; or that Jughead’s father is a gang member of the Southside Serpents; or that Jughead has been living in the Twilight Drive-in)
I keep wondering, though, how I can incorporate such serious layers and still keep my show in the vein of a comedy.
TITLE: Riverdale
Character Name: Archie Andrews
Role: the popular football player heartthrob
Hidden agendas: he wants to become a musician no matter what his dad wants for him; wants a relationship with the music teacher
Competition:
Conspiracies: covering up with the music teacher the fact that he heard a gunshot on July 4
Secrets: hooking up with the music teacher; heard a gunshot on July 4
Deception: sneaking out when grounded
Wound: ???
Secret Identity: tortured artist
Character Name: Betty Cooper
Role: the all-American good girl next-door; Archie’s best friend
Hidden agendas: to get revenge for her sister Polly, to act as undercover agent solving the secrets of Riverdale; maintaining a friendship with Archie and Veronica despite her mother’s disapproval
Competition: competing with Veronica and Mrs. Grundy for Archie; competing with her mother for control over her life
Conspiracies: working with Veronica to take revenge on the football boys
Secrets: crazy runs in her family
Deception: hanging out with Archie and Veronica despite her mother’s disapproval; is her good girl act just an act?
Wound: her sister Polly’s mistreatment and insanity
Secret Identity: Nancy Drew / avenging angel
Character Name: Veronica Lodge
Role: the mysterious, rich, misunderstood newcomer
Hidden agendas: A fresh start in a new town; figuring out what shady business her mother is involved in
Competition: competing with Cheryl for Betty’s friendship
Conspiracies: working with Betty to take revenge on the football boys; breaking into Mrs. Grundy‘s car with Betty; covering up the conspiracy of her father and mother to buy out Riverdale
Secrets: why she came to Riverdale?
Deception: hooking up in the closet with Archie even when she knew Betty liked him, spying on her mother
Wound: being viewed or treated as a slut?
Secret Identity: ???
Character Name: Cheryl Blossom
Role: the bitchy cheerleader captain
Hidden agendas: to find the person responsible for murdering Jason
Competition: competing with Veronica for it girl of the school
Conspiracies: working with Betty and Veronica to get revenge for slut shaming
Secrets: she was helping Jason leave Riverdale before he died
Deception: she feigns ignorance in Jason‘s death to the police
Wound: losing her twin brother has clearly wounded her
Secret Identity: ???
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Megan’s Engaging Main Characters – Part 2
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I can’t expect all the answers to all the questions right away.
TITLE: My Future Self
1. Tell us the journey of your show.
Lexie is an intellectual with almost no real-world experience. Everything scares her, even when she doesn’t show it. Yet she longs for a more interesting life. She lives vicariously through her future self but in the process becomes braver and more daring in the present.
Alexis, Lexie’s future self, has screwed up more times than she can count. She’s pushed friends and family away. She is utterly alone. She sees Lexie as her opportunity to not only make amends but to possibly get back what she’s lost.
2. Who are the main characters that will sell your show?
Lexie: 15-year-old freshman in high school who has no idea how to begin to live
Alexis: 33-year-old undercover operative who loathes herself, her life, and her life choices
3. Answer these questions for each of those characters.
A. Role in the show:
Lexie: the naive innocent with everything to learn
Alexis: the jaded professional with nothing left to lose . . . or live for
B. Unique Purpose / Expertise:
Lexie: Purpose: to give Alexis a project to make her life meaningful again
Alexis: Expertise: she knows where she went wrong (hindsight is 20/20) and she’s hoping with the right advice she’ll make a positive impact on Lexie’s life and, therefore, on her own
C. Intrigue: What is the secret beneath the surface?
Lexie: contemplated running away from home before she got Alexis’s email response? She would love to go to college out of state just for a fresh start.
Alexis: on the verge of suicide the night she got Lexie’s email; Alexis is helping Lexie more for herself than for Lexie?
D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing?
Lexie: considers get-rich-quick schemes using future knowledge
Alexis: messing with the past for selfish reasons could completely change other people’s presents and futures
E. Unpredictable: What will they do next?
Lexie: the more she interacts with Alexis, the bolder should becomes; the change surprises everyone: family, friends, teachers
Alexis: sometimes she is the moral compass, sometimes she is not; we never know if the advice Alexis is giving is good for Lexie or good for herself; she is still a trained operative
F. Empathetic: Why do we care?
Lexie: she’s the one in her family who gets left out because she’s unexceptional
Alexis: she’s entirely alone
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Megan’s Engaging Main Characters – Part 1
What I learned doing this assignment is…that every main character needs intrigue and a moral issue they grapple with. They need to be unpredictable yet empathetic. I also learned that it takes several episodes to reveal these traits in all of your main characters, but they should all be developed during planning.
TITLE: Riverdale
A. Role in the show:
Archie: the popular football player heartthrob
Betty: the All-American good girl next-door
Veronica: the mysterious, rich, misunderstood newcomer
Cheryl: the bitchy cheerleading captain
B. Unique Purpose / Expertise:
Archie: Purpose: the popular kid who’s trying to find himself
Betty: Purpose: the reporter seeking truth and justice
Veronica: Purpose: the sex appeal
Cheryl: Purpose: the tragic but bitchy sister of the victim
C. Intrigue: What is the secret beneath the surface?
Archie: heard the gunshot when he was hooking up with the teacher
Betty: her sister is in a psych ward; good girl who comes up with a plan for vengeance against the football players; is she crazy as well? (why does she dress up like her crazy sister?)
Veronica: ??? (nothing I’ve caught yet)
Cheryl: was there something more between her and her brother? Did she have something to do with his death?
D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing?
Archie: hooking up with the music teacher; sneaking out while grounded
Betty: breaking into the school to investigate; disobeying her mother
Veronica: breaking into the school to investigate
Cheryl: was there something more between her and her brother? Did she have something to do with his death?
E. Unpredictable: What will they do next?
Archie: decides to come clean about Mrs. Grundy
Betty: good girl who breaks into the school to investigate
Veronica: hooks up with Archie, comforts Cheryl unexpectedly, always on the edge of a fight
Cheryl: declares she’s guilty of her brother‘s death
F. Empathetic: Why do we care?
Archie: he’s a misunderstood musician who tries to do the right thing
Betty: she loves someone who doesn’t love her back
Veronica: she’s trying to be different now and make friends
Cheryl: she lost her brother; she apologizes for Jason‘s mistakes
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Megan’s Three Circles of Characters – Day 2
What I learned doing this assignment is . . . that by starting off listing the main characters and thinking about their individual worlds, I can brainstorm a slew of other connected characters I hadn’t previously considered. Still feel like I’m not quite done.
I’m also not certain yet which of my three TV ideas to go with for this program so I’m going to start with Idea #1:
MY SHOW: My Future Self
A. Main Characters Circle:
Lexie: 15-year-old freshman; good student, bookish, detail-oriented but unadventurous
Betsy: Lexie’s best friend; a tomboy, very athletic, and sarcastic, who speaks with no filter and sometimes comes across hurtful or tactless
Cerise: the relative newcomer to the friend group; a transfer to the school system, she is very quiet, artistic, intelligent, observant, slow to open up
Alexis: Lexie’s 33-year-old self; ostensibly a professional living in Chicago but actually an undercover agent; cold, disconnected, a lone wolf
Brett: Alexis’s undercover partner who would love something more than just a partnership with the ice queen
B. Connected Circle:
Lily: Lexie’s genius older sister
Scott: Lexie’s popular baby brother
Dylan: Lexie’s veteran-turned-businessman alcoholic father
Amanda: Lexie’s nurse mother
Tony Moretti: Lexie’s biology partner
Mason: Lexie’s secret crush and coworker
Miss Parker: high school librarian
Mrs. McNeil: Freshman English teacher
Mr. Marco Moretti: Lexie’s boss at the restaurant
Coach Simpson: Betsy’s basketball coach
Margo: cheer captain and Betsy’s nemesis
Marcus: Betsy’s seven-year-old brother whom she’s very attached to and protective of
Cerise’s father: an overprotective widower
Mr. Osborne: high school art teacher, who sees rare talent in Cerise
Elizabeth: the adult version of Betsy, who seemed to undergo a complete personality change when she blossomed into a model
Racquel: Elizabeth’s modeling agent
Xavier: Alexis’s college boyfriend and the cause of the end of her friendship with Cerise
Assistant Director John Waters: Alexis‘s boss
Hunter Ridgley: owner of the nearby shooting range Alexis frequents
Sterling: A nosy undercover operative
C. Environment Circle:
High school students
College students
Football players
Girls basketball team
Cheerleaders
Wait staff, dishwashers, cooks, patrons
Teachers
Professors
Secretaries
Principal
Townspeople
Undercover agents
Agent program director
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Megan’s Three Circles of Characters
What I learned doing this assignment is . . . connected characters are much more difficult to brainstorm. While I had already thought through my main characters and environmental characters came to mind naturally, it was harder to figure out who might interact with my main characters on a fairly regular basis.
I definitely see a benefit in thinking through connected characters, though. It provides more opportunity for content, conflict, intrigue. I’ve always relied on the plot to spawn my characters; this time I’m proactively trying to birth characters I’m not even sure I’ll use. It’s an interesting and mentally challenging activity.
TITLE: Riverdale
A. Main Characters Circle:
Archie Andrews
Betty
Veronica Lodge
Cheryl Blossom
B. Connected Circle:
Jughead? (possibly a main character)
Mrs. Grundy
Jason Blossom
Archie’s dad
Betty’s mom
Hermione, Veronica‘s mom
Kevin
Moose
Polly
C. Environment Circle:
Mr. and Mrs. Blossom? (possibly connected circle)
Policeman
Investigators
Sheriff
Mortician
Students
Football players
Cheerleaders
Teachers
Secretaries
Principal
Townspeople
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Riverdale 5-Star Model
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I don’t have to particularly like a TV show to learn something from it. I was a bit surprised when I looked over the list of approved binge worthy TV shows that none of them seem to be comedies, which is my preferred genre. I wonder if anyone can recommend a binge worthy comedy series? Some of my favorite comedic TV shows include “The Big Bang Theory,” “How I Met Your Mother,” “The Office,” “That 70s Show,” “New Girl,” and “Parks and Rec.” I just want to know if it’s possible to still create a comedy with this binge worthy, serial-style model. (I do feel like most, if not all, of these TV shows fit that model from what we discussed in lesson 1.)
TITLE: Riverdale
BEATS:
Intro to the town of Riverdale and mystery of missing Blossom twin
Veronica arrives to town.
Betty has a date with Archie, who shares his musical aspirations, until the date is interrupted by Veronica.
First day of school: Betty gives Veronica a tour.
Veronica reveals her dad is the devil incarnate.
Archie approaches Josie and the pussycat with his songs.
Assembly in honor of Jason Blossom
Flashback to Archie hooking up with Miss Grundy, the music teacher
Archie’s father meets with Veronica‘s mother on the job site looking for work
Archie plays his music for Betty, Veronica, and Kevin.
Cheryl Blossom meets Veronica and tries to talk Veronica into the cheerleading team.
Veronica offers to help Betty prep to try it for cheerleading.
Archie shows his music to Miss Grundy, the music teacher.
Flashback to Miss Grundy and Archie hearing a gunshot
Cheerleading tryouts for Betty and Veronica in which Cheryl confronts Betty about her older sister Polly’s relationship with Cheryl‘s brother Jason; Veronica’s defense of Betty sets her up as Betty’s defender against Cheryl, the antagonist
Archie makes the varsity football team as a sophomore.
Betty and Veronica both make the cheerleading team. Betty opens up to Veronica about the family dynamic between her mother and sister.
Betty and Veronica invite Archie to go to the dance with both of them.
Betty’s mom tells her she can’t be a cheerleader and Betty tells her no.
Hermione‘s (Veronica‘s mom) missing bag turns up with a bunch of money in it.
Archie tells his dad he wants to write music, not play football or go to business school.
Archie attends the dance with both Betty and Veronica.
Archie talks to Mrs. Grundy at the dance about an independent study.
Betty pursues becoming a couple with Archie. He seems distracted by Mrs. Grundy.
Cheryl Blossom invites Betty and Veronica to her afterparty.
Veronica plays seven minutes in heaven with Archie and Archie admits he doesn’t feel anything for Betty. They hook up.
We meet Jughead the narrator at Pops.
Archie goes to Betty’s house and says he’ll never be good enough for Betty.
Kevin discovers Jason’s body in the lake and the narrator hints that the first arrest will take place by fifth hour tomorrow.
5 STAR POINTS:
Big Picture Hooks
Ask this: What is the big hook of this show? I’m assuming it’s the tie-in to the comic book series, though I’ve never read it.
Amazing and Intriguing Character
Ask this: What makes these main characters intriguing and interesting? I suppose the depth of backstory is intriguing; everyone has a story, a history that we have to keep watching to uncover. There are at least two clear love triangles (Archie, Betty, Veronica; Archie, Betty, and Mrs. Grundy). There are also obvious alliances and antipathies between the characters, both students and adults, which sets up for future conflict. None of the characters, though, seem highly unusual.
Empathy / Distress
Ask this: What situation causes us to feel both empathy and distress for this character? Empathy for Betty because she’s an outsider on the cheer team. Empathy for Betty whose sister was taken advantage of by Jason Blossom and is now in a psych ward from the sound of it. Empathy for Veronica for being the new girl with a dislikable dad. Empathy for Archie for having a dream no one seems to support. Empathy for Betty because Archie doesn’t want her no matter how hard she tries. Empathy for Jughead, who seems to be a total outsider.
Layers / Open Loops
Ask this: What questions are created by this first episode that can only be answered by watching the entire season? Where did Hermione (Veronica’s mother) get the bag of money? What happened to Jason Blossom? Did one of the students have something to do with his death? Will Archie end up with Betty or Veronica? Will Archie hook up again with Mrs. Grundy? Will she get fired for sleeping with a student? What was the gunshot Mrs. Grundy and Archie heard?
Inviting Obsession
Ask this: How does this pilot create the need to see every single episode? Relatable high school situations, relatable high school and adult characters draw in a large age range of viewers, mystery, intrigue, a plethora of conflict already established in the pilot
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Megan Schemenauer
I agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
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Good morning from EST!
My name is Megan Schemenauer. I’m originally a playwright with just over a dozen scripts on the market. During the pandemic, I started to test the waters of screenwriting and now have written 4 features to date. Hoping to learn more about how to structure and write a series for television so I can get a few ideas out of my brain.