

Russell Phillips
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Day 10 & 11 outline assignments take me back to what I said in my introduction. Excited to take advantage of the great deal on this course & learn what I can about the Contained Screenplay information in it. But the timing is a bit off for me to give the focused attention to developing a complete story. Even the “90 minutes” to put together the outline the class is looking for is beyond what I have to devote to it, and honestly, my project is nowhere near where I want it to move to a serious outlining phase. SO much more conceptualizing work to do. I’ve done what I can to keep up with the spirit of the assignments, but not enough for it to be fully formed & satisfying.
I’m reposting some preliminary outline material in the Day 11 response. But I don’t expect anyone to waste much time on giving me feedback on what I have at this point.
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Day 10 & 11 outline assignments take me back to what I said in my introduction. Excited to take advantage of the great deal on this course & learn what I can about the Contained Screenplay information in it. But the timing is a bit off for me to give the focused attention to developing a complete story. Even the “90 minutes” to put together the outline the class is looking for is beyond what I have to devote to it, and honestly, my project is nowhere near where I want it to move to a serious outlining phase. SO much more conceptualizing work to do. I’ve done what I can to keep up with the spirit of the assignments, but not enough for it to be fully formed & satisfying.
So, for Exercise 11, the best I have is a repost of previous structure material:
OUTLINE STRUCTURE (from Contained class):
Act 1:
Opening
– Chase moves into a remote country
house with a large tree stump in the backyard. His family remains behind
for the end of the school year.
Inciting Incident – An item of
torn clothes shows up on the stump.
Turning Point – A second
persona item mysterious shows up, this time covered in blood.Act 2:
New plan – Kindly old neighbors
inform Chase about the house being the former property of a suspected
killer who hung himself from the tree that is now the stump. Chase begins
to obsess on the stump items, decides to observe.
Plan in action – Cameras fail
at zero hour. More times arrive. He sits out to watch, but cannot stay
awake. His behavior becomes more erratic & obsessed.
Midpoint Turning Point – Something
shows up which may belong to his family. He cannot reach them. Something seems
to be stalking him in the woods bordering the property.Act 3:
Rethink everything – There may
be a supernatural or otherworldly explanation.
New plan – Destroy the stump. The
neighbor brings a stump grinder.
Turning Point: Huge failure /
Major shift – The stump erupts in blood and flesh when ground. Then cannot
be destroyed – it returns.Act 4:
Final plan – Hunt the things in
the woods.
Climax/Ultimate expression of
the conflict – TBD
Resolution – None. He may be
insane, in hell, or on another planet.<br clear=”all”>
Hope & Fear Exercise (Contained Class)
ACT ONE
HOPE: Chase had made a
good purchase of the house for a fresh start for his family.FEAR: He is alone in the
house. He has no transportation, they are a one-car family. His wife &
kid are held up in Chicago.FEAR: What’s in the ominous
shed? Are there things moving in the forest bordering the property?HOPE: Chase seems eager to
refurbish the house. He’s not depressed being alone. He’s inspired.FEAR: The first random
item of clothes turns up on the stump in the backyard.HOPE: Chase meets kindly
neighbor(s) in Mr/Mrs Dickens. Welcome to the “neighborhood”, such as it
is, rather remote. But it’s a close-knit community.FEAR: The previous owner
of the house is a story no one wants to tell.HOPE: Strange things
happening on the property, like left-behind clothes, are probably nothing
more than town teenagers who head out to the country to party. Nothing to
worry about.FEAR: The next item to
show up randomly on the stump comes blood-soaked.ACT TWO
HOPE: Chase sets up a
security camera to watch the stump at night.FEAR: The camera ‘malfunctions’
at the precise moment the next item appears on the stump, leaving the
phenomenon a mystery.FEAR: Chase becomes more
obsessed. Behavior stranger. Won’t call the authorities.HOPE: Mr/Mrs Dickens
checks in on him.FEAR: When pressed,
Dickens reveals that the old owner of the property, Godwyn, was a
suspected murderer who hung himself in the tree before it was cut down to
this stump.HOPE: Chase plans to sit
up all night and watch the stump himself.FEAR: The woods at night
are terrifying. Things seem to be moving around in the forest and hunting
other unseen things. Howls and screeches. Movements that don’t seem
natural. Chase retreats inside before anything appears on the stump.HOPE: Nothing follows him
inside. Maybe if he ignores it, there is no real danger.FEAR: Cannot get ahold of
his wife & kid back in Chicago. They are supposed to be on their way
by now.FEAR: The next morning
brings a new gore-coated item, and it just might be something belonging to
Chase’s wife.ACT THREE
HOPE: Chase reaches
someone else, a family friend, who assures him that everything is alright
with his family.HOPE: Dickens has a stump
grinder and is happy to come to get rid of the stump if Chase wants.FEAR: Chase has worsening
nightmares about ghoulish things that might be demons or monstrous alien
beings. He is coming unglued.HOPE: Chase invites
Dickens to come to destroy the stump with the grinder.FEAR: When ground, the stump
erupts in blood & gore.FEAR: The next day, the
stump returns unblemished.ACT FOUR
HOPE: Chase tries to
arrange transportation away from the house.FEAR: Despite his
persistent check-ins, no transport arrives.FEAR: Night falls. The
things in the woods are active as ever.HOPE & FEAR: Chase
arms himself and goes off to confront whatever is out there. -
Russ’s Budget
What I learned in this assignment is… well, not that much. It’s a fantastic lesson and list of areas to be mindful of. But so far as the project that I’m focused on, it’s one location with maybe 3 to 5 characters max and mostly just one person on-screen.
This script could easily be a micro-budget film and would probably seem fairly high-production-value at “low budget”. So as far as the Main and Secondary variables go, there’s not much room to slash to go lower.
It is a horror flick, so there is a minimum required amount of special & make-up FX, some minor violence possible (limited stuntwork), and it really does require some night shooting.
NOT to fly in the face of Hal’s concerns about writers shutting down possibilities. I think if a potential producer needed to push to trim in those areas, it could be done. But it’s already pretty bare-bones in my mind as-is relative to the lists.
Considering a LARGER budget, then, maybe there is the potential to add some material at other locations, potentially opening up the story to allow for a few more characters. But the big opportunity would be to beef up the bang for the buck in the FX areas.
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Russ writes great Hope & fear
What I learned doing this assignment is I think this story has potential.
ACT ONE
HOPE: Chase had made a good purchase of the house for a fresh start for his family.
FEAR: He is alone in the house. He has no transportation, they are a one-car family. His wife & kid are held up in Chicago.
FEAR: What’s in the ominous shed? Are there things moving in the forest bordering the property?
HOPE: Chase seems eager to refurbish the house. He’s not depressed being alone. He’s inspired.
FEAR: The first random item of clothes turns up on the stump in the backyard.
HOPE: Chase meets kindly neighbor(s) in Mr/Mrs Dickens. Welcome to the “neighborhood”, such as it is, rather remote. But it’s a close-knit community.
FEAR: The previous owner of the house is a story no one wants to tell.
HOPE: Strange things happening on the property, like left-behind clothes, are probably nothing more than town teenagers who head out to the country to party. Nothing to worry about.
FEAR: The next item to show up randomly on the stump comes blood-soaked.
ACT TWO
HOPE: Chase sets up a security camera to watch the stump at night.
FEAR: The camera ‘malfunctions’ at the precise moment the next item appears on the stump, leaving the phenomenon a mystery.
FEAR: Chase becomes more obsessed. Behavior stranger. Won’t call the authorities.
HOPE: Mr/Mrs Dickens checks in on him.
FEAR: When pressed, Dickens reveals that the old owner of the property, Godwyn, was a suspected murderer who hung himself in the tree before it was cut down to this stump.
HOPE: Chase plans to sit up all night and watch the stump himself.
FEAR: The woods at night are terrifying. Things seem to be moving around in the forest and hunting other unseen things. Howls and screeches. Movements that don’t seem natural. Chase retreats inside before anything appears on the stump.
HOPE: Nothing follows him inside. Maybe if he ignores it, there is no real danger.
FEAR: Cannot get ahold of his wife & kid back in Chicago. They are supposed to be on their way by now.
FEAR: The next morning brings a new gore-coated item, and it just might be something belonging to Chase’s wife.
ACT THREE
HOPE: Chase reaches someone else, a family friend, who assures him that everything is alright with his family.
HOPE: Dickens has a stump grinder and is happy to come to get rid of the stump if Chase wants.
FEAR: Chase has worsening nightmares about ghoulish things that might be demons or monstrous alien beings. He is coming unglued.
HOPE: Chase invites Dickens to come to destroy the stump with the grinder.
FEAR: When ground, the stump erupts in blood & gore.
FEAR: The next day, the stump returns unblemished.
ACT FOUR
HOPE: Chase tries to arrange transportation away from the house.
FEAR: Despite his persistent check-ins, no transport arrives.
FEAR: Night falls. The things in the woods are active as ever.
HOPE & FEAR: Chase arms himself and goes off to confront whatever is out there.
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Russ’s 4 Act Structure
What I learned is this story may have potential as an ambiguous psychological horror.
Act 1:
Opening
– Chase moves into a remote country
house with a large tree stump in the backyard. His family remains behind
for the end of the school year.Inciting
Incident – An item of torn clothes shows up on the stump.Turning
Point – A second personal item mysterious shows up, this time covered in
blood.Act 2:
New
plan – Kindly old neighbors inform Chase about the house being the former property
of a suspected killer who hung himself from the tree that is now the
stump. Chase begins to obsess on the stump items, decides to observe.Plan
in action – Cameras fail at the zero hour. More items arrive. He sits out to
watch, but cannot stay awake. His behavior becomes more erratic &
obsessed.Midpoint
Turning Point – Something shows up which may belong to his family. He cannot
reach them. Something seems to be stalking him in the woods bordering the
property.Act 3:
Rethink
everything – There may be a supernatural or otherworldly explanation.New
plan – Destroy the stump. The neighbor brings a stump grinder.Turning
Point: Huge failure / Major shift – The stump erupts in blood and flesh
when ground. Then cannot be destroyed – it returns.Act 4:
Final
plan – Hunt the things in the woods.Climax/Ultimate
expression of the conflict – TBDResolution
– None. He may be insane, in hell, or on another planet.-
This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by
Russell Phillips.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by
Russell Phillips.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by
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Russ’s Delivering Multiple Layers
What I learned doing this assignment is my particular story blurs lines between location & character.
There is very little in the setup that is/should be/can be anything we haven’t seen before. The effectiveness plays upon our familiarity.
This is a “Man Moves into a Creepy Remote House” that turns into a psychological and/or supernatural horror journey. I don’t think this is the type of story where it’s satisfying if those questions are answered clearly. It’s totally about the EXECUTION of the downward spiral into madness and leaving them guessing about whether this is a real phenomenon driving the character insane, this is some version of a personal hell, or this is all some surreal representation of an already off-the-rails mind feeding itself an experience.
Superficially:
Surface Layer: Items begin to show up on the stump in the backyard.
Beneath That: These items point to the belongings of the dead (killer’s victims?), and they seem to come from nowhere, just showing up at some point in the middle of the night.
How Revealed: Character decides to focus attention on the phenomenon, but cameras fail and he cannot keep his eyes open at the zero hour as the phenomenon repeats. It cannot be observed.
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What I learned doing this assignment is… limited for the time being.
My focus in taking this course is the ‘contained’ script information. This seems like a valuable exercise for thinking about a character’s journey through a story, but not specific to contained scripts. There are more tools I would use to build my character which are unrelated to this system, and I would employ those before using this exercise to structure a timeline. But I do see the value in this.
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Russ’s Character Depth
What I learned doing this assignment is to better connect my Character with the concept. At present, I don’t know that there is more than one on-screen character, as it’s a man alone in a newly purchased house with a history, psychological horror story. So the conflict will need to be largely internal (or external representations of it). But some intriguing new ideas/avenues to explore about how to warp this guy to make him more compelling as a loner.
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Russ Phillips’ Right Characters
What I learned doing this assignment are some great brainstorming questions to get me under my characters’ skin.
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Russ’s Great Hook
A. How did this process work for you?
A little forced. but then I’m not really in the headspace for working on a new script right now. I’m developing 5 ideas I had archived for the purposes of taking the class. As I said in my introduction, I jumped on the opportunity for this course at the price, though the timing is poor with other things I am working on.
All that said, it’s an interesting exercise.
B. What did you learn doing this assignment?
Good methodology for honing a contained script idea.
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As I clarified in my Introduction, I’m going to do my best to respond to the assignments. Here are five ideas that might make contained stories:
IDEA 1: CHRONIC PROBLEMS OF A DEEP-SPACE WAREHOUSE MANAGER (sci-fi/stoner comedy)
A. Contained Environment: Space station warehouse/interstellar customs on the edge of the solar systemB. Contained Characters: a skeleton crew
C. Difficult Situation: This facility is close to shutting down as shipping lanes have changed. Under limited supervision, the manager has been engaged in black market deals & bribes, but now finds his facility under attack by a vicious species being smuggled into the solar system.
D. Reason for the Containment: space station
Idea 2<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>: Courier Logistics (dramatic comedy)A. Contained Environment: mainly one pick-up truck/van, limited outside environs as needed
B. Contained Characters: a delivery driver
C. Difficult Situation: day In the life, being sent with a delivery to a remote area
D. Reason for the Containment: it’s a lonely profession
Idea 3: 5 Part Series (thriller)
A. Contained Environment: An apartment/house
B. Contained Characters: one TV viewer
C. Difficult Situation: Returning home from a trip, while catching up with a recorded news magazine feature that unfolded in a 5-part series, a viewer slowly realizes the subject of the feature – an infamous killer/criminal law enforcement is looking for – might just be their next-door neighbor.
D. Reason for the Containment: Watching TV in the living room, looking out the window at the neighbor.
Idea 4: Eminent Domain (horror)
A. Contained Environment: Ranch house
B. Contained Characters: Old Man and Investigators
C. Difficult Situation: Old Man who owns the ranch property never takes visitors. In reality, he is hundreds (thousands) of years old, cursed to never die but under the watch of a demon who slaughters anyone Old Man speaks with. Destined to live eternity alone. Now the government wants to force a sale of the property. As investigators go missing, more come.
D. Reason for the Containment: Cursed to live alone.
Idea 5: Godwyn’s Stump (horror)
A. Contained Environment: A country house
B. Contained Characters: A husband & father
C. Difficult Situation: Man buys a house with a stump in the back yard. He moves in several months before his family will arrive, as they wrap up the school year, the old house sells, etc. and he starts his new job. Then things begin to appear on the stump. Items. Bits of clothes. At first, he thinks it’s a prank but soon realizes that it’s a supernatural phenomenon. And these items start coming soaked in blood—wherever they come from, they’re the belongings of people being killed.
D. Reason for the Containment: Phenomenon confined to the yard.
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Hafa adai and Konnichiwa!
That’s how you say “hello” in Guam and in Japan. I’m Russ Phillips, and those are the places our family has lived in the last two years. My wife has a job in education working in US military base schools. This has given me an unique opportunity to focus on writing as never before. It’s late in the game to get started, but there’s no sense in whining about Hollywood ageism or decks being stacked against me. They’re stacked against everyone, so best to just focus on producing dynamite material that makes people look past your wrinkles and take notice.
Over the years, I’ve written more than a dozen spec scripts. None produced to date. Very little by way of marketing myself. Several of them have created some connections. One indie producer has remained committed to a project I wrote for over a decade now, but just hasn’t had all the tumblers fall into place at the same time to pull it off. Bless his heart.
I have never taken a ScreenwritingU course before, so I’m learning the format & expectations for the first time. I signed up for this course for two main reasons:
1. I concur with the marketing pitch that the Covid situation places a premium on “contained” stories right now and for the immediate future. On the other hand, I struggle to keep my stories from ballooning in scope. So I felt I could benefit from a perspective in that area. Certainly accept that my best chance for making a first splash is with something smaller.
2. The iron was hot for the deal offered. The price was right.
I’m starting out a bit behind the 8-ball. If I had taken a course through ScreenU before, I would have expected there to be as much “homework” as there apparently is. Not a complaint. The pitch fo the course sold me on it, even though the timing is poor given how busy I am. So I likely have to accept I’ll be taking this course to get the most out of it I can but not necessarily excelling at it. I’ll have to do my best to contribute to the Forums and respond to the coursework.
Believe me, I’m sensitive operating against a deadline when I’m on the hook for a paid assignment. I hate not being in a position to give it my best.
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I agree to the terms of this release form.
– Russ PhillipsGROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.