
Stafford Echols
Forum Replies Created
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Stafford’s Act 3 Turning Point
What I learned from this assignment was at some point in the story… My lead is going to hit rock bottom. The walls around them are crumbling and they feel absolutely helpless. Now, is where we see what they’re really made of, and how they will prevail.
- Beginning – Mateo reluctantly walks into the police precinct.
- Middle – Mateo opens up to Detective Fuentes, and reveals his suspicions about Glorivetts’s wrong-doings.
- End – As Mateo’s about to leave, Detective Fuentes tells Mateo he’ll look more into Glorivette’s past, and Mateo should be careful in the meantime.
INT. POLICE PRECINCT – DAY
Mateo steps inside. Looks restless as he moves past the traffic taking place. He approaches an OFFICER, 60s. Looks like he’s ready to retire. He gazes upward at Mateo —
OFFICER
Can I help you?
MATEO
Um, yeah. I’m here to see Detective Fuentes. He around?
OFFICER
All right, hang on.
The officer picks up a phone, dials an extension…
OFFICER (CONT’D)
Yeah, Gus… Someone’s here to see ya. All right.
The officer hangs up.
OFFICER (CONT’D)
He’ll be right with you.
INT. POLICE PRECINCT – OFFICE – DAY
Gus opens the door —
GUS
We can talk in here.(shuts on the light)Take a seat anywhere, Mr. Vargas.
Mateo steps inside. Takes a seat as Gus shuts the door.
GUS(sits on desk)
What is it I can for you?
MATEO
Thanks for seeing me on such short notice. I didn’t have no place else to run.
GUS
What the matter? Are you all right? You don’t look too good.
Mateo sighs. Grips the back of his neck.
MATEO
Things have been weird at Aceveda Logistics. Long before the poison incident at the pot luck. It’s, it’s this woman–
GUS
Woman?
MATEO
Glorivette Gomez. She’s a temp at the job. We hooked up once or twice– When I refused her advances and broke things off… she changed.
GUS
For the worse, I assume.
MATEO
My good friend suddenly dies in a freak accident. My supervisor is murdered. My boss is missing. And all of a sudden people get sick after drinking punch?
GUS
Why didn’t come forward before?
MATEO
You can’t bark these kind of allegations without proof, Detective. Gotta admit, she’s pretty good at covering her tracks. Bitch has successfully disturbed my peace at work and my home.(scoffs)She told my fiancé about us. And now I’m out on my ass; living in a shitty motel. Where she Glorivette showed up and attacked me. I’m here to get a restraining order.
GUS
That can be arranged. If you feel your life is really in danger.
MATEO
I do. And I’m coming to you before I do something I’ll regret. That woman… is a different kind of dangerous. I’m scared for my life, and she’s backing me in a corner– I… I need your help, Detective. I’m not trying to become a savage to slay my demons.
Beat. Gus stands to his feet. Paces around the office.
GUS
I’ll look more into Glorivette’s past. See what comes up.
Mateo shakes Gus’ hand.
MATEO
Thank you, Detective! Thank you so much.
Mateo stands, prepares to leave the office —
GUS
Uh, Mr. Vargas… if anything else comes up, don’t hesitate to reach out. You can file the restraining order at the front desk. And if Miss Gomez is as dangerous as you say… I’d watch my back if I were you.
Mateo nods. Shuts the door after he exits.
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Stafford’s Act 3 Reaction to Midpoint
What I learned from this assignment, like any other story, everything has a cause and effect. For every setup we create, it has to follow through with a pay-off.
Midpoint: Marisol confronts Mateo about his affair with Glorivette; she kicks him out, and Mateo checks into a motel.
Reaction/Rethink: Glorivette shows up to Mateo’s motel room. Continues to harass and threatens his life. A huge fight breaks out between the two, Miguel threatens Glorivette’s life to show that he’s as crazy as she is.
INT. MOTEL – FRONT OFFICE – NIGHT
Frustrated look on his face, Mateo carries his work-bag on his shoulder as he leans on the counter —
MATEO
A room, please.
MOTEL CLERK, mid 30’s. Stands behind the counter as he types on a computer.
MOTEL CLERK
I.D.
Mateo pulls his wallet from his back pocket — passes his I.D. to the motel clerk.
MOTEL CLERK
Thank you.(types at computer)Would you prefer a standard bed or king?
MATEO
Doesn’t matter.
MOTEL CLERK
And how many nights?
MATEO(annoyed)
Not sure. Can you just get me the room?
INT. MOTEL ROOM – NIGHT
Mateo lies in his bed. Stares at the ceiling. Probably wondering how did he get here.
MATEO
Puta madre.
Mateo shuts off lamp next to his bed. The room goes dark.
INT. MOTEL ROOM – NIGHT
Mateo sits in a chair. Watches TV as he eats Chinese food from the carton and sips on a beer. He hears a KNOCK at the door; catches him off guard.
Mateo sets his food and beer next to the TV as he prepares to open the door.
He wipes his mouth. Opens the door to see Glorivette standing there.
MATEO
What the hell are you doing here? How’d you find me?
GLORIVETTE
Relax… I just want to talk, Mateo.
MATEO
We’ve got nothin’ to discuss, bruja. Adios!
Mateo closes the door, Glorivette uses her hand to push it back open —
GLORIVETTE
I think you might want to hear what I have to say.
Mateo’s reluctant to open the door; lets Glorivette inside.
Mateo shuts the room door. Glorivette studies the room.
GLORIVETTE(amused)
I guess Marisol didn’t take my news very well?
MATEO
What the fuck did you say to her?
GLORIVETTE
Nothing but the truth. I found her Facebook– Didn’t expect her to respond to my message so fast.
MATEO
Are you fucking crazy? Do you know what you’ve done? You possibly ruined my life.
GLORIVETTE
Now, we can finally be together–
MATEO
Not a chance! Never!
GLORIVETTE
What is it about her? Look at me, and look at her. I know you still think about our time together–
MATEO
Callate! I don’t wanna hear it! You need to go!
GLORIVETTE
You must not understand how this works: If I can’t have you, no one will.
MATEO
You keep the Mari, entender?
GLORIVETTE
What are you gonna do, eh? You don’t have the “cojones” to stop me.
MATEO
You’re fuckin’ crazy. Get out! Ahora!
GLORIVETTE
Fine! Go back to that disgusting perra you’re so “committed” to.
MATEO
I’d choose her over you any day, pendeja. Face the fact that you’re a washed up skank and a lousy lay. Now get the hell out of here.
Mateo turns his back.
Glorivette’s triggered. Grabs Mateo’s beer bottle —
GLORIVETTE(SMASHES bottle over Mateo’s head)
Pinche cabron!
MATEO
Mierda!
Glorivette hops on Mateo’s back with her arms around his neck.
She CHOKES and digs her nails in his face. They destroy the room; KNOCKS over the TV.
MATEO
Ahh!
Mateo SWINGS Glorivette off his back. She BOUNCES off the bed.
Glorivette gets off the ground — JUMPS over the bed to attack again.
Mateo tries to restrain her. Glorivette SCREAMS as she hits him.
Mateo STRIKES Glorivette in the face. She falls back on the bed. Mateo GRIPS her by the throat —
MATEO
Look at me! Look…at…me! You listen… if you come near me or Mari again– I’m gonna show you how loco I can be! I can be just as crazy as you! I’m gonna hurt! I’m gonna–
Mateo grabs Glorivette by her hair —
MATEO
Get the fuck outta here!
Mateo DRAGS Glorivette on the floor. Pulls her by the door. Opens and throws Glorivette out of his room. SLAMS the door shut. Glorivette kicks at the door —
GLORIVETTE (O.S.)
You haven’t heard the last of me, pendejo!
Mateo, out of breath, sits on his bed as he looks towards the door.
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Stafford’s Act 2 TP – Midpoint
What I learned from this assignment was how these scenes are helping me bridge the gaps. The more I keep watering the story, the easier it’s developing my draft.
INT. FUNERAL HOME – EVENING
POTRAIT
A younger version of Ricky in a tuxedo. Silent cries and whimpers can be heard in the background.
EXT. FUNERAL HOME – NIGHT
FUNERAL GUESTS come and leave out. Mateo and Marisol, dressed in black, both sad as they leave from paying respects to Ricky.
MARISOL
You’re gonna be okay?
MATEO
He was like a brother to me.
MARISOL
Poor Aylin. I couldn’t imagine what she’s going through. I’d be sick if something were to happen to you.
Mateo stares at Marisol as Glorivette approaches them —
GLORIVETTE
Mateo?
Mateo shoots a startled look at Glorivette.
MATEO
Glorivette… hi. Coming to pay your respects? We were just leaving?
GLORIVETTE
<font face=”inherit”>I just met Ricky, but he was nice to me when I first started. Wanted to show support for his family. Is this your </font>fiancé<font face=”inherit”>?</font>
<font face=”inherit”>Glorivette shakes Marisol’s hand –</font>
<font face=”inherit”>MARISOL </font>
<font face=”inherit”>Yes, I am.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>Awkward. Mateo’s stuck between a rock and a hard place.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>MATEO</font>
<font face=”inherit”>How rude of me. Glorivette, my </font>fiancé<font face=”inherit”> Marisol. Mari, my co-worker, Glorivette.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>GLORIVETTE (to Marisol)</font>
<font face=”inherit”>Eres muy hermosa.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>MARISOL (flattered)</font>
<font face=”inherit”>Ay, gracias. So are you.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>GLORIVETTE</font>
<font face=”inherit”>You’re too kind. What I’d do to be 20 years younger.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>MARISOL</font>
<font face=”inherit”>No! You look… young! You can hook any man.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>GLORIVETTE (raises eyebrows)</font>
<font face=”inherit”>So I’ve been told.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>Mateo flares his nostrils.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>MATEO</font>
<font face=”inherit”>Mari, baby… I’m ready to go home.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>MARISOL</font>
<font face=”inherit”>Orale.</font>
<font face=”inherit”>Glorivette smirks.</font>
GLORIVETTE
Nice meeting you, Marisol. You two have a safe ride home. I’ll see you back the office, Mateo.
MATEO
Yeah… Have yourself a good night.
MARISOL(to Glorivette)
Good night.
Mateo locks arms with Marisol as they walk away.
Glorivette waves slowly with a sadistic grin on her face.
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Stafford’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned from this assignment was to keep moving; no matter what. Continue to fill the blanks, and the story will flow onto the page.
- Beginning – Mateo prepares to leave work in the parking garage.
- Middle – Glorivette confronts Mateo; wondering why he’s been avoiding her.
- End – Mateo tells Glorivette it’s over between them; Glorivette threatens Mateo.
INT. PARKING GARAGE – EVENING
Mateo walks with his workbag. Looks exhausted from a long work day.
He makes it to his car. Unlocks the doors with his keys. Whips his bag into the backseat. When Mateo closes the door…
Glorivette stands a few feet away; startles Mateo —
MATEO
Whoa! Glorivette…
GLORIVETTE
Scared you?
Beat. They have an intense stare-down.
MATEO
I was headed home… What’s up?
GLORIVETTE
Should be asking you that question.
MATEO
Excuse me?
GLORIVETTE
Why have you been ignoring me? You don’t respond to my calls. And treating me like the ugly girl at the dance since we’ve been back at work.
MATEO
You know I’m in a relationship, Glorivette– Where do you get off acting so surprised?
GLORIVETTE
Wasn’t saying that with your lips on my cono, cabron.
MATEO
Hey, hey. Is that all? I’ll be on my way home now.
GLORIVETTE
Hijo de puta! You think it’s okay to treat women like toys?
MATEO
Look, I’m sorry. Okay? But I’m engaged to be married. Last weekend was– a, I don’t know. Shouldn’t have happened, all right?
GLORIVETTE
You can shove your sorries.
MATEO
Glorivette, it’s over! Okay, it’s over. I’m taken, and there’s plenty of guys who’ll have you. Just not me. Maybe in another life or I were single. Leave last weekend in the past.
GLORIVETTE (SUBTITLES) (in Spanish)
Stupid little boy(in English)You clearly don’t know who you’re fucking with.
MATEO (points)
You stay the fuck away from me. I never wanna see you again.
Mateo gets into his car. Starts the engine — reverses and SPEEDS out of the lot.
Glorivette watches Mateo drive off with hatred in her eyes.
- Beginning – Mateo walks into the apartment; Marisol looks displeased.
- Middle – Marisol confronts Miguel about Glorivette; Mateo confesses his affair.
- End – Marisol kicks Mateo out.
INT. APARTMENT – EVENING<div>
Marisol sits on a the couch in a devastating state as she stares at the wall.
Mateo walks in —
MATEO(giddy)
Marisol! I’m home.(kisses Marisol’s cheek)What’s for dinner, mi amor?
Marisol moves away from Mateo. Face frowned.
MATEO
Mari, que paso?
Marisol sniffs. Wipes nose.
MARISOL
Did you cheat on me, Teo?
MATEO
Huh? Where’d that come from?
MARISOL
Answer my question. Did you? That puta… from Ricky’s funeral. The one you “work” with… You’ve been fucking her, Teo?!
MATEO
What did she tell you?
MARISOL
Everything you didn’t… puto tramposo.
MATEO
Mari, le-let me explain. Please.
MARISOL
Why should I?! You’re a pinche liar– a cheat.
Mateo tries to hug Marisol. She SLAPS his hands away —
MARISOL
Don’t-don’t put your filthy hands on me, you pig! I turn my back to deal with family, and you screw the next bitch. Fuck you! Fuck you, Mateo! I’m not marrying you!
MATEO
Mar–
MARISOL
You need to go… now. I don’t want you here. I don’t want to sleep in the same bed as you. Get out.
Mateo’s soul is crushed. Sees there’s no getting through to Marisol.
MATEO
I’ll go pack my things.
Mateo foots to the bed room. Glorivette’s face rains with sorrow.
</div>
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Stafford’s Act 2 Reaction to TP 1
What I learned from this assignment was bridging the gaps for every event that takes place in my story. I’m shocked at how fast this story is coming together. These exercises are fun, and helping me get it all out rather quickly.
- Beginning – Mateo plays the video game at Ricky’s house.
- Middle – Mateo reveals to Ricky he slept with Glorivette.
- End – Mateo decides if he should tell Marisol.
INT. RICKY’S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Mateo and Ricky play the X-box as they sit on the couch —
MATEO
Appreciate you letting me come over on such short notice, Ricky. Hope I’m not imposing.
RICKY
It’s all good, dawg. Aylin’s working a double, I could use the company. Usually play “Call of Duty” online. So what brings you by?
Beat. Mateo pauses the game; sets the remote down.
MATEO
I-I fucked Glorivette.
RICKY
Que?! Huh?
MATEO
I slept with Glorivette.
RICKY
You said you weren’t going to pursue her, pendejo. What the fuck, Teo?
MATEO
Ah, I know, man! I know, I know! I already feel like shit about the situation.
RICKY (O.S.)
How long?!
MATEO
Happened after the party. I gave her ride home, one thing lead to another… Then again the next day.
Mateo sighs.
RICKY
Well I hope it was worth it, cabron. You fucked up. When is Mari due back in town, are you gonna tell her?
MATEO
I haven’t thought it. Trying to process how to tell her the truth. I don’t know how the fuck I let this happen, bro!(slaps himself)I’m so fucking stupid!
RICKY
Yo, man, chill. Shit happens.
MATEO
Shit don’t just happen! I betrayed Mari’s trust! Her heart is gonna shatter when she finds out.
RICKY
Don’t beat your up, Teo. I mean — you’re a man… it’s in our nature.
MATEO
Have you?
RICKY
Me?! Cheat on Aylin? Hell, no, dawg. She’d kill me. Now, have I thought about? Of course. But I think about how it’ll ruin what I built with my wife. It ain’t worth it.
MATEO
I have man up and tell Mari. Can’t go into a marriage with lies.
RICKY
You’re gonna keep screwing Glorivette?
MATEO
What? No! It’s out of my system, dawg.
RICKY
How do you plan to continue to work around her?
Long beat.
MATEO
I’ll just have to avoid her.
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Stafford’s Finished First Act
What I learned from this assignment is how to stop being a damn “perfectionist.” Just get it all out and revise later. A script will take forever to write if we don’t get out of our heads. This is fast-paced, but it’s definitely get the creative juices flowing.
INT. UNIVERSITY AUDITORIUM – NIGHT
PEOPLE scattered throughout. A graduation ceremony has come to a close. Guest and graduates mingle. Some exit, others take pictures.
FLASH-FLASH-FLASH — MATEO VARGAS, 24. Husky. Wears glasses. All smiles in his cap and gown as he stands next to — MARISOL HERRERA, 24, and his FAMILY MEMBERS (Father, Mother, and brother.) They pose for the camera.
SCOTT, 23. White. In his gown as he wraps up taking pictures of Mateo’s family.
SCOTT
Nice pic, guys!
Scott hands the camera to Mateo —
MATEO
Thanks, Scott.
The two embrace in a hug.
SCOTT
No worries, man. Congratulations.
MATEO
Same to you. We had some awesome times.
SCOTT
Gonna miss you as my roommate.
MATEO
We’ll definitely keep in touch.
MATEO’S FATHER
I’ll get the car.
Mateo’s father and brother make their exit.
MATEO’S MOTHER
Teo, hurry. We have reservations…
MATEO
Okay, Ma.
SCOTT
Dude, enjoy your family. Don’t forget– party at Austin’s next Saturday.
MATEO
Wouldn’t miss it for the world. See you then.
Scott wanders off.
Marisol approaches Scott. Wraps her arm around him —
MARISOL
Congratulations, handsome. I’m so proud of you, Teo. Time to celebrate, eh?
MATEO
Your support means everything. Couldn’t imagine any of this without you.
Mateo pulls Marisol closer. They kiss.
MARISOL
You pulled it off by yourself. Your hard work, dedication… Won’t go unnoticed in the future. You’re lucky for what life has in stored for you.
MATEO
Yeah? Maybe I should add a touch of spice to that luck…
Mateo gets on one knee —
MARISOL (surprised)
Wait–What-what are you doing?! Teo, stop kiddin’ around!
ENGAGEMENT RING
2 carats. Sparkles in a black box as Mateo holds it up Marisol.
MATEO
What do you say? Will you marry me, Mari? Be my good luck forever?
Marisol’s eyes fill with water.
MARISOL (eager)
Yes! Yes, yes! I will!
MATEO
Yeah?!
Mateo slides the ring onto Marisol’s left finger as he stands to his feet. He and Marisol hug and kiss. Everyone APPLAUDS them.
MATEO (CONT’D)
I love you so much.
EXT. ACEVEDA LOGISTICS – DAY
4-story corporate building with a warehouse connected to it.
SUPERIMPOSE: 2 YEARS LATER
INT. ACEVEDA LOGISTICS – CONFIG DEPARTMENT – DAY
Mateo, in a cubicle, now bearded. Wears a casual polo and khakis as he types away at his computer in a focused manner.
RAY, 37. Walks past, then back-tracks to talk to Mateo —
RAY
Do you ever take a break?
MATEO
Bill Gates never took breaks; look at him now.
Mateo chuckles.
RAY
That’s why they pay us the big bucks, no?
MATEO
Sure we can use more.
RAY
Damn company’s in the green. Hopefully we’ll receive raises in the upcoming quarter.
MATEO
Tell that to Sue and Gayland.
RAY
The rate you’re going, they’ll be throwing a ton of incentives your way.
MATEO
Hm.
INT. EMPLOYEE BREAK ROOM – DAY
Mateo steps inside with his coffee mug. Walks over to the coffee machine.
Mateo puts his focus into preparing his coffee.
GLORIVETTE (O.S.)
The coffee here any good?
Mateo looks to his right…
GLORIVETTE GOMEZ, 42. 5’11. Long black hair. Looks young for her age. So hot it hurts. Any man will kill to have her. You’ll get lost in her eyes.
Mateo looks at Glorivette star truck. Refrains from letting his jaw drop as Glorivette has his full attention.
MATEO
Uh-um… It isn’t Starbucks, but it’ll do. Won’t kill you.
Mateo chuckles.
GLORIVETTE
All I needed to know.
Glorivette grabs a foam cup to prepare her coffee.
Mateo looks away; can’t keep his eyes off Glorivette.
MATEO
You-you new here?
GLORIVETTE
Temp-to-hire for the office. Is it that obvi?
MATEO
My first time seeing you here, that’s all.
GLORIVETTE
My first day. You’re full-time?
MATEO
Yeah… in the config department. I’m Mateo.
Glorivette eyes Mateo down. Likes what she sees.
GLORIVETTE
Mateo…?
MATEO (chuckles)
I’m sorry. Vargas. Mateo Vargas.
GLORIVETTE
Working here long?
MATEO
Little over a year and a half.
GLORIVETTE (deep sigh)
Hm. Good for you. (stirs coffee) Guess I’ll get back to my desk. Enjoy the rest of your day, Mateo.
Glorivette walks away with her coffee.
Mateo thinks to himself for a beat.
MATEO
Wait! I-I didn’t catch your name.
Glorivette stops in her tracks; turns to Mateo —
GLORIVETTE
That’s because I didn’t give it to you.
Embarrassed. Mateo twirls his tongue around his mouth. Lost for words.
MATEO
Well, pardon me.
Glorivette smirks.
GLORIVETTE
I’m joking.
Beat.
MATEO (nods)
You got me, huh?
They laugh.
GLORIVETTE
You’ll find it out soon enough… bye.
Glorivette leaves.
Mateo lets out a sigh of relief —
MATEO (SUBTITLES) (in Spanish)
Fuck… She’s beautiful.
Mateo shakes his head.
INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT
Not a fancy environment. Has a “Chili’s vibe to it. Music plays in the background.
Mateo and Marisol sit on one side of the booth. On the other — RICKY SANCHEZ, 32. Mustache. Tattoos. Next to him, AYLIN SANCHEZ, 31. They enjoy tequila shots with laughter, and a keg of beer on the table.
MATEO
We have to stop drinking; we got work in the morning.
AYLIN
Teo’s right, we’re behaving irresponsibly.
RICKY
Ay, you guys are just lame. Bunch of old folks.
Marisol laughs.
MARISOL
It’s getting late and I have to use the bathroom.
AYLIN
Ay, Mari, I’ll come with… Let me out, Ricky.
RICKY
Come on, I’m too drunk to move.
AYLIN
Vamos!
RICKY
Alright!
Ricky slides out the booth to free Aylin —
AYLIN
The two of you behave while we’re gone.
RICKY
I’m always on my best behavior, babe.
MARISOL (to Mateo)
That goes for you, too.
MATEO (points to Ricky)
What he said. Ha ha.
MARISOL
You better. Come on, Aylin.
Marisol and Aylin depart from the table.
RICKY
What, you don’t believe us?
Ricky chuckles.
RICKY
They’re crazy, aren’t they, Teo?
Meteo chuckles as he sips his beer.
MATEO
They’re gone?(off his nod)Dude, have you seen the new temp? She’s fine as fuck, man! Ay!(pounds tables)It was so hard to keep my pelotas in tact.
They laugh.
RICKY
She’s that hot, eh? I heard a few of the guys talking about her. Didn’t get myself a look.
MATEO
Does she have a name? I met her on break earlier– she wouldn’t tell me.
RICKY
Uh… it start’s with a “G” or somethin’. Not sure. I can’t act too interested; I’m married. And you’re damn near married.
MATEO
I know, I know. But you had to see her bro. It’s, like, we had a connection when we met. I haven’t stopped thinking about her since.
RICKY
Well, you better jerk-off if you know what’s good for you. You got a great thing going with Mari, don’t fuck it up. It’s best to leave the “unknown” not knowing, Teo.
MATEO
I’m not gonna screw up things with Mari. It’s just… A woman like that… will make any man curious, ya know?
Beat. Mateo sips his beer.
INT. OFFICE – DAY
GAYLAND ORTON, 50s. Crisp suit. Sits at his mahogany wood desk.
Mateo stands at his office door.
MATEO (taps door)
Mr. Orton? Sue Manning said you wanted to see me?
GAYLAND (clears throat)
Yes. Come in, have a seat.
Mateo steps inside the office. Sits on the opposite end of Gayland’s desk.
MATEO
I do something wrong, sir?
GAYLAND
No, not at all. Complete opposite. Um… you like working for the company, Mateo?
MATEO
As a matter of fact, I do. It’s an amazing company, with a lot of potential for growth.
GAYLAND
That’s good to hear. And if you keep up the good work, you’re gonna go very far with us.
MATEO
Thank you, sir, that’s very encouraging.
GAYLAND
Sue Manning has been reporting to me the amazing job you’ve been doing– The way you handled Verizon and Laboy project was astounding.
MATEO
I’ve been limiting the amount of fun in my life to get my work done, sir.
They laugh.
GAYLAND
Very well! Spoke with the board, and you’ve nominated to receive the “Rising Star” Award at the company party.
MATEO
Uh, wo-wow! I don’t know exactly what to say!
Mateo laughs.
GAYLAND
You deserve it. Keep up the good work. We have big plans and changes coming your way.
Gayland extends his arm to shake Mateo’s hand. Mateo shakes with a giddy smile on his face.
INT. APARTMENT – LIVING ROOM – EVENING
Marisol sit on the couch. Watches TV with a bowl of popcorn and glass of wine.
Mateo walks in. Sets his work bag down with an excited look on his face.
MARISOL
Teo, you’re just in time babe. The “Friends” reunion airs tonight.
Mateo sits on the couch —
MATEO
Oh, nice! Babe, you won’t believe what happened today at work.
Marisol sets the popcorn and wine of the coffee table —
MARISOL (interested)
What? What?
MATEO
I’ve been nominated for an award at my job.
MARISOL
Really?! That’s awesome, Teo! Congratulations!
MATEO
Right! My hard work is finally starting to pay off! They’ll announce it at the company party this weekend.
MARISOL
I have to figure out what I’m wearing! And my hair! I have to look nice for you, baby!
MATEO (kisses Marisol)
Don’t be silly, honey, you’re always beautiful.
MARISOL
You’re so sweet, but I have to look nice for you that night.
MATEO
Start the show while I go get a beer.(stands to his feet)Wooo! Fuck, yeah, man!
Mateo goes into the kitchen. Grabs a beer from the refrigerator.
MARISOL (O.S.)
I’m so happy for you! Wait my father’s calling.
Marisol answers her phone —
MARISOL (CONT’D)
Hey, Papi!(then)Oh, my God, what’s wrong?
Mateo sips his beer. Notices Marisol’s mood switch.
MARISOL (CONT’D)
No… Are you serious? Okay, calm down. I’ll be on the next train tomorrow, sit tight.(then)I’m so sorry, Papi. I’ll be there. Love you, bye-bye.
Marisol hangs up. Places hand over her mouth.
MATEO
What was that about? Everything okay?
MARISOL
My Aunt Bartola passed away.
MATEO
Shit, Mari. I’m sorry to hear that, baby.
Marisol fans her tears away.
MARISOL
My father is heading to Indiana from Wisconsin. I told him I’ll meet everyone there.(thinks to herself)Shit! Your job’s party! Fuck! Teo…
Mateo sits to console Marisol —
MATEO
Baby, it’s okay, go. Your family needs you. Maybe I should tell Gayland to give the award to someone else–
MARISOL
No!
MATEO
You need me there for support. Fuck that party–
Marisol holds Mateo’s face.
MARISOL
You’ve worked your ass off. You’re going to that party. I’ll be fine.(kisses Mateo)Stay. We’ll celebrate when I get back.
Mateo nods…
INT. MATEO’S CAR – NIGHT (MOVING)
Mateo drives with Glorivette in the passenger seat.
GLORIVETTE
I appreciate you giving me a lift. You didn’t have to.
MATEO
Not a problem. I, uh, didn’t have anywhere to be tonight, so…
GLORIVETTE
Got it.
Few beats. Silence in the car.
MATEO
How ’bout some music, huh?
Mateo turns on the his radio —
GLORIVETTE
Go for it.
Rap music begins to play. Mateo nods his head as he cruises.
GLORIVETTE (CONT’D)
You listen to rap music, huh?
MATEO
You mind?
GLORIVETTE
No… not at all. Can’t say I’m surprised.
MATEO (shrugs)
What I can I say? When you’ve been raised around Mexican music all your life, you grow tired of it.
GLORIVETTE
I agree. You’re not alone, and I’m almost twice your age.
Mateo quick glances at Glorivette in disbelief —
MATEO
Shut up. How old are you? I mean, I know you’re not supposed to ask a woman her age, but… Twice my age? No!
GLORIVETTE
Yeah, I’m 42, believe it or not.
MATEO
Get the fuck…
GLORIVETTE
Seriously.
MATEO
You look damn for your age, Glorivette. Like, seriously. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying “42” is old… but you look damn good.
GLORIVETTE (flattered)
Thanks for the compliment.
MATEO
I’m not shittin’ you! Like, you look better than most girls my age.
GLORIVETTE
You’re full of it.
MATEO
No, I’m not. All truth. What’s your secret?
GLORIVETTE (chuckles)
A lot of fruit and agua, I don’t know…
Glorivette giggles.
MATEO
You need to tell me the fountain of youth you’re getting your water from, eh?
They laugh.
GLORIVETTE
Why are you so funny, Mateo?
Beat.
MATEO
So where’re you’re from?
GLORIVETTE
Originally from Mexico. I left and relocated to New York for school. Then I was forced to moved because of an abusive relationship.
MATEO
Good thing you got out when you did.
GLORIVETTE
I’d rather not talk about it, okay?
MATEO
Of course. My apologies.
GLORIVETTE
It’s fine. Just hard to discuss, you know?
MATEO
You don’t have to explain; I understand.
Glorivette sniffs and nods.
MATEO (CONT’D)
How far we got?
GLORIVETTE
This is the street. That building there.
Mateo pulls in front of an apartment; puts the car in park.
MATEO
So… here we are.
GLORIVETTE
You wanna come in? For a drink.
Beat. Mateo isn’t sure how to respond.
MATEO
Uh… nah, I should get home.
GLORIVETTE
Just a drink for the road. Come on, it’ll be quick. It’s the least I can do.
Mateo thinks on it.
MATEO
Ah, one drink won’t hurt, huh?
Glorivette smiles.
INT. GLORIVETTE’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Mateo sits on the couch. His phone VIBRATES. He looks at his phone —
MATEO
Shit!
PHONE SCREEN
Marisol’s calling.
Mateo ignores the call.
GLORIVETTE (O.S.)
You OK?
MATEO
Uh, yeah…
Mateo’s phone vibrates again —
MATEO
Fu…(answers phone)Marisol? Mari, what’s up, baby? Everything okay?
MARISOL (V.O.)
Yeah. Teo, you’re sleep?
MATEO
No. No. I am really tired, though. How was the service? Your familia hanging in there?
MARISOL (V.O.)
We’ll get through, baby. How was the party? I feel like shit for missing you accept your award–
MATEO
It’s fine, baby. It’s fine. Family first. I know you would’ve been here otherwise.
MARISOL (V.O.)
As long as you know. I love you, Teo.
MATEO
I know(fake yawns)Baby, it’s been a long day, and I just want to get some shut eye.
MARISOL (V.O.)
Oh… okay, babe, get you some rest. I’ll keep you posted on when I’ll be home.
MATEO
Sounds good. Give everyone my love.
MARISOL (V.O.)
I will. I love you, and congrats on your award.
MATEO
Love you too, baby. Bye.
Mateo hangs up.
Glorivette wears a night gown with lingerie hidden underneath. A bottle of tequila and shot glasses in her hands.
Mateo gulps. In awe at Glorivette’s attire as she joins him on the couch —
GLORIVETTE
Thought I’d slip into something more comfortable before I went to sleep.
MATEO (clears throat)
Uh, someone is gonna sleep well tonight. Comfortable, I see.
Glorivette giggles. Pours she and Mateo a shot each.
GLORIVETTE (raises glass)
One drink.
Mateo raises his glass —
MATEO
Salud.
They down their drinks. Set their glasses on the table.
MATEO (CONT’D)
Ahh… Wooo! Guess I should hit the road. Good-night.
GLORIVETTE
Why do you always give me that look, Mateo?
Beat.
MATEO
What-what look?
GLORIVETTE
Like you wanna fuck me.
Mateo’s eyes widened.
GLORIVETTE (CONT’D)
Do you wanna fuck me, Mateo?
Glorivette gives Mateo a seductive stare.
Mateo, gawks at Glorivette like a piece of meat.
They begin to aggressively kiss each other. Mateo lies Glorivette on her back.
Mateo and Glorivette have sex on the couch.
-
Stafford’s Turning Point 1 Scenes
What I learned from this assignment was how attack key scenes to keep my creative juices flowing. The more I tap into said scenes, the better I’ll be able to plug in scenes later.
Act 1 Turning Point Scenes
- Beginning – Mateo gives Glorivette a ride home.
- Middle – During the ride home, they get to know each other better.
- End – Glorivette invites Mateo into her apartment.
INT. MATEO’S CAR – NIGHT (MOVING)<div>
Mateo drives with Glorivette in the passenger seat.
GLORIVETTE
I appreciate you giving me a lift. You didn’t have to.
MATEO
Not a problem. I, uh, didn’t have anywhere to be tonight, so…
GLORIVETTE
Got it.
Few beats. Silence in the car.
MATEO
How ’bout some music, huh?
Mateo turns on the his radio —
GLORIVETTE
Go for it.
Rap music begins to play. Mateo nods his head as he cruises.
GLORIVETTE (CONT’D)
You listen to rap, huh?
MATEO
You mind?
GLORIVETTE
No… not at all. Can’t say I’m surprised.
MATEO (shrugs)
What I can I say? When you’ve been raised around Mexican music all your life, you grow tired of it.
GLORIVETTE
I agree. You’re not alone, and I’m almost twice your age.
Mateo quick glances at Glorivette in disbelief —
MATEO
Shut up. How old are you? I mean, I know you’re not supposed to ask a woman her age, but… Twice my age? No!
GLORIVETTE
Yeah, I’m 42, believe it or not.
MATEO
Get the fuck…
GLORIVETTE
Seriously.
MATEO
You look damn for your age, Glorivette. Like, seriously. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying “42” is old… but you look damn good.
GLORIVETTE (flattered)
Thanks for the compliment.
MATEO
I’m not shittin’ you! Like, you look better than most girls my age.
GLORIVETTE
You’re full of it.
MATEO
No, I’m not. All truth. What’s your secret?
GLORIVETTE (chuckles)
A lot of fruit and agua, I don’t know…
Glorivette giggles.
MATEO
You need to tell me the fountain of youth you’re getting your water from, eh?
They laugh.
GLORIVETTE
Why are you so funny, Mateo?
Beat.
MATEO
So where’re you’re from?
GLORIVETTE
Originally from Mexico. I left and relocated to New York for school. Then I was forced to moved because of an abusive relationship.
MATEO
Good thing you got out when you did.
GLORIVETTE
I’d rather not talk about it, okay?
MATEO
Of course. My apologies.
GLORIVETTE
It’s fine. Just hard to discuss, you know?
MATEO
You don’t have to explain; I understand.
Glorivette sniffs and nods.
MATEO (CONT’D)
How far we got?
GLORIVETTE
This is the street. That building there.
Mateo pulls in front of an apartment; puts the car in park.
MATEO
So… here we are.
GLORIVETTE
You wanna come in? For a drink.
Beat. Mateo isn’t sure how to respond.
MATEO
Uh… nah, I should get home.
GLORIVETTE
Just a drink for the road. Come on, it’ll be quick. It’s the least I can do.
Mateo thinks on it.
MATEO
Ah, one drink won’t hurt, huh?
Glorivette smiles.
- Beginning – Mateo sits on Glorivettes couch. Marisol calls; Mateo rushes off the phone.
- Middle – Mateo and Glorivette have a drink.
- End – Glorivette seduces Mateo; they have sex.
INT. GLORIVETTE’S APARTMENT – NIGHT</div><div>
Mateo sits on the couch. His phone VIBRATES. He looks at his phone —
MATEO
Shit!
PHONE SCREEN
Marisol’s calling.
Mateo ignores the call.
GLORIVETTE (O.S.)
You OK?
MATEO
Uh, yeah…
Mateo’s phone vibrates again —
MATEO
Fu…(answers phone)Marisol? Mari, what’s up, baby? Everything okay?
MARISOL (V.O.)
Yeah. Teo, you’re sleep?
MATEO
No. No. I am really tired, though. How was the service? Your familia hanging in there?
MARISOL (V.O.)
We’ll get through, baby. How was the party? I feel like shit for missing you accept your award–
MATEO
It’s fine, baby. It’s fine. Family first. I know you would’ve been here otherwise.
MARISOL (V.O.)
As long as you know. I love you, Teo.
MATEO
I know(fake yawns)Baby, it’s been a long day, and I just want to get some shut eye.
MARISOL (V.O.)
Oh… okay, babe, get you some rest. I’ll keep you posted on when I’ll be home.
MATEO
Sounds good. Give everyone my love.
MARISOL (V.O.)
I will. I love you, and congrats on your award.
MATEO
Love you too, baby. Bye.
Mateo hangs up.
Glorivette wears a night gown with lingerie hidden underneath. A bottle of tequila and shot glasses in her hands.
Mateo gulps. In awe at Glorivette’s attire as she joins him on the couch —
GLORIVETTE
Thought I’d slip into something more comfortable before I went to sleep.
MATEO (clears throat)
Uh, someone is gonna sleep well tonight. Comfortable, I see.
Glorivette giggles. Pours she and Mateo a shot each.
GLORIVETTE (raises glass)
One drink.
Mateo raises his glass —
MATEO
Salud.
They down their drinks. Set their glasses on the table.
MATEO (CONT’D)
Ahh… Wooo! Guess I should hit the road. Good-night.
GLORIVETTE
Why do you always give me that look, Mateo?
Beat.
MATEO
What-what look?
GLORIVETTE
Like you wanna fuck me.
Mateo’s eyes widened.
GLORIVETTE (CONT’D)
Do you wanna fuck me, Mateo?
Glorivette gives Mateo a seductive stare.
Mateo, gawks at Glorivette like a piece of meat.
They begin to aggressively kiss each other. Mateo lies Glorivette on her back.
Mateo and Glorivette have sex on the couch.
</div>
-
Stafford’s Inciting Incident
What I learned from this assignment and previous courses, is that your “inciting incident” should occur very early in the script. At least in the first 15 pages, perhaps earlier. It’s an attention-getter that’ll get the wheels of the story in motion.
Inciting Incident Outline
- Beginning – Mateo walks into the break room to get coffee.
- Middle – Mateo meets Glorivette; there’s an attraction between the two.
- End – Glorivette leaves the break room without giving Mateo her name.
INT. EMPLOYEE BREAK ROOM – DAY
Mateo steps inside with his coffee mug. Walks over to the coffee machine.
Mateo puts his focus into preparing his coffee.
GLORIVETTE (O.S.)
The coffee here any good?
Mateo looks to his right…
GLORIVETTE GOMEZ, 42. 5’11. Long black hair. Looks young for her age. So hot it hurts. Any man will kill to have her. You’ll get lost in her eyes.
Mateo looks at Glorivette star truck. Refrains from letting his jaw drop as Glorivette has his full attention.
MATEO
Uh-um… It isn’t Starbucks, but it’ll do. Won’t kill you.
Mateo chuckles.
GLORIVETTE
All I needed to know.
Glorivette grabs a foam cup to prepare her coffee.
Mateo looks away; can’t keep his eyes off Glorivette.
MATEO
You-you new here?
GLORIVETTE
Temp-to-hire for the office. Is it that obvi?
MATEO
My first time seeing you here, that’s all.
GLORIVETTE
My first day. You’re full-time?
MATEO
Yeah… in the config department. I’m Mateo.
Glorivette eyes Mateo down. Likes what she sees.
GLORIVETTE
Mateo…?
MATEO (chuckles)
I’m sorry. Vargas. Mateo Vargas.
GLORIVETTE
Working here long?
MATEO
Little over a year and a half.
GLORIVETTE (deep sigh)
Hm. Good for you. (stirs coffee) Guess I’ll get back to my desk. Enjoy the rest of your day, Mateo.
Glorivette walks away with her coffee.
Mateo thinks to himself for a beat.
MATEO
Wait! I-I didn’t catch your name.
Glorivette stops in her tracks; turns to Mateo —
GLORIVETTE
That’s because I didn’t give it to you.
Embarrassed. Mateo twirls his tongue around his mouth. Lost for words.
MATEO
Well, pardon me.
Glorivette smirks.
GLORIVETTE
I’m joking.
Beat.
MATEO (nods)
You got me, huh?
They laugh.
GLORIVETTE
You’ll find it out soon enough… bye
Glorivette leaves.
Mateo lets out a sigh of relief —
MATEO (SUBTITLES) (in Spanish)
Fuck… She’s beautiful.
Mateo shakes his head.
Reaction Scene Outline
- Beginning – Mateo and Marisol are out on a double-date with Ricky and Aylin.
- Middle – The women go off to the bathroom while the men discuss Glorivette.
- End – Mateo is curious to know more about Glorivette.
INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT
Not a fancy environment. Has a “Chili’s vibe to it. Music plays in the background.
Mateo and Marisol sit on one side of the booth. On the other — RICKY SANCHEZ, 32. Mustache. Tattoos. Next to him, AYLIN SANCHEZ, 31. They enjoy tequila shots with laughter, and a keg of beer on the table.
MATEO
We have to stop drinking; we got work in the morning.
AYLIN
Teo’s right, we’re behaving irresponsibly.
RICKY
Ay, you guys are just lame. Bunch of old folks.
Marisol laughs.
MARISOL
It’s getting late and I have to use the bathroom.
AYLIN
Ay, Mari, I’ll come with… Let me out, Ricky.
RICKY
Come on, I’m too drunk to move.
AYLIN
Vamos!
RICKY
Alright!
Ricky slides out the booth to free Aylin —
AYLIN
The two of you behave while we’re gone.
RICKY
I’m always on my best behavior, babe.
MARISOL (to Mateo)
That goes for you, too.
MATEO (points to Ricky)
What he said. Ha ha.
MARISOL
You better. Come on, Aylin.
Marisol and Aylin depart from the table.
RICKY
What, you don’t believe us?
Ricky chuckles.
RICKY
They’re crazy, aren’t they, Teo?
Meteo chuckles as his sips his beer.
MATEO
They’re gone?(off his nod)Dude, have you seen the new temp? She’s fine as fuck, man! Ay!(pounds tables)It was so hard to keep my pelotas in tact.
They laugh.
RICKY
She’s that hot, eh? I heard a few of the guys talking about her. Didn’t get myself a look.
MATEO
Does she have a name? I met her on break earlier– she wouldn’t tell me.
RICKY
Uh… it start’s with a “G” or somethin’. Not sure. I can’t act too interested; I’m married. And you’re damn near married.
MATEO
I know, I know. But you had to see her bro. It’s, like, we had a connection when we met. I haven’t stopped thinking about her since.
RICKY
Well, you better jerk-off if you know what’s good for you. You got a great thing going with Mari, don’t fuck it up. It’s best to leave the “unknown” not knowing, Teo.
MATEO
I’m not gonna screw up things with Mari. It’s just… A woman like that… will make any man curious, ya know?
Beat. Mateo sips his beer.
-
Stafford’s Act One: Opening Scenes
What I learned from this assignment was giving my leads opening scenes that are interesting enough to grasp my audience’s attention. It doesn’t have to be the most dramatic entrance, but have some significance to the role they will play in the story.
Mateo’s Opening Scene
INT. UNIVERSITY AUDITORIUM – NIGHT
PEOPLE scattered throughout. A graduation ceremony has come to a close. Guest and graduates mingle. Some exit, others take pictures.
FLASH-FLASH-FLASH — MATEO VARGAS, 24. Husky. Wears glasses. All smiles in his cap and gown as he stands next to — MARISOL HERRERA, 24, and his FAMILY MEMBERS (Father, Mother, and brother.) They pose for the camera.
SCOTT, 23. White. In his gown as he wraps up taking pictures of Mateo’s family.
SCOTT
Nice pic, guys!
Scott hands the camera to Mateo —
MATEO
Thanks, Scott.
The two embrace in a hug.
SCOTT
No worries, man. Congratulations.
MATEO
Same to you. We had some awesome times.
SCOTT
Gonna miss you as my roommate.
MATEO
We’ll definitely keep in touch.
MATEO’S FATHER
I’ll get the car.
Mateo’s father and brother make their exit.
MATEO’S MOTHER
Teo, hurry. We have reservations…
MATEO
Okay, Ma.
SCOTT
Dude, enjoy your family. Don’t forget– party at Austin’s next Saturday.
MATEO
Wouldn’t miss it for the world. See you then.
Scott wanders off.
Marisol approaches Scott. Wraps her arm around him —
MARISOL
Congratulations, handsome. I’m so proud of you, Teo. Time to celebrate, eh?
MATEO
Your support means everything. Couldn’t imagine any of this without you.
Mateo pulls Marisol closer. They kiss.
MARISOL
You pulled it off by yourself. Your hard work, dedication… Won’t go unnoticed in the future. You’re lucky for what life has in stored for you.
MATEO
Yeah? Maybe I should add a touch of spice to that luck…
Mateo gets on one knee —
MARISOL (surprised)
Wait–What-what are you doing?! Teo, stop kiddin’ around!
ENGAGEMENT RING
2 carats. Sparkles in a black box as Mateo holds it up Marisol.
MATEO
What do you say? Will you marry me, Mari? Be my good luck forever?
Marisol’s eyes fill with water.
MARISOL (eager)
Yes! Yes, yes! I will!
MATEO
Yeah?!
Mateo slides the ring onto Marisol’s left finger as he stands to his feet. He and Marisol hug and kiss. Everyone APPLAUDS them.
MATEO (CONT’D)
I love you so much.
Glorivette’s Opening Scene
INT. EMPLOYEE BREAK ROOM – DAY
Mateo steps inside with his coffee mug. Walks over to the coffee machine.
Mateo puts his focus into preparing his coffee.
GLORIVETTE (O.S.)
The coffee here any good?
Mateo looks to his right…
GLORIVETTE GOMEZ, 42. 5’11. Long black hair. Looks young for her age. So hot it hurts. Any man will kill to have her. You’ll get lost in her eyes.
Mateo looks at Glorivette star truck. Refrains from letting his jaw drop as Glorivette has his full attention.
MATEO
Uh-um… It isn’t Starbucks, but it’ll do. Won’t kill you.
Mateo chuckles.
GLORIVETTE
All I needed to know.
Glorivette grabs a foam cup to prepare her coffee.
Mateo looks away; can’t keep his eyes off Glorivette.
MATEO
You-you new here?
GLORIVETTE
Temp-to-hire for the office. Is it that obvi?
MATEO
My first time seeing you here, that’s all.
GLORIVETTE
My first day. You’re full-time?
MATEO
Yeah… in the config department. I’m Mateo.
Glorivette eyes Mateo down. Likes what she sees.
GLORIVETTE
Mateo…?
MATEO (chuckles)
I’m sorry. Vargas. Mateo Vargas.
GLORIVETTE
Working here long?
MATEO
Little over a year and a half.
GLORIVETTE (deep sigh)
Hm. Good for you. (stirs coffee) Guess I’ll get back to my desk. Enjoy the rest of your day, Mateo.
Glorivette walks away with her coffee.
Mateo thinks to himself for a beat.
MATEO
Wait! I-I didn’t catch your name.
Glorivette stops in her tracks; turns to Mateo —
GLORIVETTE
That’s because I didn’t give it to you.
Embarrassed. Mateo twirls his tongue around his mouth. Lost for words.
MATEO
Well, pardon me.
Glorivette smirks.
GLORIVETTE
I’m joking.
Beat.
MATEO (nods)
You got me, huh?
They laugh.
GLORIVETTE
You’ll find it out soon enough… bye
Glorivette leaves.
Mateo lets out a sigh of relief —
MATEO (SUBTITLES) (in Spanish)
Fuck… She’s beautiful.
Mateo shakes his head.
-
Stafford’s Beat Sheet Draft 2
What I learned from this assignment was how important my 2nd lead is to my protagonist’s journey. When both worlds collide, they will balance one another. Both have opposite goals, and it will cause friction between the two within the storyline. I’ve always been taught your story is only as good as your villain.
List of main beats from my Antagonist’s story — Glorivette Gomez
– Glorivette meets Mateo Vargas on her first day of work. There’s an instant attraction between the two.
– Glorivette receives a ride home from Mateo after a party, they bond during the drive.
– Glorivette invites Mateo into her apartment. They drink and have sex.
– Glorivette engages into an affair with Mateo.
– When she realizes Mateo avoiding her after their time together, Glorivette threatens Mateo.
– Glorivette kills Ricky.
– Glorivette taunts Mateo while he’s with Marisol at Ricky’s funeral.
– Glorivette kills anyone who gets in her way; regarding her Mateo.
– Glorivette tells Marisol about the affair with Mateo; causing a rift in Mateo’s relationship.
– Glorivette gets into a scuffle with Mateo in his hotel room. Mateo threatens to kill her.
– Glorivette tracks down Mateo and Marisol, and comes close to killing them.
-
Stafford’s High-Speed Beat Sheet
What I learned from this assignment was just to get everything out. It’ll help better the creative process. Get it on paper, and revise as I go. The quicker I visualize scenes, the easier it becomes to puzzle in the remainder of my story.
INT. COLLEGE AUDITORIUM – NIGHT
Mateo Vargas graduates college.
TE 1: He’s about to walk into another chapter of his life.
INT. EMPLOYEE BREAK ROOM – DAY
Inciting Incident: Mateo meets Glorivette Gomez; there’s an instant attraction between the two.
Placeholder: Mateo is in a relationship. How will he respond to the temptation? Will he keep his fiancé in mind? Is Glorivette in control?
INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT
Mateo and Marisol double-date with Ricky and Aylin. When Aylin and Marisol go to the bathroom together, Mateo describes to Ricky how hot Glorivette is.
TE 2: Mateo lusts and curiosity of Glorivette grows. Not a good sign for his relationship.
INT. MATEO’S CAR – NIGHT (MOVING)
Mateo gives Glorivette a ride home after a party. They bond. Glorivette plays on Mateo’s emotions.
Placeholder: What road will this ride home lead to? Mateo’s alone with Glorivette, how will he act on it? Will Glorivette invite him inside of her apartment? Will Mateo go straight home after dropping Glorivette off?
INT. GLORIVETTE’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
While at Glorivette’s, Mateo rushes off the phone with Marisol. Glorivette pours drinks for she and Mateo; they sleep together.
TE 3: Mateo betrays Marisol’s trust. Acts on his temptation; becomes a cheater.
INT. APARTMENT – NIGHT
Mateo prepares to come clean to Marisol; decides not to.
TE 4: Mateo has the opportunity to be honest, and continues to go down the road of deception.
INT. BED ROOM – NIGHT
While in the bed with Marisol, Glorivette calls Mateo. He ignores her calls.
TE 5: Mateo’s been avoiding Glorivette. Slowly tries to cut off all communication with her. Wants to get back on track with Marisol.
INT. PARKING LOT – DAY
Glorivette realizes Mateo trying to break things off; threatens him.
TE 6: Mateo goes from being attracted to Glorivette to being afraid of her.
INT. FUNERAL HOME – DAY
Glorivette approaches Mateo and Marisol at Ricky’s funeral.
Placeholder: Will Mateo lose his cool? Will Glorivette inform Marisol of Mateo’s infidelity? How will Mateo maneuver this awkward predicament he’s in?
INT. APARTMENT – NIGHT
Marisol confronts Mateo after Glorivette contacts her on social media about him sleeping with her. Mateo is forced to admit he cheated; Marisol kicks him out.
Placeholder: Is this the end for Mateo and Marisol’s engagement? Will she ever be able to forgive him?
INT. MOTEL – NIGHT
Glorivette shows up to Mateo’s room unannounced. They get into a huge scuffle; Mateo threatens to kill her.
TE 7: Mateo is no longer easy-going. He’s reached his limit. Has nothing to lose and needs to rid himself of Glorivette before things get worse.
INT. APARTMENT – DAY
Mateo apologizes to Marisol. Promises to be honest and never make stupid decisions in their relationship. They reconcile.
TE 8: Mateo is remorseful. Wants to make things work with Marisol. Got the cheating out of his system; wants a clean slate.
INT. LAKE HOUSE – NIGHT
Climax: Mateo and Marisol have a final battle with Glorivette. Mateo does whatever to defeat Glorivette.
TE 9: Mateo kicks survival mode into high-gear. His morals go out the door.
Placeholder: Will Mateo and Marisol survive? Will Glorivette become victorious? How will this conflict end?
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Stafford’s Transformational Events
What I learned from this assignment was how to formulate a natural journey for my protagonist. Pretty much taking he/she on a roller-coaster with my audience; my beat-sheet/outline is writing itself.
Mateo Vargas
Old Ways
– Jokester
– Nice
– Easy-going
– Sneaking around
– Cheats w/ Glorivette
New Ways
– Cautious
– Serious
– Frustrated
– Survival Mode
– Faithful
1.) Mateo is well-liked around the office; kids with co-workers.
2.) Meets Glorivette, and there’s an instant attraction, but remembers he’s in a relationship.
3.) Jokes around with Ricky about how hot Glorivette is.
4.) Hides his affair from everyone.
5.) Feeling guilty, tries to break things off with Glorivette to save his relationship and job.
6.) Becomes frightened when Glorivette threatens him.
7.) Grows frustrated when he can’t prove any of Glorivette’s wrongdoings.
8.) Forced to come clean with Marisol about the affair after Glorivette exposes him.
9.) Full of rage — threatens to kill Glorivette if she comes near him again.
10.) Works to pick up the pieces with his broken relationship with Glorivette.
11.) Has a final showdown with Glorivette once and for all to save he and Marisol’s life.
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Stafford’s 4 Act Transformational Structure
What I learned from this assignment was how to blueprint and formulate my protagonist’s journey through the 4 Act structure. The more I puzzle the pieces, it makes perfect sense to how they’ll navigate as a character. This was a really fun process.
Concept: After engaging in an adulterous affair with a coworker, Mateo Vargas must take drastic steps to save his relationship and job, when the mistress becomes obsessive and dangerous to everyone’s well-being.
Main Conflict: Mateo feels guilty for cheating on Marisol; he breaks things off with Glorivette. When Glorivette takes no for an answer, she begins to attack everything around Mateo; personally and professionally.
Mateo’s Old Ways: 1.) Witty and easy-going. 2.) Non-confrontational. 3.) Curious and sneaks around to act on his lust for another woman.
Mateo’s New Ways: 1.) On edge/Fearful. 2.) Honest/Faithful. 3.) Has a distaste for Glorivette.
Act 1: 25 to 30 pages
Opening: Mateo Vargas graduates from college. A year later, he’s working for one the biggest tech companies in the nation. At his job, he’s introduced to a temporary employee — Glorivette. He develops a secret crush on her.
Inciting Incident: Mateo acts on his lust, and sleeps with his Glorivette — betraying his fiancé, Marisol.
Turning Point: Feeling guilty, Mateo decides to end things with Glorivette. Glorivette responds with a hostility — sparking a newfound fear within Mateo.
Act 2: 20 to 30 pages
New plan: Mateo wants to rid Glorivette out of his life completely.
Plan in action: He cuts off all and any communication with her. He also avoids Glorivette at work.
Midpoint Turning Point: Glorivette figures out what Mateo’s doing to her; begins to make trouble for him.
Act 3: 20 to 30 pages
Rethink everything: When Mateo realizes Glorivette’s treacherous act, he begins to plot her downfall: getting her fired or arrested.
New plan: Mateo goes to the police to look into Glorivette’s suspicious behavior.
Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift: Glorivette informs Marisol about her affair with Mateo. Marisol confronts Mateo; kicks him out of their apartment. Mateo moves into a motel.
Act 4: 25 pages
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: Mateo and Glorivette reconcile and decide to getaway for a while. Glorivette track them down, tries to kill them both. Together, Mateo and Marisol defeat Glorivette.
Resolution: With Glorivette out of his life for good, Mateo can move on with his life. Learning from his mistakes.
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Stafford’s Character Interviews
What I learned from this assignment was how to get real acquainted with my characters. It is my job as the creator to establish their wants, needs, motivations, fears, etc. Getting to know my lead characters better, will help the story flow smoothly.
Mateo’s Interview
Me: Hi, Mateo. My name’s Stafford, I’ll be interviewing you for the story you’re a potential lead in.
Mateo: Hey, man. Thanks for having me. Happy to be of service.
Me: My pleasure. So, tell me a little about yourself.
Mateo: Uh… Where do I start? Ha. I work for one of the largest tech companies in the country. Computers have been apart of my life since I was in high school. I graduated with a B.A. in software engineering. First in my family to go to college. Hard work is no stranger to me. I love participating in various outings with friends, and I’m engaged to be married to my beautiful fiancé, Marisol. We’ve been together 4 years.
Me: Nice! Impressive… very impressive. Why do you think you were called to this journey? Why you?
Mateo: Well, maybe because you want to show that even the simplest person — can cause a whirlwind in their life by making the most common, stupid mistake most men tend to make. From a different perspective, of course.
Me: You’re absolutely right. I can respect that answer. Next question: You are up against Glorivette Gomez. You’ve seen her, know her plans, and what she’s capable of. What is it about them that makes this journey even more difficult for you?
Mateo: Phew — man, I have my work cut out for me, huh? I mean… For starters, she’s drop-dead gorgeous. I can see why any man could fall prey to her manipulation. I know dealing with her won’t be an easy task. But there’s a reason you’re scouting me to take her own. I may enter a web of deception with her, but I’ll find a way to prevail.
Me: Not a doubt you won’t. And in order to survive or accomplish this, you are going to have to step way outside of your box. What changes do you expect to make and which of them will be the most difficult?
Mateo: I’ll have to resist like no man has before. Fight like hell to keep Glorivette the hell out of my “everyday.” If things get ugly, I’ll have to become in touch with my inner-demon. Fight fire with fire. My life and Marisol’s depend on it. I can live with those odds.
Me: What habits or ways of thinking do you think will be the most difficult to let go of?
Mateo: Not gonna lie to you… Glorivette and I had some wild, spontaneous, mind-blowing sex. Although, it was addicting, I’m willing to let it go to save what’s left of my relationship.
Me: What fears, insecurities and wounds have held you back?
Mateo: I honestly got involved with Glorivette for the thrill. It gave me a rush. I felt different hanging out with her. I was tired of my same day-to-day routine with my life. I needed some type of validation. It made me lose sight of who I was and what really mattered to me.
Me: What skills, background or expertise makes you well-suited to face this conflict or antagonist?
Mateo: I can out-smart her. I-I-I know it. She’ll slip up eventually. And when she does, the police will take her ass to prison for all of her wrong-doings.
Me: What are you hiding from the other characters? What don’t you want them to know?
Mateo: The fact I cheated on Marisol. My superiors and and colleagues — if they knew about my affair with Glorivette… It could detrimental to my career. But I need to come clean with Marisol. I can’t keep living with this guilt. She deserves the truth.
Me: What do you think of Glorivette?
Mateo: She started off sweet, but there’s a dark side — no one should encounter. I regret crossing that bridge with her. Changed my life for the worse.
Me: Tell me your side of this whole conflict / story.
Mateo: How many times you want me to say it? I made a stupid decision, and it’s the reason I have to delete Glorivette out of my existence.
Me: Last question — What does it do for your life is you succeed here?
Mateo: I have to survive this woman. Everyone will die if she wins.
Glorivette’s Interview
Me: Glorivette, heard so much about you! Thanks for taking the time to meet me.
Glorivette: Not a problem.
Me: Mind telling me about yourself?
Glorivette: Sure. You want the truth? Or what I lead everyone on with? I’d rather keep that bit of info to myself. You all will find out in due time.
Me: I think I have an idea of who you really are, Glorivette. Still putting my finger on it. Which brings me to my next question: Having to do with this journey, what are your strengths and weaknesses?
Glorivette: My weaknesses: I always fall for shitty men. My strengths: I’m resourceful. “No” is not acceptable in my world. I control everything around me.
Me: Why are you committed to making the Protagonist fail? Or for a relationship movie, why are you committed to making them change?
Glorivette: His soon-to-be marriage has to end. That bitch has nothing on me! She doesn’t deserve a man like him. And he’s gonna leave her for me or else…
Me: What do you get out of winning this fight / succeeding in your plan / taking down your competition?
Glorivette: The love I so rightfully deserve.
Me: What drives you toward your mission / agenda, even in the face of danger, ruin, or death?
Glorivette: I will and always be a woman who gets what she wants. Nothing and no one will stop me.
Me: What secrets must you keep to succeed? What other secrets do you keep out of fear / insecurity?
Glorivette: My true identity. No one can know who I am. The police will take me away.
Me: Compared to other people like you, what makes you special?
Glorivette: There’s only one me, baby. No one can do what I do like me.
Me: What do you think of Mateo?
Glorivette: Nothing to say. He’s not who he– I’ll rather not discuss him. Next question, please.
<font face=”inherit”>Me: We’re </font>actually<font face=”inherit”> at the end. Can you t</font>ell me your side of this whole conflict / story?
Glorivette: I was stupid enough to believe this man loved me. He toyed with my emotions, and now the bastard must pay for breaking my heart.
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Stafford’s Character Profiles Part 2
What I learned from this assignment was how the more you pour into your characters, the better acquainted they’ll become to my world-building process, and their actions throughout. Also, making said characters relatable; hooking the audience with their performances.
Mateo Vargas
What draws us to this character? He’s smart, and has a loveable personality. He’s someone you wouldn’t mind rooting for. Seems to be content with the peacefulness of life. And one mistake causes a major shift in his world — not for the good.
Traits: Easy-going, smart, ambitious, witty.
Subtext: Although, he’s engaged to be married, he still has a lust for his new coworker, Glorivette; which causes him to eventually cheat.
Flaw: When he begins to sneak and lie.
Values: Friendships, love, and work.
Irony: Mateo acts on his temptation, causing him to lie to his fiancé. When he tries to end the affair with Glorivette, she begins to make problems in Mateo’s personal and professional life.
What makes them the right character for the role? Mateo is your everyday man, who may become blinded by lust, and has to bump his head to realize the consequences acting on forbidden desires.
Glorivette Gomez
What draws us to this character? She’s sexy as hell. The way she’s half of Mateo’s age, and lures him into her world of seduction. Has the ability to own whatever room she’s in. Don’t be fooled by her stunning looks — Glorivette has a dark-side that’ll shake anyone’s core.
Traits: Manipulative, aggressive, hostile, seductive.
Subtext: Glorivette comes off as nice, but when things don’t go her way, she becomes a different person — endangering anyone in her path.
Flaw: She’s a murderer.
Values: Sex, terrorizing people, being in control.
Irony: Glorivette has two sides to her. She knows how to hypnotize men, before attacking like a viper. She’s the “good time” Mateo’s looking for outside of his regular day-to-day routine. You don’t know where the wind is going to blow dealing with her. That’s what makes her dangerous.
What makes them the right character for the role? She and Mateo will balance each other out with their chemistry. Whether it’s good, bad, or ugly, you won’t be able to deny the electricity between the two. Glorivette is the one in the driver seat with this story; everyone else is her pawns.
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Stafford Echols,
I agree to the terms of this release form.
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, communications, lessons, and models of the 30 Day Screenplay confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, communications, lessons, and models of the 30 Day Screenplay available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for The 30 Day Screenplay class.
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Stafford’s Character Profiles Part 1
What I learned from this assignment is how to make sure as the writer/creator, I understand my characters inside and out, and how they’ll navigate through my story. Also, it’s okay not to have your characters all figured out in the beginning. It’s a process like an interview — you’re getting to know them the more you pour into the world building.
Genre: Thriller
Protagonist: Mateo Vargas – Runner/Victim
Mateo, 25. Hispanic; black hair; bulky. Wears glasses. A software engineer. He’s smart and very likeable. He’s also engaged to be married to his loving fiancé.
Internal Journey: He goes from being witty and curious to ashamed and in fear of his life.
External Journey: From cheating to being faithful and doing whatever to stop his flame from destroying his world.
Motivation: Mateo is a rising star in his company. When he meets fellow temp, Glorivette, Mateo becomes instantly attracted to her. His temptation leads to a brief affair.
Wound: Mateo betrays his fiancé’s trust. He feels guilty for cheating. When he tries to end his affair, Glorivette becomes a living nightmare.
Mission/Agenda: To put his past indiscretions behind him, and move on with his life.
Secret: His affair with Glorivette. It can ruin his relationship, and cause disruption at his job.
What makes them special? Mateo isn’t a bad guy. Just a man who made a mistake. He let his lust get the best of him. That doesn’t take away from his brilliant mind and being a loveable person to those he know.
Antagonist: Glorivette Gomez – Villain/Predator/Change Agent
Glorivette, 42, but looks as if she were in her 20s. Sexy with long black hair. 5’11. Brown eyes.
Internal Journey: She goes from shy and understanding to deranged and obsessed.
External Journey: She goes from friendly and seductive to evil and murderous.
Motivation: Glorivette can have any man she wants. She hits it off with Mateo; preying on his vulnerability. She uses her beauty to lure Mateo into a heated affair.
Wound: Glorivette is getting older, and she wants love. Never receiving love correctly, it left hole in her heart. Be aware, playing with her emotions.
Mission/Agenda: To get Mateo to fall in love with her — voluntarily/involuntarily or else.
Secret: Glorivette isn’t who she appears to be, and has a viscous past.
What makes them special? Glorivette still looks amazing for her age; attracting men of all kinds to her mercy. She can hypnotize any man with her beauty. She’s also good at covering her tracks when she begins treacherous acts to sabotage Mateo’s livelihood.
Supporting Character: Ricky – Mateo’s best friend. Marisol – Mateo’s Fiancé. Gayland – Mateo’s boss. Sue – Mateo/Glorivette’s supervisor. Detective Fuentes – Investigating Glorivettes wrong-doings.
Minor Roles: Aylin – Ricky’s Wife. Juan – Marisol’s father. Ranger Luke.
Background characters: Various coworkers and partygoers.
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Stafford’s Transformational Journey
What I learned from this lesson is that your story is only as interesting as your lead’s journey. You have to take the reader/audience on a ride while they observe everything transpiring in the protagonist’s life. From he/she’s starting point — the obstacle/villain they have to face — strategizing a way for them to achieve whatever they’re trying to accomplish.
Hero/Protagonist: Mateo Vargas – A young software engineer, on the rise at his new job. He’s been engaged to his fiancé for 2 years. Things go left when Mateo makes a mistake; affecting he and those around him.
Internal Journey: He goes from witty and curious to ashamed and in fear of his life.
External Journey: Mateo cheats on his fiancé with Glorivette, and when he tries to break things off, Glorivette becomes aggressive, deranged, and an ominous-being who endangers Mateo and anyone who tries to come between them. Mateo tries to do everything in his power to stop Glorivette before it’s too late.
Old Ways: Witty, sharp, cheerful, curious, cheater.
New Ways: Survivalist, cautious, faithful, fearful, frustrated.
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Greetings Fellow Scribes,
I’m Stafford Echols, a screenwriter based in Chicago, IL.
I’ve written 5 features and 1 pilot; more content cooking.
What I hope to gain from this class, is the discipline to successfully get drafts done faster. The quickest I’ve written a draft is 2 months. If I’m ever a writer for hire, I’ll love to adapt the skill of picking up the pace. I have so many seed ideas that I need to develop, this class could be a huge asset to my screenwriting journey.
Something unusual about me: I’m a writer; it’s too many things to name, lol.
This is the third course I’ve taken through ScreenwritingU, looking forward to connecting with you all. Happy Writing!