Wayne Hazle
Forum Replies Created
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WAYNE HAZLE – LEVEL 2 – ACTION EMOTIONS
(My scene went right into SHOCK)
What I learned doing this scene was to grab my audience by the jugular!
SURPRISE:
SHOCK:
SETUP:
A crowd watches a military parade. The plane carrying the President and Vice-President fly overhead.
TRANSITION:
As the plane lowers Janine sees the trail from a missile go across the sky.
TRAGEDY:
The missile hits the plane and it explodes into
SUSPENSE:
Pandemonium, people run in all directions.
Police and press head to the site of wreckage
Janine traces the streak of the missile. Sher deciders to head that way
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I have been behind on my assignments, but the good news is I have been thinking and thinking about things. I finally had some great breakthroughs and I working things out. hope to talk some of you all soon
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WAYNE HAZLE – LEVEL 10 – ACTION EMOTIONS
What I learned doing this assignment is that the emotions create far more excitement than chases and fights.
ANXIETY: Janine walks toward the building where the girls are being held. She holds up her press pass. Not sure if they will attack her. She gets invited in. Not sure what will happen.
FEAR:
One of the men gets a phone call. Janine can sense the man is talking about her to someone. Janine knows she is in trouble now.
RELIEF: Just when it seems they are trapped. One of the militia guys has a heart. And shows them a path to escape.
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WAYNE HAZLE – LEVEL 10 – ACTION EMOTIONS
What I learned doing this assignment is that the emotions create far more excitement than chases and fights.
ANXIETY: Janine walks toward the building where the girls are being held. She holds up her press pass. Not sure if they will attack her. She gets invited in. Not sure what will happen.
FEAR:
One of the men gets a phone call. Janine can sense the man is talking about her to someone. Janine knows she is in trouble now.
RELIEF: Just when it seems they are trapped. One of the militia guys has a heart. And shows them a path to escape.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 8 months ago by Wayne Hazle. Reason: WRONG POSTING
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This reply was modified 2 years, 8 months ago by
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WAYNE HAZLE – TWISTS THAT ENGAGE US
What I learned doing this lesson is how important it is to make action that CONNECTS not just fill things with explosions
FIVE FAVORITE TWISTS!!!
NEW THREAT
While Janine interviews one of the militia members. They a get a phone call from one of the leaders. They tell the men to hold her until they get there.
IT JUST GOT WORSE
The men lock Janine in their compound She sees she will not be released.
TRAP – ESCAPE
Another woman who was attacked slips Janine a weapon. They use it to escape.
LOST RESOURCES – NEW RESOURCES
Janine loses her press pass. But she finds a satellite phone.
NEW THREAT – UNEXPECTED SUPPORT
One of the local people provides Janine and the girls an escape path
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Lesson 7: Map Out Your Story
What I learned (was reminded) is how amazing it is to map out your story without worrying about dialog. I also find myself fleshing out a lot of ideas. I’m also already seeing the weak spots in the story. I have a lot of work to do. 😒
OPENING
M1: Janine Henderson, student reporter and Yale Junior, arrives in break away Republic of XXXXX in Central Asia. She goes on Spring Break to meet with fellow student journalist
A1: A power sharing arrangement has been made between the majority Christian population and the minority Muslim population. (The Mahenga). The Presidential Cabinet will all board the Presidential plane, fly a celebratory flight over the country and then have a parade and celebration to praise the new Unity Government.
V1: General Resnik, commander of the military avoids the plane ride at the last minute, declaring he is ill.
INCITING INCIDENT
A2 The President’s plane is shot down. Pandemonium breaks out.
M2: Janine races to the origin site of the missile.
V2: General Resnik arrives at the parade site. The military says he is in charge now and must do what he is right. Resnik declares terrorists shot down the President’s plane and vows to avenge the loss. Resnik is challenged by another cabinet member who says he is next in line of succession. He also was not on the plane.
M3: Janine talks to someone who saw the shooter escape. Believes they got into a military vehicle. They show her a photograph.
A3: A bomb goes off killing the cabinet member. (We see clearly Resnik’s henchmen planted the bomb)
V3: General Resnik declares that he must rule the country now. He will not stop until “terrorism” is rated out.
M3: Janine hides out with a local family of Mahenga Muslim people. They tell her that they had nothing to do with the Presidential plane being shot down and that this is just a pretext to wipe out their population
A4: Mahenga men are rounded up and arrested.
A5: Militia begin combing the streets Non-residents are being expelled. They are brought to train stations and the airport.
FIRST TURNING POINT (END OF ACT 1)
M4: Janine decides she will stay with the Mahenga people and show the TRUTH.
A6: Local attacks against Mahenga take place.
V4: General Resnik gives an order to disband all local governments.The military begins seizing everything.
M5: Janine reaches her friend (Speaker of the House ) in DC. She says she is in the country. She says it is nothing but a coup and that a genocide is starting. Janine is told there must be proof.
V4: Resnik’s people receive word of Janine’s call. They are told to hunt her down. All outside communication including Internet and phone service is blocked.
M6: Janine flees to THE ROCK the ancestral home of the Mahenga to learn the true story.MID-POINT
VILLAIN: General Resnik holds a Triumph of the Will style rally.
ACTION: The Mahenga men that were rounded up are executed.
MISSION: Janine gets footage of the execution and its aftermath.
….
SECOND TURNING POINT (END OF ACT 2)
HERO Janine sends footer of the execution and its aftermath out to the world
VILLAIN: A full scale assault is launched agains the Mahenga.….
CRISIS
ACTION: Janine is captured.
VILLAIN: They pressure Janine to _____
…..
CLIMAX
ACTION: International Peacekeeping forces invade XXX and put down the genocide.
MISSION: Janine escapes.
ACTION: General Resnik is arrested
….
RESOLUTION
MISSION: Janine reports what has happened to the world. She helps the Mahenga people
ACTION: The widows of the President and Vice-President vow to form a unity government and work together for peace
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What I learned (was reminded) is the whole movie is built on these structure points.
OPENING
Janine arrives in a breakaway Eastern republic amid tensions and protests.
INCITING INCIDENT
A plane carrying the President and other politicians is shot down.
FIRST TURNING POINT (END OF ACT 1)
Janine sends a message back to DC stating that the assassination was an inside job not terrorism and that it is a pretext to genocide of the Muslim minority Mahenga people.
MID-POINT
A mass killing of Mahenga men takes place. Janine gets photographic evidence. General Resnik declares himself sole leader of the country.
SECOND TURNING POINT (END OF ACT 2)
Janine gets proof of the planned coup and the genocide out to the world. She is captured.
CRISIS
Janine is held by General Resnik and Damir his henchmen. (She needs to be pushed for some secret.) A full scale attack begins against the Mahenga stronghold.
CLIMAX
International peacekeeping forces invade ____ and stop the genocide.
RESOLUTION
The widows of the President and Vice President vow to work together for peace.
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What I learned doing this was that I could outline my whole story around the action set pieces.
PURSUIT: Janine races to origin of the missile. She hunts to find answers.
Purpose: to show her dogged investigative skills.
FIGHT/RESCUE: Janine sees two young Mahenga kids getting attacked by locals. She fights them off. Rescues the kids.
Purpose: to show Janine as a freedom fighter who will put herself on the line. To introduce her to the Mahenga people. (Perhaps her driver is killed but before dying he asks Janine to save his daughter.)
EVADE: Young men are being rounded up. Janine makes a call to people back home about killing that are going to start. Janine evades capture by militia.
Purpose: Janine willing to risk herself for the truth.
DANGEROUS SITUATION: Janine witnesses the massacre of Mehenga men. Gets evidence. Again escapes militia.
Purpose: to hurl Janine into something she cannot ignore. Insight intro the villain and how barbaric they are.
DANGEROUS SITUATION 2: Janine find the one place that still has Internet connection. She gets there and releases her files to the world. …. She is captured.
Purpose: the battle of wills between Resnik and Janine grows stronger.
INTERROGATION: Janine is pulled in front of Resnik and Damir. He tells her she has failed, the message was blocked, nothing will, stop his forces now. The siege of the stronghold begins.
Purpose: the highest stakes. Villain has delusions of grandeur.
ESCAPE: Janine escapes from her prison. International forces invade. Damir is killed. Attack on stronghold is stopped. Resnik’s forces are put down.
Purpose: the villains are stopped. Janine’s message did make it out! She has triumphed and proven herself a capable war correspondent.
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General Resnik – Villain plans:
SCHEME: General Resnik avoids getting on the presidential plane at the last minute
ATTACK: Resnik’s militia shoots down the President’s plane.
UNLEASH: Resnik’s forces begin attacking the Mahenga. Martial law imposed.
SURPRISED: Hears Janine sending out message saying a genocide is planned.
PURSUIT: Sends forces out to find Janine
ASCENDS TO POWER: Declares himself ruler of the country.
DECEPTION: Lies to international envoys about the genocide claiming he is stopping terrorism.
RETALIATION: Launches full scale invention of stronghold of Mehenga people.
CAPTURE: Captures Janine. Intends her execution.
SURPRISE ASSAULT: International forces invade the country. Stopping the genocide.
FITTING ENDING: Resnik arrested (or forced to flee)
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What I feel I learned in this step is that I can work out major structural issues here before ever writing a line of dialog.
A. What is it about this Hero that will have them go straight into the face of the overwhelming odds?
Janine has a dogged determine to tell truth. She has wanted to be a journalist since she was a child. She also sees people suffering and wants to help.
B. What is the mission that would be an impossible goal?
Janine is behind enemy lines in a country where the military has seized power and cut off all outside communication.
Janine Henderson’s Basic Mission Steps
Clear Mission: To alert the world about the massacre Mahenga Muslim people in the breakaway Republic of XXX (Eastern European Country) and stop the genocide
Motivation: Janine is on vacation with friends in XXX. She senses the political tension between the minority group and the rise of a far right militia.
Inciting Incident: A plane carrying the President and other top political leaders is shot down. Unrest followed by martial law is imposed.
First Action: Janine investigates the area where the missile that shot down thew President’s plane was launched.
Obstacle: Military begins sealing off areas. Outside communication (phone and Internet) is cut off.
Escalation: The assassination of the President is blamed on a group of Muslims in the region called the Mahenga. Violence against the Mahenga increases. Non-citizens are rounded up and forced out of the country.
Hide Out: Janine hides out with a group of Mahenga in their village.
Overwhelming Odds: Local militia begin rounding up Mahenga people and attacking them.
Apparent Victory: Janine is able to reach a contact in DC ns tell them what is happening.
Twist: The US and other countries say that that evidence is not enough to act.
Discovery: It is discovered that Janine is in the country and begin a search to capture and kill her to stop her reporting.
New Plan: Janine must get picture and video evidence of the genocide sent to her contacts in DC.
Full Out Attack: The military launches a large attack against the stronghold of the Mahenga. They intensify their hunt for Janine and any other outside journalists.
Twist: Janine gets evidence to prove the Mahenga has nothing to do with the assassination. Janine is able to send this evidence and proof of the genocide to the UN, the Hague and other international bodies.
Apparent Defeat: Janine is caught by the military. She is dragged before General Resnik an his henchman Damir. They intend to execute her.
Success: Janine fights to the death with Damir. She escapes. An international military force invades and stops the genocide. General Resnik is captured.
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What I feel I learned in this step is that I can work out major structural issues here before ever writing a line of dialog.
Janine Henderson – Basic Mission Steps
Clear Mission: To alert the world about the massacre Mahenga Muslim people in the breakaway Republic of XXX and stop the genocide
Motivation: Janine is on vacation with friends in XXXX. Sees the political tension
Inciting Incident: A plane carrying the President and other top political leaders is shot down. Unrest followed by martial law is imposed.
First Action: Janine investigates the area where the missile was shot from
Obstacle: Military begins sealing off areas. Outside communication (phone and Internet) is cut off.
Escalation: The assassination of the President is blamed on a group of Muslims in the region called the Mahenga. Violence against the Mahenga increases. Non-citizens are rounded up and forced out of the country.
Hide Out: Janine hides out with a group of Mahenga in their village.
Overwhelming Odds: Local militia begin rounding up Mahenga people and attacking them.
Apparent Victory: Janine is able to reach a contact in DC ns tell them what is happening.
Twist: The US and other countries are unwilling to act.
Discovery: It is discovered that Janine is in the country and begin a search to capture and kill her to stop her reporting.
New Plan: Janine must get picture and video evidence of the genocide sent to her contacts in DC and around the world
Full Out Attack: The military launches a large attack against the stronghold of the Mahenga. They intensify their hunt for Janine and any other outside journalists.
Twist: Janine gets evidence to prove the Mahenga has nothing to do with the assassination. Janine is able to send this evidence and proof of the genocide to the UN, the Hague and other international bodies.
Apparent Defeat: Janine is caught by the military. She is dragged before General Resnik an his henchman Damir. They intend to execute her.
Success: Janine fights to the death with Damir. She escapes. An international military force invades an stops the genocide. General Resnik is captured
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“Untitled Janine Henderson Adventure 2″‘
Janine Henderson / General Vaska Resnik. (Hero / Villain)
What I learned by doing this assignment is that by spelling out these key points of the script, I am laying building blocks and setting up great tension.
CONCEPT
In a breakaway republic in an Eastern European nation, a plane carrying the President and other major politicians is shot down. Janine Henderson, student journalist extraordinaire sees the event. She discovers that the assassination is actually a coup d’état by a rogue general who is using it a cover to begin ethnically cleansing his country of a minority group of Muslims. Janine works to get word out to the world about the genocide and stop it.
• Hero Morally Right – Janine wants to let the world know about the genocide and stop it.
• Villain Morally Wrong – General Resnik wants to control his country and is willing to massacre people to do it
HERO – Janine Henderson
• Unique Skill Set – Technology, Journalism, martial Arts
• Motivation – A burning desire to tell the truth and to see justice
• Secret or Wound – Her parents divorcing has sent her in an emotional tailspin
VILLAIN – General Vaska Resnik
• Unbeatable – General Resnik controls the military, and all outside communications. He has a roving gang of thugs who are devoted to him
• Plan/Goal – To seize all power in his country and ethnically cleanse it
• What they lose if the hero survives – He will lose power and go to jail as a war criminal
IMPOSSIBLE MISSION
• Put hero in Action – A plane carrying the President gets shot down. A massacre begins of a local Muslim population
• Demands They Go Beyond Their Best – Janine uses her skill to evade being captured or killed and to get evidence of the genocide out to the world
• Destroy the Villain – Janine must stop General Resnik. She fights to the death with his henchman Damir Kaminsky.
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What I learned doing this assignment is to boil things down to the very simplest elements to see if the concept works.
TITLE: ???
HIGHLY SKILLED HERO: Janine Henderson, an ambitious, highly intelligent and capable student journalist vacations on spring break in an Eastern European country.
DEMAND FOR ACTION: A coup takes place. Martial law is imposed. People are trapped in the country and all outside communication is blocked. A brutal genocide begins against the minority Muslim population.
MISSION: While evading capture, Janine works to get evidence of the genocide out to the world in order to prompt them to take action and stop the carnage.
ANTAGONIST: A brutal nationalist and his henchman who will try to wipe out a people to consolidate power.
ESCALATING ACTION: Janine struggles to stay one step ahead of the coup forces who are pursuing her. The death toll in the genocide mounts. Janine works frantically to find a way to send her proof out to the world.
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Wayne Hazle
15 scripts. I have written, directed and produced a few shorts.
To streamline and improve the action I am using in some of my current scripts
My 9 year old twin daughters have told me that if I get one of my features produced there better be a part for them.
I am really looking forward to getting sharper and getting to know you all
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Wayne Hazle
I, Wayne Hazle, agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.