Eve Williams
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Eve Williams’ Scary-As-Hell Scene
What I learned from doing this assignment is that small scares can be funny and terrifying at the same time.
INT -GARAGE- AFTERNOON
The dimly lit garage is finished out as rudimentary office space, and was the model home sales office for the subdivision. Washer dryer hook-ups and a janitorial sink are on one wall.
Near the dusty windows, hundreds of dead flies and bugs litter the floor. A dying fly spins around and around, buzzing noisily.
A single buzzing suspended light bulb does little to illuminate the space.
Broom, dustpan, and paper towels in hand, Maria eyes the desk, table with sales brochures, and chairs. A dirty coffee pot, complete with the desiccated remains of coffee, catches her attention.
After leaning the broom and dustpan against the wall, she picks up the coffee pot
She sticks the pot under the tap and turns the hot water faucet.
Nothing. She tries the cold water faucet. Still nothing.
After setting down the pot, she squats down to check the shut off valves.
And sees a FACE looking back at her.
She jumps back and ends up on her butt.
A skittering behind her.
Still on the floor, she turns to see NOTHING.
Carefully, she peers under the janitorial sink.
And sees a mirror propped against the wall under the sink.
A bit relieved, Maria pulls out the mirror, and sets it on a counter. She picks it up, and gives it a quick cleaning with a paper towel.
Behind her, the broom falls with a THWACK.
Startled, Maria drops the mirror. It shatters into tiny pieces.
Maria stares the broken mirror shards. Then crosses herself.
MARIA
‘¡Dios mío!
After grabbing the broom and dust pan, she carefully cleans up the shards and dumps the bits into an empty box.
A few missed shards catch her eye; she sweeps them up and slides them into the box.
Involuntarily, she shivers as she walks over the desk. Glossy brochures touting the El Mirage Subdivision are scattered on the desk top. She arranges picks them up and tosses them into the trash can. All but one land in the can.
A skittering behind her. Maria turns and sees…NOTHING.
From the brochure on the floor, a large photo of a grinning man stares back at her. Bold lettering on the bottom of the brochure announces : LET ME TAKE YOU HOME.
Maria plucks the brochure from the floor.
The light bulb POPS and the space is now nearly dark, lit only by the sunlight from the dirty garage door windows.
A HISS. In a dark corner, a coiled object gains Maria’s attention.
MARIA
EEEEEEEEEEEKKK!!
After grabbing the broom, she repeatedly beats the coils, then stops and steps back.
Tentatively, she creeps toward the object, and pokes it with the broom.
It’s a rope. Relieved but sheepish, Maria shakes her head and shrugs.
She turns away and dabs at her flushed face with a tissue.
A skittering sound from the same corner.
Using the broom, Maria pokes at the rope, pulling at the rope. At its end is a hangman’s noose.
Maria crosses herself and backs away.
A mouse suddenly runs from the corner, heading toward Maria.
MARIA
EEEEEEEEEEEEEKKK!
Maria jumps on the nearest chair, and watches as the mouse attempts to crawl up the chair legs.
A game of Whack-a-Mouse ensues, and Maria eventually pummels the mouse to death.
Stepping from the chair, Maria cautiously approaches the flatted bloody mouse bits.
From behind Maria, a man’s low chuckle.
Maria whirls around to see…NOTHING.
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Hi Folks:
This week-end, I’m off to Arizona on business.
So I might be late on my next lesson post.
Eve Williams’ Scene with Scares, Releases, and Creepy Moments
What I learned from doing this assignment is that even small things can be unnerving.
INT – BATHROOM – AFTERNOON
Maria turns on the faucet and sticks her reddened hand under the cool water.
From the mirror, her frightened reflection stares back.
She leans down and bathes her face with the cool water.
As she straightens up, she grabs a hand towel and dries her face.
Wincing a bit, she places her hand back under the cool water.
The water suddenly runs hot, and Maria jerks her hand away.
In the fogged mirror, a dark, blurry shape is seen behind her.
Maria wheels around to see…nothing. Nothing but a patterned shower curtain. Maria moves the shower curtain, and releases that the blurry shape was the pattern on the shower curtain.
Involuntarily, Maria shivers, then lets out a relieved sigh.
She turns off the faucet and raises the hand towel to clear the steamed mirror.
On the mirror are the letters P-E-E-K
Maria gasps, and steps back to watch as more letters appear on the mirror.
A-B-O-O…
A quick wipe at the mirror erases the letters.
Uneasily, Maria places the hand towel on the rack and walks to the door.
As she switches off the light, a man’s low chuckle…
She immediately switches the light back on to see…Nothing.
Trembling a bit, Maria leaves. The bathroom light goes off…
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Eve Williams’ Level 3 Horror Emotion Scene.
What I learned from doing this assignment is that I need to add more traumatic emotions to my scene.
EXT- STREET – NIGHT
Full on desert storm: hard rain, dark boiling clouds, whipping winds, thunder and lighting.
The house’s front door bangs open, and Maria is sucked out into the front yard. After staggering a few steps, she regains her balance and attempts to go back into the house.
MARIA
Jesus! Jesus!
The winds blows her backward, and she crouches down and crawls toward the house. Just as she reaches the front door, Jesus is propelled past her.
He hits the ground and rolls over and over until he hits the rear tire of the truck. Jesus lies motionless.
Maria gets up and runs toward him, but is sucked backward toward the house.
A huge black apparition appears at the door to greet her. Maria yells and fights to remain on her feet. She turns and runs screaming toward the frame stage house next door.
A dust devil forms in the front yard and throws sand and rocks in all directions. The Apparition walks through the dust devil, and it splits into two.
The apparition looks for Jesus, and walks toward the truck.
Watching in terror from the frame stage house, Maria spies Jesus hiding under the truck.
Maria runs from the frame stage house.
MARIA
HEY YOU!
The apparition turns and looks at Maria.
MARIA
YOUR HOUSE IS A PIECE OF SHIT!
Enraged, the apparition races toward Maria, who runs inside the frame stage house.
MARIA
PIECE OF SHIT!
Enraged, the apparition throws its arms upward. A lighting bolt hits the frame stage house and it bursts into flames.
Maria runs to the next frame stage house and hides. Outside, the apparition appears, looking in a window opening for her. Maria looks around the structure, yelling.
MARIA
YOU THINK I WANTED TO LIVE HERE?
The apparition growls, and waves its arms. Lighting hits the frame stage house.
Maria runs to the next, and crouches behind a creosote bush.
MARIA
HERE?
The apparition charges toward her, and lighting hits the structure.
Maria dashes to the next frame stage structure and ducks inside.
Jesus rolls out from under the truck and sprints toward Maria’s new hiding place. He falls in the middle of the street.
The apparition moves slowly toward Jesus, who lies motionless in the street.
Maria steps out from her hiding place.
MARIA
STOP!
The apparition stares at Maria and gives a deep growling laugh.
APPARITION
OR WHAT?
The apparition completely envelopes Jesus, who wakes up and starts coughing.
MARIA
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
APPARITION
LEAVE THIS PLACE!
MARIA
DEAL!
Maria quickly heads toward the apparition and Jesus.
MARIA
JESUS! VAMOS!
Jesus runs to Maria, who hugs him tightly.
APPARITION
AND YOUR BABY.
Maria grabs Jesus’ hand and they sprint to the last frame stage house. Once inside, Maria and Jesus hide behind construction debris.
The apparition enters the last frame stage house, and searches for them.
MARIA and JESUS
Saint Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle.
Maria lobs a brick at the apparition; after passing through it, it hits the back wall.
MARIA and JESUS
Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil
The apparition appears to laugh, and a beam in the house falls near Maria and Jesus.
MARIA and JESUS
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray.
A large creak, and another beam falls free, crashing on the floor behind Maria and Jesus. They run to the other side of the structure, and duck behind a pile of lumber.
MARIA and JESUS
O Prince of the heavenly host, by the power of God,
The apparition screams and the frame of the structure shakes.
MARIA and JESUS
Thrust into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who wander…
Maria throws the crucifix at the apparition, and grabs Jesus’ hand. As they run from the structure, Maria and Jesus scream the end of the prayer.
MARIA and JESUS
Through the world for ruin of souls. AMEN!.
A massive bolt of lighting hits the structure, and a huge fireball forms. A short distance outside the flaming structure, Jesus is knocked off his feet. Maria stumbles, catching herself on one hand before falling completely.
Unearthly screaming of a thousand demons. Then silence.
Maria crawls to her feet. A short distance away lies a motionless Jesus. She shakes him.
MARIA
Jesus! Jesus!
Maria cradles Jesus in her arms. He opens his eyes and smiles.
Maria gets up, and helps him to his feet. Slowly, they walk away from the smoldering ruins.
MARIA
Let’s go home.
The rain stops as they walk to their home.
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Eve Williams’ Level 2 Horror Emotion Scene.
What I learned from doing this assignment is to continue to ask: “What could be worse?” to ramp up the fear, suspense, and dread in the scene.
EXT- BACK YARD – DAY
A frantic Maria runs outside, looking for Bonita. Angry grey black clouds joist in the sky, blotting out the sun.
MARIA
Bonita! Bonita!
She searches under the bushes, by the fence, and near the house.
The wind kicks up and blows the desert sands and the many tumbleweeds at the end of the yard. The tumbleweeds roll around and smack into each other; it’s like tumbleweed bumper car.
A huge murder of big black crows swirls overhead, cawing and cackling. One at a time, the crows land on the fence and sit, shoulder to shoulder.
The crows silently watch as Maria continues to hunt.
MARIA
Bonita! Chiquita!
Near the house, Maria spies another pile of sun bleached bones. Using a found branch, she digs around the bones and unearths the skull of a possum.
A crow leans forward, back, and CAWS loudly. Several others mimic the first and more join in. Soon all the fence sitting crows are CAWING and bobbing and dipping. Maria waves the branch at the birds.
MARIA
SHOO!
The birds CAW even louder, bobbing frantically.
MARIA
¡VETE!
Maria lobs the stick at the lead bird, who jumps as the stick hits the fence. Pissed, the lead bird CAWS and flies at Maria. The other birds follow, forming a black swirling mass.
Arms over her face and head, Maria crouches. As they swirl above her, the birds vomit, regurgitating bones and liquid.
A few birds dive bomb Maria, who now hugs the ground.
A low whistle, and the birds tight swirl widens. With a mighty flapping of wings, the birds fly off. A petrified and bird vomit covered Maria cautiously uncovers her face and looks up.
Using her T-shirt, she quickly wipes at the bird vomit. And sees faint dog foot prints in the sand.
Cautiously, she stands and looks at the trail of dog footprints. They end in a small metal shed.
Slowly, Maria follows the footprints to the shed. It is secured with a padlock.
MARIA
Bonita?
Faint scrabbling and scratching noises from inside the shed. Slightly relieved, Maria twists and turns, the padlock, attempting to break it free.
MARIA
Ya voy. Chiquita!
After a minute of manipulating the uncooperative padlock, she steps back . Reflexively, she rubs at a splat of vomit on her arm. Her hand hits the key ring tied to her wrist.
MARIA
Ay…
Maria studies the keys and tries the smallest one. The key goes in the padlock, but it won’t turn. Again she studies the keys. More faint scratches from inside the shed.
Selecting another small key, Maria carefully inserts it into the padlock. The hasp snaps free and Maria slides open the door. A click and a swoosh.
Suspended from a rope, a cow skull swings free into the open door. Maria ducks as it just clears her head. Terrified, she crab crawls backwards.
After several decelerating arcs, the cow skull stops, trembling slightly.
With dread, Maria creeps forward.
MARIA
Bonita? Baby?
Maria stares into the dimly lit shed, focusing on the concrete floor. The clouds part, and an angry ray of orange sunshine lights the darkened shed.
Festooned with spent red candles, bones, and feathers, a faded pentagram is painted on the floor. Centered in the pentagram, on an upside down cross is a dead Bonita.
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Eve Williams’ Level 1 Horror Emotion Scene.
“What I learned from doing this assignment is to include even minor foreshadowing elements that cause apprehension and fear in the characters. “
Outline of the scene:
Apprehension: Constant coyote howls, yips; rustling in the bushes; dust devil attack; sticks snapping.
Surprise: Alberto is surprised at Maria’s reticence for her new home; cell phone signal very difficult to find.
Shock: Bonita and Jesus’s primal fear of the new place; the small waving shadowy figure who waves to Jesus.
EXT- HOUSE – NIGHT
Cell phone in hand, Alberto goes outside into the blustery night. Creosote bushes rustle, and an alpha male coyote begins a group howl.
Jesus and Bonita stand near the truck. Bonita barks and whines as she attempts to get back in the truck. An exasperated Alberto, puts his phone in his pocket and motions to the dog.
ALBERTO
Make her pee and take her inside.
Bonita stands her ground, ignoring Jesus’ tugs. Alberto unloads boxes and trash bags from the truck’s bed; he shoves a bag toward Jesus’ free hand.
ALBERTO
Vamos Vamos Vamos
Dragging a whining Bonita, Jesus walks toward the house.
ALBERTO
Then come back and help.
A lazy dust devil meanders toward the motley stacks of belongings; it lurches toward Jesus and Bonita, causing both to jump. Staccato snapping of sticks, then the coyote howls crescendo
JESUS
I’m scared.
ALBERTO
You’re scared?
Of what?
Jesus shrugs. The lease pulls tight as Bonita pulls toward the safety of the truck.
ALBERTO
(In Spanish)
Mama’s boy.
(In English)
Don’t be a baby. Go on.
Dragging Bonita, Jesus heads for the front door. A low whistle from the frame stage house next door. A small shadowy figure waves.
Jesus stares, then raises his arm to wave. The figure is gone. Jesus leans forward and stops, searching for the figure. An exasperated Alberto throws up his hands in the air.
After a moment. Bonita in tow, Jesus slowly heads into the house.
Maria exits the house and picks up several small sacks near the truck. She watches as Alberto again tries for a cell signal. She jumps and shivers at the even louder coyote howls.
ALBERTO
Frio?
MARIA
Un porquito.
An involuntary shiver…
MARIA
The house is beautiful but…
She follows Alberto into the street as he attempts to locate more than one bar.
MARIA
It’s so far out. So far from…everyone.
And Jesus. Who will he play with?
Alberto motions down the street at the dimly lit homes.
ALBERTO
Neighbors. There’ll be kids his age.
Maria forces a tired smile and nods. Sacks in hand, she heads into the house.
ALBERTO
ARRIBA!
Nearly in the house, Maria jerks and quickly turns. Standing in the middle of the street, Alberto triumphantly raises his phone in the air.
ALBERTO
Two and a half bars!
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Eve Williams’ Outline
ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
EXT – MOJAVE DESERT – NIGHT
Moonless night in the Mojave Desert. Far away from civilization, an older pick-up towing a loaded trailer heads down a deserted road.
INT – TRUCK -NIGHT
Inside the truck is Alberto, an already worn Hispanic man in his early 30s, Maria, tired and 26, 5 months pregnant; Jesus, coke bottle glasses wearing 5 year old; Bonita a fat old Chihuahua, and Lolita Bird, a vocal green Conure parrot.
They are lost, and have been for a while.
Tired and confused, they consult the map again. Eventually…
The truck’s headlights illuminate a worn sign: El Mirage Heights. Dimly lit homes line the short street.
EXT – FRONT YARD – NIGHT
Alberto and Maria quickly exit the truck, and grab several faded duffle bags.
Maria takes Lolita Bird’s cage in her spare hand and walks toward the house. The bird yells and crouches in the against the bottom of cage. .
Jesus remains slumped in the truck. Alberto tugs him out and hands him the end of Bonita’s dog lease.
As Bonita runs to the end of her lead, attempting to get back in the truck. Jesus jerks the lease, and walks to the edge of the yard. Uneasily, he stares at the house.
Typical tract home; it was the model home for the El Mirage Heights subdivision.
Outside the front door, Alberto proposes to Maria. He shoves a key ring with the house keys on her ring finger. In doing so, he scratches her finger, which drops blood.
Maria says yes, and wipes at her finger as she enters the house.
INT HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Typical open concept living room/dining, and kitchen. Sheet draped model home furniture remains.
Maria says that the house is so far out. Alberto says that she saw the neighbors’ homes and they won’t be alone.
Alberto attempts to get a cell signal. No luck.
EXT- HOUSE – NIGHT
Alberto goes outside and sees Jesus and Bonita still standing near the truck.
Alberto tells Jesus to take Bonita inside the house and came back out to help unpack the truck. Jesus tells him he’s afraid. Exasperated, Alberto makes a remark about Jesus being a big ass baby. And that he needs to man up.
Jesus hears a low whistle, and looks over to see a small figure standing by the house next door. The figure waves. Jesus stares, then raises his arm to wave.
But the figure is gone. Bonita in tow, Jesus slowly heads into the house.
In the front yard, Alberto searches for a cell signal. He locates one while standing in the middle of the street.
EXT – FRONT YARD – BEFORE DAWN
Before dawn, Alberto is picked up by a co-worker. They’re off to Northern Nevada to work construction for a week.
INT – HOUSE – A SHORT TIME LATER
Jesus hears a knocking at his window. He looks out but sees no one.
Then knocking at the front door, where a black eyed little boy stands.
Jesus asks Maria if he can let him in. Maria believes it is Alberto, who has forgotten something.
She tells Jesus to let him in. So he does. The Black Eyed boy is only seen outside the house, but Jesus admits he invites him inside.
Maria quickly dresses and goes to the living room. Confused when she doesn’t see Alberto, Maria asks Jesus where he is.
Jesus tells Maria that a little boy was at the door but he left.
EXT – HOUSE – EARLY MORNING
Walking Bonita, Maria and Jesus go outside to find the boy’s home.
They look down the street and see that the “homes” are actually weathered frame stage homes with false fronts.
No one else lives in El Mirage Heights. They are completely alone.
Given that there are no neighbors, Maria decides that the Black Eyed Boy is a figment of Jesus’ imagination. Or a new imaginary friend.
INT – HOUSE (BEDROOMS and HALL) – DAY
Going from bedroom to bedroom, Maria pounds nails into the wall and hangs crucifixes above the beds. The next time she returns to each room, the crucifixes are turned 90%
Unnerved, she carefully straightens each crucifix.
EXT – BACK YARD – DAY
Maria takes Bonita out to pee in the backyard. The whipping wind startles the dog, who whimpers and runs back to the door. It also uncovers a stack of bones.
Maria examines the bones, attempting to figure out if they are animal or human.
INT – LIVING ROOM – DAY
Maria is unpacking, and hears water running. She follows the sound to the bathroom.
INT – HALL – DAY
Calling for Jesus, she knocks on the closed door.
Jesus looks into the hall from his room.
When Maria opens the bathroom door, the water runs for a second, then stops. Maria is afraid, but doesn’t want to upset Jesus.
INT – BATHROOM – DAY
Maria fiddles with the faucet handles, and tells Jesus to make sure the faucet is completely off.
INT – JESUS’ BEDROOM – DAY.
Jesus carefully places his toys on a shelf, stepping back to admit the display. One slowly moves to the edge of the shelf, teeters, and falls to the floor.
Jesus removes his glasses, wipes the lenses, and puts them on. He picks up the toy and examines it. He places it back on the shelf.
INT – LIVING ROOM – DAY
Maria fitfully dozes on the coach, where she has a nightmare about losing her baby. She wakes up with a start, clutching her stomach.
INT – BATHROOM – DAY
Maria races into the bathroom and throws up.
Swaying a bit as the stands, she wipes a wet wash cloth on her face. She stares at her reflection in the mirror. And notices a man standing behind her.
Maria turns around. No one is there.
INT – LIVING ROOM – DAY
Horror Situation: From her cage in the living room, Lolita Bird watches Bonita who is having a violent nightmare as she sleeps on the kitchen floor. Bonita yips, rolls, and kicks her legs.
A cabinet door slowly opens. Then another. And another. Until all are open. Then all but one shut with a bang. Lolita Bird jungle yells and Bonita wakes up and barks frantically.
Bonita slides across the kitchen floor into the living room. Lolita Bird’s cage shakes violently and the bird yells; “La Migra”!
Jesus runs into the living room, and attempts to calm Bonita and Lolita Bird.
A creak from the remaining open cabinet door gets Jesus’ attention. He watches it slam shut, then walks over and opens it. Then shuts it. And opens it. And shuts it.
INT – KITCHEN – AFTERNOON
Maria hangs the house key ring on a hook in the kitchen. She places hand towels in a drawer and paper towels a cabinet. Then leaves.
She returns a short time later, and walks by the hook. The keys are gone.
She frantically searches the room for the keys. No luck.
INT – JESUS’ BEDROOM – NIGHT
Jesus sleeps fitfully in his bed.
Tapping above his head wakes him. Motionless, he stares up at the wall. Curious, he taps back on the wall.
Another tap from the wall. Then a battery toy car comes to life, and drives across the floor.
Jesus watches the car, then burrows under the sheets.
INT – MARIA’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Maria dreams that a monster is chasing her through the desert. She ducks and weaves and hieds. But the monster still follows.
She flails about in the bed, only waking when she feels something hard and pointed in the bed sheets.
Maria stares at her missing keys. Using a cord on the nightstand, she ties the key ring to her wrist.
ACT 2 – THE POINT OF NO RETURN
INT – MARIA’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Maria awakens to the sound of a baby crying. She checks on Jesus, who is soundly sleeping.
Then walks into the nursery and gazes into the crib. It is empty.
INT – NURSERY – NIGHT
A music box plays.
A sleepy Jesus pokes his head inside, then walks in and stops. He picks up the music box and turns it off.
A voice says: Jesus…
A confused Jesus answers: Mama?
INT – BATHROOM – MORNING
Maria plugs in her cell phone and sets it on the bathroom vanity. She brushes her teeth and then leaves.
A short time later, carrying an armful of towels, Maria enters. She hums as she places the towels in the cabinets.
Then notices the phone’s charging cord is missing. She searches the top of the vanity, then the floor. After a brief search, she finds it in the toilet.
Fishing out the cord, she yells for Jesus. When he doesn’t come, she goes to his room. The door is shut. Annoyed, she pauses briefly.
Muffled voices from inside the room. One is Jesus. But the other?
Maria freezes, then places her ear to the door. Brow furrowed, the lilt of the children’s voices confuse her. She knocks, then tries to open the door. It is locked.
Yelling, Maria pounds on the door. She tries the knob again. It turns.
INT- JESUS’ BEDROOM – MORNING
Maria walks in to see Jesus sitting on the floor, playing with his toys. Maria asks he who he was talking to. Jesus said “my friend”.
Visibly mad, Maria tells Jesus not to lie to her about having a friend. And accuses him of dropping her charging cord in the toilet.
Jesus denies knowing anything about the charging cord and says he does too have a friend.
The crucifix above Jesus’ bed knocks against the wall, beginning a clockwise turn. The crucifix rotates 180 degrees as Jesus and Maria watch.
Maria crosses herself, and runs to right the crucifix. It burns her hand and it falls to the floor. Maria clutches her hand and leaves.
Jesus hears a low whistle. Then another. Jesus calls for his friend.
He looks under the bed and sees the black eyed boy staring back at him.
Jesus tells the boy he must leave. The boy tells him “you ask me in”.
INT – BATHROOM – MORNING
Maria’s in the bathroom, washing her reddened hand. The temperature of the water changes from cold to hot and she yanks her hand out of the flow.
Words slowly appear in the steamed mirror. P-E-E-K-A-B-O-O… A dark reflection in the mirror forms behind Maria
Maria spins around to see…Nothing. She quickly wipes the mirror. As she leaves the bathroom, a man’s low chuckle…
INT – GARAGE – DAY
Maria is in the garage, which is finished out with office space.
She discovers El Mirage Heights brochures, with glossy pictures of her house and the partially built others on the cul-de-sac.
A large photo of a grinning man is prominent above the phase “Let Me Take You Home”.
Maria hears a hiss behind her. A large snake is coiled in the corner of the garage.
She grabs a broom and beats the snake. Then notices it is only a rope.
Rubbing her eyes, she uses the broom to pull the rope out to see if the snake is under it. At the end of the rope is a hangman’s noose.
A man’s low chuckle…
Maria yells: “This is MY HOUSE”. Stop It!”
INT – HOUSE – DAY
Crucifix and Rosary in hand, Maria attempts to cleanse the house.
Unseen by Maria, a ghostly hand reaches out and brushes Maria’s hair as she passes through the hall.
Maria touches her hair, and turns to see no one.
INT – LIVING ROOM – DAY
Lolita Bird sleeps in her cage. An dark form approaches, and shakes the cage wildly.
Lolita Bird jungle yells, attempts to bite the form. Then yells ‘La Migra! La Migra”
MIDPOINT
EXT – BACKYARD – AFTERNOON
Maria is in the backyard, searching for Bonita. She follows footprints leading to a metal shed. It is locked. Trying the smallest key on the key ring secured to her wrist, Maria unlocks the door.
She opens the door, and suspended cow skull swings past her head. On the concrete floor is a painted pentagram, spent candles, and bones. In the middle of the pentagram is a dead Bonita.
Maria screams and runs back to the house.
INT -HOUSE – LATER
Maria tries to call Alberto. No signal.
She wanders through the house, looking for a signal.
EXT – FRONT YARD – LATER
Still looking for a signal, Maria tries in various places in the front yard.
Standing in the middle of the street, Maria finally finds two bars. And places the call.
No answer. She leaves a frantic voice mail.
INT – LIVING ROOM – LATE AFTERNOON
Outside, the desert winds howl and rocks hit the house. And then it is quiet. Maria looks outside and sees her Doppelganger. Who is not pregnant.
Maria subconsciously touches her stomach. She looks outside and nothing is there.
In an attempt to keep out the horror, Maria tapes old newspapers she’s found in the house over the windows.
In one newspaper, Maria reads about a developer who committed suicide in the model home of his failed subdivision El Mirage Heights.
Maria recognizes the man as the one on the brochure and the apparition she’s seen.
EXT – FRONT YARD – EVENING
Carrying bags, Maria runs to the truck. Jesus follows with Lolita Bird’s cage. They open the doors and jump inside.
INT – TRUCK – EVENING
Maria fumbles but manages to shove the key in ignition. The truck’s engine catches and the radio blares. Then it sputters and stops.
Maria frantically tries again, starter motor whirs. And again.
Then just click, click. Dead battery.
Maria steels herself, and gathers up a few bags and Lolita-Bird in her cage. She and Jesus slowly leave the truck.
EXT – FRONT YARD – EVENING
A monstrous wind batters the pair as fight their way back to the home. Lighting, then thunder shakes the earth. A pelting rain begins as they run back to the house.
Lighting flashes, illuminating the hanged man in the house’s dormer window.
Maria is terrified, and Jesus runs faster to the front door.
INT – LIVING ROOM – EVENING
Maria and Jesus barricade the doors.
Outside, black birds pound the windows; several break their way inside and fly wildly around the room. They are joined by swarms of bats. The power goes out.
Maria grabs a broom and swings wildly at the flying creatures. Jesus’ glasses are knocked off and he drops to the floor, reaching out to find them.
Using all of their strength, Maria and Jesus fight back against the Bats, Birds, and the Monster.
Banging inside and outside the house.
The Monster shows itself as the hanged man, who grabs Maria by the throat.
Jesus tries to grabs the Monster, and is thrown against the wall. Maria wrenches free, and races to open the front door.
Fierce winds suck Maria and Jesus out of the house, where the storm rages.
EXT – FRAME STAGE HOUSE NEXT DOOR – NIGHT
Maria and Jesus run to the shelter of the frame stage home.
Lighting strikes the structure, which flares up immediately.
EXT – FRAME STAGE HOUSES – NIGHT
The two run to the next property, and the next, and the next.
Each time, the structure is incinerated by a lighting strike. But the ferocity wanes with each strike.
EXT – LAST FRAME STAGE HOUSE – NIGHT
Maria and Jesus crouch behind some construction debris in the last remaining structure.
The Monster in the form of a huge apparition appears in the center of the street.
It enters the only remaining structure, and searches for Maria and Jesus.
Maria and Jesus loudly scream the Prayer to St. Michael. They throw rocks and bricks at the apparition.
The Monster grows to enormous proportions, and claws at Maria and Jesus.
Maria throws the crucifix at the Monster, and grabs Jesus’ hand as they run from the structure.
EXT – STREET – NIGHT
A massive blot of lighting hits the structure, and a huge fireball forms.
Both Maria and Jesus are knocked off their feet.
Unearthly screaming of a thousand demons. Then silence.
Maria crawls to her feet. A short distance away is a motionless Jesus. She goes to him, imploring him to wake up. He opens his eyes, and smiles.
Maria helps him up, and they slowly walk away from the smoldering ruins. The rain stops as they walk to their home.
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Eve Williams’ Character Journey Track
“What I learned doing this assignment was that each character experiences and responds to paranormal activity in very different ways. What’s obviously terrifying to adults may not be to children, who tend to be more approachable.”
Character Profile: Maria
1. Role – Survivor/Mama Bear
2. Traits – Somewhat meek when the story opens. Loves her son, her soon to be born baby, in love with Alberto, and wants to make the best home possible for them.
3. Fears – Uncomfortable outside the city; afraid of losing her baby, scared of desert critters and the harsh climate.
4. Wants/Needs – Wants a safe new home. Needs to evict/kill the Monster.
5. Likability/Rooting factors: She’s a mom and is pregnant. She also reacts to the paranormal factors like most of us would.
6. How she reacts under stress: Initially, she denies the paranormal activity. She gets sick to her stomach, she runs away, and then faces the Monster to save her family.
7. Relationship with other characters: She’s Mom. She’s there to love them, comfort them, and protect them.
Character Profile: Jesus
1. Role – Survivor/Little kid.
2. Traits – He’s introverted, and is very nearsighted.
3. Fears – Things that go bump in the night. Things that go bump in the day. And since his eyesight is so back, he fears losing his glasses.
4. Wants/Needs – He’s his Mom’s only chid. But that is soon to change. Jesus fears that the new baby will usurp his place.
5. Likability/Rooting factors: He’s just a quiet little boy who senses the evil in his new house. We want him to have a safe place to grow up.
6. How he reacts under stress: At first, Jesus is curious about the paranormal activity. While he’s not quite sure how to deal with it, he interacts with the poltergeist activity because he’s a kid.
7. Relationship with other characters: He loves his Mom. Jesus isn’t comfortable with Alberto, who is the father of the soon to be born baby.
Character Profile: Bonita
1. Role – Victim/Someone has to die.
2. Traits – Annoying old fat incontinent dog. She barks at anything, everything, and nothing.
3. Fears – Things that go bump in the night. Things that go bump in the day.
4. Wants/Needs – She wants food. Lots of food. She doesn’t need that much food but she figures out a way to get it anyway.
5. Likability/Rooting factors: She’s a dog.
6. How she reacts under stress: She pees on the floor. And barks. A lot.
7. Relationship with other characters: Bonita isn’t a warm and loving dog. She likes food more than people.
Character Profile: Lolita-Bird.
1. Role – Survivor: She senses the Monster before the humans and also gets threatened by the Monster.
2. Traits – She’s a half wild parrot who has a glass breaking jungle yell. She has a limited vocabulary but understands “La Migra” are bad.
3. Fears – Things that go bump in the night. Things that go bump in the day.
4. Wants/Needs – She’s a parrot. She likes fruit and nuts and an occasional finger.
5. Likability/Rooting factors: She’s a pretty green small parrot. She’s loud and smart. For a bird, at least.
6. How she reacts under stress: She jungle yells. And screams “La Migra”. And she tries to bite.
7. Relationship with other characters: Lolita-Bird likes it when she’s noticed. Except by the Monster.
Character Journey: Maria
1. Character Intro – Lost in the truck driving in the middle of the desert.
2. Denial – Sees how Jesus, Bonita, and Lolita-Bird won’t get near the new house.
3. First Reaction to Horror – Dismissive. She decides the Black Eyed Little Boy is a figment of Jesus’ imagination.
4. Response after First Horror – Uneasiness. When she discovers they are alone, she thinks it is Jesus’ coping mechanism to the new home.
5. Relation to Group after First Horror – Mama Bear. She’ll make this out in the middle of no-where a home for all
6. Reaction as Horror Increases – Increasing terror.
7. How They Fight Back – She eventually fights against the Bats, Birds, and the Monster.
8. End Point – Maria and Jesus lure the Monster into the last frame stage home, where the Monster is incinerated by lighting.
9. Insight from death/Survival – She’s conquered the Monster. And now will live in her new home in peace.
Character Journey: Jesus
1. Character Intro – Lost in the truck driving in the middle of the desert.
2. Denial – Along with Bonita ,and Lolita-Bird, Jesus won’t get near the new house. But he doesn’t pick up on the danger of the Black Eyed Little Boy.
3. First Reaction to Horror – Jesus is curious when his toy walks off the shelf.
4. Response after First Horror – Uneasiness but still curious.
5. Relation to Group after First Horror – Not that much different than before. Jesus isn’t being tormented like Maria by the poltergeist activity
6. Reaction as Horror Increases – Jesus understands that something is going on in the house, and while a bit unnerved, is willing to interact with the activity.
7. How They Fight Back – He eventually fights against the Bats, Birds, and the Monster.
8. End Point – Maria and Jesus lure the Monster into the last frame stage home, where the Monster is incinerated by lighting.
9. Insight from death/Survival – They have conquered the Monster. And now will live in their new home in peace.
ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil Established –
Moonless night in the Mojave Desert. Far away from civilization, an older pick-up towing a loaded trailer heads down a deserted road.
Horror Situation: They are lost, and have been for a while.
Reaction: Tired and confused, they consult the map again. Eventually…
The truck’s headlights illuminate a worn sign: El Mirage Heights. Dimly lit homes line the short street.
Connect With the Characters –
Character Intro (Maria and Jesus) –
Inside the truck is Alberto, a worn Hispanic man in his early 30s, Maria, tired and 26, 5 months pregnant; Jesus, coke bottle glasses wearing 5 year old; Bonita a fat old Chihuahua, and Lolita Bird, a vocal green Conure parrot
Horror Situation: Jesus, Bonita, and Lolita Bird sense evil in the house..
Reaction: Jesus won’t come near the house, and Bonita barks and Lolita Bird jungle yells.
Denial (Maria) –
Horror Situation: Jesus, Bonita, and Lolita Bird sense evil in the house. Maria is relieved to find her new house and doesn’t sense the danger.
DEMAND: Apprehension – They should be overjoyed when they reach their new home but why won’t Jesus and the pets go near?
MONSTER REVEAL – Jesus and the pets know there is danger.
Typical tract home; it was the model home for the El Mirage Heights subdivision.
Horror Situation: Alberto proposes to Maria, shoving a key ring with the house keys on her ring finger. In doing so, he scratches her finger, which drops blood.
Reaction: Maria is pleased, but considers the dripping blood a bad sign.
Sheet draped furniture is inside. The group works to grab suitcases and settle in.
Denial of Horror –
Maria says that the house is so far out. Alberto says that she saw the neighbors’ homes and they won’t be alone.
Horror Situation: Alberto attempts to get a cell signal.
Reaction: He locates one while standing in the middle of the street.
Safety Taken Away –
Before dawn, Alberto is picked up by a co-worker. They’re off to Northern Nevada to work construction for a week.
Horror Situation: Jesus hears a knocking at his window. He looks out but sees no one. Then knocking at the front door, where a black eyed little boy stands.
Reaction: Jesus asks Maria if he can let him in. Maria believes it is Alberto, who has forgotten something and tells Jesus to let him in. So he does.
DEMAND: Curiosity – Who knocks at the door so early?
MONSTER REVEAL – The Black Eyed Children are an American contemporary paranormal legend that the Monster can emulate. The Black Eyed boy is only seen outside the house, but Jesus admits he invites him inside.
Horror Situation: Maria quickly dresses and goes to the living room. Confused when she doesn’t see Alberto, Maria asks Jesus where he is.
Reaction: Jesus tells Maria that a little boy was at the door but he left.
Denial (Jesus) –
Jesus doesn’t sense the danger in the Little Black Eyed Boy.
Horror Situation: Maria and Jesus go outside to find the boy’s home. They look down the street and see that the “homes” are actually weathered frame stage homes with false fronts.
Reaction: No one else lives in El Mirage Heights. They are completely alone.
First Reaction/Response after Horror (Maria) –
Given that there are no neighbors, Maria decides that the Black Eyed Boy is a figment of Jesus’ imagination. Or a new imaginary friend.
Relation to Group after First Horror –
This is her new home. Even though it is out in the middle of the Mojave Desert with no known neighbors within miles and miles, she will make it their home.
Monster – The nature of the beast. Most of the monster’s initial actions involve scary nature things, like wild winds and mirages.
Horror Situation: Going from bedroom to bedroom, Maria pounds nails into the wall and hangs crucifixes above the beds. The next time she returns to each room, the crucifixes are turned 90%
Reaction: Unnerved, she carefully straightens each crucifix.
DEMAND: Disconcerting – Moving crucifixes.
MONSTER REVEAL – Poltergeist activity from the Monster.
Horror Situation: Maria takes Bonita out to pee in the backyard. The whipping wind startles the dog, who whimpers and runs back to the door. It also uncovers a stack of bones.
Reaction: Maria examines the bones, attempting to figure out if they are animal or human.
DEMAND: Creepy – Bones buried in the backyard.
MONSTER REVEAL – Something kills things at your new house. Probably the Monster. Or maybe the harsh climate. Or maybe a little of both.
Horror Situation: Maria is unpacking, and hears water from inside the bathroom. Calling for Jesus, she knocks on the closed door. Jesus looks into the hall from his room. When Maria opens the bathroom door, the water runs for a second, then stops.
Reaction: Maria is afraid, but doesn’t want to upset Jesus. She fiddles with the faucet handles, and tells Jesus to make sure the faucet is completely off.
DEMAND: Apprehension – Why and how is the water turning on and off?
MONSTER REVEAL – More unnerving poltergeist activity from the Monster.
Reaction as Horror Increases (Maria) –
Maria is terrorized, but doesn’t want to upset Jesus.
Horror Situation: Jesus carefully places his toys on a shelf, stepping back to admit the display. One slowly moves to the edge of the shelf, teeters, and falls to the floor.
First Reaction to Horror (Jesus) –
More curious than frightened, Jesus doesn’t sense danger.
Reaction: Jesus removes his glasses, wipes the lenses, and puts them on. He picks up the toy and examines it. He places it back on the shelf.
Response after First Horror (Jesus) –
Jesus is a bit on edge, but not really afraid.
Reaction to Group after First Horror (Jesus) –
While Jesus is uneasy, he’s not being tormented by the poltergeist activity.
DEMAND: Unnerving – Did Jesus place the toy too close to the edge of the shelf? Or did it just move and commit toy suicide?
MONSTER REVEAL – More unnerving poltergeist activity from the Monster.
Horror Situation: Maria fitfully dozes on the coach, where she has a nightmare about losing her baby. She wakes up with a start, clutching her stomach. She races to the bathroom and throws up.
Swaying a bit as the stands, she wipes a wet wash cloth on her face. She stares at her reflection in the mirror. And notices a man standing behind her.
Reaction: Maria turns around. No one is there.
DEMAND: Fright – Lots of pregnant women have strange dreams. And many pregnant women throw up. But was there a man in the mirror? Or was this a figment of Maria’s imagination?
MONSTER REVEAL – Maybe Maria just had a nightmare that caused her to vomit. But no, that was caused by the Monster, who has materialized for the first time.
Horror Situation: From her cage in the living room, Lolita Bird watches Bonita who is having a violent nightmare as she sleeps on the kitchen floor. Bonita yips, rolls, and kicks her legs.
A cabinet door slowly opens. Then another. And another. Until all are open. Then all but one shut with a bang. Lolita Bird jungle yells and Bonita wakes up and barks frantically.
Bonita slides across the kitchen floor into the living room. Lolita Bird’s cage shakes violently and the bird yells; “La Migra”!
Reaction: Jesus runs into the living room, and attempts to calm Bonita and Lolita Bird. A creak from the remaining open cabinet door gets Jesus’ attention. He watches as it slams shut.
DEMAND: Fear – WTF is going on? Not even the animals are safe in this place.
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster’s poltergeist activity now has affected every living being in the house.
Reaction as Horror Increases (Jesus) –
Jesus knows that something is going on in the house, but is not truly afraid.
Maria hangs the house key ring on a hook in the kitchen.
Horror Situation: A short time later, she walks by the hook and the keys are gone.
Reaction: She frantically searches the room for the keys. No luck.
Maria and Jesus both go to bed in their respective rooms.
Jesus sleeps in his bed.
Horror Situation: Tapping above his head wakes him. Motionless, he stares up at the wall.
Reaction: Curious, he taps back on the wall.
Horror Situation: Another tap from the wall. Then a battery toy car comes to life, and drives across the floor.
Reaction: Jesus watches the car, then burrows under the sheets.
DEMAND: Unnerving – Maybe Jesus’ response rapping wasn’t such a good idea.
MONSTER REVEAL – I’m here. Let’s play.
Horror Situation: Maria dreams that a monster is chasing her. She flails about in the bed, only waking when she feels something hard and pointed in the bed sheets.
Reaction: Maria stares at her missing keys. Using a cord on the nightstand, she ties the key ring to her wrist.
DEMAND: Unnerving – Maybe Maria had them in her pocket the entire time.
MONSTER DEMAND – Or maybe the Monster just wants to drive her crazy.
ACT 2 – THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated/Trapped
Horror Situation: Maria awakens to the sound of a baby crying.
Reaction: She checks on Jesus, who is soundly sleeping. Then walks into the nursery and gazes into the crib. It is empty.
DEMAND: Tense – Is Maria imaging the crying baby? Is she dreaming?
MONSTER DEMAND – Or is the Monster continuing to torture Maria?
Horror Situation: A music box plays in the nursery.
Reaction: Jesus hears the music, and goes into the nursery. He picks up the music box and turns it off.
Horror Situation: A voice says: Jesus…
Reaction: A confused Jesus answers: Mama?
DEMAND: Curiosity – What is causing this? Clearly, it is not just Maria who is experiencing the phenomena.
MONSTER REVEAL – More poltergeist activity.
Horror Situation: Maria plugs in her cell phone and sets it on the bathroom vanity. When she returns, the charging cord is missing. After a brief search, she finds it in the toilet.
Reaction: Fishing out the cord, she yells for Jesus. When he doesn’t come, she goes to his room. The door is shut. Annoyed, she pauses briefly.
Horror Situation: Muffled voices from inside the room. One is Jesus. But the other?
Reaction: Maria freezes, then places her ear to the door. Brow furrowed, the lilt of the children’s voices confuse her. She knocks, then tries to open the door. It is locked.
Horror Situation: Yelling, Maria pounds on the door. She tries the knob again and walks in to see Jesus sitting on the floor, playing with his toys. Maria asks he who he was talking to. Jesus said “my friend”.
Reaction: Visibly mad, Maria tells Jesus not to lie to her about having a friend. And accuses him of dropping her charging cord in the toilet. Jesus denies knowing anything about the charging cord and says he does too have a friend.
Horror Situation: The crucifix above Jesus’ bed knocks against the wall, beginning a clockwise turn. The crucifix rotates 180 degrees as Jesus and Maria watch.
Reaction: Maria crosses herself, and runs to right the crucifix. It burns her hand and it falls to the floor. Maria clutches her hand and leaves.
Horror Situation: Jesus hears a low whistle. Then another. Jesus calls for his friend. He looks under the bed and sees the black eyed boy staring back at him.
Reaction: Jesus tells the boy he must leave. The boy tells him “you ask me in”.
Horror Situation: Maria’s in the bathroom, washing her reddened hand. The temperature of the water changes from cold to hot and she yanks her hand out of the flow.
Words slowly appear in the steamed mirror. P-E-E-K-A-B-O-O… A dark reflection in the mirror forms behind Maria
Reaction: Maria spins around to see…Nothing. She quickly wipes the mirror. As she leaves the bathroom, a man’s low chuckle…
DEMAND: Dread – Maria’s afraid, but now realizes that she will eventually have to confront whatever is in her house.
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster wants them out and is willing to hurt people to make them GO.
The next day, Maria is in the garage, which is finished out with office space. She discovers El Mirage Heights brochures, with glossy pictures of her house and the partially built others on the cul-de-sac.
A large photo of a grinning man is prominent above the phase “Let Me Take You Home”.
Horror Situation: Maria hears a hiss behind her. A large snake is coiled in the corner of the garage.
Reaction: She grabs a broom and beats the snake. Then notices it is only a rope. Rubbing her eyes, she uses the broom to pull the rope out to see if the snake is under it. At the end of the rope is a hangman’s noose.
Horror Situation: A man’s low chuckle…
Reaction: Maria yells: “This is MY HOUSE”. Stop It!”
DEMAND: Curiosity – So was Maria imagining the snake?
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster is able to shape shift into dangerous things.
The next day, crucifix and Rosary in hand, Maria attempts to cleanse the house.
Horror Situation: Unseen by Maria, a ghostly hand reaches out and brushes Maria’s hair as she passes through the hall.
Reaction: Maria touches her hair, and turns to see no one.
Lolita Bird sleeps in her cage.
Horror Situation: An dark form approaches the cage, which shakes wildly.
Reaction: Lolita Bird jungle yells, attempts to bite the form. Then yells ‘La Migra! La Migra”
DEMAND: Fear – Why won’t these people take a hint and GO? There’s a truck outside, for heaven’s sake.
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster is on the warpath. And is powerful enough to conjure mirages, touch people, torment the bird, and ignore cleansing efforts.
MIDPOINT: The Monster Is Worse Than We Thought!
Horror Situation: Maria is in the backyard, searching for Bonita. She follows footprints leading to a metal shed. It is locked. Trying the smallest key on the key ring secured to her wrist, Maria unlocks the door.
Horror Situation: She opens the door, and suspended cow skull swings past her head. On the concrete floor is a painted pentagram, spent candles, and bones. In the middle of the pentagram is a dead Bonita.
Reaction: Maria screams and runs back to the house.
DEMAND: Terror – Satanic activity in your backyard not a selling point. Who/what killed Bonita?
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster is powerful enough to kill. And won’t stop at your dog.
Horror Situation: That afternoon, inside the house Maria tries to call Alberto. No signal. She wanders through the house, looking for a signal. She goes outside, and tries in various places in the yard.
Reaction: She finally finds two bars, and places the call. No answer but she leaves a frantic voice mail.
Horror Situation: Outside, the desert winds howl and rocks hit the house. And then it is quiet. Maria looks outside and sees her Doppelganger. Who is not pregnant.
Reaction: Maria subconsciously touches her stomach. She looks outside and nothing is there.
In an attempt to keep out the horror, Maria tapes old newspapers she’s found in the house over the windows.
In one newspaper, Maria reads about a developer who committed suicide in the model home of his failed subdivision El Mirage Heights.
Horror Situation: Maria recognizes the man as the one on the brochure and the apparition she’s seen.
DEMAND: Discovery – So the Monster is the developer who killed himself in the house. Which he still considers HIS HOUSE.
MONSTER REVEAL – And the Monster wants them out NOW.
Terrorized –
Horror Situation: Carrying bags, Maria runs to the truck. Jesus follows with Lolita Bird’s cage. Maria fumbles but manages to shove the key in ignition. The truck’s engine catches and the radio blares. Then it sputters and stops.
Maria frantically tries again, starter motor whirs. And again. Then just click, click. Dead battery.
Reaction: Maria steels herself, and gathers up a few bags and Lolita-Bird in her cage. She and Jesus slowly leave the truck.
ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR
Horror Situation: A monstrous wind batters the pair as fight their way back to the home. Lighting stabs, and thunder shakes the earth. A pelting rain begins as they run back to the house. Lighting flashes, illuminating the hanged man in the house’s dormer window.
Reaction: Maria is terrified, and Jesus runs faster to the front door.
Full Pursuit By The Killer –
Once inside the house, Maria and Jesus barricade the doors.
Hysteria –
Horror Situation: Outside, black birds pound the windows; several break their way inside and fly wildly around the room. They are joined by swarms of bats. The power goes out.
Reaction: Maria grabs a broom and swings wildly at the flying creatures. Jesus’ glasses are knocked off and he drops to the floor, reaching out to find them.
DEMAND: Terror – The black birds were bad enough. But BATS TOO?
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster can conjure and/or control animals. And use them to drive all occupants from the house.
How They Fight Back (Maria and Jesus) –
Using all of their strength, Maria and Jesus fight back against the Bats, Birds, and the Monster.
Fight to the Death –
Horror Situation: Banging inside and outside the house. The Monster shows itself as the hanged man, who grabs Maria by the throat.
Reaction: Jesus tries to grabs the Monster, and is thrown against the wall. Maria wrenches free, and races to open the front door.
Horror Situation: Fierce winds suck Maria and Jesus out of the house, where the storm rages.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus run to the shelter of the frame stage home.
Horror Situation: Lighting strikes the structure, which flares up immediately.
Reaction: The two run to the next property, and the next, and the next.
Horror Situation: Each time, the structure is incinerated by a lighting strike. But the ferocity wanes with each strike.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus crouch behind some construction debris in the last remaining structure.
DEMAND: Conflict – Start fighting or everyone will die.
MONSTER REVEAL – The lighting is controlled by the Monster, but his strength is waning…
Resolution –
Horror Situation: The Monster in the form of a huge apparition appears in the center of the street.
It enters the only remaining structure, and searches for Maria and Jesus.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus loudly scream the Prayer to St. Michael. They throw rocks and bricks at the apparition.
DEMAND: Fight – Or die.
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster is coming for them.
Horror Situation: The Monster grows to enormous proportions, and claws at Maria and Jesus.
Reaction: Maria throws the crucifix at the Monster, and grabs Jesus’ hand as they run from the structure.
End Point (Maria and Jesus) –
After Maria and Jesus lure the Monster into the last frame stage house, the Monster is incinerated by lighting.
Horror Situation: A massive blot of lighting hits the structure, and a huge fireball forms.
Reaction: Both Maria and Jesus are knocked off their feet.
Horror Situation: Unearthly screaming of a thousand demons. Then silence.
Reaction: Maria crawls to her feet. A short distance away is a motionless Jesus. She goes to him, imploring him to wake up. He opens his eyes, and smiles.
Maria helps him up, and they slowly walk away from the smoldering ruins. The rain stops as they walk to their home.
Insight from death/Survival (Maria and Jesus) –
With the Monster dead, Maria and Jesus are safe to live happy lives in their new home..
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Eve Williams’ Horror Plot
“What I learned doing this assignment was that a successful paranormal horror story must push the characters to incredible levels of terror before they act.”
My Monster is the failed developer who committed suicide in the model home.
Powers – Varied poltergeist activity; ability to control the weather; conjure animals; create mirages; shape shift.
Limitations – Diminishing power over powerful weather forms.
Weaknesses – Can be destroyed by lighting/fire.
Plan/Purpose/Appetite: The Monster wants his house back. By any means necessary.
ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil Established –
Moonless night in the Mojave Desert. Far away from civilization, an older pick-up towing a loaded trailer heads down a deserted road.
Horror Situation: They are lost, and have been for a while.
Reaction: Tired and confused, they consult the map again. Eventually…
The truck’s headlights illuminate a worn sign: El Mirage Heights. Dimly lit homes line the short street.
Connect With the Characters –
Inside the truck is Alberto, a worn Hispanic man in his early 30s, Maria, tired and 26, 5 months pregnant; Jesus, coke bottle glasses wearing 5 year old; Bonita a fat old Chihuahua, and Lolita Bird, a vocal green Conure parrot
Horror Situation: Jesus, Bonita, and Lolita Bird sense evil in the house.
Reaction: Jesus won’t come near the house, and Bonita barks and Lolita Bird jungle yells.
DEMAND: Apprehension – They should be overjoyed when they reach their new home but why won’t Jesus and the pets go near?
MONSTER REVEAL – Jesus and the pets know there is danger.
Typical tract home; it was the model home for the El Mirage Heights subdivision.
Horror Situation: Alberto proposes to Maria, shoving a key ring with the house keys on her ring finger. In doing so, he scratches her finger, which drops blood.
Reaction: Maria is pleased, but considers the dripping blood a bad sign.
Sheet draped furniture is inside. The group works to grab suitcases and settle in.
Denial of Horror –
Maria says that the house is so far out. Alberto says that she saw the neighbors’ homes and they won’t be alone.
Horror Situation: Alberto attempts to get a cell signal.
Reaction: He locates one while standing in the middle of the street.
Safety Taken Away –
Before dawn, Alberto is picked up by a co-worker. They’re off to Northern Nevada to work construction for a week.
Horror Situation: Jesus hears a knocking at his window. He looks out but sees no one. Then knocking at the front door, where a black eyed little boy stands.
Reaction: Jesus asks Maria if he can let him in. Maria believes it is Alberto, who has forgotten something and tells Jesus to let him in. So he does.
DEMAND: Curiosity – Who knocks at the door so early?
MONSTER REVEAL – The Black Eyed Children are an American contemporary paranormal legend that the Monster can emulate. The Black Eyed boy is only seen outside the house, but Jesus admits he invites him inside.
Horror Situation: Maria quickly dresses and goes to the living room. Confused when she doesn’t see Alberto, Maria asks Jesus where he is.
Reaction: Jesus tells Maria that a little boy was at the door but he left.
Horror Situation: Maria and Jesus go outside to find the boy’s home. They look down the street and see that the “homes” are actually weathered frame stage homes with false fronts.
Reaction: No one else lives in El Mirage Heights. They are completely alone.
Monster –
The nature of the beast. Most of the monster’s initial actions involve scary nature things, like wild winds and mirages.
Horror Situation: Going from bedroom to bedroom, Maria pounds nails into the wall and hangs crucifixes above the beds. The next time she returns to each room, the crucifixes are turned 90%
Reaction: Unnerved, she carefully straightens each crucifix.
DEMAND: Disconcerting – Moving crucifixes.
MONSTER REVEAL – Poltergeist activity from the Monster.
Horror Situation: Maria takes Bonita out to pee in the backyard. The whipping wind startles the dog, who whimpers and runs back to the door. It also uncovers a stack of bones.
Reaction: Maria examines the bones, attempting to figure out if they are animal or human.
DEMAND: Creepy – Bones buried in the backyard.
MONSTER REVEAL – Something kills things at your new house. Probably the Monster. Or maybe the harsh climate. Or maybe a little of both.
Horror Situation: Maria is unpacking, and hears water from inside the bathroom. Calling for Jesus, she knocks on the closed door. Jesus looks into the hall from his room. When Maria opens the bathroom door, the water runs for a second, then stops.
Reaction: Maria is afraid, but doesn’t want to upset Jesus. She fiddles with the faucet handles, and tells Jesus to make sure the faucet is completely off.
DEMAND: Apprehension – Why and how is the water turning on and off?
MONSTER REVEAL – More unnerving poltergeist activity from the Monster.
Horror Situation: Jesus carefully places his toys on a shelf, stepping back to admit the display. One slowly moves to the edge of the shelf, teeters, and falls to the floor.
Reaction: Jesus removes his glasses, wipes the lenses, and puts them on. He picks up the toy and examines it. He places it back on the shelf.
DEMAND: Unnerving – Did Jesus place the toy too close to the edge of the shelf? Or did it just move and commit toy suicide?
MONSTER REVEAL – More unnerving poltergeist activity from the Monster.
Horror Situation: Maria fitfully dozes on the coach, where she has a nightmare about losing her baby. She wakes up with a start, clutching her stomach. She races to the bathroom and throws up.
Swaying a bit as the stands, she wipes a wet wash cloth on her face. She stares at her reflection in the mirror. And notices a man standing behind her.
Reaction: Maria turns around. No one is there.
DEMAND: Fright – Lots of pregnant women have strange dreams. And many pregnant women throw up. But was there a man in the mirror? Or was this a figment of Maria’s imagination?
MONSTER REVEAL – Maybe Maria just had a nightmare that caused her to vomit. But no, that was caused by the Monster, who has materialized for the first time.
Horror Situation: From her cage in the living room, Lolita Bird watches Bonita who is having a violent nightmare as she sleeps on the kitchen floor. Bonita yips, rolls, and kicks her legs.
A cabinet door slowly opens. Then another. And another. Until all are open. Then all but one shut with a bang. Lolita Bird jungle yells and Bonita wakes up and barks frantically.
Bonita slides across the kitchen floor into the living room. Lolita Bird’s cage shakes violently and the bird yells; “La Migra”!
Reaction: Jesus runs into the living room, and attempts to calm Bonita and Lolita Bird. A creak from the remaining open cabinet door gets Jesus’ attention. He watches as it slams shut.
DEMAND: Fear – WTF is going on? Not even the animals are safe in this place.
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster’s poltergeist activity now has affected every living being in the house.
Maria hangs the house key ring on a hook in the kitchen.
Horror Situation: A short time later, she walks by the hook and the keys are gone.
Reaction: She frantically searches the room for the keys. No luck.
Maria and Jesus both go to bed in their respective rooms.
Jesus sleeps in his bed.
Horror Situation: Tapping above his head wakes him. Motionless, he stares up at the wall.
Reaction: Curious, he taps back on the wall.
Horror Situation: Another tap from the wall. Then a battery toy car comes to life, and drives across the floor.
Reaction: Jesus watches the car, then burrows under the sheets.
DEMAND: Unnerving – Maybe Jesus’ response rapping wasn’t such a good idea.
MONSTER REVEAL – I’m here. Let’s play.
Horror Situation: Maria dreams that a monster is chasing her. She flails about in the bed, only waking when she feels something hard and pointed in the bed sheets.
Reaction: Maria stares at her missing keys. Using a cord on the nightstand, she ties the key ring to her wrist.
DEMAND: Unnerving – Maybe Maria had them in her pocket the entire time.
MONSTER DEMAND – Or maybe the Monster just wants to drive her crazy.
ACT 2 – THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated/Trapped
Horror Situation: Maria awakens to the sound of a baby crying.
Reaction: She checks on Jesus, who is soundly sleeping. Then walks into the nursery and gazes into the crib. It is empty.
DEMAND: Tense – Is Maria imaging the crying baby? Is she dreaming?
MONSTER DEMAND – Or is the Monster continuing to torture Maria?
Horror Situation: A music box plays in the nursery.
Reaction: Jesus hears the music, and goes into the nursery. He picks up the music box and turns it off.
Horror Situation: A voice says: Jesus…
Reaction: A confused Jesus answers: Mama?
DEMAND: Curiosity – What is causing this? Clearly, it is not just Maria who is experiencing the phenomena.
MONSTER REVEAL – More poltergeist activity.
Horror Situation: Maria plugs in her cell phone and sets it on the bathroom vanity. When she returns, the charging cord is missing. After a brief search, she finds it in the toilet.
Reaction: Fishing out the cord, she yells for Jesus. When he doesn’t come, she goes to his room. The door is shut. Annoyed, she pauses briefly.
Horror Situation: Muffled voices from inside the room. One is Jesus. But the other?
Reaction: Maria freezes, then places her ear to the door. Brow furrowed, the lilt of the children’s voices confuse her. She knocks, then tries to open the door. It is locked.
Horror Situation: Yelling, Maria pounds on the door. She tries the knob again and walks in to see Jesus sitting on the floor, playing with his toys. Maria asks he who he was talking to. Jesus said “my friend”.
Reaction: Visibly mad, Maria tells Jesus not to lie to her about having a friend. And accuses him of dropping her charging cord in the toilet. Jesus denies knowing anything about the charging cord and says he does too have a friend.
Horror Situation: The crucifix above Jesus’ bed knocks against the wall, beginning a clockwise turn. The crucifix rotates 180 degrees as Jesus and Maria watch.
Reaction: Maria crosses herself, and runs to right the crucifix. It burns her hand and it falls to the floor. Maria clutches her hand and leaves.
Horror Situation: Jesus hears a low whistle. Then another. Jesus calls for his friend. He looks under the bed and sees the black eyed boy staring back at him.
Reaction: Jesus tells the boy he must leave. The boy tells him “you ask me in”.
Horror Situation: Maria’s in the bathroom, washing her reddened hand. The temperature of the water changes from cold to hot and she yanks her hand out of the flow.
Words slowly appear in the steamed mirror. P-E-E-K-A-B-O-O… A dark reflection in the mirror forms behind Maria
Reaction: Maria spins around to see…Nothing. She quickly wipes the mirror. As she leaves the bathroom, a man’s low chuckle…
DEMAND: Dread – Maria’s afraid, but now realizes that she will eventually have to confront whatever is in her house.
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster wants them out and is willing to hurt people to make them GO.
The next day, Maria is in the garage, which is finished out with office space. She discovers El Mirage Heights brochures, with glossy pictures of her house and the partially built others on the cul-de-sac.
A large photo of a grinning man is prominent above the phase “Let Me Take You Home”.
Horror Situation: Maria hears a hiss behind her. A large snake is coiled in the corner of the garage.
Reaction: She grabs a broom and beats the snake. Then notices it is only a rope. Rubbing her eyes, she uses the broom to pull the rope out to see if the snake is under it. At the end of the rope is a hangman’s noose.
Horror Situation: A man’s low chuckle…
Reaction: Maria yells: “This is MY HOUSE”. Stop It!”
DEMAND: Curiosity – So was Maria imagining the snake?
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster is able to shape shift into dangerous things.
The next day, crucifix and Rosary in hand, Maria attempts to cleanse the house.
Horror Situation: Unseen by Maria, a ghostly hand reaches out and brushes Maria’s hair as she passes through the hall.
Reaction: Maria touches her hair, and turns to see no one.
Lolita Bird sleeps in her cage.
Horror Situation: An dark form approaches the cage, which shakes wildly.
Reaction: Lolita Bird jungle yells, attempts to bite the form. Then yells ‘La Migra! La Migra”
DEMAND: Fear – Why won’t these people take a hint and GO? There’s a truck outside, for heaven’s sake.
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster is on the warpath. And is powerful enough to conjure mirages, touch people, torment the bird, and ignore cleansing efforts.
MIDPOINT: The Monster Is Worse Than We Thought!
Horror Situation: Maria is in the backyard, searching for Bonita. She follows footprints leading to a metal shed. It is locked. Trying the smallest key on the key ring secured to her wrist, Maria unlocks the door.
Horror Situation: She opens the door, and suspended cow skull swings past her head. On the concrete floor is a painted pentagram, spent candles, and bones. In the middle of the pentagram is a dead Bonita.
Reaction: Maria screams and runs back to the house.
DEMAND: Terror – Satanic activity in your backyard not a selling point. Who/what killed Bonita?
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster is powerful enough to kill. And won’t stop at your dog.
Horror Situation: That afternoon, inside the house Maria tries to call Alberto. No signal. She wanders through the house, looking for a signal. She goes outside, and tries in various places in the yard.
Reaction: She finally finds two bars, and places the call. No answer but she leaves a frantic voice mail.
Horror Situation: Outside, the desert winds howl and rocks hit the house. And then it is quiet. Maria looks outside and sees her Doppelganger. Who is not pregnant.
Reaction: Maria subconsciously touches her stomach. She looks outside and nothing is there.
In an attempt to keep out the horror, Maria tapes old newspapers she’s found in the house over the windows.
In one newspaper, Maria reads about a developer who committed suicide in the model home of his failed subdivision El Mirage Heights.
Horror Situation: Maria recognizes the man as the one on the brochure and the apparition she’s seen.
DEMAND: Discovery – So the Monster is the developer who killed himself in the house. Which he still considers HIS HOUSE.
MONSTER REVEAL – And the Monster wants them out NOW.
Terrorized –
Horror Situation: Carrying bags, Maria runs to the truck. Jesus follows with Lolita Bird’s cage. Maria fumbles but manages to shove the key in ignition. The truck’s engine catches and the radio blares. Then it sputters and stops.
Maria frantically tries again, starter motor whirs. And again. Then just click, click. Dead battery.
Reaction: Maria steels herself, and gathers up a few bags and Lolita-Bird in her cage. She and Jesus slowly leave the truck.
ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR
Horror Situation: A monstrous wind batters the pair as fight their way back to the home. Lighting stabs, and thunder shakes the earth. A pelting rain begins as they run back to the house. Lighting flashes, illuminating the hanged man in the house’s dormer window.
Reaction: Maria is terrified, and Jesus runs faster to the front door.
Full Pursuit By The Killer –
Once inside the house, Maria and Jesus barricade the doors.
Hysteria –
Horror Situation: Outside, black birds pound the windows; several break their way inside and fly wildly around the room. They are joined by swarms of bats. The power goes out.
Reaction: Maria grabs a broom and swings wildly at the flying creatures. Jesus’ glasses are knocked off and he drops to the floor, reaching out to find them.
DEMAND: Terror – The black birds were bad enough. But BATS TOO?
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster can conjure and/or control animals. And use them to drive all occupants from the house.
Fight to the Death –
Horror Situation: Banging inside and outside the house. The Monster shows itself as the hanged man, who grabs Maria by the throat.
Reaction: Jesus tries to grabs the Monster, and is thrown against the wall. Maria wrenches free, and races to open the front door.
Horror Situation: Fierce winds suck Maria and Jesus out of the house, where the storm rages.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus run to the shelter of the frame stage home.
Horror Situation: Lighting strikes the structure, which flares up immediately.
Reaction: The two run to the next property, and the next, and the next.
Horror Situation: Each time, the structure is incinerated by a lighting strike. But the ferocity wanes with each strike.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus crouch behind some construction debris in the last remaining structure.
DEMAND: Conflict – Start fighting or everyone will die.
MONSTER REVEAL – The lighting is controlled by the Monster, but his strength is waning…
Resolution –
Horror Situation: The Monster in the form of a huge apparition appears in the center of the street.
It enters the only remaining structure, and searches for Maria and Jesus.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus loudly scream the Prayer to St. Michael. They throw rocks and bricks at the apparition.
DEMAND: Fight – Or die.
MONSTER REVEAL – The Monster is coming for them.
Horror Situation: The Monster grows to enormous proportions, and claws at Maria and Jesus.
Reaction: Maria throws the crucifix at the Monster, and grabs Jesus’ hand as they run from the structure.
Horror Situation: A massive blot of lighting hits the structure, and a huge fireball forms.
Reaction: Both Maria and Jesus are knocked off their feet.
Horror Situation: Unearthly screaming of a thousand demons. Then silence.
Reaction: Maria crawls to her feet. A short distance away is a motionless Jesus. She goes to him, imploring him to wake up. He opens his eyes, and smiles.
Maria helps him up, and they slowly walk away from the smoldering ruins. The rain stops as they walk to their home.
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Eve Williams’ Character Death Track
What I learned doing this assignment is that having a very small cast means many less kills.
Character Death 1:
Bonita, the teenaged Chihuahua.
Why: There are only five characters in my story. Alberto leaves within the first ten minutes before the monster action starts so it can’t be him.
That leaves Maria, Jesus and Lolita-Bird.
Maria is necessary to move the story along and also to kill the monster. As well as the fact that leaving a 5 year old marooned in the desert would be a true horror story.
Lolita-Bird is the only other possibility. More people hate parrots than dogs so I’m not sure her death would have a big impact.
Which leaves Bonita. She’s an old, incontinent, yippy yappy Chihuahua and something must be sacrificed to the monster.
How: She’s found in the shed, throat cut, blood drained. Surrounded by blood, bones, candles and wax in the center of the painted pentagram .
This occurs just before the Midpoint of the Story, where it is discovered that the monster is worse than we think.
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Eve Williams’ Horror Plot
“What I learned doing this assignment was I can scare myself.”
ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil Established –
Moonless night in the Mojave Desert. Far away from civilization, an older pick-up towing a loaded trailer heads down a deserted road.
Horror Situation: They are lost, and have been for a while.
Reaction: Tired and confused, they consult the map again. Eventually…
The truck’s headlights illuminate a worn sign: El Mirage Heights. Dimly lit homes line the short street.
Connect With the Characters –
Inside the truck is Alberto, a worn Hispanic man in his early 30s, Maria, tired and 26, 5 months pregnant; Jesus, coke bottle glasses wearing 5 year old; Bonita a fat old Chihuahua, and Lolita Bird, a vocal green Conure parrot
Horror Situation: Jesus, Bonita, and Lolita Bird sense evil in the house
Reaction: Jesus won’t come near the house, and Bonita barks and Lolita Bird jungle yells.
Typical tract home; it was the model home for the El Mirage Heights subdivision.
Horror Situation: Alberto proposes to Maria, shoving a key ring with the house keys on her ring finger. In doing so, he scratches her finger, which drops blood.
Reaction: Maria is pleased, but considers the dripping blood a bad sign.
Sheet draped furniture is inside. The group works to grab suitcases and settle in.
Denial of Horror –
Maria says that the house is so far out. Alberto says that she saw the neighbors’ homes and they won’t be alone.
Horror Situation: Alberto attempts to get a cell signal.
Reaction: He locates one while standing in the middle of the street.
Safety Taken Away –
Before dawn, Alberto is picked up by a co-worker. They’re off to Northern Nevada to work construction for a week.
Horror Situation: Jesus hears a knocking at his window. He looks out but sees no one. Then knocking at the front door, where a black eyed little boy stands.
Reaction: Jesus asks Maria if he can let him in. Maria believes it is Alberto, who has forgotten something and tells Jesus to let him in. So he does.
Horror Situation: Maria quickly dresses and goes to the living room. Confused when she doesn’t see Alberto, Maria asks Jesus where he is.
Reaction: Jesus tells Maria that a little boy was at the door but he left.
Horror Situation: Maria and Jesus go outside to find the boy’s home. They look down the street and see that the “homes” are actually weathered frame stage homes with false fronts.
Reaction: No one else lives in El Mirage Heights. They are completely alone.
Monster –
The nature of the beast. Most of the monster’s initial actions involve scary nature things, like wild winds and mirages.
Horror Situation: Going from bedroom to bedroom, Maria pounds nails into the wall and hangs crucifixes above the beds. The next time she returns to each room, the crucifixes are turned 90%
Reaction: Unnerved, she carefully straightens each crucifix.
Horror Situation: Maria takes Bonita out to pee in the backyard. The whipping wind startles the dog, who whimpers and runs back to the door. It also uncovers a stack of bones.
Reaction: Maria examines the bones, attempting to figure out if they are animal or human.
Horror Situation: Maria is unpacking, and hears water from inside the bathroom. Calling for Jesus, she knocks on the closed door. Jesus looks into the hall from his room. When Maria opens the bathroom door, the water runs for a second, then stops.
Reaction: Maria is afraid, but doesn’t want to upset Jesus. She fiddles with the faucet handles, and tells Jesus to make sure the faucet is completely off.
Horror Situation: Jesus carefully places his toys on a shelf, stepping back to admit the display. One slowly moves to the edge of the shelf, teeters, and falls to the floor.
Reaction: Jesus removes his glasses, wipes the lenses, and puts them on. He picks up the toy and examines it. He places it back on the shelf.
Horror Situation: Maria is dozing on the coach, and wakes up clutching her stomach. She races to the bathroom and throws up. Swaying a bit as the stands, she wipes a wet wash cloth on her face. She stares at her reflection in the mirror. And notices a man standing behind her.
Reaction: Maria turns around. No one is there.
Horror Situation: From her cage in the living room, Lolita Bird watches Bonita who is having a violent nightmare as she sleeps on the kitchen floor. Bonita yips, rolls, and kicks her legs.
A cabinet door slowly opens. Then another. And another. Until all are open. Then all but one shut with a bang. Lolita Bird jungle yells and Bonita wakes up and barks frantically.
Bonita slides across the kitchen floor into the living room. Lolita Bird’s cage shakes violently and the bird yells; “La Migra”!
Reaction: Jesus runs into the living room, and attempts to calm Bonita and Lolita Bird. A creak from the remaining open cabinet door gets Jesus’ attention. He watches as it slams shut.
Maria hangs the house key ring on a hook in the kitchen.
Horror Situation: A short time later, she walks by the hook and the keys are gone.
Reaction: She frantically searches the room for the keys. No luck.
Maria and Jesus both go to bed in their respective rooms.
Jesus sleeps in his bed.
Horror Situation: Tapping above his head wakes him. Motionless, he stares up at the wall.
Reaction: Curious, he taps back on the wall.
Horror Situation: Another tap from the wall. Then a battery toy car comes to life, and drives across the floor.
Horror Situation: Maria dreams that a monster is chasing her. She flails about in the bed, only waking when she feels something hard and pointed in the bed sheets.
Reaction: Maria stares at her missing keys. Using a cord on the nightstand, she ties the key ring to her wrist.
ACT 2 – THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated/Trapped
Horror Situation: Maria awakens to the sound of a baby crying.
Reaction: She checks on Jesus, who is soundly sleeping.
Horror Situation: A music box plays in the nursery.
Reaction: Jesus hears the music, and goes into the nursery. He picks up the music box and turns it off.
Horror Situation: A voice says: Jesus…
Reaction: A confused Jesus answers: Mama?
Horror Situation: Maria plugs in her cell phone and sets it on the bathroom vanity. When she returns, the charging cord is missing. After a brief search, she finds it in the toilet.
Reaction: Fishing out the cord, she yells for Jesus. When he doesn’t come, she goes to his room. The door is shut. Annoyed, she pauses briefly.
Horror Situation: Muffled voices from inside the room. One is Jesus. But the other?
Reaction: Maria freezes, then places her ear to the door. Brow furrowed, the lilt of the children’s voices confuse her. She knocks, then tries to open the door. It is locked.
Horror Situation: Yelling, Maria pounds on the door. She tries the knob again and walks in to see Jesus sitting on the floor, playing with his toys. Maria asks he who he was talking to. Jesus said “my friend”.
Reaction: Visibly mad, Maria tells Jesus not to lie to her about having a friend. And accuses him of dropping her charging cord in the toilet. Jesus denies knowing anything about the charging cord and says he does too have a friend.
Horror Situation: The crucifix above Jesus’ bed knocks against the wall, beginning a clockwise turn. The crucifix rotates 180 degrees as Jesus and Maria watch.
Reaction: Maria crosses herself, and runs to right the crucifix. It burns her hand and it falls to the floor. Maria clutches her hand and leaves.
Horror Situation: Jesus hears a low whistle. Then another. Jesus calls for his friend. He looks under the bed and sees the black eyed boy staring back at him.
Reaction: Jesus tells the boy he must leave. The boy tells him “you ask me in”.
Horror Situation: Maria’s in the bathroom, washing her reddened hand. The temperature of the water changes from cold to hot and she yanks her hand out of the flow.
Words slowly appear in the steamed mirror. P-E-E-K-A-B-O-O… A dark reflection in the mirror forms behind Maria
Reaction: Maria spins around to see…Nothing. She quickly wipes the mirror. As she leaves the bathroom, a man’s low chuckle…
The next day, Maria is in the garage, which is finished out with office space. She discovers El Mirage Heights brochures, with glossy pictures of her house and the partially built others on the cul-de-sac.
A large photo of a grinning man is prominent above the phase “Let Me Take You Home”.
Horror Situation: Maria hears a hiss behind her. A large snake is coiled in the corner of the garage.
Reaction: She grabs a broom and beats the snake. Then notices it is only a rope. Rubbing her eyes, she uses the broom to pull the rope out to see if the snake is under it. At the end of the rope is a hangman’s noose.
Horror Situation: A man’s low chuckle…
Reaction: Maria yells: “This is MY HOUSE”. Stop It!”
The next day, crucifix and Rosary in hand, Maria attempts to cleanse the house.
Horror Situation: Unseen by Maria, a ghostly hand reaches out and brushes Maria’s hair as she passes through the hall.
Reaction: Maria touches her hair, and turns to see no one.
Lolita Bird sleeps in her cage.
Horror Situation: An dark form approaches the cage, which shakes wildly.
Reaction: Lolita Bird jungle yells, attempts to bite the form. Then yells ‘La Migra! La Migra”
MIDPOINT: The Monster Is Worse Than We Thought!
Horror Situation: Maria is in the backyard, searching for Bonita. She follows footprints leading to a metal shed. It is locked. Trying the smallest key on the key ring secured to her wrist, Maria unlocks the door.
Horror Situation: She opens the door, and suspended cow skull swings past her head. On the concrete floor is a painted pentagram, spent candles, and bones. In the middle of the pentagram is a dead Bonita.
Reaction: Maria screams and runs back to the house.
Horror Situation: That afternoon, inside the house Maria tries to call Alberto. No signal. She wanders through the house, looking for a signal. She goes outside, and tries in various places in the yard.
Reaction: She finally finds two bars, and places the call. No answer but she leaves a frantic voice mail.
Horror Situation: Outside, the desert winds howl and rocks hit the house. And then it is quiet. Maria looks outside and sees her doppelganger. Who is not pregnant.
Reaction: Maria subconsciously touches her stomach. She looks outside and nothing is there.
In an attempt to keep out the horror, Maria tapes old newspapers she’s found in the house over the windows.
In one newspaper, Maria reads about a developer who committed suicide in the model home of his failed subdivision El Mirage Heights.
Horror Situation: Maria recognizes the man as the one on the brochure and the apparition she’s seen.
Terrorized –
Horror Situation: Carrying bags, Maria runs to the truck. Jesus follows with Lolita Bird’s cage. Maria fumbles but manages to shove the key in ignition. The truck’s engine catches and the radio blares. Then it sputters and stops.
Maria frantically tries again, starter motor whirs. And again. Then just click, click. Dead battery.
Reaction: Maria steels herself, and gathers up a few bags and Lolita-Bird in her cage. She and Jesus slowly leave the truck.
ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR
Horror Situation: A monstrous wind batters the pair as fight their way back to the home. Lighting stabs, and thunder shakes the earth. A pelting rain begins as they run back to the house. Lighting flashes, illuminating the hanged man in the house’s dormer window.
Reaction: Maria is terrified, and Jesus runs faster to the front door.
Full Pursuit By The Killer –
Once inside the house, Maria and Jesus barricade the doors.
Hysteria –
Horror Situation: Outside, black birds pound the windows; several break their way inside and fly wildly around the room. They are joined by swarms of bats. The power goes out.
Reaction: Maria grabs a broom and swings wildly at the flying creatures. Jesus’ glasses are knocked off and he drops to the floor, reaching out to find them.
Fight to the Death –
Horror Situation: Banging inside and outside the house. The Monster shows itself as the hanged man, who grabs Maria by the throat.
Reaction: Jesus tries to grabs the Monster, and is thrown against the wall. Maria wrenches free, and races to open the front door.
Horror Situation: Fierce winds suck Maria and Jesus out of the house, where the storm rages.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus run to the shelter of the frame stage home.
Horror Situation: Lighting strikes the structure, which flares up immediately.
Reaction: The two run to the next property, and the next, and the next.
Horror Situation: Each time, the structure is incinerated by a lighting strike. But the ferocity wanes with each strike.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus crouch behind some construction debris in the last remaining structure.
Resolution –
Horror Situation: The Monster in the form of a huge apparition appears in the center of the street.
It enters the only remaining structure, and searches for Maria and Jesus.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus loudly scream the Prayer to St. Michael. They throw rocks and bricks at the apparition.
Horror Situation: The Monster grows to enormous proportions, and lunges and claws at Maria and Jesus.
Reaction: Maria and Jesus run from the structure.
Horror Situation: A massive blot of lighting hits the structure, and a huge fireball forms.
Reaction: Both Maria and Jesus are knocked off their feet.
Horror Situation: Unearthly screaming of a thousand demons. Then silence.
Reaction: Maria crawls to her feet. A short distance away is a motionless Jesus. She goes to him, imploring him to wake up. He opens his eyes, and smiles.
Maria helps him up, and they slowly walk away from the smoldering ruins. The rain stops as they walk to their home.
-
Eve Williams’ Horror Plot
“What I learned doing this assignment was the ending to my story.”
ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil Established –
Moonless night in the Mojave Desert. Far away from civilization, an older pick-up towing a loaded trailer heads down a deserted road. The truck’s headlights illuminate a worn sign: El Mirage Heights. Dimly lit homes line the short street.
Connect With the Characters –
Inside the truck is Alberto, a worn Hispanic man in his early 30s, Maria, tired and 26, 5 months pregnant; Jesus, coke bottle glasses wearing 5 year old; Bonita a fat old Chihuahua, and Lolita Bird, a vocal green Conure parrot
Typical tract home; it was the model home for the El Mirage Heights subdivision. Sheet draped furniture is inside. The group works to grab suitcases and settle in.
Denial of Horror –
Maria says that the house is so far out. Alberto says that she saw the neighbors’ homes and they won’t be alone. And cell service is difficult, but standing in the street may lead to success.
Safety Taken Away –
Before dawn, Alberto is picked up by a co-worker. They’re off to Northern Nevada to work construction for a week.
Maria goes outside. Under the bright desert sun, she looks down the street and sees that the homes are unfinished. They have no neighbors.
Monster –
The nature of the beast. Most of the monster’s initial actions involve scary nature things, like wild winds and mirages
Poltergeist activity in the house includes water turning on and off, scratching, knocking, whistles, knocking, muffled music, and the sounds of a baby crying. Things disappear and reappear in different rooms.
Maria and Jesus are baffled and frightened as they experience the phenomenon. Maria’s baby is kicking more than usual, and she attempts to remain calm.
ACT 2 – THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated/Trapped
The next day, cross and Rosary in hand, Maria attempts to cleanse the house. The lack of blowback pleases Maria.
Maria and Jesus continue to unpack.
After a bit, the desert winds howl and rocks hit the house. And then it is quiet.
Maria looks outside and sees Jesus. Then turns around and sees Jesus. Another look outside and she sees her doppelganger.
That afternoon, Maria tries to call Alberto. No signal.
After failed attempts in the house, a wary Maria stands near the center of the street.
Two bars on the phone and the call is placed. No answer but she leaves a frantic voice mail.
Maria is in the backyard, searching for Bonita. She follows footprints leading to a metal shed
She opens the door, and suspended cow skull swings past her head.
On the concrete floor is a painted pentagram, spent candles, and bones. In the middle of the pentagram is a dead Bonita.
MIDPOINT: The Monster Is Worse Than We Thought!
Terrorized –
Carrying suitcases,, Maria runs to the truck. Jesus follows with Lolita Bird’s cage. Maria fumbles but manages to shove the key in ignition. The truck’s engine catches and the radio blares. Then it sputters and stops.
Maria frantically tries again, starter motor whirs. And again. Then just click, click.
Dead battery.
ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR
A monstrous wind batters the pair as fight their way back to the home. Lighting stabs, and thunder shakes the earth. The rain begins.
As they run back to the house, the apparition of a hanged man appears house’s dormer window.
Full Pursuit By The Killer –
Once inside the house, Maria and Jesus barricade the doors.
Hysteria –
Outside, black birds pound the windows; several break their way inside and fly wildly around the room. They are joined by swarms of bats. The power goes out.
Fight to the Death –
Banging inside and outside the house. The Monster shows itself as the hanged man, who grabs Maria by the throat. Jesus tries to grabs the Monster, and is thrown against the wall.
Maria wrenches free, and races to open the front door. Fierce winds suck Maria and Jesus out of the house.
They run to the shelter of the partially built home. Lighting strikes the structure, which flares up immediately. The two run to the next property, and the next, and the next.
Each time, the structure is incinerated by a lighting strike. But the ferocity wanes with each strike.
Maria and Jesus crouch behind some construction debris in the last remaining structure.
Resolution –
The Monster in the form of a huge apparition appears in the center of the street.
It enters the only remaining structure, and searches for Maria and Jesus. Maria and Jesus taunt the creature with rocks, bricks, and Bible verses
The Monster grows to enormous proportions, and Maria and Jesus run from the structure.
A massive blot of lighting hits the structure, and a huge fireball forms.
Unearthly screaming of a thousand demons. Then silence.
In the middle of the street stand Maria and Jesus. The rain stops as they walk home.
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Subject line: Eve Williams’ Characters for Horror
What I learned doing this assignment is each character reacts differently to the increasing paranormal activity; their actions accelerate the story.
1. Tell us your Concept and the Group you have chosen.
The chosen ones include Maria, pregnant woman; Jesus, her 5 year old son, the dog and the parrot.
2. Tell us the Dying Pattern of this movie.
Maria and Jesus will live, but be scared to death for much of the second half of the movie.
The dog’s gonna die.
The parrot will escape.
3. Give us an Identity and a sentence for each character that makes up your group.
Leader: Maria. A typical Mother, she will fiercely fight for her son and unborn baby. Initially overjoyed at her new house, she quickly realizes they are trapped.
Innocent: Jesus, who is a sensitive. Children are more receptive to the paranormal, and Jesus can see and sense things much quicker than his mother.
Out of Control/Obnoxious: The dog. Nippy and incontinent at the best of times, the dog triggers at any and all noises, and what appears to be nothing at all.
Monster Bait: The parrot. Lolita bird’s vocabulary includes a variety of foul Spanglish. She senses the evil in the house, and calls it “La Migra”.
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Subject line: Eve Williams’ Terrifying Monster
“What I learned doing this assignment is…?” Keep it simple. I initially thought that I’d have a variety of entities scaring my main characters but it’s better to have one multi-tasking monster.
And not everything that goes bump in the night (or day) is paranormal. Howling winds, strange creatures, mirages, and the abject emptiness of the desert are unnerving for most people.
1. Tell us what or who your monster is. My monster is an elemental related to the earth. An elemental originates from the earth, but can attach itself to humans.
Elementals are referenced in the Bible, and are most prevalent in the UK.
2. Give us a few sentences for each of the following for your monster:
Their Terror: The ability to shape shift into animal or human.
It also can mimic a particular human or animal. By appearance and by sound.
It can manifest as a mirage. Or a doppelganger.
It can cause poltergeist activity. And attack people.
Their Mystery: Elementals are not alive, and have not ever lived. They are one of the four components primary elements: earth, fire, water, or air. But they draw power from earth forces, the dead, and living people.
Their Fear Provoking Appearance: Less often seen than sensed. They can shape shift into many things, including Black eyed children, dogs or coyotes, or manifest into fierce winds, storms,
Their Rules: Initial contact with the living is subtle. The monster slowly accelerates the action through paranormal activity until the living flee. Those who don’t flee are in mortal danger.
Their Mythology: The elemental was created with the earth, and was dormant until man started building and defiling their home. My monster was content with Native American’s minimal modification of the land, but angered when a developer began grading and constructing infrastructure and homes.
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Subject line: THE NUN Horror Conventions
5. What I learned doing this assignment is that repeated horror sequences – The Nun popping into virtually every scene in the second half of the movie – become comical rather than scary. The myriad of demon nuns and Satan’s minions at the end of the movie were confusing, in that most marched around and presented no real danger to the main characters. .
2/4 Concepts –
Terrorize the Characters – Father Burke’s failed fatal exorcism of young Daniel . Sister Irene shut trapped the Abbey walls. Father Burke buried alive. Frenchie faced to fight demons and possessed nuns inside the abbey.
Isolation – Remote cloistered abbey in 1952 Romania.
Death – Father Burke buried alive, bitten by poisonous snakes, propelled against the stone walls and floors of the abbey.
Sister Irene nearly strangled, drowned, thrown against the abbey walls and floor,
Frenchie: Terrorized by vipers, thrown against the stone walls and floors of the abbey, gets the shit beat out of him.
All the nuns are dead at the end of the movie.
Monster/Villain: Demom Valak “The Nun” character; assorted demons, vipers,
High Tension: Father Burke, Sister Irene, and Frenchy are trapped in the abbey and leaving is very difficult, if not impossible.
Departure from Reality: Just about everything in the last third of the movie. Generally starts out rooted in reality but high budget special effects at the end tended to detract from the story.
Moral Statement: Finish what you started. Sister Irene is constantly reminded that she hasn’t taken her vows, and Father Burke has guilt over the failed exorcism of Daniel. Frenchie remains in the nearby village for no real reason other than life doesn’t require much from him there.
3. The Nun isn’t a great horror film. It’s entertaining but the plot is muddy, sloppy, and at times, the characters are forced to explain rather than show the how and why.
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Horror Concept: Dream first home in a remote desert outpost becomes a nightmare when a pregnant woman and her young son are tormented by elemental forces and conjured spirits.
A. monster/villain – The Mojave desert and the spirits within
B Broad daylight terror related to mirages during the day and wicked desert winds at night. As well as black eyed children, who may or may not be there, elemental spirits, and whatever was conjured by Satanic rituals performed in the house.
C Location is the only completed house in the El Mirage subdivision located 10 miles from California City and 7 miles from the closest known neighbor.
D Victims: Maria, twenty-five, 5 months pregnant; her 20-200/visually impaired 5 year old son Jesus; .Bonita, a fat incontinent teenaged Chihuahua; and Lolita, a potty- mouth Conjure parrot.
Primal Fears:
Fear of the dark.
Fear of the light (mirages or real?)
Fear something terrible will happen.
Fear she’ll lose her baby.
Fear of the unseen.
Fear of the desert creatures.
Fear of death.
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Good Afternoon:
Should we post our pre-course work with the four elements?
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As a member of this group, I, Eve Williams, agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
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1) My name is Eve Williams. I live in Northridge.
2) I’ve written five scripts. Over probably 20 years. Nothing in the past 14 or so years.
3 I appraise commercial real estate; my profession takes me to strange places that many appraisers won’t go near. I’m always thinking of some terrifying thing that could happen while I’m out in the middle of nowhere. While none of my other scripts have been horror, I’m fascinated by really bad things that can happen to unexpecting normal people. I want to write low budge horror since that’s where my mind goes these days.
4) November 2010, I was appraising a number of raw land parcels in the Jawbone Canyon area (northwest of Mojave, southeast of Bakersfield – west of Hwy 395). I pulled off the dirt path to dodge some motorcyclists and got stuck. No cell service, five or six miles to the nearest campsite. And the home of bears, mountain lions, snakes, and other critters. Other critters being the meth head tweakers who set up shop to cook in remote desert locales.
So I’m in my truck, cold – I’m in shorts – and really pissed. Royally Pissed. I have work to do. My clients, the Navy and the Nature Conservancy would not be pleased if the appraisal is late since the appraiser managed to get stuck in her truck on Butterbredt Road.
It is quiet. And dark, except for thousands of bright stars. So quiet out there that the jets at 15,000 feet headed to LAX are quite audible. After I while, I need to go to the bathroom and get out of the truck, and walk down the path. I don’t want to pee near my truck since that might attract a bear or lion.
I look east toward China Lake and noticed lights popping up and down near the horizon line. Up down. Sidewalks. Up down. Sidewalks very very fast. Then UP. Then DOWN. Then SIDEWAYS. At 45 degree angles. Obviously some type of helicopter. Doing things that helicopters don’t do. Way too fast, and those crazy angles. And then it hit me. The helicopters were SILENT. Oh, shit. I’m gonna get anal probbed.
They disappeared after a bit which made me feel better. Although I wouldn’t hear them if they headed my way. Morning came and I blocked the first motorcyclists who came down the path. With their help, I was soon free. But what the Hell did I see? Silent helicopters? That did crazy ass maneuvers? Really? A fair amount of my clients believed my story. But for the next several months, I wondered exactly what I DID see.
And then the May 2011 raid of Bin Laden. People said that there’s no way that helicopters could get that close to the compound without discovery. And I said: “not if they are silent” I saw the Silent Helicopters that took out Bin Laden.
And didn’t get eaten or anal probed.