[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry's Horror Outline Version Two

What I learned is the inter-dimensional part of my story didn't work. I changed the that aspect of the creature to manifest from shadows. I also changed the ending to accommodate the change from using a portal.

Title: Terror on Calvary Mountain

Concept:
When college friends set search for an abandoned Calvary encampment and mistakenly disturb an Indian burial ground, they are trapped and terrorized by a giant, malevolent creature from the spirit world.

ACT 1
1 EXT. CALVARY ENCAMPMENT. DUSK
Three U.S. Calvary soldiers are running for their lives through the woods. Their faces are gripped with terror. Suddenly, with a flash, one soldier disappears, then a second soldiers disappears. The last soldier makes it back to the encampment and tries to enter the watchtower. The gate is locked. He screams at someone to let him in. He just begins to scream, and we see blood splash on the side of the gate. We hear him gurgling and the creature lets out an ear-piercing scream.

Horror Situation: Calvary soldiers are being chased by something large. It catches them and kills them one at a time.

Note: Opening Scene

Horror Map:
Creepy Moment: Foggy, dark forest.
Apprehension: Soldiers are looking for something. Their rifles are ready.
Surprise: Loud cracking noise nearby startles them.
Terror: They see the creature, but we can’t.
Panic: They start shooting their rifles and it doesn’t stop the creature. The panic and run.
Terror: One soldier is killed
Release: Second soldier falls to the ground. He tripped on a stump but it is ok.
Terror: As soon as the fallen soldier starts running again, he is killed.
Panic: The last soldier makes it to the gate, but can’t open it.
Dread: The creature reaches him. He has his back to the creature and slowly turns
Terror: He gets killed
Creepy Moment: Blood splashes on the fence along with claw marks from the creature.

2 EXT. HOUSE DRIVEWAY. DAY
Introducing characters. They are loading the vehicle for a trip.

Alex, the leader, is loading backpacks into the vehicle. They discuss going on the trip. He tells Meghann, the Moral One, about he and his dad spending time hiking in the woods and mentions rumors of big, hairy monsters being seen in the woods.

Beth, the Rule Breaker, arrives carrying her backpack. She starts to put her backpack in the vehicle when Chad, the Obnoxious One, jumps out from under a blanket and scares her. She screams and punches him.

Bennie, the Complainer, is the last one to arrive. The others are already aggravated with him for making them wait. He makes excuses and blames his lateness on someone else.

3 EXT. NASHOBA’S HOUSE. DAY
Nashoba, the introvert, is outside helping his elderly Grandmother move items in her yard as the others pull up in the vehicle.
Nashoba’s elderly Native American Grandmother warns them they are going near sacred ground and about the Shampe, the
Hairy Man. Shampe is the Choctaw word for Bigfoot. She cautions them not to go.
The Grandmother gives Nashoba a necklace with spiritual meaning and urges him to keep the item with him for protection

4 INT. VEHICLE. DAY
Alex assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about. Chad adds that the old lady is crazy. Nashoba warns him not to anger the spirits. Chad scoffs at him. Meghann agrees with Alex and angrily tells Chad the woman and Nashoba aren’t crazy. She tells him to be quiet. He rolls his eyes.
Bennie tries to convince himself that there is nothing to worry about. He complains that he didn’t want to go on this trip in the first place. He farts and gags the others. He tells them he ate cheese enchiladas and forgot to take his lactose pills.

5 EXT. WOODS. DAY
They get lost. They lose their sense of direction. Chad and Beth tease Alex for getting lost since he’s supposed to be a big woodsman.
Chad argues with Alex about the correct direction to proceed. Meghann jumps in to play peacemaker.

6 EXT. WOODS. LATER
There is movement in the trees. Meghann sees a figure, but then it is gone. No one else sees it.

7 EXT. WOODS. MOMENTS LATER
A clump of gray animal hair clings to a branch 7 feet off the ground.

8 EXT. INDIAN BURIAL GROUND. DUSK
They smell something with such a horrible stench, they blame Bennie.
They discover an Indian Burial marker. Chad throws it into the woods.

9 EXT.NASHOBA’S GRANDMOTHER’S HOUSE.DUSK
The Grandmother looks up to the sky. She says something in Choctaw. Then in English, “The spirits are angry.”

10 EXT. WOODS. SIMULTANEOUSLY
From the Creature’s POV, it can see them.

11 EXT.WOODS-SWINGING BRIDGE.DAY
They cross a rickety, swinging bridge over a steep ravine. They argue about crossing because it looks dangerous. They begin crossing the bridge that has missing boards. As the first-person crosses, a board breaks, and they almost fall. As the last two cross, we see the bridge about to give way and collapse. Just as they are almost to the end, the bridge collapses. They grab part of the bridge and hold on. They are dangling over the ravine’s edge with a high ledge. The others scramble to pull them to safety. They are now isolated.

12 EXT. ABANDONED CALVARY ENCAMPMENT. DAY
They see a tall fence constructed of tree trunks. It’s grown over and abandoned. They begin to move closer. Suddenly, they hear loud snapping of tree branches. They freeze and listen. They hear more branches cracking and getting closer. They rush to the fence and look for an opening. They find a gate and tear away the overgrowth. As the gate is cleared, they see signs of the previous horror, blood splatter, deep claw marks, etc. The creature lets out a loud scream. They frantically try to open the gate. They can’t get it open. The sound is getting closer. They finally can pull the gate open enough to get inside.

Horror Situation: Something is after them. They see signs of previous terror as they find a way into the encampment.

Note: First Turning Point

Horror Map:
Apprehension: They are nervous about going inside the spooky environment.
Creepy Moment: The encampment fence is overgrown, dark, and spooky.
Fear: They hear branches breaking nearby.
Panic: They desperately try to get inside.
Fear: They uncover a portion of the fence with blood splatter and claw marks. They hear the creature scream (howl).

13 INT. ENCAMPMENT. DAY
They push the gate shut and find a pole to help barricade the gate.

14 EXT. ENCAMPMENT. SIMULTANEOUSLY
From the creatures POV. It’s looking at the gate.

ACT 2
15 INT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Trapped inside the encampment with the creature outside. They look for a way inside one of the buildings behind the fence. Only two buildings and a watchtower near the main gate are still standing. Other buildings have collapsed. They find a way in one of the buildings and look for a way to secure the door.

Bennie starts to break down in fear. They argue again about what to do next.

Meghann peaks outside through a window and thinks she sees the creature. They look again and all they see is shadows. The others are in denial and don’t believe her.

16 EXT. WOODS. NIGHT
We see the legs of the creature walking along the fence line.

17 INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They hear the creature outside pounding against the fence and snorting. They hide inside and talk quietly.

18 INT. ENCAMPMENT.LATER
Beth ventures by herself into a different room using her cell phone for light. Her battery dies and she’s in the dark. She falls through the floor.

19 INT. HIDDEN ROOM. NIGHT
Beth lies on the floor as the others run to her rescue. She finds a lantern. Bennie throws her a lighter. The others look at him confused and he pulls out his weed. She finds old TNT and flares. They make a human ladder and pull her out.

20 INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Chad to leave, others want to move to the watchtower. Beth agrees to go with him.

21 EXT.WOODS. NIGHT (MIDPOINT)
Chad and Beth exit the encampment building. They walk cautiously, scanning the surrounds. Chad opens the gate and they exit. They leave the gate ajar.
The monster stalks them. they can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and blood splashes on Beth’s face. She panics and runs back to the encampment. She leaves the gate ajar.

Horror Situation: Chad and Beth leave the encampment to seek safety on their own. Chad gets killed.

Horror Map:
Apprehension: They scan the area looking for the creature.
Fear: They leave the gate ajar.
Creepy Moment: The creature is watching them.
Fear: They hear the creature growling and snapping branches.
Anxiety: They can’t tell which direction the sound is coming from.
Suspense: The noise stops, but they still don’t see anything.
Horror: Alex is backing up as he scans. He runs into the creature and is killed.
Panic: Beth face is splattered with blood. She screams and starts running.
Fear: She hears the creature behind her. She enters the compound, but leaves the gate ajar. The creature disappears through the portal.

22 INT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Those remaining react to the sight of Beth’s bloody appearance and Chad’s death.

23 EXT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
The creature enters the encampment through the open gate.

24 INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT (2nd TP)
They smell the same stench from earlier. They still wonder what the smell is. The others tease Bennie again. Bennie is angry and moves away from the others and sits near a window. The creature smashes through the window and pulls him out. They hear him screaming and gurgling before going silent. Monster Reveal: We see the full creature. They light a flare pointing it at the creature and it retreats.

Horror Situation: Creature pulls Bennie out of the window and kills him.

Horror Map: 2nd TP Scene
Apprehension: They smell the bad smell again. What is it?
Creepy Moment: The creature is lurking outside
Fear: Bennie sits near the window.
Creepy Moment: There is a crack in the window.
Suspense: Everyone is talking and are unaware that the creature is nearby.
Fear: Bennie sits by the window
Creepy Moment: The creature is getting closer to the window. We see the crack.
Suspense: Bennie sits quietly. The others talk.
Shock: The creature's arm crashes through the window.
Terror: Bennie is pulled through the window.
Panic: The other scream and scramble to hide.
Fear: They hear Bennie screaming outside.
Creepy Moment: We see Bennies dead, bloody body.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR

25 INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Nashoba is calm, withdraws, and looks at his spiritual item. Beth is trembling and in shock. Alex goes into action to barricade the opening.

Meghann screams. She eventually regains control of herself and impatiently urges Beth to calm down and help.

26 INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Alex decides on a new plan to move to the watchtower.

EXT. GRANDMOTHER’S HOUSE. NIGHT
She is performing a spiritual ritual and speaks in Choctaw asking the spirits to protect the group of friends.

27 EXT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They begin moving to the watchtower using flares as protection. Alex protects the others and is the last to go. His flare is extinguished. He tries to light another one but fails. There is suspense as he tries to light another flare. He begins to panic and runs towards the watchtower. The creature grabs his legs and pulls him away. He screams and the others are watching him being brutally killed.

Horror Situation: The characters are attempting to move to a safer location. Alex is the last to go. His flare burns out and his is killed.

Apprehension: Alex climbs through the broken window and is outside. Beth doesn’t want to go.
Creepy Moment: They see Bennies dead body.
Panic: Nashoba can’t open the Watchtower door.
Monster Reveal: The creature appears again through the portal.
Fear: Alex’s flare goes out.
Panic: He can’t light another one.
Fear: The creature is getting closer.
Horror: Alex is pulled away by his legs and killed.
Hysteria: The girls become hysterical, not able to control their emotions.
Creepy Moment: Alex is still breathing. Blood squirts out of his mouth. He dies.

28 INT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
They react to the horror. Meghann comes up with a new plan to lure the creature to the explosives.

29 EXT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
The monster circles the watchtower, pounding on the walls. Then stops. It moves away from the building and turns into a shadow and disappears.

30 INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They think the creature is gone. Meghann rallies everyone to put her plan into place. They climb down into the lower level of the watchtower. They hesitate, look anxiously at each other, light flares and leave.

31 EXT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
The monster is going after Meghann. Nashoba tries to distract the monster away from Meghann. The monster swipes its claw at her ripping her skin as blood flies. It slams Meghann across the room. She’s hurt and not moving. The monster slowly starts towards her, when Nashoba screams at it as he moves toward the trap. The monster leaps at him and they both fall into the trap. The building explodes.

Beth is traumatized, but alive. Beth is holding a flare. She begins to scream obscenities toward the monster. The monster emerges from the fire and kills Beth. The creature looks toward Meghann, she appears to be dead. It leaves. As soon as it’s gone, Meghann moves. She’s alive.

Horror Situation: They lead the creature to the TNT. Nashoba throw a flare onto the TNT and blows the building up, killing them. Monster emerges to kill Beth. Meghann survives.

Note: Climax

Horror Map:
Apprehension: They leave the safety of the watchtower not knowing where the monster is located.
Monster Reveal: The creature appears through a shadow. The full creature is visible.
Fear: The creature is coming after them.
Panic: Beth abandons her role in the plan, she runs and hides
Suspense: Meghann and Nashoba each hold flares, it keeps the creature at bay for now
Terror: Meghann tries to lure the creature to the TNT; it knocks her into the building causing a partial collapse on top of her. She’s injured and appears to be dead.
Fear: The creature turns to Nashoba.
Suspense: Nashoba uses the flare to keep the creature back while he positions himself near the TNT.
Terror: The creature leaps at Nashoba and they both fall through the floor on top of the TNT. The burning flare ignites the TNT, and the building explodes killing them.
Shock: Beth leaves her hiding spot and taunts the creature. It emerges from the fire, it’s not dead, and kills her. The creature looks in the direction of Meghann, walks into a shadow, and disappears. Once the creature is gone, Meghann moves and is alive.

32 INT.AMBULANCE.LATER
Paramedics load Meghann into an ambulance on a stretcher. She has bandages on her head and is wearing an oxygen mask. We hear the police scanner saying they’ve found another body. The paramedics shut the ambulance door. Meghann turns her head toward the window. In the edge of the woods, shadows start to move and dozens of the creatures are watching her. She starts to scream and shake her head violently. They paramedics hold her down and give her a shot to calm her down. The paramedics don’t see the other creatures.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 1 week ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Would anyone like to exchange feedback? email me at barryrdurbin@yahoo.com

Title: Terror on Calvary Mountain

Concept:
When college friends set search for an abandoned Calvary encampment and mistakenly disturb an Indian burial ground, they are trapped and terrorized by a giant, malevolent creature from the spirit world.

ACT 1

EXT. CALVARY ENCAMPMENT. DUSK
Three U.S. Calvary soldiers are running for their lives through the woods. Their faces are gripped with terror. Suddenly, with a flash, one soldier disappears, then a second soldiers disappears. The last soldier makes it back to the encampment and tries to enter the watchtower. The gate is locked. He screams at someone to let him in. He just begins to scream, and we see blood splash on the side of the gate. We hear him gurgling and the creature lets out an ear-piercing scream.

Horror Situation: Calvary soldiers are being chased by something large. It catches them and kills them one at a time.

Note: Opening Scene

Horror Map:
Creepy Moment: Foggy, dark forest.
Apprehension: Soldiers are looking for something. Their rifles are ready.
Surprise: Loud cracking noise nearby startles them.
Terror: They see the creature, but we can’t.
Panic: They start shooting their rifles and it doesn’t stop the creature. The panic and run.
Terror: One soldier is killed
Release: Second soldier falls to the ground. He tripped on a stump but it is ok.
Terror: As soon as the fallen soldier starts running again, he is killed.
Panic: The last soldier makes it to the gate, but can’t open it.
Dread: The creature reaches him. He has his back to the creature and slowly turns
Terror:
He gets killed
Creepy Moment: Blood splashes on the fence along with claw marks from the creature.

EXT. HOUSE DRIVEWAY. DAY
Introduce characters. They are loading the vehicle for a trip.

Alex, the leader, is loading backpacks into the vehicle. They discuss going on the trip. He tells Meghann, the Moral One, about he and his dad spending time hiking in the woods and mentions rumors of big, hairy monsters being seen in the woods.

Beth, the Rule Breaker, arrives carrying her backpack. She starts to put her backpack in the vehicle when Chad, the Obnoxious One, jumps out from under a blanket and scares her. She screams and punches him.

Bennie, the Complainer, is the last one to arrive. The others are already aggravated with him for making them wait. He makes excuses and blames his lateness on someone else.

EXT. NASHOBA’S HOUSE. DAY
Nashoba, the introvert, is outside helping his elderly Grandmother move items in her yard as the others pull up in the vehicle.

Nashoba’s elderly Native American Grandmother warns them they are going near sacred ground and about the Shampe, the Hairy Man. Shampe is the Choctaw word for Bigfoot. She cautions them not to go.
The Grandmother gives Nashoba a necklace with spiritual meaning and urges him to keep the item with him for protection

INT. VEHICLE. DAY
Alex assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about. Chad adds that the old lady is crazy. Nashoba warns him not to anger the spirits. Chad scoffs at him. Meghann agrees with Alex and angrily tells Chad the woman and Nashoba aren’t crazy. She tells him to be quiet. He rolls his eyes.
Bennie tries to convince himself that there is nothing to worry about. He complains that he didn’t want to go on this trip in the first place. He farts and gags the others. He tells them he ate cheese enchiladas and forgot to take his lactose pills.

EXT. WOODS. DAY
They get lost. They lose their sense of direction. Chad and Beth tease Alex for getting lost since he’s supposed to be a big woodsman.

Chad argues with Alex about the correct direction to proceed. Meghann jumps in to play peacemaker.

EXT. WOODS. LATER
There is movement in the trees. Meghann sees a figure, but then it is gone. No one else sees it.

EXT. WOODS. MOMENTS LATER
A clump of gray animal hair clings to a branch 7 feet off the ground.

EXT. INDIAN BURIAL GROUND. DUSK
They smell something with such a horrible stench, they blame Bennie.
They discover an Indian Burial marker. Chad throws it into the woods.

EXT.NASHOBA’S GRANDMOTHER’S HOUSE.DUSK
The Grandmother looks up to the sky. She says something in Choctaw. Then in English, “The spirits are angry.”

EXT. WOODS. SIMULTANEOUSLY
The creature appears through an inter-dimensional portal. From the Creature’s POV, it can see them.

EXT.WOODS-SWINGING BRIDGE.DAY
They cross a rickety, swinging bridge over a steep ravine. They argue about crossing because it looks dangerous. They begin crossing the bridge that has missing boards. As the first-person crosses, a board breaks, and they almost fall. As the last two cross, we see the bridge about to give way and collapse. Just as they are almost to the end, the bridge collapses. They grab part of the bridge and hold on. They are dangling over the ravine’s edge with a high ledge. The others scramble to pull them to safety. They are now isolated.

EXT. ABANDONED CALVARY ENCAMPMENT. DAY
They see a tall fence constructed of tree trunks. It’s grown over and abandoned. They begin to move closer. Suddenly, they hear loud snapping of tree branches. They freeze and listen. They hear more branches cracking and getting closer. They rush to the fence and look for an opening. They find a gate and tear away the overgrowth. As the gate is cleared, they see signs of the previous horror, blood splatter, deep claw marks, etc. The creature lets out a loud scream. They frantically try to open the gate. They can’t get it open. The sound is getting closer. They finally can pull the gate open enough to get inside.

Horror Situation: Something is after them. They see signs of previous terror as they find a way into the encampment.

Note: First Turning Point

Horror Map:
Apprehension: They are nervous about going inside the spooky environment.
Creepy Moment: The encampment fence is overgrown, dark, and spooky.
Fear: They hear branches breaking nearby.
Panic: They desperately try to get inside.
Fear: They uncover a portion of the fence with blood splatter and claw marks. They hear the creature scream (howl).

INT. ENCAMPMENT. DAY
They push the gate shut and find a pole to help barricade the gate.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. SIMULTANEOUSLY
From the creatures POV. It’s looking at the gate.

ACT 2
INT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Trapped inside the encampment with the creature outside. They look for a way inside one of the buildings behind the fence. Only two buildings and a watchtower near the main gate are still standing. Other buildings have collapsed. They find a way in one of the buildings and look for a way to secure the door.

Bennie starts to break down in fear. They argue again about what to do next.

Meghann peaks outside through a window and thinks she sees the creature. No one else can see anything. The others are in denial and don’t believe her.

EXT. WOODS. NIGHT
We see the legs of the creature walking through an inter-dimensional portal and along the fence line.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They hear the creature outside pounding against the fence and snorting. They hide inside and talk quietly.

INT. ENCAMPMENT.LATER
Beth ventures by herself into a different room using her cell phone for light. Her battery dies and she’s in the dark. She falls through the floor.

INT. HIDDEN ROOM. NIGHT
Beth lies on the floor as the others run to her rescue. She finds a lantern. Bennie throws her a lighter. The others look at him confused and he pulls out his weed. She finds old TNT and flares. They make a human ladder and pull her out.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Chad to leave, others want to move to the watchtower. Beth agrees to go with him.

EXT.WOODS. NIGHT (MIDPOINT)
Chad and Beth exit the encampment building. They walk cautiously, scanning the surrounds. Chad opens the gate and they exit. They leave the gate ajar.

The monster stalks them. they can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and blood splashes on Beth’s face. She panics and runs back to the encampment. She leaves the gate ajar.

Horror Situation: Chad and Beth leave the encampment to seek safety on their own. Chad gets killed.
Horror Map:
Apprehension: They scan the area looking for the creature.
Fear: They leave the gate ajar.
Creepy Moment: The creature is watching them.
Fear: They hear the creature growling and snapping branches.
Anxiety: They can’t tell which direction the sound is coming from.
Suspense: The noise stops, but they still don’t see anything.
Horror: Alex is backing up as he scans. He runs into the creature and is killed.
Panic: Beth face is splattered with blood. She screams and starts running.
Fear: She hears the creature behind her. She enters the compound, but leaves the gate ajar. The creature disappears through the portal.

INT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Those remaining react to the sight of Beth’s bloody appearance and Chad’s death.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
The creature enters the encampment through the open gate.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT (2nd TP)
Horror Situation: Creature pulls Bennie out of the window and kills him.

Horror Map: 2nd TP Scene
Apprehension: They smell the bad smell again. What is it?
Creepy Moment: The creature is lurking outside
Fear: Bennie sits near the window.
Creepy Moment: There is a crack in the window.
Suspense: Everyone is talking and are unaware that the creature is nearby.
Fear: Bennie sits by the window
Creepy Moment: The creature is getting closer to the window. We see the crack.
Suspense: Bennie sits quietly. The others talk.
Shock: The creature's arm crashes through the window.
Terror: Bennie is pulled through the window.
Panic: The other scream and scramble to hide.
Fear: They hear Bennie screaming outside.
Creepy Moment: We see Bennies dead, bloody body.

They smell the same stench from earlier. They still wonder what the smell is. The others tease Bennie again. Bennie is angry and moves away from the others and sits near a window. The creature smashes through the window and pulls him out. They hear him screaming and gurgling before going silent. Monster Reveal: We see the full creature. They light a flare pointing it at the creature and it retreats through the portal.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Nashoba is calm, withdraws, and looks at his spiritual item. Beth is trembling and in shock. Alex goes into action to barricade the opening.
Meghann screams. She eventually regains control of herself and impatiently urges Beth to calm down and help.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Alex decides on a new plan to move to the watchtower.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They begin moving to the watchtower using flares as protection. Alex protects the others and is the last to go. His flare is extinguished. He tries to light another one, but fails. There is suspense as he tries to light another flare. He begins to panic and runs towards the watchtower. The creature grabs his legs and pulls him away. He screams and the others are watching him being brutally killed.

Horror Situation: The characters are attempting to move to a safer location. Alex is the last to go. His flare burns out and his is killed.
Apprehension: Alex climbs through the broken window and is outside. Beth doesn’t want to go.
Creepy Moment: They see Bennies dead body.
Panic: Nashoba can’t open the Watchtower door.
Monster Reveal: The creature appears again through the portal.
Fear: Alex’s flare goes out.
Panic: He can’t light another one.
Fear: The creature is getting closer.
Horror: Alex is pulled away by his legs and killed.
Hysteria: The girls become hysterical, not able to control their emotions.
Creepy Moment: Alex is still breathing. Blood squirts out of his mouth. He dies.

INT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
They react to the horror. Meghann comes up with a new plan to lure the creature to the explosives.

EXT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
The monster circles the watchtower, pounding on the walls. Then stops.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
She rallies everyone to put her plan into place. The light flares and leave.

EXT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
The monster is going after Meghann. Nashoba tries to distract the monster away from Meghann. The monster swipes its claw at her ripping her skin as blood flies. It slams Meghann across the room. She’s hurt and not moving. The monster slowly starts towards her, when Nashoba screams at it as he moves toward the trap. The monster leaps at him and they both fall into the trap. The building explodes.

Beth is traumatized, but alive. Beth is holding a flare. She begins to scream obscenities toward the monster. The monster emerges from the fire and kills Beth. The creature looks toward Meghann, she appears to be dead. It leaves. As soon as it’s gone, Meghann moves. She’s alive. We see police helicopters flying overhead.

Horror Situation: They lead the creature to the TNT. Nashoba throw a flare onto the TNT and blows the building up, killing them. Monster emerges to kill Beth. Meghann survives.
Note: Climax
Horror Map:
Apprehension: They leave the safety of the watchtower not knowing where the monster is located.
Monster Reveal: The creature enters through the portal. The full creature is visible.
Fear: The creature is coming after them.
Panic: Beth abandons her role in the plan, she runs and hides
Suspense: Meghann and Nashoba each hold flares, it keeps the creature at bay for now
Terror: Meghann tries to lure the creature to the TNT, it knocks her into the building causing a partial collapse on top of her. She’s injured and appears to be dead.
Fear: The creature turns to Nashoba.
Suspense: Nashoba uses the flare to keep the creature back while he positions himself near the TNT.
Terror: The creature lunges at Nashoba and they both fall through the floor on top of the TNT. The burning flare ignites the TNT and the building explodes killing them.
Shock: Beth taunts the creature. It emerges from the fire and kills her. The creature leaves. Meghann moves and is alive.

EXT.MONSTER’S WORLD.NIGHT
The creature steps through the portal into a world with many more of his species.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 1 week ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Horror Outline Version 1

What I learned is that my turning points needed to be elevated.

Title: Terror on Calvary Mountain

Concept:
When college friends set search for an abandoned Calvary encampment and mistakenly disturb an Indian burial ground, they are trapped and terrorized by a giant, malevolent creature from the spirit world.

ACT 1
EXT. CALVARY ENCAMPMENT. DUSK
Three U.S. Calvary soldiers are running for their lives through the woods. Their faces are gripped with terror. Suddenly, with a flash, one soldier disappears, then a second soldiers disappears. The last soldier makes it back to the encampment and tries to enter the watchtower. The gate is locked. He screams at someone to let him in. He just begins to scream, and we see blood splash on the side of the gate. We hear him gurgling and the creature lets out an ear-piercing scream.

Horror Situation: Calvary soldiers are being chased by something large. It catches them and kills them one at a time.

Note: Opening Scene

Horror Map:
Creepy Moment: Foggy, dark forest.
Apprehension: Soldiers are looking for something. Their rifles are ready.
Surprise: Loud cracking noise nearby startles them.
Terror: They see the creature, but we can’t.
Panic: They start shooting their rifles and it doesn’t stop the creature. The panic and run.
Terror: One soldier is killed
Release: Second soldier falls to the ground. He tripped on a stump but it is ok.
Terror: As soon as the fallen soldier starts running again, he is killed.
Panic: The last soldier makes it to the gate, but can’t open it.
Dread: The creature reaches him. He has his back to the creature and slowly turns
Terror: He gets killed
Creepy Moment: Blood splashes on the fence along with claw marks from the creature.

EXT. HOUSE DRIVEWAY. DAY
Introduce characters. They are loading the vehicle for a trip.

Alex, the leader, is loading backpacks into the vehicle. They discuss going on the trip. He tells Meghann, the Moral One, about he and his dad spending time hiking in the woods and mentions rumors of big, hairy monsters being seen in the woods.

Beth, the Rule Breaker, arrives carrying her backpack. She starts to put her backpack in the vehicle when Chad, the Obnoxious One, jumps out from under a blanket and scares her. She screams and punches him.

Bennie, the Complainer, is the last one to arrive. The others are already aggravated with him for making them wait. He makes excuses and blames his lateness on someone else.

EXT. NASHOBA’S HOUSE. DAY
Nashoba, the introvert, is outside helping his elderly Grandmother move items in her yard as the others pull up in the vehicle.

Nashoba’s elderly Native American Grandmother warns them they are going near sacred ground and about the Shampe, the Hairy Man. Shampe is the Choctaw word for Bigfoot. She cautions them not to go.

The Grandmother gives Nashoba a necklace with spiritual meaning and urges him to keep the item with him for protection

INT. VEHICLE. DAY
Alex assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about. Chad adds that the old lady is crazy. Nashoba warns him not to anger the spirits. Chad scoffs at him. Meghann agrees with Alex and angrily tells Chad the woman and Nashoba aren’t crazy. She tells him to be quiet. He rolls his eyes.
Bennie tries to convince himself that there is nothing to worry about. He complains that he didn’t want to go on this trip in the first place. He farts and gags the others. He tells them he ate cheese enchiladas and forgot to take his lactose pills.

EXT. WOODS. DAY
They get lost. They lose their sense of direction. Chad and Beth tease Alex for getting lost since he’s supposed to be a big woodsman.
Chad argues with Alex about the correct direction to proceed. Meghann jumps in to play peacemaker.

EXT. WOODS. LATER
There is movement in the trees. Meghann sees a figure, but then it is gone. No one else sees it.

EXT. WOODS. MOMENTS LATER
A clump of gray animal hair clings to a branch 7 feet off the ground.

EXT. INDIAN BURIAL GROUND. DUSK
They smell something with such a horrible stench, they blame Bennie.
They discover an Indian Burial marker. Chad throws it into the woods.

EXT.NASHOBA’S GRANDMOTHER’S HOUSE.DUSK
The Grandmother looks up to the sky. She says something in Choctaw. Then in English, “The spirits are angry.”

EXT. WOODS. SIMULTANEOUSLY
The creature appears through an inter-dimensional portal. From the Creature’s POV, it can see them.

EXT.WOODS-SWINGING BRIDGE.DAY
They cross a rickety, swinging bridge over a steep ravine. They argue about crossing because it looks dangerous. They begin crossing the bridge that has missing boards. As the first-person crosses, a board breaks, and they almost fall. As the last two cross, we see the bridge about to give way and collapse. Just as they are almost to the end, the bridge collapses. They grab part of the bridge and hold on. They are dangling over the ravine’s edge with a high ledge. The others scramble to pull them to safety. They are now isolated.

EXT. ABANDONED CALVARY ENCAMPMENT. DAY
They see a tall fence constructed of tree trunks. It’s grown over and abandoned. They begin to move closer. Suddenly, they hear loud snapping of tree branches. They freeze and listen. They hear more branches cracking and getting closer. They rush to the fence and look for an opening. They find a gate and tear away the overgrowth. As the gate is cleared, they see signs of the previous horror, blood splatter, deep claw marks, etc. The creature lets out a loud scream. They frantically try to open the gate. They can’t get it open. The sound is getting closer. They finally can pull the gate open enough to get inside.

Horror Situation: Something is after them. They see signs of previous terror as they find a way into the encampment.

Note: First Turning Point

Horror Map:
Apprehension: They are nervous about going inside the spooky environment.
Creepy Moment: The encampment fence is overgrown, dark, and spooky.
Fear: They hear branches breaking nearby.
Panic: They desperately try to get inside.
Fear: They uncover a portion of the fence with blood splatter and claw marks. They hear the creature scream (howl).

INT. ENCAMPMENT. DAY
They push the gate shut and find a pole to help barricade the gate.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. SIMULTANEOUSLY
From the creatures POV. It’s looking at the gate.

ACT 2
INT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Trapped inside the encampment with the creature outside. They look for a way inside one of the buildings behind the fence. Only two buildings and a watchtower near the main gate are still standing. Other buildings have collapsed. They find a way in one of the buildings and look for a way to secure the door.
Bennie starts to break down in fear. They argue again about what to do next.
Meghann peaks outside through a window and thinks she sees the creature. No one else can see anything. The others are in denial and don’t believe her.

EXT. WOODS. NIGHT
We see the legs of the creature walking through an inter-dimensional portal and along the fence line.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They hear the creature outside pounding against the fence and snorting. They hide inside and talk quietly.

INT. ENCAMPMENT.LATER
Beth ventures by herself into a different room using her cell phone for light. Her battery dies and she’s in the dark. She falls through the floor.

INT. HIDDEN ROOM. NIGHT
Beth lies on the floor as the others run to her rescue. She finds a lantern. Bennie throws her a lighter. The others look at him confused and he pulls out his weed. She finds old TNT and flares. They make a human ladder and pull her out.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Chad to leave, others want to move to the watchtower. Beth agrees to go with him.

EXT.WOODS. NIGHT (MIDPOINT)
Chad and Beth exit the encampment building. They walk cautiously, scanning the surrounds. Chad opens the gate and they exit. They leave the gate ajar.
The monster stalks them. they can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and blood splashes on Beth’s face. She panics and runs back to the encampment. She leaves the gate ajar.

Horror Situation: Chad and Beth leave the encampment to seek safety on their own. Chad gets killed.

Horror Map:
Apprehension: They scan the area looking for the creature.
Fear: They leave the gate ajar.
Creepy Moment: The creature is watching them.
Fear: They hear the creature growling and snapping branches.
Anxiety: They can’t tell which direction the sound is coming from.
Suspense: The noise stops, but they still don’t see anything.
Horror: Alex is backing up as he scans. He runs into the creature and is killed.
Panic: Beth face is splattered with blood. She screams and starts running.
Fear: She hears the creature behind her. She enters the compound, but leaves the gate ajar. The creature disappears through the portal.

INT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Those remaining react to the sight of Beth’s bloody appearance and Chad’s death.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
The creature enters the encampment through the open gate.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT (2nd TP)
Horror Situation: Creature pulls Bennie out of the window and kills him.

Horror Map: 2nd TP Scene
Apprehension: They smell the bad smell again. What is it?
Creepy Moment: The creature is lurking outside
Fear: Bennie sits near the window.
Creepy Moment: There is a crack in the window.
Suspense: Everyone is talking and are unaware that the creature is nearby.
Fear: Bennie sits by the window
Creepy Moment: The creature is getting closer to the window. We see the crack.
Suspense: Bennie sits quietly. The others talk.
Shock: The creature's arm crashes through the window.
Terror: Bennie is pulled through the window.
Panic: The other scream and scramble to hide.
Fear: They hear Bennie screaming outside.
Creepy Moment: We see Bennies dead, bloody body.

They smell the same stench from earlier. They still wonder what the smell is. The others tease Bennie again. Bennie is angry and moves away from the others and sits near a window. The creature smashes through the window and pulls him out. They hear him screaming and gurgling before going silent. Monster Reveal: We see the full creature. They light a flare pointing it at the creature and it retreats through the portal.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Nashoba is calm, withdraws, and looks at his spiritual item. Beth is trembling and in shock. Alex goes into action to barricade the opening.
Meghann screams. She eventually regains control of herself and impatiently urges Beth to calm down and help.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Alex decides on a new plan to move to the watchtower.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They begin moving to the watchtower using flares as protection. Alex protects the others and is the last to go. His flare is extinguished. He tries to light another one, but fails. There is suspense as he tries to light another flare. He begins to panic and runs towards the watchtower. The creature grabs his legs and pulls him away. He screams and the others are watching him being brutally killed.

Horror Situation: The characters are attempting to move to a safer location. Alex is the last to go. His flare burns out and his is killed.
Apprehension: Alex climbs through the broken window and is outside. Beth doesn’t want to go.
Creepy Moment: They see Bennies dead body.
Panic: Nashoba can’t open the Watchtower door.
Monster Reveal: The creature appears again through the portal.
Fear: Alex’s flare goes out.
Panic: He can’t light another one.
Fear: The creature is getting closer.
Horror: Alex is pulled away by his legs and killed.
Hysteria: The girls become hysterical, not able to control their emotions.
Creepy Moment: Alex is still breathing. Blood squirts out of his mouth. He dies.

INT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
They react to the horror. Meghann comes up with a new plan to lure the creature to the explosives.

EXT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
The monster circles the watchtower, pounding on the walls. Then stops.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
She rallies everyone to put her plan into place. The light flares and leave.

EXT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
The monster is going after Meghann. Nashoba tries to distract the monster away from Meghann. The monster swipes its claw at her ripping her skin as blood flies. It slams Meghann across the room. She’s hurt and not moving. The monster slowly starts towards her, when Nashoba screams at it as he moves toward the trap. The monster leaps at him and they both fall into the trap. The building explodes.
Beth is traumatized, but alive. Beth is holding a flare. She begins to scream obscenities toward the monster. The monster emerges from the fire and kills Beth. The creature looks toward Meghann, she appears to be dead. It leaves. As soon as it’s gone, Meghann moves. She’s alive. We see police helicopters flying overhead.

Horror Situation: They lead the creature to the TNT. Nashoba throw a flare onto the TNT and blows the building up, killing them. Monster emerges to kill Beth. Meghann survives.
Note: Climax
Horror Map:
Apprehension: They leave the safety of the watchtower not knowing where the monster is located.
Monster Reveal: The creature enters through the portal. The full creature is visible.
Fear: The creature is coming after them.
Panic: Beth abandons her role in the plan, she runs and hides
Suspense: Meghann and Nashoba each hold flares, it keeps the creature at bay for now
Terror: Meghann tries to lure the creature to the TNT, it knocks her into the building causing a partial collapse on top of her. She’s injured and appears to be dead.
Fear: The creature turns to Nashoba.
Suspense: Nashoba uses the flare to keep the creature back while he positions himself near the TNT.
Terror: The creature lunges at Nashoba and they both fall through the floor on top of the TNT. The burning flare ignites the TNT and the building explodes killing them.
Shock: Beth taunts the creature. It emerges from the fire and kills her. The creature leaves. Meghann moves and is alive.

EXT.MONSTER’S WORLD.NIGHT
The creature steps through the portal into a world with many more of his species.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 1 week ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry's Scary as Hell Scene

What I learned doing this assignment is how to add many horror elements to a scene to elevate the horror.

Horror Situation: The creature breaks through a window and pulls Bennie outside and kills him.

Horror Map:
Apprehension: They smell the bad smell again. What is it?
Creepy Moment: The creature is lurking outside
Fear: Bennie sits near the window.
Creepy Moment: There is a crack in the window.
Suspense: Everyone is talking and are unaware that the creature is nearby.
Fear: Bennie sits by the window
Creepy Moment: The creature is getting closer to the window. We see the crack.
Suspense: Bennie sits quietly. The others talk.
Shock: The creature's arm crashes through the window.
Terror: Bennie is pulled through the window.
Panic: The other scream and scramble to hide.
Fear: They hear Bennie screaming outside.
Creepy Moment: We see Bennies dead, bloody body.

Note: This is the Second Turning Point.

INT. ENCAMPMENT – NIGHT
The group sits in an interior room without windows. Alex paces around the room. There is tension in the room.

ALEX
Everyone keep your flares ready. Bennie, give me your lighter.

BENNIE
Dude, it’s the only one I have.

The group groans at his response.

ALEX
That’s the only we have to light the flares, DUDE! Give it here.

Bennie rolls his eyes, takes a deep breath, and pulls his lighter out of his pants pocket and tosses it to Alex.

ALEX
Thanks.

Bennie waves him off without speaking and turns his head away from Alex. Beth makes a sour face. The others do the same.

BETH
There’s that smell again. What in the hell is that?

She looks at Bennie.

BETH
Is that another one of your lactose farts Bennie? Gross!

Bennie jumps up angrily. The others laugh.

BENNIE
I told you it’s not me! Fuck off.

Bennie storms out of the room. He plops down on the floor against the exterior wall, adjacent to a window that has a large crack.

MEGHANN
Come on Bennie. We’re just teasing. Come back in here. It’s safer away from the window.

Bennie flips her off.

MEGHANN
Oh, well.

Bennie sits, sulking.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT – CONTINUOUS
A thump is heard coming from inside the building. From the creature’s POV, it turns toward the direction of the sound and sees the cracked window.

INT. ENCAMPMENT – MOMENTS LATER
Nashoba, Meghann, and Beth sit in the interior room. They occasionally peak around the corner at Bennie who sits sulking, head down. Alex continues to pace.

NASHOBA
The spirits are angry. They don’t want us here.

ALEX
It’s a little late for that now.

NASHOBA
We should have listened to my Grandmother. She speaks of giant, hairy creatures from the spirit world that are the protectors of our people.

BETH
Giant, hairy creatures? Why didn’t you tell us this before?

Suddenly, BANG! The girls jump and scream. Another BANG is heard. They peak around the corner and Bennie is banging the back of his head against the wall.

MEGHANN
Bennie! Cut it out.

BETH
What the hell man?

Bennie snarls at them.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT – CONTINUOUS
The creatures legs are visible waling along the building they are sitting inside.

INT. ENCAMPMENT – MOMENTS LATER
Closer shot of Bennie sitting near the window with the crack visible.
The others are calm and relaxed.

ALEX
Let’s just stick together and we can leave after daybreak.

Nashoba clutches his necklace. He looks up and speaks in his native Choctaw language.

MEGHANN
What does that mean?

NASHOBA
I was asking the spirits to protect us.

Meghann looks up and does the sign of the cross.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT – CONTINUOUS
From behind, the creature is moving closer to the window. Close view of the window crack.

INT. ENCAMPMENT – MOMENTS LATER
Bennie remains sitting by the window, head down, and quiet. He bangs the back of his head against the wall one more time.

The others get up and move toward Bennie.

ALEX
Come on dude! Cut it out.

The room goes silent. Suddenly, CRASH! The creature’s arm crashes through the window. It grabs Bennie and pulls him out the window. Glass flies across the room. The all scream and jump back into the other room.

MEGHANN
Bennie! NOOOO!

Bennie is screaming in agony. Alex runs to the broken window and looks outside. The creature is standing over Bennie. It looks up at him.

MEGHANN
Alex, get back. What are you doing?

Alex pulls out the lighter and lights the flare, holds it out the window, and jumps outside. The others are frozen in fear.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT – MOMENTS LATER
Alex stands facing the creature holding the flare with his are extended. The creature stands up and moves away from Bennie. We see the full creature now. Its mouth is dripping with blood. Its eyes are covered with long hair, but long, sharp teeth and claws. Its shoulder span is as wide as two or three men. It towers over Alex.

ALEX
Get the fuck out of here.

The creature stands still. It doesn’t advance towards Alex. The two stare each other down. Alex waves the flare at the creature. It reacts and steps back.

ALEX
Go on. Get out of here. Leave us the hell alone you beast from hell.

Alex waves the flare more vigorously at the creature. The creature lets out a loud, aggressive sounding growl. Alex take out a second flare and lights it with the burning flare. He steps toward the creature and throws a flare at the creature hitting it in the chest. Its thick fur catches on fire.
The creature screams and begins beating the flames. It flails around for a few seconds and manages to extinguish the flames. It makes eye contact with Alex. It turns around and walks through a portal and disappears.

ALEX
Where the hell did it go?

He runs over to Bennie. He’s dead.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

EXT. WOODS – DUSK
Only a glimmer of light remains. The sky is gray and gloomy. Three U.S. Calvary soldiers, spread apart, move cautiously ahead with their rifles at the ready. Their breaths are visible in the cold air. One soldier is slightly ahead of the others in formation. He raises his hand for the others to stop.

2ND SOLDIER
What is it?

He motions for quiet. He listens intently. He gives the go ahead to move forward. A few moments later, a loud cracking sound is heard. The soldiers are startled and freeze. They slowly look at each other, then toward the direction of the sound. There is silence. Suddenly, a large shadow engulfs the soldiers. They step back with rifles aimed straight ahead.

1ST SOLDIER
Fire!

All three fire their rifles as they move backwards. The shadow continues to move with them. The fire more rounds. IT doesn’t stop.

2ND SOLDIER
Oh shit! Run!

They turn and run. They are dodging trees and branches as they run. The fog from their breath becomes heavier as they run.

1ST SOLDIER
Hurry. We’re almost there.

Cracking tree branches are heard. A deep howling growl can be heard getting closer. Suddenly, a flash of movement sweeps across the screen and the 1st Soldier disappears.

2ND SOLDIER
What the hell is that thing?

The remaining two soldiers continue to run, dodging branches. A branch slaps one in the face.

3RD SOLDIER
Ouch!

He continues to run. His breath creates a heavy fog.

2ND SOLDIER
Come on. Let’s…

Suddenly, the 2nd soldier falls to the ground. A grunt is heard. He is laying on the ground in front of a fallen branch. He jumps up and is breathing heavy.

2ND SOLDIER
Where did it go?

Suddenly, we see another flash of movement just as he starts running again. He disappears. His cries of pain is hear briefly and stops suddenly.

3RD SOLDIER
Please make it.

The last remaining soldier continues to run frantically. He sees a fence constructed of poles or small tree trunks.
Branches are heard breaking along with the deep growl.
He reaches the fence gate. A U.S. Calvary insignia is on the gate. He can’t open the gate.

3RD SOLDIER
Open you son-of-a-bitch. Help, let me in.

The shadow now engulfs him. He turns around toward the creature. He takes off his hat anc clutches it against his chest. He is frozen. He slowly slides down the fence to a sitting position on the ground. He’s trembling and shaking head head back-and-forth.

3RD SOLDIER
No, no, no.

He is sobbing and starts to scream…we see blood splash onto the fence along with claw marks.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Level 3 Horror Scene

What I learned is how to create more intense horror emotions for both my characters and the audience.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT – NIGHT
The door slowly opens and Alex steps out. He carefully scans the area. He lights a flare.

ALEX
Okay, lets go. Nashoba, you go first. Girls, follow him and I’ll be right behind. As long as we have the flares, we should be okay.

They begin moving to the watchtower using flares as protection. Alex protects the others and is the last to go.

BETH
We’ll never make it. It’s waiting for us. It’s out there.

MEGHANN
We have to do this Beth. It’s our only chance. Come on, let’s go.

Nashoba starts walking fast in the direction of the watchtower. He holds a flare and scans constantly as he moves.

Meghann grabs Beth’s hand and pulls her out the door. Beth resists.

BETH
I can’t do it!

She is crying.

MEGHANN
Come on Beth, we have to leave now.

Beth reluctantly obliges. They move quickly trying to catch up with Nashoba. Nashoba reaches the watchtower. The door is stuck and won’t open. He frantically jerks the knob trying to open the door.

NASHOBA
(To the door)
Open up you…

He pries it loose just as the girls catch up with him. He struggles to pull the door open. The girls enter. Nashoba turns and looks for Alex. He freezes with fear.

NASHOBA
The spirits are angry.

Nashoba stands in the doorway to the watchtower. Beth screams at him. They can’t see outside.

BETH
Shut the door. Hurry!

MEGHANN
Where’s Alex?

Alex methodically walks backwards. He holds a flare with his arm extended in front of him. From Alex’s POV, we see the creature in front of him. The flare hold the creature at bay.

ALEX
Just go away you son-of-a-bitch. Leave us alone.

As Alex walks backwards, the creature matches him step for step. Alex waives the flare at it. The creature snarls and growls at him. Before Alex reaches the watchtower, his flare goes out.

NASHOBA
Run Alex. Now.

Alex stares at the creature and frantically pulls out another flare. He tries to light it, but it won’t light. The monster shows sharp teeth.

ALEX
Come on flare, light already.

Alex looks at the watchtower then back at the creature. The creature is moving closer to Alex. Alex panics and starts running in the direction of the watchtower.
Just before he reaches the door, he falls to the ground, face first.

ALEX
Nooooo!

He is pulled away by his legs. We hear him screaming. The door to the watchtower shuts.

INT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
The Meghann and Beth are in the top room of the watchtower. The are watching the horror outside.

MEGHANN
No, No, No.
Both girls scream and cry hysterically. Nashoba is able to light another flare and steps back outside. He uses that flare to light a second flare.

EXT. WATCHTOWER. SIMUTANEOUSLY
Nashoba moves toward the creature.

NASHOBA
Get away from him.

He waves the flares at the creature. The creature stops and glares at Nashoba. The monster starts after him and Nashoba throws the flare at it and its fur catches on fire. It screams , flails around trying to put out the fire, and leaves as the fire is out, but its fur is smoking.

Alex is still breathing. Blood is gurgling out of his mouth. His abdominal cavity is ripped open and blood is everywhere. Nashoba kneels down beside him.

NASHOBA
Hang in there man.

Alex looks at him and can’t speak. He stops breathing and dies.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry;s Fear, suspense, dread scene

What I learned is how to create dread by using a dilemma for to choose an action.

INT. ENCAMPMENT.LATER
No one is talking. Beth is sitting in the floor. From her POV, we see a closed door. She stands up and has her cell phone in her hand.

MEGHANN
What are you doing? Get down. We don’t want it to see us. Beth?

Beth ignores her and moves towards the door with laser focus.

CHAD
Where the fuck are you going? You’re gonna get us killed.

Beth still does not respond. She moves closer to the door. The others remain sitting. We hear scratching and thumping noises coming from the behind the door.

MEGHANN
What’s in there?

No one answers her. Beth stops short of the door. From her POV, we see the door knob. She slowly starts to reach for the door knob. She has an intense look in her face.

The others begin to stand up watching her. The noise behind the door continues.

ALEX
Wait a minute. Don’t do it. Get away.

Her hand is trembling as it nears the door knob. She slowly turns the knob.

MEGHANN
Beth, no!

Everyone is tense.

She slowly starts to turn the knob. BAM! A racoon busts through the door. Everyone jumps and screams. Beth drops her phone.

CHAD
What the hell man?

Beth picks up her phone.

BETH
(To the racoon)
Ugh, you little asshole.

Beth moans in frustration. She pushes the door open and shines her light inside the room and carefully peaks her head inside. She goes inside.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry's Horror Outline Version two

Title: Terror on Calvary Mountain

Concept:
When college friends set search for an abandoned Calvary encampment and mistakenly disturb an Indian burial ground, they are trapped and terrorized by a giant, malevolent creature from the spirit world.

ACT 1
EXT. CALVARY ENCAMPMENT. DUSK
Three U.S. Calvary soldiers are running for their lives through the woods. One pulls out his Colt revolver and shoots over his shoulder as he runs. Their faces are gripped with terror. You can hear the grunts and of the creature that’s chasing them. Suddenly, with a flash, one soldier disappears. The others keep running. Another flash and a second soldier disappear. The last soldier makes it back to the encampment and tries to enter the watchtower. The door is locked. He screams at someone to let him in. He turns around with terror on his face. He just begins to scream, and we see blood splash on the side of the watchtower. We hear him gurgling and the creature lets out an ear-piercing scream.

INT.WATCHTOWER. SIMULTANEOUSLY
A group of Calvary soldiers are huddled inside listening to their fellow soldier being killed.

EXT. HOUSE DRIVEWAY. DAY
Alex, the leader, is loading backpacks into the vehicle. They discuss going on this hike as their last trip graduation. He tells Meghann, the Moral One, about he and his dad spending time hiking in the woods and mentions rumors of big, hairy monsters being seen in the woods. He demonstrates that he is very knowledgeable about the outdoors and is a capable leader.
Meghann shows anxiety about going to that location. He teases her, giving her a hard time.
She is sweet to him but shows her sassy and confident side by giving the hard time right back to Alex. Alex assures her that it’s just a rumor and he’ll protect her.

Beth, the Rule Breaker, arrives carrying her backpack. She doesn’t see Meghann and starts flirting with Alex until Meghann pops up. Beth’s demeanor instantly changes after seeing Meghann. She starts to put her backpack in the vehicle when Chad, the Obnoxious One, jumps out from under a blanket and scares her. She screams and punches him. The others laugh.

Chad lets the others know he doesn’t care what they think. He’s going to do his own thing. Alex gets in Chad’s face and lets him know that this is serious business and that his actions could get someone killed.

Bennie, the Complainer, is the last one to arrive. The others are already aggravated with him for making them wait. He makes excuses and blames his lateness on someone else. He makes a crude joke. Beth and Chad laugh, but Meghann and Alex are not amused.

EXT. NASHOBA’S HOUSE. DAY
Nashoba, the introvert, is outside helping his elderly Grandmother move items in her yard as the others pull up in the vehicle. He quietly greets the others. He is awkward and makes it seem that he’s not well acquainted with them.

Nashoba’s elderly Native American Grandmother warns them about the Shampe, the Hairy Man. Shampe is the Choctaw word for Bigfoot. She cautions them not to go. She explains that this creature is said to be a man-eater and that their spirit protects the Native burial grounds hidden in the forest. She says something evil happened in those woods. It’s sacred ground and shouldn’t be disturbed. It needs to be left alone.

The Grandmother gives Nashoba a spiritual item (maybe a necklace) and urges him to keep the item with him for protection. Nashoba assures his grandmother he will respect the spirits, and they will be okay.

INT. VEHICLE. DAY
Alex assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about. Chad adds that the old lady is crazy. Nashoba warns him not to anger the spirits. Chad scoffs at him. Meghann agrees with Alex and angrily tells Chad the woman and Nashoba aren’t crazy. She tells him to be quiet. He rolls his eyes.
Bennie tries to convince himself that there is nothing to worry about. He complains that he didn’t want to go on this trip in the first place. He farts and gags the others. He tells them he ate cheese enchiladas and forgot to take his lactose pills.

EXT. WOODS. DAY
They get lost. They lose their sense of direction. Chad and Beth tease Alex for getting lost since he’s supposed to be a big woodsman.
Chad argues with Alex about the correct direction to proceed. Meghann jumps in to play peacemaker.

EXT. WOODS. LATER
There is movement in the trees. Meghann sees a figure, but then it is gone. No one else sees it.

EXT. WOODS. MOMENTS LATER
A clump of gray animal hair clings to a branch 7 feet off the ground.

EXT. INDIAN BURIAL GROUND. DUSK
They smell something with such a horrible stench, they blame Bennie.
They discover an Indian Burial marker. Chad throws it into the woods.

EXT.NASHOBA’S GRANDMOTHER’S HOUSE.DUSK
The Grandmother looks up to the sky. She says something in Choctaw. Then in English, “The spirits are angry.”

EXT. WOODS. SIMULTANEOUSLY
The creature appears through an inter-dimensional portal. From the Creature’s POV, it can see them.

EXT.WOODS-SWINGING BRIDGE.DAY
They cross a rickety, swinging bridge over a steep ravine. They argue about crossing because it looks dangerous. They begin crossing the bridge that has missing boards. As the first-person crosses, a board breaks, and they almost fall. As the last two cross, we see the bridge about to give way and collapse. Just as they are almost to the end, the bridge collapses. They grab part of the bridge and hold on. They are dangling over the ravine’s edge with a high ledge. The others scramble to pull them to safety. They are now isolated.

EXT. ABANDONED CALVARY ENCAMPMENT. DAY
They see a tall fence constructed of tree trunks. It’s grown over and abandoned. They begin to move closer. Suddenly, they hear loud snapping of tree branches. They freeze and listen. They hear more branches cracking and getting closer. They rush to the fence and look for an opening. They find a gate and tear away the overgrowth. As the gate is cleared, they see signs of the previous horror, blood splatter, deep claw marks, etc. The creature lets out a loud scream. They frantically try to open the gate. They can’t get it open. The sound is getting closer. They finally can pull the gate open enough to get inside.

INT. ENCAMPMENT. DAY
They push the gate shut and find a pole to help barricade the gate.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. SIMULTANEOUSLY
From the creatures POV. It’s looking at the gate.

ACT 2
INT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Trapped inside the encampment with the creature outside. They now know that the creature they were warned about does exist. They look for a way inside one of the buildings behind the fence. Only two buildings and a watchtower near the main gate are still standing. Other buildings have collapsed. They find a way in one of the buildings and look for a way to secure the door.

Bennie starts to break down in fear. He yells at Alex for telling them it would be okay. They argue again about what to do next. How do they escape with the bridge out and the creature after them? Alex believes that the creature is most likely more active at night, and they should hunker down and wait until morning to leave. Others think they are sitting ducks. Nashoba tells them that his grandmother warned them about this and they laughed at her.

Meghann peaks outside through a window and thinks she sees the creature. No one else can see anything. The others are in denial and don’t believe her. They tell her it couldn’t get through the fence without them hearing it.

EXT. WOODS. NIGHT
We see the legs of the creature walking through an inter-dimensional portal and along the fence line.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They hear the creature outside pounding against the fence and snorting. They hide inside and talk quietly.

INT. ENCAMPMENT.LATER
Beth ventures by herself into a different room using her cell phone for light. Her battery dies and she’s in the dark. She falls through the floor.

INT. HIDDEN ROOM. NIGHT
Beth lies on the floor as the others run to her rescue. She finds a lantern. Bennie throws her a lighter. The others look at him confused and he pulls out his weed. She finds old TNT and flares. They make a human ladder and pull her out.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Chad to leave, others want to move to the watchtower. Beth agrees and the two leave. They leave the gate ajar.

EXT.WOODS. NIGHT (MIDPOINT)
The monster stalks them. they can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and blood splashes on Beth’s face. She panics and runs back to the encampment.

INT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Those remaining react to the sight of Beth’s bloody appearance and Chad’s death.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
The creature enters the encampment through the open gate.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT (2nd TP)
They smell the same stench from earlier. They still wonder what the smell is. The others tease Bennie again. Bennie is angry and moves away from the others and sits near a window. The creature smashes through the window and pulls him out. They hear him screaming and gurgling before going silent. They light a flare pointing it at the creature and it retreats.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Nashoba is calm, withdraws, and looks at his spiritual item. Beth is trembling and in shock. Alex goes into action to barricade the opening.
Meghann screams. She eventually regains control of herself and impatiently urges Beth to calm down and help.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
Alex decides on a new plan to move to the watchtower.

EXT. ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
They begin moving to the watchtower using flares as protection. Alex protects the others and is the last to go. His flare is extinguished. He tries to light another one, but fails. There is suspense as he tries to light another flare. He begins to panic and runs towards the watchtower. The creature grabs his legs and pulls him away. He screams and the others are watching him being brutally killed.

INT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
. They react to the horror. Meghann comes up with a new plan to lure the creature to the explosives.

EXT. WATCHTOWER. NIGHT
The monster circles the watchtower, pounding on the walls.

INT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
She rallies everyone to put her plan into place. The light flares and leave.

EXT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
The monster is coming after them.

EXT.ENCAMPMENT. NIGHT
We now see the full Monster.
The monster is going after Meghann. Nashoba tries to distract the monster away from Meghann. The monster swipes its claw at her ripping her skin as blood flies. It slams Meghann across the room. She’s hurt and not moving. The monster slowly starts towards her, when Nashoba screams at it as he moves toward the trap. The monster leaps at him and they both fall into the trap. The building explodes.
Beth is traumatized, but alive. Beth is holding a flare. She begins to scream obscenities toward the monster. The monster emerges from the fire and kills Beth. The creature looks toward Meghann, she appears to be dead. It leaves. As soon as it’s gone, Meghann moves. She’s alive. We see police helicopters flying overhead.

EXT.MONSTER’S WORLD.NIGHT
The creature steps through the portal into a world with many more of his species.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Level 1 Horror Emotion Scene
What I learned is the value of including your horror emotions in your outline!

EXT. STREAM NEAR WOODS. DUSK
A shallow stream runs through the dense woods. Just a glimmer of light peaks through the canopy.

A Native American male guides a small group of hikers crossing down the stream as they make their way through the forest. The sound of branches cracking can be heard in the woods.
The hikers gaze in the direction of the sound with a concerned look.

HIKER 1
What is that?

The guide focuses straight ahead. He keeps moving forward. He doesn’t respond to the question.

The sound gets louder and closer.

HIKER 2
What the hell is out there?

GUIDE
Keep moving.

They begin to move a little faster. Swinging their heads around keeping an eye on the direction of the sounds.

Suddenly, somewhere in the woods, an unseen creature lets out a long, earth-shattering scream. They all are frozen with fear. We see terror on their faces. They are silent for an extended time. The hikers slowly turn their head toward the guide.

The guide makes eye contact with them.

GUIDE
It’s the Hairy Man.

Terror still grips their faces. Suddenly, they catch a glimpse of something out of the corner of their eye. They turn, and just as they begin to scream…the screen goes black.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 3 weeks ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

I’m looking for someone to exchange feedback with. Thanks.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

ACT 1
EXT. STREAM NEAR WOODS. DUSK
Native American guide with hikers crossing a stream on the outside of the forest tree line. They see movement and noises in the forest. An unseen creature lets out an extended, earth-shattering scream. Something is there and we don’t know what it is.
They hear the scream. They are frozen with fear. We see terror on their faces. Just as they begin to scream, the screen goes black.

EXT. HOUSE DRIVEWAY. DAY

Alex, the leader, is loading backpacks into the vehicle. He tells Meghann, the Moral One, about he and his dad spending time hiking in the woods. He demonstrates that he is very knowledgeable about the outdoors and is a capable leader. He teases Meghann, giving her a hard time.

Meghann is assisting Alex in loading the vehicle. She is sweet to him but shows her sassy and confident side by giving the hard time right back to Alex.

Beth, the Rule Breaker, arrives carrying her backpack. She doesn’t see Meghann and starts flirting with Alex until Meghann pops up. She starts to put her backpack in the vehicle when

Chad, the Obnoxious One, jumps out and scares her. She screams and punches him. The others laugh.
Chad lets the others know he doesn’t care what they think. He’s going to do his own thing. This causes tension between Chad and the others right from the beginning.

Bennie, the Complainer, is the last one to arrive. The others are already aggravated with him. He makes excuses and blames his lateness on someone else. He makes a crude joke. Beth and Chad laugh, but Meghann and Alex are not amused.

EXT. NASHOBA’S HOUSE. DAY
Nashoba, the introvert, is outside helping his elderly Grandmother move items in her yard as the others pull up in the vehicle. He quietly greets the others. He is awkward and makes it seem that he’s not well acquainted with them.

Nashoba’s elderly Native American Grandmother warns them about the Shampe, the Hairy Man. Shampe is the Choctaw word for Bigfoot. She cautions them not to go. She explains that this creature is said to be a man-eater and that their spirit protects the Native burial grounds hidden in the forest.

The Grandmother gives Nashoba a spiritual item (maybe a necklace) and urges him to keep the item with him for protection. Nashoba assures his grandmother he will respect the spirits, and they will be okay.

INT. VEHICLE. DAY
Alex assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about. Chad adds that the old lady is crazy. Nashoba warns him not to anger the spirits. Chad scoffs at him. Meghann agrees with Alex and angrily tells Chad the woman and Nashoba aren’t crazy. She tells him to be quiet. He rolls his eyes.

Bennie tries to convince himself that there is nothing to worry about. He complains that he didn’t want to go on this trip in the first place.

EXT. WOODS. DAY
They get lost trying to find the cabin. They lose their sense of direction. Alex figures out the right way to go and calms everyone down.
Chad argues with Alex about the correct direction to proceed. Meghann jumps in to play peacemaker. Alex wins the argument.

As they walk, there is unusual movement in the trees. Meghann thinks she sees a figure moving in the trees, but then it is gone. No one else sees it. She brushes it off.

They smell something with such a horrible stench it gags them. They blame it on Bennie (the complainer) and his gastrointestinal issues.

They cross a swinging bridge over a steep ravine. As soon as they all cross safely, a large tree falls and knocks the bridge down. Beth tries to call someone and discovers there is no cell service at their location. As they walk off, Beth unknowingly drops her phone and leaves it behind.

EXT.NATIVE BURIAL GROUND.DAY
During the hike to the cabin, they discover an ancient Native American burial ground, which is overgrown and spooky. They decide to enter.

Chad disturbs one the graves and breaks the grave marker for a Chief. The others are aghast by his actions.
After they leave the burial site, the ground begins to shake and the grave that has been disturbed, the earth begins to crack.

INT. CABIN. DUSK
They are getting settled inside the cabin, the creature is lurking outside. It’s found them!

ACT 2

INT. CABIN. NIGHT
Trapped inside the cabin with the creature outside. They don’t know what is outside or how to defend themselves.
Meghann looks outside and believes she sees the monster. No one else can see anything. The others are in denial and don’t believe her.
Beth denies the existence of the Hairy Man.

EXT. WOODS. NIGHT
From the Monster’s POV, we see the cabin our victims are in. It’s watching them. We still don’t see the monster.

INT.CABIN. NIGHT
They hear the creature outside. They aren’t sure what it is. They hide inside and try to stay quiet.
They hear sounds of something big moving through the woods. They hear a large animal growl and what sounds like an attack that suddenly stops just after starting.
Alex comes up with a plan to protect them. The others disagree with his plan and causes an internal conflict, especially with Chad.

INT. CABIN. NIGHT
The light goes out causing them to be in the dark. Beth is petrified of the dark. She becomes hysterical. Meghann tries to calm her down. They use the light on their phone to search for a different light source. They find an old lantern. Bennie pulls out a light to light the lantern. The others look at him confused as to why he has a lighter. He pulls out his weed.

EXT.NASHOBA’S GRANDMOTHER’S HOUSE.NIGHT
The Grandmother looks up to the sky. She says something in Choctaw. Then in English, “The spirits are angry.”

INT.CABIN. NIGHT
They smell the same stench from earlier. They still wonder what the smell is. The others tease Bennie as if he is the one who smells.
The creature goes silent. They think it’s gone. Beth wants to go outside to look for her phone she dropped earlier. The others warn her against it. She goes anyway. Alex goes to protect her.

EXT.WOODS.NIGHT
Alex and Beth go outside to look for her phone. They keep an eye out for the monster. The creature isn’t gone. It circles them. Alex tries to fight the creature using a rifle. The gun doesn’t stop the monster. He is blindsided and snatched. We don’t see the monster, but blood splashes on Beth’s face. Beth screams and starts running back toward the cabin. As she gets closer, we hear the monster coming after her. She gets inside just in time.

Beth makes it back into the cabin. She becomes hysterical trying to recall what she saw. Reaction: They try to come up with another plan to kill the monster.

INT.CABIN.NIGHT
They hear Beth beating on the door and screaming to be let in. They open the door quickly and barricade it again. Beth is screaming hysterically.
Bennie screams, tries to hide and begins to panic.
Nashoba is calm, withdraws, and looks at his spiritual item.
Meghann screams and becomes angry for the loss of Alex, her boyfriend. She eventually regains control of herself and impatiently urges the others to calm down and help barricade the cabin.
Chad screams obscenities at the others for being hysterical. He takes charge after Alex’s death.

EXT.CABIN. NIGHT
The monster tries to gain access to the cabin, and they come up with a new plan to stop it.
The monster circles the cabin, pounding on the walls. They try to solve it by finding the weak spots and putting out barricades.
We see more of the monster, but not the full monster. Maybe it’s sharp teeth or something else menacing.

INT.CABIN. NIGHT
Bennie refuses to cooperate with the others. He is continuously panicking and being loud to draw the monster’s attention against the wishes of the others.
Chad tries to convince the others that the only way to survive is to leave the cabin. He argues with the others. They want to stay.
As the creature gets near them, the Native character says something in Choctaw and the creature backs off. The others are paranoid that he is part of the terror.
Nashoba says something in his Choctaw language and holds the item the elderly woman gave him. The monster backs off.
The others realize that Nashoba is important to defeating the monster and they become closer to him.

EXT.WOODS. NIGHT
Chad becomes abusive to the others. He tries to take control of the group and makes a bad decision that puts them in more danger. Maybe he decides to leave, and the others refuse to follow.
The monster stalks him. He can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and we don’t see what happens.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR

INT.CABIN.NIGHT
The remaining victims discuss a new plan. Meghann takes charge.
They smell that horrible smell again; they realize now that it’s the monster that smells. Bennie sits against the wall and yells at the others that it’s not him that smells bad. The others tell him to be quiet.
Bennie is sitting next to the wall inside the cabin next to a window. The monster stealthily moves towards the window. Bennie seems relaxed inside when suddenly, the monster’s arm crashes through the window and pulls Bennie through the window. We hear him screaming. We don’t see what happens to him.
The others become hysterical and try to escape by running to a different room in the cabin.

As the characters run from the horror Meghann falls through the floor and lands in a hidden room (they find something to help fight the creature, e.g. Weapons, explosives, etc.) The others are in a panic. They look for a way to get the person out.

EXT.WOODS.NIGHT
We see more of the monster now. It seems to become more brazen. Does something terrifying.

INT.CABIN.NIGHT
Character Journey: Meghann comes up with a plan to use the items found to defeat the monster. She rallies everyone to put her plan into place.

EXT.CABIN. NIGHT
The monster is coming after them.

INT.CABIN. NIGHT
The three remaining characters come face-to-face with the creature. They are forced to fight to the death. They attempt to fight back with the weapons found in the hidden room.
We now see the full Monster.
Just three remain. The monster is going after Meghann. Nashoba distracts the monster. The monster slams Meghann across the room. Nashoba throws his spiritual item toward Meghann. The monster stops and turns towards Nashoba. The monster tears him apart killing him.
The creature destroys the cabin leaving Meghann apparently dead under a pile of debris. Beth is hurt and traumatized, but alive. Beth is holding the weapon (explosives) and uses it on the monster, apparently blowing it up and killing it.

EXT.CABIN. NIGHT
It seems that the monster is dead. Beth screams obscenities in the direction of the monster and taunts it. Suddenly, the monster appears and knocks her head off.

The monster leaves. Suddenly, there is movement in the pile of debris, Meghann is alive.

EXT.MONSTER’S WORLD.NIGHT
The creature has survived, and we get a glimpse of its world, hidden from humans.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 4 weeks ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Character Journey Track

What I learned is how to lay out your characters journey to make sense for the script. It helps to provide a blueprint or path to follow to create great characters and stay on point.

ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil established: Native American guide with hikers crossing a stream on the outside of the forest tree line. They see movement and noises in the forest. An unseen creature lets out an extended, earth-shattering scream. Something is there and we don’t know what it is.

Monster Reveal. Opening: They hear the scream. They are frozen with fear. We see terror on their faces and just as they begin to scream, it stops. We see blood and maybe a piece of clothing floating in the water.

Connect with the characters: Characters are loading the vehicle for their trip and traveling to their destination.

Character Journey: Character Intro: Alex, the leader. He is loading backpacks into the vehicle. He tells Meghann about he and his dad spending time hiking in the woods. He demonstrates that he is very knowledgeable about the outdoors and is a capable leader. He teases Meghann, giving her a hard time.

Character Journey: Character Intro: Meghann is assisting Alex in loading the vehicle. She is sweet to him but shows her sassy and confident side by giving the hard time right back to Alex.
Horror Situation: Chad is hiding, jumping out at to surprise someone. Reaction: They scream, then laugh it off. Denial.

Character Journey: Character Intro: Chad is hiding under something. When Beth approaches, he jumps out and scares her. He lets the others know he doesn’t care what they think. He’s going to do his own thing.

Character Journey: Character Intro: Beth arrives carrying her backpack. She doesn’t see Meghann and starts flirting with Alex until Meghann pops up. She continues to put her backpack in the vehicle when Chad jumps out and scares her. She screams and punches him.

Character Journey: Bennie is the last one to arrive. The others are already aggravated with him. He makes excuses and blames his lateness on someone else. He makes a crude joke. Beth and Chad laugh, but Meghann and Alex are not amused.

Character Journey: Nashoba is outside helping his elderly Grandmother move items in her yard as the others pull up in the vehicle. He quietly greets the others. He is awkward with the others making it seem he’s not well acquainted with them.

The characters are warned not to do it: An elderly Native American woman warns them about the spirit of Shampe, Choctaw word for Bigfoot and cautions them not to go.
Monster Reveal: An elderly Native American woman warns the group about the Hairy Man. She gives Nashoba a spiritual item (maybe a necklace) and urges him to keep the item with him for protection.

Denial of Horror: Alex assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about. Chad adds that the old lady is crazy. Nashoba warns him not to anger the spirits, but assures his Grandmother that he will respect the spirits and they will be okay. Chad scoffs at him. Meghann agrees with Alex and angrily tells Chad the woman and Nashoba aren’t crazy. She tells him to be quiet. He rolls his eyes.

Character Journey: Bennie tries to convince himself that there is nothing to worry about. He complains that he didn’t want to go on this trip in the first place.

Horror Situation: They get lost trying to find the cabin. They lose their sense of direction. Reaction: Solve it. The leader figures out the right way to go and calms everyone down.

Character Journey: Chad argues with Alex about the correct direction to proceed. Alex wins the argument.

Monster Reveal: There is unusual movement in the trees. They think they see something, but then it is gone.

Monster Reveal: They smell something with such a horrible stench it gags them. They blame it on Bennie (the complainer) and his gastrointestinal issues.

Safety taken away: The car becomes disabled, and they discover there is no cell service at their location.

Horror Situation: During the hike to the cabin, they discover an ancient Native American burial ground, which is overgrown and spooky. Reaction: One character disturbs one the graves and removes and ancient relic left behind, while the others are aghast by his actions.

Monster Reveal: After they leave the burial site, the ground begins to shake and the grave that has been disturbed, the earth begins to crack.

Monster: The nature of the beast: With the dead young creature inside the cabin, the adult creature is lurking outside. It’s found them!

ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: Trapped inside the cabin with the creature outside. They don’t know what is outside or how to defend themselves.

Horror Situation: Only one character can see the creature. Reaction: The others are in denial and don’t believe them.

Character Journey: Beth denies the existence of the Hairy Man.

Monster Reveal: From the Monster’s POV, we see the cabin our victims are in. It’s watching them. We still don’t see the monster.

Horror Situation: They hear the creature outside. They aren’t sure what it is. Reaction: They hide inside and try to stay quiet.

Monster Reveal: They hear sounds of something big moving through the woods. They hear a large animal growl and what sounds like an attack that suddenly stops just after starting.

Horror Situation: The leader comes up with a plan to protect them. Reaction: The others disagree with his plan and causes an internal conflict.

Horror Situation: The light goes out causing them to be in the dark. Reaction: They search for a different light source.

Monster Reveal: They smell the same stench from earlier. They still wonder what the smell is.

Horror Situation: The creature goes silent. They think it’s gone, and the female character goes outside to look for her phone she dropped earlier. The Leader goes to protect her. The creature isn’t gone. The Leader tries to fight the creature. Reaction: The female frantically runs back to the cabin. The creature chases her, but she barely makes it back to safety.

Horror Situation: Those inside can hear horror happening outside the others. Reaction: They hide behind a barricade. They are almost hysterical.

One of us killed: The leader is killed.

Character Death 1 : Alex, the Leader. Why? Alex is the leader. Killing him first makes us fearful for the others. How? He is attempting to protect Beth as she goes outside to look for her phone she dropped earlier. She wants to call for help. He is blindsided and snatched. We don’t see the monster, but blood splashes on Beth’s face.

MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought: They now realize that the creature is after them.

Horror Situation: The female makes it back into the cabin. She becomes hysterical trying to recall what she saw. Reaction: They try to come up with another plan to kill the monster.

Character Journey: Reaction to the first horror: Bennie screams, tries to hide and begins to panic. Beth is completely hysterical from the horror she witnessed. Nashoba is calm, withdraws, and looks at his spiritual item. Meghann screams and impatiently urges the others to calm down and help barricade the cabin. Chad screams obscenities at the others for being hysterical. He takes charge after Alex’s death.

Full pursuit by the killer: Creature tries to gain access to the cabin, and they come up with a new plan to stop it.

Horror Situation: The creature circles the cabin, pounding on the walls. Reaction: They try to solve it by finding the weak spots and putting out barricades.

Monster Reveal: We see more of the monster, but not the full monster. Maybe its sharp teeth or something else menacing.

Character Journey: Bennie refuses to cooperate with the others. He is continuously panicking and being loud to draw the monster’s attention against the wishes of the others.

Character Journey: Chad tries to convince the others that the only way to survive is to leave the cabin. He argues with the others. They want to stay.

Horror Situation: As the creature gets near them, the Native character says something in Choctaw and the creature backs off. Reaction: The others are paranoid that he is part of the terror.

Monster Reveal: Nashoba says something in his Choctaw language and holds the item the elderly woman gave him. The monster backs off.

Character Journey: The others realize that Nashoba is important to defeating the monster and they become closer to him.

Terrorized: As the creature becomes more aggressive, Chad goes to confront the creature. The weapon is of no use as he is killed

Character Death 2: Chad – the Obnoxious One. Why? Chad becomes abusive to the others. He tries to take control of the group and makes a bad decision that puts them in more danger. Maybe he decides to leave, and the others refuse to follow.
How? The monster stalks him. He can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and we don’t see what happens.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
Fight to the death: The remaining victims come up with a new plan.

Hysteria: Creature crashes through the cabin wall and snatches another victim pulling them out and killing them.

Monster Reveal: They smell that horrible smell again; they realize now that it’s the monster that smells. Bennie sits against the wall and yells at the others that it’s not him that smells.

Character Death 3: Bennie – the Complainer/Endpoint
Why? By this time, we are sick to death of his complaining and are cheering for him to get killed! How? He is sitting next to the wall inside the cabin next to a window. The monster stealthily moves towards the window. Bennie seems relaxed inside when all of a sudden, the monster’s arm crashes through the window and pulls Bennie through the window. We hear him screaming.

Horror Situation: Character is sitting with their back to the wall. The creature sneaks up without being noticed. Just when the person inside is relaxed, the creature crashes its arm through the wall and snatches them. We assume they’re dead. We don’t see them again. Reaction: The others become hysterical and try to escape by running to a different room in the cabin.

Horror Situation: As the characters run from the horror, one-character falls through the floor and lands in a hidden room (they find something to help fight the creature, e.g. Weapons, explosives, etc.) Reaction: The others are in a panic. They look for a way to get the person out.

Character Journey: Meghann comes up with a plan to use the items found to defeat the monster. She rallies everyone to put her plan into place.

Horror Situation: The three remaining characters come face-to-face with the creature. They are forced to fight to the death. Reaction: They attempt to fight back with the weapons found in the hidden room.

Monster Reveal: We now see the full Monster.

The thrilling escape from death: Just three remain. The Native American male sacrifices his life thinking he will save Meghann. The creature destroys the cabin leaving Meghann apparently dead under a pile of debris. Beth is hurt and traumatized, but alive.

Character Death 4: Nashoba, the Sacrificial Lamb
Why? He sacrifices himself for the others.
How? The monster is going after Beth. Nashoba distracts the monster. The monster slams Meghann across the room. Nashoba throws his spiritual item toward Meghann. The monster stops and turn towards Nashoba. The monster tears him apart killing him.

Death returns to take one or more: We assume it’s over and the monster returns to kill Beth. There is movement in the pile of debris, Meghann is alive.

Character Aparant Death: Meghann, the Moral One
Why is Meghann saved? She is the one who always tries to do the right thing.

Character Journey: Beth takes the explosives(fire) and blows the monster up or sets the cabin on fire.

Character Death 5: Beth, the Rebel/Rule Breaker
Why? It seems that the monster has left. Beth screams obscenities in the direction the monster leaves and taunts the monster. How? Suddenly, the monster appears and knocks her head off. She dies because she couldn’t keep her mouth shut!

Resolution: The creature has survived, and we get a glimpse of its world, hidden from humans.

• This reply was modified 2 months, 4 weeks ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Monster Reveal Track
What I learned by doing this assignment is how to gradually reveal your monster and build terror and suspense throughout the script.

Who is the monster?
• According to Choctaw folklore, Shampe or The Hairy Man is a malevolent, Ogre-like monster.
• It is giant and hairy and it said to be a man-eater.
• It’s most salient feature is its smell.
Powers
• Can go between the real and the spiritual worlds
• Super Strength
• Lightning fast
• Can move around and disappear without being detected.

Limitations
• Spiritual item’s presence causes it back off.
• Can’t fit into small spaces.

Weaknesses
• Afraid of fire

Plan/Purpose/Appetite
• To seek revenge for disturbing the Native American burial site.

ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil established: Native American guide with hikers crossing a stream on the outside of the forest tree line. They see movement and noises in the forest. An unseen creature lets out an extended, earth-shattering scream. Something is there and we don’t know what it is.

Monster Reveal. Opening: They hear the scream. They are frozen with fear. We see terror on their face and just as they begin to scream, it stops. We see blood and maybe a piece of clothing floating in the water.

Connect with the characters: Characters are loading the vehicle for their trip and traveling to their destination.

Horror Situation: One character is hiding, jumping out at to surprise someone. Reaction: They scream, then laugh it off. Denial.
The characters are warned not to do it: An elderly Native American woman warns them about the spirit of Shampe, Choctaw word for Bigfoot and cautions them not to go.

Monster Reveal: An elderly Native American woman warns the group about the Hairy Man. She gives Nashoba a spiritual item (maybe a necklace) and urges him to keep the item with him for protection.

Denial of Horror: The leader assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about and the old lady is crazy.

Horror Situation: They get lost trying to find the cabin. They lose their sense of direction. Reaction: Solve it. The leader figures out the right way to go and calms everyone down.

Monster Reveal: There is unusual movement in the trees. They think they see something, but then it is gone.

Monster Reveal: They smell something with such a horrible stench it gags them. They blame it on Bennie (the complainer) and his gastrointestinal issues.

Safety taken away: The car becomes disabled, and they discover there is no cell service at their location.

Horror Situation: During the hike to the cabin, they discover an ancient Native American burial ground, which is overgrown and spooky. Reaction: One character disturbs one the graves and removes and ancient relic left behind, while the others are aghast by his actions.

Monster Reveal: After they leave the burial site, the ground begins to shake and the grave that has been disturbed, the earth begins to crack.

Monster: The nature of the beast: With the dead young creature inside the cabin, the adult creature is lurking outside. It’s found them!

ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: Trapped inside the cabin with the creature outside. They don’t know what is outside or how to defend themselves.

Horror Situation: Only one character can see the creature. Reaction: The othesr are in denial and don’t believe them.

Monster Reveal: From the Monster’s POV, we see the cabin our victims are in. It’s watching them. We still don’t see the monster.

Horror Situation: They hear the creature outside. They aren’t sure what it is. Reaction: They hide inside and try to stay quiet.

Monster Reveal: They hear sounds of something big moving through the woods. They hear a large animal growl and what sounds like an attack that suddenly stops just after starting.

Horror Situation: The leader comes up with a plan to protect them. Reaction: The others disagree with his plan and causes an internal conflict.

Horror Situation: The light goes out causing them to be in the dark. Reaction: They search for a different light source.

Monster Reveal: They smell the same stench from earlier. They still wonder what the smell is.

Horror Situation: The creature goes silent. They think it’s gone, and the female character goes outside to look for her phone she dropped earlier. The Leader goes to protect her. The creature isn’t gone. The Leader tries to fight the creature. Reaction: The female frantically runs back to the cabin. The creature chases her, but she barely makes it back to safety.

Horror Situation: Those inside can hear horror happening outside the others. Reaction: They hide behind a barricade. They are almost hysterical.

One of us killed: The leader is killed.

Character Death 1 : Alex, the Leader. Why? Alex is the leader. Killing him first makes us fearful for the others. How? He is attempting to protect Beth as she goes outside to look for her phone she dropped earlier. She wants to call for help. He is blindsided and snatched. We don’t see the monster, but blood splashes on Beth’s face.

MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought: They now realize that the creature is after them.

Horror Situation: The female makes it back into the cabin. She becomes hysterical trying to recall what she saw. Reaction: They try to come up with another plan to kill the monster.

Full pursuit by the killer: Creature tries to gain access to the cabin, and they have to come up with a new plan to stop it.

Horror Situation: The creature circles the cabin, pounding on the walls. Reaction: They try to solve it by finding the weak spots and putting out barricades.

Monster Reveal: We see more of the monster, but not the full monster. Maybe its sharp teeth or something else menacing.

Horror Situation: As the creature gets near them, the Native character says something in Choctaw and the creature backs off. Reaction: The others are paranoid that he is part of the terror.

Monster Reveal: Nashoba says something in his Choctaw language and holds the item the elderly woman gave him. The monster backs off.

Terrorized: As the creature becomes more aggressive, Chad goes to confront the creature. The weapon is of no use as he is killed

Character Death 2: Chad – the Obnoxious One. Why? Chad becomes abusive to the others. He tries to take control of the group and makes a bad decision that puts them in more danger. Maybe he decides to leave, and the others refuse to follow.
How? The monster stalks him. He can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and we don’t see what happens.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
Fight to the death: The remaining victims come up with a new plan.

Hysteria: Creature crashes through the cabin wall and snatches another victim pulling them out and killing them.

Monster Reveal: They smell that horrible smell again, they realize now that it’s the monster that smells. Bennie sits against the wall and yells at the others that its not him that smells.

Character Death 3: Bennie – the Complainer
Why? By this time, we are sick to death of his complaining and are cheering for him to get killed!
How? He is sitting next to the wall inside the cabin next to a window. The monster stealthily moves towards the window. Bennie seems relaxed inside when all of a sudden, the monster’s arm crashes through the window and pulls Bennie through the window. We hear him screaming.

Horror Situation: Character is sitting with their back to the wall. The creature sneaks up without being noticed. Just when the person inside is relaxed, the creature crashes its arm through the wall and snatches them. We assume they’re dead. We don’t see them again. Reaction: The others become hysterical and try to escape by running to a different room in the cabin.

Horror Situation: As the characters run from the horror, one-character falls through the floor and lands in a hidden room (they find something to help fight the creature, e.g. Weapons, explosives, etc.) Reaction: The others are in a panic. They look for a way to get the person out.

Horror Situation: One character can’t contain themselves and run from the cabin hoping to reach safety. The creature stalks them. It seems to be all around them, but they can’t see it. It toys with him before killing him. Reaction: He runs trying to escape but fails.

Horror Situation: The three remaining characters come face-to-face with the creature. They are forced to fight to the death. Reaction: They attempt to fight back with the weapons found in the hidden room.

Monster Reveal: We now see the full Monster.

The thrilling escape from death: Just three remain. The Native American male sacrifices his life thinking he will save Meghann. The creature destroys the cabin leaving Meghann apparently dead under a pile of debris. Beth is hurt and traumatized, but alive.

Character Death 4: Nashoba, the Sacrificial Lamb
Why? He sacrifices himself for the others.
How? The monster is going after Beth. Nashoba distracts the monster. The monster slams Meghann across the room and turn towards Nashoba. The monster tears him apart killing him.

Death returns to take one or more: We assume it’s over and the monster returns to kill Beth. There is movement in the pile of debris, Meghann is alive.
Character Aparant Death: Meghann, the Moral One
Why is Meghann saved? She is the one who always tries to do the right thing.

Character Death 5: Beth, the Rebel/Rule Breaker
Why? It seems that the monster has left. Beth screams obscenities in the direction the monster leaves and taunts the monster. How? Suddenly, the monster appears and knocks her head off. She dies because she couldn’t keep her mouth shut!

Resolution: The creature has survived, and we get a glimpse of its world, hidden from humans.

• This reply was modified 3 months ago by  Barry Barry Durbin Durbin.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Thank you so much! I’ll try that. Good luck to you on your script!

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Character Death Track
What I learned by doing this assignment is it made me more familiar with my characters and gave me a chance to think more about their traits and role in the script and give more suitable names and character descriptions when the time comes.

Character Death 1 : Alex, the Leader.
Why? Alex is the leader. Killing him first makes us fearful for the others.
How? He is attempting to protect Beth as she goes outside to look for her phone she dropped earlier. She wants to call for help. He is blindsided and snatched. We don’t see the monster, but blood splashes on Beth’s face.
Character Death 2: Chad – the Obnoxious/Out-of-Control one
Why? Chad becomes abusive to the others. He tries to take control of the group and makes a bad decision that puts them in more danger. Maybe he decides to leave, and the others refuse to follow.
How? The monster stalks him. He can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and we don’t see what happens.

Character Death 3: Bennie – the Complainer
Why? By this time, we are sick to death of his complaining and are cheering for him to get killed!
How? He is sitting next to the wall inside the cabin next to a window. The monster stealthily moves towards the window. Bennie seems relaxed inside when all of a sudden, the monster’s arm crashes through the window and pulls Bennie through the window. We hear him screaming.

Character Aparant Death: Meghann, the Moral One
Why saved? She is the one who always tries to do the right thing.
How? In the final confrontation, the monster comes after her and Nashoba gets the creatures’ attention. The creature slams Meghann across the room, knocking walls down and debris piles on top of her. She isn’t moving and we assume she is dead.

Character Death 4: Nashoba, the Sacrificial Lamb
Why? He sacrifices himself for the others.
How? The monster is going after Beth. Nashoba distracts the monster. The monster slams Meghann across the room and turn towards Nashoba. The monster tears him apart killing him.

Character Death 5: Beth, the Rebel/Rule Breaker
Why? It seems that the monster has left. Beth screams obscenities in the direction the monster leaves and taunts the monster. Suddenly, the monster appears and knocks her head off. She dies because she couldn’t keep her mouth shut!

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Horror Situation Track

What I learned from doing this assignment is that scary doesn’t have to be gore. I’ve learned to incorporate different situations that cause terror that are more psychological.

ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil established: Native American guide with hikers crossing a stream on the outside of the forest tree line. They see movement and noises in the forest. An unseen creature lets out an extended, earth-shattering scream. Something is there and we don’t know what it is.

Connect with the characters: Characters are loading the vehicle for their trip and traveling to their destination.

Horror Situation: One character is hiding, jumping out at to surprise someone. Reaction: They scream, then laugh it off. Denial.
The characters are warned not to do it: An elderly Native American woman warns them about the spirit of Shampe, Choctaw word for Bigfoot and cautions them not to go.

Denial of Horror: The leader assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about and the old lady is crazy.

Horror Situation: They get lost trying to find the cabin. They lose their sense of direction. Reaction: Solve it. The leader figures out the right way to go and calms everyone down.

Safety taken away: The car becomes disabled, and they discover there is no cell service at their location.

Horror Situation: Two characters venture out and kill a young mysterious creature and bring the body back to cabin. This will draw horror to them. Reaction: One character warns of the danger, while the others deny any danger.

Monster: The nature of the beast: With the dead young creature inside the cabin, the adult creature is lurking outside. It’s found them!

ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: Trapped inside the cabin with the creature outside. They don’t know what is outside or how to defend themselves.

Horror Situation: Only one character can see the creature. Reaction: The other are in denial and don’t believe them.

Horror Situation: They hear the creature outside. They aren’t sure what it is. Reaction: They hide inside and try to stay quiet.

Horror Situation: The leader comes up with a plan to protect them. Reaction: The others disagree with his plan and causes an internal conflict.

Horror Situation: The light goes out causing them to be in the dark. Reaction: They search for a different light source.

Horror Situation: The creature goes silent. They think it’s gone, and the female character goes outside to look for her phone she dropped earlier. The Leader goes to protect her. The creature isn’t gone. The Leader tries to fight the creature. Reaction: The female frantically runs back to the cabin. The creature chases her, but she barely makes it back to safety.
Horror Situation: Those inside can hear horror happening outside the others. Reaction: They hide behind a barricade. They are almost hysterical.

One of us killed: The leader is killed.

MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought: They now realize that the creature is after them.

Horror Situation: The female makes it back into the cabin. She becomes hysterical trying to recall what she saw. Reaction: They try to come up with another plan to kill the monster.

Full pursuit by the killer: Creature tries to gain access to the cabin, and they have to come up with a new plan to stop it.

Horror Situation: The creature circles the cabin, pounding on the walls. Reaction: They try to solve it by finding the weak spots and putting out barricades.

Horror Situation: As the creature gets near them, the Native character says something in Choctaw and the creature backs off. Reaction: The others are paranoid that he is part of the terror.

Terrorized: As the creature becomes more aggressive, the leader goes to confront the creature with a rifle. The weapon is of no use the leader is killed. Meghann is now ready to fight to the death.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
Fight to the death: The remaining victims come up with a new plan.

Hysteria: Creature crashes through the cabin wall and snatches another victim pulling them out and killing them.

Horror Situation: Character is sitting with their back to the wall. The creature sneaks up without being noticed. Just when the person inside is relaxed, the creature crashes its arm through the wall and snatches them. We assume they’re dead. We don’t see them again. Reaction: The others become hysterical and try to escape by running to a different room in the cabin.

Horror Situation: As the characters run from the horror, one-character falls through the floor and lands in a hidden room (they find something to help fight the creature, e.g. Weapons, explosives, etc.) Reaction: The others are in a panic. They look for a way to get the person out.

Horror Situation: One character can’t contain themselves and run from the cabin hoping to reach safety. The creature stalks them. It seems to be all around them, but they can’t see it. It toys with him before killing him. Reaction: He runs trying to escape but fails.

Horror Situation: The two remaining characters come face-to-face with the creature. They are forced to fight to the death. Reaction: The two attempt to fight back with the weapons found in the hidden room.

The thrilling escape from death: Just two remain. The Native American male sacrifices his life thinking he will save Meghann. The creature destroys the cabin leaving Meghann hurt and under a pile of debris.

Death returns to take one or more: The creature finds the dead baby (or collect the Native artifact). Let’s out a blood curling scream, take the body and disappear. There is movement in the pile of debris, Meghann is alive.

Resolution: Creature takes the body, and we get a glimpse of its world, hidden from humans.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

ASSIGNMENT 4

Barry’s Horror Plot!

What I learned?
By digging into deeper levels, I had a breakthrough that has given me more clarity on my concept, monster, and characters.
Updated Concept:
When hunters kill a young, mysterious creature, they take the body planning to cash in on their discovery until an adult creature unleashes terror as the body count rises.

ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Atmosphere of Evil established: Native American guide with hikers crossing a stream on the outside of the forest tree line. They see movement and noises in the forest. An unseen creature lets out an extended, earth-shattering scream. Something is there and we don’t know what it is.
Connect with the characters: Characters are loading the vehicle for their trip and traveling to their destination.
The characters are warned not to do it: An elderly Native American woman warns them about the spirit of Shampe, Choctaw word for Bigfoot and cautions them not to go.
Denial of Horror: The leader assures everyone that he is an expert woodsman, and they have nothing to worry about and the old lady is crazy.
Safety taken away: The car becomes disabled and they discover there is no cell service at their location.
Monster: The nature of the beast: With the dead young creature inside the cabin, the adult creature is lurking outside. It’s found them!

ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: Trapped inside the cabin with the creature outside. They don’t know what is outside or how to defend themselves.
One of us killed: They think the creature is gone. One goes outside to use the bathroom and gets killed.
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought: They now realize that they’ve disturbed the Native spirits and it’s after them.
Full pursuit by the killer: Creature tries to gain access to the cabin and they have to come up with a new plan to stop it.
Terrorized: As the creature becomes more aggressive, the leader goes to confront the creature with a rifle. The weapon is of no use the leader is killed. Meghann is now ready to fight to the death.

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
Fight to the death: The remaining victims come up with a new plan.
Hysteria: Creature crashes through the cabin wall and snatches another victim pulling them out and killing them.
The thrilling escape from death: Just two remain. The Native American male sacrifices his life thinking he will save Meghann. The creature destroys the cabin leaving Meghann hurt and under a pile of debris.
Death returns to take one or more: The creature finds the dead baby. Lets out a blood curling scream, takes the body and disappears. There is movement in the pile of debris, Meghann is alive.
Resolution: Creature takes the body and we get a glimpse of its world, hidden from humans.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Characters of Horror

ASSIGNMENT 3

What I learned from doing this assignment is how to create my characters that fit the concept.
1. Tell us your Concept and the Group you have chosen.
My concept is: When hunters mistakenly kill a young Bigfoot, an enraged Mama Bigfoot tracks them to an isolated village and terrorizes them seeking revenge. The group is hunters who killed the monster’s offspring

2. Tell us the Dying Pattern of this movie.
6 to 8 people and kill them off one by on

3. Give us an Identity and a sentence for each character that makes up your group.
Leader – Jack, seasoned hunter, takes action without others input.
Complainer – Toby, over-weight and only cares about his next meal.
Moral one – Chris, pleads to not take the dead baby back with them.
Rescuer – Meghann, the leader’s Mother, a local Game Warden.
Out-of-Control/Obnoxious – Scooter, a hell raiser without an once of control
Monster Bait – Teddy, a naive kid who has never been hunting.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

1. My name is Barry Durbin
2. How many scripts you’ve written? I’ve written one script
3. What you hope to get out of the class? The accountability to complete my second script.
4. Something unique, special, strange or unusual about you? I recently met Elvin Bishop!

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

ASSIGNMENT 2: Crafting you monster
What I learned doing this assignment was the layers of complexity it takes to create your monster!
1. Tell us what or who your monster is. An enraged female Bigfoot seeking revenge for the death of her offspring.
2. Give us a few sentences for each of the following for your monster:
• Their Terror: It is stealthy, unseen, strong, smart, and fast. It isolates by blocking the only way out, destroys the vehicle to leave, knocks out electricity, so can’t charge phones.
• Their Mystery: How do they kill the monster before it kills them.
• Their Fear Provoking Appearance: Larger than life, stringy hair, sharp teeth.
• Their Rules: Viciously protect their young, remain hidden from humans
• Their Mythology: They are hidden from humans in a secret society

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Lesson 1 Assignment: Concept and Conventions
Animal Horror Conventions

5. Answer the question “What I learned doing this assignment is the difference between horrors and thrillers and how important the horror conventions are for this genre.
2. Watch the movie and as you do, note its conventions.
• Title: ANIMAL
• Concept: When plans for a weekend vacation hit a dead end, friends find themselves stranded in unfamiliar territory, pursued by a bloodthirsty predator. Holed up in an isolated cabin, the friends must fight to survive as the body count rises.
• Terrorize The Characters: Trapped with no way to escape
• Isolation: Isolated cabin with monster outside trapping them inside.
• Death: Characters are eaten alive, one by one.
• Monster/Villain: A bloodthirsty predator type monster.
• High Tension: Characters are in constant fear of death
• Departure from Reality: Predator creature that does not exist.
• Moral Statement: There are consequences for not using common sense.
3. Anything else you’d like to say about what made this movie a great horror film? It began with the creature killing someone, so we know how dangerous the situation is before our characters enter into the environment.
4. With your concept, fill in each of these Conventions for your story.
• Concept: When hunters mistakenly kill a young Bigfoot, an enraged Mama Bigfoot tracks them to an isolated village and terrorizes them seeking revenge.
• Terrorize The Characters: Unstoppable creature terrorizes characters to seek revenge for her baby’s death.
• Isolation: Isolated hunting village with only one way in/out. Creature blocks road out. Cell phones are disabled.
• Death: Characters die horrible deaths one by one.
• Monster/Villain: Female Bigfoot
• High Tension: Characters will be in constant fear of death, fear of the unseen
• Departure from Reality: Mythical creature stalking and killing humans.
• Moral Statement: People who wrongfully kill will be punished.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry Durbin
“I agree to the terms of this release form.”

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Thank you.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Okay, thank you. Even if you don’t need the feedback, it would help me to have someone else take a look. Thanks so much.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Hello David, I’m looking for someone to exchange feedback. Interested?

Thanks,
Barry

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Hello JD, I would be up to exchange feedback if you haven’t found anyone yet. My email is barry@grooveshackstudios.com. I look forward to reading your outline.

Barry

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Hello Renee,

Can I ask you how you are able to keep you’re formatting when posting your assignments? Thanks, and have a great day!

Barry